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How Not to Be a Basic Peasant: A Medieval Bard's Guide to Living Your Best Life
Hark Peasants! Let this Bard guide you on the journey to becoming a better version of your peasant self.
Imagine if the Middle Ages had its own set of influencers and life coaches. Their collected wisdom would produce this very guide. Here, the ultimate Bard takes readers on a self-improvement journey—with lessons that any peasant can pick up and instantly start implementing into their lives. Examples How not to make a fool of thyself at the local tavern How to make a scene at a jousting tournament to stay relevant How to make your tiny home into a pleasant place to reside ( it involves sweeping out the rats) What not to wear (is chainmail in or out?) And what to do in case of a bear chase Including helpful and insightful illustrations inspired by medieval art, this handy guide will keep you become just slightly better than your peers, even if you may never achieve royalty status.
Imagine if the Middle Ages had its own set of influencers and life coaches. Their collected wisdom would produce this very guide. Here, the ultimate Bard takes readers on a self-improvement journey—with lessons that any peasant can pick up and instantly start implementing into their lives. Examples How not to make a fool of thyself at the local tavern How to make a scene at a jousting tournament to stay relevant How to make your tiny home into a pleasant place to reside ( it involves sweeping out the rats) What not to wear (is chainmail in or out?) And what to do in case of a bear chase Including helpful and insightful illustrations inspired by medieval art, this handy guide will keep you become just slightly better than your peers, even if you may never achieve royalty status.
- GenresHistoryNonfiction
128 pages, Hardcover
Published March 11, 2025
3 people are currently reading
110 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
June 13, 2025
Top tier satire. Couldn't differ where the genuine advice started and satire ended. Good piece for time travelers because good advise for peasant of all ages.
April 19, 2025
A medieval bard's advice mirroring modern-day lifestyle hypes and trends. Cleverly written, reminding me of Ian Mortimer's style. Funny illustrations and a creative writing style make this medieval self-help guide to self-success a nice little book. Are you fed up with living in a one-room house and doing backbreaking work from dusk till dawn? Fear not: be prepared to shovel excrement, never insult your liege, be mindful of your cow and just don't be a heretic. This book will show you how.
January 3, 2026
Picture this thine peasants! Do you want advice on how to live your horrid medieval life, while some of the imparted knowledge sounds suspiciously like a future that could happen in, let’s say, the 21st century? Then look no further!
This hilarious and vital guide will teach you how to walk around in style (did you know Toga’s are out, but chain mail is in?) how to not make social faux pas (please don’t ask people how they got the plague, we don’t judge their rambunctious alehouse nights). It will also quiz you for practical and elevated wisdom, like, “Tell Us Your Favorite Color and We’ll Tell You How You Die.” Spoiler, if it’s white, which represents virtue and an innocent nature… enjoy dysentery!
Huzzah all ye fellow peasants! We may not be royalty, but we sure can feel like it before we die horribly of one of many possible diseases through Kristen Mulrooney’s “How Not to be a Basic Peasant.” Now… where is my iced caudle— oh no, a bear!
This hilarious and vital guide will teach you how to walk around in style (did you know Toga’s are out, but chain mail is in?) how to not make social faux pas (please don’t ask people how they got the plague, we don’t judge their rambunctious alehouse nights). It will also quiz you for practical and elevated wisdom, like, “Tell Us Your Favorite Color and We’ll Tell You How You Die.” Spoiler, if it’s white, which represents virtue and an innocent nature… enjoy dysentery!
Huzzah all ye fellow peasants! We may not be royalty, but we sure can feel like it before we die horribly of one of many possible diseases through Kristen Mulrooney’s “How Not to be a Basic Peasant.” Now… where is my iced caudle— oh no, a bear!
March 24, 2025
I love this book ❤️
July 6, 2025
very entertaining. 11/10 parallels of literal medieval times to modern life
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews