What do you think?
Living with My Dead Husband: A Navajo Woman's Year of Grief
What happens to a wife who is still in love with her husband after he crosses over? In this fearlessly honest memoir, Evelyn Begody brings readers with her on a miraculous journey of grief, healing, and unexpected humor.
When her husband Bo died on May 2, 2021, Begody was devastated until she realized that he was still stubbornly, undeniably present. Bo's insistence on lingering nearby as his new widow struggled to accept his physical absence imbues the story of her year-long odyssey with generosity and keen insight. From hesitant acknowledgment of Bo's continued existence to joyful immersion in the magic of each visit, the writer draws us into their earthly and unearthly bonds.
Evelyn Begody is an indefatigable seeker who leaves no terrain unexplored during her year of living with the dead.
"It's just plain smart. And very well written."
Lucy Maddox, Citizen Indians
"Love is a landscape. We live in it, travel in it, and move through all the pasts and futures that it contains. We exist because of it."
Robert Sullivan, Double Exposure
When her husband Bo died on May 2, 2021, Begody was devastated until she realized that he was still stubbornly, undeniably present. Bo's insistence on lingering nearby as his new widow struggled to accept his physical absence imbues the story of her year-long odyssey with generosity and keen insight. From hesitant acknowledgment of Bo's continued existence to joyful immersion in the magic of each visit, the writer draws us into their earthly and unearthly bonds.
Evelyn Begody is an indefatigable seeker who leaves no terrain unexplored during her year of living with the dead.
"It's just plain smart. And very well written."
Lucy Maddox, Citizen Indians
"Love is a landscape. We live in it, travel in it, and move through all the pasts and futures that it contains. We exist because of it."
Robert Sullivan, Double Exposure
384 pages, Paperback
Published July 31, 2024
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 1 of 1 review
August 20, 2024
Living with My Dead Husband
A Beautifully Crafted Journey through Grief
Navajo writer and teacher Evelyn Begody has crafted a beautiful, often lyrical tapestry of her year of coming to terms with her husband’s death. She interweaves strands from past, present, and dreams, often with wit and humor. Through many flashbacks and stories of her everyday life, we get to know her family and a bit of contemporary Navajo life.
Begody and her white husband experienced push-back from their families when they chose each other. It is sad to realize that the shadow of discrimination is still present today.
The book has three sections. Part 1 is the background story encompassing the joyous beginning of their life together, their thirty years of marriage, their children, Bo’s painful decline in health, and his death. Part 2 begins with the immediate aftermath of his death and the almost equally sad death of their beloved elderly dog, Scotty. The heart of Part 2 is a healing three-week road trip shared by Evelyn and her 80-year-old father, in which she seeks meaningful places to plant Bo’s ashes in Yosemite, the redwoods, and the Columbia River, among other places. Part 3 tells of her growth over the rest of the year as she returns home, continues teaching, connects more deeply with her children, and seeks solace through music, dancing, reading, outside help, and communicating with Bo, whose encouraging presence she constantly senses supporting her as he did in life. She returns to the Camino de Santiago, where she intended to walk a second time, but instead of walking, she writes.
Near the end of his life, Bo wondered why he was still alive. What’s the point of living? The afterword provides the answer the author wished she had been able to articulate at the time: “To right your path by beautifying ours. I see this so clearly now. That’s what I wanted to depict of the holy man of my life by writing this book.”
Begody has succeeded in creating one of the most realistic and moving portrayals of grief following the loss of a loved one that I have read, and in so doing, she has paid tribute to her beloved Bo and given a gift to all of her readers.
A Beautifully Crafted Journey through Grief
Navajo writer and teacher Evelyn Begody has crafted a beautiful, often lyrical tapestry of her year of coming to terms with her husband’s death. She interweaves strands from past, present, and dreams, often with wit and humor. Through many flashbacks and stories of her everyday life, we get to know her family and a bit of contemporary Navajo life.
Begody and her white husband experienced push-back from their families when they chose each other. It is sad to realize that the shadow of discrimination is still present today.
The book has three sections. Part 1 is the background story encompassing the joyous beginning of their life together, their thirty years of marriage, their children, Bo’s painful decline in health, and his death. Part 2 begins with the immediate aftermath of his death and the almost equally sad death of their beloved elderly dog, Scotty. The heart of Part 2 is a healing three-week road trip shared by Evelyn and her 80-year-old father, in which she seeks meaningful places to plant Bo’s ashes in Yosemite, the redwoods, and the Columbia River, among other places. Part 3 tells of her growth over the rest of the year as she returns home, continues teaching, connects more deeply with her children, and seeks solace through music, dancing, reading, outside help, and communicating with Bo, whose encouraging presence she constantly senses supporting her as he did in life. She returns to the Camino de Santiago, where she intended to walk a second time, but instead of walking, she writes.
Near the end of his life, Bo wondered why he was still alive. What’s the point of living? The afterword provides the answer the author wished she had been able to articulate at the time: “To right your path by beautifying ours. I see this so clearly now. That’s what I wanted to depict of the holy man of my life by writing this book.”
Begody has succeeded in creating one of the most realistic and moving portrayals of grief following the loss of a loved one that I have read, and in so doing, she has paid tribute to her beloved Bo and given a gift to all of her readers.
Displaying 1 - 1 of 1 review