Growing Self-Compassionate Children: A Family Guide for Nurturing Resiliency and Kindness

by Wendy O'Leary, Louise Shanagher

Integrating self-compassion practice into family life is a profound gift that parents can give to their children and to themselves.

Here you will learn how to make self-compassion an active practice for the whole family—with over 70 activities, crafts, meditations, and games.

Self-compassion—being kind to yourself when things are hard—is a valuable quality for parents to model and to cultivate in their children—and studies show that it also builds emotional resilience.

This guide for parents explains the benefits of teaching children about self-compassion, and it offers advice, encouragement, and practices to enrich family life. Wendy O’Leary and Louise Shanagher, who have an extensive background and expertise in mindfulness, children’s education, and psychology, introduce the basic concepts of self-compassion, along with the benefits and the research that supports the practice.

In communicating self-compassion to children, the authors emphasize the importance of focusing on a child’s inherent value rather than on their external achievements and specify the benefits of “self-compassion” over “self-esteem.” Crucially, they show us that self-compassion also includes an embodied, felt sense of deep care and love for ourselves.

Genres: Parenting

168 pages, Paperback

Published March 11, 2025

Reviews

[Efrat Shokef · Rating 5 out of 5]

Growing Self-Compassionate Children by Wendy O’Leary and Louise Shanagher is a beautiful tapestry and invitation. An invitation to first become self-compassionate to ourselves, and through our example, guide our children to the same.

I found myself reading every page, every line, and every sentence, and although I thought I was familiar with the topic, I still learned so much. The book is filled with so many ideas, examples, and exercises. Not only in the designated sections, but also in between stories and theoretical explanations.

More than the words, every time I opened the book, I felt a delicate wave of love embrace me.

This is an incredible book for parents and educators. A journey into self-compassion, and to guiding our children to self-compassion and compassion to all. Compassion that, when offered to children with true humility and heart wisdom, as the authors of this fabulous book do also in between their words, can be the one difference a child needs to feel seen, and to grow with compassion to oneself and everyone around them.

[Marianne Pestana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Growing Self-Compassionate Children by Wendy O'Leary and Louise Shanagher is an invaluable guide for parents seeking to raise resilient, kind-hearted kids. Filled with over 70 practical activities, meditations, and games, this book makes self-compassion an active and engaging practice for the whole family. The authors skillfully blend mindfulness, child psychology, and real-world advice, emphasizing the importance of valuing a child's inherent worth rather than just their achievements. By modeling self-kindness and integrating these practices into daily life, parents can nurture emotional resilience and a deeper sense of self-love in their children. This insightful, heartfelt guide is truly a must-read for anyone looking to enrich their family's emotional well-being.

[Ash Randolph · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved reading this book. There was so much to reflect on and then having activities for me to be able to connect with my daughter was amazing. We haven’t done a lot of them together yet, but she has asked me multiple times if we can do another activity from the book. It wasn’t hard to read, it was cut up into enough different sections in each chapter that it felt easy to pick up and read and stop whenever I wanted. I read a little bit each morning and I finished it a lot faster than I thought I would. I really enjoyed it.

[Nikki]

Beautiful book with some lovely, practical exercises.

[Jennifer]

I need to buy a copy for myself, but I did pull several things for a chapter of my dissertation. I’ll come back to this and read more closely when I have time—and buy it.

[Chloe Jones · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5*

[Ashley Cox · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book! It was such an easy read and I love the activities.