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Devout: Losing My Faith to Find Myself
A gripping memoir of faith, family, identity, and stardom, in Devout pop star David Archuleta shares his story of leaving the Mormon church, navigating the relationship with his emotionally abusive father, coming to terms with his sexuality, and finding strength in being your authentic self.
Three years ago American Idol alum and pop star David Archuleta found himself on the floor of his apartment, suicidal, riddled with anxiety, and pleading to a god he was no longer sure even existed. It was a crisis of faith and identity, but it was also a turning point for a man who grew up queer in the Mormon church with severe anxiety and constantly under the pressure of his overbearing manager of a father. After that night, David vowed to be his authentic self.
Of course, the journey to authenticity is never easy, which is the story Archuleta shares in Devout. From his childhood growing up in the Mormon church, to allegations of sexual abuse against his father and step-grandfather, to his time on American Idol and how the show runners and producers mistreated their young contestants, Archuleta’s memoir is filled with earnest, revelatory anecdotes from his fascinating personal and public lives.
Not just for Archuleta’s myriad fans, Devout is a universal story of hope, told with sincerity and humility. It’s a salve for anyone who’s felt different, questioned their faith, felt they were living inauthentically. Most importantly, it’s a story for anyone whose had to break yourself down in order to rebuild yourself stronger than ever, and that’s everyone.
Three years ago American Idol alum and pop star David Archuleta found himself on the floor of his apartment, suicidal, riddled with anxiety, and pleading to a god he was no longer sure even existed. It was a crisis of faith and identity, but it was also a turning point for a man who grew up queer in the Mormon church with severe anxiety and constantly under the pressure of his overbearing manager of a father. After that night, David vowed to be his authentic self.
Of course, the journey to authenticity is never easy, which is the story Archuleta shares in Devout. From his childhood growing up in the Mormon church, to allegations of sexual abuse against his father and step-grandfather, to his time on American Idol and how the show runners and producers mistreated their young contestants, Archuleta’s memoir is filled with earnest, revelatory anecdotes from his fascinating personal and public lives.
Not just for Archuleta’s myriad fans, Devout is a universal story of hope, told with sincerity and humility. It’s a salve for anyone who’s felt different, questioned their faith, felt they were living inauthentically. Most importantly, it’s a story for anyone whose had to break yourself down in order to rebuild yourself stronger than ever, and that’s everyone.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published February 17, 2026
567 people are currently reading
6785 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 508 reviews
February 15, 2026
Obviously being his sister I’m a bit biased but holy shiznuts it was very healing to read. For anyone else in the LGBTQ+ community also struggling with religious expectations I hope you’re able to find comfort in this.
February 23, 2026
This is it. This is the ultimate book I would recommend to anyone who would want to understand me—and every other queer person who grew up Mormon—better on a personal level. I can't quite believe I get to live to see this day.
Like David Archuleta, I grew up queer in the LDS church. I loved music and played the piano at church. I sang solo at mission events. I conducted choir for a while after. My entire family was tuned in to David Archuleta's season of American Idol—we were rooting for the sharp-looking faithful boy who shared our religion. I listened to his church songs on repeat and they had been my companions in many of my darkest hours. I was inspired by his decision to put his music career on hold to serve a mission. I watched his Face to Face devotional repeatedly on my mission. I was gaining a better awareness of my mental health struggles when his Therapy Sessions album came out. And I came out just a few months after he did.
So much of David's story mirrors my own that it's almost ridiculous, and I believe it mirrors a lot of queer Mormons' as well. There's so much abuse and gaslighting and neglect and an incredibly destructive amount of shame. But I hope many young queer Mormons get to read this and find just how much hope there can be, how much grace can be found for one's self and for others, how much love and light is readily available, even outside the church.
He'll never see this, and I know this might come across as entirely parasocial, but I just really want to say: thank you, David, for being one of the greatest inspirations of my childhood. Thank you for paving the way for myself and many other queer Mormons to come out and be more honest about their feelings about the church. Thank you for carving out space for more conversations to help Mormons realize that we queer people aren't just in pursuit of sin, we don't leave the church just because we refuse to control our desires, many of us have actually strived to be faithful for years but have been pushed past the point of tolerance. Ultimately, thank you for sharing this story. It has been so healing for me. I wish you continued success and happiness in this life.
Like David Archuleta, I grew up queer in the LDS church. I loved music and played the piano at church. I sang solo at mission events. I conducted choir for a while after. My entire family was tuned in to David Archuleta's season of American Idol—we were rooting for the sharp-looking faithful boy who shared our religion. I listened to his church songs on repeat and they had been my companions in many of my darkest hours. I was inspired by his decision to put his music career on hold to serve a mission. I watched his Face to Face devotional repeatedly on my mission. I was gaining a better awareness of my mental health struggles when his Therapy Sessions album came out. And I came out just a few months after he did.
So much of David's story mirrors my own that it's almost ridiculous, and I believe it mirrors a lot of queer Mormons' as well. There's so much abuse and gaslighting and neglect and an incredibly destructive amount of shame. But I hope many young queer Mormons get to read this and find just how much hope there can be, how much grace can be found for one's self and for others, how much love and light is readily available, even outside the church.
He'll never see this, and I know this might come across as entirely parasocial, but I just really want to say: thank you, David, for being one of the greatest inspirations of my childhood. Thank you for paving the way for myself and many other queer Mormons to come out and be more honest about their feelings about the church. Thank you for carving out space for more conversations to help Mormons realize that we queer people aren't just in pursuit of sin, we don't leave the church just because we refuse to control our desires, many of us have actually strived to be faithful for years but have been pushed past the point of tolerance. Ultimately, thank you for sharing this story. It has been so healing for me. I wish you continued success and happiness in this life.
February 17, 2026
I stayed up all night reading the book when it was released and I was hooked. This book is vulnerable, heartbreaking and beautifully written. David was failed by so many in his life. He’s overcome so much in his life. I wish I could give David a solid side hug and tell him he’s supported and we’re all created differently. This book shows his strength. He should be proud of himself for the strong person he’s become.
March 22, 2026
This man can write and tell a compelling story as well. Add bravery and a voice that melts hearts, and you have one memorable memoir that I ate up.
February 28, 2026
Fantastic memoir about coming out, religious deconstruction, and navigating fame as a young person with controlling family members. Archuleta mentions being friends with Janette McCurdy and her own memoir giving him courage to write his own, and that kind of tracks. Both of them were raised in conservative households and pushed into the limelight by obsessive parents regardless of their own wishes.
Archuleta recounts his childhood, his father's determination to make him a star and have him practice singing constantly, the impact of his Mormon faith on his sense of identity and how long he denied his own queerness. It's well written, interesting, and impactful. His story feels unfinished, but this memoir is a flag in the ground, a declaration of who he is now and the direction he is choosing for his life. I received a copy of this book for review from the publisher, all opinions are my own.
Archuleta recounts his childhood, his father's determination to make him a star and have him practice singing constantly, the impact of his Mormon faith on his sense of identity and how long he denied his own queerness. It's well written, interesting, and impactful. His story feels unfinished, but this memoir is a flag in the ground, a declaration of who he is now and the direction he is choosing for his life. I received a copy of this book for review from the publisher, all opinions are my own.
February 26, 2026
I did not expect how raw and vulnerable this would be. David discusses religious scrupulosity, emotional and spiritual abuse, shame and guilt, and the massive shortcomings regarding the LDS church’s understanding and treatment of LGBTQ+ community. As a former Mormon girl who had the biggest crush on him, to an ex Mormon who is cheering for him and every other queer person who is struggling, I felt so touched by his memoir. This should be required reading for LDS leaders and members.
February 21, 2026
I don’t know how I can possibly stress how important it is that EVERY person read this book. It was absolutely fantastic. The audiobook was incredible and the songs at the end made me bawl my eyes out. As a fellow ex Mormon who is also still trying to figure out what it means to be human - thank you, David, for writing this book.
February 18, 2026
This book made me feel the exact same way as when I read “I’m glad my mom died” or “educated”. It is a sad, pull your heart strings kind of feeling. The shared Mormon background has always pulled me to these memoirs.
As a fan of David since 5th grade, it breaks my heart to know what he went through behind the scenes. This is exactly how I felt when I read Jennette’s story, having religiously watched iCarly every week. You truly never know what people are going through.
As a fan of David since 5th grade, it breaks my heart to know what he went through behind the scenes. This is exactly how I felt when I read Jennette’s story, having religiously watched iCarly every week. You truly never know what people are going through.
Want to read
April 29, 2025I am LOVING his new music. I think this will be good.
February 22, 2026
I love David Archuleta’s voice. And I’ve respected him as a person for many years. I watched him as a kid on Star Search, I voted for him every week on American Idol, and listened to his church music for years.
His memoir, while not literary or artful as a piece of writing, is honest and brave and raw. I relate to David’s history with OCD manifesting in intense religious scrupulosity, encouraged by religious community and leaders. I relate to his process of self-discovery; his decision to value his lived experience and to trust himself; and the happiness and peace he found by stepping away from his religion and into authenticity. I also relate to the lasting impact of religious trauma and sheer rejection by a beloved community.
I’m blown away by how much David has been through and the goodness and humility he has maintained in the face of intense challenges. I’m rooting for him as a kindred spirit, and rooting for other gay religious kids in the many communities where “out and proud” simply doesn’t exist.
His memoir, while not literary or artful as a piece of writing, is honest and brave and raw. I relate to David’s history with OCD manifesting in intense religious scrupulosity, encouraged by religious community and leaders. I relate to his process of self-discovery; his decision to value his lived experience and to trust himself; and the happiness and peace he found by stepping away from his religion and into authenticity. I also relate to the lasting impact of religious trauma and sheer rejection by a beloved community.
I’m blown away by how much David has been through and the goodness and humility he has maintained in the face of intense challenges. I’m rooting for him as a kindred spirit, and rooting for other gay religious kids in the many communities where “out and proud” simply doesn’t exist.
March 10, 2026
I finish this book with a desire to be a kinder and more compassionate person. ❤️
David was vulnerable, heartfelt, raw, and fair.
David was vulnerable, heartfelt, raw, and fair.
February 19, 2026
I've been a fan of David since he was on American Idol. The fact that we were both from Utah and Mormon was a huge pull for me. Hearing his story is heartbreaking, but ends so hopeful. I left the church shortly after he did, so even though I can't relate to his precise struggles with the church, I can relate to many of the other issues he outlines.
It was hard to read at times because I was also that self-righteous Mormon that knew best. But it was also refreshing to know that we found a better way and got out.
The abuse he receives from his father and the teachings of the church have a shuttering parallel that really shook me. I'm not sure if that was the intent, but it was very impactful.
Highly recommend the audiobook for the songs he sings at the end. Though I will be purchasing a book trophy as well.
It was hard to read at times because I was also that self-righteous Mormon that knew best. But it was also refreshing to know that we found a better way and got out.
The abuse he receives from his father and the teachings of the church have a shuttering parallel that really shook me. I'm not sure if that was the intent, but it was very impactful.
Highly recommend the audiobook for the songs he sings at the end. Though I will be purchasing a book trophy as well.
February 27, 2026
I went into Devout knowing it was going to be personal, but even with that expectation, I wasn’t prepared for just how raw and honest David Archuleta would be.
This book is vulnerable in a way that feels almost sacred. He walks us through his upbringing in the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the pressure of growing up in the public eye after American Idol, and the impossible tightrope he tried to walk between faith, identity, and authenticity. You can feel how deeply he wanted to be “good,” to belong, to do everything right, even when it meant silencing parts of himself.
What hit me hardest was how gentle he is with everyone in his story, even when describing painful experiences. There’s no bitterness here. Just honesty. You can see how much he wrestled with his sexuality, his beliefs, and the fear of losing community. His decision to step away from the church isn’t framed as rebellion…it’s framed as survival. As growth. As choosing truth.
As someone who has watched his career from the beginning, I couldn’t be happier for him. It takes so much courage to untangle yourself from something that shaped your entire world. To choose yourself publicly. To risk disappointing people who once defined your sense of worth. I support him fully in that choice. I myself grew up in the church and left it.
Devout isn’t about tearing faith down…it’s about rebuilding it in a way that makes room for who you really are. It’s about learning that devotion to yourself matters too.
Five stars. Proud of him. Rooting for him. And grateful he trusted us with this part of his story.
This book is vulnerable in a way that feels almost sacred. He walks us through his upbringing in the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the pressure of growing up in the public eye after American Idol, and the impossible tightrope he tried to walk between faith, identity, and authenticity. You can feel how deeply he wanted to be “good,” to belong, to do everything right, even when it meant silencing parts of himself.
What hit me hardest was how gentle he is with everyone in his story, even when describing painful experiences. There’s no bitterness here. Just honesty. You can see how much he wrestled with his sexuality, his beliefs, and the fear of losing community. His decision to step away from the church isn’t framed as rebellion…it’s framed as survival. As growth. As choosing truth.
As someone who has watched his career from the beginning, I couldn’t be happier for him. It takes so much courage to untangle yourself from something that shaped your entire world. To choose yourself publicly. To risk disappointing people who once defined your sense of worth. I support him fully in that choice. I myself grew up in the church and left it.
Devout isn’t about tearing faith down…it’s about rebuilding it in a way that makes room for who you really are. It’s about learning that devotion to yourself matters too.
Five stars. Proud of him. Rooting for him. And grateful he trusted us with this part of his story.
February 18, 2026
crush went triple platinum in my bedroom in 2008, and now I get to display his memoir on the bookshelf in my living room in 2026
୨ৎ 4.5 stars, a reflective memoir where David draws the curtain on the harmful doctrines within the Mormon faith, especially the impact on queer people. Mormanism will never stop being interesting for me to learn about, in part because it comes across as a cult. David' maturity and vulnerability shine as he discusses complex family dynamics, especially his relationshop with his father, who was emotionally abusive, and his brother who suffers from signficiant mental health issues. I am only somewhat surprised to learn that his journey on american idol was not all that it was portrayed to be.
fyi, the audiobook includes 3 unreleased songs inspired by his journey writing this book, which was the perfect way to close out his story.
source: Libro.FM
୨ৎ 4.5 stars, a reflective memoir where David draws the curtain on the harmful doctrines within the Mormon faith, especially the impact on queer people. Mormanism will never stop being interesting for me to learn about, in part because it comes across as a cult. David' maturity and vulnerability shine as he discusses complex family dynamics, especially his relationshop with his father, who was emotionally abusive, and his brother who suffers from signficiant mental health issues. I am only somewhat surprised to learn that his journey on american idol was not all that it was portrayed to be.
fyi, the audiobook includes 3 unreleased songs inspired by his journey writing this book, which was the perfect way to close out his story.
source: Libro.FM
February 26, 2026
Super proud of David for sharing his story. I've already read a few articles trying to say how David should have come to a different conclusion and how sad it is that he left the one thing that could've brought him peace.
I'm not sure if these people actually read his book or not but if so, they missed the plot. For someone with religious scrupulosity, religion is not a place where peace is found but rather a breading ground for pain and heartache. I'm proud of David for finding his own voice and path. It's heartbreaking to hear how the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints caused him so much suffering, and then how top leadership preaches doctrine that is not actually from God but presents it as if it is. After reading this book (and Second Class Saints - another must read to better understand how top leadership deals with difficult issues and how difficult it is for them to break through bias), I pray the church corrects it's wrongs faster than it has taken them in the past.
I'm grateful David lived to tell his story, unfortunately for many other queer members of the LDS faith that is not the case. Let's do better at creating space for our queer brothers and sisters to tell their stories and validate their pain! It's possible that when we are told in LDS scripture that the path is straight and narrow, it's because each path is so individualized that the narrowness described refers to us being the only person on it. In this way I believe all paths can be honored, even if they are different.
People like David who are brave enough to tell their stories deserve to be listened to and I don't believe I'm being dramatic in saying that it will literally save lives to not only listen these stories but learn to hold space for them. I believe if Christ was here, that is what he would be doing! Thank you for sharing your story David. I hope you continue to find light and peace and joy as you continue to live as your most authentic self.
I'm not sure if these people actually read his book or not but if so, they missed the plot. For someone with religious scrupulosity, religion is not a place where peace is found but rather a breading ground for pain and heartache. I'm proud of David for finding his own voice and path. It's heartbreaking to hear how the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints caused him so much suffering, and then how top leadership preaches doctrine that is not actually from God but presents it as if it is. After reading this book (and Second Class Saints - another must read to better understand how top leadership deals with difficult issues and how difficult it is for them to break through bias), I pray the church corrects it's wrongs faster than it has taken them in the past.
I'm grateful David lived to tell his story, unfortunately for many other queer members of the LDS faith that is not the case. Let's do better at creating space for our queer brothers and sisters to tell their stories and validate their pain! It's possible that when we are told in LDS scripture that the path is straight and narrow, it's because each path is so individualized that the narrowness described refers to us being the only person on it. In this way I believe all paths can be honored, even if they are different.
People like David who are brave enough to tell their stories deserve to be listened to and I don't believe I'm being dramatic in saying that it will literally save lives to not only listen these stories but learn to hold space for them. I believe if Christ was here, that is what he would be doing! Thank you for sharing your story David. I hope you continue to find light and peace and joy as you continue to live as your most authentic self.
February 28, 2026
It feels weird to write a review about a persons memoir, especially about someone that I have basically grown up with. I loved david since idol and have followed his music and I do feel like he was honest with even his own short comings in this book.
This book was hard. It was probably one of the most difficult books for me to read because the story of David Archuleta that I had in my head is not the same one he experienced. I did find it interesting that as you progress through his book, his writing gets better. It starts off as if he is writing it as his younger self and it felt very much like a journal (you know your cringey teen or tween journals) and was annoying. By the end it was much better.
Due to the many parts of the books that he writes about, I am going to space my review by topic.
Leaving the church/gay
I have been very curious for a lot of my life why he left the church and what a person who was part of the church feels being gay. This book answered all of that very clearly and I don’t blame him at all. Based on his struggles personally with homosexuality within the church alone I can see why he wanted to leave and I am happy for him and his family that they have found peace and happiness as the reshape their new life.
His music
I am not going to lie, a difficult part about this book for me was that it has made me not like some of his early music. A lot of it was directed by his dad and compared to some of his later stuff (2020), when his dad wasn’t involved and dictating what he should sing, his newer stuff feels more real, passionate, and personal. One part that makes me sad is that his Christmas stuff has always had a special place in my heart at a time when I needed it and I don’t know if I can listen to it after this book and how he describes how he felt singing it. It won’t feel as real to me. Therapy sessions with still be my #1 because that album saved me.
Idol
I loved getting to see an insider into idol because I always wanted to try out for it. I am so glad I didn’t based on his experience. So seeing what that was like for him was really cool and the opportunities it brought out for him.
The church
This is the main reason for my star rating. I understand that his home life was terrible growing up. Having a friend experience similar things, I don’t blame him for how he responded to family members and for what he understood certain things in the church to mean. I did find some of his explanations for what we do in the church to be superficial and lacking in respect for those who are still in the church. I do understand that some of the processes he was explaining are difficult to explain any other way but others felt like they were just done out of hate and anger towards the church (again based on his experience I don’t blame him)
-church leaders
This subsection has mostly to do with M Russell Ballard and his interactions there and with the church. I do wish that the church was better at how they run the church, but I also know that for me, the church is a vessel that brings me closer to people around me. I wish for more of an open conversation with people who struggle in various capacities and wish that had been the case for David and elder Ballard. I think his open dialogue with him was good and seemed respectful, and I hope one day in the future our church can be more accepting and Christlike to those who want to be apart of it even if they don’t fit the mold.
Things I wished he would have included are references to his quotes.
All in all, I feel like he was real and honest, his life is a challenge for sure with some of his perspectives he had about the church from his family, the leaders, himself and others around him. I am glad there were people who helped him see who was hurting him, who helped save him because everyone deserves to be here and loved, and I truly hope for the best. I am glad he is making music for himself that is true to him. I appreciate the work he put into this book and how difficult it may have been to relive some of those difficult experiences. I loved his testimony of the revelation he received from god and it was a testament to me of how loving god is to ALL people.
This book was hard. It was probably one of the most difficult books for me to read because the story of David Archuleta that I had in my head is not the same one he experienced. I did find it interesting that as you progress through his book, his writing gets better. It starts off as if he is writing it as his younger self and it felt very much like a journal (you know your cringey teen or tween journals) and was annoying. By the end it was much better.
Due to the many parts of the books that he writes about, I am going to space my review by topic.
Leaving the church/gay
I have been very curious for a lot of my life why he left the church and what a person who was part of the church feels being gay. This book answered all of that very clearly and I don’t blame him at all. Based on his struggles personally with homosexuality within the church alone I can see why he wanted to leave and I am happy for him and his family that they have found peace and happiness as the reshape their new life.
His music
I am not going to lie, a difficult part about this book for me was that it has made me not like some of his early music. A lot of it was directed by his dad and compared to some of his later stuff (2020), when his dad wasn’t involved and dictating what he should sing, his newer stuff feels more real, passionate, and personal. One part that makes me sad is that his Christmas stuff has always had a special place in my heart at a time when I needed it and I don’t know if I can listen to it after this book and how he describes how he felt singing it. It won’t feel as real to me. Therapy sessions with still be my #1 because that album saved me.
Idol
I loved getting to see an insider into idol because I always wanted to try out for it. I am so glad I didn’t based on his experience. So seeing what that was like for him was really cool and the opportunities it brought out for him.
The church
This is the main reason for my star rating. I understand that his home life was terrible growing up. Having a friend experience similar things, I don’t blame him for how he responded to family members and for what he understood certain things in the church to mean. I did find some of his explanations for what we do in the church to be superficial and lacking in respect for those who are still in the church. I do understand that some of the processes he was explaining are difficult to explain any other way but others felt like they were just done out of hate and anger towards the church (again based on his experience I don’t blame him)
-church leaders
This subsection has mostly to do with M Russell Ballard and his interactions there and with the church. I do wish that the church was better at how they run the church, but I also know that for me, the church is a vessel that brings me closer to people around me. I wish for more of an open conversation with people who struggle in various capacities and wish that had been the case for David and elder Ballard. I think his open dialogue with him was good and seemed respectful, and I hope one day in the future our church can be more accepting and Christlike to those who want to be apart of it even if they don’t fit the mold.
Things I wished he would have included are references to his quotes.
All in all, I feel like he was real and honest, his life is a challenge for sure with some of his perspectives he had about the church from his family, the leaders, himself and others around him. I am glad there were people who helped him see who was hurting him, who helped save him because everyone deserves to be here and loved, and I truly hope for the best. I am glad he is making music for himself that is true to him. I appreciate the work he put into this book and how difficult it may have been to relive some of those difficult experiences. I loved his testimony of the revelation he received from god and it was a testament to me of how loving god is to ALL people.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 10, 2026
I feel honored to live in a time where I loved David Archuleta as a Mormon and love David Archuleta as an ex Mormon. You ate with this one bb. Vulnerable as frick
Listen, If David Archuleta can’t get through to the quorum, then nobody can.
Listen, If David Archuleta can’t get through to the quorum, then nobody can.
February 28, 2026
Lovely read. I forgot how much I love memoirs. There’s so much beauty in getting to walk in someone else’s shoes for a moment. The power of vulnerability :) Totally worth reading! 💗
February 18, 2026
As a queer person who was also raised in the church and is just now getting out, this book speaks to my soul. Thank you David for sharing your experiences 🫶
February 28, 2026
I’ve been a fan of David Archuleta since his time on American Idol, so I went into this book already admiring him — and it completely exceeded my expectations.
I listened to the audiobook, and hearing David share his story in his own voice made the experience incredibly personal and powerful. There’s something so amazing about listening to someone reflect on their faith, identity, struggles, and growth in such an honest way.
What moved me most is how universal the message feels. No matter where you are in life or how you identify — gay or straight, religious or questioning — there is something here for you. This book shares messages of love, kindness, forgiveness, and hope. It’s vulnerable, heartfelt, and deeply human. I absolutely adored it.
I listened to the audiobook, and hearing David share his story in his own voice made the experience incredibly personal and powerful. There’s something so amazing about listening to someone reflect on their faith, identity, struggles, and growth in such an honest way.
What moved me most is how universal the message feels. No matter where you are in life or how you identify — gay or straight, religious or questioning — there is something here for you. This book shares messages of love, kindness, forgiveness, and hope. It’s vulnerable, heartfelt, and deeply human. I absolutely adored it.
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March 15, 2026No rating for a memoir.
First of all, love David, have always loved David, will always love and be rooting for David.
I loved how he would say "fuck" and "shit" but said "good as heck" haha. Classic ex-mormon swearing pattern.
This book was definitely written by David. I would recommend the audiobook over a written copy; it was very conversational and flowed better in an audiobook format.
My great wish for him is that he is able to live his life however he wants to and that he can release himself from the obligation of sharing his life to convince anyone of anything. I just want him to be free.
Wish there had been less American Idol stuff and more Mormon stuff but that's just because of who I am as a person.
Loved a couple of Dolly mentions.
First of all, love David, have always loved David, will always love and be rooting for David.
I loved how he would say "fuck" and "shit" but said "good as heck" haha. Classic ex-mormon swearing pattern.
This book was definitely written by David. I would recommend the audiobook over a written copy; it was very conversational and flowed better in an audiobook format.
My great wish for him is that he is able to live his life however he wants to and that he can release himself from the obligation of sharing his life to convince anyone of anything. I just want him to be free.
Wish there had been less American Idol stuff and more Mormon stuff but that's just because of who I am as a person.
Loved a couple of Dolly mentions.
February 27, 2026
I loved this. Good for David for being open and vulnerable, that couldn’t have been easy. An important read for people to understand the impact of religion, and how necessary it is for us to have some compassion for people who are different than us
February 26, 2026
I cannot imagine the amount of courage it took to put these experiences into words and then release them for the world to read… May the universe send you all the love and healing and hope you deserve my friend ♥️.
Deconstructing a life long belief system and then reconstructing life after Mormonism is the hardest, most heart wrenching and also the best and most freeing thing I have done to this point. Doing it as the poster child for the LDS church? I can’t even fathom.
Deconstructing a life long belief system and then reconstructing life after Mormonism is the hardest, most heart wrenching and also the best and most freeing thing I have done to this point. Doing it as the poster child for the LDS church? I can’t even fathom.
February 20, 2026
This is an incredibly honest and vulnerable memoir starting when David was a child. Dealing with religious guilt, emotional abuse, his rise to fame, all the way to now as an openly gay man.
February 21, 2026
This will be a very biased review from an Archie fan since 2008. I will say, being a bookworm and audiobook listener, I was very impressed by the writing and flow of the book and of the narration by David. I would have to give a content warning for the entire book basically, but I think David did a really good job of expressing intense and hard things in a way that was not triggering or insensitive. I listened on 1.0 speed across 2 days to fit it in before the book tour session on 02/20/2026
I cried a lot. I cried on behalf of David, myself, and the world that lets this occur. I feel like I am part of David’s story and he is part of mine, and part of a lot of others’. It is bittersweet that we share these feelings and experiences. I was too young to see him tour during the first wave of his musical career but I feel like I grew up alongside him and watched him change with me. (Almost 2 decades later that “Let’s Talk About Love” song has a new meaning to it.) I was at 2 Christmas shows after he came out. I was at one in 2022 where he had his encore and I cried then and can’t ever listen to “My Little Prayer” without getting emotional. I did the VIP session for that show and David was on vocal rest, but gave me the most wonderful full-on hug with a smile on his face. Learning what it took to let him give and receive affection again, that picture of that hug is even more special now. I was also at the one in 2024 where he talked very openly about his feelings about the Christmas songs and hinted at his dad’s role in those albums and losing autonomy in that. I was one of the cancelled tickets when he had vocal cord issues again during the Therapy Sessions tour but I saw him for the Earthly Delights tour and did a VIP session again. David has constantly shown up for us, and I am shocked at how he even managed to after reading this, so it makes me even more happy to see him continue to start showing up for himself. I now understand more why I felt so impacted by David over the years and by different songs and I’m so grateful for this book and for anyone who has the courage to stay.
I cried a lot. I cried on behalf of David, myself, and the world that lets this occur. I feel like I am part of David’s story and he is part of mine, and part of a lot of others’. It is bittersweet that we share these feelings and experiences. I was too young to see him tour during the first wave of his musical career but I feel like I grew up alongside him and watched him change with me. (Almost 2 decades later that “Let’s Talk About Love” song has a new meaning to it.) I was at 2 Christmas shows after he came out. I was at one in 2022 where he had his encore and I cried then and can’t ever listen to “My Little Prayer” without getting emotional. I did the VIP session for that show and David was on vocal rest, but gave me the most wonderful full-on hug with a smile on his face. Learning what it took to let him give and receive affection again, that picture of that hug is even more special now. I was also at the one in 2024 where he talked very openly about his feelings about the Christmas songs and hinted at his dad’s role in those albums and losing autonomy in that. I was one of the cancelled tickets when he had vocal cord issues again during the Therapy Sessions tour but I saw him for the Earthly Delights tour and did a VIP session again. David has constantly shown up for us, and I am shocked at how he even managed to after reading this, so it makes me even more happy to see him continue to start showing up for himself. I now understand more why I felt so impacted by David over the years and by different songs and I’m so grateful for this book and for anyone who has the courage to stay.
Want to read
April 8, 2025DAVID??? ON MY BOOKSHELF??? I’m sat sir
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March 4, 2026🎧 on Audiobook
Trying to put all my thoughts together so sorry for the long reviews always!!!
1st of all, David was failed by so many people in his life growing up. By his dad especially but also his whole family system, the church and church culture, the higher ups on American Idol, etc. etc. I feel so bad for everything he had to navigate on his own. I had no idea the extent of the emotional abuse he went through.
This book is more of a journal and reflection on David’s memories and his experiences as a little kid to now without going super into depth or expanding on much. It’s also mostly focused on his experiences with the LDS church which is valid since the church does encompass your life with or without intention when growing up in it.
I really enjoyed his insights on someone who is a member of the LGBTQ+ community who at times still wanted to be involved in religion but can not justify it and all of the pain and heartache that comes with that. He expressed that he wants members of the community to have a place in the LDS church, but in a much more accepting way than the way they’re allowed now. His insights into his conversations with Elder Ballard were also very interesting. I do think leaders of the church need to gain a little more understanding of the current struggles people are actively going through now and be better at addressing them. We all need greater compassion to listen and to try harder to understand and advocate for others, especially those who are different than you.
I’m glad David has found happiness and hope and I hope he continues to find healing and purpose.
(If I was actually judging the writing and not the content, I would have a few thoughts. The chapters just end so suddenly and it feels so choppy. Also he speaks a lot about what he thinks other people think or say about him without really knowing. It’s a little cheesy and the conversations between people are a little juvenile at times but it is easy to read. Also the F word doesn’t bother me in books ever but sometimes they felt a little forced here. I think he’s still actively healing and hurting and I would be interested in an addition in like 10 years.)
TW: Emotional Abuse, suicidal ideation
Trying to put all my thoughts together so sorry for the long reviews always!!!
1st of all, David was failed by so many people in his life growing up. By his dad especially but also his whole family system, the church and church culture, the higher ups on American Idol, etc. etc. I feel so bad for everything he had to navigate on his own. I had no idea the extent of the emotional abuse he went through.
This book is more of a journal and reflection on David’s memories and his experiences as a little kid to now without going super into depth or expanding on much. It’s also mostly focused on his experiences with the LDS church which is valid since the church does encompass your life with or without intention when growing up in it.
I really enjoyed his insights on someone who is a member of the LGBTQ+ community who at times still wanted to be involved in religion but can not justify it and all of the pain and heartache that comes with that. He expressed that he wants members of the community to have a place in the LDS church, but in a much more accepting way than the way they’re allowed now. His insights into his conversations with Elder Ballard were also very interesting. I do think leaders of the church need to gain a little more understanding of the current struggles people are actively going through now and be better at addressing them. We all need greater compassion to listen and to try harder to understand and advocate for others, especially those who are different than you.
I’m glad David has found happiness and hope and I hope he continues to find healing and purpose.
(If I was actually judging the writing and not the content, I would have a few thoughts. The chapters just end so suddenly and it feels so choppy. Also he speaks a lot about what he thinks other people think or say about him without really knowing. It’s a little cheesy and the conversations between people are a little juvenile at times but it is easy to read. Also the F word doesn’t bother me in books ever but sometimes they felt a little forced here. I think he’s still actively healing and hurting and I would be interested in an addition in like 10 years.)
TW: Emotional Abuse, suicidal ideation
March 9, 2026
3.5 ⭐⭐⭐💫 (rounded up). While David isn’t the strongest writer, his story was eye-opening and heartbreaking to me. I watched his season of American Idol, so it was especially sad to learn what was happening behind the scenes. He was the textbook “good guy,” yet the church didn’t seem to deserve him as their poster child. It was heartbreaking how quickly they distanced themselves once he chose to live more authentically and come out as queer.
I was surprised by the amount of detail he shared about his relationship with his family, especially his father, but it was good to hear that boundaries have allowed for healthier relationships. I guess if you've been the "good guy" your whole life and then you recognize the emotional abuse, you may not care to protect those people from scrutiny.
I know my own standing in the church influences how I see this, but I really feel like church leaders have painted themselves into a corner by never publicly admitting mistakes. We’re taught that if the Book of Mormon is true, then Joseph Smith and the prophets who followed are true spokesmen for God who will never lead us astray. But when that doesn’t seem to hold up, it makes everything else feel like it could crumble too. That kind of rigidity and the unwillingness to acknowledge fault have pushed a lot of people to leave rather than try to make it work. I wish the candid acknowledgement Elder Ballard gave David (admittedly, this is his recollection of the conversation) had been made publicly, too.
For a church that leaves a lot of grace for the imperfections of its people, it sure doesn't grant that same grace or allowance for its leaders' mistakes. The joke rings true: Catholic people teach that Popes are perfect, but nobody believes it. Mormons teach that prophets are imperfect, but no one believes it.
I was surprised by the amount of detail he shared about his relationship with his family, especially his father, but it was good to hear that boundaries have allowed for healthier relationships. I guess if you've been the "good guy" your whole life and then you recognize the emotional abuse, you may not care to protect those people from scrutiny.
"Well of course you're allowed to make mistakes. We all make mistakes. Even the prophet and the apostles." [Elder Ballard] brought up that 2015 policy about the children of gay parents not being allowed to be baptized until they were eighteen. "We realize that was a mistake. We messed up. So we had to take it back."
But they don't really think of it as a mistake. Excommunication was their only solution for gay people—to cut them off from God rather than find a way for all to belong within the church community...."
I know my own standing in the church influences how I see this, but I really feel like church leaders have painted themselves into a corner by never publicly admitting mistakes. We’re taught that if the Book of Mormon is true, then Joseph Smith and the prophets who followed are true spokesmen for God who will never lead us astray. But when that doesn’t seem to hold up, it makes everything else feel like it could crumble too. That kind of rigidity and the unwillingness to acknowledge fault have pushed a lot of people to leave rather than try to make it work. I wish the candid acknowledgement Elder Ballard gave David (admittedly, this is his recollection of the conversation) had been made publicly, too.
For a church that leaves a lot of grace for the imperfections of its people, it sure doesn't grant that same grace or allowance for its leaders' mistakes. The joke rings true: Catholic people teach that Popes are perfect, but nobody believes it. Mormons teach that prophets are imperfect, but no one believes it.
March 6, 2026
In this memoir, American Idol finalist David Archuleta recounts his childhood path to stardom, his devotion to the Mormon faith, and coming out of the closet to himself, his family, and his fans.
David mentions both Jennette McCurdy's and Charlie Bird's memoirs as inspiration for this book. His enmeshment and emotional abuse from his father mirrors much of Jennette's story; while trying to balance fame, queerness, and membership in the Church overlaps somewhat with Charlie's. David's book also reminded of Alyson Stoner's recent autobiography and their underdeveloped sense of self as they reached adulthood.
Very conversational tone (sometimes almost too much?). It's narrated by the author, and it was really easy to listen to.
Many members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will likely be uncomfortable hearing about some of David's interactions with Elder Ballard, a revered apostle. It's obvious that Elder Ballard and David had mutual love and respect for one another, but some of the stories weren't particularly flattering for a man in the upper echelons of Church leadership. I'm also not sure if many members will appreciate the conclusions David reaches about his relationship with the Church and with God. But I think most members will probably know whether they will want to read this book before they pick it up.
The audio ends with a couple of songs. I've always loved David's voice!
Strong language; several f-words (especially in later chapters).
Some very candid talk surrounding sexual acts.
David mentions both Jennette McCurdy's and Charlie Bird's memoirs as inspiration for this book. His enmeshment and emotional abuse from his father mirrors much of Jennette's story; while trying to balance fame, queerness, and membership in the Church overlaps somewhat with Charlie's. David's book also reminded of Alyson Stoner's recent autobiography and their underdeveloped sense of self as they reached adulthood.
Very conversational tone (sometimes almost too much?). It's narrated by the author, and it was really easy to listen to.
Many members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will likely be uncomfortable hearing about some of David's interactions with Elder Ballard, a revered apostle. It's obvious that Elder Ballard and David had mutual love and respect for one another, but some of the stories weren't particularly flattering for a man in the upper echelons of Church leadership. I'm also not sure if many members will appreciate the conclusions David reaches about his relationship with the Church and with God. But I think most members will probably know whether they will want to read this book before they pick it up.
The audio ends with a couple of songs. I've always loved David's voice!
Strong language; several f-words (especially in later chapters).
Some very candid talk surrounding sexual acts.
February 19, 2026
Absolutely stunning book! It was a lot heavier than I was expecting. David did not hold back in his narrative which led to a rich story-telling experience. He called himself, people, organizations, and society out on their shit which was very refreshing and brave, especially given the LDS corp goes to great lengths to preserve their image.
I’ve heard some Mormons say online that David “betrayed” the LDS church and that David owes his success to the church, but David’s book makes it clear he became be a superstar regardless of (and perhaps in spite of) the church. Us members of the church pretended he belonged to only us because David also starved with the rest of us the first Sunday of each month in cold buildings with carpet on the walls. But he’s always been his own person who deserves all his success regardless, even if it took some time for him to see it.
Anyway, beautiful book. I really hope that those who need to read this book have the opportunity to do so. Thank you, David, for writing it!
I’ve heard some Mormons say online that David “betrayed” the LDS church and that David owes his success to the church, but David’s book makes it clear he became be a superstar regardless of (and perhaps in spite of) the church. Us members of the church pretended he belonged to only us because David also starved with the rest of us the first Sunday of each month in cold buildings with carpet on the walls. But he’s always been his own person who deserves all his success regardless, even if it took some time for him to see it.
Anyway, beautiful book. I really hope that those who need to read this book have the opportunity to do so. Thank you, David, for writing it!
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