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338 pages, Hardcover
First published April 22, 2025
The swell of grief was as instant as it was heavy. A sucker punch of reality, time, and gravity. Getting older would mean losing her again in the most insidious of ways. His memories of her would disappear with time, beginning with the little details he hadn't considered savoring in the moment. What she had for breakfast the day after their wedding, or what she wore on a random Wednesday ten years ago - all the fractured minutiae of a life in forgotten moments, cracked and chipped and flaking away like an old painting. She would become the suggestion of a person distinguished by his most intimate and dear memories, less a person and more of a concept, a slippage from present to past tense, here and gone. A face out of focus. Forgotten.
There were times he expected her to stop him, tell him this was all fucking crazy, but she didn't. That made him wonder what she'd seen or heard but hadn't mentioned because it seemed too weird. Giving voice to something so strange meant making it real, tangible, something that had to be dealt with in the confines of reality, even if the subject itself did not belong there.