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Girl, Groomed: A Therapist's Memoir of Trauma
Fans of Lori Gottlieb’s, Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, and horse lovers alike will appreciate this therapist’s intimate journey in “the other chair” as she strives to untangle the trauma from her equestrian childhood that now threatens her marriage.
Raw and riveting, Girl, Groomed is seasoned psychotherapist Carol Odell’s
evolving story of coming to terms with the impacts of her own history of sexual
abuse and violence at the hands of a predatory horse trainer who, for far too much of her young life, held all the reins. Set in the equestrian world of Virginia, this candid memoir details how, starting at ten years old, Carol falls under the spell of Clarentine, the charismatic—and explosively violent—owner of the stables just down the hill from her house. In tandem with that story, Carol examines the multi-faceted consequences of the complex trauma that resulted from
the exploitive relationship Clarentine cultivated with her—including the resulting crisis she blindly imposes on her marriage. Chapters toggle back and forth between scenes of her childhood growing up jumping horses on the show circuit and the therapy sessions she later undergoes as an adult.
Using her own journey as an example, Carol demonstrates in this insightful memoir how unintegrated trauma limits us and our connection with others—and how the work of uncovering and reintegrating “what we do with what happens to us” can become the very source of our liberation.
Raw and riveting, Girl, Groomed is seasoned psychotherapist Carol Odell’s
evolving story of coming to terms with the impacts of her own history of sexual
abuse and violence at the hands of a predatory horse trainer who, for far too much of her young life, held all the reins. Set in the equestrian world of Virginia, this candid memoir details how, starting at ten years old, Carol falls under the spell of Clarentine, the charismatic—and explosively violent—owner of the stables just down the hill from her house. In tandem with that story, Carol examines the multi-faceted consequences of the complex trauma that resulted from
the exploitive relationship Clarentine cultivated with her—including the resulting crisis she blindly imposes on her marriage. Chapters toggle back and forth between scenes of her childhood growing up jumping horses on the show circuit and the therapy sessions she later undergoes as an adult.
Using her own journey as an example, Carol demonstrates in this insightful memoir how unintegrated trauma limits us and our connection with others—and how the work of uncovering and reintegrating “what we do with what happens to us” can become the very source of our liberation.
232 pages, Paperback
Published April 22, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
July 15, 2025
Girl, Groomed: A therapist memoir.... is honestly heartbreaking. I truly hope that this novel was cathartic and helped Odell continue to heal from her trauma. I can't even begin to comprehend how hard her experiences were to live through and then also to find the courage to come forward and speak her truth.
The main reasons why I am rating the book on the lower scale was simply due to the fact of how the story bounces around. It seemed to take a bit of time to get to the real message in the book. Another thing was that I struggled to connect emotionally with Odell, don't get me wrong I hate what she and others experienced but the writing was very clinical and it made it hard for me to create an emotional connection to her and her story.
Overall, I'm happy she wrote it and I'm happy to have read it. I hope it helped her heal and I can only hope it helps other victims of grooming and SA on their own journeys of healing as well.
I received a copy in exchange for my honest review.
The main reasons why I am rating the book on the lower scale was simply due to the fact of how the story bounces around. It seemed to take a bit of time to get to the real message in the book. Another thing was that I struggled to connect emotionally with Odell, don't get me wrong I hate what she and others experienced but the writing was very clinical and it made it hard for me to create an emotional connection to her and her story.
Overall, I'm happy she wrote it and I'm happy to have read it. I hope it helped her heal and I can only hope it helps other victims of grooming and SA on their own journeys of healing as well.
I received a copy in exchange for my honest review.
November 5, 2025
Carol Odell’s Girl, Groomed is a compelling story of how a horse trainer gradually groomed young girls learning to ride at his stables for sexual abuse, and the long-lasting impact of this abuse. The horses, the stables, and the countryside are beautifully depicted, and the interactions between human protagonists are portrayed in all their complexity. The cruelty of the horse trainer (not only to the girls but also to the horses) is sickening, but at the same time the author manages to convey the man’s charm. In depicting the interactions with her parents who don’t read the signs of ongoing abuse, the author writes with the insights of a trained therapist and the prose of a novelist. Those of us who have not personally experienced sexual abuse sometimes have difficulty understanding the process by which abusers overcome a victim’s resistance and prevent adults close to the abused youngster from coming to her defense. Although the setting of the abuse perpetuated by Epstein and Maxwell was massage rooms rather than a horse-stable, reading Girl, Groomed enabled me to truly comprehend (intellectually and emotionally) the torture they imposed on young victims and how difficult it is to overcome the overwhelming pain and build constructive relationships in later life. Highly recommended!
May 25, 2025
Book Review: Girl, Groomed: A Therapist’s Memoir of Trauma by Carol Odell, LICSW
Carol Odell’s Girl, Groomed is a courageous yet uneven memoir that straddles the line between personal catharsis and clinical analysis. While Odell’s raw honesty in recounting her experience of childhood grooming and abuse is commendable, the narrative’s execution occasionally undermines its emotional impact. The book’s strengths lie in its unflinching vulnerability and unique dual perspective as both survivor and therapist, but structural and stylistic choices may limit its resonance with some readers.
Key Themes & Insights
Courage in Vulnerability
Odell deserves immense respect for exposing her trauma—including moments where she critiques her own silence—knowing it could provoke reader discomfort. Her reflections on cult-like mind control and systemic failures are particularly incisive.
Structural Challenges
The memoir’s nonlinear pacing and dense detail often obscure its core message. At times, it took a long time to get to the point, with superfluous passages diluting the emotional weight of key moments.
Emotional Disconnect
Surprisingly, given the heavy subject matter, the prose sometimes distances rather than immerses. The clinical lens—while valuable for therapists—may alienate general readers seeking deeper emotional connection.
Systemic Critique
Odell’s indictment of institutional failures (legal, familial) is a standout. Her abuser’s ability to “fall through the cracks” raises urgent questions about accountability—a thread that deserved even sharper focus.
Audience & Value
★★★☆☆ (3.5/5)
-For trauma survivors, the book validates complex feelings of guilt and paralysis, though its pacing may frustrate.
-For clinicians, it offers a rare case study on therapist self-disclosure and the limits of traditional healing.
-For general readers, the blend of memoir and therapy jargon may feel disjointed—yet its honesty remains impactful.
How would I describe this book?
- A therapist’s memoir that exposes grooming’s scars—and the systems that enable it.
- Flawed but brave: Odell’s story challenges survivors and saviors alike.
- More clinical than cathartic, yet vital for trauma discourse.
Gratitude & Critique
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advance copy. While Girl, Groomed didn’t fully resonate with me, its importance is undeniable. As Odell writes, “Trauma rewires the voice before it rewrites the story”—a truth this memoir embodies, even in its imperfections.
Final Thought:
Odell’s work will deeply connect with some readers, particularly those navigating similar trauma or therapeutic fields. For others, its execution may hinder the emotional payoff expected from such harrowing material. Yet its core message—about silence, survival, and systemic brokenness—lingers long after the last page.
Suggested Companion Reads: What My Bones Know (Foo) for a more narrative-driven trauma memoir, or The Body Keeps the Score (van der Kolk) for clinical depth.
Carol Odell’s Girl, Groomed is a courageous yet uneven memoir that straddles the line between personal catharsis and clinical analysis. While Odell’s raw honesty in recounting her experience of childhood grooming and abuse is commendable, the narrative’s execution occasionally undermines its emotional impact. The book’s strengths lie in its unflinching vulnerability and unique dual perspective as both survivor and therapist, but structural and stylistic choices may limit its resonance with some readers.
Key Themes & Insights
Courage in Vulnerability
Odell deserves immense respect for exposing her trauma—including moments where she critiques her own silence—knowing it could provoke reader discomfort. Her reflections on cult-like mind control and systemic failures are particularly incisive.
Structural Challenges
The memoir’s nonlinear pacing and dense detail often obscure its core message. At times, it took a long time to get to the point, with superfluous passages diluting the emotional weight of key moments.
Emotional Disconnect
Surprisingly, given the heavy subject matter, the prose sometimes distances rather than immerses. The clinical lens—while valuable for therapists—may alienate general readers seeking deeper emotional connection.
Systemic Critique
Odell’s indictment of institutional failures (legal, familial) is a standout. Her abuser’s ability to “fall through the cracks” raises urgent questions about accountability—a thread that deserved even sharper focus.
Audience & Value
★★★☆☆ (3.5/5)
-For trauma survivors, the book validates complex feelings of guilt and paralysis, though its pacing may frustrate.
-For clinicians, it offers a rare case study on therapist self-disclosure and the limits of traditional healing.
-For general readers, the blend of memoir and therapy jargon may feel disjointed—yet its honesty remains impactful.
How would I describe this book?
- A therapist’s memoir that exposes grooming’s scars—and the systems that enable it.
- Flawed but brave: Odell’s story challenges survivors and saviors alike.
- More clinical than cathartic, yet vital for trauma discourse.
Gratitude & Critique
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advance copy. While Girl, Groomed didn’t fully resonate with me, its importance is undeniable. As Odell writes, “Trauma rewires the voice before it rewrites the story”—a truth this memoir embodies, even in its imperfections.
Final Thought:
Odell’s work will deeply connect with some readers, particularly those navigating similar trauma or therapeutic fields. For others, its execution may hinder the emotional payoff expected from such harrowing material. Yet its core message—about silence, survival, and systemic brokenness—lingers long after the last page.
Suggested Companion Reads: What My Bones Know (Foo) for a more narrative-driven trauma memoir, or The Body Keeps the Score (van der Kolk) for clinical depth.
September 30, 2025
Carol Odell’s Girl, Groomed is a raw and unflinching memoir that traces her childhood experiences of grooming and abuse at a horse stable, the deep love she had for horses, and the long, painful process of understanding how that past shaped her adult life and relationships. Odell moves between her girlhood innocence, where horses offered her comfort and belonging, and the unsettling reality of how her trust was exploited. As she grows into adulthood, she reckons with the trauma, explores how it bled into her marriage and identity, and shows how therapy, reflection, and courage helped her reframe her story.
The writing is vivid, sometimes almost cinematic, and the way Odell describes both the beauty of horses and the darkness of abuse made me feel pulled in two directions at once. There were moments where I found myself smiling at her descriptions of childhood wonder, then seconds later reeling from the cruelty and manipulation woven into those same memories. I admired her honesty, but I also found myself feeling frustrated on her behalf, angry at how easily her vulnerability was taken advantage of, and heartbroken that the safe space she longed for was the same place that hurt her.
What impressed me most was how Odell refuses to simplify her story. She doesn’t paint herself as a perfect victim. She shows her younger self caught in admiration for her abuser, which was difficult to read but also profoundly true. That honesty made the book feel even more important because it illustrates the messy, confusing ways trauma imprints on us. I appreciated the way she linked her past to her marriage struggles later in life, and I found myself pausing often to reflect on how our old, unexamined wounds shape the way we love, fight, and cope.
I would recommend this book to readers who want a deeply personal exploration of trauma and survival, but also to anyone interested in the psychology of how abuse and grooming take root. It’s not an easy read, but it’s an essential one. I think therapists, survivors, and anyone willing to confront hard truths will find it valuable. It left me unsettled and hopeful at the same time, which to me is the mark of a powerful memoir.
The writing is vivid, sometimes almost cinematic, and the way Odell describes both the beauty of horses and the darkness of abuse made me feel pulled in two directions at once. There were moments where I found myself smiling at her descriptions of childhood wonder, then seconds later reeling from the cruelty and manipulation woven into those same memories. I admired her honesty, but I also found myself feeling frustrated on her behalf, angry at how easily her vulnerability was taken advantage of, and heartbroken that the safe space she longed for was the same place that hurt her.
What impressed me most was how Odell refuses to simplify her story. She doesn’t paint herself as a perfect victim. She shows her younger self caught in admiration for her abuser, which was difficult to read but also profoundly true. That honesty made the book feel even more important because it illustrates the messy, confusing ways trauma imprints on us. I appreciated the way she linked her past to her marriage struggles later in life, and I found myself pausing often to reflect on how our old, unexamined wounds shape the way we love, fight, and cope.
I would recommend this book to readers who want a deeply personal exploration of trauma and survival, but also to anyone interested in the psychology of how abuse and grooming take root. It’s not an easy read, but it’s an essential one. I think therapists, survivors, and anyone willing to confront hard truths will find it valuable. It left me unsettled and hopeful at the same time, which to me is the mark of a powerful memoir.
April 16, 2025
This was an interesting read for me. I want to start by saying that I respect the author for putting this out into the world. It could not have been easy to write, and I hope that it proved to be therapeutic for her on some level.
That being said, I have mixed emotions about the book. It sort of jumped around and it provided a lot of detail that felt superfluous. It felt like it took a long time to get to the message the book was trying to impart. The things that went on in this book were awful, but something about the way it was written made it very hard for me to connect to emotionally (which is not usually the case for me with books that deal with such heavy topics).
I did like that the author was honest about her experiences, even in situations that didn’t paint her in the best light. I felt some disappointment that she didn’t say anything (especially as she got older), knowing that she could’ve potentially saved others from suffering the same abuses she did. That said, her explanations of how her psyche was affected long-term and the way the mind-control she experienced was similar to that of a cult, I do realize that my disappointment may be unfair and misplaced. Where my real anger lies is with Clarentine, the man who committed these atrocities against an unknown amount of young women. It’s also awful to see how the legal system let him get off far too easily from the crime he committed (including multiple murders). How does that happen? How does someone like that fall through the cracks? How does he get away with sexually abusing who knows how many children without getting reported or punished?
This wasn’t a bad book and it did have an important message buried within its pages, there was just something about the execution that made it a slog for me to get through and never brought out the deep emotions I’d normally feel with a book of this subject matter. I do, however, think there are people out there who will connect to it deeply; it just wasn’t a good fit for me personally.
That being said, I have mixed emotions about the book. It sort of jumped around and it provided a lot of detail that felt superfluous. It felt like it took a long time to get to the message the book was trying to impart. The things that went on in this book were awful, but something about the way it was written made it very hard for me to connect to emotionally (which is not usually the case for me with books that deal with such heavy topics).
I did like that the author was honest about her experiences, even in situations that didn’t paint her in the best light. I felt some disappointment that she didn’t say anything (especially as she got older), knowing that she could’ve potentially saved others from suffering the same abuses she did. That said, her explanations of how her psyche was affected long-term and the way the mind-control she experienced was similar to that of a cult, I do realize that my disappointment may be unfair and misplaced. Where my real anger lies is with Clarentine, the man who committed these atrocities against an unknown amount of young women. It’s also awful to see how the legal system let him get off far too easily from the crime he committed (including multiple murders). How does that happen? How does someone like that fall through the cracks? How does he get away with sexually abusing who knows how many children without getting reported or punished?
This wasn’t a bad book and it did have an important message buried within its pages, there was just something about the execution that made it a slog for me to get through and never brought out the deep emotions I’d normally feel with a book of this subject matter. I do, however, think there are people out there who will connect to it deeply; it just wasn’t a good fit for me personally.
November 26, 2025
Raw, Revealing, Rueful
Carol Odell’s powerful memoir Girl, Groomed is a self-examination of her childhood experiences with ponies and horses along with a sexually abusive trainer. A therapist herself, the author, re-examines her childhood beginning at age ten when her parents move to horse country near Charlottesville, Virginia. She toggles back and forth in time from the point that she realizes in a marriage counseling session that she is contributing to problems in her marriage.
The trainer/predator, a disgusting man who never wears shirts, chews tobacco and spits it out, and drinks alcohol disguised in a coke bottle, makes her uncomfortable from the beginning even though she doesn’t have enough information to understand abuse. As she grows older she begins to understand the underlying nature of the discomfort and recognizes the sexual innuendos, then overt negotiation for sex. The trainer/predator uses all kinds of threats; withholding their favorite horses, not allowing them in their favorite competitions, and pitting the girls against each other. As the reader sees the progression it’s easy to understand how this went on for years and years and why the author and the other girls formed a “don’t tell” conspiracy with their parents.
Ms. Odell, a skilled therapist, closely examines her parents’ role in her childhood trauma, describing how each was unwilling to view the reality of what was going on “in the barn.” The final few chapters deal with how she deals with the trauma by writing an unmailed letter to the predator, writing an article the trauma in a respected equine journal, returning to her childhood home and the stables, and importantly, connecting with other victims. It’s an excellent and thorough study of her trauma that would be beneficial to counselors, victims, and ordinary readers. It held my attention from the first sentence to the last.
Carol Odell’s powerful memoir Girl, Groomed is a self-examination of her childhood experiences with ponies and horses along with a sexually abusive trainer. A therapist herself, the author, re-examines her childhood beginning at age ten when her parents move to horse country near Charlottesville, Virginia. She toggles back and forth in time from the point that she realizes in a marriage counseling session that she is contributing to problems in her marriage.
The trainer/predator, a disgusting man who never wears shirts, chews tobacco and spits it out, and drinks alcohol disguised in a coke bottle, makes her uncomfortable from the beginning even though she doesn’t have enough information to understand abuse. As she grows older she begins to understand the underlying nature of the discomfort and recognizes the sexual innuendos, then overt negotiation for sex. The trainer/predator uses all kinds of threats; withholding their favorite horses, not allowing them in their favorite competitions, and pitting the girls against each other. As the reader sees the progression it’s easy to understand how this went on for years and years and why the author and the other girls formed a “don’t tell” conspiracy with their parents.
Ms. Odell, a skilled therapist, closely examines her parents’ role in her childhood trauma, describing how each was unwilling to view the reality of what was going on “in the barn.” The final few chapters deal with how she deals with the trauma by writing an unmailed letter to the predator, writing an article the trauma in a respected equine journal, returning to her childhood home and the stables, and importantly, connecting with other victims. It’s an excellent and thorough study of her trauma that would be beneficial to counselors, victims, and ordinary readers. It held my attention from the first sentence to the last.
June 15, 2025
Girl, Groomed: A Therapist's Memoir of Trauma
Girl, Groomed, A Therapist's Memoir of Trauma, by Carol Odell, LICSW, is a memoir set in Virginia in the 1980's, where we follow Carol, a now psychotherapist who shares her personal account of being groomed and abused by her horse trainer as the then child through to teenager years, and how this silenced trauma deeply impacts her and her marriage many years later. We learn that therapy helps her find freedom and is eventually set free from her past.
I choose to read this 200 paged book because I have never read a book relating to the equestrian world. I also want to understand the different ways people cope with trauma experienced from childhood, and how this undealt, open flowing but invisible wound act out later on in life, and in adult relationships, if any.
I admire the author for sharing her trauma, and her passion for horses. I like how she presents the matter through herself as a child, as a therapist, and as a wife/client of therapy. However, I would have loved to read further information about the therapy sessions itself had this been more available. How she dealt with it as a little girl made me sad but I understand why she did so. I would recommend this book as it has made me understand why people act they way they do in certain situations, which I had never thought of, nor understood before.
Thank you NetGalley, She Writes Press and the author Carol, for letting me read and review this insightful book for free. I am grateful and I enjoy being part of this beautiful network. Many thanks all. Onto the next!
Girl, Groomed, A Therapist's Memoir of Trauma, by Carol Odell, LICSW, is a memoir set in Virginia in the 1980's, where we follow Carol, a now psychotherapist who shares her personal account of being groomed and abused by her horse trainer as the then child through to teenager years, and how this silenced trauma deeply impacts her and her marriage many years later. We learn that therapy helps her find freedom and is eventually set free from her past.
I choose to read this 200 paged book because I have never read a book relating to the equestrian world. I also want to understand the different ways people cope with trauma experienced from childhood, and how this undealt, open flowing but invisible wound act out later on in life, and in adult relationships, if any.
I admire the author for sharing her trauma, and her passion for horses. I like how she presents the matter through herself as a child, as a therapist, and as a wife/client of therapy. However, I would have loved to read further information about the therapy sessions itself had this been more available. How she dealt with it as a little girl made me sad but I understand why she did so. I would recommend this book as it has made me understand why people act they way they do in certain situations, which I had never thought of, nor understood before.
Thank you NetGalley, She Writes Press and the author Carol, for letting me read and review this insightful book for free. I am grateful and I enjoy being part of this beautiful network. Many thanks all. Onto the next!
July 18, 2025
Thank you to NetGalley for allowing me to read the e-pub! I felt so honored to have read such an immensely personal memoir.
I never quite imagined that the world of equestrians could be so tragic. Carol Odell's story deals with her heavy experiences of grooming, abuse, SA and taking responsibility for how her unhealed past has infiltrated her personal life.
In the beginning, I can't lie I was struggling a bit because I was expecting us to jump into the story sooner but as I continued, I realized how important it was that we were given all of the details. There was a lot of figurative writing as well and I didn't really think it was necessary because I was more interested in hearing her story rather than needing a descriptive picture at all times but that faded out quickly.
I really loved the progress though throughout the book and it felt a lot like we as readers were healing alongside her. Her relationship with her parents unfortunately hit far too hard and close to home. I've never heard anyone describe the extreme-anxious-mother and people-pleasing-father duo so well.
Clarentine, I'm trying to keep my goodreads account from being banned but you deserve absolutely nothing but the worst burning in hell with absolutely no mercy.
I'm so glad that Carol shared her story and that it reached others who needed to know that they were not alone in this. All of the shame that she didn't speak up sooner shouldn't be there. She's made her difference now and that's important. I hope that all of the girls who went through the abuse are all in a better and healed space now. Nobody deserves what happened to them.
This book was incredibly somber and heart-breaking but so worth the read. I would highly recommend it. This is for the girls and women who have doubted themselves. <3
I never quite imagined that the world of equestrians could be so tragic. Carol Odell's story deals with her heavy experiences of grooming, abuse, SA and taking responsibility for how her unhealed past has infiltrated her personal life.
In the beginning, I can't lie I was struggling a bit because I was expecting us to jump into the story sooner but as I continued, I realized how important it was that we were given all of the details. There was a lot of figurative writing as well and I didn't really think it was necessary because I was more interested in hearing her story rather than needing a descriptive picture at all times but that faded out quickly.
I really loved the progress though throughout the book and it felt a lot like we as readers were healing alongside her. Her relationship with her parents unfortunately hit far too hard and close to home. I've never heard anyone describe the extreme-anxious-mother and people-pleasing-father duo so well.
Clarentine, I'm trying to keep my goodreads account from being banned but you deserve absolutely nothing but the worst burning in hell with absolutely no mercy.
I'm so glad that Carol shared her story and that it reached others who needed to know that they were not alone in this. All of the shame that she didn't speak up sooner shouldn't be there. She's made her difference now and that's important. I hope that all of the girls who went through the abuse are all in a better and healed space now. Nobody deserves what happened to them.
This book was incredibly somber and heart-breaking but so worth the read. I would highly recommend it. This is for the girls and women who have doubted themselves. <3
July 15, 2025
When Carol was a little girl, her neighbor offered free riding lessons to the neighborhood girls. While he received any money they won at competitions, he didn't ask for anything else except the adults' trust and unfettered access to the girls. He was grooming them.
This memoir delves into the intricacies of the grooming process, including desensitization to sexual comments, touch, etc. I've not read anyone else describe grooming in this much detail.
The narrative goes back and forth between different time periods, showing the ways in which what the horse trainer did to Carol impacted her life, including marriage, addictions, and more.
As a survivor, I appreciate reading a book where someone recounts the damaging grooming process, the trauma bonding (Stockholm Syndrome) and the ways in which the abuser silences victims. Some of the ways my abuser groomed me were similar, and it helps to see that I'm not alone.
Thank you to the author, Carol Odell, for writing this memoir. Thank you also to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC!
This memoir delves into the intricacies of the grooming process, including desensitization to sexual comments, touch, etc. I've not read anyone else describe grooming in this much detail.
The narrative goes back and forth between different time periods, showing the ways in which what the horse trainer did to Carol impacted her life, including marriage, addictions, and more.
As a survivor, I appreciate reading a book where someone recounts the damaging grooming process, the trauma bonding (Stockholm Syndrome) and the ways in which the abuser silences victims. Some of the ways my abuser groomed me were similar, and it helps to see that I'm not alone.
Thank you to the author, Carol Odell, for writing this memoir. Thank you also to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC!
July 28, 2025
Carol Odell’s Girl Groomed is a brave, unflinching memoir that peels back the layers of buried trauma with remarkable honesty and grace. As both a survivor and a therapist, Odell brings insight and authenticity to her story, weaving together the past and present in a way that’s both skillful and deeply affecting.
When she’s unexpectedly forced out of her home amidst a marital crisis, Odell finds herself confronting the abuse she experienced in her youth—memories she thought she’d long locked away. What follows is a powerful #MeToo journey of reckoning and reclamation, told with clarity and compassion.
One of the most moving aspects of her healing process is her return to horses through equine therapy. These moments not only rekindle her childhood joy but also serve as poignant metaphors for trust, strength, and connection.
This is ultimately a story of hope. Odell offers readers a hard-earned but uplifting ending. Girl Groomed isn’t just a memoir—it’s a mirror, a map, and a message: that healing is possible, if we want it badly enough and are willing to put in the work.
When she’s unexpectedly forced out of her home amidst a marital crisis, Odell finds herself confronting the abuse she experienced in her youth—memories she thought she’d long locked away. What follows is a powerful #MeToo journey of reckoning and reclamation, told with clarity and compassion.
One of the most moving aspects of her healing process is her return to horses through equine therapy. These moments not only rekindle her childhood joy but also serve as poignant metaphors for trust, strength, and connection.
This is ultimately a story of hope. Odell offers readers a hard-earned but uplifting ending. Girl Groomed isn’t just a memoir—it’s a mirror, a map, and a message: that healing is possible, if we want it badly enough and are willing to put in the work.
April 28, 2025
Girl Groomed by Carol Odell, LISCW is a memoir from a psychotherapist who is realizing she was abused by a horse trainer as a young girl. In this book we get flashes from the past and also from the present as she undergoes therapy to try to cope with the trauma that happened to her as a child. This was an emotional read for readers. I found the equine knowledge that author has, interesting since I don't know much about horses, However the story does not make a lot of sense to me as a victim of sexual abuse, there are sexual behaviors and then there is grooming/inappropriate touching as this author experienced. I do agree she went through some tough things with the horse trainer but the rape she endured was more sexually abusive than that horse grooming thing. So it surprises me to hear a lot about the horse trainer and how he impacted all of the author's life and not the rapist at all. This was not for me as a book and I am rating it as such.
January 11, 2025
Finding Light After the Darkness--
In this heartfelt, brave and insightful memoir, the author, Carol Odell, explores her childhood experience of an abusive horse-riding teacher in Virginia, weaving a narrative that delves into the allure of the barn, her family’s unspoken failures, and the psychological defenses that shaped her life. With the precision of a counselor, she unpacks the stages of recognizing abuse, processing its impact, and finding a path to healing. From her transformative connection with horse therapy to confronting her past, mending her marriage, this memoir offers a compelling guide for resilience and self-awareness. Poignant, informative, and deeply moving, this is a well written story I highly recommend. This review is based on an advanced copy I received from the author.
In this heartfelt, brave and insightful memoir, the author, Carol Odell, explores her childhood experience of an abusive horse-riding teacher in Virginia, weaving a narrative that delves into the allure of the barn, her family’s unspoken failures, and the psychological defenses that shaped her life. With the precision of a counselor, she unpacks the stages of recognizing abuse, processing its impact, and finding a path to healing. From her transformative connection with horse therapy to confronting her past, mending her marriage, this memoir offers a compelling guide for resilience and self-awareness. Poignant, informative, and deeply moving, this is a well written story I highly recommend. This review is based on an advanced copy I received from the author.
June 20, 2025
Beautifully written, this memoir shows how a man in a position of authority and power, one who elicited the trust of young girls, abused that position and the trusting, innocent girls in his care. The story weaves back and forth from the author's young years to her adult marriage, showing how the impact of the grooming and abuse shows up years later in her marriage, putting it at risk. Although shown through the lens of a therapist, the writing is personal and vulnerable. And, sadly, all too relatable. I applaud the author for putting this book into the world to help shine a light on the impact of abuse on young, innocent children and the insidiousness of the grooming process. The book is also inspiring, as it shows that healing from grooming and abuse is possible and that resources are available to support this process.
February 17, 2025
In Girl, Groomed, Odell describes in spare, beautiful prose the legacy of trauma passed down through families and the insidious power dynamic of abuse, both sexual and emotional. She paints both the heart-breaking personal experience of abuse and the cultural norms which sanctify it in the name of patriarchal hierarchy. As a therapist, Odell peels back these horrific dynamics with tremendous wisdom and courage. Her dedicated work on herself and her marriage shines through the story as a beacon to all who have survived trauma in any form. Her crisp, clear language both delights and reveals in wonderful sensory detail the equestrian world: its smells, its muck, its joy, its dangers. This is a transformative, soul-baring book about a healing journey that needs to be read.
March 9, 2025
A powerful story, gracefully told. Carol Odell's abuse at the hand of a violent man, and by the subtle complacency of society, is chilling and heartbreaking. But the ability of the author to recognize the impact the abuse takes on her and her marriage, and the strength she summons to rewrite her destiny is beautiful, affirming and inspiring. Throughout the book, the textures and smells of the competitive equestrian world mixed with her teenage life in rural Virginia make for vivid and colorful storytelling. We find ourselves rooting for her and for the magnificent animals she rides, which makes the ending of the book all the more satisfying. Hats off to Ms. Odell for a sharing her beautiful memoir and for having the courage to make the life choices she does. Bravo.
June 25, 2025
Girl, Groomed is a fascinating memoir with no shortage of surprising twists and turns. Among the many books on healing from trauma, this one, by Carol Odell, stands out. Most are written by survivors or therapists. Odell is both a seasoned psychotherapist and a survivor of being groomed and abused for years by her beloved horse trainer. Through skillful writing and courageous self-disclosure, she shows us how trauma can go unnoticed or ignored by victims and parents for decades, how victims of trauma can become abusers, and how she found the humility and strength to face those painful truths in order to save her marriage. On a horse and on the page, Odell goes all out, taking risks and jumping hurdles to win trophies and reclaim her soul. Highly recommended.
July 2, 2025
Girl, Groomed, is a self-reflective memoir as Carol O’Dell shows us how her love of horses ultimately helped her to love herself. Beautifully written, Ms. O’Dell’s vulnerability is to be commended. She shares with keen insight how as a child and teenager, she could make excuses for the inappropriate sexual advances of a much older man, her mentor at the horse stable where she rode, until circumstances in adulthood forced her to realize how the denial was no longer working in her favor. This is a book about how, I believe, many children cope with surviving childhood trauma and it is a book to be read by anyone who wants to understand that despite these worst case scenarios, healing can occur.
September 5, 2025
Girl Groomed is a incredible memoir that stayed with me for days. The author's voice is remarkably strong and clear, showing a woman who has wrestled with and overcome the ghosts and demons of a difficult adolescence. This beautiful story details her journey under the domination of a cruel, cult-like figure, a period during which she was unprotected by her parents.
This book is a triumphant reclamation of her innocence and a testament to her strength in climbing out of that ugly muck. It serves as a clarion call to protect the innocent and to trust your inner voice when something feels wrong. This true story is a gift of wisdom and healing. Author Odell’s courageous and honest journey of soul-searching and facing painful truths is powerful.
This book is a triumphant reclamation of her innocence and a testament to her strength in climbing out of that ugly muck. It serves as a clarion call to protect the innocent and to trust your inner voice when something feels wrong. This true story is a gift of wisdom and healing. Author Odell’s courageous and honest journey of soul-searching and facing painful truths is powerful.
January 24, 2025
Odell does what few other authors of sexual abuse memoirs do: she presents her story from the combined perspectives of a victim/survivor and as a psychotherapist. It works, and readers––whether sexual abuse survivors themselves or not––come away with gems of insight to help them, as Odell writes, “to show up differently to change the entrenched system that is invested in keeping it all the same.” Her writing is clear and compelling, leaving readers more informed and feeling much better for having read her stand-out memoir, Girl, Groomed. ––Patricia Eagle, author of Being Mean, A Memoir of Sexual Abuse and Survival and Dog Love Stories, The Canines Who Changed Me
February 19, 2025
Carol Odell writes a memorable memoir. She describes her early passion for horses with the good fortune living "up the hill" from a horse trainer; she lived her dream riding and competing.
Over time however, it became clear that something was "not right".
Untangling her experiences with her trainer, and coming to terms with the profound impact of that relationship, is a powerful and poignant story that speaks to her strength and resilience. Her knowledge as a psychotherapist and her writer's ability to share her insights give us a remarkable read.
Over time however, it became clear that something was "not right".
Untangling her experiences with her trainer, and coming to terms with the profound impact of that relationship, is a powerful and poignant story that speaks to her strength and resilience. Her knowledge as a psychotherapist and her writer's ability to share her insights give us a remarkable read.
December 30, 2025
Carol is groomed as a ten-year-old for eight years. She loves horses. When her family moves to Virginia, Carol discovers a horse stable that connects to her family's field. In order to work with and ride horses, Carol quickly learns she must follow the owner's abusive ways. Her parents turn a blind eye to what transpires over the years due to their own issues.
Her insight into her past as a victim and her years as a therapist make this more than a memoir. A book filled with purpose, experience, and help.
Her insight into her past as a victim and her years as a therapist make this more than a memoir. A book filled with purpose, experience, and help.
May 30, 2025
I received a copy for review. All opinions are my own. What a beautifully tragic memoir about how vile people take advantage of girls by using their authority. I feel so grateful to the author for sharing her story and her road to healing. This book really shows how trauma and events of our past can shape our present and future and the steps we must take to work through it all. This was an easy read and I finished it in one sitting because of how easy it was to follow.
June 18, 2025
I thought this to be a compelling read, very heartfelt. When she writes about a horse being beaten with a twitch that was tied up, and pulling at the rail it was tied to, it was so gripping. So sickening. She describes very well how this man used the horses as leverage in trying to get his way with the girls. I especially liked the last part, when she returns to Virginia twice, and the healing she eventually found there.
June 28, 2025
A beautifully written memoir that is a compelling read. The ending is gloriously moving and all the insights bravely shared in between are stunning in their honesty, compassion, and wisdom. The book is a generous gift to survivors of any kind of trauma. The lack of self-pity, confidence in a person's ability to learn and change, and relatable strategies for healing are deeply inspiring and motivating.
October 9, 2025
This book is a beautiful balance of memoir and helpful information about trauma, memory, and how humans so often deal with situations that are complicated, nuanced, and difficult. It is a story of uncovering past truths and recovering from past traumas. The writing is clear and elegant. For anyone healing from their own history of trauma, especially sexual abuse at a young age, I think this could be a helpful read, offering love, insight, and compassion.
October 26, 2025
This powerful memoir shows the author's adolescence as she braves the domination of a powerful male abuser to ride his horses and compete in show jumping. She keeps the ribbons, he keeps the purses, and her parents are clueless. As an adult, she struggles to uncover the effects of complex trauma that threatens to destroy her marriage. A compelling must-read for understanding abuse, trauma, and the healing power of horses.
December 16, 2024
The famous quote by William Faulkner about the past gets taken for a ride in this book! Not only does Faulkner figure briefly in this coming of age memoir about riding horses in the south, but his idea that we are trapped by the past is challenged. This therapist/writer is able to reckon with abuse, and through courageous work in the present, free herself. Highly recommended.
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April 30, 2025This was a very difficult read. The grooming that occurred was hard to read about, but I think Odell did a wonderful job explaining what happened. Not being a horse person, I was interested in that aspect but I did have some difficulty with the therapy talk. But that’s a me thing. If you’re interested in introspective memoirs, you’ll enjoy this.
July 10, 2025
This is a beautifully written, revealing account of the author's journey of experiencing, acknowledging and coming to terms with her childhood trauma of being groomed. Odell does a great job of explaining the hows and whys of this kind of trauma. Very insightful.
August 14, 2025
Girl Groomed is a well written memoir that delves into the different levels of coping with trauma. Many people may think that exposing the trauma is the end of the recovery process. Carol helps the reader understand that there are many layers to recovery for a survivor is able to move on.
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