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Is This Really Love?: Recognizing When You’re in a Coercive, Controlling, and Emotionally Abusive Relationship―and How to Break Free
It’s time to take back control. If you’re in a coercive or emotionally abusive relationship, this trauma-informed guide can help you gain clarity—and courage to break free.
Do you suspect you’re in a coercive, controlling, or emotionally abusive relationship? Does your partner have unreasonable expectations of you, or cause you to feel anxious or stressed? Do they make you feel guilty for spending time with other people? Are they manipulative, blaming, gaslighting, and shaming when they don’t get what they want? Do you want to leave, but feel like you just can’t? When we think of emotional abuse, we usually think of verbal aggression and yelling; but often it can also be subtle, nuanced, and difficult to recognize.
Written by a psychotherapist and relationship expert, this trauma-informed guide spotlights the red flags of coercive control, and provides powerful tools to help you break free from a toxic love relationship and gain the autonomy needed to live your life fully—without fear, guilt, or intimidation. Drawing on acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), EMDR, motivational interviewing, and self-compassion skills, this book will help you identify your core values, rebuild your confidence and self-worth, and learn to set essential boundaries.
Coercive control and emotional abuse create an unequal power dynamic—giving your partner power and creating anxiety, confusion, self-doubt, fear, and a sense of entrapment for you. But you can change course and take back your life. This book will show you how, step by step.
Do you suspect you’re in a coercive, controlling, or emotionally abusive relationship? Does your partner have unreasonable expectations of you, or cause you to feel anxious or stressed? Do they make you feel guilty for spending time with other people? Are they manipulative, blaming, gaslighting, and shaming when they don’t get what they want? Do you want to leave, but feel like you just can’t? When we think of emotional abuse, we usually think of verbal aggression and yelling; but often it can also be subtle, nuanced, and difficult to recognize.
Written by a psychotherapist and relationship expert, this trauma-informed guide spotlights the red flags of coercive control, and provides powerful tools to help you break free from a toxic love relationship and gain the autonomy needed to live your life fully—without fear, guilt, or intimidation. Drawing on acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), EMDR, motivational interviewing, and self-compassion skills, this book will help you identify your core values, rebuild your confidence and self-worth, and learn to set essential boundaries.
Coercive control and emotional abuse create an unequal power dynamic—giving your partner power and creating anxiety, confusion, self-doubt, fear, and a sense of entrapment for you. But you can change course and take back your life. This book will show you how, step by step.
- GenresSelf Help
152 pages, Paperback
Published July 1, 2025
23 people are currently reading
1659 people want to read
About the author
Leah Aguirre
4 books5 followersLeah Aguirre is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW).
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
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June 29, 2025This book may be short but it is important. Leah highlights this in the book, but emotionally abusive relationships can be more difficult to recognize. Aspects of them can even be normalized by society, think “boys will be boys” and the idea of “passion” in extreme emotional responses.
Leah leads you through recognizing what emotional abuse is, understanding the effects, and providing tools to leave the relationship. All while not blaming or criticizing those who are in these relationships. She pulls on self-compassion skills, as well as other therapeutic modalities.
Overall, this is an incredibly helpful read for those who in an emotionally abusive and unhealthy relationship. This is one that I can see being a great addition to therapy and to read with your therapist.
Leah leads you through recognizing what emotional abuse is, understanding the effects, and providing tools to leave the relationship. All while not blaming or criticizing those who are in these relationships. She pulls on self-compassion skills, as well as other therapeutic modalities.
Overall, this is an incredibly helpful read for those who in an emotionally abusive and unhealthy relationship. This is one that I can see being a great addition to therapy and to read with your therapist.
August 18, 2025
I wish I had this book in my 20's. Recognizing covert and controlling behaviors in a relationship, that is in fact abuse can be very difficult when you are in the thick of it. This book helps shine a light in a way that doesn't make you feel bad reflecting on your experiences and past. This book is for anyone who has that nagging feeling that something just isn't quite right, but you think "it's not that bad". 10/10 recommend and cannot wait for more from this author.
November 7, 2025
To answer the title, no lmfao.
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews