God, Sex, and Rich People

by Mattie Jo Cowsert

What happens when an Evangelical pastor's daughter from Branson, Missouri moves to New York City? A collapse of identity that begins a journey to figure out faith, f*cking, and the 1%. With humor and raw honesty, God, Sex, and Rich People follows Mattie Jo as she takes off her purity ring, navigates public transportation, and tries to have good sex without hating herself. From dating her doorman, to sex with a pop star, to living with millionaires, watch Mattie Jo hilariously fumble and find her footing, as she redefines her sexuality and spirituality in the city that never sleeps (and never stops sleeping around).

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Religion, Biography Memoir, Faith

324 pages, Paperback

First published September 10, 2024

Reviews

[Elissa Anne · Rating 5 out of 5]

*I received an advanced review copy

Mattie Jo has written a delightful memoir about evangelical deconstruction, particularly purity culture. Her vibrant personality comes through on every page, making this an easy, entertaining read.

Mattie delves into what she was raised to believe, and how she eventually deconstructed hell, evangelism and mission work. She shares stories of a mission trip she went on to Indonesia and how questions began to arise for her. She talks about some of the books she read that encouraged deeper questions about Jesus, the Bible, and Christianity as a whole. 

The book also explores Mattie’s dating and sexual relationships. She shares her firsthand experience so that others can hopefully deconstruct purity culture sooner than she did, and perhaps in a healthier way. Mattie was often punishing herself for having sex by having it with people who didn’t really respect her or care much about her pleasure. Some experiences were certainly worse and more abusive than others. I look forward to her next memoir where she delves into sexual abuse trauma. She also has some longer term relationships and talks about going to therapy to work through sexual trauma and navigate adult sexual relationships and ethics - which is something we probably all need! Especially those of us raised in purity culture.

Lighter topics include moving to New York; working for, living with, and relating to wealthy people; studying and becoming an actress.

I appreciated Mattie wearing her emotions on her sleeve, and building her confidence with daily affirmations. I loved her book and her exuberant, expressive and extroverted personality.

[Jamie · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I tell you the Tea is PIPING hot in God, Sex and Rich People by @mattiejocowsert I’m not joking.
I absolutely L O V E D every bit of this book and consumed it so fast.
⛪️Her writing is LOL funny.
⛪️Her truths are #relatable as a born/raised Catholic.
⛪️Her vulnerability is unmatched.

If you have EVER struggled with religion, your own shame around S3X because of your religion & definitely thought you’d burn in hell for thinking about un-god like things.. PLEASE pick this book up.

Some of the realities Mattie Jo recognized throughout her book are ones as a former Catholic school girl myself truly struggled with growing up and through relationships in my 20s.

I found so much healing for myself through her pages written in such truth and hilarious ways.
Views that were forced upon me from my schools were based upon extreme bubbles of the world that didn’t recognize God’s love for A L L people (not people that just fit into the straight, white, conservative box!)

As a book reviewer- I recognize there are some biases when we read books by friends or authors we connect with, had I never even known @mattiejocowsert ,this book would STILL be a 5 star for me!

Amazing job to an amazingly brave, vulnerable, hilarious and genuinely kind soul.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[Tiffany 🍒 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Once I put down my notepad and accepted that it was entirely too quotable to write EVERYTHING down that resonated with me or made me laugh, I found it SO EASY to get lost in this book. Reading more like a blog-slash-Sex & the City narration, sometimes it felt like I was sitting across from the author and having these discussions with her, myself.

Although I grew up as a—what she calls— “casual Christian,” my views about myself were very similar to hers! So reading this book was extremely validating for my inner teen girlie. It also made me question some concepts ingrained in my psyche that I was so sure I had unlearned in many years of therapy!

While my religious views are somewhat more conservative (gag lol) than hers, I appreciate her ability to call out the hypocrisy and patriarchal views of the church, especially in the south. It is so validating to see my thoughts echoed in this book as a socially left-leaning Christian.

At first I felt that the ending was rushed, but then I realized I just didn’t want it to end! It was so good and I will 100% be recommending this book to women who struggle with Christian guilt—whether that’s bc of premarital sex, being pro-LGBTQ, being a skeptic, or whatever other reason that troubles them. Or anyone who just need a good laugh! This book had me cackling at work, at Starbucks, in the dentist office, in bed at night, and every other place I traveled to while reading this book.

Side characters I appreciated:
Colin!!! - I had the biggest book crush on him.
Eddie - ever the supportive and insightful brother. He felt like a warm hug.
Mormon dude - I loved their friendship.
Zorro - He was perfect. I was rooting for them, but loved that MJ prioritized her happiness.
Her parents - love them for being so cool
Laurel - just kidding. FTB.

This book comes out on September 10th! I was given permission to read this book prior to the release date in exchange for an honest review.❤️

[Bree Dyer · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read memoir. In her debut, Mattie Jo Cowsert has written a moving account of her journey growing up evangelical in the Midwest and her subsequent deconstruction after moving to NYC. It’s laugh out loud funny, as Cowsert tries to navigate the world of the ultra wealthy as a babysitter for billionaires. She also takes you on an emotional journey as she confronts purity culture and questions everything she learned growing up. Whether you’re going through your own deconstruction or grew up an atheist this story is for you. You won’t want to miss this book!

[Lauren Leonard · Rating 5 out of 5]

I just finished this book, and I have a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes! It was so validating and insightful. Eddie stole the show with his deep wisdom! I found myself analyzing some of my own behaviors and thought processes that need work and grace. You can take the girl out of evangelicalism, but it'll be a lifetime of taking the evangelical out of the girl.

Thank you for this vulnerable and beautiful snapshot into what it's truly like to deconstruct! I am humbled and encouraged

[Kaytlyn Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve followed Mattie Jo on Instagram for a while and have really enjoyed hearing her story. I knew I had to purchase her book when it came out. If you lived through purity culture and struggled/still struggle with the repercussions, this is the book for you. There were so many times while reading this book where I felt like the author was writing thoughts from my own head. It’s hard to imagine that so many of us had very similar experiences, but it feels so validating to hear another person’s journey away from those teachings. She is funny, thoughtful, blunt and honest and the book was a joy to read. I think anyone who is recovering from purity culture would benefit from this book.

[Niki McCann · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mattie Jo writes a hilarious memoir that brilliantly explains the unique experience of millennials making their way out of the deeply shameful true-love-waits/purity subculture of the 2000’s. She captures the true concerns of spending eternity in hell because you kiss a boy that won’t be your husband and balances it with the freedom that comes with maturing to live a life of loving yourself outside of only guarding your sexuality. Funny, honest, and relatable regardless of if you grew up wearing a band on your left hand or not, this is a must read.

[Em Rich · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book had me crying and laughing already in the first chapter. And it doesn’t let up! Made me feel really seen and validated in my experiences in the church, and I would have loved to have been able to read this book earlier in my deconstruction journey. I’m now sharing with my partner and friends so that they can understand my background and experiences better! The author writes in a really engaging way, it flows and has you just wanting to keep reading and reading. Really grateful that a book like this exists. Absolutely recommend! Regardless of your spiritual background.

[Michelle Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Where was this book 7-10 years ago when I desperately needed it??? Mattie Jo is a great writer who does a phenomenal job of capturing her (and others’) evangelical to EXvangelical experience. So glad this book exists!

[Elizabeth Lake Brecht · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book was not it for me. I was so excited to read it after having read similar books in the deconstructive evangelical genre. However, I would not have read this book had I know that it was basically rage hatred towards her Christian upbringing and all of the loose, light, downright uncomfortable, & offensive things she said about Jesus & God. This book should not be marketed towards Christians or denoted as religious imo

[Leigh LCA · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars
Thank you Mattie Jo for being so open and honest.

[Natalie Rohlman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredibly fun to read!

Love, love, love! This very raw, very real, and at times very funny testimony of faith deconstruction and finding one’s self really hit home for me. It was incredibly fun to read. Highly recommend! Proud of you, MJ!

[Kelsey · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book so much! It was insightful and comical. I grew up in the same town as Mattie Jo and could relate to so many of her experiences. I joke that we didn’t just grow up in the Bible Belt, but the Buckle of the Bible Belt. I love that she is speaking out about the trauma that many others may not even realize is considered trauma. Way to go Mattie!!

[Summer · Rating 3 out of 5]

This memoir presents an unexpected journey that differs from what I anticipated. I went into this book expecting a thoughtful exploration of religious deconstruction, the impact of evangelical upbringing, and a look into engaging with a more affluent population in adulthood. Instead, I found the narrative primarily focused on the author’s sexual experiences, which, while candid and detailed, felt like too much in a story that I had hoped would center more on the psychological and cultural journey of deconstructing her faith.

The memoir is fast paced and easy to read, and the author’s vulnerability in sharing her experiences is admirable. However, for someone looking for a deeper, more balanced reflection on the complexities of leaving behind an evangelical lifestyle, this book may leave them disappointed. The author touches on the harm of religion and purity culture, an important discussion that felt far too brief compared to the more explicit content.

While I can appreciate that everyone has different ways of navigating personal freedom and growth, the focus on the author’s sex life felt disproportionate to the book’s larger themes (introduced in the title of the book). I had hoped for a more well-rounded exploration of her journey beyond her hometown, but instead, the memoir leans heavily into her personal escapades. It’s clear that this is a highly personal account, but the shift in focus may not resonate with all readers, especially those interested in a more nuanced exploration of faith, identity, and growth.

While there are elements of this memoir that are powerful and necessary, the overwhelming emphasis on the author’s sex life detracted from the bigger conversation I had expected. Those looking for a more traditional narrative on religious deconstruction or self-discovery may find this book to be an unexpected and somewhat unbalanced read.

[Kris Kettering · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mostly sex, alot about so-called Christians (so, not God exactly but people spouting lies in His name), and a little bit about a few rich people.

Not completely misleading as titles go, but not completely accurate as a descriptor of what you are going to be reading.

Def not for those who have a problem with graphic descriptions of sex acts and a LOT of swear words. Then again, people who have a problem with that content are NOT going to pick this book up...and that's sad, because some of them could possibly benefit from reading about Maddie Jo's journey from a buttoned-up practically non-existent sex life due to her evangelical upbringing to an enlightened, sex-positive view.

Her views of God at the end are not entirely clear - and that's fine by me, at least bec I am in the same boat. I believe in a good and loving Jesus, and I don't believe in all of the BS the fundies/evangelicals/Project 2025 people are spouting. If that makes me a Jezebel, apostate, heretic, whatever I'm fine with that and I'm clearly in good company.

Another book in the EX-vangelical memoir deluge.

[Michelle Harrison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mattie Jo successfully and succinctly articulates the building and deconstruction of personal belief systems in her freshmen book: God, Sex, and Rich People. Having been Mattie Jo’s sorority sister in college (Princess Family forever IYKYK) and deeply loyal social media and blog cheerleader, I felt cozy and familiar within her words. I consider myself lucky and privileged to know her (thank you for introducing me and my dad to Bart Ehrman) and was reminded of her vest for life, unbelievable resilience, and wit within her words. If you, like me, can relate to Mattie Jo’s upbringing and/or deconstruction, this book (and her next) will wrap you in a tight hug of knowing and peace.

[Etta Madden · Rating 3 out of 5]

A humorous romp through a not-so-humorous topic: the self-destructive behaviors of a young woman from Southwest Missouri who grew up in the "purity culture" of an Evangelical community. Through a journey with stops at theater camp, undergraduate musical theater studies, and a decade in New York City, the author describes the actions that for outsides to her experiences may seem at times surreal. Mattie Jo Cowsert professes to have learned much through the many encounters and relationships of her twenties and promises in her closing that another book is on the way. She may leave readers wonderful where she may go next . . .

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was like meeting a new person and immediately diving deep into each other’s religious past. Cowherd wrote conversationally so it read fast and was fun. The exhaustive detail about her sex life seemed like a lot to have out there in a book to me, but you do you. It was relevant, as it showed her working through the shame and hangups she had to free herself from, but it started to feel like she was legalistic in the opposite direction – as if leaving out a sexual encounter would be lying by omission.

[Jen Johnson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I would round this up to 3.5 stars. I grew up under similar purity culture teachings, so Cowsert’s origin story is familiar. While I didn’t teach all the same conclusions she did, I’m glad she’s in a place of health. Most of my quibble with this memoire is tone - there are times where she uses humor that feels like a thin disguise for condescension - like the time she said her apartment “contained more diversity than the state of Missouri.”

[Melissa Spiers · Rating 5 out of 5]

Truly the next gen Carrie Bradshaw, Mattie Jo's book is full of gossipy fun insider knowledge from the NYC rich-people life, the struggling artist life, and even the survivor-of-evangelical-purity-culture nonsense. She is a very fun writer - her energy leaps off the page, her style is engaging, and her stories are terrific. A great beach read, travel read, vacation read. Highly recommend!

[Eriana · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you’ve deconstructed or are currently deconstructing from evangelical culture and beliefs, this is a must-read. Also, if you like juicy stories about young adults galavanting around NYC making questionable choices, piping hot tea, and/or laughing through the trauma, this is also 100% for you. I flew through it and couldn’t put it down.

Beyond the humor, you’ll find reflection and insights on evangelical culture in the U.S. For someone who was raised in it, I found this book extremely cathartic. Mattie Jo has a clear, developed voice, and I found her style really fun to read. I’m happy this book is in the world and will be recommending it to a lot of friends!

[Jami Lynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

A poignant and refreshing take on midwestern, religious and purity culture. Cowsert presents an honest deep dive into a world unbendingly rigorous and often times hypocritically focused on shame and guilt. She unapologetically details her experiences, giving insight into a culture that is primarily unknown to many. For those who enjoy deep cuts, this is a powerful read.

[Caroline · Rating 3 out of 5]

There were parts of this book that hit home like whoa, and she was very brave to lay bare so many of her most intimate, sometimes painful moments and bring humor to them, too. At times I felt her take on faith was a too irreverent and too disdainful, in a way that got distracting. For that reason, I also struggled to see where she’d firmly landed in her deconstruction, outside the realm of sex positivity. I loved the down-to-earth practicality and grace of her parents.

[D N H · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was raised Christian and moved to NYC to pursue theatre, so I really expected to connect with this book. The writing is agonizingly bad — reads like the diary of an 8th grader. I can only read “Cue the record scratch”, “LOL”, or “WTF” so many times before I just have to put it down.

[Stacy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had a similar journey, coming from an evangelical background and going straight from that to art school! I laughed and teared up and highlighted a lot of quotes. I found Mattie's story thought-provoking and comforting.

[Clarissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a helpful book for deconstructing purity culture and religious trauma. Mattie Jo says what we’re all thinking, but executes the delivery of her experience with humor and self-compassion, necessary ingredients in this difficult work.

[Eady Jay · Rating 5 out of 5]

My favorite memoir of 2024!
Mattie Jo has a vibrant personality that shines through on every page as she describes her journey of deconstructing Evangelicalism and untangling herself from purity culture.

[Zoe · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was so funny, honest, and just overall so enjoyable!! Definitely recommend!!

[Amanda Dow · Rating 5 out of 5]

I LOVED this book! Mattie is such a relatable author and writes from true experiences! This book is full of funny stories, hard truths, and lots of wisdom! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[Laura Maurizio · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thoroughly enjoyed. So many open and honest stories- some incredibly relatable.