What do you think?
Rate this book
A Change of Habit: Leaving Behind My Husband, Career, and Everything I Owned to Become a Nun
The soulful, hilarious memoir of a chronic people pleaser who surprised everyone in her life by abandoning an unfulfilling career and marriage to join a convent—and learned how much we stand to gain when we fully embrace our authentic selves
In her twenties and thirties, Monica Clare was a talented but exhausted photo editor who spent her days getting yelled at by clients who were often strung out on cocaine and megalomania. For years, the voice calling her to a simpler, quieter life had been getting louder. As a little kid, she’d seen Audrey Hepburn in The Nun’s Story and thought: That’s me. That’s how she found herself straightening her habit nervously as she walked into a convent, preparing to live alongside eleven other sisters who’d taken the same vow of poverty and celibacy . . . indefinitely. Could a chronically fidgety, pop culture–obsessed woman of the world ever fit in? she wondered. And why did the other nuns seem so cold and disapproving?
As the months went on, she realized the other nuns were shy, not unfriendly—much like herself. The culture at the convent discouraged giving compliments or even saying “please” or “thank you,” since acts of generosity were to be freely given and received. But when Monica rose to the role of Sister Superior, she got the policy against compliments changed. Relationships started to blossom, first awkwardly and then more easily. Who would have predicted that Sister Christina, the one she thought had deeply disliked her from the start, would turn out to be a huge hugger? Or that they’d spend entire afternoons trying to keep a wild turkey from running amok in their community garden?
Equal parts tell-all and rallying cry, A Change of Habit reveals how much we can say yes to when we stop laboring to prove our worth to ourselves and others. In her role as a spiritual counselor, Sister Monica guides people from all walks of life toward resisting the false promises of capitalism, finding healing in small acts of nurture and connection, and ultimately, restoring themselves to a place of wholeness, all while living in this gorgeously messy world of ours.
In her twenties and thirties, Monica Clare was a talented but exhausted photo editor who spent her days getting yelled at by clients who were often strung out on cocaine and megalomania. For years, the voice calling her to a simpler, quieter life had been getting louder. As a little kid, she’d seen Audrey Hepburn in The Nun’s Story and thought: That’s me. That’s how she found herself straightening her habit nervously as she walked into a convent, preparing to live alongside eleven other sisters who’d taken the same vow of poverty and celibacy . . . indefinitely. Could a chronically fidgety, pop culture–obsessed woman of the world ever fit in? she wondered. And why did the other nuns seem so cold and disapproving?
As the months went on, she realized the other nuns were shy, not unfriendly—much like herself. The culture at the convent discouraged giving compliments or even saying “please” or “thank you,” since acts of generosity were to be freely given and received. But when Monica rose to the role of Sister Superior, she got the policy against compliments changed. Relationships started to blossom, first awkwardly and then more easily. Who would have predicted that Sister Christina, the one she thought had deeply disliked her from the start, would turn out to be a huge hugger? Or that they’d spend entire afternoons trying to keep a wild turkey from running amok in their community garden?
Equal parts tell-all and rallying cry, A Change of Habit reveals how much we can say yes to when we stop laboring to prove our worth to ourselves and others. In her role as a spiritual counselor, Sister Monica guides people from all walks of life toward resisting the false promises of capitalism, finding healing in small acts of nurture and connection, and ultimately, restoring themselves to a place of wholeness, all while living in this gorgeously messy world of ours.
316 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 29, 2025
222 people are currently reading
5027 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 204 reviews
March 20, 2025
This is a wonderful memoir of a woman that gave up everything to become a nun. At a very young age, she had thoughts of becoming a nun and was fascinated by the movie, “The Nun’s Story”. She grew up in a very difficult lifestyle, where she had experienced violence in her home. Her and her Family moved a lot when she was a child, finding it hard to figure out where she fits in. As she grew older, she still struggled of where to fit in. Although she felt like it was tough to fit in, she always made people laugh!
Her journey as she navigates through life to finding her true self is inspiring. I would not become a nun myself. However, I do feel that finding your true happiness and identity is important in life and that is what this book represents. She ends up getting Married and Divorced, which ends up freeing Sister Monica Clare! I enjoyed the pictures that were shared throughout the book, her vulnerability in writing this book, and her happiness and laughter she shared with the world in writing this book! It is unique and kept my interest while reading it! I give this memoir a 4 out of 5 stars!
Thank you to NetGalley, author Sister Monica Clare, and Crown publishing for this digital advanced reader’s copy of this book in exchange for my honest review!
This memoir is set to be published on April 29, 2025!
Her journey as she navigates through life to finding her true self is inspiring. I would not become a nun myself. However, I do feel that finding your true happiness and identity is important in life and that is what this book represents. She ends up getting Married and Divorced, which ends up freeing Sister Monica Clare! I enjoyed the pictures that were shared throughout the book, her vulnerability in writing this book, and her happiness and laughter she shared with the world in writing this book! It is unique and kept my interest while reading it! I give this memoir a 4 out of 5 stars!
Thank you to NetGalley, author Sister Monica Clare, and Crown publishing for this digital advanced reader’s copy of this book in exchange for my honest review!
This memoir is set to be published on April 29, 2025!
March 1, 2025
This is a memoir from an Episcopalian nun on the brink of becoming a priest, currently Superior at her convent in Mendham, NJ. She had a very difficult childhood marked by domestic violence. She was drawn to the book "The Nun's Story" as a child (of which a movie had been made starring Audrey Hepburn) and the idea of becoming a nun. She dabbled in acting and became part of The Groundlings improv group circle that harvested cast members for Saturday Night Live, becoming especially close with actress Cheri Oteri of SNL fame. She also was married and divorced, making a living as a photo editor in LA, and even performed as part of an acoustic rock duo.
I loved the way the sister shared how peaceful, right, and at home she felt in the convent environment, but so aptly described the challenges of being fully accepted into the order, with all its rules, customs, and silence. It was a revelation to learn that you must settle all your financial debts in order to become a part of this religious order. I appreciated the personal photos interspersed throughout the book from all stages of her life. This was certainly a full-bodied and inspirational account of a very interesting life.
Thank you to Crown Publishing who provided an advance reader copy via NetGalley.
I loved the way the sister shared how peaceful, right, and at home she felt in the convent environment, but so aptly described the challenges of being fully accepted into the order, with all its rules, customs, and silence. It was a revelation to learn that you must settle all your financial debts in order to become a part of this religious order. I appreciated the personal photos interspersed throughout the book from all stages of her life. This was certainly a full-bodied and inspirational account of a very interesting life.
Thank you to Crown Publishing who provided an advance reader copy via NetGalley.
December 22, 2024
I received a free copy of, A Change of Habit, by Sister Monica Clare, from the publisher and Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Monica Clare did not become a nun, until she was in her thirties, but she felt drawn to being a nun, since she was a child. I thought this was an ok, read, I did not connect with Sister Monica Clare at all.
June 25, 2025
A Change of Habit, subtitled “Leaving Behind My Husband, Career, and Everything I Owned to Become a Nun” is Sister Monica Clare’s story of pursuing life as a nun.
I’m not a super religious person but from time to time, find myself drawn to religious stories, maybe because they’re so different from my own experience, A Change of Habit being one example.
I found the book to have a bit of slower start getting to the heart of the story. I understand Sister Monica Clare sharing her background and upbringing, explaining how “then” became “now”. She didn’t have an easy childhood and after college at NYU, performed comedy, worked in advertising in L.A., and was married. While Monica did everything she felt she was supposed to do, she was not fulfilled and continued to feel the pull and a calling to life as a nun.
At age 46, Monica decided to pursue this, which was not without challenges. She had to clear her financial debt and abide by numerous rules of the convent, which took time. I enjoyed hearing about her transition and acclimation to this type of life, and the adventures she’s experienced as a nun, committing to a life of prayer, service, and spiritual development while resisting capitalism. Today, she is a nun at Community of St. John Baptist, an Episcopal convent based in New Jersey.
As cliche as it may sound, A Change of Habit is a real life reminder that it’s not too late to pursue our dreams. I appreciated the inside look at such a different life and admire Sister Monica Clare for following her calling.
I’m not a super religious person but from time to time, find myself drawn to religious stories, maybe because they’re so different from my own experience, A Change of Habit being one example.
I found the book to have a bit of slower start getting to the heart of the story. I understand Sister Monica Clare sharing her background and upbringing, explaining how “then” became “now”. She didn’t have an easy childhood and after college at NYU, performed comedy, worked in advertising in L.A., and was married. While Monica did everything she felt she was supposed to do, she was not fulfilled and continued to feel the pull and a calling to life as a nun.
At age 46, Monica decided to pursue this, which was not without challenges. She had to clear her financial debt and abide by numerous rules of the convent, which took time. I enjoyed hearing about her transition and acclimation to this type of life, and the adventures she’s experienced as a nun, committing to a life of prayer, service, and spiritual development while resisting capitalism. Today, she is a nun at Community of St. John Baptist, an Episcopal convent based in New Jersey.
As cliche as it may sound, A Change of Habit is a real life reminder that it’s not too late to pursue our dreams. I appreciated the inside look at such a different life and admire Sister Monica Clare for following her calling.
June 25, 2025
Sister Monica Clare (born Claudette Monica Powell in 1966) is an American Episcopalian nun. I listened to her audiobook narration of her 2025 memoir A Change of Habit, where she recounts her fascinating life story so far in a way that reflects substantial courage and personal growth. She was born into a Southern Baptist family in Georgia and experienced a turbulent childhood that would score unfortunately high on the adverse childhood experiences (ACE) inventory, worked for years in New York and later Los Angeles in the entertainment industry and stand-up comedy scene (lots of '90s SNL and MadTV stars are name-dropped), and was married briefly. Throughout her life, she felt a calling to be a religious sister, initially envisioning herself as a Catholic nun, but realizing through exploration that her socially progressive views more closely aligned with Episcopalianism. Once her marriage ended in her mid-30s, she finally felt ready to pursue nunhood, which was much harder than she anticipated - paying off her substantial consumer debt, going through a years-long evaluation and initiation process, and adapting to a very different lifestyle and communication style. Sister Monica Clare is currently studying to become a priest (apparently, being both a priest and a nun is possible in Episcopalianism) and has a large social media following on Instagram and TikTok.
I appreciated Sister Monica Clare's honesty and vulnerability in this book, especially in sharing how once she achieved her dream of being accepted as an initiate into her convent, her path continued to be challenging and unexpected - this runs counter to the tidy narrative of goal fulfillment I often read in memoirs that brushes all the messiness under the rug.
My statistics:
Book 191 for 2025
Book 2117 cumulatively
I appreciated Sister Monica Clare's honesty and vulnerability in this book, especially in sharing how once she achieved her dream of being accepted as an initiate into her convent, her path continued to be challenging and unexpected - this runs counter to the tidy narrative of goal fulfillment I often read in memoirs that brushes all the messiness under the rug.
My statistics:
Book 191 for 2025
Book 2117 cumulatively
December 22, 2024
There are times when you sit down with a book that you enter a world of discovery.
You discover a new author you love.
You discover a story with which you connect.
You discover a world that is simultaneously different than yours yet also feels somehow related to your own life experiences.
This has happened more than once to me, perhaps because I'm prone to immersing myself in stories and surrendering to an author's will. I'm a kinder and gentler reader and reviewer, someone who looks for the good and quite often finds it.
I am not not will I ever likely be a nun. I do not live in an intentional community of any sort nor can I particularly identify with having a fast-paced, high-powered career of any type from which to escape. In some ways, I am nothing like the Sister Monica Clare whose story is found in the pages of "A Change of Habit: Leaving Behind My Husband, Career, and Everything I owned to Become a Nun."
Yet, so immersed did I become in her story that even though her name change doesn't surface until around 2/3 into the book that as I sit here writing I can't for the life of me remember her birth name).
That's a good thing.
Now then, to acknowledge that I do have some common ground with Sister Monica from traumatic, unstable childhoods to a seeming inability to function normally in relationships because there was always something else. I identify with that sense of feeling unsatisfied no matter how satisfied I've become.
"A Change of Habit" is both a simple and remarkable story. It's a story of a woman who knew as a young girl she was called into a spiritual life yet spent many years trying but struggling to live into the expectations of those around her and a culture that has never quite understood the religious life. It is a memoir, of this have no doubt, but it is also a glimpse inside the normalcy of human beings who dedicate themselves to live authentically a life into which few feel called and even fewer respond to that call.
Sister Monica writes beautifully throughout "A Change of Habit" about the feelings that constantly followed her throughout a career that paid the bills but was woefully unsatisfying and a marriage that we all could see, and she could see, was never meant to be. She also writes about the consequences of following a life that one's not called into as she struggled with resolving the debts that could keep her from entering into her religious community and emotionally struggled to surrender to a world where she no longer needed to prove her worth to simply "be."
"A Change of Habit" doesn't romanticize the religious life. In fact, it's portrayed quite realistically from personality foibles to strict rules to the inherent risks of vulnerably serving others who are, in some cases incapable emotionally or physically of knowing how to respond to that care. Yet, along the way we began to deeply appreciate Sister Monica as she moves away from her pop-culture obsessed life into a world where even simple actions like saying "please" and "thank you" can draw admonishment and the more stoic life can make it seem like those around you wish you were gone.
I am seemingly not the target reader for "A Change of Habit." I'm a paraplegic/double amputee born with spina bifida who survived cancer twice in the past year. I'm in my 50s having survived much longer than anyone expected. I work on the management team for a large government agency and am in many ways a world away from the world created in "A Change of Habit." I was raised in what I would now call a cult or close to it (Jehovah's Witnesses) and have spent most of my life trying to undo the damage from being booted from two churches, one because they believed I was gay and one because of a suicide attempt (which was true).
And yet, I am the target reader for "A Change of Habit." I have long believed that I've survived this long because of my faith. I survived childhood traumas, including sexual abuse, because of my childhood faith. I survived the suicide of my wife and death of our newborn because of my faith. I have long felt called into ministry, at times leaning into it with roles in pastoral care, interim ministry, children's ministry, and pulpit fill, but I've never surrendered to it partly because of a body that never cooperates and partly because of the "otherness" created from a lifetime of trauma.
I am, at least in my eyes, a failed seminarian (I graduated, but not with the MDiv that I desired) and I have long questioned if I belong anywhere. Yet, I'm also a longtime activist who has traveled over 6,000 miles in my wheelchair supporting non-profits and I often say that I'm happiest living life at 2-3 miles per hour.
Indeed, I must say that by the end of "A Change of Habit" I felt a certain kinship with the world created by Sister Monica and the ways that she has influenced it especially since growing into the role of Sister Superior. "A Change of Habit," at least for me, planted seeds of appreciation for the world I do live in, messy yet glorious. It helped me recognize gratitude for the life I do live and the ministry I do have even if it's not the ministry I pictured myself having. It helped me appreciate those who give themselves to a deeper spiritual life and who turn away from capitalism, a desire for authority, a desire for power, and other things taught by a society often more focused on "I" than we or than on God.
At times remarkable in its vulnerability and other times quite funny, "A Change of Habit" is a lot things - a wonderful memoir, a powerful spiritual guide, a reminder of the glorious gifts of women in our faith communities, and a gentle nudge for all of us to lean into our authentic selves.
You discover a new author you love.
You discover a story with which you connect.
You discover a world that is simultaneously different than yours yet also feels somehow related to your own life experiences.
This has happened more than once to me, perhaps because I'm prone to immersing myself in stories and surrendering to an author's will. I'm a kinder and gentler reader and reviewer, someone who looks for the good and quite often finds it.
I am not not will I ever likely be a nun. I do not live in an intentional community of any sort nor can I particularly identify with having a fast-paced, high-powered career of any type from which to escape. In some ways, I am nothing like the Sister Monica Clare whose story is found in the pages of "A Change of Habit: Leaving Behind My Husband, Career, and Everything I owned to Become a Nun."
Yet, so immersed did I become in her story that even though her name change doesn't surface until around 2/3 into the book that as I sit here writing I can't for the life of me remember her birth name).
That's a good thing.
Now then, to acknowledge that I do have some common ground with Sister Monica from traumatic, unstable childhoods to a seeming inability to function normally in relationships because there was always something else. I identify with that sense of feeling unsatisfied no matter how satisfied I've become.
"A Change of Habit" is both a simple and remarkable story. It's a story of a woman who knew as a young girl she was called into a spiritual life yet spent many years trying but struggling to live into the expectations of those around her and a culture that has never quite understood the religious life. It is a memoir, of this have no doubt, but it is also a glimpse inside the normalcy of human beings who dedicate themselves to live authentically a life into which few feel called and even fewer respond to that call.
Sister Monica writes beautifully throughout "A Change of Habit" about the feelings that constantly followed her throughout a career that paid the bills but was woefully unsatisfying and a marriage that we all could see, and she could see, was never meant to be. She also writes about the consequences of following a life that one's not called into as she struggled with resolving the debts that could keep her from entering into her religious community and emotionally struggled to surrender to a world where she no longer needed to prove her worth to simply "be."
"A Change of Habit" doesn't romanticize the religious life. In fact, it's portrayed quite realistically from personality foibles to strict rules to the inherent risks of vulnerably serving others who are, in some cases incapable emotionally or physically of knowing how to respond to that care. Yet, along the way we began to deeply appreciate Sister Monica as she moves away from her pop-culture obsessed life into a world where even simple actions like saying "please" and "thank you" can draw admonishment and the more stoic life can make it seem like those around you wish you were gone.
I am seemingly not the target reader for "A Change of Habit." I'm a paraplegic/double amputee born with spina bifida who survived cancer twice in the past year. I'm in my 50s having survived much longer than anyone expected. I work on the management team for a large government agency and am in many ways a world away from the world created in "A Change of Habit." I was raised in what I would now call a cult or close to it (Jehovah's Witnesses) and have spent most of my life trying to undo the damage from being booted from two churches, one because they believed I was gay and one because of a suicide attempt (which was true).
And yet, I am the target reader for "A Change of Habit." I have long believed that I've survived this long because of my faith. I survived childhood traumas, including sexual abuse, because of my childhood faith. I survived the suicide of my wife and death of our newborn because of my faith. I have long felt called into ministry, at times leaning into it with roles in pastoral care, interim ministry, children's ministry, and pulpit fill, but I've never surrendered to it partly because of a body that never cooperates and partly because of the "otherness" created from a lifetime of trauma.
I am, at least in my eyes, a failed seminarian (I graduated, but not with the MDiv that I desired) and I have long questioned if I belong anywhere. Yet, I'm also a longtime activist who has traveled over 6,000 miles in my wheelchair supporting non-profits and I often say that I'm happiest living life at 2-3 miles per hour.
Indeed, I must say that by the end of "A Change of Habit" I felt a certain kinship with the world created by Sister Monica and the ways that she has influenced it especially since growing into the role of Sister Superior. "A Change of Habit," at least for me, planted seeds of appreciation for the world I do live in, messy yet glorious. It helped me recognize gratitude for the life I do live and the ministry I do have even if it's not the ministry I pictured myself having. It helped me appreciate those who give themselves to a deeper spiritual life and who turn away from capitalism, a desire for authority, a desire for power, and other things taught by a society often more focused on "I" than we or than on God.
At times remarkable in its vulnerability and other times quite funny, "A Change of Habit" is a lot things - a wonderful memoir, a powerful spiritual guide, a reminder of the glorious gifts of women in our faith communities, and a gentle nudge for all of us to lean into our authentic selves.
July 23, 2025
Such an amazing story, I will always and forever be a sucker for the stories of nuns.
While this story might feel a little disorganized and random at times, I think that helps it feel more authentic, like Sister Monica Clare is telling you her story over a cup of coffee.
Also loveeeee stories than humanize nuns! They have fears, dreams, and problems just like the rest of us do.
While this story might feel a little disorganized and random at times, I think that helps it feel more authentic, like Sister Monica Clare is telling you her story over a cup of coffee.
Also loveeeee stories than humanize nuns! They have fears, dreams, and problems just like the rest of us do.
June 23, 2025
A fresh and very enjoyable book, such a breeze to read. A very compelling story of the author’s life as well as her quest to become an Episcopal nun and a Priest. She��s had quite a lifetime so far.
One thing that I cannot get out of my head is the time she went to Jimmy Fallon’s birthday party with Cheri Oteri and how badly she was treated by everyone there. What a complete jerk Fallon was.
There is so much more to the book than that…
If marketed right, I think it could be a best seller no doubt.
Thanks to Crown Books for the Advance Uncorrected Proof of the book
One thing that I cannot get out of my head is the time she went to Jimmy Fallon’s birthday party with Cheri Oteri and how badly she was treated by everyone there. What a complete jerk Fallon was.
There is so much more to the book than that…
If marketed right, I think it could be a best seller no doubt.
Thanks to Crown Books for the Advance Uncorrected Proof of the book
April 16, 2025
In this memoir, Sister Monica Clare shares her story of going from career and married life to becoming a nun. After many years of trying to find her place in career and then in a marriage that ended due to her husband’s affairs and addiction, God drew her back to the calling to become a nun that she sensed from an early age.
“. . . a sense of peace washed over me. Here was a world where everyone belonged, where your worth wasn't determined by the neighborhood you lived in or the clothes you wore. I longed for that certainty, that sense of home.”
The book might seem to have a slow start for some, but as I read, the backstory solidified the rest. She details her struggle with people pleasing and then conquers it in many ways as she chooses God’s leading instead. She discovers much about human nature in community and is inspired to influence convent life in ways that depict the love of God.
Though I don’t concur fully with her beliefs, I found this memoir to be incredibly inspiring as I read about Sister Monica’s journey to and within convent life.
Highlights:
“You didn’t fail. You tried it and it wasn't for you. So you moved on to something else, because God was showing you that that wasn't for you. It wasn't wasted time. Failures are stepping stones. They are God teaching you something.”
“I have to stop doing what others want and start doing what God wants.”
“. . . the idea that any of us is supposed to present some pretty, cleaned up version of ourselves is dangerous. Of all places, convents, monasteries, and churches should invite us to be our most authentic selves.”
“. . . you can go way off the rails spiritually and forget about God and not spend enough time with God, and neglect your prayer life, and God is in that chapel waiting for you to come back. Missing you. Loving you. Always wanting to be with you.”
“The issues that you have out there follow you into monastic life. The same characters are going to show up—the bully and the user; the same mental health issues will arise—the anxiety and depression. You think you’re going to close the door and they’re going to go away but they don’t, they intensify, and you must learn to deal with them.”
Total: 4.25
Readability: 5
Impact: 4
Content: 4
Enjoyment: 4
Thank you to Crown Publishing for gifting me an advanced reader copy of this book. I am leaving this review voluntarily and was not required to leave a positive review. All opinions are my own.
“. . . a sense of peace washed over me. Here was a world where everyone belonged, where your worth wasn't determined by the neighborhood you lived in or the clothes you wore. I longed for that certainty, that sense of home.”
The book might seem to have a slow start for some, but as I read, the backstory solidified the rest. She details her struggle with people pleasing and then conquers it in many ways as she chooses God’s leading instead. She discovers much about human nature in community and is inspired to influence convent life in ways that depict the love of God.
Though I don’t concur fully with her beliefs, I found this memoir to be incredibly inspiring as I read about Sister Monica’s journey to and within convent life.
Highlights:
“You didn’t fail. You tried it and it wasn't for you. So you moved on to something else, because God was showing you that that wasn't for you. It wasn't wasted time. Failures are stepping stones. They are God teaching you something.”
“I have to stop doing what others want and start doing what God wants.”
“. . . the idea that any of us is supposed to present some pretty, cleaned up version of ourselves is dangerous. Of all places, convents, monasteries, and churches should invite us to be our most authentic selves.”
“. . . you can go way off the rails spiritually and forget about God and not spend enough time with God, and neglect your prayer life, and God is in that chapel waiting for you to come back. Missing you. Loving you. Always wanting to be with you.”
“The issues that you have out there follow you into monastic life. The same characters are going to show up—the bully and the user; the same mental health issues will arise—the anxiety and depression. You think you’re going to close the door and they’re going to go away but they don’t, they intensify, and you must learn to deal with them.”
Total: 4.25
Readability: 5
Impact: 4
Content: 4
Enjoyment: 4
Thank you to Crown Publishing for gifting me an advanced reader copy of this book. I am leaving this review voluntarily and was not required to leave a positive review. All opinions are my own.
January 29, 2025
An interesting read. Meet Claudette, who from the age of five wanted to be a nun. We watch her grow, from a young child, experiencing an atrocious childhood, to a forty something adult, becoming a 'religious' in the episcopal church. Claudette, who became Sister Monica Clare, has little self-esteem, feels very unloved and is a mess of nerves slowly becomes something more once she enters the sisterhood.
June 1, 2025
True, relentless devotion, being in service of something greater than yourself, helping those in need, support within a community, commitment, no men allowed (except for HIM lol), routine- this memoir was SELLING becoming a nun to me, even though that wasn’t the intention. I really liked reading about the author’s journey from being an abused, neglected child who always felt a connection to God but suppressed it, to going through challenge after challenge and eventually accepting her calling and becoming a nun. You’re just rooting for her the entire time.
July 4, 2025
10/10 memoir! Now y'all have to worry about me becoming an Episcopal nun...
August 17, 2025
This was just a lovely book. I didn’t know what to expect but I thoroughly enjoyed it. I would def say nunnery is not for me but some of the messages I really liked. To quote Sister Monica Clare, “god has given me this lesson that I could still be imperfect and be loved… we humans are terrible at loving one another. We’re terrible at keeping peace…” It’s a very nice and true sentiment.
November 23, 2025
I just find nuns so fascinating and cool! I love the way God lit her path through the years.
October 21, 2025
Fascinating life story that is marred by wrong-headed thinking and a lost-soul center to the text. It's almost shocking that this woman claims to be a person following God. Her concept of believing in a higher power doesn't match with the foundations of Christianity, and the author misuses common Christian concepts in a way that a typical leftist liberal would.
The book's cover gives no hint at what this woman's background is. She was raised in an abusive home by a horrible violent father and extremely progressive sex-positive mother. It's no wonder that the author (real name Claudette Powell) turned out the way she did, living away from any male contact and pushing liberal distortions of the faith.
Then this introverted southern girl from the wrong side of the tracks suddenly gets a job in radio, ends up in New York City for college, then goes to Hollywood babysitting for a powerful rich couple, and out of nowhere joins the Groundlings comedy club! The writer rushes through these major life changes and instead focuses on her claims of depression, never being happy with herself and clinging to a loser boyfriend/husband from a well-off background. The books ends when Covid starts and she wraps up the last five year in a few pages, so it feels incomplete.
She's drawn to all the wrong things in order to fill the void in her life, keeping secret her inner desire to let God do that. Along the way she reveals how admittedly dumb she is: she has never heard of Jimmy Fallon though she's a major member of an L.A. comedy club and her best friend is on Saturday Night Live; she knew nothing about New York City in the 1980s other than what she saw on I Love Lucy; she at one point is $150,000 in debt; and she had a boyfriend who would only be with her one day a week, never asking what he was doing the other six days (obviously cheating on her with dozens of women, which she didn't discover well into the marriage).
She also has visions. Like seeing people that aren't real.
She says she committed her life to Christ (raised a Baptist, though the family never went to church), followed rules of charity (learned when she became Mormon), and still reads her Bible (while having random sex hookups without guilt). Then she starts the process to join the Episcopal church in order to become a nun WHILE SHE'S STILL MARRIED to her husband! Is this the type of level-headed woman you'd want to give you spiritual guidance?
The answer is no. There's virtually nothing in her background or choices that show that she's a true woman of faith who takes her scripture seriously (beyond a few verses about giving or loving) and she certainly doesn't want a man to tell her what to do (and thus refuses to become a Catholic nun). She discovers her self-centered match in the Episcopal church because she's drawn to becoming a nun to fulfill her childhood fantasy (based on the movie A Nun's Story), escape men (and her father, who she told to never contact her again), and modernize the concept of being a religious (while doing political marches in her nun outfit).
The author oddly entered the convent despite having serious mental and physical health issues. She had depression, anxiety, misophonia (serious sensitivity to noises), fibromyalgia (which was misdiagnosed and ends up being psoriatic arthritis), and of course the residue of childhood abuse. Why does she go into a community where the world is mostly sealed off? To be "taken care of." Is that really a good reason for a person with so many issues to become a nun?
It takes her six years for final commitment and then she starts feeling the calling to become a priest in the Episcopal church. She mentions it a lot, as if she's unhappy simply being a lowly nun. But then she gets elected superior in charge of the convent, voted on by other nuns who may have been trying to punish her for her being so annoying. None of this makes joining a convent seem appealing and it fails to adequately explain what true faith in God is all about.
She certainly is opinionated--slamming Ronald Reagan and belittling conservatives from her Southern culture. She supports special rights for one skin color and those that break the Ten Commandments. She ignores anything in the Bible about sexuality or marriage in order to support those that think it's okay to sleep around with whomever you want. She's proudly liberal and Democrat, something many in the Christian community find difficult to square with scriptural faith.
It's also ironic that she chose to not capitalize "He" when referring to God, but she makes sure to capitalize the word black when referring to a person of color while not doing the same for white. Namely, her version of Christianity is narrow-mind, judgmental, intolerant, bigoted, unjust, and worse than anything she condemns traditionalists for.
Summarizing Jesus as being all about love and happiness shortchanges what His gospel was really about and ignores large portions of scripture. "My understanding of God is that God wants us to be happy, and therefore God has a plan for us to be happy and to thrive." Oh, how simplistic and naive. Please name the greatest spiritual leaders of Christian history (Popes, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther, the Apostle Paul, etc.) and you'll find that most of them didn't have "happy" lives. Dedication to the Lord is not just a way to "thrive" with self-centered success. I pray that she isn't promising that to the novices she's attracting through her TikTok videos.
The problem is, if she's only matching a calling with what she wants and only matching a church membership that aligns with her own political beliefs, she's not really allowing God to call her or use her. She's doing the calling, she's choosing what she'll be used for. And if she really wants to give herself over to Him, she must make a real change of habit.
The book's cover gives no hint at what this woman's background is. She was raised in an abusive home by a horrible violent father and extremely progressive sex-positive mother. It's no wonder that the author (real name Claudette Powell) turned out the way she did, living away from any male contact and pushing liberal distortions of the faith.
Then this introverted southern girl from the wrong side of the tracks suddenly gets a job in radio, ends up in New York City for college, then goes to Hollywood babysitting for a powerful rich couple, and out of nowhere joins the Groundlings comedy club! The writer rushes through these major life changes and instead focuses on her claims of depression, never being happy with herself and clinging to a loser boyfriend/husband from a well-off background. The books ends when Covid starts and she wraps up the last five year in a few pages, so it feels incomplete.
She's drawn to all the wrong things in order to fill the void in her life, keeping secret her inner desire to let God do that. Along the way she reveals how admittedly dumb she is: she has never heard of Jimmy Fallon though she's a major member of an L.A. comedy club and her best friend is on Saturday Night Live; she knew nothing about New York City in the 1980s other than what she saw on I Love Lucy; she at one point is $150,000 in debt; and she had a boyfriend who would only be with her one day a week, never asking what he was doing the other six days (obviously cheating on her with dozens of women, which she didn't discover well into the marriage).
She also has visions. Like seeing people that aren't real.
She says she committed her life to Christ (raised a Baptist, though the family never went to church), followed rules of charity (learned when she became Mormon), and still reads her Bible (while having random sex hookups without guilt). Then she starts the process to join the Episcopal church in order to become a nun WHILE SHE'S STILL MARRIED to her husband! Is this the type of level-headed woman you'd want to give you spiritual guidance?
The answer is no. There's virtually nothing in her background or choices that show that she's a true woman of faith who takes her scripture seriously (beyond a few verses about giving or loving) and she certainly doesn't want a man to tell her what to do (and thus refuses to become a Catholic nun). She discovers her self-centered match in the Episcopal church because she's drawn to becoming a nun to fulfill her childhood fantasy (based on the movie A Nun's Story), escape men (and her father, who she told to never contact her again), and modernize the concept of being a religious (while doing political marches in her nun outfit).
The author oddly entered the convent despite having serious mental and physical health issues. She had depression, anxiety, misophonia (serious sensitivity to noises), fibromyalgia (which was misdiagnosed and ends up being psoriatic arthritis), and of course the residue of childhood abuse. Why does she go into a community where the world is mostly sealed off? To be "taken care of." Is that really a good reason for a person with so many issues to become a nun?
It takes her six years for final commitment and then she starts feeling the calling to become a priest in the Episcopal church. She mentions it a lot, as if she's unhappy simply being a lowly nun. But then she gets elected superior in charge of the convent, voted on by other nuns who may have been trying to punish her for her being so annoying. None of this makes joining a convent seem appealing and it fails to adequately explain what true faith in God is all about.
She certainly is opinionated--slamming Ronald Reagan and belittling conservatives from her Southern culture. She supports special rights for one skin color and those that break the Ten Commandments. She ignores anything in the Bible about sexuality or marriage in order to support those that think it's okay to sleep around with whomever you want. She's proudly liberal and Democrat, something many in the Christian community find difficult to square with scriptural faith.
It's also ironic that she chose to not capitalize "He" when referring to God, but she makes sure to capitalize the word black when referring to a person of color while not doing the same for white. Namely, her version of Christianity is narrow-mind, judgmental, intolerant, bigoted, unjust, and worse than anything she condemns traditionalists for.
Summarizing Jesus as being all about love and happiness shortchanges what His gospel was really about and ignores large portions of scripture. "My understanding of God is that God wants us to be happy, and therefore God has a plan for us to be happy and to thrive." Oh, how simplistic and naive. Please name the greatest spiritual leaders of Christian history (Popes, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther, the Apostle Paul, etc.) and you'll find that most of them didn't have "happy" lives. Dedication to the Lord is not just a way to "thrive" with self-centered success. I pray that she isn't promising that to the novices she's attracting through her TikTok videos.
The problem is, if she's only matching a calling with what she wants and only matching a church membership that aligns with her own political beliefs, she's not really allowing God to call her or use her. She's doing the calling, she's choosing what she'll be used for. And if she really wants to give herself over to Him, she must make a real change of habit.
August 2, 2025
Loved this book about a woman who was an actor, Hollywood publicist, personal assistant and photo editor who decided to become an Episcopal nun. The story of her difficult childhood and her striving to get an education, her failed marriage and frenetic life in Hollywood and consistent interest in religion and desire to become a nun is funny and poignant. i especially enjoyed the portions that took place in Los Angeles. She became an Episcopalian at the church I grew up in (All Saints Beverly Hills) and was confirmed by the priest who married my sister and brother in law (Rev. Carol Anderson) which was so interesting to read. The accounting of her life in the convent in New Jersey was fascinating and uplifting. I’m now enjoying following the author on Instagram.
August 17, 2025
I’ve always had a fascination with nuns and their way of living and this book did a great job at telling it. Our author goes from her toxic southern household, and comes up north to follow her calling. It was very interesting to read all the details regarding life in the convent. From the way they were to be socially, to meal time, even to the decor. The fact the timeline also ended in 2020 was cool as well.
June 11, 2025
This was a good and really interesting memoir of a woman who gave up everything to become an Episcopalian Nun [a calling she'd had since childhood; a childhood fraught with pain, abuse, and poverty], and how that commitment changed her and ultimately, everyone around her.
Filled with straight-forward storytelling and littered with twisted humor [the Sister is very funny, and often is self-deprecating, in the "Chandler Bing" sort of style. The humor was very welcome especially after some of the tear-filled parts], this was a really great read and really encouraged me overall. I am so glad I had the opportunity to read this.
Thank you to NetGalley, Sister Monica Clare, and Crown Publishing/Crown for providing this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
Filled with straight-forward storytelling and littered with twisted humor [the Sister is very funny, and often is self-deprecating, in the "Chandler Bing" sort of style. The humor was very welcome especially after some of the tear-filled parts], this was a really great read and really encouraged me overall. I am so glad I had the opportunity to read this.
Thank you to NetGalley, Sister Monica Clare, and Crown Publishing/Crown for providing this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
June 14, 2025
Not what I expected in the best way. The author's story is fascinating and touching and I appreciated learning about her earnest and deep spiritual life. I'm glad she found the community she always sought.
May 19, 2025
It was beautiful story about Sister Monica Claire! So grateful to have been given the chance to read it. Great pacing and loved to hear how she worked through monastic life as she also felt a strong calling from God!
January 11, 2026
A brutally honest journey that finds redemption in the church. A lovely way to start the year!
August 13, 2025
I genuinely think this book made me a better person
July 8, 2025
Interesting story about one woman’s journey to become a nun. She begins her story when she was a child. She gives a lot of details of her difficulty childhood. I appreciate the honesty and back story. Overall, I enjoyed this, especially the details of convent life. I went to catholic school my whole life, and I had many nuns as teacher. Some weren’t my favorites, but most were wonderful. I’ll never forget my favorite, Sr. Miriam Bennet. She was smart, tough, loving and caring. She made me want to be a nun. I never got the calling, although I did prayed for it. Nuns are hardly seen these days, but I have always had a special place in my heart for them. They quietly do God’s work. I think they are undervalued in our society. I’m glad Sr. Monica Clare wrote this. I hope it inspires someone to listen, if a voice is telling them to follow a path to religious life. This story is inspirational. I recommend it.
May 30, 2025
Found the book tedious. Too often, way too often she says, “ I thought (they), (you), (she) didn’t like me. To which the answer inevitably is, “oh, yes. We love you. We want you to be our sister.” Author captures her own neediness too well. I respect her story and experience but the book needed a much better editing job.
A much better story about a woman in midlife joining a monastery if Stone Yard Devotional by Charlotte Wood.
A much better story about a woman in midlife joining a monastery if Stone Yard Devotional by Charlotte Wood.
August 20, 2025
This book could have been an email
May 31, 2025
Really enjoyed this one and have been impatiently waiting for my library hold to come through. This memoir from Sister Monica Clare was really lovely. I definitely can relate to searching throughout life (who CAN’T relate, let’s be real?!) for something more/bigger/a sense of purpose and belonging etc. The human experience for sure.
It was SO fascinating to me that she felt the call to become a nun at such a young age (age 7 ish) and then spent the next three + decades absolutely repressing it and lowkey hoping it would go away, while the call just became louder and louder. I did definitely relate to kind of like, doing things just because you’re “supposed to,” and bristling under society’s expectations of marriage/motherhood and so on. Her childhood was so heartbreaking to read, and later on when one of the priests/bishops (?) called her a “miracle,” that got me a little emotional. OBSESSED that she was like, IN THE GROUNDLINGS???? Her paths crossed with SO many comedians that I know of/grew up watching, and it’s absolutely crazy to think about the what if’s and zigzags of life!!! Side note: one of the nuns she later meets confessing to going to ALL THREE DAYS OF WOODSTOCK was an absolute unexpected delight.
Sister Monica Clare’s struggles with people-pleasing, doubt, rule-following etc., both before and after she joined the convent were intensely relatable, and I enjoyed her takeaways and learnings from them. (I, too, would have wanted RULES WRITTEN DOWN when joining the convent so I kind of love that she lowkey stole a couple rulebooks that other sisters said she didn’t need hahaha)
I highlighted a bunch of things but this quote from page 244 got me 😮💨
"I'm not okay with being bad at something." Until the words had come out of my mouth I hadn't realized the truth: I'm a perfectionist and when I can't get something right, my amygdala goes haywire and I believe I'm in danger, like an antelope hunted by a lion, like a comic being kicked out of a company.
“You're doing fine. It doesn't have to be perfect. You can make mistakes."
For a second the world stopped. That was an entirely original idea to me. I'd always believed that I had to get everything right, make everything perfect. This was earth-shattering. God had given me this lesson that I could still be imperfect and be loved. That's how God loves us. We humans are terrible at loving one another.
We're terrible at keeping peace. We're terrible at running the world and using our free will but for some reason God loves us all anyway.”
It was SO fascinating to me that she felt the call to become a nun at such a young age (age 7 ish) and then spent the next three + decades absolutely repressing it and lowkey hoping it would go away, while the call just became louder and louder. I did definitely relate to kind of like, doing things just because you’re “supposed to,” and bristling under society’s expectations of marriage/motherhood and so on. Her childhood was so heartbreaking to read, and later on when one of the priests/bishops (?) called her a “miracle,” that got me a little emotional. OBSESSED that she was like, IN THE GROUNDLINGS???? Her paths crossed with SO many comedians that I know of/grew up watching, and it’s absolutely crazy to think about the what if’s and zigzags of life!!! Side note: one of the nuns she later meets confessing to going to ALL THREE DAYS OF WOODSTOCK was an absolute unexpected delight.
Sister Monica Clare’s struggles with people-pleasing, doubt, rule-following etc., both before and after she joined the convent were intensely relatable, and I enjoyed her takeaways and learnings from them. (I, too, would have wanted RULES WRITTEN DOWN when joining the convent so I kind of love that she lowkey stole a couple rulebooks that other sisters said she didn’t need hahaha)
I highlighted a bunch of things but this quote from page 244 got me 😮💨
"I'm not okay with being bad at something." Until the words had come out of my mouth I hadn't realized the truth: I'm a perfectionist and when I can't get something right, my amygdala goes haywire and I believe I'm in danger, like an antelope hunted by a lion, like a comic being kicked out of a company.
“You're doing fine. It doesn't have to be perfect. You can make mistakes."
For a second the world stopped. That was an entirely original idea to me. I'd always believed that I had to get everything right, make everything perfect. This was earth-shattering. God had given me this lesson that I could still be imperfect and be loved. That's how God loves us. We humans are terrible at loving one another.
We're terrible at keeping peace. We're terrible at running the world and using our free will but for some reason God loves us all anyway.”
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 5, 2025
I read this book a few weeks ago but I guess never got around to writing a review. I picked this up because of the NYT article about the author piqued my interest.
Those of us women who were raised in the Catholic church I think at least a little bit thought about what it would be like to grow up to be a nun. There were so many interesting nuns in the news fighting for social justice and actually feeding the poor. They seemed like the only women that religion gave agency to.
So it was fascinating to hear this story, of a person who lived a big, full life in Hollywood but had such a devotion to her faith that she decided to become a nun and a priest. There are a lot of interesting details about her life, growing up in a family where there was violence, going to acting school in gritty New York, and doing improv with the Groundlings in LA.
She has a simple writing style that, while lacking on details, feels real. Some of the writing about religious topics are a little opaque because she doesn't have a lot of the words to explain things that are divine revelations. It's interesting to hear her categorize things like a shadow of a heart shape appearing on her book as a message from God. But a lot of those moments are very key to her life and her story.
I'm glad I read this book, only to get a peek into a life that's so different from my own, even if she does have similar hobbies to myself and feels like someone I might have met.
I recommend this book to: those who know nothing about nuns, people who like an inside scoop about Hollywood, and those who appreciate learning more about religion.
Those of us women who were raised in the Catholic church I think at least a little bit thought about what it would be like to grow up to be a nun. There were so many interesting nuns in the news fighting for social justice and actually feeding the poor. They seemed like the only women that religion gave agency to.
So it was fascinating to hear this story, of a person who lived a big, full life in Hollywood but had such a devotion to her faith that she decided to become a nun and a priest. There are a lot of interesting details about her life, growing up in a family where there was violence, going to acting school in gritty New York, and doing improv with the Groundlings in LA.
She has a simple writing style that, while lacking on details, feels real. Some of the writing about religious topics are a little opaque because she doesn't have a lot of the words to explain things that are divine revelations. It's interesting to hear her categorize things like a shadow of a heart shape appearing on her book as a message from God. But a lot of those moments are very key to her life and her story.
I'm glad I read this book, only to get a peek into a life that's so different from my own, even if she does have similar hobbies to myself and feels like someone I might have met.
I recommend this book to: those who know nothing about nuns, people who like an inside scoop about Hollywood, and those who appreciate learning more about religion.
April 17, 2025
This memoir is so unique and heartfelt. For me, I was so fascinated I couldn't put this book down ! Sister Monica came from such a sad , poor, and violent background. Even unexpectedly learning compassion for Clyde, whom she could never call Dad. I don't blame her. Instead, I am impressed and inspired by Sister Monica's life story. I love how God kept finding a way into her heart and calling her to Himself, but slowly and gently. Her triumphs over poverty, lack of religious guidance, lack of responsible parents, and lack of support, just make this an astonishing story.
Her life of becoming an Episcopalian nun was interesting for me since I am Roman Catholic, from the cradle. I didn't agree with some things , especially when she and another sister wanted to be able to go to church on Sundays, and were refused the priviledge for years. In my Catholic church, I am a daily communicant as much as I can. We have Mass available every day of our lives if we want it, with Communion ! The real presence of Christ , every day. So I was sad for her.
I was fascinated to read all about Sister Monica's life ministering in New York City to poor and homeless people at St Mary's. She lived a challenging life there similar to Mother Theresa, for awhile. Particularly poignant was the story she told of her struggles to accept all the homeless and her occassional fears for her safety, until one day, the Lord opened her heart in a unique way. Suddenly she saw them all as the small children they once were, needing her help. Her heart bloomed with love and compassion for them. Her response invigorated me. It was in these years that the Lord broke open her heart to forgive and have new found compassion for the struggles of Clyde. She realized his humanity. That was really powerful.
I would definitely recommend this book to anyone. God works in mysterious ways. This book uplifted me and made me feel more grateful about God's actions in my own life. I went on a vocation retreat to Cullman, AL to a beautiful Benedictine convent when I was 22. I realized my desire to be a mother was much stronger. God did call me to become a teacher, happily married, and a mother. I am now retired after a 35 year career in public schools. This book will encourage people to pray more for God's will to be made known in their life. This book is for everyone who loves God, no matter your religion , or vocation.
Thank you to Net Galley and the publisher for allowing me to read this ARC before publication in exchange for an honest review.
Her life of becoming an Episcopalian nun was interesting for me since I am Roman Catholic, from the cradle. I didn't agree with some things , especially when she and another sister wanted to be able to go to church on Sundays, and were refused the priviledge for years. In my Catholic church, I am a daily communicant as much as I can. We have Mass available every day of our lives if we want it, with Communion ! The real presence of Christ , every day. So I was sad for her.
I was fascinated to read all about Sister Monica's life ministering in New York City to poor and homeless people at St Mary's. She lived a challenging life there similar to Mother Theresa, for awhile. Particularly poignant was the story she told of her struggles to accept all the homeless and her occassional fears for her safety, until one day, the Lord opened her heart in a unique way. Suddenly she saw them all as the small children they once were, needing her help. Her heart bloomed with love and compassion for them. Her response invigorated me. It was in these years that the Lord broke open her heart to forgive and have new found compassion for the struggles of Clyde. She realized his humanity. That was really powerful.
I would definitely recommend this book to anyone. God works in mysterious ways. This book uplifted me and made me feel more grateful about God's actions in my own life. I went on a vocation retreat to Cullman, AL to a beautiful Benedictine convent when I was 22. I realized my desire to be a mother was much stronger. God did call me to become a teacher, happily married, and a mother. I am now retired after a 35 year career in public schools. This book will encourage people to pray more for God's will to be made known in their life. This book is for everyone who loves God, no matter your religion , or vocation.
Thank you to Net Galley and the publisher for allowing me to read this ARC before publication in exchange for an honest review.
September 28, 2025
This is such a fascinating story of a woman who at a young age knew she wanted to be a nun after watching the film, “A Nun’s Story”. This wasn’t a path that her family supported, so she ignored the call. She had been a comedienne (even a member of the “Groundlings”), comedy writer, musician, and photo editor.
After a loveless marriage, she returned to her desire to become a nun. It was a long, arduous path full of uncertainty about whether or not she would even be accepted. She was steadfast and eventually fulfilled all the requirements of becoming an Episcopal nun and then a priest.
My favorite quote is, “Anything that draws you to God is a prayer.” I wonder what that is for you?
After a loveless marriage, she returned to her desire to become a nun. It was a long, arduous path full of uncertainty about whether or not she would even be accepted. She was steadfast and eventually fulfilled all the requirements of becoming an Episcopal nun and then a priest.
My favorite quote is, “Anything that draws you to God is a prayer.” I wonder what that is for you?
Displaying 1 - 30 of 204 reviews