Everything Is Fine, I'll Just Work Harder: Confessions of a Former Badass

by Cara Gormally

One queer person bravely and creatively uses therapy to navigate the healing from the trauma of a past sexual assault

One day, during an ordinary early-morning run, Cara’s watch dinged with a Facebook friend request. But when they checked the message, the photo slammed them backward in time and froze them in fear. Their rapist wanted to “friend” them.

Cara always had a long to-do list; always had many projects; always was busy. But as their rapist continued to send friend requests and tried to reconnect with them, they began to lose their grip on their work, projects, and relationships. But then Cara connects with a therapist who guides them through a long but powerful process of healing. And Cara works to desensitize, reprocess, excavate and relive the old wounds in order to move past them and heal.

Genres: Graphic Novels, Memoir, Comics, Mental Health, Nonfiction, Adult, LGBT

144 pages, Paperback

First published April 15, 2025

Reviews

[Maia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a thoughtful and intimate memoir of processing trauma, which goes into the mechanics of how EMDR therapy works the point of view of someone who is both a patient and scientific researcher. Cara is a very busy and successful academic who packs as much into their days as possible, until a facebook friend notification from the man who raped them in college shakes them out of their routine and forces them to face memories and feelings they've been suppressing for years. Cara models and documents the long, nonlinear process of healing and learning to be kinder and gentler with their own brain, body, and emotions.

[Rod Brown · Rating 3 out of 5]

A memoir about coping with past trauma when feelings about it are triggered years later.

I was most engaged when the author shared their experience using talk therapy and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EDMR) therapy, leading us through the ups and downs of the months of grueling work.

Though the narrative was obviously supposed to be very focused on the therapy, I was still frustrated at times by the vagueness and obvious gaps in the backstory: from their barely there but impactful parents, to the circumstances of the original trauma, to their relationship with their current partner -- a little-seen cypher, unnamed in the story and ambiguous in presentation (I probably would have misgendered them if I were asked to describe the narrative at the midpoint . . . and still could) -- to their use of they/them pronouns. I felt like I was missing large swaths of information and often caught myself filling in the blank spots with bad assumptions.

Good for what it is, but it feels like a "tip of the iceberg" situation.

[Haley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Relatable and enlightening. ❤️

[Lauren · Rating 4 out of 5]

A workaholic discovers that the reason they can never rest is from past traumas and delves into the world of EMDR therapy. Side note: I will never understand parents whose love is conditional on their child not being gay!

[Sharon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sometimes I am critical of graphic trauma memoir; they are clearly cathartic for the author but not always a good book to read. This isn't one of those. I mean, ok yes it is the author's journey of confronting their experience and working through; but the author is a researcher, and there is solid information about therapies and conditions. This is a book that is interesting to read and might help someone seeking a way to process their own situation. Art works very well too.

[Diana Flores]

Advance Reader Copy courtesy of Edelweiss+ and the publisher. Publication date: April 2025

Sometimes rating memoirs is hard! I recognize the work the author put into this book, and the trauma she describes, and don't want to discount any of that by assigning a certain number of stars to the work. I will leave this one as 'read' without a star rating.

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't usually read memoirs, but this one intrigued me, being a former badass myself.

It's Cara's story about owning her trauma experience and learning to love and find herself back through her therapy.

One thing I've learned through my own process, is to respect that I am doing my best, whether it's my best of 50% of my capacity one day, or my best of 30% of my capacity another day.

TW for sexual assault, grief.

Thank you to to the publisher for the complimentary e-copy of this book. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.

[Anne Shirley · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book spoke oceans through monologues and smart illustrations. It grips you in the tension and make you sense every emotion that character goes through. This book is an exceptional work with profound impact.

[Artnoose McMoose · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked this up because I saw it on the new shelf in the library. A sexual assault survivor throws herself into overworking to distract herself from trauma, and then when that stops working, a therapist helps he try something new.

[❀ nyah ❀ · Rating 5 out of 5]

not what i expected, exactly what i needed. i’ll recommend this to anyone who feels lost and doesn’t know why, especially if they don’t like reading long books. this one is a comic that isn’t overly complex but definitely intentional and creatively produced. i loved it.

[Hannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

sexual assault TW

not sure where this was recommended to me but it was a heavy, quick read that gave me a lot to think about.

“i am loving myself into becoming more and more me.”

[Jen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Perfection. You should be a therapist!

[Raven Black · Rating 3 out of 5]

A personal read. You take from it what you put into it. Trigger warnings.

[SassieMolassie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a good read, but it was definitely a rough read. I had to take a couple of breaks to finish because the subject matter was upsetting for me. I do recommend it though.

[Jessica Nish · Rating 4 out of 5]

I appreciated the authors approach when trying to help her calm her brain down. I struggle to do the same and want to try to implement some better strategies!

[kiki thelibrarian · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not what I thought it was - a book about overwork and burnout rather than trauma bypassing through overwork - but still SO good and SO relatable on a psycho-emotional coping level. HUGE trigger warning for SA.

[Christine · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book gave voice to experiences that I have not seen recognized elsewhere in literature (tonic immobility) and also expanded the resources on trauma. By doing so, it helped others to know they are not alone, increased awareness of these experiences, and provided emotional support through community.

It is a quick, worthwhile read!