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Untangling: How You Can Transform What’s Impossibly Stuck
You know those problems in your life that never change, no matter what you try? What if they are actually where your greatest growth and transformation can be found? It turns out that being stuck is not an endpoint, it's a clue. Wherever there is something in your life that is impossible to think, or feel, or do, you are finding the exact spot where the next steps in your life are waiting to unfold.
Untangling(R), a practice that can enable what is hopelessly stuck to untangle itself, was created by two internationally recognized innovators and teachers in the field of inner awareness. They developed the Untangling method to free themselves from their long-term struggles with depression, writer's block, food, and alcohol. What they discovered was that all these issues were fundamentally the same kind of problem: something they called a Tangle.
Tangles are full of Parts. Parts in turmoil, conflict, confusion and despair. And those Parts are patiently waiting for you to become the inner environment where they can transform. Untangling shows you how to enable your Parts to resolve their conflicts, heal their wounds, and release the qualities they have been safeguarding into your whole self again.
In this remarkably clear and engaging book, interwoven with the authors' own stories, you'll learn:
- What a Tangle is and how it got tangled up in the first place
- Why everything you've tried to change your Tangle doesn't work
- Six Patterns of Impossible Stuckness: Hijack, Takeover, Rebellion, Intimidation, Despair, and Longing
- Five Powers of Presence that enable any Tangle to transform
McGavin and Cornell propose the groundbreaking notion that intractable problems hold within themselves everything that is needed to resolve them. They show how Tangles untangle themselves when approached with an open, curious, compassionate awareness.
Untangling is a compelling new way to think about, relate to, and transform the most stuck problems in life. Based on 30 years of teaching, practice, and exploration, Untangling shows you how to create the environment in which impasse can transform into flow.
Untangling(R), a practice that can enable what is hopelessly stuck to untangle itself, was created by two internationally recognized innovators and teachers in the field of inner awareness. They developed the Untangling method to free themselves from their long-term struggles with depression, writer's block, food, and alcohol. What they discovered was that all these issues were fundamentally the same kind of problem: something they called a Tangle.
Tangles are full of Parts. Parts in turmoil, conflict, confusion and despair. And those Parts are patiently waiting for you to become the inner environment where they can transform. Untangling shows you how to enable your Parts to resolve their conflicts, heal their wounds, and release the qualities they have been safeguarding into your whole self again.
In this remarkably clear and engaging book, interwoven with the authors' own stories, you'll learn:
- What a Tangle is and how it got tangled up in the first place
- Why everything you've tried to change your Tangle doesn't work
- Six Patterns of Impossible Stuckness: Hijack, Takeover, Rebellion, Intimidation, Despair, and Longing
- Five Powers of Presence that enable any Tangle to transform
McGavin and Cornell propose the groundbreaking notion that intractable problems hold within themselves everything that is needed to resolve them. They show how Tangles untangle themselves when approached with an open, curious, compassionate awareness.
Untangling is a compelling new way to think about, relate to, and transform the most stuck problems in life. Based on 30 years of teaching, practice, and exploration, Untangling shows you how to create the environment in which impasse can transform into flow.
349 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 15, 2024
73 people are currently reading
97 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
July 25, 2024
Thank you, Calluna Press, for the advance reading copy.
I am quite pleased with the authors’ narrative of the book. I feel we need more of such books to read and discuss when we as adults inevitably feel too overwhelmed and feel lost and confused.
Read this book to understand such similar behaviours we adults keep on indulging in but would feel guilty later on. Things that we keep repeating despite knowing that we would keep repeating.
Yes, we cannot avoid all these ‘tangles’ but let’s talk about what we can do about it in the long run. Here comes the real deal about this book.
I love how the authors give insightful ways we can make efforts to the common issues we encounter but feel rather awkward to discuss with friends and family.
And yes, we need such books more and more despite the popular older ones on similar topics. Because no one book will help everyone equally.
Please keep in mind that the book discusses on eating disorder, alcohol addiction and mental health issues.
I am quite pleased with the authors’ narrative of the book. I feel we need more of such books to read and discuss when we as adults inevitably feel too overwhelmed and feel lost and confused.
Read this book to understand such similar behaviours we adults keep on indulging in but would feel guilty later on. Things that we keep repeating despite knowing that we would keep repeating.
Yes, we cannot avoid all these ‘tangles’ but let’s talk about what we can do about it in the long run. Here comes the real deal about this book.
I love how the authors give insightful ways we can make efforts to the common issues we encounter but feel rather awkward to discuss with friends and family.
And yes, we need such books more and more despite the popular older ones on similar topics. Because no one book will help everyone equally.
Please keep in mind that the book discusses on eating disorder, alcohol addiction and mental health issues.
August 18, 2024
This self-help book describes a method that can assist you in dealing with personal issues and difficulties we all experience in our lives, such as anxiety, self-criticism, which can lead to issues such as overeating, abuse of alcoholism, depression. The book describes tools and strategies that can help to deal with our inner blocking that keeps us stuck.
I enjoyed this book which I read by audio, read by the two authors. It is insightful and compassionate. The authors use their personal experiences along with their study, research to describe the methods. I appreciated the pace and also how well the narration of the book was provided. I found it very interesting, and also believe that the methods were useful and that I will be able to use some of these going forward. I recommend this book to anyone who wishes to reshape their "stuckness."
I enjoyed this book which I read by audio, read by the two authors. It is insightful and compassionate. The authors use their personal experiences along with their study, research to describe the methods. I appreciated the pace and also how well the narration of the book was provided. I found it very interesting, and also believe that the methods were useful and that I will be able to use some of these going forward. I recommend this book to anyone who wishes to reshape their "stuckness."
October 3, 2024
Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for this eARC in audiobook format.
Untangling: How You Can Transform What’s Impossibly Stuck by Barbara McGavin and Ann Weiser Cornell, narrated by the authors themselves, is a profound and enlightening audiobook that offers a fresh perspective on dealing with life’s most stubborn problems. This self-help guide introduces the innovative Untangling® method, a practice designed to help individuals transform seemingly intractable issues into opportunities for growth and healing.
McGavin and Cornell, both seasoned experts in the field of inner awareness, bring their extensive experience and personal stories to the forefront, making the content relatable and engaging. Their narration adds a personal touch, as they guide listeners through the concepts and techniques with clarity and compassion. The authors’ voices are soothing and reassuring, enhancing the overall listening experience and making complex ideas more accessible.
The core of the book revolves around the concept of “Tangles,” which are described as internal conflicts and emotional knots that keep us stuck. McGavin and Cornell explain how these Tangles form and why traditional methods often fail to resolve them. They introduce six patterns of stuckness—Hijack, Takeover, Rebellion, Intimidation, Despair, and Longing—and provide practical tools to address each one. The authors emphasize the importance of approaching these Tangles with an open, curious, and compassionate mindset, which is key to facilitating transformation.
A stellar feature of this audiobook is its actionable advice. The authors provide step-by-step instructions and exercises that listeners can implement immediately. These practical tools are designed to help individuals create an inner environment conducive to healing and growth. The book’s structure, with its clear explanations and real-life examples, makes it easy to follow and apply the techniques in everyday life.
Untangling is a journey towards self-discovery and empowerment. McGavin and Cornell’s approach is both innovative and deeply humane, offering a new way to think about and relate to our most challenging problems.
Untangling: How You Can Transform What’s Impossibly Stuck by Barbara McGavin and Ann Weiser Cornell, narrated by the authors themselves, is a profound and enlightening audiobook that offers a fresh perspective on dealing with life’s most stubborn problems. This self-help guide introduces the innovative Untangling® method, a practice designed to help individuals transform seemingly intractable issues into opportunities for growth and healing.
McGavin and Cornell, both seasoned experts in the field of inner awareness, bring their extensive experience and personal stories to the forefront, making the content relatable and engaging. Their narration adds a personal touch, as they guide listeners through the concepts and techniques with clarity and compassion. The authors’ voices are soothing and reassuring, enhancing the overall listening experience and making complex ideas more accessible.
The core of the book revolves around the concept of “Tangles,” which are described as internal conflicts and emotional knots that keep us stuck. McGavin and Cornell explain how these Tangles form and why traditional methods often fail to resolve them. They introduce six patterns of stuckness—Hijack, Takeover, Rebellion, Intimidation, Despair, and Longing—and provide practical tools to address each one. The authors emphasize the importance of approaching these Tangles with an open, curious, and compassionate mindset, which is key to facilitating transformation.
A stellar feature of this audiobook is its actionable advice. The authors provide step-by-step instructions and exercises that listeners can implement immediately. These practical tools are designed to help individuals create an inner environment conducive to healing and growth. The book’s structure, with its clear explanations and real-life examples, makes it easy to follow and apply the techniques in everyday life.
Untangling is a journey towards self-discovery and empowerment. McGavin and Cornell’s approach is both innovative and deeply humane, offering a new way to think about and relate to our most challenging problems.
July 10, 2025
Brilliant -just like all their previous works.
Untangling is a powerful method of transformation -the most powerful I know of, actually, being a psychologist and having dedicated years and years to experimenting and researching cutting-edge embodied techniques for well-being or complex trauma. It’s especially applied to “tangles” that is the toughest issues in our lives, the ones we are stuck with, lost in a sort of maze with no exit.
*Please notice*
Make sure you know Focusing before embarking on this journey!!
Untangling is not like other self-help books. It doesn’t offer advice or quick solutions. It needs you to be able to bring a special attention to the “Tangle”. On one hand, there’s the attention of Self-in-Presence, which basically anyone can learn, regardless of their knowledge of Focusing.
On the other hand, there’s the process of Felt Sensing which remains at the heart of the book.
Felt Sensing, commonly known as Focusing, was developed by the philosopher and psychotherapist Eugene Gendlin, based on his observations and research on what actually works in therapy vs what does not work. Ann Weiser Cornell was his colleague and is still one of the most widely known Focusing teachers and authors in the world, having built on Gendlin’s method, expanded it and revolutionised it with her unique teaching method, together with Barbara McGavin.
So if you want to learn Untangling..
start learning Focusing!!
Then come back to this. It will be worth it!!!
Untangling is a powerful method of transformation -the most powerful I know of, actually, being a psychologist and having dedicated years and years to experimenting and researching cutting-edge embodied techniques for well-being or complex trauma. It’s especially applied to “tangles” that is the toughest issues in our lives, the ones we are stuck with, lost in a sort of maze with no exit.
*Please notice*
Make sure you know Focusing before embarking on this journey!!
Untangling is not like other self-help books. It doesn’t offer advice or quick solutions. It needs you to be able to bring a special attention to the “Tangle”. On one hand, there’s the attention of Self-in-Presence, which basically anyone can learn, regardless of their knowledge of Focusing.
On the other hand, there’s the process of Felt Sensing which remains at the heart of the book.
Felt Sensing, commonly known as Focusing, was developed by the philosopher and psychotherapist Eugene Gendlin, based on his observations and research on what actually works in therapy vs what does not work. Ann Weiser Cornell was his colleague and is still one of the most widely known Focusing teachers and authors in the world, having built on Gendlin’s method, expanded it and revolutionised it with her unique teaching method, together with Barbara McGavin.
So if you want to learn Untangling..
start learning Focusing!!
Then come back to this. It will be worth it!!!
September 9, 2024
This was a very interesting and useful book and I am grateful to have received it in order to share my view on it.
It presents a therapeutic way of looking and sitting with a situation, and it describes the whole process of doing it and various aspects about it.
Whether you have been exposed to therapy or you are not familiar with any kind, this book offers an interesting practice that is harbored in presence and empathy, so it's a tender, caring practice.
There are two things that I really appreciate about this book: first is the very large palette of situations that this practice can be applied to. There are so many situations, so diverse, all explained in depth and solved with this.
The second thing I liked a lot was the level of vulnerability the authors offer, and in doing so provide many of the examples. The authors are simply living this practice which makes it so much more valuable and authentic. And so impactful, the examples feature small, mundane things, but also deep, big things like addictions or truly, ways of seeing life that may be not beneficial.
Overall, I feel this book is a gift, this practice is a very useful tool that I started practicing. And I myself will gift this book to my dear ones because I find it truly valuable.
It presents a therapeutic way of looking and sitting with a situation, and it describes the whole process of doing it and various aspects about it.
Whether you have been exposed to therapy or you are not familiar with any kind, this book offers an interesting practice that is harbored in presence and empathy, so it's a tender, caring practice.
There are two things that I really appreciate about this book: first is the very large palette of situations that this practice can be applied to. There are so many situations, so diverse, all explained in depth and solved with this.
The second thing I liked a lot was the level of vulnerability the authors offer, and in doing so provide many of the examples. The authors are simply living this practice which makes it so much more valuable and authentic. And so impactful, the examples feature small, mundane things, but also deep, big things like addictions or truly, ways of seeing life that may be not beneficial.
Overall, I feel this book is a gift, this practice is a very useful tool that I started practicing. And I myself will gift this book to my dear ones because I find it truly valuable.
May 24, 2025
One more reading in the path to, maybe, become a therapist.
Very related to IFS and meditation. I think this method could help people who have to harmonize different voices from cacophony and paralysis into recovered life flow. One more perspective, one more way to tell the story of meaning and flourishing. When my kids were little I taught fractions in their class, I remember having to explain it in many different ways before the “aha” moment appeared in the kid’s faces. I think our theories of how our psyche works are different stories and each one can reach different people and be healing. This one, I thought, takes the idea of different “parts” from the traumatic formation of multiple personalities affirming that it applies to all of us, if in a less acute way. Very similar to IFS but with interesting twists when it comes to life impasses. Thinking about it, not that different than the “parts” Freud argued, since two of the main parts are: the one fighting for freedom and the one trying to make us comply with society-alas, nothing is new under the sun! I liked the blend with focussing (which sounds like mindfulness to me). I’ll probably check out the guy who came up with focussing. The fact that neither of the author’s is a therapist gives me a little bit of pause.
Very related to IFS and meditation. I think this method could help people who have to harmonize different voices from cacophony and paralysis into recovered life flow. One more perspective, one more way to tell the story of meaning and flourishing. When my kids were little I taught fractions in their class, I remember having to explain it in many different ways before the “aha” moment appeared in the kid’s faces. I think our theories of how our psyche works are different stories and each one can reach different people and be healing. This one, I thought, takes the idea of different “parts” from the traumatic formation of multiple personalities affirming that it applies to all of us, if in a less acute way. Very similar to IFS but with interesting twists when it comes to life impasses. Thinking about it, not that different than the “parts” Freud argued, since two of the main parts are: the one fighting for freedom and the one trying to make us comply with society-alas, nothing is new under the sun! I liked the blend with focussing (which sounds like mindfulness to me). I’ll probably check out the guy who came up with focussing. The fact that neither of the author’s is a therapist gives me a little bit of pause.
July 23, 2024
This is a good audiobook on addressing issues in a direct but considerate way.
It was excellently narrated by the authors, and I look forward to dipping in and out of it. It's nothing groundbreaking, in my opinion, but it's worth a listen.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publishers for the ALC.
It was excellently narrated by the authors, and I look forward to dipping in and out of it. It's nothing groundbreaking, in my opinion, but it's worth a listen.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publishers for the ALC.
November 15, 2024
Excellent but full, need to read again.
December 18, 2024
If you’re interested in books where you work through your past trauma, heal your inner child, or get productive in areas that you historically cannot be productive, this is a good read to add to your list. The tone is quite different from psychology self-help books and productivity books. While books in this arena often lean more towards being rigid or berating, this book has a gentle, guiding voice throughout that invites you into curiosity about your own stuck-ness without forcing you to address it if you’re not ready.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews