Books about grief over a loved one always hit hard for me. I seek them out like a parched shipwreck survivor seeking fresh water.
So when this book was presented to me, and against my better judgment because I do not read cartoon cover books, the blurb immediately hooked me in.
A woman losing her husband suddenly after 18 years of marriage of love leaving her a single mother with two children? Immediate read
and to be honest, I plowed through the beginning of the book because the story was flowing with a "PS. I Love You" kind of vibe. But an eerie feeling was creeping on me not knowing what it was until I reached the 55% mark.
I DID NOT LIKE THE MAIN LEADS AT ALL.
⚜ rating: 2 🌟🌟
⚜Genre: Drama Romance
⚜Theme: Grief/ Second-Chance Romance
⚜Targeted audience: Adults
⚜Characters: Lizzie (Elizabeth), Bryan, Lyle
⚜Side Characters: the kids Lil and Milo, the sister Elle
⚜Representation: mental disorder
⚜Pace: medium
⚜TW: death of a loved one, depression, self-harm, abandonment, Bullying, pregnancy loss
⚜ tropes: friends to lovers (double ones), small-town romance
⚜ POV: Double first person
⚜ spice 🌶🌶 🌶
⚜standalone: yes
⚜Ending: HEA
After 18 years of marriage and 20 years being together, beloved and extraordinary husband Lyle suddenly dies in his sleep leaving already troubled Lizzie to deal alone with two kids. She, after 2 months, decides to go back to her old town, the one she and her husband swore would never come back to, and stay with her sister because of financial obligations. There, she is reunited with Bryan, her childhood best friend who cut ties with her when she got married to Lyle.
Lizzie has to deal with not only the grief of losing her husband and his ghost haunting her, figuratively, dealing with her two kids adjusting to the new life she thrust them in, but also her rekindled feelings for her childhood best friend.
We also have Bryan, on the other hand, trying desperately to gain Lizzie's love because he has been in love with her all his life. A love so great that it consumed him even when he was betrothed to someone else.
Here is what went wrong for me.
I practically Know nothing about Lizzie.
She was a rebel in school... why? how? what did she do? we don't know
She suffered from deep depression that pushed her to cut herself... why? what happened? other than she had a shaky relationship with her mother (who doesn't!!) nothing is said about this subject.
I understood the panic attacks after Lyle's death but why was she having panic attacks in highschool? and why wasn't Lyle who noticed them and not Bryan????
When she came back, Bryan immediately gave her a job as a mechanic because she is apparently a good one. When did she learn that??? she left after high school and never worked. She was a stay-at-home mom for 20 years! you mean to tell me that she learned to be a mechanic at school, stayed unemployed for 20 years, came back and suddenly she is good with modern cars????
She was not popular at school, a rebel apparently, but she manages to catch the eye of the golden good boy Lyle who goes all his way for her. At the same time, her best friend is also in love with her!!
My problem is we did not get much of her as flashbacks with Lyle or Brayn to see said GREAT LOVE blossoming!! We got a lot of Bryan/Lyle flashbacks though!
Something happens in their town that made them leave quickly, elope, and build a life away cutting ties with all their families. What happened??? I know Lyle's family did not approve of Lizzie but to cut ties with everyone! ok, no problem I can go with that! But you and your husband swore to never return but your first coherent thought after his death is I am going back to the horrible place with MY KIDS! especially after your mother-in-law was shouting at you at the funeral how you were the reason for killing her son!! Yeah, your kids are not getting bullied at all!!!
Her interaction with her kids felt lacking, every time one of them got in trouble it was Bryan to the rescue.
Lizzie was griefing, she was hallucinating her dead husband whom she deeply, truly loved but the minute her best friend confessed his love she was quick to say "I love you too" and jump into his bed because "seven months" was too long to remain celibate???????
Bryan was a decent man. He loved Lizzie so much but did not tell her until someone else snatched her away. She broke his heart when she married their friend but instead of being there for her he cowardly said to her choose either marry him or stay friends with me!!!! She marries Lyle so Bryan joins the military where he meets Sam who reminds him of Lizzie so why not marry her instead? Sadly Sam dies under fire, and Brayn is traumatized for over 8 years over a relationship that lasted months!! Meanwhile, he was getting these emails from Lyle for YEARS! FREAKING YEARS! and did not read them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I did not see this book as dealing with grief tbh. I saw it as dealing with guilt over getting over your long love quickly.
I think both Lizzie and Bry chose the other because they thought they couldn't have each other. And isn't it convenient that both of their loves died????
I thought the "Sam" plot was unnecessary
I thought the "Lyle's old friend turned bully" unnecessary
I feel so sorry for Lyle, If I were given free reign, I would make Lizzie die, Lyle comes back to reconnect with his parents, form a friendship with Elle (cause she was so much better than Lizzie) and they fall in love.
some timelines felt odd at certain points
I loved the side characters more than the main ones
I loved the kids
the spice scenes were very good
I see potential with the author for future books. I was given this ARC in exchange for an honest review and this was it.