God Didn't Make Us to Hate Us: 40 Devotions to Liberate Your Faith from Fear and Reconnect with Joy

by Lizzie McManus-Dail

A first-of-its-kind devotional for the disenchanted, disillusioned, and deconstructed

Countless Christians are deconstructing the fear-based faith they were handed, but many don’t want to give up on God—they want to love and be loved by Jesus without hateful or abusive theology. If you’re one of those believers, this feminist, anti-racist, LGBTQ-affirming devotional will take you on a journey of spiritual re-enchantment. Featuring 40 devotions on God’s radical and liberating salvation, it’s here to help you heal your church hurt, restore your sense of community, and embrace Jesus’s heart-healing forgiveness. Move beyond rigid religion and reconnect with the undeniable truth that predates and will outlive all the toxic theology in the God made you to love you.

Genres: Nonfiction, Faith, Religion, Christian, Christianity, Spirituality, Theology

240 pages, Kindle Edition

Published February 18, 2025

Reviews

[Maggie Burns · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a breath of fresh air.

[Renee · Rating 5 out of 5]

I started this book because I wanted to read it before gifting it to someone who is near and dear to me. I haven’t been apart of organized religion for well over 15+ years due to not agreeing with all the practices in Catholicism, and not really finding another that felt right. I like to read about other interpretations and viewpoints. This is the first book I felt a breath of fresh air. I felt it was solely rooted in seeing the love that is ment to be shared through, used for, and supporting every single person. I highly recommend this book if you’re on the edge of religion or have been burned by it. It really has healed some of the past issues I have had with it. It shows religion doesn’t have to be rooted in fear to have followers. It has brought some new light into how I view others and daily situations. It has restored some of my faith in me.

[Mattea Gernentz · Rating 4 out of 5]

December. I was sitting in the passenger seat of my dad's truck as we were driving homeward-bound after our family holiday at the beach. Repetitive miles of wetlands and asphalt and traffic lights. Billboards, too. One in particular made my stomach twist: "GO TO CHURCH OR GO TO HELL."

I spent my childhood surrounded by these signs, by this fear, by this common language. That billboard was not sharing news of divine love. It was only promoting legalism, avoidance, and terror.

I feel heartened that Rev. Lizzie's book exists as a healing balm of gentleness, pointing readers to the enduring faithfulness and creativity of God. I appreciated reading her perspectives as an Episcopal priest, mother, and fellow Southerner. She generously cites other believers and scholars, past and present, to enrich her chapters, and I find that referencing well and often is itself a form of love.

Sometimes the language was a little too on-the-nose or brimming with contemporary colloquialisms for me (e.g. "legit"), but I can sense that the heart of her message is very needed today and trust that this publication is going to impact many people—encouraging, transforming lives, and dissolving bitterness.

This would make a great addition to someone's Lenten routine, just saying. ;)

[Elizabeth Riley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is such a lovely book and I am so grateful for Rev. Lizzie for giving us this devotional! Her love for God and for the world shines through on every page. Lizzie not only gives us a beautiful theology but she does it with beautiful prose. I can't wait to use this in my congregation. Thank you so much to the publisher for providing me a copy.

[BespectacledBookGirl]

Finished in tears at near midnight while working in my kitchen. Hugs hugs hugs to Pastor Lizzie for this text ❣️

[Sydney Knight · Rating 3 out of 5]

some parts i couldnt get behind but some parts changed my brain

[Caitlin (CMAReads) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gave me lots to think about and will probably revisit again.

[Eden]

often feel like devotional books don't add anything more to my life than direct scripture reading, but this was so helpful. It wasn't trying to redefine the bible, it was trying to redefine our relationship to it. lots of solid takes, lots of biblical and historical evidence, lots of hope.

[Devin Snyder · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thought provoking and healing. Like chatting about life and faith with a fun and wise friend who challenges my thoughts and helps me think of a new perspective.

[annie littleson · Rating 5 out of 5]

“why would you believe in something awful when you could believe in something wonderful?” - the hot priest from fleabag

[Reevkah Hokanson · Rating 5 out of 5]

The feminist, liberal, lgbtq+ ally, Christian-raised sides of me are obsessed with this book. 🤩 ‘Beloved babe of God’, Reverand Lizzie, offers a breath of fresh air for those navigating the complexities of faith and identity. She dismantles harmful Christian myths, not by replacing them with rigid answers, but by inviting readers into the beauty of mystery.

Through 40 devotions, Rev. Lizzie teaches the stories of Jesus— making them resonate with contemporary life. She explores themes like the multifaceted nature of God beyond traditional gender roles, the Bible as a collection of human experiences rather than a strict rulebook, and the concept of salvation as a communal journey rather than an individual ticket to heaven.

I’m hoping that this book will be a great resource for my clients who are looking for a view of Christianity beyond the typical black & white narratives taught by their childhood religion(s). This book of devotionals is a compassionate companion on the path of finding joy in spirituality.

[Piper Hutchinson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I set myself on a Lenten task to come closer to God by unlearning the harmful Baptist teachings of my childhood. This book so delightfully guided me on that task. As my priest said this morning at Easter Mass, the resurrection takes us from solitude to solidarity. This book heavily emphasizes the solidarity that Christ teaches. It is quirky, queer-affirming and anti-racist. I highly recommend it as a Lenten read or as a tune up any time of year.

[Jenn | thezebrabookshelf · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful, reflective journey through the Bible and how a deconstructionist view can bring so much joy! Written with an accessible writing style that the reader can decide how topical or deep they can read into it. Addresses the hard, terrible stories in the Bible with a caring hand to guide you. Creates an inclusive environment for all gender and sexual identities.

[Carrie Woolley · Rating 2 out of 5]

A lot of theological stretches and shock value for the sake of making a point. a few nuggets of interesting insight here and there, though.

[Natasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m not usually a big fan of reading devotionals because they can feel really cheesy and like they’re meant to make the reader feel a certain way, rather than educating or inspiring the reader to take scripture and make it part of their day. This book was amazing. She consistently includes biblical/historical scholars who focus on marginalized points of view. Her inclusion of Black feminists, womanists, drag queens, and other voices that are typically left out of these (white) religious spaces was something I greatly appreciated. Each section had me wanting to learn more about the ways theology could be used to emphasize the message of love that is supposed to be at the core of Christianity, but is often omitted.

[Erica · Rating 5 out of 5]

My goodness was this powerful: healing, thought provoking, funny, insightful. I started following Rev. Lizzie on socials recently and then found her book. I’d love to own this because I definitely made enough notes to warrant my own physical copy to reference! Loved the prayers throughout, her references used, and so many beautiful theological points. Very grateful to have read this and would recommend to any Christian who is in the process of deconstructing faith or has felt isolated or hurt from their faith community in the past.

[Lily Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bite size sermons, bite size theology. I’m not quite the target audience for this book (having pretty much avoided religious trauma & certainly not raised in the harmful theology Father Lizzie is counterpointing) and I still found value in it. A few of her parallels were a stretch, but by and large I imagine this viewpoint is a needed oasis for many, and I’m thankful for Father Lizzie’s work here.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love, love, love this! I didn't necessarily agree with all her theology, but it is such an uplifting, affirmative look at God. God is expansive. I especially loved thinking about God in darkness. So interesting and different from how I usually think of God: doing all things in light.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reconnect with joy for sure! This was excellent, thought-provoking, and contemplative.

[Dani Brown · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5✨ I really enjoyed listening to the audiobook version. This devotional offered hope for the deconstructed, disillusioned and those otherwise grossed out by modern Christianity.

[Hannah Turner-Meade · Rating 4 out of 5]

and I’ve always said this!!!!!

[Luke Lindon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing read. Great theology. Wonderfully poetic work and vastly inspiring.

[Sean Wills · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best book I've read all year 🙏

[Steve · Rating 4 out of 5]

Audiobook.

I was drawn in by the title, and it didn't disappoint. Each chapter was like a sermon for which I would happily stay awake. Even the acknowledgements were worth listening to.

[Lorin Roemhildt · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ll talk about this book to everyone I know. It was the best Christmas gift I received last year! The author sees God the same way I do, a loving parent who would do anything for their children, and who loves them despite their mistakes and whatever makes them “different”. It was refreshing and heart warming and I hope to lend this to many people for years to come.

[Caity Cameron · Rating 5 out of 5]

What joy!

[Michael V · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overall a very bright read with moments of brilliance sprinkled throughout. Very much written for pronatalist women, with a strong emphasis on the experiences of pregnancy and motherhood. As such, it is by no means everyone's cup of tea. Still, it does provide insight into some interesting perspectives on Christianity.

[Johnathan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is both one of deconstruction and faith affirmation, two things that - despite what certain sects seem to think - are not always, and in fact, often arent, mutually exclusive. I've noticed that many books that set out to deconstruct bad, false, and hateful theology are written by people of faith or people who have made the study of faith part of their livelihood. So, basically what I'm saying is this can be a book for anyone. Believer, skeptic (again those two things aren't mutually exclusive, either), denier, or the merely curious.

My own background is someone who was raised in more evangelical and conservative doctrines of Christianity during childhood - lots of trauma. Around age 15 I dropped it, adorned the label agnostic and never looked back...until earlier this year at age 36. I can't explain what made me seek God because I'm not sure what it even was. Long story short is I'm a newly practicing and newly baptized Episcopalian.

I like Father Lizzie a lot from what I see of her on Instagram and the few times I've listened to her podcast (I need to catch up). She's got a great heart and her sermons are engaging and thought provoking. When I saw she had written a book I was curious if honestly slightly skeptical. She presents as very bubbly and positive, which of course is a good thing, but as more of an ardent leftist in recent years, if this had been too much a "slay queen yaass girlboss" mainstream liberal piece of work, it probably wouldn't have done much for me. I came here with a searching soul.

Having said that, God Didn't Make Us to Hate Us is an uplifting book but it's not a lightweight book. Sometimes it's a pretty heavy book. 40 devotions, each with a closing prayer. What Lizzie is able to do that's pretty remarkable is get into some pretty deep and serious theology in a brisk and accessible manner and get her points across in a way that is both cerebral and moving. Firm yet convincing.

After all, this is a book about God's love for us, and it is clearly written by someone who has studied, searched for, struggled with, lost, found, delighted in, mourned in, and preached in that love.

What this book has done for me has help disabuse me of some old ingrained harmful thinking; when I left religion as a teenager, I never "deconstructed" so much as just dropped it like a hot pan and ran for my life. The Episcopal church is notably positive and loving in its message - the joke "the only thing burning is the candles" comes to mind - so I picked a good place to be, but old habits die hard. I think I still have a ways to go in totally ridding myself of those childhood shackles, but the work I'm doing now, which includes reading this book, is a pretty good start.

[Olivia Gerakios · Rating 5 out of 5]

as someone who was raised Catholic- I have been struggling with my faith and religion for the past decade or so. after the death of my grandmother, father, childhood dogs, etc all in the span of 5 years, I started questioning how a loving God could put me through such pain and sorrow so early into my life. then I got cancer, and wondered why a God I believed so deeply in would put me through such a difficult trial in life. regardless of my own trials and tribulations, the God I was raised with was a LOVING God. one that did not discriminate, did not hate, did not punish, and did not weaponize the idea of faith or religion. being exposed to different people with different ideologies and upbringings of my own exposed me to the weaponization, politicization, and manipulation that some people use religion as in order to validate their own beliefs, hateful or not.

media and politicians as of recently especially have taken religion and spinned the ideals I believed in so greatly as a child, the ones that made me the person I am today, and turned them ugly, unkind, and unforgiving. this is not the God I know. this is not the faith that I know. this book was like coming up for fresh air. this book was a reminder of who I KNOW God to be. of what I KNOW my religion and faith and relationship with God to be like. for so long I was ashamed to associate myself as a follower of Christ or a believer in God because of the foul and horrific and HATEFULNESS white "Christians" preach, and this book reminded me that if I forget who I am and where my faith is rooted in, I am contributing to the attack on the God I know and love.
Reverend Lizzie McManus-Dail did what I have so longed to do, which is read the Bible and reconnect it to modern day, in order to remind those who claim to follow God, but only when it is convenient for them, the stories they have long forgotten, or otherwise chose to entirely disregard because it did not fit the narrative of the "God" they created in their head.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from this book.

"The cross has been transformed into a harmless, non-offensive ornament that Christians wear around their necks..... If we wear a weapon, it should be to say that death has lost its sting. We should not wear a cross necklace or have a cross tattoo of the weapon that killed Jesus, as a weapon to yield against other people."

"Jesus was lynched in the sense that historically, Jesus' death mirrors the lynchings of black people, other people of color, and perceived dissidence across America. It was an unjust, mob mentality driven, extralegal killing, carried out under the boot of empire."

"Jesus was lynched in the sense that, whenever a member of the body of Christ dies an unjust, brutal death, this pain is being inflicted in and on Christ."

"So much of colonialist Christian thinking took imagery of light, and read it as white. white supremacy, and the brutalizing subjugation of indignation of indigenous people and cultures in the name of sanctification is a sin against God and one another."

"Children and their caregivers who have to cross rivers seeking safety are blessed by God, who also was an infant refugee and immigrant."

[Haley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was my Lenten devotional that I finished early because I could not stop reading it. A devotional that is a page-turner—who would have thought? That's how good it is!!!!!!

I joined the Episcopal Church in 2022. Some time in 2023, I saw Fr. Lizzie twirling in her sparkly chasuble on TikTok and thought to myself, I would be best friends with that woman if I knew her in real life. I listened to every single episode of And Also With You. And when this book finally came out, I promised myself I would save it for Lent and use it as a true devotional, and not speed through it. Which I did... until today.

This is a tender love letter to everyone who comes from a faith tradition rooted in fear. Have you ever stood in the middle of a blooming field, where all you can see in all directions is more fields, and the blinding blue of the sky above you? That's what it feels like to read this. This is God and Christian community at their most expansive. It is colorful and all-encompassing. It cannot be defined—it's just too large and gorgeous. But we look anyway, because to catch even a tiny glimpse of our God is worth the searching.

Importantly, this book does not put forward a faith that ignores darkness, or sin, or suffering. Fr. Lizzie identifies all that, sits with it, and tells us, Our God has conquered all that. And God is sitting right here with us. She reminds us all that people who consider themselves Biblical fundamentalists, or textualists, or whatever they're calling themselves nowadays do not have final dibs on our Scripture. It's ours, all of humanity's, for anyone who wants it. We are reading it through the lens that our loving, liberating God has given us, using our reason and experience.

The Bible is messy! Our lives are messy! Our Scripture mirrors us. The Bible is not some easily understood life manual. It is thousands of years of drama and murder and love and light and darkness. Do we think our God is too small, so tiny that we can put Her in a box, taken out when convenient? Fr. Lizzie doesn't think so. And that reality shines throughout her wonderful debut book.

I will likely reread this for Lent next year. This is worth the investment, because you will be coming back to these beautiful words over and over. My favorite chapters: God is More Like Music; Hagar, the Enslaved Woman Who Named God; The Brutality of Mercy; The Tenacity of a Bleeding Woman; A God You Can Kick in the Shins; Things We Cannot Heal; The Great Vigil of Easter