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This book is not intended for everyone. Joe is a vile human that does disgusting and offensive things, both to himself and to others.
Meet Joe, a professional thief with a knack for finding the interesting spots in life—like the cramped closet of a centuries-old Victorian mansion. With crap timing, Joe goes in to pilfer a few trinkets. To avoid ultimately get caught, he stumbles upon the worst hiding spot imaginable... which is also the best thing that ever happened to him. With filthy floors, secret passageways, and more cobwebs than he ever asked for, he decides this would be the perfect place to plant some roots. There’s so much dust, so little time, and let’s be honest—a whole lot of sweat involved. Will he settle down and play house? One man’s quest for a place to belong will leave you wondering just how much he can really get away with—especially when the home is already occupied.
Meet Joe, a professional thief with a knack for finding the interesting spots in life—like the cramped closet of a centuries-old Victorian mansion. With crap timing, Joe goes in to pilfer a few trinkets. To avoid ultimately get caught, he stumbles upon the worst hiding spot imaginable... which is also the best thing that ever happened to him. With filthy floors, secret passageways, and more cobwebs than he ever asked for, he decides this would be the perfect place to plant some roots. There’s so much dust, so little time, and let’s be honest—a whole lot of sweat involved. Will he settle down and play house? One man’s quest for a place to belong will leave you wondering just how much he can really get away with—especially when the home is already occupied.
63 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 2, 2024
3 people are currently reading
10 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
July 12, 2025
Honestly that poor old woman…but the descriptions I was cracking up
November 14, 2025
This was one of the most disgusting yet funny books I have read.
August 11, 2024
This was a fun read. It had its gross and yuck moments, had its sexually inappropriate moments, AND it had its hilarious moments (which I’m thankful for it being fiction otherwise I’m pretty sure I’d get a one way ticket to hell for laughing) but I think what I liked most of all was the manipulation that was performed because honestly, it was pretty damn clever. And that epilogue, I am definitely looking forward to a second book! I loved this!
October 11, 2024
Really enjoyed reading this one. This is the first splatterpunk book that actually succeeded in making my stomach turn (the scene from chapter 7).
However, it really needed to be proofread. At first, it wasn't too bad, but in the second half of the book, there were spelling mistakes and a lot of grammatical errors, which was a tad distracting.
However, it really needed to be proofread. At first, it wasn't too bad, but in the second half of the book, there were spelling mistakes and a lot of grammatical errors, which was a tad distracting.
September 26, 2025
It was delicious and disturbing. Things are turkey basted and it’s not a turkey.
December 31, 2025
so gross and sad. better than please pick me i think.
December 26, 2024
Great little gross out story (chapter 7 was a big nope from me!! Haha).
It was well written and had a clear and clever storyline throughout.
Dark and disturbing themes so avoid if this is not your thing.
It was well written and had a clear and clever storyline throughout.
Dark and disturbing themes so avoid if this is not your thing.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews