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Finding Peace When Your Heart Is In Pieces: A Step-by-Step Guide to the Other Side of Grief, Loss, and Pain
A sensitive approach to overcoming loss!
Behind every tragedy and loss lies a tranquil reality just waiting to be found. Finding Peace When Your Heart Is in Pieces shows you how to use the Four Paths of Transformation--acceptance, inspiration, release, and compassion--to move past your suffering and discover inner peace. Author Paul Coleman, PsyD, guides you through every chapter with powerful exercises that help you evaluate your current emotional state and how the hardship has impacted your life. With his guidance and insight, you will learn how to transform your pain into positive thinking, find perspective through charitable acts, and hone in on what you need to do to step into a brighter future.
Whether mourning the loss of a romance, health, a loved one, or coping with any of life's upheavals, Finding Peace When Your Heart Is in Pieces will help you overcome your pain and finally find peace within yourself.
Behind every tragedy and loss lies a tranquil reality just waiting to be found. Finding Peace When Your Heart Is in Pieces shows you how to use the Four Paths of Transformation--acceptance, inspiration, release, and compassion--to move past your suffering and discover inner peace. Author Paul Coleman, PsyD, guides you through every chapter with powerful exercises that help you evaluate your current emotional state and how the hardship has impacted your life. With his guidance and insight, you will learn how to transform your pain into positive thinking, find perspective through charitable acts, and hone in on what you need to do to step into a brighter future.
Whether mourning the loss of a romance, health, a loved one, or coping with any of life's upheavals, Finding Peace When Your Heart Is in Pieces will help you overcome your pain and finally find peace within yourself.
- GenresNonfictionGrief
224 pages, Paperback
First published October 3, 2014
5 people are currently reading
121 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
September 4, 2017
I decided while reading this that grief cannot really be approached "step by step".
September 15, 2019
I appreciated the author's philosophy, "Bad things happen. Accept that and grow anyway."
I found author Paul Coleman's advice on what makes I especially found a peaceful heart especially helpful,
"A peaceful heart:
1. Seeks simplicity, where life is not driven by either deprivation or accumulation.
2. Lets go of anxieties and false beliefs that we cling to as life preserves but that are actually fear preservers.
3. Knows that the things let go will cost little, that peace is compatible with a need to cling.
4. Looks within itself, without judgement. Therein lies a deeper understanding.
5. Makes peace with uncertainty; knows that it does not know all."
I found author Paul Coleman's advice on what makes I especially found a peaceful heart especially helpful,
"A peaceful heart:
1. Seeks simplicity, where life is not driven by either deprivation or accumulation.
2. Lets go of anxieties and false beliefs that we cling to as life preserves but that are actually fear preservers.
3. Knows that the things let go will cost little, that peace is compatible with a need to cling.
4. Looks within itself, without judgement. Therein lies a deeper understanding.
5. Makes peace with uncertainty; knows that it does not know all."
August 5, 2018
After reading Finding Peace When Your Heart Is In Pieces: A Step-by-Step Guide to the Other Side of Grief, Loss, and Pain, I feel that anyone could relate to the topics covered in the book. It deals not merely with a person's "heart in pieces" in the traditional sense of a broken heart, but in the broad and all-human experiences of grief, loss and pain (whether it be death, divorce, illness, addiction or another type of trauma.)
Dr. Coleman's words and examples of situations helped me declutter my mind of myths, confusion and cliches. They also provided clarity and food for thought regarding acceptance and higher/lower consciousness--which is vital to grasp in order to move beyond what is keeping you sad, angry, jealous, anxious (or other consuming emotions).
Using science (how the brain works, for example) and his own professional and human experience, Dr. Coleman explains the journey to transformation and enlightenment in a way that is relatable and compassionate. it makes sense out of what can seem "unfair" and senseless.
Think about it: the transformative, larger than life characters in myth or real history came into the world with "less than" or experienced extreme challenges. Despite their hardships they decide--or feel they have no other choice-- to accept their reality and embark on change. They take the journey and along the way do brave things, make huge sacrifices and impact others lives for the better. Harry Potter, King Arthur, Bilbo and Frodo Baggins, Eleanor Roosevelt, Martin Luther King Jr., Betty Ford, Gandhi, Temple Grandin, the Suffragettes, Pete Seeger come to mind--and countless "ordinary" people around us we're unaware of.
As the title suggests, this book guides you on how to find and make peace so that you can start a journey to self-transformation. If you give your suffering meaning and purpose, that will help you be happier, feel more fulfilled and develop as a person. It will also have a ripple effect and help others.
The process isn't easy, nor is it supposed to be. We have to face things and move forward to move beyond: this takes courage, higher consciousness, love, determination and a desire to be in a better place emotionally or physically. It's NOT easy to release victimhood, resentment, anger and disappointment when "it's not fair!" It's NOT easy to let go of the ego and surrender the emotional drain that's been getting you nowhere. It's NOT easy to accept a horrible truth or event as a real part of your history. But it is necessary in order to come out the other side. This is one of the most powerful things I culled from the book.
I'm sure many of us can relate to that in their own way, and that's the beauty of the book. When I read about the journey and examples of what to watch out for/what to embrace, I was able to better realize what holds me prisoner, makes me unhappy and anxious. I was able to see patterns and cause and effect. And believe it or not, I'm grateful in some strange way for some of the tragedies in my life...because I have seen myself become a more loving person: towards myself and others, even strangers. I may instinctively want to soothe or help others who are feeling pain and suffering. I want to get to know and relate to others. Connecting with others is easier now because feeling compassion and care for others makes it easier to approach and get to know or help others. And the more connected to others I feel, the less alone and more purposeful I feel.
I wrote notes and underlined sections that really spoke to me, and things I knew I would need to reread when in a tough situation or having a "relapse." You will find yourself asking questions and seeking wisdom about your pain and suffering in a productive, self-loving and empowering way.
Personally, this book inspired me (or sometimes prodded me) to test the waters outside imposed boundaries. For example, having a history of illness and surgeries, I considered my body to be a separate thing to blame--I didn't even want it to be attached to me. But accepting my past and even current physical issues, has allowed me to try new things and to live in the moment...and to live WITH my body. I took some tae kwon do classes! While challenging, it was empowering, fun and I was proud of my body. I can do some pretty mean snap kicks! Now I'm thinking about taking dance classes. Just little things like that can help shift the emphasis from negative to positive.
This is my long winded way to say : READ THE BOOK!
Dr. Coleman's words and examples of situations helped me declutter my mind of myths, confusion and cliches. They also provided clarity and food for thought regarding acceptance and higher/lower consciousness--which is vital to grasp in order to move beyond what is keeping you sad, angry, jealous, anxious (or other consuming emotions).
Using science (how the brain works, for example) and his own professional and human experience, Dr. Coleman explains the journey to transformation and enlightenment in a way that is relatable and compassionate. it makes sense out of what can seem "unfair" and senseless.
Think about it: the transformative, larger than life characters in myth or real history came into the world with "less than" or experienced extreme challenges. Despite their hardships they decide--or feel they have no other choice-- to accept their reality and embark on change. They take the journey and along the way do brave things, make huge sacrifices and impact others lives for the better. Harry Potter, King Arthur, Bilbo and Frodo Baggins, Eleanor Roosevelt, Martin Luther King Jr., Betty Ford, Gandhi, Temple Grandin, the Suffragettes, Pete Seeger come to mind--and countless "ordinary" people around us we're unaware of.
As the title suggests, this book guides you on how to find and make peace so that you can start a journey to self-transformation. If you give your suffering meaning and purpose, that will help you be happier, feel more fulfilled and develop as a person. It will also have a ripple effect and help others.
The process isn't easy, nor is it supposed to be. We have to face things and move forward to move beyond: this takes courage, higher consciousness, love, determination and a desire to be in a better place emotionally or physically. It's NOT easy to release victimhood, resentment, anger and disappointment when "it's not fair!" It's NOT easy to let go of the ego and surrender the emotional drain that's been getting you nowhere. It's NOT easy to accept a horrible truth or event as a real part of your history. But it is necessary in order to come out the other side. This is one of the most powerful things I culled from the book.
I'm sure many of us can relate to that in their own way, and that's the beauty of the book. When I read about the journey and examples of what to watch out for/what to embrace, I was able to better realize what holds me prisoner, makes me unhappy and anxious. I was able to see patterns and cause and effect. And believe it or not, I'm grateful in some strange way for some of the tragedies in my life...because I have seen myself become a more loving person: towards myself and others, even strangers. I may instinctively want to soothe or help others who are feeling pain and suffering. I want to get to know and relate to others. Connecting with others is easier now because feeling compassion and care for others makes it easier to approach and get to know or help others. And the more connected to others I feel, the less alone and more purposeful I feel.
I wrote notes and underlined sections that really spoke to me, and things I knew I would need to reread when in a tough situation or having a "relapse." You will find yourself asking questions and seeking wisdom about your pain and suffering in a productive, self-loving and empowering way.
Personally, this book inspired me (or sometimes prodded me) to test the waters outside imposed boundaries. For example, having a history of illness and surgeries, I considered my body to be a separate thing to blame--I didn't even want it to be attached to me. But accepting my past and even current physical issues, has allowed me to try new things and to live in the moment...and to live WITH my body. I took some tae kwon do classes! While challenging, it was empowering, fun and I was proud of my body. I can do some pretty mean snap kicks! Now I'm thinking about taking dance classes. Just little things like that can help shift the emphasis from negative to positive.
This is my long winded way to say : READ THE BOOK!
November 28, 2020
really helpful and insightful book
lots of strategies to help you along your healing journey from grief
lots of strategies to help you along your healing journey from grief
September 26, 2018
This book can self help it self step by step to my trash can, I will keep my issues rather then finish this book!
Read
November 22, 2017not for me; too 'spiritual' and formulaic.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews