A Pawtobiography: My adventures on Gone Fishing

by Ted the Dog

Top 5 Sunday Times bestseller now in paperbark!

Ted's sniff and tell
It’s hard to believe Ted was once a skinny, unwanted pup who was dumped outside an animal shelter, before he found fame and fortune alongside Bob Mortimer and Paul Whitehouse on the hit BBC series Gone Fishing.

In this exclusive exposé, Ted reveals what it’s like working alongside two national treasures and what really happens when the cameras stop rolling.

With searing honesty, he gives his unique viewpoint on living in a dog's world and he speaks about how you – yes you – can make it a better place for everyone.

This is his story, in his own words.

Nearly all of it is true.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Biography, Comedy, Animals, Audiobook, Dogs

Kindle Edition

Published November 7, 2024

Reviews

[Maureen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’ve often thought that the BBC show’s ‘Gone Fishing’ is just the perfect relaxing watch - a real antidote to all the bad news that we see on a daily basis.

It features real life comedian friends, Bob Mortimer and Paul Whitehouse, with the pair sitting on the banks of meandering rivers, discussing everything under the sun, generally just ‘chewing the cud’, and it’s not only amusing to witness but it’s also really moving at times too.

So okay it’s a fantastic piece of tv, but what elevated this show to an even higher level was the introduction of Ted the Patterdale Terrier dog. Ted belongs to the producer of the show, and this is his Pawtobiography!

Whilst there was some sadness in Ted’s life, his short pawtobiography is full of fun, wisdom and humanity, which is the defining characteristic of this hugely popular tv show. Ted, you started life as a skinny unwanted pup, but to us here in the UK, you are the most adorable little dog, and a national treasure!

Thanks to GR friend Lisa - OwlBeSatReading
for putting this on my radar.

[Lisa - HowlBeSatReading 🐺 · Rating 3 out of 5]

“Time really slows down on the riverbank. It’s a rather magical place. I can see why fishing is so popular. There is space to really stop, think and reflect. Usually I’m far too busy arsing around to devote my time to any of those things”.

Ted, you are a superstar, a daft, fuzzy, lovable furball. Thank you for sharing your little life story with me.

[Laura Stone · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just as wholesome as expected ❤️ lovely little read to start the new year

[Brendan Day · Rating 2 out of 5]

A strangely humourless tv cash-in. Anybody who loves a dog will find bits to coo at, but on the whole this memoir is poorly-executed, maudlin and never quite absurd enough.

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having to only read this out loud, to my partner, meant that this book took me way longer than it should have done. If I had been reading this just by myself, I probably would have finished it in a day.

So, Ted the dog has finally 'written' his own story. For fans of Mortimer and Whitehouse Gone Fishing, Ted will be a well-known addition to that programme by now. A rather scruffy, slightly square looking dog with an incredible under-bite, he has won the hearts of many viewers. The programme is a lovely, gentle reflection on life and friendship, offering something to those of us who don't even like fishing. With Ted, Paul and Bob found a lovely way to add some humour to the show (not that it wasn't funny before Ted came along). With Paul offering a voice to Ted, viewers came to hear about what was going on in Ted's head as he shared the riverbank with them. Insights into his briefcase, and a clear fashion sense just shone through. Ted's pawtobiography enables readers to delve a little deeper into the pooch's past.

This is such a charming little book. Viewers of the show will identify with aspects introduced to us from there. But this book looks to flesh out Ted's story, shining a light on how a young, unwanted pup, went on to then sharing screen time with two comedy legends. There are also lovely little illustrations dotted in each chapter which bring Ted and the other characters to life even more.

This is such a lovely, charming book. There is a touch of sadness throughout his story, but what really shines through is the love, fun and humanity of his story now. For any fans of Gone Fishing, I think this would make a perfect gift. It is definitely going to be one book which stays in my personal library, so that I can enjoy it again in the future.

[George Cochrane · Rating 1 out of 5]

As someone already said - 'too childish for adults and too adult for children'.

[Kat Long · Rating 3 out of 5]

Reading this on a sun lounger in the beaming sun was just lovely. Funny, easy to read and so heartwarming! Finished it in one sitting. I’m a cat person but this lowkey convinced me that I need a little chill dog to follow me round cafes and pubs. Maybe in the future. But a very high compliment from me!

PS - Thanks to Sophie’s dad for letting me borrow this 🫡

[Jon Smith · Rating 3 out of 5]

An amusing bit of fluff, written apparently by Ted, the dog made famous by Paul and Bob on Gone Fishing. Tells you something of Ted’s background as a rescue dog, and reflects on his best bits in the series. The photos are the best thing, and then the drawings in the book … and then the text. It is very short, like Ted, and don’t bother if you have never seen the show, because it will be totally confusing. If you have, you might like the depth of canine philosophy that drips and drools from the pages.

[Simon Ackroyd · Rating 4 out of 5]

I kept thinking that 'Gone Fishing' fans will love this, while most others will just find it bizarre and surprisingly short, which it is, in both respects. I am a 'Gone Fishing' fan, and a massive fan of Ted, and asked for this because of the show; 99% of readers will be just like me, know what to expect, assume some of the stories from the show are in there and that we learn a bit more about Ted. Well, we do learn stuff about Ted, but this is a strange concoction of autobiography and fiction. I didn't love it; it really is too short, but the illustrations are adorable, and several moments made me laugh.

[Grahaeme Jones · Rating 3 out of 5]

I got this as a Christmas present because I enjoy the calm and serene joys of “Gone Fishing” which features Paul Whitehouse and Bob Mortimer plus the magnificent presence of Ted.

The book is a rather enjoyable pawtobiography that explains Ted’s rise to stardom. Written with the gentle but slightly absurd humour that is very much a trademark of Bob Mortimer, some of it might be true and some of likely to be a wonderful embellishment. Some of the points it makes about dogs are wonderfully observed, and it should make you more appreciative of any dog that might appear in your life.

Enjoyable fluff and nonsense.

[Grant S · Rating 1 out of 5]

As a big fan of Gone Fishing someone thoughtfully gave me this book for Christmas and I was looking forward to maybe a few laughs and an insight into the show in the eyes of Ted. What I got was a book that could have been written by a 12yo and for their peer group. The text is big as is the line spacing to presumably pad it out enough to justify a hardback.

I tried to treat it as irreverent nonsense but there is not one single laugh let alone a smile and gave me a strong sense that the author was trying very hard to mimic Bob.

My cynicism suggests this book was bashed out to shamelessly exploit the programme and the icing on the cake being the two sycophantic plugs for Bob’s book The Satsuma Complex.

The only reason the book was not a DNF as it would be akin to giving up on The Tiger Who Came to Tea.

[Tihar · Rating 2 out of 5]

Sorry Ted but I really couldn’t gage who this book was aimed at, it was too childish for adults and too grown up for children, but, saying that I had to finish it.

The last chapter about Dolly and ‘Your rules about owning a dog’ caught my heart.

[Sam · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a delightful read even if you haven't seen the Gone Fishing programme (which I haven't) that tells of Ted's story from his earliest memories to the present day. Ted has had a massively varied life and he doesn't hold anything back in this pawtobiography, if anything he may give away too much (or create too much) to weave a superb tale (tempted by the pun there). There is love and loss as Ted finds his people and keeps them on the right path while trying to keep to his and trying to find his lost briefcase. Humourous as well as touching, a delightful story that you should share, in between burying it in the back garden.

[Jemmy Lee · Rating 3 out of 5]

For dog lovers, and fans of “Gone Fishing”, this is adorable. Told from the perspective of the much-beloved Ted the dog, it’s a short and simple story, a bunch of anecdotes and fantastical tales from his life as a celebrity hound (supposedly).

It was a bit short, the audiobook clocking in at a mere 2 hours. Perhaps aptly, as Ted says, what with dogs having such a short time on this earth. But it was funny and cute, and even a little sad.

Bonus: it also ended with a recipe that I’m going to try for my own wonderful pooch!

[Rasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

A short, quick read that had me laughing out loud. Dog pawrents will love this as it is packed with doggie wisdom and humour in equal measure.

Plus - a good addition to your yearly read total especially round this time of year when those who count (like me) are trying to fit in as many titles as possible before 2024 runs out!

🤣🤓📚

[Eddie Farrington · Rating 3 out of 5]

A quick fun read brimming with charm. Made for fans of Gone Fishing and makes for a perfect accompaniment. It did sort of feel like it had been rushed out and written in about 5 days and the writing could have flowed a bit better.

[Julia Mayhew · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5.

[Michaela Mcguinness · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very entertaining short book that gained me a true insight into the life behind a national treasure - Ted.

[Lynne - The Book Squirrel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant read, laughed so much!

[Mark Skeplorn · Rating 3 out of 5]

A lighthearted read about a quite a character, didn’t take long to read and wouldn’t pay full price

[Sam Reynolds · Rating 3 out of 5]

‘Where’s my briefcase’

[Jodie F · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a goof

[Jan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good fun easy read, oozing with Ted's personality.

Thoroughly enjoyable.

[Bea Louise · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such a wholesome book. Absolutely perfect for a one-sitting read on a Sunday afternoon.

[Hollie Fuller · Rating 5 out of 5]

me: I never cry at books
also me: cries at book written by dog

[Cheryl Mathieson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book Ted, such an enjoyable look at your life. The Muppets are so lucky to have you! I'll keep an eye out for your briefcase 💼

[Steph Hall · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very cute! And gorgeous drawings to accompany it. Ted is one cool doggo.

[patrycja · Rating 4 out of 5]

i love dogs😔

[Ella B · Rating 4 out of 5]

Got this book for my birthday as a birthday stocking filler (i.e. I didn't ask for it) and I enjoyed my time with it. Lots of references to Gone Fishing and other Mortimer related things.

It reads more like a children's book but I think it had potential to be a longer more in depth story - especially if written by Bob Mortimer as others have suggested

Quick and cute would recommend to Gone Fishing Fans

[Kate Murray · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best biographies I've ever read! Ted is so full of spirit and adventure, I hadn't realised he had so much depth. I hope the briefcase turns up one day!
Thank you Nioka. xx