Ketchup Sandwiches

by Stephanie Tobola

“For the moment, I am not a fourteen-year-old high school freshmen. The tears running down my face are no longer tears of anger. These are the tears of that eight-year-old girl who checked the mailbox every day and only found disappointment. These are the tears of a ten-year-old girl who prayed every day for someone to come and slay the dragon. The ten-year-old girl that was raped and defiled and left feeling less than human. These are the tears of a twelve-year-old girl responsible for getting her sisters to school, finding food, and trying to take care of her mentally ill mother. The tears streaming down my face are the tears of a wounded child who needed protection – protection that never came.”

Born to parents whose lives were riddled with addiction and self-medicated mental illness, Stephanie was thrust into a role of responsibility at five years old. After years of silent endurance and fending for herself, a fortuitous fire burns down her family trailer. In the wake of this tragic fire twelve- year-old Stephanie finds herself on a journey of healing. With the love and patience of her aunt and uncle combined with the help of a kind therapist, Stephanie learns tools to cope with and overcome the damage of her early childhood. Ketchup Sandwiches is a powerful memoir which reveals her incredible coming of age story.

329 pages, Kindle Edition

Published July 19, 2024

Reviews

[BookVibes · Rating 5 out of 5]

To the readers, I am writing this review with swollen eyes and a snotty nose. My head is pulsing from the amount of emotions I felt while reading this book. So once you get to a mentally ready place to pick up this book, just get your tissues ready.

Ketchup Sandwiches is a beautifully written memoir by Stephanie Tobola. You will feel all the emotions: anger, hate, sickness, sadness, and out of control. Stephine did an amazing job using words on a simple piece of paper to help you feel probably just a fraction of what she felt growing up.

Before I started Ketchup Sandwiches, I went to the author's website and read the description to see what it was about I noticed it was a memoir which made me a little nervous at first. I normally don't read these, but with just a simple expert on her website from the book, I knew I needed to read her story. I had to know how she overcame everything she went through, and I am so glad I didn't hesitate to pick up this book.

“I have learned to look at things from different perspectives and tackle things, even when I am scared. I have been forged in fire.” Chapter- Fake it “til you make it.
Yes… yes, you have been forged in fire, and in this book, Stephanie gives you the most heart-wrenching deep dive into how she got to the point of being able to look at things from different perspectives. You will see her as the child who was broken and abused, to the teenager learning how to deal with her anger and hurt, to the college student who just wants to live to the adult growing into the person she needed growing up.

Even though I am a sobbing mess, I enjoyed this book so much. It kept me emotionally involved which speaks volumes about the author's writing style and how well the book is written and laid out.
Ketchup Sandwiches will be a highly recommended read that I will share with anyone who listens and I am very grateful Stephane allowed me to read her book.

You can find more about Stephane and Ketchup Sandwiches at her website below!
https://www.stephanietobola.com/

For more information about my reviews check out my website below.
bookvibesandws.myshopify.com

[Amber McEwen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Breaking Beautifully

This book had me in tears but I'm so glad to read it. The stories are heartbreaking, but the lessons learned that the author explains is truly inspiring.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Author’s perspective on her childhood trauma and abuse. How she worked through it and went on.

[Kaitlin Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Will come up with an updated review shortly

[Joan Case]

I really wanted to finish this autobiography. I felt badly for Stephanie, raped by one of her mother's boyfriends, badly abused by her self-indulgent mother and ignored by her absent father. But after reading 43% of the book, I found that I was forcing myself to pick it up to read. It took me 5 days to get this far, but every installment of her therapy sessions sounded the same; they were a long version of daily mundane activities she happened to engage in, complete with all the minor details laid out one by one. It may pick up later in the book, but I can no longer devote time to this book.

[Christie Fries · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ketchup Sandwiches not only sheds light on a darkness but also brings HOPE. The way the author shares her story made it hard to put down her book. I could feel the hope building with the turn of each chapter throughout her memoir. Then her wonderful breakthrough that came from a "fortuitous fire". I recommend this book. There is something to learn for everyone within the covers of Ketchup Sandwiches.

[Natalie Simmons · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ketchup Sandwiches absolutely gutted me in the best, most necessary way. Stephanie’s story isn’t easy to read, but it needs to be read. From the opening lines, I was struck by the sheer emotional weight and honesty she brings to the page. Her voice is unflinching, vulnerable, and deeply courageous.

The early chapters were heartbreaking her childhood experiences are harrowing, and yet, there’s a thread of strength woven through every page. You can feel the ache of that little girl who just wanted someone to come and save her. And when the fire happens a literal and symbolic turning point, I found myself holding my breath, hoping this was where her healing would begin.

And it does. Slowly. Tenderly. With the help of family, therapy, and her own inner resilience, Stephanie starts to unlearn survival mode and rediscover what it means to be safe, to be loved, to just be a kid. Watching that transformation is nothing short of remarkable.

This memoir is for anyone who’s survived something they didn’t think they’d ever speak about. For anyone who has scars seen or unseen and is trying to find their way forward.

Trigger warnings apply Stephanie herself is upfront about this, but if you can hold space for her story, it will stay with you. It’s a testimony to the power of chosen family, the quiet strength of healing, and the importance of being heard.

I closed the book with tears in my eyes and deep gratitude for Stephanie’s bravery.

[Aurelia Hulls · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ketchup Sandwiches is a deeply moving memoir that captures both the heartbreak of childhood trauma and the strength it takes to heal. Stephanie Tobola writes with striking honesty, pulling readers into the pain of her past while also showing the resilience that carried her forward. What stood out most to me was how love, patience, and support helped her transform years of suffering into a story of survival and hope. A powerful, unforgettable read.

[James Elevare · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book hit hard it’s raw, emotional and unflinching. The story of a young girl facing trauma and trying to reclaim her sense of self is powerful, but it’s also intense and at times feels overwhelming. The writing is honest and the voice very present, though I found some pacing issues and the heaviness lingered long after I put it down. A brave read, but one you’ll need readiness for.

[Elisabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ketchup Sandwiches is a hauntingly honest and deeply moving memoir of survival, resilience, and hope. Stephanie’s story is both heartbreaking and inspiring a testament to the strength of a child who refused to be defined by trauma. Through powerful storytelling and raw vulnerability, she reminds readers that healing is possible, even after unimaginable pain.