The Rest of Our Lives

by Judy Goldman

A lively and poignant exploration of life’s latter decades.

In The Rest of Our Lives, memoirist Judy Goldman brings her devoted readers dispatches from the edge of life, when turning eighty can be as surprising and baffling as losing your virginity or seeing The Beatles at Shea Stadium. In this lively and poignant exploration of aging, Goldman circles to those other uncharted moments of our lives when we are at once anxious and excited about just what might happen next. Goldman’s telling and retelling of pivotal stories of her own family and friends—romances, births, late-night taxi-cab rides, falls, frailty, and even death—are altogether new in her hands.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction

198 pages, Paperback

Published May 6, 2025

Reviews

[Kim Church · Rating 5 out of 5]

A warm, wise memoir about life at eighty. Full of timeless truths, the book is a treasure, to be cherished as you would a close friend. The ending is perfect.

[Sharon · Rating 2 out of 5]

I found it a bit of a drag to get through this book. It’s full of a lot of platitudes from someone living a very privileged life. I guess we’re all going to face death and everyone processes these things differently, but this book did not resonate with me on any level. I’ve also lost both my parents. I’ve also dealt with the things she talks about, but I’m not having a pity party.

[Pam Jackson · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed “The Rest of our Lives.” It was delightful as well as thought provoking. I loved how the characters had different thoughts on aging. The novel lets the reader into the lives of the characters and their relationships with each other. They are learning to accept and enjoy being in their 80’s. The feeling is that it is great to be in your 80’s because you can be who really are. One of my favorite quotes in the novel is, “we learn to be okay with the difference between what is true and what we wish were true.”

[Terry Plumb · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Delightful Companion for the Universal Journey

By Terry Plumb

“The Rest of Our Lives,” by Judy Goldman, Blair/Carolina Wren Press, 188 pp., $17.95, paperback.
Judy Goldman has always been interested in life’s stages, looking for what she calls “genesis stories,” tales we forge from memory and filter through imagination to better understand how we arrived at the here and now.
In her latest book, “The Rest of Our Lives,” the accomplished memoirist, 83, weaves her tapestry of genesis stories to fashion a frank but reassuring look at life to come.
She writes that as a teenager heading to Myrtle Beach, S.C., she made sure to pack her padded bra. These days, a heating pad is essential gear for any beach vacation. Trip details couldn’t differ more, she writes, but comparing such bookend moments of life reveals that despite the intervening decades -- replete with stories of marriage, children, grandchildren, deaths of loved ones, all the joys and heartbreaks of existence – she’s still the same Judy Kurtz who grew up in a small Southern town known for textile mills and a women’s college.
“Regardless of our age,” she writes, “we’re all still kids, grappling. Trying to find the opening in our uncertainty. The feeling back then, of not being ready for what came next is like this feeling, right now, of not being ready for what comes next.”
Although a memoir of what’s next for octogenarians could be off-putting in this forever-young culture, this book is anything but.
Goldman asked longtime, close friends for thoughts of what life has in store. “There are a lot of things I used to love to do that I don’t want to do anymore,” said one, “but I really miss wanting to do them.”
The author’s fourth memoir is filled with such insights on aging, the loss of friends and relatives, and how to accept the hand life has dealt.
“Mediocrity was never my goal,” she writes, “but as I get closer to the end, I find that perfection is not all it’s cracked up to be.”
“The Rest of Our Lives” may not achieve perfection status, but for anyone old enough to reflect on the universal journey, this book would be a worthy and delightful travel companion.
Terry Plumb is the retired editor of The Herald and lives in Rock Hill, S.C.

[Deirdre · Rating 5 out of 5]

Judy Goldman is an excellent memoirist, and this latest, The Rest of Our Lives, is a reflection on aging, the good parts (are there good parts?) the parts we hate (arm flab) and all the challenges of a long life. She asks her close circle of friends how they feel about it. Her friend, Lew: "If you know the secret to eternal life, don't tell me ..." But mostly she writes about her "genesis stories," her first kiss, how she met her husband, her children, her Breakfast Club, her family history. We all have our genesis stories, she reminds us. Those are the things that weave the fabric of our lives and connect our lives together. She tells so many relatable stories, with both humor and pathos, that the book is like sitting down with a friend. So many of us are worried or afraid of aging, and then it just happens. We remember something from 50 years ago. We think about where we live and what comes next. Judy makes the inevitable journey feel familiar and universal and she does it with humor and care. One of her best bits of advice is on worry. Worry once. When it comes up again, say, "I've already worried about that." I say, buy the book. It's cheaper than therapy.

[Gilda Syverson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Judy Goldman’s memoir, “The Rest of Our Lives,” is not just a book; it’s a heartfelt conversation that resonates with readers of all ages. Her delightful descriptions evoke the essence of life's unexpected moments as pointed out on the back cover of her book, “… turning eighty can be as surprising and baffling as losing your virginity or seeing The Beatles at Shea Stadium."
It’s as if Judy invites us to sit and share a cup of tea with her as she reflects on the later chapters of her life. Insights into the recurring themes and patterns that shape our journeys remind us of the beauty in revisiting our experiences, each time with a fresh perspective. As I immersed myself in Judy’s warm and wise narrative, I found solace and gratitude for the lessons learned through life’s twists and turns. Judy’s poignant storytelling not only illuminates her path but also encourages us to embrace the intricacies of our own lives, fostering acceptance and understanding along the way.

[Lisa Kline · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of Judy Goldman's earlier memoirs, Losing My Sister, struck me to my core. It helped me during a terrible passage in my life. Ever since, I've read every book of hers, for truth-telling about life's stages, but also for her spare, precise writing, with just the perfect details. During one of her presentations, Judy said, "When you write memoir, you must be harder on yourself than on anyone." When Judy does that with her writing, the reader feels such a kinship, because we are all yearning to know we're not alone in our grief, or our impatience, or our perfectionism. In this memoir, Judy's honesty, wisdom, and humor about her youth is so poignant. She, being human, has been through quite a lot. And what she has to say about aging is vibrant, full of life, and feels true. It made me laugh, it made me cry, it made me think about the rest of my life.

[Marjorie Klein · Rating 5 out of 5]

You don’t have to be 80 to relate to Judy Goldman’s latest memoir, just as you didn’t have to have lost a sibling, dealt with a husband’s medical problem, or been raised by a black nanny — all subjects of her previous memoirs. Identifying with Judy’s stories goes beyond the tales she has to tell, to a universality of experience. Each book is woven with those “aha” moments that remind us of our own, and “The Rest of Our Lives” is no exception. She delves into the many layers of growing older with astonishment, acceptance and grace, comparing this phase of life with other milestones we all have experienced. Written with humor and wisdom, it invites us to share Judy’s ride on a sometimes rocky road through life.

[Dave · Rating 5 out of 5]

Heartbreaking, beautiful book that's more than a memoir. Goldman expands on the genre by weaving in memories from all of her 80+ years with questions about aging posed to various friends who are also in the second half of their lives. Their responses add a depth and richness of voice and power.

There is fear and regret and doubt here, but also so much love and hope and wonder that pour from each page.

The book made me think about my own life, and what and who are important to me as I age. And the ending had me sobbing and gasping for air!

[Dee.stribling · Rating 5 out of 5]

Judy Goldman has outdone herself with “The Rest of Our Lives.” I learned long ago to “expect the unexpected” from my mentor and friend - but this book is full of surprises (wow, you did what in NYC?!) But it’s not just her incredible story, or the shared places (ah,The Pad at Ocean Drive Beach…) It’s more about the unexpected emotions, memories, and longing that this book evokes. As always, Judy’s writing is superb, but her story on the way to “the rest of her life” is even better.

[Eileen Joyce-Donovan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Although this is subtitled "a memoir" I felt it was more of an autobiography since it covered a lot of the author's life. She wrote about her college days, life immediately after college, her marriage, her children, her grandchildren and finally her, and her friends, ideas about aging.

Personally, I'm not a fan of memoirs or autobiographies, so my thoughts may be skewed by that fact.

[Susan Hayworth · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. It was heart-warming and real life and so well-written. The author’s writing style flowed so effortlessly and I found the book difficult to put down. It’s a topic that many probably prefer to not dwell on or maybe even discuss, but it’s real life and the author handled it so beautifully.

[Lisa Heinsohn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a quirky read about how no matter how old we the decisions that need to be made at each stage of life never get easier. We arrive at each stage and realize our age doesn’t make us sure of any decisions for the next stage of life.

[Reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another AMAZING book from an AMAZING author!!! It's the next best thing to having a long conversation with Judy. Don't just buy one copy because you're going to want to give it to all your close friends.

[Candy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one hit a little too close to home ...

[Brant Wansley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting musings about getting older and signposts along the way

[Holly Hughes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Her words are magic. Judy knows how to tell a personal story in a way that makes me feel as if I'm part of her family.

[Amber · Rating 2 out of 5]

Really enjoyed Together so I picked this one up as well, definitely a little repetitive but offered some eye opening perspective on aging/ living life.

[Diane · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a lovely, readable memoir! So many things to think about as we age….

[Paulatics · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short and substantive. Just seemingly ordinary things and people who make me proud, make me cry, and give me hope.

[Kay C Field · Rating 5 out of 5]

Aging is a process

This book is a beautiful and inspiring reflection on aging.Each chapter feels like a conversation with someone wise, sharing lessons learned through love, loss and reinvention. It celebrates resilience, humor and joy that comes from experience. Aging, a powerful new chapter - feeling grateful.

[Nancy Stancill · Rating 5 out of 5]

In her new memoir, "The Rest Of Our Lives," Judy Goldman writes in her concluding notes about tackling a book at 80. Did she have the ideas, the time, and the stamina? She needn't have worried. The memoir is crisp, thoughtful and absorbing, even if you're not quite 80. Goldman is a marvel--she has written three previous memoirs: losing her sister to cancer, dealing with her husband's debilitating medical mishap, and most recently, growing up in Rock Hill, SC, with her black nanny. Most memoir writers struggle to produce one good one, but Goldman has managed to come up with four discrete themes. This one focuses not only on physical, mental and emotional declines, but changing views of aging in society. My favorite sections are when she interviews long-standing friends about what aging means to them. She also discusses attitudes about beauty and how to keep a positive attitude about changes in looks. A lovely part discusses her joy at becoming a grandmother. All in all, this is a book to be savored like a fine wine.