Sam and Nia's intense love story felt as if it were lifted from their favorite romance movie. Yet, they could never have predicted that one day, it would become the heart of a controversial Netflix documentary. Their whirlwind journey from a fairytale wedding to unexpected YouTube fame reached a critical juncture when Sam’s darkest secrets were leaked to the public, grabbing headlines nationwide. With two contrasting versions of their story—one for the public and one behind closed doors—this raw memoir stands as Sam and Nia's final confession, separating reality from rumor and an integral chapter in their story of redemption.
Sam and Nia are the dynamic duo who have captured the hearts of millions as outspoken Christian family YouTube content creators. In 2015, they pioneered the lip-sync craze that continues to captivate audiences worldwide. Their journey has evolved with daily family vlogs, amassing over 1.2 billion views across their videos. Sam and Nia are the highlighted couple in the Netflix docuseries Ashley Sex, Lies, and Scandal. After a decade filled with unimaginable twists and turns, they co-authored this memoir to fully and truthfully share their story. They’ve been married for 13 years and are parents to four children. They are passionately involved in marriage ministry and dedicated to helping others find the same healing and growth they have experienced.
Unlike other reviewers I did put this book down several times. I had to, because it was a hard read for me. I had to pause to stretch my mind and heart before I could read on.
Sam and Nia were telling my story. Sometimes they told the story I lived. Other times they told the story I longed to live, but didn’t get to. I met these two during the filming of the Netflix documentary on Ashley Madison. I was the other betrayed wife. The one who didn’t get to see her marriage restored. I approached this book with both hope and dread. I hoped their words would support what I thought to be true of them—that they were genuine lovers of Jesus whose marriage had been restored through the hard work of confession, accountability, and humility. I dreaded reading the details, fully expecting that my trauma and would be triggered by theirs.
My hopes were realized—and more. The story told here only confirmed what I already felt about these two. They are the real deal. My dread was realized as well. I had to process some of the feelings of rejection, anger, and betrayal Sam and Nia’s raw honesty stirred up in me.
But there was so much more on this book that I didn’t expect. Sam and my husband are very different people, and yet their stories are much the same. I never had the luxury of seeing behind my husband’s mask, but I feel like Sam has given me a glimpse of how the addicted mind thinks. And how a man who has been taken out of the pit and redeemed can go back to that pit again and again. Sam even gave me insight into God’s patience as he moved from partial to full confession.
I’ve had some good counseling in the years since my husband’s suicide, but Nia’s fearless recounting of her pain touched a deep and hidden part of me, and I got to say, “Oh sweet Nia, me too.” Feeling Nia’s pain with her opened up some areas that I hadn’t exposed to God’s healing light. It’s been almost nine years, and God is still healing me.
A few reviewers have questioned the Rader’s motives for sharing their story. This is confession. When we speak our stories aloud to each other, God heals our hearts. He gives us accountability. And we comfort each other with the comfort with which we’ve been comforted.
Thank you Sam and Nia for this book. It hurt, but like a good workout, it hurt so good!
What’s more narcissistic, getting out a camera to vlog a CPS visit to show the haters or making your wife change the song she chose to walk down the aisle to? So much food for thought in only 250 pages.
Got kindle unlimited just to hate read this without giving them money tbh. These people are trash.
Also they supposedly wrote alternating chapters, but my conspiracy theory is that he wrote her parts too, or at least went in and inserted a lot of over the top praise of himself.
Went into this open minded after seeing them on the AM documentary. Unbelievably, the more I learn about these two the more insufferable they both seem.
I just can’t rate their personal story of infidelity.. so no rating on this one.
I have some thoughts though. I appreciated Nias testimony. It’s amazing how she relied on Jesus to get her through such a tough time. HOWEVER, As believers we have permission to divorce in the case of infidelity.. Nia stayed with her husband after he slept with multiple women (some of those he paid). She forgave him, and then he told her TEN months before they filmed a documentary about said affairs that he flirted with a woman at Starbucks and was “attracted” to this woman…. He said he has to control his “impulses” and “attractions” to other women. Wtf. How can she even be around other females with her husband? He clearly has a huge issue that isn’t resolved. Yes, he’s forgiven through the blood of Jesus, but no, he clearly hasn’t figured out how to not flirt with other women. He still clearly wants to sleep with women other than his wife!!!! NIA.. GIRL.. RUN. What is she still doing with this man??
I’ve watched them on YouTube for years which is why I read this book. I’ve always gotten weird vibes from Sam. Now I know why 😫 my heart hurts for Nia.
I didn't know who these people were, but their story sounded interesting, so I burned through it in 24 hours.
I don't rate memoirs and I'm not going to decide how healthy their marriage is or is not, but I was compelled by a few threads apart from infidelity and forgiveness: fatherlessness, loneliness, deep insecurities, and chasing fame.
As a Christian myself, I am always curious about how to deal with sex in a factual and uplifting way without relaxing the standards. I have a weird mix of unhealthy "purity culture" influences alongside a multi generational family pattern of shotgun weddings and infidelity among employed church leadership. Can we extend forgiveness and have clear boundaries at the same time? If so, what does that look like? I find the Orthodox path to repentance deeply meaningful and helpful, but I'm also not naive enough to think that we don't struggle with these things over in this camp.
I have a lot of thoughts, but will probably keep them for my journal.
This is worth a read--not for this couple's particular story, but for the food for thought it provides.
"I realized these weren't ordinary nosebleeds; they were symbols of how deeply Nia affected me."
"Then, with the grace and mercy of a dove, she did one better. She pushed her chin into her left shoulder and slowly slid her gaze toward me."
If you can stomach lines like that and them calling each other "Cutie" every other page, then you might enjoy this. It reads like a gross, fame hungry, codependent relationship.
As a long, long time subscriber (since abram was a baby) i adored the rader family as it brought me joy in my young adult years to now my adult years. When I heard about the netflix doc coming I was so excited to watch as the story was never really told on youtube. Watched it & knew i needed more context. This book really surprised me as it was very well written. A page turner for sure as i’m in the middle of moving cross country & still finished in 3 days LOL. Loved hearing the behind the scenes of sam and nia as we never really knew the full story as fans (i don’t blame you guys, i wouldn’t post about it either) Definitely opened up my eyes to see the struggles of their marriage as on youtube they always seemed a picture perfect family. I know there’s no such thing as a perfect family but reading this was super refreshing to me. Glad God was there to restore the faith in your marriage.
I have been following Sam & Nia since their 2nd video went viral on YouTube, and I have seen probably every single Vlog that has been uploaded since that day. I have seen them grow through the years and change. I've always known them to be very genuine and sincerely desiring to grow as Christians and exemplify Christ's love through their social media platforms. When I first learned that they were writing a book, I was very excited and anticipated the day that I would be able to read it. Once you start reading their book, it's hard to put down, and it's also easy to read. Their book really is a story of redemption and proof that through Christ people can truly turn their life around for the better in spite of the circumstances under which they were raised.
This was a really good book, there were a couple times it would go from present time to a past memory and I would get confused when the present moment felt like it was not finished. Other than that! Loved! I actually attended your vow renewal. My husband and I were one of the YouTube fan basic guests. It’s inspiring to see y’all living in truth.
Embarrassingly enough I had been following Sam and Nia before the Ashley Madison news hit, so just like I couldn't resist watching the Netflix documentary, I couldn't resist reading their book. and it was okay. I really hope Sam has changed. and it did give me some insight into turning things over to God.
I watched the Netflix documentary and listened to the interview on Relatable. It’s so sad. And I know, it won’t be perfect, but it was sweet to hear their perspective in such a raw way. I can’t judge what their marriage is now, but their love of Jesus felt evident in the three ways I’ve listened to their story.
I’ve been following along with Sam and Nia’s vlogs since the very beginning. I’d be lying if I said what I learned wasn’t shocking, but this book is such a powerful testament to God’s redeeming love and forgiveness. I finished the book in 2 days!
After previously following this family on YouTube I was interested to read their story. Although the book has quite a bit of theological flaws it definitely told a story of the redemption in their marriage.
Wow. If you need marriage encouragement that is spiriaually based, this is it. If I was the one going through the things in this book, I'm not sure I would have the same ending... Captivating read and couldn't put it down. Read in less than 24 hours!
Love the story of redemption and giving all the glory to God. When I was younger, I used to watch their videos. I guess an original fan basic. There were a few typos in the last few chapters. But overall loved the story.
As someone that knows Nia personally, I needed to hear more from her about how all of Sam’s transgressions affected her and her family and how she decided to forgive him and stay in their marriage. I am happy to know how God is working this all out for their good and His glory!
Sam and Nia's story has encouraged me in the way they intended it to. What started out as a curiosity to know the tea lol, changed to a real challenge and encouragement to my faith to pursue God the way that they have.
So many Youtubers that I follow say they are writing a book, but Sam and Nia actually followed through with it!
I have been watching their daily vlogs since 2016. Watching their fun, creative antics and everyday family happenings got me through sleepless nights of stomach pain in college and young adulthood. I looked up to them as parents and spouses, always seeming to put their family first and create inspiring, innovative content.
With this kind of emotional attachment to their channel, I was ecstatic to see they had released a book a few weeks ago and immediately read it over a few days.
This book inspired me to take an honest look at my own life, and reinforced the freedom and blessings that come with owning up to one’s own sins and failings. I will appreciate Sam and Nia’s videos even more after receiving a window into their marial struggles and path to redemption. The insights they leave their readers with - mainly, that God wants to marry us - is a summation of the entire Gospel message, and I am thankful they got to this point through faithful prayer, discernment, and counsel.