Another fun read about one of my favorite characters, Virgil Flowers, and his redneck friends - or more accurately, his redneck criminal cases.
This one starts out with a lovely character, D. Wayne Sharf, who among his other endeavors, is out stealing dogs - and he's no dog lover. He doesn't seem to be an animal lover. In fact, he doesn't seem to love anyone other than himself. The story intersects one of his other hobbies, cooking meth, but that's more of a side story. In fact, both of these crimes are side stories to the main crime, which is the local school board (all of them) stealing money from the school. Unfortunately, these people are a bit over the top about avoiding capture, and that's where the story gets interesting. Some nosy local newspaper reporter/drunk/druggie has started asking too many questions, and the board calls a private meeting after the public one.
The dognapping case is a strange one. People sometimes hear dogs barking in the early morning up in the hills, then it stops and there's no sign of dogs when they investigate, just an empty caged area. Also, no sign of people moving the dogs. While investigating, they discover the evidence of meth cooking, which adds some danger to the dog napping case. If they come upon meth cookers, there's no telling what might happen. but none of this is as dangerous as a bunch of school board members.
There were a few new interesting characters in the story that I wish we'd see more of. The first one was introduced while Virgil was poking around in the hills looking for dog nappers, named Muddy Ruff. He was a young kid with a .22 rifle, about 12 years old, and knew a lot about the area's topography and people. And he was a good shot with his rifle. He was Virgil's guide for sneaking around, which he excelled at. He also seemed to be part dog, as he could sniff things out like one.
The other interesting character was an old woman who happened to have the school budget that Virgil wanted checked out from the library. Virgil found out about her from someone at the library:
“Janice is a little nuts, so go easy with her.”
“How nuts? Does she carry a gun?”
“No, no gun. A gun isn’t nuts, that’s just Monday in Trippton. Anyway, Janice thinks the school spends too much money on math, science, and sports, and not enough on the arts.”
“That’s outrageous,” Virgil said.
“Like I said, take it easy with her.”
So, he went to see her, an old lady with a cane. She was a little reluctant to let him in, but after a bit, came back and invited him in.
“You found somebody to vouch for me?”
“The sheriff. He said you looked like a hippie who’s lost the faith, or a cowboy who’s lost his horse. That fits.”
“Remind me to shoot the sheriff,” Virgil said, as he stepped inside.
She knew it was from an Eric Clapton song, and Bob Marley before that.
I took a liking to her after Virgil asked her if she was alright, and this exchange took place:
“Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not. I cracked my hip a few months ago and it hasn’t quite healed,” she said.
“Sorry to hear that,” Virgil said, as she limped toward the kitchen. “How’d you do it?”
“I was skateboarding on the levee and lost my edges,” she said.
“You were skateboarding?”
She turned and looked at him and shook her head in exasperation: “No, you dummy, I fell. On the ice. On the sidewalk. Like old people do.”
Virgil: “Oh.”
She shook her head again. “Jesus wept.”
She was a great help with interpreting the budget figures, too. Fortunately, he didn't even need to coerce her, as she seemed happy to help. Not like one of his other possible witnesses who was actually involved, where he needed to threaten him a bit, like with this exchange:
Virgil said, “I’ll give you the number, Buster, but this coupon has an expiration date. If you talk to me five minutes too late, you’re going to the joint. The pen. The big house. The Minnesota Correctional Facility at Stillwater. You get up there, a nice-looking guy like you . . . Well, you know that old country saying, ‘Butter my butt and call me a biscuit’? Well, they’ll be buttering your butt, but not because they think you’re a biscuit.”
All in all, a fun read. Except maybe for the dog cruelty.