Chasing Normal: Finding Love After Surviving Physical and Emotional Abuse

by Lisa Gerardy

One in four women and one in six men were sexually abused before age eighteen. Lisa was two. She was raised by a single, stressed-out, abusive mom, who worked full time and relied on government assistance and an abusive married boyfriend to get by. Because of this, Lisa never felt normal as a child so she chased the idea of having a normal family in her romantic relationships and friendships. In the end, Lisa discovers that she will never be normal and that is actually a good thing.

200 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 15, 2024

About the author

Lisa Gerardy is a writer, educator, and survivor with a gift for turning pain into prose. In her memoir, Chasing Normal: Finding Love After Surviving Physical and Emotional Abuse, Lisa opens up about her journey through a traumatic childhood and the winding path she took toward self-acceptance and love.

Reviews

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an advance review copy from BookSirens for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
It is appalling what abuse Lisa suffered, especially starting at age 2. She tells her story with honesty and doesn't hold back on talking about her bad relationships.

[Stacey · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book in one sitting. I have never encountered a memoir with this much honesty, heart, and humor.

I read a lot of memoirs and I expected that the author would be the hero of the story, but Lisa Gerardy has a gift for turning a spotlight on herself—her own embarrassments are here for all to see. No filter, no diffusion, no temporizing.

This approach helps the reader immerse in the world of Lisa’s childhood and the abuse and neglect she suffered. But it also brings the hope of healing and redemption. We are all flawed, and far too many of us are traumatized by events in our past. Chasing Normal tells us we can persevere in spite of it, heal, and get better.

Highly recommend. I’ve already read it twice.
It’s one of those gems I will keep coming back to.

[Lorraine Haataia · Rating 5 out of 5]

A Heartfelt, Honest, and Surprisingly Funny Memoir

I thoroughly enjoyed Chasing Normal by Lisa Gerardy for several reasons. First of all, it’s so clearly written and easy to follow. Each chapter starts with a year, which really helps you keep track of where you are in her life. I loved that — it made the whole story flow naturally.

It’s always interesting to see how other people grow up and what shapes them, and this book really made me appreciate my own upbringing, realizing there were many hardships I didn’t have to face as a child. There were definitely some areas I could relate to, and others that were totally different from my own experience. I enjoyed Lisa’s subtle humor throughout the book. You can tell that humor is her way of coping with some of the tough things that happened in her life — but she does it in such a positive way. Rather than complaining or playing the victim, she comes across as strong, stoic, and sarcastic in the best possible sense.

In fact, she sums herself up perfectly at the end of the acknowledgments when she writes, “Thanks to my mother, Janet, for making me the strong, stoic, sarcastic person that I am today.” That line says it all — and that’s exactly how she comes across in this memoir. With help from Fran along the way, Lisa is the hero of her own life, and her son’s life as well. Despite a difficult childhood and a lack of stability, she is admirable, resilient, and full of heart. There were quite a few scenes throughout the book where I wished I could step in and advise or rescue her.

I appreciated that she included photos — it made the people and events feel even more real. You can actually picture the faces of the people she talks about, especially key characters like John and Fran. I was amazed by how much she remembered from her childhood. Piecing all of that together — the details, the timeline, the emotions — must have taken a lot of reflection and effort.

I highly recommend this book, especially if you’ve ever experienced childhood trauma or instability. Even if you haven’t, it’s such a powerful read about resilience, growth, and the different ways people find strength. Lisa’s story has a hopeful, uplifting ending too — she meets Chris, her husband, who she fondly calls her “Prince” in the bio on the back of the book. She even leaves us with a little cliffhanger about what happens next, which is a great strategy to make us want to read more.

Overall, Chasing Normal is a fascinating, heartfelt, and sometimes funny story about surviving, growing, and finding love after hardship. Lisa’s honesty, innocence, and kind-hearted humor shine through every page.

[Lynn Van Antwerp · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a tragic true story of severe physical, emotional and sexual child abuse, starting at the very young age of two years old! In the recounting of these stories throughout her life, Lisa Gerardy shows her strength and perseverance to overcome her early trauma. She uses a sarcastic sense of humor to cope with the trials of everyday life and parenting, as well as the challenge of a complicated relationship with her primary abuser. She even turned it into material for her stand-up comedy shows!
As an adult, Lisa Gerardy has been able to be successful in her career and personal life despite the long-lasting impact of her childhood experiences. Her story shows the strength and resiliency of the human spirit! The positive influences in her life formed the basis of her ability to share her story. Focusing on her positive relationships, with humor and sarcasm, she shows how therapeutic the telling of her story can be.


*a free digital copy of the book was provided in exchange for an honest review

[Alessandro Di Sciascio · Rating 5 out of 5]

Have you seen the movie Titanic? There was a sense of dread because you KNEW the ship sinks in the end. This was kind of that in reverse. The only things that kept me reading as the catastrophes piled on were:
1. Lisa Gerardy's ability to color even the roughest things in humor
2. Knowing that she wrote the book and therefore it was unlikely I'd come to a chapter where it says that the author was accidentally dipped in acid and then fed to a shark.
I'm not going to spoil the plot for anyone but to give you an idea... most humans are fully potty-trained by age 3. Before hitting that milestone Lisa had gone through more and more severe trauma than I've gone in 53 years around the sun. So the title is clearly an earned badge.
Loved the book though there were so many heartbreaking moments... because I could remind myself "she's obviously out of that tunnel now as evidenced not just by the title but also by the great book"

[Sandra Carrion · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading Lisa’s telling of her childhood abuse was not an easy read. Since I too lived in Hollywood, Florida, as an adult, and a teacher at the school she would attend for HS, her use of the actual locales somehow made her story more painful to read.

Many times during the reading, I wanted to yell, why did no one see her pain? Why wasn’t anyone watching out for her? What did we all miss? How many Lisa’s sat in my classroom over a 40 year career?

But then Lisa wouldn’t be Lisa. She followed her own path to health and strength and each step took her to exactly where she is today- a beacon of resilience and hope that abuse can be survived and each of us can find our own normal.

A most worthy memoir to read even if a difficult road to share.

[Sasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lisa doesn’t shy away from showing her vulnerabilities. Her candidness pulls you into her world—laying bare her childhood abuse, hardships, mistakes, emotional scars and moments of shame. She does not sugarcoat her story or hold back many times using humor as a way to cope.

But more than just recounting the pain, Lisa's story is about growth, resilience, and ultimately, hope for love. Lisa shows that no matter how broken we may feel, we have the power to heal, find peace, and push forward. It's a reminder that we are all deserving of love.

[Angie :) · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was simply amazing. I loved the author’s sense of humor throughout the book.

I relate to a lot of the abuse that was discussed, but I have never seen it portrayed as beautifully as this book did. The writing style really connected with me, I felt so validated and understood.

This book was also arranged beautifully- I finished it in one sitting! I highly recommend it, this has become my favorite memoir.

*Disclaimer*
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Kathleen Markus · Rating 5 out of 5]

Chasing Normal-Finding Love After Surviving Physical and Emotional Abuse is a heart-wrenching yet uplifting memoir of a woman who endured unimaginable hardships. Her story is told with raw honesty and a sharp wit, turning what could have been a tale of sorrow into a story of survival, resilience, and the power of humor.

I loved this book because it’s not just a story of survival, but a celebration of the healing power of love, humor, and the human spirit.

[Kristin Elaina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a great read! As a child of the '70s and '80s, the back trip with so many period references was enjoyable. Even though this book deals with many foms of abuse, Ms. Gerardy's writing style, especially her humor, makes it easier to deal with such serious issues. She takes you on quite the journey, and you won't be disappointed where it ends for now.

[Allyson Langworth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Was a well written book and sharing her journey from childhood through to adulthood was fun, sad, anger producing.

The only downside of the book is some of the jumping backwards in certain spots.

Great read and overall easy read.

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Stephanie Habermehl-lisi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This memoir is fabulous! Very emotional to say the least. I felt like I was a bystander. I read this book in one sitting. Definitely looking forward to reading more of Lisa’s work.

[Kris · Rating 5 out of 5]

A story for survivors. You are not alone. Lisa is an inspiration!

[Liz · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a great read, easy and humerous. Growing up in Hollywood in the same time period brought back many childhood memories for myself. Would definitely recommend it.

[Theresa Eckert · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading Chasing Normal was very thought-provoking for me.  Lisa’s gift of writing takes us with her as she describes the years of intense emotional pain and abuse she endured.

Lisa’s genuine sense of humor and talented writing have helped her to cope in life. She was always looking for what she thought was the “normal.” This book is the story of perseverance.  
 
Blessed with sincere people who genuinely love her. They encouraged and supported her dreams of being a writer.  

I believe LOVE gave her the inner strength and a reason to keep moving forward with so much success. I greatly admire her strength, courage, humor and willingness to share her story with others. She is truly a gem of a person.