Leasing

by D.T. Robbins

David, like every other rock-bottom soul, runs out of options and ends up working at Victoria Lawn—the raunchiest, most dysfunctional apartment complex in the suburbs of Southern California. After finding the body of a deceased resident with a similar backstory, David is forced to navigate a revolving shit-world of death and sex and violence. Will he make it out alive or will property take him like it’s taken so many others? Leasing is the hilariously are-you-fucking-kidding-me? story of one man’s struggle to protect himself and the downtrodden characters he’s forced to co-exist with from being crushed by the corporate powers that be. Find out if David, or anyone else, can survive such complete and seemingly hopeless bullshit….

Genres: Novella, Fiction, Novels

190 pages, Paperback

Published September 20, 2024

About the author

D.T. Robbins is the author of Birds Aren't Real (Maudlin House) and founding editor of the lit mag and small press, Rejection Letters.

Reviews

[Kevin Maloney · Rating 5 out of 5]

Leasing is a buck wild novel about the dead-end jobs we endure in our ridiculous quest to stay alive. It’s a little like The Florida Project set in Southern California, or Harry Crews writing an episode of The Office while high on acid, only the office is in hell, and the acid is actually PCP. DT Robbins is the patron saint of fuckups, and his sick, perverted world will make you holy.

[Claire Hopple · Rating 5 out of 5]

Perfectly seamless, hilarious, and just a damn treasure of a novel. Robbins is teaching is all how to tell a story. I wish I could read it for the first time again.

[Emma McCoy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A witty, brilliant book that had me laughing out loud at every turn. Raunchy and hilarious, I couldn’t believe what was happening to David. I wanted more from the ending, but that’s life. 4.5/5

[KKUURRTT · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best book I’ve ever read about apartments.

[Deb Poole · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very quick, fun read; as a person who has worked in the Property Management/Leasing/sales field for many, many years, this book is WAY more true than you know! Kudos to DT Robbins for finally laying bare the seamy, gross things we encounter in our weird ass jobs!

[alec · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5-4.9 ⭐️

SoCal trash gothic. Makes me miss that insane lawless land that I grew up in. Funny, honest, nihilistic. Can’t wait to read more from D.T. Robbins, guy’s got serious talent.

[Eric Frost · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not to be too dark, but I imagine Victoria Lawn has entirely burned down now? Or did it survive the recent fires?

[Cody Shrum · Rating 5 out of 5]

So much fun. I don’t think I’ve laughed out loud that many times while reading a book, to the point of annoying my wife. Even Birds Aren’t Real didn’t quite have this effect on me, though the last time I reacted to a book this way was while reading that. The sense of humor Robbins imbues into the story felt tailor-made for me. In fact the novel spoke to me in many ways that felt specific to me and of course that can’t be true, but it speaks to Robbins’ ability to tell a grounded, emotional, human story while also spinning a yarn with crazy shit happening on every page.

Leasing is a workplace comedy in the most relatable, realistic and yet at absurd way possible. Try to read this book without laughing/ snorting repeatedly. Try not to relate to it. Try not being sad when you reach the end.

[Drew Hawkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

The short bursts of chaos that are the scenes in LEASING form a cohesive whole much in the same way the mind threads together flashes in a dream. Except here it's more nightmare than dream (but a fun nightmare!). And the language itself is its own character. While this book definitely (for sure, definitely) not about him, Robbins' prose certainly isn't spare or lacking description. It oozes from the page. Have fun with this one.

[Mathias Kruse · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one was a lot of fun, there was some plot going through the book but I appreciated the episodic approach where each chapter focuses mainly on some individual scenario or tenant and then there’s a bit of story that gets carried through those happenings. I laughed out loud a handful of times, pretty funny book with a lot of wild scenes. The characters were great too.

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

An absolute riot. D.T. Robbins is a master of hilarious raunch and perfectly nails the dirtbag aesthetic. Leasing is social satire that doesn’t take itself too seriously and is quite possibly the most fun I’ve had reading a book in a long while!

[Hayley Neal · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wowza!

What a freaking fun silly ride! I ate up every turn of the page. Mel rocks, Jared sucks, Rick you poor yet lovable thing, and David you are one hell of a narrator. The writing and plot felt nostalgic yet innovative and fresh! Can’t wait to read more from D. T. Robbins!!

[Matt · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really, really enjoyed this. Just weirdly intense, surprisingly action packed but somehow believably so. If you’ve ever lived in an apartment with crappy management, this book will help you reach catharsis.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is flawless and I had a great time reading it

[Josh Rank · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fast, wild ride. Fun stuff with the perfect amount of existential dread mixed in.

[Anthony Verdi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Who would win in a wrestling match, dt or god… trick question DT is god

[J. H. · Rating 5 out of 5]

A new classic of L.A. sleaze.

[Julian Martinez · Rating 5 out of 5]

Leasing is a thrill ride set in an apartment complex where the protagonist (who is NOT a stand-in for D.T. Robbins, according to him) watches coworkers come and go, tenants move in and get chased out, all the while wondering what he’s still doing there. Robbins is so good at dialogue and pacing. So many moments and images from this book are seared into my memory. For all the raunch and gallows humor, there’s so much heart packed into Leasing’s slim length. I’m excited for rereads down the line, when I want to experience the turns and loop-de-loops of this rollercoaster all over again.

[lawrence · Rating 5 out of 5]

Leasing by D.T. Robbins is funny, sure. It’s actually hilarious. But it also has a human feel to it. People working and living in hell, or Victoria Lawn, as it’s known here. You see the characters at their worst and even worse than that. I think the apartments are located in one of Dante’s circles of hell, but that’s never confirmed in the story. Any time you think things can’t devolve, or misfortunes can’t become more unfortunate, they do. But it happens in the funniest ways possible, and there’s some self reflection. It’s mostly ignored, or drowned in alcohol, but it’s there. You won’t find a more entertaining read. And since most of us have languished in a job we despised, it feels good to get some enjoyment out of a relatable story. Just how relatable is something for you and your therapist to talk about.

I read an ARC of this Leasing and wrote this review of my own free will. I swear it. I am not blinking twice.

[kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this is probably my favorite kind of book. This was a little aimless, episodic & a random glimpse into somebody's depressing life. Vignettes of our messed up world that make you feel a little bleak (while laughing, of course) but with glimmers of hope throughout. Just fucked up enough to make me feel better about my own lifetime of working with the sometimes crazy public.

[Amy DeBellis · Rating 5 out of 5]

D.T. Robbins has managed to craft a book filled with humor and bleak absurdism, with touches of both nihilism and tenderness. The gruesome scenes were hella gruesome!! The funny scenes were hella funny!! And the soul-calcifying dread of working at this corporate job was fully palpable. Also, I never before considered a stapler as a weapon, but now I do.

[Aubri Kaufman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Leasing feels a little like watching a car crash while sucking down a healthy dose of laughing gas. Funny, grotesque, and surprisingly human: D.T. Robbins nails the human experience in the most unexpected of ways.

[D.T. Robbins · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wrote this book, BUT THIS BOOK IS NOT ABOUT ME!

[S.R. Schulz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wild, raunchy, heartfelt, poignant

[Aimee Truchan · Rating 4 out of 5]

SoCal Noir. I loved this book. Fringe LA characters - trying to survive, others ready to surrender to the unlucky hands they have been dealt. Quick, clever, and dark.

[Joshua Turek · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a funny and grim read. Like a gory Office Space. I loved it and didnt want it to end

[Varshitha · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was such a weird, gross, funny book. completely outlandish but somehow I still felt like I was reading a real person's account of totally ridiculous events. a really fun, original, wild read

[Tex Gresham]

Told in a voice that is confidently very much the writer, no pretensions or attempts to emulate. Like a guy at a bar telling you an enthralling story filled with WTFs, solid jokes, and moments that make you go “damn dude… that sucks.”

Hearing DT read from the book brings a whole other life to the story, like going from a Tamagachi to a Furby—both fun but one P E R F O R M S. I know that doesn’t make sense but it does to me.

If you like books about the worst workplace you can imagine and the desperation one feels realizing that that workplace both is and isn’t your entire existence, then you’re doing yourself a disservice by not reading this.

DT gave me $13 to write this review.

[Jack Bullion · Rating 5 out of 5]

A worthy entry into the literary canon of bullshit jobs--imagine Bartleby scrivening at a run-down apartment complex populated by the biggest weirdos you've ever met and you’ll tap into Leasing’s vibe. Funny (some of the best drinking scenes in indie lit), bawdy (some of the best sex scenes in indie lit), and weirdly moving. Sit back and let DT Robbins tattoo a “cool S” on the inside of your skull.