Stop Digging Your Own Grave : The ways we screw up our simple , serene and potentially successful lives

by Santhosh Sivaraj

Do this, do that, scale Everest, learn quantum physics—our lives are crammed with calls to be grander, better, and faster. Yet, here we are, the ambitious souls who might forget to turn off the gas stove while dreaming of our own startups. The quest for greatness is real, but so is forgetting to drink water and being cranky all day.

This book is your hilarious roadmap to navigating life’s silliest slip-ups. From purchasing a life planner with erasable pages at 3 AM to starting a diet every Monday (and ending it by Tuesday lunch), we’ve got a PhD in life’s little blunders. We are not climbing the ladders of success; we are usually on the wrong wall.

Great minds dish out advice—wake early, eat kale, seize the day! I am your anti-guru on a ‘what-not-to-do’ adventure. Life is not just about conquering impossible heights; it is also about dodging basic blunders. Avoiding these everyday screw-ups can make life easier, peaceful, and more successful. Let us laugh through and strike out our mistakes one by one and, in that process, become invincible eventually!

276 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 5, 2024

About the author

I believe in seeing with the mind , writing with the heart and living through others. This way I believe in living more life per life.

I believe in writing things simple and not simply. No matter what, every word ever written will resonate differently for different people based on their intelligence & imagination. My words are no exception.

I remember and quote the following words written by Author Ruskin Bond in one of his introduction.

Ruskin Bond

People often ask me why my style is so simple. It is, in fact, deceptively simple,
for no two sentences are really alike. It is clarity that I am striving to attain, not
simplicity.

‘When you talk you sound quite complicated,’ said a friend. And I had to explain
that I’ve spent forty years trying to simplify my style and clarify my thoughts!

Of course some people want literature to be difficult. And there are writers who
like to make their readers toil and sweat. They hope to be taken more seriously that
way. I have always tried to achieve a prose that is easy and conversational. And those
who think this is simple should try it for themselves.

Reviews

[Aakanksha · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best thing about this book? It's how you're able to connect with the story. It's like the author specially wrote it for me.
"Stop Digging Your Own Grave" talks about how we are our own enemies. How we overself sabotage our happiness and hamper our growth. An opportunity comes to your lap. You get scared and complicate your own success. Question can you even do it? Do you even deserve it? What if that happens, what if that happens? And this very book tries to put a full stop to your self-sabotaging tendencies..a book I needed this time.
It's also for the people who forget their own identities while pleasing other people's needs, which further leads to us facing the problems of anxiety and frustration Because we aren't being the person who we really are. It encourages us to confront those patterns, why we do it and how we can establish boundaries to save ourselves. And I like the writing style of the author as well. He brilliantly pens how we should prioritise our own needs and stop seeking validation from others. Realising you're enough and should focus on your growth...Self-love is really tough nowadays and this book can really help you with identifying the problems and working on them.
I highly recommend this to not only self-help genre lovers but to everyone who has lost themselves in this bustling life. It's not preachy and you'll find it yourself when you'll pick it up.

[Chanchal Vyas · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are someone who has an imposter syndrome, or someone who wants to lead a life as you planned but not able to turn those plans into reality; this book is for you. We are living in a world where we are constantly consumed in overseeing the perfect aspects of a person’s life on social media; we are swarmed with the thoughts of the perfect idea of a perfect life; and in this huddle of perfectionism, when we are not able to meet those unrealistic expectations set by our own mind, we take up to self hating. This book is a conversation to stop digging that grave of self sabotage for ourselves and start living a life full of self esteem, confidence and fullness.
It goes along with the story of a protagonist called Chinta, hence the reading experience becomes interesting. It doesn’t feel much like a non fiction tbh. And this is the closest to a perfect book that highlights utterly bitter truths of adult life. How we are programmed to behave, consume things, remain trapped in this cycle of consumerism; how our brains are rotting because we deal with extensively small amounts of critical thinking exercises, and immensely high amounts of readymade copy paste stuff.
10/10 read for me. Recommending it to everyone here as well 💯
Give it a read, you won’t regret it.

[KR · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Stop Digging Your Own Grave" is one of those books that makes you laugh at your own life while also making you think. It doesn’t throw impossible self-improvement goals at you or tell you to wake up at 5 AM to succeed. Instead, it talks about real struggles—forgetting where you kept your phone, convincing yourself you’ll start dieting on Monday, or getting lost in the endless loop of overthinking.

The book is refreshingly honest and brutally relatable. It doesn’t look down on ambition but shows how we often set ourselves up for failure by overcomplicating things. The writing feels like a conversation with a friend who just gets it, mixing humor with life lessons. I loved how it pointed out the little things we overlook—like how being “busy” all the time isn’t the same as being productive or how social media makes us chase unrealistic dreams.

Through simple yet powerful storytelling, it covers important aspects of life—money, relationships, happiness, and more. If you’ve ever felt like you’re running in circles trying to figure out adulthood, this book will make you feel seen.

[Bookish Simzz · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book doesn’t just tell you what to do; it effectively outlines what not to do. The author writes in a way that feels personal, as if the book is directly addressing you. I appreciated how the author highlights the many wrong choices we make in our daily lives. It's crucial to focus on these basic aspects of our routines.

One aspect of the book that felt somewhat excessive was the frequent use of comparative adjectives. While comparing concepts to everyday experiences can enhance understanding, it was overdone throughout the text. However, despite this minor flaw, the book is truly a gem.

The most compelling part of the book is the story of a boy named Chinta, whose wishes are granted by the magical Kalpa Tree—yet at the cost of sacrificing eight years of his life. By the end of Chinta’s story, I gained valuable insights into what we truly desire in life. For anyone seeking a fresh perspective on existence, this book is an absolute must-read.

[Priyanka M · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this book the author says that there are many gurus out there who are telling what to do so through this book the author wants to convey what not to do.

The best aspect of the book is the author's witty writing. It keeps you engaged to read throughout the book. I also liked that each chapter is short and straight to the point.

The title is very apt to the content book and actually is what made me curious about it's content.

After some point the content started being familiar so I would have liked the book more if the author shared something new.

Overall, a good pick if you wish to gain new perspective on many aspects of your daily life.

[Tarun Sen · Rating 5 out of 5]

📚 Book Review: *Stop Digging Your Own Grave*

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#Part 1: Book Details & Summary

1️⃣ Book Details:
- Title: Stop Digging Your Own Grave
- Author: Santhosh Sivaraj
- Genre: Self-Help / Personal Development
- Target Audience: Adults (particularly millennials and Gen Z navigating modern pressures)

2️⃣ Setting:
The book unfolds in a blend of real-world scenarios and allegorical storytelling. While grounded in contemporary life—think chaotic workdays, social media overwhelm, and late-night existential crises—it weaves in fictional elements like the mystical Kalpa Tree and a sage-like Sadhu. These contrasts highlight the tension between our daily grind and the quest for inner peace. The setting shifts between relatable modern chaos and reflective, almost philosophical dialogues, creating a dynamic backdrop that mirrors the reader’s own mental journey.

3️⃣ Main Characters:
- The Narrator/Protagonist: A voice that feels like your inner monologue—self-deprecating, witty, and disarmingly honest.
- Chinta: A character whose struggles with perfectionism and self-doubt mirror the reader’s own. His journey—like trading years of his life for fleeting wishes—serves as a cautionary tale.
- The Sadhu: A wise, enigmatic figure who dispenses hard truths with a side of humor, acting as a guide through the protagonist’s (and reader’s) existential fog.
These characters are deeply relatable, especially for anyone who’s ever overthought a text message or sabotaged their own goals. Chinta’s arc, in particular, evolves from desperation to self-awareness, making his story a standout.

4️⃣ Plot and Problem Area:
The book tackles the universal struggle of self-sabotage—how we overcomplicate opportunities, cling to toxic habits, and drown in comparison culture. Through a mix of humorous anecdotes (like 3 AM productivity obsessions) and poignant parables (Chinta’s bargain with the Kalpa Tree), Sivaraj dissects why we’re often our own worst enemies. The plot isn’t linear but cyclical, mimicking the repetitive nature of self-defeating behaviors, before building toward a resolution rooted in self-compassion. Major twists include revelations about how “busyness” masks avoidance and why chasing “perfect” is a losing game.

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#Part 2: My Opinion

1️⃣ Strengths/Things I Liked Most:
- Unflinching Relatability: The book’s power lies in its ability to mirror your own life. Scenes like doomscrolling instead of sleeping or over-apologizing for existing will make you gasp, “How did he know?!”
- Tone: Sivaraj’s writing is a masterclass in balancing humor and heart. It’s like having coffee with a friend who roasts your bad habits but hands you a Kleenex when you need it.
- Structure: The dialogue-driven format (especially the protagonist’s exchanges with the Sadhu) keeps the lessons fresh, avoiding the dryness of traditional self-help.
- Quotes: “You can’t pour from an empty cup—especially if you’ve thrown the cup at someone’s head in frustration.”

2️⃣ Weaknesses/Things I Didn't Like:
- Metaphor Overload:While creative, some analogies (e.g., comparing self-doubt to a “Wi-Fi signal for negativity”) feel stretched.
- Ambiguity in Solutions: The book excels at diagnosing problems but occasionally skimps on step-by-step fixes. A chapter with actionable checklists would’ve been gold.
- Repetition: Themes like “stop overthinking” recur heavily, which drives the point home but risks redundancy.

3️⃣ Message/Theme:
At its core, the book screams: “Your worth isn’t a to-do list.” It dismantles the myth of perfectionism, urging readers to ditch the “shoulds” and embrace “good enough.” Themes of boundary-setting, self-trust, and the dangers of conflating productivity with value resonate deeply in our burnout culture.

4️⃣ Author's Writing Style:
Sivaraj’s prose is 'approachable yet vivid'—think neon-lit anecdotes about modern absurdity paired with quiet, reflective moments. His dialogue crackles with authenticity, and his use of humor as a Trojan horse for hard truths (e.g., comparing self-sabotage to “ordering a salad with a side of regret”) keeps the tone uplifting.

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#Part 3: Conclusion

1️⃣ My Opinion with Reasons:
This book felt like a mirror held up to my worst habits—uncomfortable but necessary. It doesn’t sugarcoat the work required to change, but it makes the journey feel less lonely. While I’d have loved more concrete strategies, its raw honesty and wit set it apart from preachier self-help guides. I’ll absolutely read Sivaraj’s future works.

2️⃣ Final Verdict:
Recommend?: YES—especially to serial overthinkers, people-pleasers, and anyone who’s ever canceled plans to binge-watch Netflix *and* hate themselves for it. Its cultural relevance (social media critiques, hustle culture takedowns) makes it a modern essential. Post-read, I felt equal parts motivated and comforted—a rare combo.

3️⃣ Rating of the Book:
4.5/5 ⭐
- Plot/Structure: 4/5 (Creative but occasionally meandering)
- Characters/Themes:** 5/5 (Chinta’s story alone is worth the read)
- Writing Style: 4.5/5 (Hilarious and heartfelt, minus a few overwrought metaphors)

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#Bonus Elements

📖 Memorable Quotes:
- “You’re not failing at life; you’re just using the wrong measuring stick.”
- “Self-care isn’t a scented candle—it’s saying ‘no’ without apology.”

🎨 Cover Analysis:
The cover—a signal showing “STOP”—cleverly visualizes the title’s metaphor. The muted earth tones contrast with bold typography, symbolizing growth through simplicity.

📈 Emotional Impact:
Equal parts laugh-out-loud funny and tear-jerkingly introspective. The Kalpa Tree parable left me staring at the wall for 10 minutes.

💬 Comparison:
Imagine *Atomic Habits* meets *Hyperbole and a Half*—practical wisdom wrapped in meme-worthy humor.

📚 Recommendation
Gift this to the burnt-out coworker, the friend who apologizes for existing, or yourself on a Sunday night before another chaotic week.

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💡 Final Thoughts:
*Stop Digging Your Own Grave* isn’t a life raft—it’s a friend tossing you a shovel and saying, “Let’s build higher ground together.” A must-read for anyone tired of tripping over their own feet. 🌟

[Sameer Gudhate · Rating 4 out of 5]

Have you ever had one of those days where it feels like everything is conspiring against you? Picture this: you’re rushing to finish a project, only to spill coffee all over your notes. That chaos perfectly captures the essence of Santhosh Sivaraj’s Stop Digging Your Own Grave. This book is more than just a humorous look at life’s blunders; it’s a relatable guide for anyone feeling overwhelmed in a world that often feels too fast-paced and demanding. Sivaraj, with his sharp wit and down-to-earth observations, invites us to laugh at ourselves while reflecting on our daily struggles.

In this book, Sivaraj navigates the tangled web of modern life, where we are inundated with pressure to be grander, better, and faster. His narrative explores the relatable yet absurd situations we find ourselves in, from buying a life planner at 3 AM to the perennial cycle of dieting that begins every Monday. The heart of the book lies in its exploration of our ambition versus the reality of our everyday slip-ups, making it a refreshing take on self-improvement that stands apart from traditional guides.

Sivaraj’s writing style is engaging and conversational, creating an inviting atmosphere that feels like a chat with a close friend. His prose is laced with humor, making it easy to connect with his experiences. I particularly enjoyed his knack for vivid descriptions that bring even the most mundane situations to life, making them both relatable and entertaining. It’s this blend of humor and authenticity that keeps readers turning the pages, eager to see what hilarious mishap he’ll recount next.

While this book doesn’t focus on traditional characters, the ideas presented are relatable figures in their own right. Sivaraj’s reflections on our collective struggles highlight the absurdities of modern life, showcasing our shared experiences. He delves into the complexity of human behavior, illustrating how our relentless pursuit of success often leads to overlooking the basics—like drinking water or getting enough sleep. These insights resonate deeply, reminding us of our common humanity.

The structure of the book is well-organized, with each chapter addressing a specific blunder or life lesson. Sivaraj maintains a lively pace, keeping readers engaged with his humorous anecdotes and insightful commentary. The chapters flow seamlessly into one another, creating a cohesive narrative that makes the book easy to digest. This organizational style enhances the overall reading experience, allowing us to reflect on our own lives without feeling overwhelmed.

Underlying the humor are profound themes about the pressures of modern life and the importance of self-care. Sivaraj adeptly highlights the need to balance ambition with the essentials of daily living, making a strong case for embracing our imperfections. His message resonates with real-world issues, reminding us that success is not solely defined by our achievements but also by our ability to navigate life’s ups and downs with grace and humor.

As I read Stop Digging Your Own Grave, I found myself moving through a spectrum of emotions—from laughter to introspection. Sivaraj’s relatable anecdotes prompted me to reflect on my own life choices and the humorous missteps I’ve experienced along the way. There were moments that felt like gentle nudges, encouraging me to reassess my priorities and to find joy in the chaos, which added a layer of emotional depth to the reading experience.

One of the book’s greatest strengths is its ability to blend humor with insightful commentary. Sivaraj’s character development, although not traditional, shines through in the way he portrays the relatable struggles we all face. His storytelling is compelling, with specific examples that resonate deeply, like the relatable tale of starting a diet only to abandon it just a day later. These moments not only entertain but also create a sense of camaraderie among readers.

While I thoroughly enjoyed the book, I believe it could benefit from deeper exploration of actionable advice related to the blunders discussed. A few practical tips on how to overcome these everyday challenges could enhance the overall message, providing readers with tangible takeaways to implement in their own lives. It would be great to see Sivaraj expand on this in future works.

Personally, Stop Digging Your Own Grave resonated with me on many levels. It reminded me that it’s okay to stumble through life and that embracing our mistakes can lead to growth. I found myself reflecting on my own humorous mishaps and feeling comforted by the shared experience of imperfection. The book felt like a warm hug on a chaotic day, reminding me that I’m not alone in my struggles.

In summary, Santhosh Sivaraj’s Stop Digging Your Own Grave is a delightful exploration of life’s blunders wrapped in humor and relatable insights. I wholeheartedly recommend this book to anyone looking for a good laugh while gaining perspective on the importance of self-acceptance. It’s a refreshing reminder that perfection is overrated, and sometimes, the best way to navigate life is to embrace our flaws and learn to laugh at ourselves. I look forward to seeing what Sivaraj brings us next!

#LifeLessons #HumorInLife #SelfImprovement #RelatableReads

[Aditya Anand · Rating 4 out of 5]

Santhosh Sivaraj’s Stop Digging Your Own Grave is a candid and insightful self-help book that lays out the common pitfalls one should avoid, to achieve success and live a more fulfilling life. Unlike many self-improvement books that take a direct instructional approach, Sivaraj presents his wisdom through an engaging narrative. The book unfolds as an interaction between the protagonist and a wise sadhu, with each conversation offering valuable life lessons. This dialogue-driven format makes the book a compelling read, as it feels less like a lecture and more like a deep conversation filled with insights, anecdotes, and practical takeaways.

At its core, the book focuses on six major themes - success, relationships, the mind, the body, happiness, and death. Each chapter is structured around one of these fundamental aspects of life, making it easier for readers to grasp the key ideas and apply them to their own experiences. Topics such as willpower, stress management, overthinking, and perfectionism are addressed with a no-nonsense attitude, reflecting Sivaraj’s straightforward and unapologetic style. His tone is refreshingly blunt, yet his insights are peppered with humor and relatable metaphors, preventing the book from feeling overly preachy.

Described by the author as a ‘hilarious roadmap’ book does not aim to glorify the pursuit of greatness but rather to highlight the everyday blunders and missteps that often trip us up. In our quest for greatness, we often forget the simplest things—something as basic as drinking enough water! Sivaraj calls out these common oversights with wit and wisdom, making his lessons not only instructive but also entertaining. More than a book on what to do, this is a ‘what-not-to-do guide’- a manual on how to dodge basic blunders and avoid everyday screw-ups.

Another highlight of the book is its structured approach to learning. Each chapter ends in a concise summary of the major takeaways, making it easier for readers to revisit the essential points without having to go through the entire chapter again. This feature is particularly useful for those who prefer quick, actionable insights rather than lengthy, theoretical discussions.

Sivaraj’s storytelling skills add another layer of engagement to the book. The dialogue between the protagonist and the sadhu is filled with wit, making the lessons feel natural rather than forced. His writing is accessible, making the book appealing to both avid readers of self-help literature and those new to the genre. The wisdom imparted is practical and grounded in real-life challenges, ensuring that readers find it applicable to their personal and professional lives.

Overall, Stop Digging Your Own Grave is an engaging and thought-provoking read that offers direct, impactful lessons on leading a better life. With its conversational tone, sharp insights, and well-structured format, it serves as a practical guide for anyone looking to break free from self-imposed limitations and cultivate a mindset for success. Whether you’re struggling with stress, perfectionism, or self-doubt, Sivaraj provides the tools and wisdom needed to navigate life’s challenges with clarity and confidence - all while ensuring you don’t forget to drink enough water!

[thebookaliciousgirl · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm not a fan of non-fiction, but sometimes you reach a point where fiction won't help you overcome your situation, but non-fiction will. I picked up this book during my slow and depressed days, when I was stuck with a lot of work and couldn't find the motivation to move forward. And trust me, this book pulled me out of it. I finished reading it in just five days, as I was so invested in the book.

This book is more than just a humorous look at life's troubles; it's a relatable guide for anyone feeling overwhelmed, low, stressed, or depressed in today's fast-paced world. I loved how the author narrated everything in a conversational tone, like a person you know or an elder brother. Some of his talks even made me laugh out loud. His writing style is engaging and conversational, making it feel like a chat with a best friend.

To be honest, I've tried reading a few motivational books before and felt bored, but I didn't feel bored with this one. It's the third motivational book I've finished, and I'm proud of it. As I turned the pages, I found myself nodding in agreement because it was so relatable.

The author's stories are vivid and relatable, making it easy to connect with his experiences. The book resonated with me completely, as it highlighted the importance of living in the moment and enjoying life, rather than struggling with everything on our own. It's the perfect guide to help you overcome your worries and teach you to live in the present, rather than worrying about the past or future.

The author's portrayal of relatable struggles shines through in his frank storytelling. His examples are specific and resonate deeply with readers. The author truly motivated me and taught me a lot about life through his relatable teachings, helping me reflect on my own life choices and humorous missteps.

The book emphasizes that no human is perfect, and everyone has their own unique way, so we should never try to prove ourselves to others. Instead, we should focus on being our own main character.

Overall, this is a delightful exploration of life's blunders wrapped in relatable humor and life hacks. I wholeheartedly recommend this book to anyone looking for a good laugh while gaining perspective on the importance of self-acceptance and resilience. This book talks about dealing with and overcoming overthinking, depression, stress, anxiety, relationships struggles, negative thoughts, fear, and addictions. It's about how to stop the negative and start the positive, but in a different way. And it's also a refreshing reminder that perfection is overrated, and sometimes, the best way to navigate life is to embrace our flaws and learn to laugh at ourselves. If you're not a fan of self-help books, trust me, you'll become one after reading this book.

Rating:- 5/5 ⭐

[Gaurav Jaiswal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stop Digging Your Own Grave" by Santhosh Sivaraj is a compelling self-help book that delves into the myriad ways individuals inadvertently complicate their lives through self-sabotaging behaviors. Santhosh Sivaraj is a multifaceted individual with a diverse professional background, including roles as a sailor, teacher, entrepreneur, banker, and mind trainer. This rich tapestry of experiences informs his writing, allowing him to connect with readers from various walks of life. He is also known for his engaging storytelling and insightful observations, offers readers a humorous yet profound exploration of these common pitfalls, guiding them toward a more serene and successful existence.

The book delves into the myriad ways individuals inadvertently complicate their lives, from procrastination and poor planning to the relentless pursuit of unrealistic goals. It is structured around the concept that in our pursuit of grand achievements, we often overlook simple mistakes that hinder our progress. Sivaraj emphasizes that while ambition is commendable, it's equally important to be mindful of the small mistakes that can derail our progress. He uses vivid descriptions and real-life scenarios to illustrate these points, making the content both engaging and relatable.

Sivaraj emphasizes the importance of mindfulness in our daily routines. He suggests that by paying attention to small actions, we can prevent larger issues from arising. He also employs humor as a tool for self-reflection, encouraging readers to laugh at their own mistakes and view them as opportunities for growth. Beyond humor, the book offers practical advice on how to recognize and rectify self-sabotaging behaviors, making it a useful guide for personal development. His prose is laced with humor, making it easy to connect with his experiences. This blend of wit and authenticity keeps readers turning the pages, eager to see what hilarious mishap he'll recount next.

It is characterized by a writing style that is both humorous and conversational, making complex life lessons accessible and engaging. Sivaraj employs relatable anecdotes and a witty narrative to connect with readers, encouraging self-reflection without the heaviness often associated with self-help literature. The pacing of the book is dynamic, with concise chapters that maintain reader interest and facilitate quick comprehension of key concepts. This structure allows readers to easily digest the material, making it suitable for both extended reading sessions and brief, casual engagements.

In conclusion it serves as a gentle reminder that while ambition drives us toward greatness, it's the mindful management of our daily actions that truly paves the way to success. Sivaraj's unique blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and practical advice makes this book a valuable addition to anyone's personal development journey.

[Ashima Bansal · Rating 5 out of 5]

💭 “The biggest enemy in your life is often you.”

Stop Digging Your Own Grave by Santhosh Sivaraj is not a typical self help book, it’s equal parts brutal truth, humor, and practical wisdom which is perfect for anyone feeling stuck, frustrated, or in need of a mindset shift. Self-help books can be heavy, but this one keeps it light, witty, and brutally relatable. You’ll be nodding, laughing, and occasionally crying at how accurately it describes your life choices.


Sivaraj’s engaging and conversational style makes this book feel like a fun, eye-opening conversation with a friend who tells you the truth but keeps you laughing along the way. His knack for storytelling brings even the most ordinary moments to life, making this a self-help book that doesn’t feel preachy—but still makes you think. The book is well-structured, with each chapter tackling a specific blunder or life lesson—keeping the narrative engaging, fun, and easy to digest.

One of the biggest strengths of Stop Digging Your Own Grave is how it transforms everyday frustrations into moments of connection. Whether it’s the cycle of starting a diet on Monday and quitting by Tuesday or making overly ambitious plans at 3 AM or the guilt of taking a break Sivaraj’s writing resonates deeply, making you feel like you’re not alone in your chaos, so you’ll be chuckling as you realize oh no, he’s talking about me. Sivaraj doesn’t pretend to have all the answers. Instead, he shares his own struggles and lessons, making this read feel like an honest, hilarious conversation rather than a lecture.

My favourite theme of Stop Digging Your Own Grave is its emphasis on boundaries, self-identity, and self-care. In a world where we’re constantly trying to meet others' expectations, it’s easy to lose ourselves in the process. Sivaraj reminds us that prioritizing our well-being isn’t selfish—it’s essential.

⭐ Final Thoughts:
If you’ve ever put yourself last and felt exhausted because of it, this book is your sign to stop and prioritize YOU. It’s a fun, thought-provoking read that reminds us to embrace self-care, set boundaries, and stop making life harder than it needs to be because let’s be honest—most of us are just winging adulthood while hoping for the best. Mistakes are inevitable, perfection is overrated, and life is meant to be lived, not just survived.

Stop Digging Your Own Grave is hilarious, relatable, and packed with wisdom. It will put a smile on your face while teaching you to stop overthinking, start living, and enjoy the chaos along the way. If you’ve ever felt like you’re just figuring things out one mistake at a time, this book is definitely for you.

[Padmajha [PJ] Me and My Bookshelf · Rating 4 out of 5]

The intriguing title and tagline immediately caught my attention, making me curious about what the book had to offer. With sharp wit and down-to-earth observations, the author invites readers to laugh while reflecting on the absurdities of daily struggles.
Stop Digging Your Own Grave is more than just a humorous take on life’s everyday blunders—it’s a relatable and engaging guide for anyone overwhelmed by modern life's fast-paced, demanding nature.
The book’s conversational and engaging writing style makes it feel like a friendly chat rather than a self-help guide. The author’s knack for storytelling, vivid descriptions, and humor brings even the most mundane situations to life, making them both entertaining and thought-provoking. His ability to blend humor with insight keeps readers engaged and eager to see what relatable mishap he’ll recount next.
While the book doesn’t follow a traditional narrative with characters, the ideas presented are relatable figures in their own right. Sivaraj explores common struggles—overthinking, overspending, dieting failures, and the relentless pursuit of success—while subtly reminding readers to focus on the essentials, like self-care and balance. His reflections highlight how natural these mistakes feel when we make them ourselves, but seeing them unfold in his anecdotes helps bring our thought patterns into perspective.
The structure of the book is well-organized, with each chapter tackling a specific blunder or life lesson. Each chapter also includes a takeaway section that summarizes key points, along with thought-provoking quotes and catchy subheadings that keep things interesting.
One of the book’s strengths is its ability to mix humor with meaningful insights. The author doesn’t just entertain—he also provides valuable advice on practical topics like smart investing, managing expenses, overcoming overthinking, and improving lifestyle habits. While the advice may not be groundbreaking, it serves as a timely reminder of things we often know but fail to implement in our lives.
Reading this book was both fun and introspective. It made me laugh, reflect, and even rethink some of my daily habits. The anecdotes create a sense of camaraderie, making readers feel less alone in their imperfections. The message is clear: Life is messy, and that’s okay. By recognizing and avoiding the everyday pitfalls, we can make life a little easier, more peaceful, and ultimately more fulfilling.
This is a light, entertaining, and insightful read—perfect for anyone looking for a refreshing take on self-improvement, filled with humor and practical wisdom.

[Khushi Sunderka · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐ What attracted me towards this book?

The cover and the title offcourse!

Even though we're always cautioned not to pick up a book based just on its cover, the mere sight of it excites our hearts (Dil hai ki Manta nahi :)
Honestly, when I saw the cover and the title, it seems like a warning signal, something highly informative to me. So, I picked this book up right away. Additionally, my interest in this book grew as I read it more.


⭐ The uniqueness of this book:

The uniqueness of this book was the way in which the author has written this book.

I loved how the author has cleverly explained our real life in a humorous and interesting way, the reader can't feel bored and it feels like just a conversation rather than a read. I loved how he highlighted his personal thoughts boldly.

One particularly noteworthy lesson was the value of acknowledging minor accomplishments, which are sometimes overlooked in favour of larger ones. These instances merit acknowledgement for their influence on our path.


⭐ About the book:

"Stop Digging Your Own Grave" is an engaging and informative trip into the world of cognitive development.

The central idea of the book is "creating your own downfall" a metaphor used by Sivaraj to illustrate the unconscious choices people make that lead to self-harm. Unhealthy habits, constrictive thinking, or poisonous relationships can all cause this harm. The main takeaway is that a lot of people unwittingly fuel their own misery and difficulties via fear, insecurity, or ignorance.

The book does a great job of demystifying complex ideas so that readers from a variety of backgrounds may understand them.

Through useful exercises and activities intended to promote personal development, "Stop Digging Your Own Grave" empowers readers in addition to informing them.

The author gives readers the resources they need to start a path of self-discovery and cognitive improvement, from striking up interesting conversations to taking up new interests.

However, I thought other sections, such as Chinta's story, were a little unclear and unrelated to the book's central idea. Although others may perceive these passages differently, they interfered with my reading flow and engagement.


⭐ My Recommendations:

"Stop Digging Your Own Grave" is an essential read for anyone looking to improve their capacity for critical thought, encourage creativity, and break free from cognitive stagnation.

For individuals who are ready to realise their greatest potential, this book is a beacon of wisdom.

[Amritha Kailesh · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stop Digging Your Own Grave is not your typical self-help book. It doesn’t push you to hustle harder or drown you in motivational clichés. Instead, Santhosh Sivaraj takes a refreshingly different approach—he doesn’t tell you what to do, but rather, what to stop doing.

At its core, the book is a humorous yet eye-opening exploration of self-sabotage—the little (and big) ways we get in our own way. Whether it’s procrastination, overthinking, people-pleasing, or mindless habits that drain our energy, Sivaraj dissects these behaviors with wit and relatability. Reading this book feels like sitting down with a friend who knows exactly what you’re going through and isn’t afraid to call you out—gently, but effectively.

What makes this book stand out is the engaging storytelling. Instead of overwhelming readers with theories and frameworks, Sivaraj weaves personal anecdotes, real-life examples, and humor into his writing. You’ll find yourself nodding along, thinking, Yep, I do that too. His conversational style makes even complex psychological patterns feel digestible and easy to reflect on.

A key highlight of the book is its focus on boundaries and self-identity. It speaks directly to those who lose themselves while trying to meet others’ expectations, leading to anxiety and frustration. Sivaraj reminds us that prioritizing ourselves isn’t selfish—it’s essential. His insights encourage self-awareness and mindfulness, helping readers shift their mindset from self-doubt to self-compassion.

The structure of the book also deserves praise. Each chapter breaks down a common self-sabotaging habit, and the concise takeaways at the end serve as a great reinforcement of key lessons. Unlike many self-help books that can feel preachy or repetitive, this one keeps things crisp, direct, and engaging.

Final Verdict

Stop Digging Your Own Grave is a must-read for anyone feeling stuck in life’s chaos, whether or not you typically reach for self-help books. With its relatable storytelling, practical wisdom, and refreshing humor, it serves as both a wake-up call and a guide to a more intentional life. If you’re looking for a book that will make you laugh, reflect, and genuinely rethink your habits, this one should be on your list.

[DarkFantasyReviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Stop Digging Your Own Grave" by Santhosh Sivaraj is an insightful and entertaining book on how we unknowingly complicate our lives. The book investigates the daily mistakes and self-defeating habits that hinder us from having a peaceful and prosperous life. By means of engaging anecdotes and keen observations, Sivaraj takes readers on a discovery of self-consciousness and personal development. The story is based on everyday life situations, with practical tips and witty observations on how to live life wisely and graciously.

Though "Stop Digging Your Own Grave" is a non-fiction book, the author's writing style ensures the character and situations come alive. The writer also puts to good use the attributes of humor and wit to produce characters like Chinta and situations that are easy to relate to and remember. The reader themselves become the protagonist in this instance as they go through the transformation and self-discovery process. The author's power to engage the reader on a personal level makes the book all the more impactful.

Santhosh Sivaraj's writing is eloquent yet easy to read, and he makes it simple to grasp even the most complicated ideas and apply them. The use of humor and everyday examples by the author gives the book a light-hearted feel, and it is a pleasure to read. The author's friendly tone and interesting storytelling make readers interested in the book from cover to cover. The book is well structured, with every chapter dealing with a particular aspect of self-sabotage and providing real-life solutions.

I strongly suggest "Stop Digging Your Own Grave" to anyone looking for practical guidance on personal development and self-improvement. Whether you want to overcome certain obstacles or just live a more aware and successful life, this book provides useful information and techniques. The author's easy-to-read style and everyday examples make it a fun and educational read for anyone who is interested in self-help and personal development. So grab your copy today guys and you will definitely enjoy reading it as much as I did.

[Nilofar Yasmin · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Nothing in life has meaning unless you decide to give it meaning. Nothing is truly real or unreal. Even this life is like your dream-it'll fade away someday. The only thing we can do is create as many wonderful memories as we can, for as long as we can."
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Have you ever realized that our mind can be our biggest opponent, if we do not allow it to grow and be open for possibilities. Our self destructive thoughts and self talks can mend our mind into thinking the worst possible outcome of our lives. And hence, we become successful in digging our own graves.
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This book has done a simple pee a book entry through my life, and boom, it shifted my entire perspective on life. And no, with this book, you are not going to die under the weight of the words. But yes, this is a self help book, giving you all the vibes of a probable last bencher's advice. Because you are going to laugh your hearts out and at the same time you will be staring at the wall introspecting life.
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And let me introduce you all with the exact version of you- Chintamani. He is always surrounded by hardships, and all he wants is money, success and overall happiness. Even after fulfilling his desires, he is never happy and wants more from life. Throughout his life he kept chasing them only to realize at the end that it's all an illusion. His whole life has been a lie??
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I loved and enjoyed reading this book because I truly believe, the author got some super power to sneak into my life and present it to the world to read. It was hilarious, thoughtful and every single line has been a reality check for me. The book emphasized on doing simple tasks, and finding joy in doing them. We don't have to manage mammoth tasks to call ourselves as successful. It touched every little and major aspects of life such as money, time, relationships, mind, body, diet etc.
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And not to miss the exceptional writing style of the author. The author took the part of speech 'simile and metaphor' to the next level. I'm recommending this book to my friends who already are master overthinkers.

[noorthebookworm · Rating 4 out of 5]

Santhosh Sivaraj, the author, says avoiding certain everyday screw-ups can make life easier, peaceful, and more successful.

He chose to write a book not in the standard way, as a self help book, giving a list of things we should do. Instead he chose to take up the non- traditional way, the path less travelled, telling us the things not to do, in our day-to-day life to help make life less complex. (कान सीधे हाथ से नहीं पर उल्टे हाथ से पकड़ना। )

There's a lot to learn in this 256 page book. •Starting with, the cover is simple yet it conveys the message very clearly. Even the spine has a small icon showing supposedly mud and a spade. The paper quality is good, so much so that my annotations and highlight done with a highlighter donot message up the back of the page & ruin it.
•The punch/ tag line is very catchy & appropriate;
"The ways we screw up our simple, serene and potentially successful lives."
•There are total of 29 Chapters & it gets better with every page. The author doesnot beat around the bush & is very straight with his message & the language is sarcastic humour on a roll. The vocabulary is pretty simple & it feels like you are either attending a lecture by the author or having a chit- chat with him.
•The book is weaved in the form of a story around a boy named Chinta Mani, plus there are independent chapters on the context, point in discussion. The chapters are short & effective to keep the attention span & end with highlight worthy takeaways.
•Few of my favourite takeaways are;
Any person capable of angering you becomes your master.
Happiness hack: help someone out. It's free & doesn't require batteries.
Instant gratification is like skipping straight to dessert & realising you have ruined your appetite for the main course.
•The ending was my favourite part & it was so simple, the life lesson, that I literally guffawed at myself & it reitirated the point that the author laughs at his own mistakes & loves life unconditionally.

P.s. Don't miss the blurb & about the author section

[Akanksha Reads · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a truth of every day living of a human so relatable and existing.
Author brings to readers A GUIDE for 'what not-to-do' things so that we can simply live without tension over burdened on shoulders unnecessarily.
From the preface to the end page of this book, I was agreeing to author's perception about each and every thing described within the book through stories and examples and values and lessons.
A few chapters made a memorable remark on my mind, one is Chapter 7. STOP BECOMING EXTRAORDINARY, where authors explaination is valid about Being You , and not the version of anyone is masterpiece like a few other ones in the book,
A few lines from book are:
Growth is about embracing change, even when it means contradicting your past self. It's like being in a dance where the steps keeps changing- you have to stay on your toes. If you're not where you want to be, it's often because there's something you haven't learned yet.
•Chapter 15: STOP OVERTHINKING, here a quote steal my attention and stick over my head, "The real difference lies in our capacity to live in an imagined world. " By ROBIN DUNBAR, the entire quote and the chapter is marvelously beautiful trying to say that, thinking and worrying is a problem we all face and everything to us seems puzzled about WHAT WE WANT?


He asks people to be real and not transfer hate to anybody.
According to him, we must think of universe as a helpful genie from the law of attraction. But you must be clear of your wishes.

This book to me was an exploration and make me understood the real meaning of power, success, health, food, wisdom and intelligence and lot more realistic practical beliefs we must have attention towards. His book will leave an impact on you, dear reader I think and I believe it is a guide we needed for so long, but the time is right and we have it here.

I recommend this guide for all who are willing to live their life with clear visions and ideas practically right for mindful and peaceful living.

Rating-5/5

Happy reading

[Rutvi Koul · Rating 4 out of 5]

Santhosh Sivaraj's "Stop Digging Your Own Grave" is a thought-provoking and enjoyable book about how we unintentionally make our life more difficult. The book explores the everyday errors and counterproductive behaviors that prevent us from leading contented and successful lives. Sivaraj leads readers on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth through captivating tales and astute observations. The narrative is based on real-life events and offers insightful advice and humorous reflections on how to live a kind and sensible existence.
Despite being a work of non-fiction, the author's writing style makes the settings and characters in "Stop Digging Your Own Grave" come to life. In order to create relatable and memorable events and people like Chinta, the author also skillfully employs comedy and wit. In this case, the reader becomes the protagonist as they undergo the process of self-discovery and metamorphosis. The book's impact is increased by the author's ability to connect with the reader on a personal level.
Even the most complex concepts are easy to understand and apply thanks to Santhosh Sivaraj's eloquent yet approachable language. The book has a fun tone and is enjoyable to read because of the author's use of comedy and real-world situations. Readers are drawn into the book from beginning to end by the author's approachable style and captivating narrative. The book is organized effectively, with each chapter addressing a distinct facet of self-sabotage and offering practical remedies.
I highly recommend "Stop Digging Your Own Grave" to anyone seeking helpful advice on self-improvement and personal growth. This book offers helpful tips and strategies for overcoming specific challenges or simply leading a more successful and conscious life. Anyone interested in self-help and personal growth will find it to be an enjoyable and instructive read thanks to the author's simple writing style and relatable examples. You will love reading it as much as I did, so get your copy now, everyone.

[Dhivya Bavananthi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was just amazed with the preface itself in this book. Mostly I won't read the preface wholly, will look into it and if it is not that much interesting, I will simply get inside the chapters of the book. But I was smiling, laughing and connecting every line of the preface that the author has given the facts and the reality that most of us or almost every common man is facing in day-to -day life in this modern world. It created more curiosity to read the book.

As the author Santhosh Sivaraj mentioned, this book is not leaving you to do what you wish but it makes you aware of what not to do. As the index shows, it's all about stopping ourselves from doing things unnecessarily or in a wrong way. If we stop doing the unwanted things, then automatically the time and the space for our most valuable things will be available and finished.

With the fantastic nature of the storytelling art, the author ensures all the readers to be entertained, interested, joyful and also intend to grasp the notion. We all will laugh, think, enjoy, connect, realize and take many points from every chapter of this book. I just loved the connection of the first chapter till the end in between the small stories in every other chapter.

"Stop Digging Your Own Grave" is an insightful book that encourages us to reflect on our self-sabotaging tendencies and also to cultivate positivity in our life. The real-life examples are more relatable and also the way the author throws light on the truths prevailing in our present time provides strategies to overcome our counterproductive habits.

It's unique from other common self-help books because of the simple and humorous writing style which includes stories too. The key takeaways in the end of the chapters are easy to remember and to reflect by the readers. The book cover could have been better to reach most of the people since the content is excellent. It is an entertaining and thought-provoking self-help book.

[thesnuggledbookworm · Rating 5 out of 5]

Where every self-help book nowadays comes with the same agenda of telling us what is the correct way of living or doing things, this book felt like a breathe of fresh air. This book, not for once, tells you what to do but instead helps you understand what you need to stop doing so that you can quite literally stop digging your own grave. The author quite simply but effectively points out how we simply do damage to our own success path whether it's  by being of afraid new opportunities, or procrastinating because we don't want to leave the cocoon of comfort, after all our mind will repeatedly choose a comfortable hell over uncomfortable hell. And at the end of the day, all these things are what leads us to face anxiety, frustration and all sorts of negative feelings we can name. This book helps us to discover the toxic patterns in our lives and confront them head on. He, the author, pens the most complex things with a very simple approach which helps us readers to grasp those topics with a strong understanding and even helps us to lay a strong foundation for our personal growth. In today's day where most of us have lost ourselves in some way or the other, the author reminds us it's our own voice, our own needs, our boundaries, and us is what matters at the end of the day. Prioritising ourselves isn't a selfish thing but a necessity today's world. The author specifically wrote some to-be-remembered points in short, crisp, direct manner which I felt is helpful since all of ours attention span is reducing night & day.
As someone who isn't too inclined towards reading any sort of self-help books, this book really didn't felt like one, it felt like reading a story that is reflecting my own life and journey. I would highly suggest this book to you all, even if you are not specifically looking for a self-help book, it will still going to be great read.

[Prerna Shambhavee · Rating 4 out of 5]

I just wrapped up reading “Stop Digging Your Own Grave” and I can’t stop smiling. Santhosh Sivaraj's writing reminds me of that one friend who never hesitates to tell me the truth. The book was genuinely funny and at the same time brutally honest.

I am sure most of us at one time or the other have attempted to attain our dreams while pretending to be responsible adults. In reality, most of us are just hoping for the best. This book has been incredibly refreshing as its pointed out the fact that making mistakes is completely fine and we are not alone in this capricious world.

This book’s most redeeming feature, in my opinion, is its genuineness. The author doesn’t make the mistake of attempting to portray himself as some kind of guru who possesses all the answers. Rather, he simply details his struggles and lessons, and as a result, the book reads more like an informal discussion rather than a strict lecture.

The author manages to address procrastination, self-doubt, and the self-care movement with humor and humility. From his writing style, we can easily observe that he isn’t trying too hard. He provides us with readily usable tips that are useful in day-to-day life.

Being gentle with ourselves is one of the most notable takeaways from this book. More often than not, we are our own worst enemies, scolding ourselves for shortcomings and failures that exist only in our minds. This means the author’s message is that falling is a part of life and it is okay to take a tumble now and then because at the end of it, we are all in this together and laughing is the best medicine.

'Stop Digging Your Own Grave' is a hilarious book that will definitely put a smile on your face and give you a reason to change some aspects of your life. You should definitely buy a copy because we can all accomplish our goals together, one tumble at a time!

[Amreen Shaikh · Rating 4 out of 5]

We all lead lives that often feel rigidly structured, where every detail is predetermined—when we wake up, what we eat, and even when we embark on adventures like trekking. Yet, deep down, many of us understand that this isn't the full picture. Eating healthy goes beyond just stocking vegetables in the fridge; it’s about nourishing ourselves in a way that truly supports our well-being. Likewise, when we make plans for our lives, we need thoughtful guidance and the right resources to shape them into something meaningful.

This book isn't merely a collection of words; it's a profound reflection of our shared experiences, a time machine that encourages us to look back and learn. It invites us to take a reality check that many of us may have been putting off, much like that overdue library book. Together, we'll find humor in the absurdities of life, transforming moments of embarrassment into moments of clarity, while also navigating the tricky path of self-doubt that we all face at times. It’s a light-hearted guide through the ups and downs that we all encounter.

The story of Chintamani resonates with many of us, reflecting the struggles we’ve all experienced at various points in our lives. As we read his journey, we uncover valuable lessons about what might be going wrong and how we can grow from it. Collaborating with Kalpa Tree, Chintamani offers insights that challenge us to question whether the paths we’re on are truly right for us.

Santhosh Sivaraj has approached this topic with creativity and compassion, helping us to gain clarity on what we truly need in our lives. Each chapter serves as a stepping stone toward understanding success on a personal level. For me, this book was not just a read, but a heartfelt experience, and I came away with a wealth of knowledge and inspiration.

[Shardha · Rating 5 out of 5]

⚡This book offers readers a refreshing take on the inevitable blunders we all encounter in our daily lives. This engaging non-fiction book serves as both a guide and a source of humor, reminding us that mistakes are not just common but often essential to personal growth and resilience.

⚡This book is a reminder in every chapter to pause and assess. Smile at the thought that every step forward, no matter how small, is a step towards stability and success. Remember, the most captivating stories aren't about instant wins. They're about continued resilience, smart choices and the beauty of building something lasting.

⚡The author has added quotes at the beginning of every chapter and takeaways at the end of chapter. The stories added are absolutely relatable to the message that the author is trying to convey to the readers. Each chapter is filled with actionable advice and strategies for turning slip-ups into learning experiences. The author emphasizes the importance of self-compassion, urging readers to view mistakes as opportunities for growth rather than sources of shame.

⚡The author's writing style is conversational and approachable, inviting readers to reflect on their own experiences while also providing insight into the universal nature of human error. The title of the book is exactly what author want to advice all the readers and people who are in need to know all about.

⚡It is a delightful and insightful read that offers valuable lessons. The author has created a guide that not only helps us navigate our own mistakes but also inspires us to approach life with a sense of levity and grace. If you are looking for practical advice, this book is sure to resonate with anyone who has ever stumbled along the way. Highly recommended for those seeking a lighter perspective on life's inevitable misadventures!

[Soochi Sandhiya · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stop Digging Your Own Grave offers a refreshing take on self-improvement by focusing on what not to do rather than giving the usual advice on what to do. Instead of adding more tasks to our already overwhelming lives, the book helps readers identify and unlearn the habits that lead to stress, failure, and unhappiness. Through relatable storytelling and humour, Santosh Sivaraj highlights the ways we unknowingly sabotage our success, relationships, mental peace, and overall well-being, making this a thought-provoking and engaging read.Unlike traditional self-help books that tell us what to do, this book takes a different approach by highlighting what we should avoid doing. It aims to help readers unlearn habits that lead to financial struggles, career setbacks, relationship issues, poor health, and mental distress.

Through the story of Chintamani, the book sheds light on common mistakes that negatively impact our lives. It provides practical solutions to break these self-destructive patterns—for instance, avoiding spending before earning to ensure financial stability, letting go of the need to be extraordinary for greater success, reducing overthinking for mental peace, and paying attention to the body's signals for better health.

The book explores in depth how self-sabotaging behaviours, such as overthinking and fear of failure, often lead to anxiety and setbacks which have a prolonged effect on our productivity. The book follows a light and humorous tone to comprehend, making it both engaging and insightful. The book encourages to overcome societal pressures and pay attention on building a fulfilling and balanced life which is more content and satisfying. The book contains a deeper and significant message and serves in a category of "Must Read"

[Ishan Agrawal · Rating 4 out of 5]

No one is perfect in this world but the problem arises when we try to undo the wrongs by expecting monumental changes in our lifestyle. As they say , Rome wasn't built in a single day, recurrent habits take time to change and one should always start gradually with small steps one at a time . We must have observed that on days we feel low or depressed it kind of shows in every aspect like our reflexes become slow while returning a rocket serve in Table Tennis or our bed remains dishavelled. We directly try to see the bigger picture without realising that if we start making little alterations, the bigger things will take care of itself which is the underlying message of this book as well.

The title might seem daunting to you and can make you feel that author is coming up with reality checks and he actually does so but in a manner you wouldn't have anticipated. With his tongue in cheek humour and relatable anecdotes you would feel guilty of being trapped in reality but at the same time can't stop yourself from laughing at your own peril. The book is divided into chapters each focusing on a particular life lesson.

The crux of the work is the fact that there is a thin line between success and failure. If you keep practicing small disciplines over a period of time you will achieve whatever you strive for . On the contrary, the tiny mistakes everyday will make you fall in pit in no time. Though one thing that could have been better is if the author has suggested some practical solutions to the everyday hiccups we face . A solution oriented approach is missing which would have garnered more appreciation.

Overall a work that reminded me so many things about my own self.

[Pooja Farwaha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Over-committing to unrealistic goals, self-sabotaging behavior, making impulsive life choices, falling into toxic productivity traps - all of it makes us unknowingly dig our own grave. The title 'Stop Digging Your Own Grave' is a smart and well-justified choice for this book. It's very catchy and perfectly aligns with the book's core message. For me, the title immediately set the tone and the moment I read the title, I was all prepared to read the author's perspective on the unnecessary struggles we create for ourselves in everyday life.
Throughout the book, the author humorously reveals the ways we make our lives harder. These instances may include buying a life planner at 3 AM thinking you've finally figured it out and being in the never-ending loop of dieting. Through such witty and relatable everyday scenarios, Santhosh Sivaraj highlights the silly nature of modern life which often results in failed attempts at self-improvement. His writing style is conversational, as if we're chatting with a friend who keeps scolding us for repeatedly falling into the same traps.
The author suggests to self-reflect by taking a step back, even laughing at our own mistakes, and adopting a more balanced approach to life. This perfect balance of humor and reflection makes this book different from the conventional self-help books. And it's also well-structured with each chapter focusing on a specific life struggle and its corresponding life lesson. This makes it super easy to read the complete book in fragments.
Anyone looking for a meaningful perspective on life's everyday challenges, this book is definitely for you. It's a very entertaining, meaningful and humorously interesting book. Totally recommended from my side.

[Kriti Dalmia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Book Review: Stop Digging Your Own Grave by Santosh Sivaraj

Stop Digging Your Own Grave by Santosh Sivaraj is an insightful and thought-provoking self-help book that offers readers a guide to breaking free from self-destructive patterns and taking control of their lives. Through his book, Sivaraj explores the psychological and emotional underpinnings of the habits and choices that limit us, challenging readers to step back and reassess their behavior.

The book’s premise centers on the metaphor of “digging your own grave,” which Sivaraj uses to describe the unconscious choices people make that lead them to harm themselves, whether through toxic relationships, unhealthy behaviors, or limiting mindsets. The main message is that most people are inadvertently causing their own misery and difficulties, sometimes out of fear, self-doubt, or plain ignorance.

Sivaraj's writing is clear, approachable, and grounded in practical advice, making the concepts accessible to a wide audience. Through a combination of introspective exercises and real-world examples, Sivaraj helps guide the reader toward greater self-awareness and positive change.

Another highlight is the book’s exploration of mindset. Sivaraj takes the time to explain how our thought patterns shape our actions and, ultimately, our lives. He provides easy-to-use tools to assist people in creating a healthier, constructive mindset that frees them from poor patterns. I appreciated how there were takeaways at the end of each chapter so that you can have a summary and also it assists you in future reading.

Stop Digging Your Own Grave is an inspiring and moving read for anyone who wants to move on from counterproductive patterns and lead a more satisfying existence.

[Deamer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cue this, you have been fighting across challenges whatever life has thrown across with no end, just pushing through based on what life has set its expectations on you, probably more of striving towards things like money, success etc. But despite that, some challenges still are coming across your way, which are cutting you even harder as you go. Well then maybe you might need to look at another way out of this, maybe not focus on the symptoms, peel back the layers to find out the root cause. This book might come in handy for you then.

For context, have you always wondered why you seem to rush through for the next big moment rather than actually focusing on the present moment, and well why are you even rushing to the next thing? Is it because someone said doing this might give you the gratification you need, or maybe you have gotten used to this. I am going too deep right, well I slipped away right into introspection mode as soon as I started reading this.

Kudos to the author for building up the book in such a witty refreshing way that you can't help get hooked on it. The book starts with a character Chinta suffering from the same malady as you probably are, desperately trying to find a way out. He goes to a magical Kalpa tree to wish his problems away but at a cost of time. What follows is peeling back challenges bit by bit to get down to the grassroot level, and it is written in such a crisp way that you cant help but wonder, should I change something too, rather than trying to shoo the problem away.

Personally, I have been on the same journey for a while, so I can completely relate to what the author is motivating us to do, and so reading this felt like home in a way, so yeah I enjoyed reading this one.

Book Recommendation - Hell Yeah.

[SID VERMA · Rating 4 out of 5]

Book Review: Stop Digging Your Own Grave by Santhosh Sivaraj

Some books entertain you. Some books teach you. And then there are books like this—ones that do both while making you laugh at your own life choices.

I picked up this book at a time when I was feeling drained and unmotivated, stuck in the cycle of stress and overthinking. I wasn’t expecting much, but what I found was a refreshingly honest take on life’s everyday struggles. Santhosh Sivaraj doesn’t just dish out advice—he makes you reflect, laugh, and rethink your approach to life, all while keeping things light and engaging.

The best part? It never feels like a typical self-help book. His conversational tone makes it feel like you’re chatting with a brutally honest but well-meaning friend. Someone who has been through the same struggles—overthinking, anxiety, self-doubt, relationship hiccups—and is now telling you, "Relax, you’re not alone in this mess." He shares stories that are painfully relatable, and at times, hilariously eye-opening. Some even made me pause and think, Wow, I do that too.

What sets this book apart is how effortlessly it balances humor with wisdom. Unlike other self-help books that can feel repetitive or preachy, this one keeps you hooked with witty storytelling and real-life examples. It doesn’t just tell you to "stop stressing" or "be positive"—it gives you practical ways to shift your mindset and deal with life’s chaos.

I finished this book in just five days, which is rare for me when it comes to motivational reads. And if you’re someone who usually finds self-help books boring or overwhelming, trust me—this one is different. It’s light, fun, and full of lessons that actually stick with you.