Misdirected is the story of fifteen-year-old Ben, who moves to a small conservative Colorado town where his atheism seems to be the only thing about him that matters to everyone. His classmates bully him for not fitting in, his teachers don’t understand him, and with his brother serving in Iraq and his sister away at college with problems of her own, Ben is left on his own to figure things out. Being a teen is tricky to navigate when you’re an outsider, and Ben struggles to find his place without compromising who he is. He rebels against his teachers, he argues with his classmates, and he rejects what others believe, bringing the reader with him on his enlightening journey as he learns the value of challenging accepted beliefs—including his own.
Ali Berman is the author of Choosing a Good Life: Lessons from People Who Have Found Their Place in the World, published by Hazelden Publishing, and Misdirected, published by Triangle Square, an imprint of Seven Stories Press. Her writing has appeared in Unsaid Literary Journal, Elimae, Used Furniture Review and Puerto del Sol among others.
In 2012 she co-founded flipmeover, a production company that uses media to raise awareness about important social issues. Ali cowrote “quiet de luxe”, their debut short film that has played in film fests around the world.
When not devoting her time to her writing, Ali works as a humane educator for HEART, teaching children about issues affecting people, animals and the environment.
She resides in Portland, Oregon with her husband and two cats.
Misdirected is the story of Ben, a fifteen year-old teen whose life is about to change as his family moves to a small town in Colorado. Leaving old friends behind and transferring to a new school is never easy but it is way more complicated when you are forced to go to a Christian school when you are an atheist.
Ben thought that he'd be fine since he used to go to a Catholic school where his choices were respected. He did not know that this new school is way more conservative and strictly complies with their religion. Suddenly, Ben found himself the center of unwanted attention, with his classmates and schoolmates throwing insults and tormenting him due to his different belief.
As an outcast, Ben struggles to find the strength to uphold his own belief without condescending the people around him. He strives to make people understand him and somehow be accepted without losing himself in the process.
This is a journey where he will learn to stick by his choices and at the same time accept, understand, learn from and respect the belief of others around him.
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I have been looking so long for a book that I could tell people to read so that they can understand my belief better. And at long last, I found it! I have never needed a book so bad.
First off, I'd like to clear things up a bit. I am an atheist. I used to be a Roman Catholic since I was baptized as one a few months after I was born. When I was in high school, I was already struggling with the religion I'm in and that's when I opted out. I have been an atheist for almost 7 years now. Do not get me wrong, I do not hate every Catholic or other religious people. I respect their belief and I have nothing against it. My only problem comes when some of them force their belief on me, trying to convert me, telling me that my choice is an abomination and that I am a sinner because of it. I have a problem with those who use religion to inflict harm on others or use the word of their god to back up their hate and bigotry. That's what I cannot accept.
And so I'd like to start by warning very devout Christians of this book. I can see why they might have a problem with the story. Yes, the portrayal of Christians in the book may not totally encompass all of them. Some might find it offensive, even. Some may say that it's false representation. But you see, you have to understand that in this story, we are shown the worst kinds of Christians. The book did not, in any way, generalize them all as bullies, bigots, and intolerant. It was clearly stated numerous times in the book that other Christians do not act as badly as the students in the story. The book tells us that some of these religious people exist, but it does not represent all of them.The books shows us that there are both good and bad in any religion or any belief system.
Now that that's out of the way, let's talk about the story more. I love Ben. I haven't encountered a lot of characters I could relate to in terms of religious belief and so I was so glad I read about Ben. He's an atheist. He found it difficult to accept certain things about Christianity. He asks the same questions I ask about life. He was ostracized because of his belief, and I deeply connected with him because of that. But I really like how he was written. He knows his belief and he knows that he is suffering because of it but he stood strong. At some point, he became so mad and angry at how his classmates were judging him and yet, he was able to see the wrong in his actions. In this book, we see him grow as a person. First, he was adamant in not accepting Christianity. But then slowly, without having to pull away from his own belief, he started seeing why people can be so dependent on their faith. He sees its importance on people's life. And that was how he was able to respect it even when he doesn't completely agree with it as a whole.
And that's one thing I commend about the author. She was able to give us lessons about acceptance and respect of differences between people without having to change the nature of the person. I have read other books with atheist characters but usually, they end up converting to another religion and 'finding the light' so they can understand it better. It's refreshing to see a different kind of enlightening, one in which the person doesn't have to shave off a bit of his personality.
Another thing I deeply enjoyed reading about in this book is the relationship between Ben's family. To me, it's the picture of a family that I wanted. His parents were so supportive of him. They trust him enough to let him choose his own belief. They treated him as a person even if he's just a teenager. They can have proper and honest conversations without fear of being judged and scolded. Nowadays, it's hard to find parents like that. I especially love the Dad. I loved how he reacted when Ben's older sister came out as gay. At first, I thought he would be disappointed or mad. But then I was wrong. He reacted badly not because of his daughter's preference but because he was afraid of how the people my treat her because of it and that he might not be able to protect her from those people. I mean, is there any better reaction than that?
Another thing I like in this book is that even though it was told from an atheist perspective, both sides of the coin were shown. In one side, we get to see how Ben's mind works, how he understand the world around him. We see the sentiments of most atheist regarding their opinion on how things work. And on the other side, through Ben's friends, we see how religious people see the world in their eyes. The book was written in a way where we can both understand these two contrasting ideas with forcing one over the other. And it was really important for me to have read a book like that.
Aside from religion and belief, this book also tackles issues such as homosexuality, veganism, war, the life of soldiers, and friendship. It was really really good! After finishing it, I just wanted to shove the book down every bigoted, homophobic, intolerant and hateful religious' throat. I swear, they need to learn to listen to the minority's side for once and see how difficult it is to be judge just because of stupid differences.
Overall, this book is now part of the most influential and life-changing book for me. I certainly, without a doubt, give it a full 5/5.
Ben moves with his family to Colorado from Boston because of his mothers new job. He isn't thrilled to move and leave his friends but feels prepared to go to a new religious private school as he's leaving one. He's an atheist who now must navigate a religious curriculum that includes creationism and a "saved" student population. He quickly learns he is not prepared!
This is a Goodreads win. I really like this one! I've read some reviews that accuse this book of religion bashing. I completely disagree and see this as a story of redemption and accepting all for who hey are without judgement.
When Ben moves to a small conservative town in Colorado, his first mission is to make friends. His nonexistent religious affiliations cause a hitch in his plan. Now it seems like everyone’s mission is to get him “saved.” All Ben wants is to be himself, but he can’t seem to stop butting heads with everyone else’s beliefs.
I was hoping for this to be a title I could add to my collection for those who might not subscribe to the religious social norms of our community. While it was interesting to look at some of the everyday conversation I hear through the eyes of a character with no allegiances or foundations in Christianity, the book came off preachy. It was like the author made a list of all the issues on which she disagrees with fundamentalist Christians and made sure to hit every point. She might have succeeded in that, but she completely neglected to develop her characters and plot. The dialogue felt too scripted and unnatural. It was a device to move the story where the author wanted it to go instead of the characters’ voices.
I also think there were times with the Christians in the book are portrayed to the point that Christian readers may feel attacked or misrepresented. This is not to say that Christians like those portrayed in the book don’t exist; they most certainly do. It just seemed like a narrow view of Christianity that left a bitter taste in my mouth. That said, this might be really relatable for those who didn’t grow up in predominantly Christian communities or who have little to no experience with Christianity and Christian fundamentalism.
That all sounds really negative. I apologize for my tendency toward bluntness. I do think this book had a lot of potential. I will be on the look out for more by this author in the future because I believe she has interesting things to say. This just won’t be a pick for my library.
AUDIENCE: 13+
This is definitely appropriate for readers thirteen and above.
BEYOND THE BOOK
I want to take a moment to unpack my own background with this topic because I think it is an important part of how the reader experiences this book. I have no doubt that it guided my own feelings about the book. I do not consider myself religious in the traditional sense. However, I was raised Southern Baptist. My father was a baptist preacher, and I went to church pretty much every Sunday until I went to college. It’s really hard to shake everything I was taught growing up, and I would never want to do that. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without the childhood I had. I think my background and current beliefs on religion helped me remain sensitive to both sides. I looked over some other reviews to see how people were reacting to this book, and no one mentioned the way the Christians in the community were portrayed. Perhaps my reactions to that part of the book come from a foundation of bias. I think I was really just hoping for a book about a kid exploring the possibility of being atheist, and ended up with a little more attempted conversion that I would have liked.
This book is about Ben a fifteen year old who is moved from Boston to Colorado. Not only is he having to leave his friends behind, and start over at a new Christian private school, the entire small town is religious. The problem: he and his family are atheist. He went to a Catholic school in Boston, but it was more liberal and taught facts not just ideals based on the bible. Normally it wouldn't be a big deal that Ben is atheist, because it is no one else's business, but in this tiny town, people make it their business, and Ben not only doesn't have friends in school, he is openly harassed. The book shows that there are good and bad people in all religions, because there are just good and bad people, religion is often just used as a justification. I was a little scared that he was going to eventually "be saved" and then I wouldn't have liked this book at all, but he stays true to who he is and what he believes through everything. You might think that this is just a book pro atheism or Christian bashing but it really isn't. This book was great. Definitely worth a read.
Well... This book was interesting, out of my league, and something I would not catch myself reading. This book to be honest, if it wasn't for me winning the giveaway for it, I wouldn't have even layed my eyes on it. (I'm just saying...
This book got really messy... There's 3 sides here, there's God, faith, and hate. Which side are you? If you want to know... Read this book. It changes your views of the world alittle bit. (I just sounded deep there for a second xD) but yeah... Basically that's how the book went for me.
Don't judge this book by it's cover, it's pretty good, and that cover doesn't express the book as it should be. So yup. Read it ;)
As a non-religious person, I was so excited to read Misdirected by Ali Berman when I picked it up at a bookstore as a young teenager. While I never got around to reading it while in high school, I decided to pick it up this summer as an easier fiction read. I was really excited about the book's theme surrounding religion and not fitting in because of it; this was a unique topic and one that I was very interested in reading about. While I loved the messages about fostering inclusivity and understanding from both sides of the religious/non-religious isle, I felt that religion was all the book was about (and of course, romance). I would have liked the main character Ben to talk about something else other than his religious nonconformity and his failing romantic relationship. When he was talking about other things like James' home situation and his brother Pete's military service (both great themes!) it seemed disconnected and forced. I also found Ben to be an over-complainer who, however terrible his situation was, would rather become the victim instead of rising up and learning to understand others as well. Overall, I enjoyed the deep themes like religion, war, and alcoholism that this book touched on, but I just expected a little bit more.
If I had found this book as a young teen it would have been a 5star review. Our main character who is an East Coast atheist moves to a small town in Colorado and is sent to a Christian private school and immediately gets judged and bullied because of who he is. As a gay kid growing up in small town Idaho I can relate far too well. I think the differing beliefs and the angst are well handled and there were several good lessons about tolerance for both sides. There’s a lot more to the story than that but it was all well balanced with humor and heart.
This was an interesting book and it had creative things coming from the left and right. this was a good book and I would recommend it to some people. I liked it an I think you would like it to.
Loved the main character - totally connected with him and I loved that. However, the romance was entirely unbelieveable and unnecessary. Great story, though!
Misdirected touches on the extremely sensitive subject of religion and mainly about the co-existence of people with different faiths together. Ben is a high school student who has to leave behind his friends Margaret and Seth to go to another town where his mother has accepted a new job. He arrives in a new private school and quickly learns from his neighbour Tess that this school (and town) are incredibly religious. They incorporate Christianity into their school environment along with their teachings such as teaching creationism instead of evolution in Science. This proves to be a problem for Ben, who is an atheist, and he quickly learns that there is no place for him in a Christian school like this.
I have not identified with a character like Ben in any of the books I have read this year. Ben's experiences with religion and mainly Christianity draw many parallels in my own personal life so it may be bias that is coming into play here in my review. Nonetheless, Ali Berman has written a story that is so realistic and does not shy away from grey areas in religion. The characters give their own views towards religion such as Ben and his friend James, the only other non-believer in the school, for atheism and Tess for Christianity. The romantic relationship between Ben and Tess further serves to complicate things, posing the question whether two such fundamentally different beliefs can survive together.
Berman does a great job in making her characters three-dimensional, along with creating a spectrum of different degrees of religiousness in them. There are extremely intolerant characters like Ben's science teacher who fails him for refusing to acknowledge creationism as the truth. There are characters like Tess who interpret the Bible in their own way. She is still religious but believes that homosexuality is not a sin and is still open-minded enough to become (more than) friends with those of other religions. There is also James who has a religious mother but he himself is not and finally there is Ben, who at first tries his best to be tolerant but after everything becomes too much, he snaps and delivers some fiery hateful speech to his schoolmates. Berman does a good job at pointing out the hypocrisy of each side as well, how their views tend to only align with their arguments when they want them to. It's easy to feel sympathetic for Ben and feel so infuriated by the school's treatment of him but there is a moment in the book when Ben's father confronts the principal about his F grade for Science. The principal compares the teaching of evolution in public schools as being intolerant to their beliefs, similar to how the school rejects evolution in line with their beliefs. It is actually a valid point in a way and one which I did not think about. It kind of opened my mind more towards views from the other side.
Overall, this book was great in the way it approached religion and the depth of its discussion. The characters were likable and their stories all intertwined nicely with the topics of tolerance discussed. It was really identifiable for someone like me and it was a book I really enjoyed. 4/5
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Good message with mediocre writing--though, I must say, given the subject matter, I think it would be hard to write something truly complex. It's a message well worth pondering, especially as I have been more or less in Ben's place. In fact, I spent most of high school in a similar place, lacking the "Christian" educational environment.
I'm very on the fence about this book. The movie "Saved" was funnier and got the message across, but landed heavily on the side of the Christians being more judgy-bear and the less religious people being in the right. This author takes an extremely balanced viewpoint, noting that the so-called nonjudgmental liberals are judging Christianity as "wrong" or "unfounded in science" just by disagreeing with it, and thus are not without blame. The point that, by judging anyone as wrong, you may hurt them, is worth taking.
I spent most of my educational years in a group of lovely friends who believed in a more conservative religion than I did at the time. They did some cruel things in high school, some intentionally and some unintentionally, that took me a very long time to forgive. I'm not sure the damage done to my opinion of conservative Christianity as a religion, by their actions, will ever be undone, but it might be just as well that I experienced the reality of how some people choose to interpret Christianity. There are wild things done, believed, and said in the name of religion or in the name of anti-religion, but in the end a religion (or lack thereof) is just dogma, and it's how you interpret it that is your choice.
The book felt a little preachy about always always always taking the high road, which is as high a standard as always being Christlike in your actions. Thankfully, it had some amazingly forgiving characters. The author also managed to put in some preachiness, whilst clearly trying hard to stay her own hand, about veganism, which...sheesh. I don't care to be preached to. I would give this book two stars, except I feel the message about kindness and tolerance (which...apparently I missed, since I'm writing this review that is not 100% complimentary, though I am trying to be fair) is an excellent one.
No cover available. At least as of October 18, 2014.
Misdirected is most certainly an interesting book, interesting novel. It may be short, but it definitely does get messy. There is God, there is faith, and there is hate. All those mixtures make a very messy, messy book.
(Out of curiosity, is the church in Misdirected called Westboro Baptist Church? Kind of sounds like them, but I'm not quite sure. At least, they aren't calling anyone anti-christ, but there are some terrible words involved).
Ben, as the main character, is flawed, but he seems very real. Very 3D. He isn't angry (unless provoked), and he is much more accepting. Think him as a soldier in the war of atheists and believers. Faith is always something very touchy and sensitive. Ben is an unbeliever, and no, he doesn't get converted. He firmly believes in science and the hard facts, and he thinks the religious text to be fiction.
But the point is that he is a really good mirror. He draws parallels between himself and the readers. And so does his girlfriend, Tess. She is a believer, yes, but she isn't as... crazy as the rest of the group in her church.
And the book touches real-life situations very well, too. I enjoyed it very much, and it is quite fascinating to see the prejudices and beliefs at work. It is all very complicated, with so many colors and layers.
Overall, Misdirected is a great book. It isn't very hilarious or amusing, but it does get very sensitive and hits the more... sensitive topics. (Wow, I got a bit redundant on that part). There are great characters, though some aspects of the book seem a bit off-topic. But after thinking a bit, I consider Misdirected to be a questioning book with great parts and features and edges.
I received a digital copy of this title from the publisher via Edelweiss.
Ten Second Synopsis: Ben, on moving to a small conservative town, discovers he's an atheist. When his Christian classmates find out, life becomes a whole lot harder for Ben.
This is a highly engaging and thought-provoking read that really gets to the heart of freedom of religion and the impact that this has on how people behave. Ben is a fleshed-out character who is portrayed as a normal everyday kid who has been prompted to evaluate what it is he actually believes when he finds himself in an unexpected situation. The other characters in the book also have strong back-stories and all the characters that pop up in the story – adults and teens and in-betweens – have believable flaws and blind spots that drive their behaviour.
As well as the main plotline about religious belief (or lack of it), the story also covers issues of alcoholism, friendship challenges, homosexuality, grief and loss, and the impact of war on returned soldiers. And then there’s Ben’s skills as a magician.
I got sucked into this one very quickly and read it compulsively to the end. There were a few little niggles that I experienced with the plot points – would such open-minded parents as Ben’s, who seem to promote and encourage independent thought in their offspring really send their child to a school that teaches Creationism as scientific fact, for instance – but I was able to get over these pretty quickly, as Berman does a wonderful job of developing all the hanging plot points and tying up the loose ends. I would highly recommend this readers of YA who like to be challenged and who are looking for something with a different twist on the starting-a-new-school story.
This book follows an atheist teen who moves to a small town of Colorado full of Baptist Bible Thumpers. Here, he meets a girl named Tess and falls in love along with learning a few lessons about respect for others religions as well as your own. My favorite character was Tess being as sweet as she is and the main protagonist’s love interest even though I do not agree with how she treated Ben for some parts. My favorite scene is when Ben was taken to a “mega church” for the first time, I love his descriptions of the place and laugh about my own experiences with churches that size. I warn all who are looking for a nice, simplistic afternoon joy read, for this is not such book. This book made me think thoughtfully about hypocrisy in the Christian church and lead me to sometimes heartbreak for Ben with my own experiences; however, not ALL Baptist Christians are that judgmental and hypocritical as those written about in the fictitious Colorado town (For example, the science teacher once tried to fail the main character in the class just because he believed in evolution). While Tess is supposed to represent a “new generation” of Christians who are nonjudgmental, I believe people can believe whole heartedly in Christianity but still respect other religions unlike Tess who while Christian, thinks any person good or bad can have eternal life in Heaven which is a direct contradiction to the Christian faith…(makes her a kind of shaky example of a Christian). Now saying this book made me think is not a criticism. In fact, I rather enjoyed the quirky humor and deep pondering aspect of the novel. However, this is not one of my favorite novels for its brevity and at some points repetition of situations especially in a book so short.
Ben is a teenage boy who moved to a small town in Colorado from Massachusetts. He's considered an atheist by all the kids in his new very religious Christian private school and quickly becomes hated by all.
Except for Tess, his next door neighbor, and James, a fellow "atheist.
Tess's family is one of the extremely Christian families who believe that anyone who isn't Christian will go to hell. "Christians" who don't believe in what they do might as well go down there when they die. Despite her family's prejudice, Tess is open-minded and forms a secret friendship with Ben which turns into something more.
James was raised as a Christian but doesn't quite believe in God anymore because of his mother. She's an alcoholic and has been in rehab numerous times. Why didn't God help her? She's a Christian.
To his credit, Ben at first doesn't re-act much or blow up from the mounting religious pressure. He does have a turning point when he starts thinking that all Christians are very judgmental; ultimately even including Tess.
Misdirected: A Novel is a novel that really made be think and reflect on myself. I am a Christian myself and I was horrified at the attitudes of the actions against Ben. Misdirected: A Novel also shared with me the pain of being different.
Overall, my final note is: JUST PICK THIS BOOK UP AND START READING. It's just too good to pass up. Full of quirky characters, and spiteful ones too.
"Misdirected" was a fast paced and enjoyable read. As someone from Massachusetts who was not raised in a religious household, I could relate to Ben. Although I grew up in a small conservative town so people did tease me because of it, but no where near what Ben faces in the book.
I liked that the characters weren't static, they were human beings that would make mistakes and many tried to grow from them. I was a bit worried that the book was headed in an antireligious direction at the beginning, but by the end it felt completely different. I was really impressed with how "Misdirected" handled the issue of religion in our country; it is a polarizing issue that can't be ignored. This book could help facilitate some wonderful discussions on the topic. I really liked how the book ended. It was hopeful without having that afternoon TV special feeling.
I just realized that some of what I just said might have made the book sound boring, but it isn't! Even if you don't want to read about religious differences, there are plenty of classic teen moments! Ben has his first kiss, people are sneaking out of their houses, there is bullying, first day at a new school jitters and family drama; "Misdirected" even has magic! I will say that the magic was probably what I liked least out of this book, but at least it made Ben unique. I appreciated his passion for it in the end.
Bottom line, interesting book with great characters that tackles a timely topic without slowing down the plot. I definitely recommend it.
I absolutely loved the opportunity to be a first reader, and I'm always excited about the careers of new authors. Ali Berman addresses important themes for young adults in her novel: bullying, acceptance, and religion. The pacing was appropriate, and I liked the hero's journey structure; all the characters were redeeming in the end.
That said, I feel like the book needed a bit more depth. I feel like the themes became so important that the writing became repetitive and didactic, and the character development was lost. The dialogue did what it was supposed to do--it moved the story forward. Unfortunately, it seemed inauthentic--stilted in places, prescribed in others. The characters became one-dimensional as a result.
There were sparks of humor where I laughed aloud, and there were moments where I thought, "Yes, Berman! More of that!"
In the end, I think young readers will enjoy the book more than I did. They will enjoy the love story and the conflicts at school. I look forward to more books by Berman. I think she has great ideas for the kinds of books that young adults enjoy.
Absolutely phonominal book. The story of Ben is just amazing! Having to deal with moving to a new town and leave his friends behind is one thing but entering into a town that is all Christian is another. Especially when he is an "athiest". Journey with Ben while he starts a new school, tries to make new friends and stick to his beliefs while trying to cope and understand the believe of others. Will he stay true to his own beloefs or will he give in, forget about being different, and be saved? This book is NOT just about religion but its about the daily struggles of a teen trying to fit in, following his own beliefs and values while trying to respect others, dealing with bullying and ultimately finding out who he really is. A MUST READ FOR EVERYONE!!!!!!
Ben is the main character of this book. After moving away from his friends and his family he is faced with what religion means to him or a lack there of. Ben shows us a side we don't often think about. A side that examines religion and what being an atheist really means. We see Ben struggle through bullying, intolerance and family issues. It really made me see things from a different perspective. One that opens up a world of understanding rather then intolerance. The novel flowed very well was beautifully written and presented us with many themes and lessons. I would recommend this book. I would give it a 4 out of 5. I received the book for free through Goodreads First Reads.
I received this book through a Goodreads first reads giveaway....
I absolutely loved this book and its message!! This book helped me to realize that all people matter no matter what religion or beliefs. You should always respect other peoples beliefs. I would love to read more about Ben in the future. Maybe when his brother comes home for good and opens his animal shelter! This is a must read!!
I think this book could have been very interesting and a really good read. But I felt like it went to far into what felt like stereotypical all Christians are horrible and judgy that what could have been a good story/message was completely lost.
*I received this book for free through the Good Reads First Reads program.
More message than story. I can't disagree with the message that your actions make you a good/bad person rather than your beliefs, and I applaud the author for writing a sympathetic atheist character in a YA novel--not to mention taking on the complex topic of religious tolerance. But it was just okay.
Ms. Berman does a deft job of describing zealots and haters- as well as having her characters do some great self-reflection. Not enough books out there about atheists and Christians and how they can or can't get along. A wonderful page-turner that will have you reflecting on religion, alcoholism, gay rights, and your own beliefs. Very realistically written. I LOVED this book.
This book is better than I thought it would be. I was surprised at the descriptions of the school Ben (the main character) attends and asked myself and family questions that I never thought i would think about. This book prompted me to think about life and religion in a way I haven't before. It was an excellent read.
Overall, it was pretty good though maybe not as effective as it could have been. The author dealt with a lot of issues including homosexuality, war, faith, and alcoholism. Some story lines were more developed than others in my opinion. I found the chapters with Pete very compelling, particularly the funeral they attend.
A high school atheist relocates to a very strong Christian community and falls in love with a girl who questions her own faith. Will their love prevail or will the community standards be much too much to bear.
I absolutely LOVED this book. It covered so many important issues - but on top of that, it was a real page turner. Ali captured the feelings, fears and joys of being an adolescent so perfectly. I recommend this book to anyone who wants to celebrate being different - with love.