SIMPLY NEGLECT: Redemption beyond poverty and foster care

by Lainie Hartley

Three-year-old Lainie kicks and screams as she tightly grips the leg of her older sister, pleading to stay with her family as she’s surrendered to the foster care system. Lainie, a year later, is reunited with her family, only to live another five tumultuous years hungry, neglected, and desperate for love and attention. Houseless again, Lainie’s mother breaks her promise of forever when she gives her away again, this time, in a motel parking lot, never to live with her or her family again.

Plagued with trauma, and consumed by the effects of abandonment and shame, fifteen-year-old Lainie escapes her living situation, and embarks on a naive and lonesome journey that feels similar to her mother’s. Desperate for change, Lainie enters a transformative Christ-centered recovery program and months later, falls in love with Levi, a pillar of unyielding love, her rock in the storm.

Lainie naively believes marriage and motherhood will heal her childhood wounds. Instead, she is ravaged by the years of neglect from her mother, which fuels an insatiable desire to understand her past. Investigating her foster care file, she reads the words, “No abuse – Simply Neglect.” Lainie realizes the system meant to protect her, neglected her too.

Aware of the injustice affecting today’s foster children, and the urgent need for foster and adoptive homes, Levi and Lainie become licensed and open their home to several children, including their forever son through adoption.

Lainie’s story is a testament to faith, forgiveness, and the resilience of the human spirit.

Genres: Fostering

210 pages, Paperback

Published June 20, 2024

Reviews

[Casondra Radford · Rating 5 out of 5]

Whoaaah… prepare your heart and mind. It’s heavy, raw, unfiltered and a much NEEDED book! I consider Lainie a dear friend and I’m grateful she put her story to words. I saw my foster children through her story and I had to put the book down for a few months to process.

[Abigail Nebot · Rating 4 out of 5]

Had to read for class but glad I picked this book very engaging story told about authors life from her POV. Insane story and makes you feel lucky to have what you do in life #sappy

[Courtney L · Rating 5 out of 5]

Started and finished this amazing book in one day. I couldn’t put it down. This is a wonderfully shared story of resilience in painful circumstances that are unfortunately too common to children in communities in our nation and world wide. The children and families experiencing neglect/abuse aren’t well served or protected by those meant to protect them (speaking of the general public sometimes but lots of times the social warfare/department of Human Resources/foster care system) more regular families need to step up to be a safe home and loving support for the children and families touched by this system (while well intentioned there aren’t enough open safe homes or social workers to staff the departments that kids and families rely on to be seen, helped, and protected)

As a foster parent appreciated and respected the work this lady has obviously put in to work through and navigate her story so that she could share it with us from a place of honesty and even healing. She is the real hero. The survivor that not only survives but comes back to be part of the healing process for those coming after her.

There are no easy stories and no simple solutions, but God absolutely brought beauty from ashes in this story and I pray continues to do so Over the course of the author’s whole life.

Go buy it and read it! Then consider how you can be part of the solution.

[Rin Dillow · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Simply Neglect” by Lainie Hartley is one of the most powerful memoirs I’ve ever read. From the very first page, I was completely drawn into Lainie’s story—her pain, her resilience, and ultimately, her redemption.

Her experiences in the foster care system, labeled as “simply neglect” rather than abuse, highlight the heartbreaking reality so many children face. Yet, despite the trauma, Lainie’s story is not just one of suffering—it’s one of hope, faith, and the incredible strength of the human spirit.

What makes this book so impactful is its raw honesty. Lainie doesn’t hold back in describing the hardships she endured, but she also beautifully showcases the power of faith, love, and perseverance. Her journey from a neglected child to a foster and adoptive mother herself is nothing short of inspiring.

This book is a must-read for anyone who cares about foster care, childhood trauma, or simply wants to be moved by an incredible true story. It’s heartbreaking, uplifting, and unforgettable. I can’t recommend it enough!

[Talia-Rae · Rating 5 out of 5]

You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll get angry at a system that failed Lainie and her family. Lainie is vulnerable and open with sharing her experiences as a child who experienced neglect, while focusing simultaneously on the hope for the future and the trust she has in God. A very well written memoir, Lainie brings readers along with her through every experience she has and the emotions she felt, allowing readers to experience each emotion alongside her. This is definitely a must read for people involved with the foster care system, and really just anyone looking to learn from a first hand perspective!

[Faith (Fox) Milam · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lainie has an incredible gift of being able to tell her vulnerable, inspiring life story. Heart wrenching, but absolutely moving.

[Sarah Brooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

I always struggle to give ratings to memoirs. It’s impossible to rate someone’s life experience and story.
I heard Lainie speak at “she will Rise” conference in London On and wanted to know more about her experience and how she was able to keep her faith through so much trauma.
The book is well written and flows easily. It is heartbreaking to hear what her experience were like as a child but inspiring that she now uses this history to create a better future for her family and for others.

[Tara Hackspacher · Rating 5 out of 5]

Must read for all!

While I've followed the author on Instagram for quite some time, I didn't know the full depth of her story. What a heartbreaking, yet incredible story she has to share.

[Becki · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simply Neglect is one of the most moving memoirs I’ve ever read. Lainie Hartley tells her story with honesty and courage, showing how neglect can wound a child as deeply as abuse, but also how healing and redemption are possible.

Her journey from poverty and foster care to faith, love, and purpose is inspiring and heartbreaking at the same time. I couldn’t put this book down. It’s raw, real, and full of hope.

I highly recommend it to anyone who loves true stories of survival and transformation.

[Melissa Corkum · Rating 5 out of 5]

Powerful memoir

Lainie's writing style will pull you into even the hardest-to-read parts of her story. Make sure you read until the end, so you get to witness the incredible redemption that only God can orchestrate.

[Clara Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simply Neglect is one of those books that pulls you in from the very first page. Lainie’s story of survival, abandonment, and resilience is gut-wrenching but filled with hope. Her journey from a little girl lost in the foster system to a woman who chooses to foster and adopt is raw, inspiring, and deeply moving.

Reading Lainie’s story felt like looking into a mirror at times. As someone who has also experienced the foster system and the long-lasting effects of neglect, I related to so much of her pain and determination. When she discovered the words “No abuse – Simply Neglect” in her file, it hit me like a punch to the gut. That phrase, so cold and dismissive, is all too familiar to many of us who have been through the system.

What makes this book even more special is the way it’s written. Lainie’s voice is unique and captivating, with a raw honesty that brings every emotion to life. You feel her heartbreak, her anger, and her hope in a way that stays with you long after you close the book.

I couldn’t be more proud of Lainie—not just for surviving but for the courage it took to share her story and for the love she gives to the kids who come into her life. Her faith and her relationship with Levi are a beautiful reminder that healing is possible, even when the road is long and hard.

This book is more than just a memoir; it’s a call to action. It’s a reminder of the cracks in the foster care system and the resilience it takes to rise above them. Simply Neglect is a must-read for anyone who wants to understand the foster care experience and the strength of the human spirit.

[Amanda Schwind · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have followed Lainie on Instagram for about a year. In February, we happened to sit down next to each other at the Filled conference for foster and adoptive moms. She is a real and genuine in real life as she is through the pages of her story.

Lainie, I praise God for the way He has and is continuing to redeem your story and your family. Thank you for allowing your vulnerability to honor Him.

*Side note: I bought this book 3 months ago, SO excited to support Lainie and dive right in. But I wasn't in a mentally and emotionally healthy enough place. So I shelved it until this week. So thankful that I did. It is RAW and INTENSE and may need to be read in bite-sized pieces and not before bedtime. And yet, this was Lainie's reality...

[Katherine Krige · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lainie writes a story of neglect, but filled with the incredibly hard work that goes into healing a damaged soul. Her tumultuous early years spent in and out of foster homes is heartbreaking, but hope is at the heart of every page. Her story pulls you along as you quickly turn pages in her compelling tale.

My only critiques are that another round of edits could have tightened up a few areas, but it's a great debut book. Keep shining your light and Making the world a better place with your spirit!

[Katie Elise · Rating 5 out of 5]

A difficult story well told

This book has a lot of hard things that it describes, not in excruciating detail, but well enough to understand how horrible a situation Lainie was in as a child. She also lets you into her inner world as a kid in a hard place in a really sweet way. I enjoyed reading about her resilience and personality. She is honest, and hopeful. I really appreciated how she wrote about redemption that has occured in her life while also acknowledging that things are still hard.

[Sara DeRoo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Author Lainie Hartley brings the reader into the struggles of a three year-old little girl living in unimaginable circumstances due to poverty and mental illness. We have a front row seat to that three year-old as she navigates placements into different families and broken attempts by the system to assist the struggling family. She shares both the internal and external journey through her trauma.. Her faith shines as she finds herself enduring situations that will break your heart. This inspirational memoir is well done and highly recommended.

[Foxx Kincaid · Rating 3 out of 5]

First and Foremost, Lainie's story is compelling, so I agree with the reviews. The author is a beautiful, creative writer who uses many visuals and metaphors. I also enjoyed the read from her standpoint alone. The book is also written in the present tense. I read the E-book version.
However, the editing killed it for me. By page 3, I sensed the editing was mediocre. For example, I saw a run-on 50-word sentence that could've easily been divided into two. Second, I saw formatting issues where the "bullets" weren't aligned. Third, I saw a comma instead of a period at the end. Fourth, I saw an overlap of a similar sentence on top of another, making me think it was Groundhog Day. There were other structural issues, but I won't explain the 'Rules of Editing.'
Each book has its quirks, and no book is 100% perfect.
Overall, it's a great read if you overlook the editing.