This is an important book that gets to the heart of changing food-related behaviors. I have many takeaways from this book, noted below:
Introduction
* Some common types of bad relationships with food- cannot tell if we are hungry or eating our emotions, can’t stop eating once we start, mindless eating, strict food rules (food jail)
* Aim of this book: help you change your relationship with food
How did we end up in this mess? We don’t even know if we are hungry. Cravings that come from very different spaces and places all converge on one place- the urge to eat. Convenience, food engineering and emotions add up to make it really easy to get locked into poor eating habits.
How food habits form: Our behaviors are dictated by reinforcement learning
* Positive reinforcement: finding food sources, remembering and going back for more- trigger/cue, behavior, result/reward
* Negative reinforcement: avoiding unpleasant or unsafe experiences.
* The only way to change behavior is to change its position in the reward hierarchy. This can happen randomly like when getting food poisoning turns you off a favorite food. Or it can happen on purpose, which is based on one simple and critical ingredient: awareness.
Why diets and measuring don’t work: The focus on willpower to lose weight has one fatal flaw- that’s now how our brains work.
* Delay discounting: we prefer a smaller reward now over a bigger reward later. This is why willpower does not work.
* Success in changing eating habits depends on curiosity and kindness.
* Map your food habit loops
** Why you eat- craving, stress, boredom, habit are all different from true hunger
** What you eat- Food high in sugar or simple carbs affect the brain differently
** How you eat- quickly and mindlessly or mindfully
** Map out your habit loops of trigger -> behavior -> result/reward- it is like flipping a light switch to see your behavior and where you are tripping up
* Identifying your urges- hunger or something else? Craving is different from hunger- hunger focuses on getting calories in while craving is centered around the desire for something in particular. Unless we regain bodily awareness, it can be challenging to understand the difference between hunger and craving.
Interrupting habit loops with awareness
** If you pay attention and experience that something is better than expected, you get a positive prediction error and that behavior is reinforced
** If you pay attention and experience that something is worse than expected- the salty bag of potato chips gave me a headache- you get a negative prediction error in your brain and that behavior isn’t reinforced
** If you don’t pay attention, you can’t get a positive or a negative prediction error. You just keep the old habit going.
** Practically speaking, for most unhelpful behaviors, the more we pay attention, the more disenchanted we get, they appear less and less magical because we’re seeing and feeling clearly that they are not rewarding
* Mindful eating
* Mindfulness is awareness and curiosity. Eating with awareness means that you notice how food looks, smells, feels, tastes
* Reconnect with your body
* The body scan can be a helpful and simple and powerful way to start reinhabiting your own body. Over time, you will begin to distinguish cravings from homeostatic hunger.
* Get to know your pleasure plateaus: The pleasure plateau can let you know when you’ve had enough- is this bite more pleasurable, the same, or less pleasurable than the last one?
** Don’t fall for the “clean plate club”- stop eating when you’ve had enough.
* Craving tool- eat whatever you’re craving but pay careful attention to what you’re getting from it.
** “What do I get from this?”
** Build your disenchantment databank - store of memories where satisfying a craving didn't actually make you feel better. When you have enough data of this type, your cravings don’t have the same pull that they used to.
** The question “what am I getting from this?” is set up to help you right now. Move from overindulgence and automatic eating to being content now.
* Retrospectives- looking back to move forward
** It is human to slip up but by putting these experiences to good use, you can transform them from failure/shame into an impetus for progress.
** What can I learn from this?
* The craving tool: Notice when you have a craving for food, imagine eating it in all its glory, then imagine the results in great detail, how it felt in your body. The urge might pass or lose its power (disenchantment) or it may get stronger in which case you can eat the food with awareness and record the data on how it makes you feel
* RAIN on the craving monster’s parade. We have a screaming toddler inside us but we can love ourselves and train ourselves to choose helpful behaviors at the same time.
** RAIN practice
** Recognize the craving (persistent desire for a specific food) and relax into it
** Allow and accept the experience with a smile- don’t distract or try to do anything about it
** Investigate the experience with curiosity- how does it feel in your body?
** Note the experience and name the sensations you’re experiencing- don’t identify with your thoughts, emotions, body sensations
* Noting: Noting is putting a frame around our experience. It inserts a bit of distance and you gain perspective. You are not as identified with them and they lose power.
* Pay attention to your experience in 6 categories- seeing, hearing, feeling (body sensations), smelling, tasting, thinking.
* There is a whole group of voices inside our head and the judging and shaming voices make us feel bad and lead to more eating to soothe feelings. Name these voices to create distance and perspective.
* Stay curious and open minded instead of getting stuck in habit loops of self-judgment and blame: What do I really want?
* A choice freely chosen will be embraced more deeply and more consistently than one which is dictated from on high
Step 1 is awareness of old habit loops
Step 2 is awareness of how unrewarding the old habit loops are
Step 3 is an unforced freedom of choice
* The food we eat impacts how we feel emotionally (this also works the other way around). Knowing how what we eat affects our energy, mood, health allows us to find and choose bigger better offers
Awareness helps you to become enchanted with foods that serve your health and well-being
* Build a mental databank of foods that are satisfying for you in the short and long term
* Kindness cools the brain regions that heat up with craving
* Practice genuine kindness to yourself: “You’re doing the best you can”
* When it comes to changing habits- whether letting go of old ones or developing new ones- the brain follows one path and one path only- changing reward value
* Instead of treating cravings as obstacles that we need to endure or fight we can think of them as teachers and lean in and learn from them
* Simply take it one moment at a time, one bite at a time
* Eating mindfully has a higher reward value than perpetuating unhelpful habit loops