Probably Nothing

by Matilda Tristram

At 31, Matilda Tristram was 17 weeks pregnant and looking forward to having her first baby. Then she discovered she had cancer.

This touching and hilarious graphic memoir, which is never morose or self-pitying, starts at the moment Matilda was diagnosed and ends when her course of chemotherapy finishes in October 2013. Recording the awkward conversations, the highs and lows of treatment, the mixed blessings of receiving 'Get Well' cards, and the reality of still having to queue too long for croissants, Matilda captures her experiences with characteristic style and warmth. Along the way she cherishes the small details of life, and learns not to sweat the big things. Her beautiful and boisterous son was born without complications and is reliably keeping her up most nights.

Charming, witty and uplifting - this unique and beautifully illustrated book will leave you cherishing the good things in life, and ready to face your own challenges.

Will be enjoyed by readers of The Gigantic Beard That Was Evil by Stephen Collins, Fun Home by Alison Bechdel and Building Stories by Chris Ware.

Genres: Graphic Novels, Nonfiction, Memoir, Comics, Graphic Novels Comics, Biography

96 pages, Hardcover

First published August 7, 2014

Reviews

[jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

Just had to have a little cry at the end there!

A terribly sad but remarkably heartwarming graphic 'novel' (it's actually autobiographical), about Matilda dealing with a pregnancy and eventual motherhood, whilst tackling cancer and treatment.

'Probably Nothing' depicts a very emotional time period from Mathilda going through such a unique experience, that most will never be able to sympathise with, and obviously this read is understandably melancholic. But Matilda manages to maintain an inspiring, mostly optimistic attitude throughout, and the book is peppered with some genuinely hilarious moments of dark humour. A lot of these are in reference to what kind of beverage etc her shit most looks like, and how uninhibited she has become with her body after she's been through so much with it. I especially liked a great moment where her armpit and pubic hair starts to fall out, and she comments that it suggests she is no longer fighting the patriarchy.

The book is split into nine chapters, each signifying a new month, and is laid out in classic comic strip style. Mathilda talks us through doctors appointments, her therapy, trips to her parents house, days out, casual nights in eating pizza and lots more. You can tell that she was being very honest and raw, and some of the sentences, accompanied by their lovely drawings, really gripped my heart. She seemed to have a really awesome support network, and I really loved that her friends and family members seemed to try their upmost not to victimise her, and really appeared to remain as positive as possible.

All in all a really special story, and a book that I'm glad to own so I can revisit it in the future.

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’ve read an awful lot of cancer memoirs. This one is unique in that it’s in the form of a graphic novel. Tristram was 13 weeks pregnant when she went to the emergency room for persistent vomiting and stomach pain and was diagnosed with bowel cancer. She underwent surgery to remove a tumor and had six months of chemotherapy and a colostomy bag, all while trying to prepare for motherhood and then actually be a mother to baby James. It’s gently funny (“People say that having cancer makes them more peaceful and tolerant. I’m finding the opposite is true. I don’t know how long I’ve got left! Can’t waste time on these boring conversations!” and “I get touchy when people ask me too many questions. ‘So when will they reverse the colostomy?’ ‘I don’t know, I guess when everything else has settled down a bit.’ Would you normally ask someone about their arsehole so directly?”), but there’s a bit too much one-thing-after-another, and the drawing style emulates Roz Chast but looks more like a third grader’s output. (That sounds harsh. I’m sorry.) Anyway, Matilda Tristram is still alive! And teaches animation. So that’s good.

[Louise · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

A graphic memoir of pregnancy and cancer. Matilda Tristram was 15 weeks pregnant when she was unexpectedly diagnosed with bowel cancer. Probably Nothing describes her decisions about treatment, she chose to have chemotherapy and go forward with her pregnancy. Chemo while pregnant and with a new born really doesn't sound like fun, not that it ever sounds fun.

Matilda documents her daily experiences, and also the small things that she now notices that she wouldn't have seen before like the look of those heading to chemo - they're tired looking, wearing too many clothes and have stiff wigs.

Actually a lot of her joys seem somehow similar to lockdown/corona times of 2020. She starts making sourdough....

"Small things like eating grapes in the park seem significant these days."

"Suddenly cry on the bus, I think, because putting on makeup and going out for the evening is normal and fun, and it feels good to be doing normal, fun things again."

She even slips in wuthering as a word! I don't think I've seen that before.

[T C · Rating 3 out of 5]

Honest comic on a hard year of pregnancy while battling cancer. While describing very difficult times the author manages to include some comic parts and balance the hard stuff out with her observations of the small and bigger good things around her.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This story is written in small frames with a short caption for each frame. It ends up being small little observations of the author’s time having rectal cancer while pregnant and after birth. It’s poignant and beautiful. I found it really helpful in preparing for my rectal cancer treatment.

[Gaia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really liked this graphic memoir. It was touching and interesting.

[Nicola Robyn · Rating 3 out of 5]

Made me laugh. It does "slice of life" very well. I was getting a bit bored toward the end though.

[Shoshanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Never read a book with a story quite like this. I don't remember anymore where I learned about this (I thought it was from a Library Journal spotlight on Graphic Medicine, but I can't find that article anymore, maybe I dreamt that). Well reviewed on the official Graphic Medicine project website, by MK, the Graphic Nurse herself. The intersection of a cancer narrative and a pregnancy narrative, well really, her experience of both at the same time, was at some times quite harrowing and overwhelming. Lots of tears. Lots of swearing. Lots of waiting. But also lots of support from her boyfriend and family. This is an exemplar of the kind of comics that libraries should have if they are serious about developing Graphic Medicine collections that not only share experiences with those experiencing similar medical situations themselves, but broaden the scope of narrative you see in cancer narratives or pregnancy narratives, viewed on their own. Also, this takes place in the UK, so one not only learns more of the ins and outs of the National Health System, but one gets to hear British turns of phrase too. :)

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Matilda Tristram sent me her book, Probably Nothing: A Diary of not-your-average Nine Months, and it’s one of those books that begs to be finished in one sitting (I did it in two, but only because I had to tear myself away for something urgent – otherwise I could have chugged along without caring about the time!) It’s a graphic memoir that recounts her journey – from finding out she had cancer while she was pregnant at 17 weeks, to giving birth to James, and to the end of her chemotherapy. I loved it. It was honest, open, and incredibly real – I could imagine the things Matilda said in her head (you know, the things you wouldn’t say out loud!) I appreciated her humour and openess in expressing her thoughts, especially when she recounts her experience with people who mean well but could do better.

I had a chance to email her about the book, and I hope you enjoy reading the interview on my blog: http://www.pikaland.com/2015/02/10/pr...

[Lauracio · Rating 4 out of 5]

Matilda ci racconta uno stralcio della sua vita: alla 17esima settimana di gestazione scopre di avere un tumore all'intestino. Inizia un calvario: il dilemma su come procedere, le conseguenze fisiche e psichiche delle decisioni prese e delle terapie sopportate. Un marito premuroso e una rete amicale e familiare molto forte e il suo senso dell'umorismo hanno dato come frutto oltre allo stupendo James anche questa bella graphic novel, sincera talora dura, altre volte struggente e spesso anche divertente.

[Joseph Young · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not a huge fan of the art style. Book left me simultaneously wanting either more detail or less. Felt like this type of format doesn't do enough justice to this type of story.

To be honest, there were some parts where it seemed like the author was striking back in anger that resonated poorly with me. These were infrequent, but still triggered personal negative feelings in me due to my personal situation. Eg, most people probably would be fine with it and wouldn't have the same reaction I do to it.

[Claudia Hussain · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had to pace myself with this book - I found it uplifting and funny at times and totally honest and angry, despairing at others. A real emotional rollercoaster which was enhanced by the totally wonderful cartoon which accompanied the writing. The one tiny complaint was ..... I wanted more of the 'after', what happened once treatment finished, how did she feel?

[El · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tells the stoy, in comic book form, of Matilda Tristram's experience of bowel cancer and chemotherapy while pregnant with her first child. Poignant, funny, informative and life-affirming. It will change you.

[Hayley Butler · Rating 5 out of 5]

While the idea that it is a graphic book may put some off, this book explores the journey of Matilda as she deals with not only her pregnancy but also her cancer diagnosis and chemo. It isn't all serious but also focuses on the positives that happen during this difficult time.

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Honest, funny, emotional.

[Giskin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tristram was unlucky enough to be diagnosed with bowel cancer while pregnant. This visual diary documents her story which has a happy ending.

[Cynthia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Definitely a different format than anything else in the LRC! Touching story (graphic novel??) of a woman's concurrent pregnancy and cancer. Short read, good for a student who needs to fill a gap in their reading selective.