»Alec und ich gehen getrennte Wege. Wir lassen uns scheiden.« Nicht dass zwischen den Müttern von Betsy und Alec Canning je ein gutes Wort gefallen wäre, doch als Betsys Brief eintrifft, sind sie sich sofort einig: Die Scheidung muss um jeden Preis verhindert werden! Weder Betsys Geständnis, in der Ehe unglücklich zu sein, noch Alecs Seitensprünge ändern daran auch nur das Geringste. Ist das letzte Wort möglicherweise noch nicht gesprochen? Alec hofft, seine Frau umzustimmen, wenn er an sich arbeitet, und vielleicht bedenkt Betsy ja die Folgen einer Trennung für ihre drei Kinder. Doch die Mütter und all die anderen, die auf einmal unbedingt mitreden wollen – Hausangestellte, Nachbarn, Freunde –, machen das letzte bisschen Hoffnung auf eine Versöhnung zwischen den Eheleuten zunichte. Betsy und Alec sind den Rosenkrieg bald leid, aber da ist so mancher Fehler schon nicht mehr rückgängig zu machen …
Margaret Kennedy was an English novelist and playwright. She attended Cheltenham Ladies' College, where she began writing, and then went up to Somerville College, Oxford in 1915 to read history. Her first publication was a history book, A Century of Revolution (1922). Margaret Kennedy was married to the barrister David Davies. They had a son and two daughters, one of whom was the novelist Julia Birley. The novelist Serena Mackesy is her grand-daughter.
I love Margaret Kennedy’s writing, but I didn’t rush to pick up this book because I wasn’t that taken with the subject matter. The disintegration of a marriage, and all of the fallout from that, in upper middle-class England between the wars ….
When I finally picked the book up – thinking of Margaret Kennedy Day, which is only a couple of weeks away – I was hooked from the first page. It is a wonderfully engaging human drama; beautifully written and rich with understanding and insight.
It all begins with a letter.
Betsy Canning wrote a long letter to her mother, explaining why her marriage was much less happy than it appeared, why her husband’s rise from suburban civil servant to successful librettist and the changes that it brought to their lives hadn’t suited her; and why, therefore, they had agreed to divorce.
She hoped that her mother would understand and support her; but Mrs Hewitt was terribly shocked and rushed back from her holiday in Switzerland, pausing only to send a telegram:
” … horrified … ‘do nothing irrevocable till I see you …”
Mrs Hewitt went immediately to Mrs Canning, her ‘fellow mother-in-law’, so that they could work together to set things right. But by the time she arrived she was in a state of nervous collapse, and the formidable Mrs Canning set out for her son’s Welsh holiday home without any real understanding of the crisis she was going to have to resolve.
Alec had persuaded Betsy to think again about divorce, they had agreed to go away for a while alone to talk it over, but Mrs Canning’s arrival and her efforts to reconcile the couple didn’t help at all. The peace talks collapsed, there were bitter arguments, and the mood of the house changed.
Alec decided that he had to go away.
Joy, his wife’s mother’s help, followed him. She was infatuated, he was charmed, and so they left together.
And so the stage was set for a terrible scandal and an acrimonious divorce.
Margaret Kennedy managed all of this drama beautifully. She drew her characters and relationships quite simply but so well that it was easy to understand why events played out as they did. I saw that Betsy and Alec could have been happy together, that their relationship could have been beautifully balances; but I could also see that it so easily unbalance and break.
The stories of what Betsy and Alec do next are fascinating. His career is damaged by the scandal surrounding is divorce and when he learns that Joy is expecting a child he realises that they are irrevocably bound together. She had liked the idea of independence but she is flattered by the attentions of Lord St Mullins and finds the lifestyle that marriage to a peer could bring her rather appealing.
The stories of the effects on their elder two children are more profound. Kenneth sides with his mother, and says that he will never speak with his father again; but he is troubled and that makes him easy prey for school bullies who will lead him into a great deal of trouble. Eliza would rather go to her father, but she fears losing touch with her siblings, and she is disturbed when she finds that there is a new baby in her fathers home.
Margaret Kennedy weaves a wonderful plot from these and other threads; drawing in enough to give a clear picture of the world around the different members of the Canning family as they spilled out of the family home.
She spoke clearly about how quickly events can run out of control, about how decisions can have so many repercussions, and about how vulnerable children are, even – and maybe particularly -when they are very nearly grown up.
Her characters are not always likeable, but they are real, fallible human beings, and their stories are full of real and varied emotions.
Everything rings true.
Some characters learn and grow; some characters don’t.
I loved the use of letters in this book, and this passage from a letter written by a family friend really struck me:
“I don’t see how any of them can ever be happy again. You say it is love gone bad. Do you think that is because they are all denying the truth? Love doesn’t go bad, however unhappy it makes you, unless you poison it yourself. It isn’t the injuries and wrongs that they can’t forgive; it’s because they know, Alec and Betsy know, and Joy does too, that in spite of everything, in spite of all they’ve done and said to hurt each other, they can’t bear to be apart.”
I loved that while this book is very much of its time there is a great deal about it that is timeless.
There were interesting details and points to ponder. I wondered if Joy, who became rather down-trodden, was suffering from post-natal depression. I noticed that she and Lord St Mullins had many shared interests and concerns. I wondered what would happen to the family of German refugees granted a home on the Cannings’ estate in Wales,
I’m inclined to agree with Margaret Kennedy’s daughter, Julia Birley, who writes into the introduction to the Virago edition of this book that this was one of her mother’s best half dozen.
It’s not my favourite, but it is a very good book, I’m very glad that I finally picked it up, and I think that Margaret Kennedy did what she set out to do very well indeed.
5 stars. I don't often give 5 stars but this is a book that I could read again and learn something new about myself each time I read it. It is a story of the breakup of a marriage. How the couple stopped caring for each other and striving to meet the other's needs, worrying more about what they were receiving than what they were giving. They became lazy and complacent. It is the story of how the people around them, unintentionally, contributed to the downfall of this relationship. It is the tale of the breakup's effect on the children and how everyone learns to go on and make the best of the circumstances, knowing that the true "best" was carelessly discarded. A thought provoking story. It caused me to consider my own marriage and what I can/should do to preserve it. It made me think about the effect of my words on other's relationships and the responsibility I have to build rather than to tear down. I will definitely read more from Margaret Kennedy.
I thought this would be a British comedy with that kind of French book cover, but it wasn't. Anyway, that didn't really bother me.
Rebecca, Wuthering heights : I've read and adored novels with unlikeable characters in it and I never cared, but here, I didn't feel anything for any of them. I liked Margaret Kennedy's writing, however the story - a study of characters - didn't attract me. I read it entirely, but more out of duty and somehow wanting to find out how it ended rather than out of immersing myself into it. In fact, it was a story with wealthy middle class people having wealthy middle class problems and I just didn't care enough.
Margaret Kennedy is a marvel. I’ve now read three of her novels, liked them all but this one the most. Kennedy writes beautifully, wonderful turns of phrase, and she is funny, quirky, and so astute about growing up, whenever in the course of life that happens. This novel is about an ill-advised divorce, a glimpse of freedom or a greener pasture, at a stage when both husband and wife believe they have “all the time there is.” The consequences of this move, so lightly taken, almost accidental, and resisted by interfering mothers and by children treated like bystanders, prove to be entirely serious. I was never sure how the author would work her story out, but it absorbed me with its poignancy, humor, and truthfulness.
Together and Apart, which has just been reissued by Vintage Books, was first published in 1936. Margaret Kennedy dedicated this, her seventh novel, to fellow author Rose Macaulay.
Together and Apart begins with a letter, written from protagonist Betsy Cannon, residing in Pandy Madoc in Wales, to her mother. This technique ensures that we learn about our protagonist from the very beginning of the story, and serves to immediately announce the main thread of plot. It also wonderfully sets the scene and tone for the rest of the novel.
In the letter, Betsy informs her mother that she and her husband Alec are 'parting company' and seeking a divorce: '... we have been quite miserable, both of us. We simply are unsuited to one another and unable to get on.' She tells of the way in which she finds her husband's writing of operettas 'vulgar', and does not feel that doing so is a 'worthwhile profession for an educated man like Alec'. The pair have decided to separate for the sake of their children: 'I now think that they would be happier if Alec and I gave up this miserable attempt... I don't want the children to grow up with a distorted idea of marriage, got from the spectacle of parents who can't get on'.
Divorcing during the 1920s was, of course, a scandal, and Kennedy addresses this fact well in the third person narrative perspective, which she utilises for much of the book. She demonstrates the way in which the divorce affects all of those around Betsy and Alec, from their children to their outraged parents. Despite this, Betsy remains hopeful about her own future: 'Very much happier was how she had imagined it... Of course she would marry again some time. And the other man, whoever he was, would love her better than Alec ever had, would worship and cherish her'.
Kennedy discusses familial relationships and their breakdown throughout the novel, and everything which she touches upon is shown in mind of the impending divorce. Together and Apart, even all these years later, is still an important novel, just as relevant to our society today as it was upon its publication.
J’ADORE cette rédaction, cette plume et cette imagination c’est du génie. La chronologie est parfaitement bien liée par je ne sais quelle magie. Bref bravo Margaret comme d’hab tu gères.
The 1920s is another period where what people would say was obviously of paramount importance. Betsy has decided to divorce her husband Alec - her reasons seem somewhat lopsided. She feels let down by her marriage and feels that happiness has somewhat eluded her. Her husband has never been passionately involved with her and despite knowing about his liaisons with various women, she now takes it upon herself to bring up the latest mistress as one of the reasons for her leaving him. On the sidelines is her cousin who has always been in love with her and who has offered marriage on innumerable occasions. He is also very rich, an Earl into the bargain and is an ideal alternative to her.
She discounts however the interference from family. On informing her parents (holidaying in Switzerland) about the impending divorce her mother hotfoots back home to try to prevent this. Her mother is not interested in Betsy's personal feelings on this subject but only on preventing her divorce. Her mother in law has more decided views on the subject - despite her support for her son, she does not want this divorce to go through. She does not want to be the subject of gossip by her circle of friends and so she descends on the family to see what she can do.
The break up of the marriage and its effect on three very susceptible children, maybe two of them badly affected by the divorce - the two elder children not knowing who is right or wrong, taking wrong decisions, forcing parents themselves to choose and in a custody battle where at sixteen they have to choose which parent they want to live with, completely cutting the other parent off. Barbaric, very difficult to handle situations for children.
The need for provision of proof of the other woman in this case pushes the husband into being forced into a decision of a relationship with the young woman who looked after his children. He is not in love with her, she is madly in love with him and because of the lack of an alternative he almost is forced to begin an affair with her! His disinterest is obvious and how he is maneuvered into this relationship is farcical.
The divorce ultimately does take place, each partner marries someone else but it is almost as if it was by accident than by design.
I did not enjoy the divorce part but the setting of 1920s is a favourite period of mine. I liked the exchange of letters from friends who sought to do whatever they felt they could do to put the pieces of the couple's lives together. The interfering mother in law was an old cat, wily and only supportive of her son and seemed typical! Betsy's mother seemed a more floundering, helpless type. I did like the characterization!
It's very full and kind of brimming with life and people who are living, specially at the start, where the tone is different and things soar a little higher - later it goes kind of down, and doesn't really lift again.
Margaret Kennedy is very skilled at writing characters that feel fully like people, and that behave, age and change in ways that feel so true to how we've gotten to know them as people over time, and yet still are a little unpredictable. I think that's one of her great skills here, too, the ability to illustrate so well moments of internal flux, and not just to suggest them in general but to get at them the way her characters probably would get at them. She's fully inside their heads, knows their ins and outs and how they work.
I do like this better in the first half than in the latter. After a while it became less a story and more of just a detached character study (when it worked as both, and not so detached, it worked something really wonderful for me), and the more it went on, I felt I could only care about these people vaguely, and maybe insincerely. Still, she's so good at understanding them and what lies behind the dynamics of how they behave.
And like her true to life characters, it's inconclusive, a little vague, ebbing and flowing with good and bad moments and, more often than that, with moments that hover in the in-between. You feel some of the people are better, and some worse, off; but in a way it doesn't seem to matter. You get the impression they'll just keep getting over it and moving on from it while also allowing it to define them in a kind of way; different things will come and go, similar things will come and go; they'll wonder and never really know, and they'll probably always be caught in a state of being both simultaneously together and apart.
I have to wonder if Mark is modeled on Kennedy's own husband, a judge. Mark is mostly a superhero. Alec does a lot of bumbling, but he is credited with a great many insights about his wife and other characters, and he seems to know exactly what a man of his class should do when his son is involved in a motoring accident.
The female characters are varied, and described with great flaws as well as some virtues; yet I can't escape the impression that the males come across as the superior sex. That is what makes me wonder if Kennedy indeed relied on her husband to know how to behave and to offer useful advice. Many intelligent women of my generation and previous ones have absorbed patriarchy's views on women, giving more of their attention and more weight to males than to females. Kennedy perhaps also.
The inner workings of an elite boys school are seen. The mother in law is written boldly and would do well on the stage, trying to manipulate people in their lives through deceitful ways, though she's allowed to be human as well, at the end.
Still, this is a good book, with a most interesting and entertaining set of events and character studies. Sometime I will be glad to read some of her other many novels; this one, rightly or wrongly, is rated quite low on the list. I wonder because it makes the reader often uncomfortable, forced to recognize how common are the all-too-recognizable failures of the characters to be forgiving and accepting of each other.
There are a few instances of outright antisemitic remarks.
I have the Virago edition, with a short but good intro by Kennedy's daughter. Kennedy wrote a lot of plays too, and that can be seen in this novel.
I did not think a 1930's book about a divorce would keep my interest, but i ended up devouring this book. Kennedy creates flawed characters who make mistake after mistake, yet you end up liking them and cheering for a happy ending for all of them (which you get). This is the first book I've read by Kennedy and I will be seeking out more!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
This was just about readable. It felt very dated. I suspect when it was first published in the 1930's it was a gasp out loud kind of book. It chronicles a family's fortunes as they come to terms with a divorce. The story tells how each were affected. O.K, but not brilliant.
Another excellent book by Margaret Kennedy, centered around the unnecessary divorce of Betsy and Alec Canning and the way they rebuild their lives afterwards. Betsy is a somewhat spoilt woman who toys with the idea of divorce mostly because, on the cusp of 40, she feels life is passing her by. Sure, she has plenty of grounds for being dissatisfied with Alec: he has a mistress, is often in his cups and doesn't pull his weight at home. Basically he is a lazy sod who always takes the path of least resistance. His saving grace is that he has turned into a highly successful librettist, but in fact Betsy liked him better as a humble civil servant than as a fatuous socialite. However, it's only when Alec's mother tries to prevent the divorce that things really go pear-shaped. Wrongly believing that Betsy has already decided to marry her rich cousin Max, Alec storms out of his house, taking with him the dim and gorgeous baby-sitter Joy who has long worshipped him. For a while things go very badly for everybody, especially for Alec who is roundly blamed by all and sundry, quickly grows tired of Joy, and loses his inspiration. The 3 children, as always, suffer the consequences and become pawns in the game. Kenneth is fiercely loyal to his mother until she does finally accept to marry Max, partly for his money but also because she is genuinely moved by his idealism and universal generosity. Buoyed by an endorsement from Kenneth's charismatic friend Mark, Eliza sets herself to help Alec and his hapless wife, who has turned into an incompetent mother to their baby Peter. Eliza overshoots and is in danger of turning into a real bossy boots, but changes course over a near tragedy when Kenneth is involved in a car accident and initially accused of having killed a cyclist. On the rather hackneyed subject of divorce this is a wise and warm-heated book showing that even well-meaning interference often has dire results. Betsy's worst fault, in my view, is her lack of empathy with the Blochs, a persecuted German-Jewish couple to whom Alec has offered the use of their guest cottage at the beginning of the story. Later, Betsy tells Max she won't marry him if he allows the same couple, homeless once more, to live in a corner of his mansion. Since the book was published in 1936, I admire Kennedy for weaving this sub-plot into her tapestry.
I very much liked her book published in 1950, ‘The Feast’. I read it in one sitting...couldn’t put it down. When I read other Goodreads reviews a number of them had that same comment.... that they couldn’t put it down. So, there’s a recommendation before I even babble about this one!
Short review because I was ‘meh’ on it. Some parts were good and some parts sort of dragged. Perhaps it dragged in part because of its length, 341 pages. It sort of picked up at the end...
Synopsis from back cover of my Virago Modern Classics/The Dial Press re-issue: • It is 1936, and in British society the decision to divorce still constitutes a major disgrace—an alternative to be considered only in cases of scandalous adultery. But Betsy Canning decides almost unconsciously to leave her husband, Thirty-seven-year-old Betsy is married to Alec, a famous West End lyricist. They have all the comforts of British middle-class life between the wars. But Betsy is tired: the three children, their servants, their homes in Hampstead and Wales. The circle of Alec’s theatrical friends—all make eternal demands upon her. Her relationship with her husband can’t withstand the attrition of domestic life. When friends and family try to interfere to save the marriage, a bitter separation is set in motion, one that has disastrous consequences for the entire family. ‘Together and Apart’ is a love story of the most unusual kind. It reflects Margaret Kennedy’s greatest talents as a novelist: an accurate yet humorous eye for the minutiae of daily living, and a sympathetic understanding of its oddities and complexities.
Mlle Alice, pouvez-vous nous raconter votre rencontre avec Divorce à l'Anglaise ? "Le Festin, réédité l'année dernière chez le même éditeur, a été l'un de mes plus jolis coups de coeur de 2022, ce n'est donc rien de dire que j'attendais celui-ci avec grande impatience. Et puis, couverture de Mathieu Persan quoi."
Dites-nous en un peu plus sur son histoire... "Betsy est décidée, Alec et elle doivent divorcer. C'est entendu entre eux, tout est réglé et se déroulera dans la plus grande cordialité. Mais la mère de ce dernier n'est pas d'accord, elle, et elle est déterminée à venir y mettre son grain de sel..."
Mais que s'est-il exactement passé entre vous ? "Au départ, ça commençait bien. J'ai retrouvé ce que j'aime dans la plume de Margaret Kennedy, son humour, sa finesse, son analyse psychologique. Elle a quelque chose de Jane Austen, j'ose le dire. Après, il y a l'écriture bien sûr, mais il y a aussi l'histoire que raconte l'auteur. Ici, très vite, j'ai compris que pour moi le plaisir de lecture serait très limité. C'est précisément le genre de récit que je n'aime pas, une famille qui se délite par bêtise, fierté, manque de communication. Regarder des gens qui auraient tout pour être heureux déconstruire pas à pas leur vie et se rendre misérables ne me procure aucune espèce de joie, satisfaction ou je ne sais quoi d'autre. Je peux reconnaître toutes les qualités littéraires à ce roman, il n'en reste pas moins que je n'ai pas aimé, et j'en suis la plus peinée."
Et comment cela s'est-il fini ? "J'ai malgré tout plus apprécié la fin que le reste, le rythme s'accélère et après quelques rebondissements, chacun reprend sa vie et accepte son lot. Que faire d'autre..."
Margaret Kennedy , découverte l'été dernier à l'occasion d'une L.C de son roman Le Festin, est déjà en 1936 une auteure reconnue et appréciée. Or en 1936, tout divorce s'accompagnait de scandale en particulier dans la moyenne bourgeoisie aisée en général et campant sur les traditions et la respectabilité , surtout sur celles des autres soi dit en passant. Betsy et Alec se sont mariés par amour, trois beaux enfants sont nés. Kenneth l'ainé viscéralement attaché à sa mère, Daphné jolie fille éperdument amoureuse d'elle-même et Eliza la benjamine, un peu trop ronde et en prise au mépris de ses ainés.. L'argent rentre largement Alec écrit les lyriques d'opérette et cela fonctionne mais voilà il fréquente un monde d'artistes où l'alcool coule à flots, où les infidélités sont légion , un monde qui n'est pas du goût de Betsy qui le juge indigne d'elle... Betsy s'ennuie et tanne Alec pour obtenir le divorce ,elle a en vue Max un amoureux éconduit avant son mariage mais depuis il est devenu Comte et est fort riche ... Tout pourrait se résoudre à l'amiable si Emily Canning, la mère d'Alec, ne décidait d'intervenir. Les dés sont jetés . Mesquinerie, mensonges, roublardise, défaillance des amis, conflits familiaux, chacun va prendre position... Margaret Kennedy a la plume alerte, facile, souvent caustique pour dépeindre ce milieu qu'elle connait fort bien. Les personnages sont criants de vérité, et par ci par là les propos se font plus "politiques", le monde continue de tourner et les prises de conscience se font jour. Un divorce que je résumerai à un grand gâchis mais c'est la vie !
Par où commencer? Une œuvre assez inégale. Le récit débute comme un vaudeville dans un milieu bourgeois. Les ragots fusant de toutes parts provoquent la séparation d’un couple. Les personnages féminins sont majoritairement désagréables, soit des sottes ou des mégères. Les personnages masculins manquent d’ambition et se laissent facilement influencer, même berner. En milieu de parcours, l’autrice tente ensuite de mettre un peu de sérieux en traitant de la guerre, de l’avenir politique tout en mettant en scène le balbutiement d’une possible relation amoureuse. Au final, rien de bien marquant.
Betsy Canning a tout pour être heureuse, un mari, des enfants, une vie confortable de femme au foyer et pourtant elle n'est pas heureuse et décide de demander le divorce. Elle espère que que la séparation se passera au mieux mais l'interférence de diverses personnes, y compris sa belle -mère, ajoute de l'huile sur le feu rendant la situation difficile. Nous sommes en 1936 en Angleterre, avec au premier plan les difficultés et les défis auxquels les femmes sont confrontées lorsqu'elle veulent reconquérir leur indépendance et leur autonomie à une époque où les rôles de genre sont clairement définis. La vie de Betsy illustre également les conséquences souvent douloureuses d'un divorce houleux doublé d'un scandale. Les effets sur leurs enfants et leurs proches de leur prise de position en faveur de l'un ou l'autre, les rendront vulnérables. N'oublions pas les pressions sociales auxquelles elle est soumise pour se conformer aux normes de la société. Leur nouvelle vie après leur divorce est de ce point de vue, fascinante. L'utilisation de divers courriers dans le roman donne au lecteur une impression d'immersion dans l'esprit des personnages et des situations. Après avoir découvert Margaret Kennedy par son superbe roman Le festin, j'étais ravie de lire cette nouvelle parution qui m'a une fois de plus transportée dans un autre monde. Son style d'écriture porte en lui son époque, il est élégant et précis. Elle a une capacité à saisir l'air du temps et tous les changements sociaux, culturels ou politiques. La psychologie des personnages est à la fois complexe et nuancée, leur motivation profonde et les conflits intérieurs qui les habitent les rendent humains. Enfin je trouve qu'elle montre toujours une belle sensibilité aux nuances de l'âme humaine. Elle excelle à décrire les émotions, les pensées et les sentiments des personnages, ainsi que les relations complexes qui les lient les uns aux autres. Bonne lecture.
3.5 ☆ - Je suis épatée que ce roman soit l'œuvre d'une autrice des années 30 tant la manière d'être et de penser des personnages ne me semble pas si anachronique à celle d'aujourd'hui. Je n'ai pas arrêté de me demander si l'autrice n'était pas en fait une contemporaine. Peut-être est-ce la traduction? Ou alors le signe qu'on n'a pas si évolué socialement? Ou que le monde tel qu'il régresse rend déjà difficile la distinction entre le passé et le présent? Quoiqu'il en soit, ce Divorce à l'anglaise offre un très bon spectacle doux-amer des relations humaines et sert quelques bonnes leçons de vie qui fouettent sans devenir agaçantes. Je l'ai lu comme on dévore une vraie bonne téléréalité - et perso, j'adore ce genre de "fiction".