A Wife After God's Own Heart: 12 Things That Really Matter in Your Marriage

by Elizabeth George

One secret to marital bliss is for a wife to love her husband the way God designed for her to love him—even with his shortcomings. God hasn’t called a woman to change her husband, but to focus on her calling as a wife. And the rewards for doing so are rich! Elizabeth provides valuable and practical insights on 12 key areas of a marriage, including...



This book can be used alongside "A Husband After God’s Own Heart, ";or as a stand–alone volume.

Genres: Christian, Marriage, Nonfiction, Faith, Christian Non Fiction, Womens, Christianity

219 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2004

About the author

Elizabeth George is bestselling author and national speaker dedicated to helping people live a life after God’s own heart. For over 30 years, the teachings and steadfast example of Elizabeth has helped countless men and women:

- Simplify life by focusing on God’s priorities.
- Appreciate God’s Word and apply it to everyday situations.
- Respond to circumstances with confidence by seeing yourself through God’s loving eyes.
- Increase closeness in marriage by serving and honoring each other.
- Powerfully shape the hearts of children and teenagers.
- Enjoy greater intimacy with God.

Women around the world are drawn to Elizabeth’s approach of daily starting with the Bible to handle life’s challenges. Her ability to weave biblical truth into everyday issues has led readers to make over 15 of her books bestsellers. Elizabeth’s distinctive work, A Woman After God’s Own Heart, has sold over 1 million copies and received the ECPA Platinum Book Award. Likewise, her delightful book, A Girl After God’s Own Heart, remains a treasured gift for moms and grandmothers and made the CBA Bestseller List for fourteen consecutive months.

Elizabeth also encourages women through her radio broadcast, “A Minute for Busy Women,” featured on Christian radio stations across America and at www.OnePlace.com. She is also a regular keynote speaker at women’s conferences and retreats.

In the midst of their busy writing schedule, Elizabeth and Jim love spending time with their two married daughters and eight grandchildren, taking daily walks along golden sands, and enjoying the beautiful Hawaiian sunsets. They divide time residing in Honolulu, Hawaii and the Washington State coast.

Reviews

[Olivia · Rating 3 out of 5]

This could be a helpful read to new Christians. It did have some good information, but felt very superficial. It seemed as if the motive for everything was what I will get out of it. There was so little of Christ, so little of making everything about love of Christ and obedience to Christ. I don’t want to be a good wife because of how it will benefit me. I want to be a good wife because it will bring glory to God.

[Olivia · Rating 3 out of 5]

some practical advice but a lot I didn't relate to (even though I'm married). I think there was a bit too much "this is the way I do things" and not enough encouragement to make the most of individuals circumstances. I also feel like my husband isn't demanding at all so if I followed this book precisely my life would be a lot more stressful 😜 the author was big on heeding to your husband though (which I think is healthier than maybe listening to all the wives out there)...it just made me wonder if maybe these books bring more stress than help (my overthinking consideration!)
still appreciated the reminder of putting husband/kids first...that helps this easily-burnt-out female to take a sigh of relief 😊 overall some good nuggets but I've liked her more scriptural focused books better.

[Jennifer Hall · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the set up of the book. Each chapter would start with scripture helps on the selected topic and then it would end with very practical ways to put those principles into play. A great read.

[Beverley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good read with practical suggestions for life. However it does set very high expectations and Elizabeth's home circumstances are very different from many people's and so to try to put into place everything she says is scriptural could leave you feeling somewhat of a failure. We have to remember to serve God in our own situation.

[Linda Sedillo · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just finished reading this book today. Its a wonderful book for every wife after God's own heart. My relationship with God continues to grow everyday and books like this one are amazing. Getting advice from a godly wife is the best thing you can do. I would recommended this book to every wife living in this world and trying to grow their relationship with God.

[Caitlin Burke · Rating 1 out of 5]

If I could give this no stars I would. God forbid a woman feel called to be a wife, mother, AND have a job outside the home. (Her advice if this is you, is to beg your husband to let you quit…) This is completely outdated and offensive. No value added.

[Leigh Anne · Rating 1 out of 5]

I hate to give a book a bad review, especially when it's a book with good intentions. Sometimes, though, with non-fiction, one troubling area can strike a book from your collection.

In this case, it's the author's position on depression. Although depression certainly can have a spiritual dimension, and prayer most likely couldn't hurt (especially if your reading audience is predisposed to it), depression is also an illness. As such, there should be AT LEAST a cursory disclaimer about getting medical attention. Sadly, there isn't. The author has another book in which she discusses her experiences with depression, but a reader shouldn't be expected to go find that other book to see if its subject is handled correctly. Advising readers to pray and have a good attitude, without considering the very real biological factors that make up depression, is not just misguided: it can be downright dangerous.

Everybody's entitled to their own beliefs, but not their own facts. If author popularity/demand means you have to have this book in your collection, you should supplement with David Murray's Christians Get Depressed Too or Chris Williams's I'm Not Supposed To Feel Like This/>. Reluctantly not recommended, under the "one bad apple" theory.

[Roksoliana Stasenko · Rating 5 out of 5]

Неймовірно естетичне українське видання під назвою "Дружина за серцем Божим" - отримала величезне задоволення, просто тримаючи книжку в руках, а ще більше, звісно, від прочитаного. Тепер більше знаю, якою дружиною варто бути (а якою ні 😁).

[Joanne Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

I could really feel the author's compassionate, loving, and gentle encouragement to devlop a tender heart toward one's husband and family, motivated by a desire to love and obey God.

[Mandy J. Hoffman · Rating 5 out of 5]

MY REVIEW:

In these more specific books, Jim and Elizabeth George dig deeper into what being a Biblical husband and wife really mean and looks like. I enjoy their honest yet considerate and respectful approach to the wide variety of issues in marriage as they pertain to each the role. They are gentle yet firm and stas true to the Word of God.

I personally liked how these books were basic yet broad at the same time. They were also deep yet easy to understand and apply as well. They push spiritual growth based on the truth - the Bible.

Both of these books are great to be used on an individual basis, in counseling/mentoring situations, as group studies, and as a couple. They would also make some great pre-marital or newlywed counseling material to work through.

BOOK OVERVIEWS:

A WIFE AFTER GOD'S OWN HEART

One secret to marital bliss is for a wife to love her husband the way God designed for her to love him—even with his shortcomings. God hasn’t called a woman to change her husband, but to focus on her calling as a wife. And the rewards for doing so are rich! Elizabeth provides valuable and practical insights on 12 key areas of a marriage, including...

* What it means to be a husband’s helper
* What submission is and isn’t
* Nurturing joy in your home and family
* Excelling in your work...and making time for fun as a couple!

This book can be used alongside A Husband After God’s Own Heart, or as a stand–alone volume.

A HUSBAND AFTER GOD'S OWN HEART

The closer a husband is to God, the closer he will grow to his wife. That’s why it’s so vital for husbands to pursue God’s heart and get to know His perfect design for the man’s role in the marriage relationship. Husbands will find their marriages growing richer and deeper as they discover how to...

* win a wife’s heart through loving leadership
* enjoy better communication through careful listening
* build a happier home through wise guidance
* encourage the family’s spiritual growth by example
* excel at a career without sacrificing family priorities

Jim George addresses 12 areas of a husband’s life, providing men with powerful and practical applications for becoming a husband after God’s own heart. Includes a helpful study guide.

[Carolyn Dawson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Elizabeth George asks, “What wife doesn’t yearn for a happy marriage that is satisfying and exciting?” Marriage is not to be entered into lightly; it is a serious commitment between a man and a woman with vows being made to each other for the present and the future. The Christian couple has the added responsibility of honouring God in their marriage - sometimes we loose sight of that. It doesn’t matter if you have been married for 1 year or 60 years, we all struggle from time to time. This book offers encouragement, motivation and wisdom from God’s word to help improve, refresh and strengthen the relationship you have with your husband.
There are 12 chapters in the book which cover a wide range of issues and situations that a wife may face. Each chapter is grounded in scripture and explains the application of biblical truths to our everyday lives. The first and most important chapter is entitled ‘Growing in the Lord’ which emphasizes our need for continual spiritual growth. The chapters that follow include, Working as a Team, Learning to Communicate, Enjoying Intimacy, Keeping up the Home, Raising Your Children, and Making Time for Fun. Each chapter ends with practical help and advice in the form of Little Things that make a Big Difference. One of those little things is simply to pray for your husband every day. Marriage takes work and it won’t always be easy but if we are true to God, honour his word and rely on his guidance we will be able to face whatever comes, through his strength.
Elizabeth George writes with the experience and knowledge of a wife (for over 40 years), mother and grandmother, reminding us that God’s guidelines are timeless. So whether you are just starting off on your journey together or can’t remember a time when you were apart, this book is definitely worth reading.

[Arielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

As always I greatly enjoy the writings of Elizabeth George! She has a simple and very relatable way of writing that convicts, and motivates. I love the layout of her books, the chapters are broken up just right and it is an easy book to read. I was given this book for Christmas as a newlywed and found a lot of good insight and advice for a new wife. Some of the chapters didn't pertain to my specific situation (or won't until later on in life, like having kids...) but that didn't bother me. Overall a very encouraging book that I'd recommend. The only reason why I dropped a star was that it is a little too similar to her other books (a young woman after gods own heart & a woman after gods own heart.)

[Chloe Abraham · Rating 3 out of 5]

My husband and I read through this book together. We both found it helpful and they made some great points.

One thing to remember when reading this book is that George's ideas are very traditional. Whilst I agree with most of the points in this book, I found it to be a little old fashioned at times and struggled to relate it to my own life and marriage. That being said, that is a personal opinion which I know wouldn't be held by all.

I did enjoy the book and took a lot away from it, but I think that it needs to be modernized a little bit to make it appealing to younger wives who are living in the 21st century.

[Galileia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This will help u set ur priorities in ur married life. it's like a cookbook that provides a perfect recipe & prepares all the needed ingredients of what may not be a perfect family yet peaceful, full of love and understanding.When love is present inside ur home..it will extend to people around u before u even know it. To leave bad habits behind and for the betterment of yourself..everything must commence in your home. One can never be good outside if u have neglected ur own family.

[Marsha · Rating 4 out of 5]

While this book did reiterate some of what was presented in A Woman after God's Own Heart, it expounded on it as well. I found that Elizabeth George's straight forward approach was refreshing. She helped clarify exactly what a Godly Wife's heart should look like and how was should work to not only achieve that mindset, but to maintain` it as well.

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall, good book. It went into a little more detail about what it means to be a Godly wife. What my responsibilities should be and how I should support my husband. I did find a couple of her principles a little old fashioned or unrealistic in today's society, but in general I was very challenged by her words.

[Holly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just like her book "A Woman After God's Own Heart", Elizabeth George takes you through the key Biblical characteristics of a Godly wife and woman. I really enjoyed this read. My favorite part was the "Little Things That Make a Big Difference" at the end of every chapter. Here, she places helpful tips and ideas to help live out the trait mentioned in the chapter.

[Christine]

What an amazing book! It so focused on God and His will for marriage. And how we must first change and have a relationship with God no matter where our spouse is at in their walk. We as women must do it God's way no matter what else is going on.

[Stephanie Thode]

One of the very few books I could not finish! I sensed this might happen when she told me I needed to lose weight and wear make-up to keep my husband happy, but once she started talking about if I didn't stay home to constantly cook and clean she lost me.

[Christina Jaudon · Rating 4 out of 5]

We read this jointly only a husband after God's own heart. Chapters were the same subjects and we got to follow up with each other and share the things we learned.

[Princesshonor · Rating 3 out of 5]

I've been reading this book for like 4 years.
So I'm going to try to finish it now. Very good topics.

[Erica Steinnagel · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book before I was married, but I found it extremely useful! I need to read it again, now that I AM married! All married Christian women should read this book.

[IrenesBookReviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

All books by Elizabeth George are excellent. Buy the book and you will learn and grow. She is not preachy but you learn something in every chapter.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

LOVED this one too! Sometimes it feel really hard to put into practice though, but I still loved this one!

[Kelly (smeets_books) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This really helped me as a new wife to know what was expected of me! Full of practical tips and helpful insights especially how to talk to your husband! Can dip into time and again.

[Kyla Clarkston · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am very thankful that this book was recommended to me. It definitely taught me a lot!

[Christine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I gain so much from her books. They are practical and full of Biblical wisdom.

[Katelyn Harden · Rating 3 out of 5]

Went back and forth a lot on this, but I'll settle for giving this book a 3.5/5 stars!

Elizabeth George's "A Wife After God's Own Heart" was lovely. Early into the book, the author shares with the audience that, upon becoming a Christian, one of her first endeavors was the read from Genesis to Revelation (the whole Bible!) seeking out what it means to be a godly wife. The findings of her endeavor were compiled into this very book.

While I would certainly recommend going straight to scripture to discover these God-given mandates for women yourself, this book is a helpful start to your journey to finding it out. Each chapter focuses on 1 of 12 attributes that, according to scripture/Elizabeth George, are to be priorities for a godly wife. They include tenants like: Growing in the Lord, Learning to Communicate, Managing Your Money, Keeping Up the Home, Raising Your Children, Tending Your Career, etc.

Where it could have been better: The struggle I had with the book at various points (and the reason it ultimately did not meet the 4-star threshold despite my ultimate enjoyment of it!) was the fact that much of the book felt shallower than what I am used to. With so many topics to cover, I felt like we were just scratching the surface of most of the topics discussed. I presume this was her goal as she mentions wanting to speak much more about each topic, but this was still a point of disappointment for me. I also feel like she failed to account for various personal backgrounds but mostly assumed her own experiences to be the norm for most people. While she certainly does not owe it to us to account for every perspective by any means, this reality did make the book feel a tad less relatable at times. Finally, some verses weren't quite used properly. An example was how she used 2 Kings 20:1 (God's words to King Hezekiah through His prophet Isaiah) as an example for the importance of keeping her house in order--an interpretation I believed was missing the mark.

What I enjoyed: Overall, the book still grew on me with each passing chapter. When I realized the content didn't seem to go as deep as I'd prefer, I decided to do something I normally don't do... complete the study questions in the back of the book (lol!). I found that completing the discussion questions--which usually would take me to scripture for Biblical contemplation--proved to be very helpful for me. It allowed me to look at a topic I generally wrestled with, write out deeper thoughts about it through guided questions, and face scripture to deepen true conviction (ultimately, the Word of God is our authority--not the word of any author!). I also really enjoyed how all chapters included practical action steps to implement these changes. While the heart change is necessary above all, action steps to nudge our heart in the right direction are SO helpful!

This was my first of her books, and I was surprised to discover I already have 2 other books of hers on my shelf! So I look forward to getting into those. :)

A final note, let's all keep sweet Elizabeth George in our prayers. Recently, her husband, Jim George, passed away. She clearly had a deep love for her husband, and I can't imagine the pain she is going through now. May we all pray!

[Jacqueline · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am very generously giving this book three stars because I believe the author has her heart in the right place, and there are some good nuggets of information and advice, but I actually had a lot of issues with this book. I've listed just a few below.

The biggest issue is her chapter on working and arguing that wives should basically never work outside the home for pay. But doesn't the author work? Even if she works from home writing, being an author is a lot of work that also requires commitments that take place outside the home. Why is she allowed to work but the readers are not? She also mentions Priscilla in another chapter, a woman in the Bible who was a wife and also worked as a tentmaker and was living a God-honoring life doing so. I do not read anywhere in the Bible that God doesn't want women to work outside the home ever, and Priscilla is just one example of that. There absolutely can be a happy, God-honoring balance of being a wife, mother, and employee somewhere.

There's also a big message that women are to spend all their time and energy serving others selflessly as Jesus did (fair enough), but then gives an example where her parents didn't drop everything for her to visit them and she's upset. So obviously the author does expect other people to serve her needs sometimes. Because relationships are a two-way street. Including and especially a marriage!! But she makes a big deal that the marriage is all about the wife serving the husband and don't you dare burden him with your petty grievances. This is the opposite of what I believe God wants for our marriages.

I would not recommend this book to anyone, but especially not if ever plan on working outside the home ever in your life.

[Maui Rochell · Rating 5 out of 5]

I finally finished this book as well! I remembered being so eager to find a copy of this book online and purchased the last copy via Facebook Marketplace in a Christian bookstore far away from where I live! Such dedication we got right there.

It was an assigned reading to us when we were a part of the couple's group, sadly we had to leave because we weren't getting married anytime last year. But I had fun studying this book with the other married women, so my reading took a back seat not until last December when I decided to gave it a try as I'm also preparing for another season of my life -- marriage.

I learned and highlighted so much from this book and I know that this will only be the first out of many times that I will re-read it and consult for wisdom when I finally become a wife. Thank You Lord for this book.