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How to Be a Grown Up: The 14 Essential Skills You Didn’t Know You Needed
A practical guide to adult life’s greatest mysteries that were never taught in school but should have been—including how to launch your career, find your purposes (for right now), invest your money, and much more.
Though twenty- and thirty-somethings are better educated than ever before, essentially none of the topics critical to being a full-fledged adult—such as how to get a new job, create a budget, file your taxes, face rejection, and navigate family dynamics—are covered in lower or higher education. Fortunately, here is a book that does just that.
From entrepreneur Raffi Grinberg, who lived and learned the hard way throughout his twenties, here is a crash course in everything you need to know to be a grown up. Based on his wildly popular “Adulting 101” course at Boston College, Grinberg firmly steers you through the basics of being a grown up using interactive chapters, bite-size nuggets of wisdom, humor, and stories from his twenties, including nearly going broke, having bad credit, disappointing his parents, and much more. As Raffi tells his students, “I want you to have a quarter-life crisis now so that you won’t have a mid-life crisis later.”
A MUCH-NEEDED BOOK FOR YOUNG Creator and teacher of the undergraduate college course Adulting 101, Raffi Grinberg crafted a foolproof curriculum that became one of the department’s most in-demand and highest-rated classes. Like his course, this book answers a need for young people who will inevitably discover that most of what they learned in school does not apply to their lives and that the things they need to know most were never taught to them.
TIMELY ADVICE FROM A TRUSTED This is not advice from your parents’ generation. Grinberg, now in his thirties, has recently faced some of the present concerns of people in their twenties. This life skills book helps readers unlearn outdated, unrealistic advice with guidance that reflects life’s current realities and opportunities.
OUTSTANDING GRADUATION The United States is facing a loneliness crisis, a mental health crisis, a debt crisis, and a crisis of meaning. This guide proactively teaches young adults fourteen essential skills to avoid these crises in their lives and make the most of their twenties. An indispensable resource and entertaining read, How to Be a Grown Up makes an excellent self-purchase or thoughtful present for birthday, graduation, college or grad school kickoff, or job-seeking encouragement.
Perfect high school and college graduatesParents with adult childrenFans of self-help and life skills booksAnyone looking to better manage their personal finances and career opportunitiesReaders of The Defining Decade, The Alchemist, What Color Is Your Parachute?, The New Psychology of Success, The Last Lecture, and The Unspoken Rules
Though twenty- and thirty-somethings are better educated than ever before, essentially none of the topics critical to being a full-fledged adult—such as how to get a new job, create a budget, file your taxes, face rejection, and navigate family dynamics—are covered in lower or higher education. Fortunately, here is a book that does just that.
From entrepreneur Raffi Grinberg, who lived and learned the hard way throughout his twenties, here is a crash course in everything you need to know to be a grown up. Based on his wildly popular “Adulting 101” course at Boston College, Grinberg firmly steers you through the basics of being a grown up using interactive chapters, bite-size nuggets of wisdom, humor, and stories from his twenties, including nearly going broke, having bad credit, disappointing his parents, and much more. As Raffi tells his students, “I want you to have a quarter-life crisis now so that you won’t have a mid-life crisis later.”
A MUCH-NEEDED BOOK FOR YOUNG Creator and teacher of the undergraduate college course Adulting 101, Raffi Grinberg crafted a foolproof curriculum that became one of the department’s most in-demand and highest-rated classes. Like his course, this book answers a need for young people who will inevitably discover that most of what they learned in school does not apply to their lives and that the things they need to know most were never taught to them.
TIMELY ADVICE FROM A TRUSTED This is not advice from your parents’ generation. Grinberg, now in his thirties, has recently faced some of the present concerns of people in their twenties. This life skills book helps readers unlearn outdated, unrealistic advice with guidance that reflects life’s current realities and opportunities.
OUTSTANDING GRADUATION The United States is facing a loneliness crisis, a mental health crisis, a debt crisis, and a crisis of meaning. This guide proactively teaches young adults fourteen essential skills to avoid these crises in their lives and make the most of their twenties. An indispensable resource and entertaining read, How to Be a Grown Up makes an excellent self-purchase or thoughtful present for birthday, graduation, college or grad school kickoff, or job-seeking encouragement.
Perfect high school and college graduatesParents with adult childrenFans of self-help and life skills booksAnyone looking to better manage their personal finances and career opportunitiesReaders of The Defining Decade, The Alchemist, What Color Is Your Parachute?, The New Psychology of Success, The Last Lecture, and The Unspoken Rules
272 pages, Hardcover
Published March 25, 2025
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
December 4, 2024
I picked up this book thinking: "I wonder how much of this information will be new to me, at 40-years-old," and although I've learned quite a bit of what's offered in this quick little book, there was indeed some new-to-me advice and knowledge offered in the pages of #HowtoBeaGrownUp. . .and OH! how I wished I'd read this before having to learn all the stuff I DID already know the hard way!
With that said, this little manual packs in a ton of super-useful facts and ideals, from Mental/Emotional and Relationship Skills, to Financial and Career Skills, and I found it very interesting and easy to read—but I'm not sure I would have actually given it the time in my youth, simply because Young-Koda didn't touch non-fiction, and was even less interested in self-help topics.
I think this book is important, though...and even if the majority of young adults don't dive headfirst into its wisdom, I hope that their parents will still give it a read-through so that they will be able to do what they can to pass these lessons down to their children.
One thing I wish was different about the book is: I wish that the Financial Chapters were placed at the end, instead of in the middle. It's important to note that, while the other chapters in this book provide skills that are universally relevant, the Financial Chapters will only be relevant to Americans. I think putting this section after the Career Section would have helped market to other countries (who can skip the Financial Section unless they want to educate themselves on American Credit, Investments, Insurance, and Taxes). In the final pages of the book, the author mentions some lessons that they weren't able to fit in this volume, and the one that stands out the most in my head is: "Dealing With the Loss of Loved Ones." I think this topic could have easily merged with the mental, emotional, and relationship advice given in those corresponding chapters, and I wish the author, editor, and/or publisher would have considered splitting the financial and career pieces into another book, so that the subjects that were left out could have been included in this one, as they would marry so well with the Mental and Relationship Skills which appear in this volume, and so that people outside of the U.S. could have had a text that would have been wholly relevant to them. And to be honest, the writing and pacing of the book was good enough that I wouldn't have been mad if everything had been squeezed into the same book, making it a bit longer.
One of the best resources this book has to offer are the exercises and "homework assignments" given with each Skill Lesson. Not only does this book give great advise, but it encourages the reader to put those skills into practice, one lesson at a time. I will be very interested to see a second volume from Raffi Grinberg on "How to Be a Grown Up," because I'll definitely read it!
Thanks so much to #NetGalley, Raffi Grinberg, and Chronicle Books/Chronicle Prism for providing me with an advanced copy of this vital piece of literature in return for an honest review. I sincerely hope the book does well, and that many people benefit from its wisdom—(that kids coming out of High School and/or going into College will be more interested in picking it up than I would have been at their age/s) and that Raffi DOES put out another volume at some point!
With that said, this little manual packs in a ton of super-useful facts and ideals, from Mental/Emotional and Relationship Skills, to Financial and Career Skills, and I found it very interesting and easy to read—but I'm not sure I would have actually given it the time in my youth, simply because Young-Koda didn't touch non-fiction, and was even less interested in self-help topics.
I think this book is important, though...and even if the majority of young adults don't dive headfirst into its wisdom, I hope that their parents will still give it a read-through so that they will be able to do what they can to pass these lessons down to their children.
One thing I wish was different about the book is: I wish that the Financial Chapters were placed at the end, instead of in the middle. It's important to note that, while the other chapters in this book provide skills that are universally relevant, the Financial Chapters will only be relevant to Americans. I think putting this section after the Career Section would have helped market to other countries (who can skip the Financial Section unless they want to educate themselves on American Credit, Investments, Insurance, and Taxes). In the final pages of the book, the author mentions some lessons that they weren't able to fit in this volume, and the one that stands out the most in my head is: "Dealing With the Loss of Loved Ones." I think this topic could have easily merged with the mental, emotional, and relationship advice given in those corresponding chapters, and I wish the author, editor, and/or publisher would have considered splitting the financial and career pieces into another book, so that the subjects that were left out could have been included in this one, as they would marry so well with the Mental and Relationship Skills which appear in this volume, and so that people outside of the U.S. could have had a text that would have been wholly relevant to them. And to be honest, the writing and pacing of the book was good enough that I wouldn't have been mad if everything had been squeezed into the same book, making it a bit longer.
One of the best resources this book has to offer are the exercises and "homework assignments" given with each Skill Lesson. Not only does this book give great advise, but it encourages the reader to put those skills into practice, one lesson at a time. I will be very interested to see a second volume from Raffi Grinberg on "How to Be a Grown Up," because I'll definitely read it!
Thanks so much to #NetGalley, Raffi Grinberg, and Chronicle Books/Chronicle Prism for providing me with an advanced copy of this vital piece of literature in return for an honest review. I sincerely hope the book does well, and that many people benefit from its wisdom—(that kids coming out of High School and/or going into College will be more interested in picking it up than I would have been at their age/s) and that Raffi DOES put out another volume at some point!
February 8, 2025
My grandkids asked to read it. Nuff said
May 7, 2025
This book was surprisingly good. I’m an adult, so I didn’t really have a reason to read it since I’m not the target audience. Still, I’m always on the lookout for books I may want my son to read at some point. This is definitely one of them. Raffi does a great job covering topics that every young person should learn about. He discusses interpersonal topics like relationships and managing your mental health, and he also goes over saving, investing, taxes, career advice, and so much more.
If you’re a parent, you may want to check out this book and see if may be good for your child. If you’re someone around your early 20s or are just an adult who needs to grow up, this is definitely a book you need to read.
If you’re a parent, you may want to check out this book and see if may be good for your child. If you’re someone around your early 20s or are just an adult who needs to grow up, this is definitely a book you need to read.
December 15, 2024
As a high school teacher and a parent, I highly recommend this book! I wish I could buy a copy for each of my senior students. This guide is accessible, practical, and specific; it’s a great resource for new adults. Instead of skills that can be learned from Google or YouTube (e.g., changing a tire), Grinberg focuses on important big-picture skills such as finding long-term fulfillment. I am really impressed with how thorough and thoughtful this book is; in addition to explaining a topic like insurance, Grinberg urges us to consider why such topics really matter. I appreciate that Grinberg directs people to focus on long-term fulfillment rather than immediate happiness - and provides templates to identify one’s goals and the reasons behind them. Though Grinberg may be a little too optimistic about finding one’s dream job, he is right to acknowledge that some find more fulfillment outside of work, and that is okay too. This book is chock-full of wonderful advice, and would be a great gift for a high school or college grad, or any new adult. I definitely want to buy a copy for my kids and maybe one for my classroom too!
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the free eARC. I post this review with my honest opinions.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the free eARC. I post this review with my honest opinions.
October 23, 2025
Raffi Grinberg's How to Be a Grown Up is one of those books that seems almost too obvious. Why didn't this exist sooner? Part life manual, part pep talk, and part reality check, it's aimed squarely at young adults who are intelligent, ambitious, and utterly unprepared for the real world. And judging by the number of twenty-somethings stumbling through rent, rejection, and Roth IRAs, there's clearly a need for this kind of book.
The premise is simple yet powerful: what if someone actually taught you how to be an adult, truly guiding you through the process? Not in theory, but in practice. That's precisely what Grinberg sets out to do, and he pulls it off with a mix of clarity, humour, and lived experience. Drawing from the college course he taught, "Adulting 101," Grinberg tackles fourteen essential life skills, covering everything from finding your purpose to managing credit cards and navigating messy relationships with parents.
Although I didn't choose this book myself, I found it incredibly useful from a parent's perspective. My 19 and 21-year-old daughters are just stepping into adulthood, and this book gave me a new lens for seeing the challenges they'll face and a better idea of how I can support them without just giving generic advice. It reminded me that many life lessons, although obvious in hindsight, often aren't clear when you're feeling overwhelmed by life.
What sets this book apart is that it doesn't talk down to its audience. It doesn't recycle outdated advice or pretend that the modern world works the same way it did 30 years ago. Grinberg writes like someone who's been there, who's made mistakes, learned from them, and wants to save others the trouble. He doesn't pretend to have all the answers, but he does know which questions matter.
Yes, on the surface, it might feel like a "silly" or overly basic book to some, but that's kind of the point. Grinberg strips away the fluff and delivers what many adults wished they'd learned sooner. The result is a resource that's helpful, honest, and genuinely empowering.
Bottom line: How to Be a Grown Up is an excellent guide for anyone feeling overwhelmed by the transition into adult life or anyone supporting someone going through it. It's smart without being preachy, structured without being rigid, and packed with insights that can make a real difference. Whether you're 19 or parenting someone who is, it's worth a read.
The premise is simple yet powerful: what if someone actually taught you how to be an adult, truly guiding you through the process? Not in theory, but in practice. That's precisely what Grinberg sets out to do, and he pulls it off with a mix of clarity, humour, and lived experience. Drawing from the college course he taught, "Adulting 101," Grinberg tackles fourteen essential life skills, covering everything from finding your purpose to managing credit cards and navigating messy relationships with parents.
Although I didn't choose this book myself, I found it incredibly useful from a parent's perspective. My 19 and 21-year-old daughters are just stepping into adulthood, and this book gave me a new lens for seeing the challenges they'll face and a better idea of how I can support them without just giving generic advice. It reminded me that many life lessons, although obvious in hindsight, often aren't clear when you're feeling overwhelmed by life.
What sets this book apart is that it doesn't talk down to its audience. It doesn't recycle outdated advice or pretend that the modern world works the same way it did 30 years ago. Grinberg writes like someone who's been there, who's made mistakes, learned from them, and wants to save others the trouble. He doesn't pretend to have all the answers, but he does know which questions matter.
Yes, on the surface, it might feel like a "silly" or overly basic book to some, but that's kind of the point. Grinberg strips away the fluff and delivers what many adults wished they'd learned sooner. The result is a resource that's helpful, honest, and genuinely empowering.
Bottom line: How to Be a Grown Up is an excellent guide for anyone feeling overwhelmed by the transition into adult life or anyone supporting someone going through it. It's smart without being preachy, structured without being rigid, and packed with insights that can make a real difference. Whether you're 19 or parenting someone who is, it's worth a read.
November 9, 2025
Am I... too old for this advice?
Some parts of this book hit. I thought it started strong talking about exploring and articulating our deepest wants, and I also resonated with the end on intentionality. Some "eat your vegetables" type life admin was a good reminder, like networking and career thoughtfulness. I've definitely been living on autopilot a bit lately.
Other parts of the book really DIDN'T resonate with me. For example, I've always cared a lot about relationships and prioritizing it seriously (rather than carelessly entering frivolous flings). It really takes two to tango though, and clinically comparing the good vs. the bad isn't helpful for my romantic woes. I felt mounting pressure reading this chapter because I've never had issues with romantic commitment — first, I found sourcing to be the challenge (finding someone who met my standards). Now, I feel I could still use help figuring out how to be the best possible partner and knowing what is in my control (in terms of loving with intention and maintaining a lifetime of happiness together with someone).
I also felt too old for a lot of the more practical chapters. I suppose I've been adulting for a good decade or so now, and my parents were good about exposing me to financial systems from a young age (e.g., opening a bank account at 7 years old; getting me my first credit card in my teen years). I could probably write the chapters on taxes, credit cards, and so on. It felt out of place relative to the other content. I felt like this book was trying to do a bit too much.
Some parts of this book hit. I thought it started strong talking about exploring and articulating our deepest wants, and I also resonated with the end on intentionality. Some "eat your vegetables" type life admin was a good reminder, like networking and career thoughtfulness. I've definitely been living on autopilot a bit lately.
Other parts of the book really DIDN'T resonate with me. For example, I've always cared a lot about relationships and prioritizing it seriously (rather than carelessly entering frivolous flings). It really takes two to tango though, and clinically comparing the good vs. the bad isn't helpful for my romantic woes. I felt mounting pressure reading this chapter because I've never had issues with romantic commitment — first, I found sourcing to be the challenge (finding someone who met my standards). Now, I feel I could still use help figuring out how to be the best possible partner and knowing what is in my control (in terms of loving with intention and maintaining a lifetime of happiness together with someone).
I also felt too old for a lot of the more practical chapters. I suppose I've been adulting for a good decade or so now, and my parents were good about exposing me to financial systems from a young age (e.g., opening a bank account at 7 years old; getting me my first credit card in my teen years). I could probably write the chapters on taxes, credit cards, and so on. It felt out of place relative to the other content. I felt like this book was trying to do a bit too much.
May 5, 2025
The best self-help book for 20-somethings that has been written yet.
This book is the essential manual for everyone aged 18-30 on everything school should have taught you, but didn't. How to find the right career? Save enough for retirement? Pay your taxes? Manage debt? Buy insurance? Maintain healthy relationships? Find fulfillment in a long-term partnership or marriage? And ultimately - identify what is most important to you, and find your true north for navigating life's toughest challenges? It is everything that I wish I had been taught years ago, so I wouldn't have had to so painfully piece it together myself in adulthood.
The book is quick to read, fun, endlessly helpful, deeply practical, and laced with wisdom on every page. It's as delightful as it is useful.
If you know someone in their early 20s - maybe someone graduating school this year - don't hesitate and buy them this book. They will be thanking you for years and years.
This book is the essential manual for everyone aged 18-30 on everything school should have taught you, but didn't. How to find the right career? Save enough for retirement? Pay your taxes? Manage debt? Buy insurance? Maintain healthy relationships? Find fulfillment in a long-term partnership or marriage? And ultimately - identify what is most important to you, and find your true north for navigating life's toughest challenges? It is everything that I wish I had been taught years ago, so I wouldn't have had to so painfully piece it together myself in adulthood.
The book is quick to read, fun, endlessly helpful, deeply practical, and laced with wisdom on every page. It's as delightful as it is useful.
If you know someone in their early 20s - maybe someone graduating school this year - don't hesitate and buy them this book. They will be thanking you for years and years.
August 28, 2025
Being a huge supporter of lifelong learning, the moment I see the title I knew I had to read this book.
It was a good experience for me. The writing style is simple yet profound. With different concepts related to our mental skills explained in detail as well as in short form. It really opens up one’s thinking style.
Another aspect that worked really well for me was that at the end of each chapter there is this moment you must take to pause, answer questions and do homework that has such amazing points.
The skills that the author chose were also widespread and a must learning for younger kids these days or anyone who loves to keep learning.
I would like to thank netgalley for this eARC of How to Be a Grown Up The 14 Essential Skills You Didn’t Know You Needed (Until Just Now) by Raffi Grinberg by Chronicle Books.
It was a good experience for me. The writing style is simple yet profound. With different concepts related to our mental skills explained in detail as well as in short form. It really opens up one’s thinking style.
Another aspect that worked really well for me was that at the end of each chapter there is this moment you must take to pause, answer questions and do homework that has such amazing points.
The skills that the author chose were also widespread and a must learning for younger kids these days or anyone who loves to keep learning.
I would like to thank netgalley for this eARC of How to Be a Grown Up The 14 Essential Skills You Didn’t Know You Needed (Until Just Now) by Raffi Grinberg by Chronicle Books.
November 13, 2025
I felt like this book was more of a lecture or a collection of books summaries than an actual cohesive read. Each chapter felt disconnected from the next, which made the whole thing feel less like a real book and more like separate notes thrown together.
Some chapters especially the ones about investing and insurance were very technical and clearly more beneficial for U.S. readers. They didn’t add much value for international readers, especially since most of that information can be easily checked based on our own countries’ regulations anyway.
Overall, the book just didn’t flow, and it left me feeling underwhelmed.
Some chapters especially the ones about investing and insurance were very technical and clearly more beneficial for U.S. readers. They didn’t add much value for international readers, especially since most of that information can be easily checked based on our own countries’ regulations anyway.
Overall, the book just didn’t flow, and it left me feeling underwhelmed.
March 13, 2025
This book shaped decision-making in my early 20s that heavily influenced the trajectory of my life. I feel leaps and bounds ahead of my peers when it comes to so many important topics, including investing, retirement plans, navigating insurance, and communication in relationships.
So many great lessons packed into manageable chapters. Everyone expects you to know this stuff as an adult, but Raffi Grinberg is the first to put it all in one book. A must-read for anyone 20-25! I’m excited to gift this book to my brother when he graduates college this spring.
So many great lessons packed into manageable chapters. Everyone expects you to know this stuff as an adult, but Raffi Grinberg is the first to put it all in one book. A must-read for anyone 20-25! I’m excited to gift this book to my brother when he graduates college this spring.
March 28, 2025
Want to do your part in positively influencing the young adults in your life? Buy this book and gift it to them. The book can be utilized chapter by chapter or a burgeoning adult can jump in at any chapter than looks interesting to them. It is a roadmap to adulthood, a mentor in a book, a survival guide to the Twenties and beyond.
March 17, 2025
A MUST READ for anyone in their 20s. I believe in this book so much, I blurbed it. Raffi is straight forward but entertaining and gives us the essential information we need to set up a sound foundation for our lives. Honestly, I used it and I'm in my 30s! This book is excellent.
June 18, 2025
I read this to see if it might be useful for my college-aged children. They don’t listen to me, but hopefully I can find a way to get them to read this book. There is a lot of good info in this book.
October 8, 2025
Finally picked this one back up, and overall enjoyed it. It does a really good job of giving conversation pieces to consider, and a good overview in the financial section as well. Definitely does not have all the answers, but makes everything seem a bit less daunting.
January 17, 2025
Thank you for picking me as a giveaway winner. I really enjoyed the book and wish I had something like this when I was younger.
April 1, 2025
This book changed my life - all the knowledge was incredibly helpful and should have been taught in school
April 25, 2025
I liked the section on financial stuff. Everything else is good too.
May 5, 2025
If your school does not offer a life skills class then you should pick this book up for your child. It has very helpful information that everyone should have access to.
May 6, 2025
I think 22 year old me would have found this helpful but I like the thought exercises proposed by the author.
May 11, 2025
Helpful for anyone about to navigate life as an adult or currently navigating life.
May 14, 2025
I listened to this on audiobook before sending a copy to my graduating nephew. First time that anyone’s explained the stock market to me and I actually understood it.
June 5, 2025
Despite the title, this book is great. will be gifting to folks!
June 11, 2025
Great for post graduate students
August 25, 2025
Really like the premise but would have gotten more from it by reading it when I was 20
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews