I wish this book had existed three years ago when I hit the worst wall of my life. It’s a book about hitting the proverbial wall and the potential to spiral downward into despair. But it’s more about seeing the possibilities ahead as we cling to faith in those hard moments.
I’ve told my pastors thank you for talking about the hard things of life in their sermons. Every year since I’ve been a member, they preach on hitting the wall, as Paul Scazzero talks about in the must-read book Emotionally Healthy Spirituality. Because the EHS courses are part of the spiritual formation track for people at my church, both of my pastors talk about the wall frequently.
A wall is not an everyday inconvenience. It’s something very challenging that shakes your faith, such as a death, divorce, tragedy, or major situation change. When you hit a wall, your faith doesn’t work like it used to do. As my pastors have said, 85 percent of people either bounce off the wall, try to go around it, or stay stuck. But God invites us to go through it on a path of self-reflection, grief, and personal growth. If we go through that painful process, we can be stronger on the other side of the wall and better equipped to love God and serve others.
I hit that wall in 2022 when divorce shattered my world. I’ve spent over three years in the dark night of the soul, a concurrent theme often discussed in my church. My faith was shaken to the core, and it didn’t work the same way anymore. But I hung on through the spiritual disciplines, waiting to see some light in my path. Mostly, I saw the wall as an enormous obstacle that only God could remove when he deemed the time to be right.
Levi Lusko hit his wall in the form of a midlife crisis. He was forced to slow down, accept his limits, and reconnect with God in new ways. Since I’m only in the beginning of the book, I know I’ll learn more as I keep reading. But I know that he has faced huge trials, such as the death of his daughter, losses in his ministry, and the FBI confirming threats on his life.
This quote shook me up:
How do you feel when you slam into the upward plane of a new phase?
Upward plane? As I said before, I have only seen the wall as a big obstacle. I didn’t often think about climbing up the wall, though I even wrote a popular devotion about this in 2021, right before my world fell apart.
Back to today’s quote:
"It wasn't the wall that bloodied my nose: it was a stair."
If I see the wall as a stair, that changes my perspective. A stair is meant to be climbed. If I bump into it and bloody my nose, I need to heal. But I shouldn’t stay stuck on the stairstep. I need to start climbing again.
I love that God doesn’t require us to climb walls or stairs in our own strength, especially when we are bloodied. Instead, he encourages us from David’s psalm:
“In your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall” (2 Samuel 22:30).
This is the truth I’m pondering today, along with more quotes from Levi’s book:
- The gloomy mountain you now look at in fear and terror, once it is aflame with the glory of God, will transform before your eyes.
- There is significance in the spiral. It is not meaningless. The goal is to get closer to the center as you go around and around in smaller and smaller circles.
- You can view [transitions] as catalyzing forces preparing you for the coming attractions of joy and development.
- Round and round you are meant to go, tighter and tighter in smaller circles, toward what really matters. The worthless burning away, the Worthy remaining. And at the end of your journey, you will find not something, but Someone.
- In your life, as you face what seems to be a free-fall swan dive toward the bricks, believe that the death will lead to a resurrection.
I received a preview copy of this book from the publisher, and I highly recommend it to you. It is making my list of my favorite books from 2025.