Swell

by Julie Rieman Duck

When Christian Rusch plucks Beck Ionesco from the freshman ranks for himself, she’s tempted with parties, popularity, and love. But as the free-flowing booze that soaks his world seeps into her own, Beck begins using liquid courage as a way to ignore Christian’s dark moods… and cover her anxiety about his flirtatious friend Hillman.


However, when Christian breaks up with Beck, and Hillman makes a dangerous move, no amount of alcohol can stop the pain or keep her out of trouble. And just when it seems like she’s lost everything, Beck is partnered with Jesse Leary for an art project. After spending time with him, Beck realizes it’s more than a study date… and Christian’s not happy about it. Then again, Beck’s not sure she’s happy with him, either.


But only after plowing through a bottle of wine, a wild fight, and one guardrail that becomes Christian’s last call, does Beck admit to her problem and ask for help from the one whose life secretly parallels her own.

Genres: Contemporary, Young Adult, Romance

ebook

First published August 25, 2012

About the author

Born in Los Angeles and raised in San Clemente, California, Julie Rieman Duck wrote her way through school on an old-fashioned typewriter. Somewhere along the line, she was sidetracked by careers in magazine publishing and copywriting. While Julie honed her skills at writing print ads and articles, the stories that moved her heart and soul were bubbling underneath, waiting to escape.

It took a medical scare and the loss of her job — on the same day and within 30 minutes of each other — to finally allow her stories to free themselves and be put to paper.

Julie currently works as a medical copywriter by day and fiction writer by night.

Reviews

[Giselle · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoy contemporaries for many reasons, one of them being the emotional output that you get from them, another is the rawness of their subjects. Swell, both emotional and raw, is a truly great read about teen alcoholism. The topic itself is gritty and unforgiving, and the characters that we meet make us not only sympathize, but understand how something like this happens. And it happens, unfortunately, much more than we might realize.

Don't think this to be a slow spiral into alcoholism, though. The book begins with Beck being introduced to this new liquid courage, and the story takes place during the heart of her addiction. While some may find it a quick downfall into alcoholism, having seen it happen to friends in high school, I know just how quick this habit can become more than. At first it begins with wanting to fit in, or conform to your peers' ways of life, then you start having a drink even when you're alone, which, soon enough, leads to panic and desperation when you run out. The novel also spans quite a few days and weeks in mere chapters which makes it seem like no time has passed, when, in reality, finally finding something that makes you socially accepted, made me understand why the addiction came on strong. Who would want to go back to the way it was?

The blame for this addiction lies mostly on Christian. Christian is good looking and popular, he's interested in Beck--a freshman--, but he's also interested in his drink. Being influenced by a cute guy is no uncommon phenomenon. What's funny in this case is that, even though I recognized his bad influence from the start, and I should have wanted him to piss off, I still liked him. I kind of see it as a case where the author gets her reader influenced along with her protagonist. I got Beck; I knew why she loved the idea of Chris, and the social privileges being with him brought about. But drinking aside, I never saw Christian as an enigma. He was a jerk at times, sure, but I always felt he had his reasons--his own darkness that influenced him as well.

When it comes between Christian and Jesse, however, there is no contest. A genuinely good and pure hearted soul, Jesse is a breath of fresh air in this novel. A respite from the otherwise agitated tone of the book. Although it is, technically, a love triangle, I wouldn't even classify it as a "triangle". In this case, I understood her attraction to both guys. I even saw it more as a confused teenager than any type of triangle. We all experienced teenage hormones, and most know what it is like to be attracted to more than one person. This is not a improbable concept, especially from an emotionally perturbed teenage girl who's going through way more than anyone should.

Swell is not sugar coated, it's not pretty or fluffy, it's a surprisingly profound read dealing with strong emotional events. Because of which I would recommend this for more mature readers. Sex, drugs, and, of course, alcohol, all make grand appearances. If this is the type of raw contemporary you enjoy, I would hand it to you enthusiastically!

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A copy was provided for review.

For more of my reviews, visit my blog at Xpresso Reads

[Jasprit · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars.

Swell turned out to a much darker gritty contemporary than I expected. Just looking at the gorgeous cover, the use of bright colours, gorgeous title and of course Jake Gyllenhaal lookalike model. I would immediately be lured in picking a copy if I saw this in a bookstore.

I think what it was the blurb gives you a small snippet about what this book is really about. The first time I read it over I think I focused in on the romance aspect immediately and overlooked the other prominent aspect. Rebecca isn’t part of the popular crowd at school, but that all changes at the school dance when school hotshot Christian spends most of the night dancing with her. Rebecca’s done everything in the past to get his attention, so it’s a little surprising when he decides to spend time with her, a relative nobody. Christian is slightly wasted during the whole dance, so Rebecca’s unsure whether it was the drink making the decisions for him or Christian really wanted to spend time with her. Rebecca decides the next day she’s going to make the first move, she doesn’t want to be fobbed off any longer. What results is a lovely relationship, Rebecca’s never felt this loved in her life, she’s got a guy who truly cares about her and he’s one of the most popular guys in school bringing her social status up in the process. Despite getting a few warnings earlier on from Christian’s friends and her best friend Jemma to take a step back from their relationship, they seem to have progressed to where they are really quickly Rebecca decides to ignore them and the ringing alarm bells going off in her head. Before she knows it, her relationship which started off as her being treated like a queen starts quickly spiralling totally out of control.

Like I mentioned earlier I didn’t realise that drinking would feature as a prominent part of Swell. Rebecca started off a lot more concerned with her relationship with Christian, but soon drinking over took everything. I naturally assumed that Rebecca was an older school student as she was hanging out with Christian a senior, so I was completely shocked when I realised she was only 15 years old. She eventually started letting the drink take over her life; she didn’t realise that all the drinking she did with Christian was making her relationship and life more toxic rather than as a means of being able to escape her problems. Also the extent she went to get her hands on little dribs and drabs was horrifying. But I highly praise Duck as she was not afraid to show the realistic consequences that many teens have to face when they become addicted to drinking.

Swell was a real eye opener of a read, it ventures down a dark path and really emphasises the issues of drinking today. I definitely recommend picking Swell up if you’re in the mood for a dark gritty read.

This review can be found on: The Readers Den

[Keertana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enter for a chance to win Swell HERE.

For anyone who knows me, they’ll tell you that contemporary really isn’t my preferred genre. In fact, I can count on one hand the number of contemporary novels I can claim to have truly loved and while I can’t add Swell to that pile with rivals like Melina Marchetta, Cath Crowly, and Kristen Hubbard sitting up there, it definitely is added to my list of contemporary novels I truly enjoyed.

Swell is told in a unique manner, each chapter starting out with a few brief paragraphs of our protagonist, Beck, drunk and about to have something very, very bad happen to her. After this short glimpse of the present, we are jilted back into the past as Beck recounts her story of how she met her boyfriend, Christian, and came to become an alcoholic. While Beck’s narration of the past was slow-moving and could drag at some points, it set up a strong foundation, both of Beck’s character, the nuances of her relationship with Christian, and the slow dependency that she grew to have on alcohol. Furthermore, Duck’s writing is addictive – even if you want to put it down, the brief glimpses of the future/present make you keep flipping the pages, anxiously wondering what will happen to Beck.

Thus, I have to give Duck props for her impeccable characterization. Beck is, at first, a girl I would have instantly wanted to become friends with. With her love of art and sweet disposition, she isn’t easy to dislike, but as the novel progresses, her actions become increasingly silly and her alcoholism is horrifying. Yet, what makes Swell so remarkable is the fact that Duck makes you feel so invested in the story, in Beck’s life, that you want her to become alright and even though you don’t condone her actions, you understand them so, so well and even have to wonder, at times, if you would fall into the same traps if you were in her position.

Swell is a dark, gritty, and issue novel, which made it hard to get through because of its subject-matter in many parts, but it’s oh-so-real as well. It never felt dramaticized, cliché, or exceedingly typical and was, truly, an intensely original novel. In addition to Beck, we become close to her boyfriend, the enigmatic and “perfect” Christian. While I never fully warmed up to Christian, there were times when I could forget what a bad influence he was on Beck and simply be happy for their relationship – which is, again, a sign of Duck’s superb writing prowess. Jesse, however, was the character who truly stole my heart. Although Jesse only appeared after nearly half the novel, we get to know him as well – even better in some parts – than Christian.

What do I say about Jesse? *swoons* Well, he is kind, sweet, and an artist just like Beck, but most of all, their relationship blossoms so sweetly through conversation unlike the attraction/lust between Christian and Becca that I fell for it – hard. I will admit that I wasn’t a huge fan of the fact that these two started liking each other while Becca was still dating Christian, but their romance still drew me in.

Nevertheless, despite all these wonderful points, Swell never truly won me over until the end. It was perfect. It also had a huge plot twist which I loved and I was left feeling immensely satisfied. However, Swell definitely was a really tough novel for me to get through and I had to put it on hold for a couple days after a point because of how dark it was. Yet, it’s one of those novels that simply demands to be read, both because of its subject-matter and writing. Its characters will stick with you for pages to come but most importantly, the message Duck leaves behind is one of lasting significance. Truly, I can’t envision any other author tackling this on in a better – or more realistically moving – way.

You can read this review and more on my blog, Ivy Book Bindings.

[Crystal · Rating 3 out of 5]

I cannot express how mad I am after reading this book. When I read I usually go through so many emotions but with Swell I had one emotion and that was furry! Julie Rieman Duck has written a book that I will not easily forget and I just hope that parents who read this will understand what not to do.

Swell is so much more than just a story. It felt like a real life recount of what can happen if a fifteen year old is left with no help and absent parents. Beck is not the popular girl and she is definitely not someone who would normally date the most popular guy in school, but after a toga dance at her school Christian the "it" guy singles her out and thus begins her spiral downward. See Christian has drinking problems and it is not enough that Back has to endure his behavior, no she has to drink with him. By with him, I mean she has to keep up with him drink for drink. Beck believes that she has to drink to keep Christian happy and that they have a bond since they both drink now. What becomes clear early on is Beck has a serious problem. She is quite simply put an alcoholic in denial. She begs people to buy for her, she steals from her parents liquor cabinet, and when she has to money she trades "favors" for alcohol. Yes that is exactly what I mean. To pair with this growing problem, Christian breaks up with her because of his "best friend" who wants Beck. What happens next is just creepy and disturbing on so many levels. The story takes a horrible turn and Beck finally sees the light and decides enough is enough. This is after so many abusive situations that I have to wonder why she didn't see the light earlier.

I am beyond baffled at how her parents didn't see what was going on. They were there in the same house with her the entire time and didn't blink an eye. Even after she is caught drinking hr parents ground her and then her mom notices she is sneaking out at night and does nothing to stop it! They love Christian and think nothing could ever happen to their little girl with him. This is where I think they should have taken a more active role in their daughters life. They should have gotten to know Christian way more than they did and I mean Beck was fifteen! Why weren't they more involved?? I am not happy that Beck went through so much at such an early age. Even her friends did nothing to stop her. Her best friend just stopped hanging out with her and Jessie her art partner just told her he didn't like drinking and left it at that. Nobody helped her! I could see Beck screaming for help and it really ticks me off that she was alone.

This book was very difficult to get through. It was sad, heartbreaking, irritating, and just all out maddening. I really hope that if this was a true story Beck got the help she deserved and is now recovered.

[Heidi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rebecca lies helpless, unable to move and stop the boy hovering over her from groping her breasts. Her head is buzzing, and her limbs are limp. How did she get here? She just had a few drinks. The desperate boy begins to paw at her skirt and she can't muster the strength to push him away.....She lies paralyzed her mind racing with fear. It all started a few months ago when she attended the last dance of the year: a toga dance. At fifteen, Rebecca is shy and uncomfortable in her own skin. Her breasts are too small, her butt too big and no guy is going to pay attention to her...that is until the hottest guy in school, Christian, a junior, asks her to dance. So what if he smells like he has been drinking? Soon she is dating Christian and drinking heavily. Her life spirals out of control leading up to this moment of drunken helplessness.....
What I Liked:
*I liked that Swell takes on some weighty and troubling issues and not once does it sugar coat or shrink away from the harsh realities of teenage drinking. Ms. Duck brings us a fifteen year old girl lured into dangerous and out of control behavior due to heavy drinking. This book is a stark reminder that even the best and brightest kids can get caught up in the highs of alcohol.
*This book is a tough read at times but it certainly is an eye opener. If you are a parent you should consider reading this book because it will make you aware of the serious dangers of underage drinking and show you how a teenager can quickly get snagged into the vicious cycle of binge drinking and the lengths they will go to score their next drink, even if it means resorting to cold medicine and vanilla extract. Alcohol abuse is frightening and everyone should be aware of the dangers. If you have a teenager this is a book that you should read and discuss. Keep in mind that it deals with some very mature topics such as alcohol abuse, date rape and sex. Yes, it is for mature readers but don't keep this away from your teenager due to content, read it and talk about it together.
*I appreciated that both the main characters, Rebecca and Christian, come from good stable homes and both are excellent students and talented. It is easy to assume that alcoholism affects kids coming from unstable backgrounds, but this book makes it very clear that alcoholism can strike anyone, regardless of race, social status, etc.
In the end, I came away from the book with a new understanding of alcoholism.
*I liked that the book ended on a positive note, although it is a long, devastating and cruel journey to get there.
And The Not So Much:
*The first half of the book utilizes flashbacks that show the choices Rebecca made that lead up to her current compromising situation: drunk and under the influence of a date rape drug about to be violated. The problem with this method is that it severely interrupts the flow of the story. You are reading about Rebecca and how she turned into an alcoholic and then you get this jarring flash forward to the date rape scene. This goes on until the midway point and then that terrifying situation is resolved. The second half is straight forward and smooth. I personally thought the interjection of the date rape scenes were jarring.
*After the resolution of the date rape, nothing changes with Rebecca's behavior. you would think that the dramatic buildup to this horrifying event would alter her behavior and certainly alert her parents, but things continue down the same path. I think it would have made more of an impact to make this event the straw that breaks the camel's back. I was certainly expecting it to be the pivotal point that changes everything the way it is built up. When nothing happens, the date rape scene loses its steam. Furthermore, I found it hard to believe that Rebecca's parents, who are loving and attentive would continue to turn a blind eye. Yes, they are aware their daughter has a problem but they do little to intervene. The mother even knows that Rebecca is sneaking out at night and confronts her, but she doesn't stop her. I guess I just thought this was a little unbelievable.
*I appreciated the way the author incorporated Alcoholics Anonymous and The Big Book: AlcoholicsAnonymous as resources for help. I was disappointed, though that she did not provide a list of resources for Alcoholics at the end of the book. I think this would be very helpful for anyone caught in this terrible situation.

Swell is a frightening and realistic look at how alcohol can take over and ultimately destroy lives. This is a book that parents and teens should both read to gain a better understanding of this detrimental disease. Keep in mind that this takes on heavy issues that should be discussed. As a parent, I am glad I read this book, the better informed I am, the better!

Favorite Quotations:
"My silhouette, which could be called hour glass, was constantly challenged by rippling jiggle and junk in the trunk I swear didn't belong there."
"A true friend tells you there's a booger hanging out of your nostril and then hands you a tissue."
"I sank into Jesse's body and felt like a key that had found the right lock."

I received a copy of this book as part of a book tour. I was not compensated for this review and all opinions are my own.
Posted @Rainy Day Ramblings.

[Jenni Arndt · Rating 4 out of 5]

After reading, and thoroughly enjoying Julie's The Joy and Torture of Joshua James, I was quick to jump on the opportunity to take part in the tour for her latest full length novel, Swell. Once again I was drawn in by her incredibly raw storytelling, and unflinching honesty in the most dire of situations. Swell is the story of Rebecca who longs to be with the most popular boy in school, Christian Rusch. She's taken by surprise when at her high school's year end toga dance Christian chooses to dance with her all night. As their relationship grows she goes on a rather quick downward spiral into alcohol dependency.

One thing I wished I as a reader would have gotten out of Swell was a little more time to get to know Rebecca as she was prior to Christian and drinking. We are introduced to her as a very intelligent girl who thrives in the arts and has a strong support system in her closest friend Jenna and her parents. But all too quickly she is with Christian and pimping for booze outside the local liquor store. That's a minor complaint of mine because I do feel that we get to know Beck very well once she starts to take the decline. I did end up connecting with her and I really wanted to reach into the novel and shake her through much of it. So I guess what I am saying is that I wish I got a better grasp on how this addiction and dependency was a big stray from who she was before it all happened. Once she starts drinking she became someone that I was angry with often and also felt a strong sense of pity for. She got herself into some terrible situations and she kept pining for Christian, who was a complete ass, if I may say so myself. I didn't like him at all, and the relationship between the two of them made me uncomfortable in most scenes. But I think that was the point of it, there was just so much wrong with them but neither could see it because they were always wearing their wine goggles.

The part of this story that I loved the most was that Beck took the shape of girls that I actually knew in high school. I can remember so vividly girls who were trying too hard to fit in, going to ridiculous lengths to do so and changing themselves (most often for the worse.) I was pretty shocked to see how far she would go, in the end, to get a fix and that just furthered the sadness I had in my heart for her. Once Jesse comes into the picture and she starts seeing how much she has changed, and how much she misses her art the story got really touching. I loved Jesse! He was such a sweet guy and he wasn't the perfect jock, or the hottest guy in school but he wanted Beck for who she was and that's always the best. I also really enjoyed how the truth of his life was kept as a bit of a mystery that unfolded slowly and the reveal was so touching that I was reaching for the box of tissues on my nightstand.

This story is by no means happy, but it's real. It's filled with the crap that went on in my high school and I am sure many others as well. To me, that's the best kind of story and I really think Duck was the perfect author to write a raw tale like this. Swell makes you uncomfortable, it makes you angry and it makes you hopeful that a person who has lost their way can once again find who they were and come out smiling on the other side.
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You can read all of my reviews at Alluring Reads.

[Sam · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5/5

Visit SIK Book Reviews for a chance to win a copy of this book, plus seven others!!

This novel is very much an emotional rollercoaster that takes the reader through Beck's struggle with fitting in, facing her alcohol addiction, and struggling through relationship ups-and-downs. The story was very heart-wrenching and just made me want to reach out to this girl and help her to see the mistakes she was making! It is a very strong coming-of-age story about a girl who makes a bunch of wrong choices -- particularly with alcohol and things she will do to get her hands on it once she becomes hooked -- and eventually needs to hit rock-bottom in order to admit and deal with her problems.

I have mixed feelings about the characters. Jesse was by far my favourite character in the book. He is funny, witty, and so sweet and understanding with Beck. I thought that he was represented very nicely and was very well developed. Beck really made me angry sometimes. I did not agree with her decisions and I just wanted to scream at her for being so foolish! Though Beck's character irked me terribly, it did not stop me from sympathizing and connecting with her. Her story is absolutely heart-wrenching and definitely sent my emotions on a rollercoaster. I hated Christian. I thought he was just a selfish, girl-using boy who Beck should not have been spending her time with. Choose Jesse, Beck!!

Duck's writing is good. There was just one place that I thought would have been better had she written it differently. At the beginning of the novel, the way Beck and Christian meet, start dating, and fall in love so quickly and with very little description irritated me. It seemed way too abrupt and, therefore, caused me to not be into their relationship throughout the novel. They also seemed very disconnected, even during the parts where they were being lovey-dovey. I guess it just wasn't all that convincing to me that either of them were actually in love with the other. One little aspect that I loved, though, was how the word "swell" was used at the very beginning and the very end of the book with very different meanings. I also thought that the styles of the chapters were great. Each chapter -- for about the first half of the novel -- starts with a little snippet of something bad happening to Beck in the future before we continue on reading about the present. Thus, the reader is left wondering what will happen to her and has to wait for the next chapter to learn a little bit more about that situation.

[Candace · Rating 5 out of 5]

Swell is an emotional rollercoaster as we ride with Rebecca on her downworld spiral to alcoholism. We watch as she alienates those who cares about her just to get into the 'in crowd' and Christians arms. We watch as she uses liquid courage to become someone she's not. And we watch as everything starts to fall apart.

In the first half or so of the book the beginning of each chapter has a little bit of foreshadowing of what's going to happen, that's going to be one turning point in her life. Something absolutely horrific. As we read it's pretty clear where things are going, but it's just a teaser because we don't know how far it will go and who may come in to save the day, if anyone. Unfortunately even when horrible things happen it's not enough to break the cycle of drinking. And Rebecca still does incredibly awful things to get her hands on alcohol, any kind she can find.

Once school starts she meets Jesse, who is her art partner. Jesse has this light and funny personality and she finds him to be a person who can help take her mind off of everything else. And in the end it's Jesse who helps her find the pieces of her life that she lost.

A lot of horrible things happen in this book and some of you may think that it's not real, teens don't go THAT far. But they do. And this book is a real look at it. Yes, there's drinking and there's sex, but that's what kids do. And this is not a look at it with all wonderful things. No, this shows us the awful things that can happen without us even realizing it. It's not like people become alcoholics on purpose. They start out partying and drinking on weekends and the next thing you know they are hiding little bottles everywhere. Liquid courage for the smallest things like dinner with the family.

The thing I like is that we see the repercussions of Rebecca's actions. We watch as she finds her way and regains her footing and it shows us that there is hope and there is help.

I suggest this for mature readers because of the content, but honestly I think about any teenager in high school has seen things like this and it won't be anything new to them (the drinking, language and sex).

You can find this review and others like it on my blog at http://www.candacesbookblog.com

[shre ♡ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Swell is a story which I can tell had a lot of emotion and thought put into it. I dove into this novel expecting a light and easy contemporary romance, but this book gave me so much more. Julie has spun a magical tale of her own with harsh real life aspects thrown into it and depth even greater than the sea. The summary hinted at what was going to happen in the book, but it doesn't being to compare. It's just...SO.MUCH.MORE. One of the huge reasons why I loved it so much was that the author wasn't afraid to tackle teenage problems to add a sense of "reality" to the characters. I feel like most contemporary books these days have turned into...basically fairy-tales..except for young adults. So when I started reading the book and came across its many references to alcohol, drugs, serious life problems, and relationship problems...there were literally hearts floating above me when I threw my fists into the air and exclaimed: "Finally! A book where the biggest baddest problem isn't if your butt looks good in those jeans or not!" (Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating a bit...but still)

Beck is our misguided and confused main character for this novel. In the beginning she's a mess but at least she was a mess with brains, but that all changes when Christian Rusch picks her out of all the freshman to be his girlfriend. THE GOD of her high school has picked her, so of course, she can't just say no right? Little does she know the trouble she's gotten herself into by dating this selfish prick. Soon, as Beck becomes more and more involved in Christian's life, her own takes a turn for the worse. She starts drinking, partying and lying which eventually end up becoming the downfall of her. But before she can crumble entirely to the ground and not be able to pick herself up again, she learns to accept the fact that Christian is over-rated and just because everyone worships the ground he walks on doesn't mean she has to too. So as Beck tries to get over him, she eventually begins to find herself in the process again. She even meets the cutest guy in the world named Jesse, in her art class, when they're paired to work together. As her feelings for Jesse grow, so do the signs of danger coming from Christian. But Rebecca has moved on from Christian for good and doesn't want him back in her life again, so she does what anyone can do at this point, she puts her head up and stands her ground against the worst.

Personally, I loved all the characters in this book. Not because I have a thing for sadistic boyfriends or anything, but I loved that all of them produced some kind of strong emotion from me. YES. I am saying that I loved that I hated certain characters, it's crazy, I know, but who doesn't love Voldemort? *cough*. Even though Beck was the main character and I absolutely adored how resilient she became, I have to say that my favorite character in this whole book was Jesse. This is because, let's face it, the guys a keeper. He's so shy, but able to get Beck through the tough memories in her life that bring her into utter depression. He's pure-hearted, innocent, upbeat and the best guy for Beck, Christian totally pales in comparison to him. I swear to god guys, if I ever met someone like Christian Rusch at my own school..I would....you don't even want to know. He's repulsive and a pathetic excuse for a human being. The only kind of guy who would do something like to a girl is a demon...and he belongs in hell. As far as I'm concerned, he was probably even a waste of ink and paper.

Let me tell you this. This is not going to be an innocent, fun, jolly-go-lucky, overly romanticized novel that we (yes, I admit it) usually read. It's going to have big perks but even bigger problems. There will be crying, trauma, emotional break-downs, and let me repeat again..PROBLEMS. So if you don't like really emotional books, I don't recommend this to you. Although, if you're not sure, would I be able to convince you by saying that although it played with your feelings a lot it was cute and a breath of fresh air? I hope so...because guys...this book is worth it.

[Kristin · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book absolutely, positively tested my comfort level in reading. I don’t normally read contemporary novels and when I do, it’s usually from the young adult section. I have this thing about “leaving reality” and reading young adult still lets me *poof* out of my world.

But even though this is a YA title, Swell hit waaaaaaay too close to home for me. In so many ways, I could relate to the “mundane” world of Beck and the problems that grew out trying to become the person you think you want to be, to be with the person you want to be with. It was such a challenge to my soul and my memories of high school life to read this book. I really felt like I could have been Beck, had I just slipped down the path she took. I was so similar to Beck when I was a teenager.

I had a hard time reading Beck; I wanted to scream and throw things at her. She was selfish, stupid, immature and completely self-serving. And I think Ms. Duck completely captured an accurate teenager going through that awkward time in her life where she tries to find her place in high school. That’s probably why I didn’t like Beck – she reminded me of me back then. I was stupid like Beck. I used “liquid courage” to fit in back in my high school days. I ended up in some pretty stupid situations. And I’m extremely lucky that I survived as well as I did! I got very lucky; I have many close members of my family who are alcoholics. It would have been so easy for me to slip down that slope. That’s why I KNOW this story is accurate. This is teenage life.

The story and plot was a little slow going for the action junkie in me. But that’s the way this story should be; it is a steady decline in Beck’s life that you’re a witness to; reality.

At the time I read this I was fighting a migraine (aren’t I always?). Talk about being able to capture reality in words. All the “hangover” scenes made me feel worse. I had to put the book down and step away until I got my migraine under control. After that, no problems. Now, if I could figure a way to bill Ms. Duck for my extra pain meds (I’m sooooo kidding!!)

The setting, I believe, was highly accurate. I have not been to the exact area of Laguna Beach or Laguna Niguel that the story takes place in but I have been up to the area (I used to live in San Diego). My cousin lives in that area. It is hilly, it is beautiful, it is rich and affluent, funky, and Ms. Duck painted a great picture of the area. If you’ve never been to California you may not be able to picture the area on the beach where Beck went to drink by the train trestles, but that’s hard to explain to anyone who’s never been.

California is unique – just believe me when I say, “anything goes” there. So a toga party in high school… believable.

This is not a light read by any stretch. It has mature subject matter such as sex, rape, and of course, drinking. But as heavy as the story sounds, I will tell you that there is a reward at the end. I thoroughly enjoyed the very well done ending. I was in tears for the last two chapters. It was a welcome relief.

Any book that challenges my feelings like this is a good book by me. I’m such the wordsmith, no?

My entire review appeared on my blog: My ParaHangover

[Alexa (Once Upon a Chapter) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This review was originally posted at Pages of Forbidden Love

My Thoughts:

I really like to read “issue” books in the teen genre because I always feel they have great lessons to learn and some heartbreaking moments along the way. I was hoping when I started this book that I was going to get that great emotional journey and watch some bad and some good happen to the characters over the course of the story.

I liked the characters but I felt I didn’t really connect with any of them as well as I would have liked. I did like Beck and how she wanted to be the girl that was seen with the popular boy from school. I was interested in the beginning of the book about learning more about this popular boy, Christian, and what role he was going to have in the book. I have to say the side characters were pretty boring except for Jesse, when he finally shows up in the story that is. Most of the side characters are just props that add to the party scene that Beck and Christian find themselves in so much of the book. I guess it can be pretty hard to like more of the characters when they are just cloudy hazes on the pages because of how much they have had to drink. The shinning moment as far as characters go in this book was Jesse. Plain and simple he was the saving grace in this story and if he had not been in the book I would not have finished this one.

The plot was a bit weird for me personally to connect with because even though I am of legal age to drink I have never had a sip of alcohol in my life. I have never seen the point behind wasting money to drink myself into a hangover that would kill my head and make me puke the next day. So I have to say having a huge plot point be drunk teenagers was a little bit of a let down for me. I guess I just couldn’t connect very well with the journey that Beck was taking in this book. I did like the plot in the second half of the book much better than the beginning though because slowly over time Beck started to really pay attention to what her drinking so much really meant. She did have some moments of clarity between all of the drunk moments. Plus she got to meet Jesse and spend a lot of interesting moments around him and I loved how he made Beck think about things, how he was always there to help her but to also push her in the right direction, slowly but surely. Plus I did like the suspense of Beck being put in a horrible situation with Christian’s best friend due to her drinking way too much.

Overall, this book was a struggle for me at many points. I didn’t like all of the drinking that went on, I knew it was part of the plot but I didn’t think it was going to be that huge of a plot point over the course of the whole book. I did like that Beck had character growth in the book and that near the end she might just’ve figured out who she was suppose to be and what she was suppose to do in life. Everyone has to have a moment of realization at some point and I’m glad Jesse was there to help her get to where I think she needed to be by the end of the story. I would even go so far to say I wish the ending of the book was longer because the last 50 pages were my favorite of the book.

3.5 hearts (stars)

[Tee loves Kyle Jacobson · Rating 5 out of 5]

HOLY HADES! SWEET BABY JESUS! TOTALLY EPIC!

These words don't really describe what this story did for me. Julie really knows how to write a book with so much emotion and truth that once you read it and get to the end you feel like you have been punched in the gut. I started reading Swell and I knew from the blurb that there was going to be something not so nice going on but what I found really hit home for me. Alcoholism in teens is rampant in this day and age and has always been. This story gripped me for two reasons and the first being that I had a best friend in high school who went through the same thing. She was not very popular until she started dating the captain of the soccer team. I remember us talking and she could not believe it because as she said she was a nobody. Their relationship was destructive to put it mildly but in the end he used her and sent her packing and she could not handle that after being with him for a year she drank herself to death with pure vodka. The second thing is adults and parents especially need to pay attention to their child because young love and drugs and alcohol are such an important right of passage in school for teens.

Rebecca is just your normal artsy freshmen in school. She has everything going for her until she is personally chosen by Christian the schools resident God. He has everything in Rebecca's eyes. He is popular and athletic and handsome and everyone wants to be with him but he has picked her out of all the girls. As she gets caught up in his life she soon finds herself doing things she wouldn't normally do. She is drinking and partying and telling lies to her family and friends. As her world and relationship with Christian spirals out of control Rebecca is left wondering what is going on. Christian soon breaks up with her and her drinking really does pick up. As she tries to move on Christian still has his hooks in her and her time is running out because she will do anything for her next drink.

Then school starts and she tries to out her freshmen year past her. She tries to put Christian out of her mind but he is like a bad penny and keeps coming around. Then she is art and gets partnered with the sweet and gorgeous Jesse for her project. At first she and Jesse are platonic but it soon becomes clear that Jesse has feelings for her. Rebecca realizes that she sort of does like Jesse but as always Christian is a ball of destruction and tries to put a damper on their friendship. But Rebecca has had enough of Christian and decides it is time to get help and with Jesse by her side standing by her through the worse she will find healing and rehab. What will Christian do when he realizes he has finally lost Rebecca? Will Rebecca be able to stop drinking and seek the help she needs?

This is one story I HIGHLY recommend teens read. This is a raw and true account of how teens use drugs and alcohol to ease their pain. Love hurts and sucks when your body is full of emotions and hormones but alcohol and drugs are never the way to ease the pain. Once the high wears off the problem is still there. If you are a teen and need help please please reach out for help. Someone loves you and is out there waiting to help you.

[Crystal ✬ Lost in Storyland · Rating 3 out of 5]

Beck's life falls into chaos after she starts dating Christian and he introduces her to alcohol. Beck was a good girl with a true bestie and an artistic talent that promises to take her places. Her fatal flaw was lusting after Christian and seeking him out after he pays attention to her in a party. To lay it out there, she's the stupid, naive teenager that trusts the older, hot, lustful guy. Because she doesn't want to seem the innocent girl that she is, she tries to keep pace with his alcoholic, partying life and quickly grows addicted to it. One might say that she had it coming, the horrible thing that happens / almost happens to her. As she falls further into a downward spiral, she pushes away the people who really care about her and goes to the extremes to get her hands on alcohol.

Christian is popular and two years older than her, and they didn't hang out at all before the party. Even after they start dating, they spend most of their time drinking together. There isn't any explanation for why he would fall madly in love with her, as it seems he does, or why he'd do all the things he does to her. He's a closed person who seems to have little motivation for what he does and doesn't do. He seems only to live for the drink. Overall, Christian is a horrible person, and I'd love to call him a bunch of names if I only knew where to start. Jesse was by far my favorite character. He's funny, witty, and loves Beck for who she really is. My only problem is that he doesn't tell this important thing to her about himself that might have helped her relate to him better and faster. The way he doesn't talk about it makes it seem like he was hiding it from her, so I really didn't understand how chill he was about it at the end--or that we find out about it at the end in the first place.

There are a lot of holes in the structure of the story. The writing is good, but many of the threads don't connect. It feels as though the story jumps from scene to scene, and it takes a while to get into the story and understand what happens. It starts so abruptly and doesn't give you breathing space before continuing with the story. The context isn't well developed. I also believe that it could have spent a lot less time on cultivating Beck's downward spiral and focus on the period where she finally realizes what an alcohol addict she is and begins to recover. It feels as though the book is trying to tell two stories the way it is--the one where the good girl turns bad and the one where she pulls her life back together again.

I do like how alcoholism and Beck's downward spiral is portrayed. Okay, I did want to yell at Beck and pull out her hair for being the idiot that she is, driving away her true friends and worshipping alcohol as she does. That's also the strength of this story--the emotions that it evokes within the reader. I also appreciate how the story shows the repercussions of Beck's behavior and her struggles to pull herself together again. It isn't a story that I'd read again--it was so intense and disturbing--but it's the kind of story someone ought to read once.

Mature content warning - drinking, language, sex

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For more of my reviews, visit my blog Imaginary Reads.

[Jay · Rating 4 out of 5]

Swell is a book about a girl who has taken too many wrong directions and decisions, all before the age of 16. The story revolves around Beck, a plain jane who finally gets admitted to the world of the popular crowd when Christian, the smart, hot, and "in" guy ends up being her boyfriend. However what she didn't sign up for was his drinking habits, and her needing to always keep up with them. Enter her drinking problem that she swats away as a "way to relax". The drinking just kept on getting more and more out of hand. I was in awe by what Beck would do just to be able to get her hands on a 6-pack of beer. Beck's best friend notices her issue immediately and tries to help her but when Beck resists she tells her that she doesn't want to get tangled up in all of this. I understand where she's coming from. She's not really abandoning her, but she's just 15 for god's sake! she doesn't know whether to tell on her to her parents, or be more patient with her and label it as a phase, or to just stay away from her! Also some of the situations Beck ended up in just to get her hands on alcohol were downright scary and dangerous.

The beginning, Julie tricks you in thinking this is a typical cute contemporary where the girl finally gets her chance with the hot guy all the girls want and the one she's been secretly crushing on for ages. Then all of this sense of safety and happiness is ripped from you when you notice the constant drinking. I am not exaggerating when I say the word alcohol, or any type of it or the consumption of it showed up on every single page of this book. I was afraid for Beck, I couldn't believe that her parents didn't notice their daughter's behavior and hangovers and when they did, they gave her a chance, then a second, then a third. I felt that they weren't strict towards her and kept on blindly believing that she'll stay clean. A horrible, huge thing had to happen for Beck to finally realize how deep the pit she dug herself in was and that she really is an alcoholic. This frustrated me to no ends but who am I to tell them to think logically? that is what addiction does to you I guess.

I really enjoyed Julie's narration. At the beginning of every chapter there is a paragraph or two about something that happens in the future. You only get snippets of it at the beginning of each chapter but from that you know the road she is heading to isn't a pleasant or safe one. The characters were all so real, there was no sugar coating anything. Some of them just didn't have a good side, and some of them were downright evil in my opinion. Swell is such a realistic book. I am sure, in this century, many kids end up in situations like this when they get with the wrong crowd and have no confidence or individuality to fight the peer pressure they get to fit in. I recommend this novel to all realistic fiction lovers and anyone wanting to read a story about a love gone wrong.

[Rachael · Rating 4 out of 5]

This review first appeared @ Moosubi Reviews!

SWELL is an incredibly emotional and realistic story. Throughout the novel, I felt pity and hope, and almost everything in between. I did have some issues with the novel, but as a whole, I definitely felt like it was worth my time, and was a rewarding read.

I’m lucky enough to live in an area where the neighborhood is extremely safe, and underage drinking or smoking is almost unheard of. That being said, SWELL is one of those books that kind of shocked me, but is definitely something that I can think of as realistic. Hopefully this isn’t too much of a spoiler, but Beck does develop a drinking problem but refuses to admit it. It’s nice that an author does right about these difficult issues, and I felt that it does spread awareness as to the negative effects it has, as well as why seemingly innocent teens succumb to alcohol.

The writing was also full of emotion, something that I really value in contemporaries. I felt that it helped to connect me more to the main character, and it was clear that she suffered through so much. There were some moments of happiness, as well as periods of struggle. Whenever she had a struggle, it felt like I struggled with her, and I felt so bad for her sake. She’s also not a perfect character by far, but she is a realistic one. Whenever she made a bad decision, I almost screamed at her to stop, because I felt that I really cared about her well being!

My only complaint is that the story seemed to rely on some clichés. There was the extremely popular, but handsome and nice guy, the beautiful but always supportive best friend, the wild party girl who’s not really a “true friend”, the quiet loner guy who ends up being the love interest, etc. At some points in the story, I could tell what was going to happen, since I felt like the author used these archetypes to shape her own characters.

Still, I felt like overall, SWELL was an emotional but realistic read, definitely worth my time and shocking at the same time. I highly recommend this to contemporary-realistic fans looking for an emotional rollercoaster, or a read that is shocking, lyrical, but still realistic.

*On a side note, there is another very serious issue that this book deals with, and it was actually one of the strongest points of the book. To me, it was also pretty apparent after reading parts of the first couple chapters, but I don’t want to give spoilers, so I will avoid directly stating it. However, Julie Rieman Duck’s interpretation of the issue was very realistic and emotional, but also very serious. Hopefully teens will read this book and learn about both issues she deals with in this book and will be aware.*

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Warning: Swell deals with issues like attempted rape, teenage drinking, and alcoholism.

Wow! You don't come across a book like Swell too often. It is pretty different than what I normally read. It deals with some very dark issues, and things get ugly at times, but I was in awe of Swell. Julie Rieman Duck is a powerful writer. She wrote characters that made mistakes, were flawed, did things I didn't agree with and she made me love them anyways. That is what had me in awe. Both Julie and Swell really impressed me.

Right away, I identified with Rebecca. Starting high school can be a scary experience and the fact that this book starts out when she is just a freshman made it even more of a statement. Rebecca was just 15 years old. And she liked a boy. And she wanted to impress that boy. The alcohol starts flowing pretty early on, and it was easy for me to see that Rebecca was going to have a problem with it. Actually, a lot of the characters in Swell had a problem with alcohol it seemed like. It was a recurring theme. I wasn't around a huge party scene in high school, so it was kind of scary to see how many people came in regular/daily contact with booze.

I loved, loved, loved Rebecca's best friend. She is the kind of friend everyone should have. She stood up for Rebecca when people were hurting or embarrassing her but most importantly she was observant and she made her opinions known of what she thought of Rebecca's drinking.

I loved Julie Rieman Duck's writing style. About the first third of the book starts each chapter out with a flash forward of glimpses of a horrible thing happening to someone, and with each chapter we found out a little more and got a little closer to said act actually happening. I thought it was a really unique and effective technique. Even though, I didn't agree with the choices that Rebecca made, this was very much her own journey. I was sad that she was taken down this road so early in life, but she made her own choices. Normally, if I don't agree with a character, that means that I won't like them. And if I don't like a character, that normally means that I won't like a book. But the awesome thing about Swell is that it didn't matter that I didn't agree with Rebecca's choices all the time. I still connected with her and I completely connected with the story. It sucked me in and I am still thinking about it long after I finished reading. Swell is a great book.

[Mlpmom (Book Reviewer) · Rating 4 out of 5]

“This is going to be a hard book to review.” Those thoughts crossed my mind after reading the first chapter of this book.

This book starts off with you knowing that the main character Beck has gotten herself into a really bad situation. One involving, alcohol, boys she doesn't like, and maybe even drugs.

I could tell this was going to be a tough read and more than likely and even tougher review to write once I was done.

These kind of books, where the main character goes to such extremes (never good) to get the attention of the popular crowd, to earn their “respect” and in the process losing herself, they are always hard to read because I know it really happens...Every. Single. Day. And that just breaks my heart.

Beck broke my heart. That she developed such a problem with alcohol that she “pimped” herself out in order to get it and didn't see anything wrong with that and the numerous other things she did. She was only 15. Gah! I almost wanted to stop reading this book because it was so sad to see her self destruct.

Christian. Oh Christian. I really wanted to like him. I tried, I really did. I knew he was a lost little boy that had a lot of growing up to do. But the fact that he claimed to love Beck and then do the things he did...it just didn't sit well with me.

Jesse was a breath of fresh air to this novel. He was everything Beck needed. Support, reassure, comedy, real friendship. I couldn't help it. I liked him from the start.

I'm not going to tell you how this one ends. Whether Christian redeemed himself. Whether Beck grew up and started making better choices. Whether Jesse stayed in her life and became more, just stayed a friend or was only there for a moment when she needed him most. Because, you are going to have to read this one yourself.

This is not a YA read. It has very mature content. Drinking, drugs, sex references, language, assault, peer pressure..it is a very mature read but one that I think older teens would appreciate because, like I mentioned above, these things really happen. Young adults experience some of them (hopefully not all of them) every single day.

Every subject heavy or light was handled very nicely. The story flowed well and it was an emotional read. It didn't make me cry but it did bring out a lot of other emotions along the way, some good, some bad.

I give this 4 very solid Stars!

[Donna · Rating 3 out of 5]

Swell is a story that deals with a lot of issues in our society nowadays from teen drinking to alcoholism and to rape. And I have to admit, I definitely wasn't prepared for this book before I started it. I knew the basics of the story but I didn't know just how deep the author would take it, and well yeah I was more than a little shocked but in a totally realistic way because, if anything, this story is realistic and I think there needs to be more books like this out there in the world.

Beck is our main character who experiences everything for the first time when she meets popular school boy, Christian. However, Beck doesn't realise that Christian has more problems than anyone ever thought and he's soon dragging Beck down with him. As the story unravels we watch both characters lose more and more of themselves to alcohol and with the story being told from Beck’s prospective, it’s a story that’s quite emotional – one that I didn’t always connect with at time but emotional nonetheless. I found it hard as a reader to watch the trouble that Beck was getting herself into, I wanted her to fight more but drinking just because the solution to all her problems. It isn’t until Beck meets Jesse that things start to look brighter for her but still, she’s not without problems.

As a reader, author Julie Riemann Duck gives you glimpses to a huge turning point for Beck at the start of each chapter – one that’s quite difficult to not get emotionally attached to because you can just see what’s going to come and you can’t help sympathise for Beck. Without this turning point, I don’t think it would have given Beck the strength she needed, so while it was always going to be a difficult subject, I think the author handled it very well.

All in all, while Swell isn’t a favourite of mine, I did still enjoy reading it. If you enjoy realistic stories, then this is the book for you.

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read Swell in just two days. From the first instant I read it, simply couldn't stop. The story grabbed my interest from the get go. This is one of those books that keeps you thinking afterwards. Characters become familiar to you and you cannot help but try to understand them by constantly learning their next move.

Duck gives us characters to remember. Beck and Christian are complex characters. We see and understand everything through Beck's POV.

Beck changes so drastically that at some point you cannot help but ask: where is the girl from the beginning, the one who knew little about the world around her? She just changes according to how hectic her life becomes. To me Beck is many things and those impressions change with the development of the story. At first she is naive, then she becomes voraciously intrepid in her quest to keep up with her alcohol happy boyfriend. Later she is reckless and finally she is a new person but now is someone who is her own person.

Christian is the trigger in Beck's life. He destroys her little by little, but her love craving heart doesn't see it that way. One of the things that kept me reading was wanting to know if Beck was OK. Every chapter, I read that little paragraph of Beck and simply had to end the chapter. Those little scenes were crude and strong.

Author Julie Duck brought us this thought provoking tale of love and strength of character. I am impressed by Duck's skillful way of transmitting these stories impregnated with the crudeness of reality. I read A Place In This Life (which I loved) but now Swell is my favorite book from this author. She has a fierce way of explaining the world and is fearless when building the world in which her characters are going to thrive in...or end themselves.

Source: provided by author for an honest review.

[Kathryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Actually 4.5 stars.....

Whew!! This book is a roller coaster of events that takes you to the top of the high hills, then down to the low valleys, and then twists you all up and when you think you are coming to the end, throws a loop in there to make sure you felt the whole ride....
Well, when I finished Swell, that is exactly how I felt. Like I came off the most tumultuous, stomach clenching, heart-wrenching, head-swooning ride ever.
From the very beginning of Swell until the very end, you are held captive by what is happening to Rebecca...aka Beck. Watching her rationalize every decision, allows you to see exactly what is going on in her thought processes. Seeing why she made the decisions she did was very hard to take. It was not something that I could truly relate to, yet it allowed me to understand. Her relationship with Christian made me so angry and when a certain event happened (of course I will not say since I don't reveal story line); I was then beginning to have some hope in a different outcome. Of course, I should have known that the "loop" at the end of this roller coaster, that completely was expected yet not ready for, really tears you up. It is the true eye-opener for the serious issues being written about in this book.
Yet within every situation, there is always someone that can be a ray of hope. The one person that can bring you through the storm. This special person in Swell is Jesse. He was so refreshing and brought the light in this book that for the most part was so dark.
Wonderfully written, Swell, touches on subjects that many of today's teens are experiencing. It is not a light read by any means, but one that will tug at the heart and really make you see that being yourself is much better than trying to fit in.

www.tsktskwhattoread2.blogspot.com

[Jennifer Fry · Rating 5 out of 5]

Julie Rieman Duck's newest book, SWELL, takes an intense look into the damaging effects of teenage alcoholism. We follow Rebecca, an outcast artsy-type, who is sucked into Cristan's (the high school god) world of popularity, partying, and booze. As we begin, we already see the trouble Rebecca's gotten into, as each chapter reveals a small tidbit of a horrible, violent scene, then takes us back to how it all began.

We believe Rebecca because she is just a normal high school girl who wants more than anything to be noticed and fit in, even if that means meeting everyone else's expectations instead of her own. We watch as she develops her infatuation equally with alcohol and her new boyfriend, and how this takes her into a world of risky behavior with profound consequences.

SWELL is a roller coaster ride of emotion – we are rooting for Rebecca and we want her to find a way out of the mess she has created, but we also are able to understand, thanks to Ms. Duck's masterful character development, why Rebecca is too deep into her own problems to see them clearly. Ms. Duck's use of first person in this book is strong; everything about her main character is believable, even understandable. While many of the scenes in SWELL are incredibly emotional, Ms. Duck writes them with a more clinical approach, letting the reader put her own spin on the truth depth of emotion in them.

SWELL is a must read book for teen girls because it allows the reader to go down the road of risky high school behavior and experience the consequences, and most importantly, it communicates the value young women must place in themselves.

[Bella · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review to come.

[Sam · Rating 3 out of 5]

Swell deals with a big issue: teenage drinking. I didn't exactly feel comfortable reading about it but the author handled it well and gave the book a dark twist to keep you interested. If you love new adult contemporary then Swell is worth checking out.

When our main character, Beck, speaks to Christian Rusch for the first time, she's head over heels. Christian is popular, rich and full of words that can bring girls to their knees. Though Beck doesn't know that Christian has a special relationship with booze, and soon she is tempted by the liquid every single day. Then she meets Jesse Leary, a funny and charming guy who she just can't get out of her head. Fights are started, relationships are broken, and, under all the alcohol, Beck needs to find herself.

I found it very hard to connect with the main character, Beck, since she was reckless, irresponsible and absolutely crazy. I felt that she could have used her brain a tad more to avoid some horrible situations in the book. Anyhow, I did enjoy Jesse, a boy we meet later on in the book who offers Beck support and friendship. He was kind and funny and basically one of the most down-to-earth guys you could ever meet.

Swell wasn't one of my favourite reads, but it was a good pass-time. If your looking for a quick and thought-provoking read then pick Swell up!

[Medeia Sharif · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rebecca’s alcohol addiction starts out small and then becomes too big for her to handle. When she meets Christian, a boy in her school who’s older than her, she gets to party and feel loved. Christian sends her mixed messages, sometimes loving her and other times pushing her away. Meanwhile, Rebecca drinks and drinks, either by herself or with him.

When Jesse, Rebecca’s art class partner, enters the scene, she’s torn between the two boys. They have irresistible qualities and the attraction is undeniable. Both of them can save her in different ways, but only one of them can enable her to save herself from the alcoholism that’s ravaging her life.

This is edgy YA that incorporates serious issues like teen alcoholism and rape. Many books these days have love triangles, but it didn’t seem stale in this novel. The ending is something amazing…it was emotional, moving, and softened up a story that was otherwise hard and gritty.

[Ioanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

20/04/2020 first time back in 2012 I gave it 4 stars but don't remember it, I started it today and at first thought ok i am tooold for teenage drama, but it's well written and it is not cliche teenage drama and it has a best friend that actually behaves as one...
But I don't like inconsistency ....one minute she verifies something Jesse told her she did and she is shocked then she talks with her best friend and says that he told her something she did but she thinks that really didn't happen and he lies . But that's probably editor's fault? Like this passage should be in another page?
Overall it's a very good book in this gerne, there are some more things I didn't like but it's me I guess because the more I like a book stricter I get with it

[Mana · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5*