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Old: What Happens As We Age?
According to the National Council on Aging, in 2020 there were about 58 million people over the age of 65, 38% higher than in 2010. The number of people over 100 tripled in 2020 over the number in 1980. The U.S. Census report commissioned by the National Institute on Aging predicted that the number of Americans over 65 will double by 2030, reaching 72 million. The age group of 85 and older is the fastest growing in American society.
Dr. Parkhurst is passionate about wanting to help patients and their families arrive at the right decision when faced with a medical dilemma. It is her hope that this book will prompt family discussions and ultimate valid choices.
She believes that by educating people concerning the changes in aging, they will be able to make informed decisions about how they wish to live out the balance of their lives and how they will be able to make decisions concerning their ultimate death.
This book is written for the following
• Everyone who is old and all of those who hope to be.
• Everyone who has ageing parents, partners or other loved ones.
Everyone who may be called upon to make complex medical choices for themselves or others.
This includes the so-called Sandwich people who are still raising their children but are now called upon to help their aging parents. Another part of this broad readership will be those who are aging with partners they are worried about. For these readers, the daily challenges are relentless. As they live through the declines in their loved ones, they inevitably must negotiate choices that need to be made, and they are looking for help.
Dr. Parkhurst is passionate about wanting to help patients and their families arrive at the right decision when faced with a medical dilemma. It is her hope that this book will prompt family discussions and ultimate valid choices.
She believes that by educating people concerning the changes in aging, they will be able to make informed decisions about how they wish to live out the balance of their lives and how they will be able to make decisions concerning their ultimate death.
This book is written for the following
• Everyone who is old and all of those who hope to be.
• Everyone who has ageing parents, partners or other loved ones.
Everyone who may be called upon to make complex medical choices for themselves or others.
This includes the so-called Sandwich people who are still raising their children but are now called upon to help their aging parents. Another part of this broad readership will be those who are aging with partners they are worried about. For these readers, the daily challenges are relentless. As they live through the declines in their loved ones, they inevitably must negotiate choices that need to be made, and they are looking for help.
110 pages, Kindle Edition
Published September 25, 2024
2 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
October 3, 2024
Aging and death are inevitable. If you’re young today, they’re lurking somewhere in the years ahead. Your loved ones, older than you are possibly in the throes of aging and death now. You see their pain and horrible suffering, but you’re helpless to intervene and do something to help them...
Now, suppose someone authoritative on this final stage of life could share their immense knowledge gleaned from real-life experiences with you. Won’t you be delighted to learn all that’s needed? Then, dive in and craft a plan that affords the least pain and suffering to your loved one so they live the rest of their lives happily, and die gracefully, peacefully, with dignity, denied no right or wish, satisfied that no arbitrary choice of medicines or medical treatment (that they dread) will be administered in their final moments etc.? I’m sure you will.
Enter Dr. Doreen C Parkhurst, MD, FACEP (this book's author), a senior ER physician with over 30 years of experience, which naturally includes seniors and those who are terminally ill. In addition, she has studied Thanatology and provided complete (including medical) care for her mother who lived till 102. After reading her book, you’ll be aware of issues relevant to this life stage in detail, both short and long-term. You’ll be able to make an informed plan after discussing questions like how and where your loved one would like to die, whether they’ve written a living will, appointed a surrogate or proxy to act in their place when the times come, whether they’ve specified which treatments or medications they would refuse if they became terminally ill and unable to communicate, their choices in medical assistance in dying (MAID) (if necessary), and a whole lot more.
Your informed, thoughtfully written plan will surely ease everything for your loved one and give them peace knowing they're going away the very best possible way so that a rewarding smile of satisfaction lights up both their and your faces!
Now, suppose someone authoritative on this final stage of life could share their immense knowledge gleaned from real-life experiences with you. Won’t you be delighted to learn all that’s needed? Then, dive in and craft a plan that affords the least pain and suffering to your loved one so they live the rest of their lives happily, and die gracefully, peacefully, with dignity, denied no right or wish, satisfied that no arbitrary choice of medicines or medical treatment (that they dread) will be administered in their final moments etc.? I’m sure you will.
Enter Dr. Doreen C Parkhurst, MD, FACEP (this book's author), a senior ER physician with over 30 years of experience, which naturally includes seniors and those who are terminally ill. In addition, she has studied Thanatology and provided complete (including medical) care for her mother who lived till 102. After reading her book, you’ll be aware of issues relevant to this life stage in detail, both short and long-term. You’ll be able to make an informed plan after discussing questions like how and where your loved one would like to die, whether they’ve written a living will, appointed a surrogate or proxy to act in their place when the times come, whether they’ve specified which treatments or medications they would refuse if they became terminally ill and unable to communicate, their choices in medical assistance in dying (MAID) (if necessary), and a whole lot more.
Your informed, thoughtfully written plan will surely ease everything for your loved one and give them peace knowing they're going away the very best possible way so that a rewarding smile of satisfaction lights up both their and your faces!
July 25, 2025
A Powerful, Timely Wake-Up Call
As someone in my early 50s, Old struck a nerve I didn’t know was exposed. We spend so much time preparing for marriage, parenthood, and careers, yet we rarely talk about preparing for the final chapter of life, our own or our parents’. Doreen Parkhurst gives us the roadmap we need.
She opens the book with a poignant example: the Biden-Trump presidential debate, and the media firestorm that followed. It was a moment when age was suddenly front-page news, not in terms of policy or performance, but appearance and mental sharpness. Parkhurst uses that event to ask a much deeper question: Why are we so uncomfortable with aging?
From there, she unpacks the very real, very visible signs of growing older, slower speech, forgetfulness, physical frailty, but she does so with deep compassion. She shows that these changes are not failings; they’re part of being human. She challenges the reader not to pity the elderly, but to understand them. And to see our future in them.
Her writing is as practical as it is moving. She talks about the importance of advance directives, the need for family discussions about life support and terminal illness, and how to make critical decisions that align with a loved one’s values. She even addresses the societal gap in understanding aging, especially in American culture, where old age is often hidden, feared, or dismissed.
What sets this book apart is its courage. Parkhurst dares to talk about death, not as a failure, but as a phase to approach with forethought and grace. I came away from this book more informed, less afraid, and incredibly grateful.
As someone in my early 50s, Old struck a nerve I didn’t know was exposed. We spend so much time preparing for marriage, parenthood, and careers, yet we rarely talk about preparing for the final chapter of life, our own or our parents’. Doreen Parkhurst gives us the roadmap we need.
She opens the book with a poignant example: the Biden-Trump presidential debate, and the media firestorm that followed. It was a moment when age was suddenly front-page news, not in terms of policy or performance, but appearance and mental sharpness. Parkhurst uses that event to ask a much deeper question: Why are we so uncomfortable with aging?
From there, she unpacks the very real, very visible signs of growing older, slower speech, forgetfulness, physical frailty, but she does so with deep compassion. She shows that these changes are not failings; they’re part of being human. She challenges the reader not to pity the elderly, but to understand them. And to see our future in them.
Her writing is as practical as it is moving. She talks about the importance of advance directives, the need for family discussions about life support and terminal illness, and how to make critical decisions that align with a loved one’s values. She even addresses the societal gap in understanding aging, especially in American culture, where old age is often hidden, feared, or dismissed.
What sets this book apart is its courage. Parkhurst dares to talk about death, not as a failure, but as a phase to approach with forethought and grace. I came away from this book more informed, less afraid, and incredibly grateful.
July 25, 2025
The Book That Opened My Eyes
There are books you read, and then there are books that change the way you see life. Old by Doreen Parkhurst belongs in the latter category. With unflinching honesty and surprising warmth, Parkhurst confronts one of life’s most universal and least discussed realities: aging. She uses the cultural lens of the 2024 Biden-Trump debate to show just how deeply uncomfortable our society is with old age, even as the population over 85 is skyrocketing.
But this book is not about politics. It’s about people, about the ways our loved ones change as they grow old. About the subtle signs: forgetting names, repeating stories, shuffling when they walk, struggling to follow a conversation. Parkhurst doesn’t present these changes as tragedies, but as truths. She writes with deep respect and understanding.
She also challenges us to do something rare: plan ahead. For death. For decline. For dignity. Her chapter on end-of-life care is one of the most powerful I’ve read, clear-eyed, practical, and deeply humane. She encourages us to have hard conversations before a crisis strikes, and she provides the tools to begin.
I saw my father on every page of this book. And I saw myself, too, scared, uncertain, avoiding the inevitable. But after reading Old, I felt empowered. I knew what to ask, how to talk, and most importantly, how to listen. This is not a depressing book. It’s a compassionate, necessary one. I’ll be recommending it to everyone I know who has aging parents, or who hopes to grow old themselves.
There are books you read, and then there are books that change the way you see life. Old by Doreen Parkhurst belongs in the latter category. With unflinching honesty and surprising warmth, Parkhurst confronts one of life’s most universal and least discussed realities: aging. She uses the cultural lens of the 2024 Biden-Trump debate to show just how deeply uncomfortable our society is with old age, even as the population over 85 is skyrocketing.
But this book is not about politics. It’s about people, about the ways our loved ones change as they grow old. About the subtle signs: forgetting names, repeating stories, shuffling when they walk, struggling to follow a conversation. Parkhurst doesn’t present these changes as tragedies, but as truths. She writes with deep respect and understanding.
She also challenges us to do something rare: plan ahead. For death. For decline. For dignity. Her chapter on end-of-life care is one of the most powerful I’ve read, clear-eyed, practical, and deeply humane. She encourages us to have hard conversations before a crisis strikes, and she provides the tools to begin.
I saw my father on every page of this book. And I saw myself, too, scared, uncertain, avoiding the inevitable. But after reading Old, I felt empowered. I knew what to ask, how to talk, and most importantly, how to listen. This is not a depressing book. It’s a compassionate, necessary one. I’ll be recommending it to everyone I know who has aging parents, or who hopes to grow old themselves.
July 25, 2025
Every Family Needs This Book
There are so many books on how to raise children, but almost none on how to care for aging parents. That’s what makes Old such a treasure. Doreen Parkhurst has written the guidebook I didn’t know I desperately needed. With empathy and clarity, she walks readers through the many changes that happen as we age, not just physically, but cognitively, emotionally, and socially.
What I appreciated most was how she gave language to things I’d noticed but couldn’t articulate. My mom forgets names mid-sentence. My dad repeats stories, often not realizing it. I thought they were signs of decline, and in some ways, they are, but they’re also part of a predictable, natural process. Parkhurst explains that aging doesn’t look the same for everyone, but it always carries common threads.
She also pushes readers to prepare, not react. She talks about the importance of discussing medical wishes before illness strikes. Do you want CPR? A ventilator? Feeding tubes? These are difficult questions, but Parkhurst shows how answering them in advance can preserve dignity and prevent unnecessary suffering.
What touched me most was her tone. She doesn’t speak down to the reader. She writes as someone who has been there, who has watched someone she loves age and die, and who wants to help others face that with strength and grace.
Old isn’t just for people over 60. It’s for all of us who love someone who is aging. It’s for adult children, caregivers, spouses, even healthcare workers. It belongs on every family’s bookshelf.
There are so many books on how to raise children, but almost none on how to care for aging parents. That’s what makes Old such a treasure. Doreen Parkhurst has written the guidebook I didn’t know I desperately needed. With empathy and clarity, she walks readers through the many changes that happen as we age, not just physically, but cognitively, emotionally, and socially.
What I appreciated most was how she gave language to things I’d noticed but couldn’t articulate. My mom forgets names mid-sentence. My dad repeats stories, often not realizing it. I thought they were signs of decline, and in some ways, they are, but they’re also part of a predictable, natural process. Parkhurst explains that aging doesn’t look the same for everyone, but it always carries common threads.
She also pushes readers to prepare, not react. She talks about the importance of discussing medical wishes before illness strikes. Do you want CPR? A ventilator? Feeding tubes? These are difficult questions, but Parkhurst shows how answering them in advance can preserve dignity and prevent unnecessary suffering.
What touched me most was her tone. She doesn’t speak down to the reader. She writes as someone who has been there, who has watched someone she loves age and die, and who wants to help others face that with strength and grace.
Old isn’t just for people over 60. It’s for all of us who love someone who is aging. It’s for adult children, caregivers, spouses, even healthcare workers. It belongs on every family’s bookshelf.
July 25, 2025
More Than a Book, It’s a Wake-Up Call
Doreen Parkhurst has written a remarkable book that does what few others dare: she forces us to look at the end of life without flinching. Old is not morbid or pessimistic. It’s honest, brave, and quietly urgent.
The brilliance of this book lies in its clarity. Parkhurst doesn’t hide behind medical jargon or euphemisms. She tells you the truth: most of us are not prepared for the aging of our loved ones, or ourselves. We don’t talk about it. We don’t plan. And then we’re shocked and devastated when decline comes.
Through real-world examples and gentle but firm guidance, she shows what aging actually looks like: the forgetfulness, the slow gait, the loss of focus, the emotional shifts. I found myself thinking of my grandmother on nearly every page. Her slow transformation now feels less mysterious, less frightening.
Parkhurst also offers a wealth of practical advice, how to start difficult conversations, what decisions need to be made in advance, how to advocate for a loved one in medical settings. But what makes this book unforgettable is its heart. She never lets us forget that behind every diagnosis is a person who wants to be seen, heard, and respected.
I finished Old feeling more empowered than I ever expected. This book should be required reading for every adult child, caregiver, or spouse navigating the complexities of elder care. It’s a gift of wisdom, and a call to action.
Doreen Parkhurst has written a remarkable book that does what few others dare: she forces us to look at the end of life without flinching. Old is not morbid or pessimistic. It’s honest, brave, and quietly urgent.
The brilliance of this book lies in its clarity. Parkhurst doesn’t hide behind medical jargon or euphemisms. She tells you the truth: most of us are not prepared for the aging of our loved ones, or ourselves. We don’t talk about it. We don’t plan. And then we’re shocked and devastated when decline comes.
Through real-world examples and gentle but firm guidance, she shows what aging actually looks like: the forgetfulness, the slow gait, the loss of focus, the emotional shifts. I found myself thinking of my grandmother on nearly every page. Her slow transformation now feels less mysterious, less frightening.
Parkhurst also offers a wealth of practical advice, how to start difficult conversations, what decisions need to be made in advance, how to advocate for a loved one in medical settings. But what makes this book unforgettable is its heart. She never lets us forget that behind every diagnosis is a person who wants to be seen, heard, and respected.
I finished Old feeling more empowered than I ever expected. This book should be required reading for every adult child, caregiver, or spouse navigating the complexities of elder care. It’s a gift of wisdom, and a call to action.
July 25, 2025
A Manual for the Heart
There’s a quiet power in this book that caught me off guard. I picked it up expecting something clinical or morbid. What I found was something entirely different: a guide to love better, live wiser, and face death with dignity.
Doreen Parkhurst writes about aging not as a medical problem, but as a human journey. She explains the subtle ways people change, the way their gait shifts, their ability to focus drifts, their memory frays, and she invites us to meet those changes with understanding, not frustration. As someone caring for my 84-year-old father, I found myself nodding through every page.
She also pulls no punches when it comes to end-of-life planning. Too often, families wait until there’s a crisis, an accident, a stroke, a terminal diagnosis, before asking, “What would Mom want?” Parkhurst urges us not to wait. She offers a framework for making these decisions ahead of time, with clarity and love.
One of the most moving parts of the book is how she reframes death. Not as failure, but as a chapter we all reach. She shows how a well-planned death, where wishes are honored and suffering is minimized, is not just possible but deeply meaningful.
I cried reading some passages. Not because they were sad, but because they were true. Old reminded me that we can’t avoid this part of life. But we can face it together, with grace.
There’s a quiet power in this book that caught me off guard. I picked it up expecting something clinical or morbid. What I found was something entirely different: a guide to love better, live wiser, and face death with dignity.
Doreen Parkhurst writes about aging not as a medical problem, but as a human journey. She explains the subtle ways people change, the way their gait shifts, their ability to focus drifts, their memory frays, and she invites us to meet those changes with understanding, not frustration. As someone caring for my 84-year-old father, I found myself nodding through every page.
She also pulls no punches when it comes to end-of-life planning. Too often, families wait until there’s a crisis, an accident, a stroke, a terminal diagnosis, before asking, “What would Mom want?” Parkhurst urges us not to wait. She offers a framework for making these decisions ahead of time, with clarity and love.
One of the most moving parts of the book is how she reframes death. Not as failure, but as a chapter we all reach. She shows how a well-planned death, where wishes are honored and suffering is minimized, is not just possible but deeply meaningful.
I cried reading some passages. Not because they were sad, but because they were true. Old reminded me that we can’t avoid this part of life. But we can face it together, with grace.
July 28, 2025
I Wish I’d Read This Before Dad Got Sick
Parkhurst’s Old hit me hard, in the best way. I read it just weeks after losing my father, and I couldn’t stop thinking, “Where was this book last year?” It’s everything I needed: honest, practical, and tender.
The way she opens with the 2024 debate is genius. It instantly grounds the subject in something familiar and political, but quickly shifts to the personal. She gets to the root of our cultural discomfort with aging, why we whisper about it, hide it, fear it. Then she tears those walls down, brick by brick.
Her explanation of medical decline was eerily accurate. Everything she described, word loss, short attention, disorientation, I saw in my dad. But what she gave me was something more precious than understanding. She gave me forgiveness. For not knowing what to say. For the mistakes I made. For the unspoken grief.
This book is a gift to every adult child. Read it before your loved one needs help. Read it again during the journey. I’ll keep a copy on my shelf forever.
Parkhurst’s Old hit me hard, in the best way. I read it just weeks after losing my father, and I couldn’t stop thinking, “Where was this book last year?” It’s everything I needed: honest, practical, and tender.
The way she opens with the 2024 debate is genius. It instantly grounds the subject in something familiar and political, but quickly shifts to the personal. She gets to the root of our cultural discomfort with aging, why we whisper about it, hide it, fear it. Then she tears those walls down, brick by brick.
Her explanation of medical decline was eerily accurate. Everything she described, word loss, short attention, disorientation, I saw in my dad. But what she gave me was something more precious than understanding. She gave me forgiveness. For not knowing what to say. For the mistakes I made. For the unspoken grief.
This book is a gift to every adult child. Read it before your loved one needs help. Read it again during the journey. I’ll keep a copy on my shelf forever.
July 28, 2025
Finally, A Guide That Doesn’t Sugarcoat Aging
There’s no shortage of books on aging, but most offer platitudes or lean too heavily into scientific jargon. Doreen Parkhurst does something rare: she speaks plainly and powerfully, as someone who has seen the realities firsthand.
What stood out to me was her balance. She neither glorifies nor mourns aging, she respects it. Her prose is clean and direct, but with a warmth that reminds you this subject deserves both facts and feelings. I appreciated that she doesn’t flinch when discussing the hardest truths: losing mobility, mental sharpness, and, eventually, life.
The real power of Old lies in the stories, brief vignettes and examples that make every chapter feel grounded. I saw my aunt, my neighbor, my own future in her pages. It was sobering. And it was empowering.
If you’ve ever been afraid of aging or unsure how to support someone in decline, read this book. It won’t solve everything. But it will prepare you, and preparation is love in action.
There’s no shortage of books on aging, but most offer platitudes or lean too heavily into scientific jargon. Doreen Parkhurst does something rare: she speaks plainly and powerfully, as someone who has seen the realities firsthand.
What stood out to me was her balance. She neither glorifies nor mourns aging, she respects it. Her prose is clean and direct, but with a warmth that reminds you this subject deserves both facts and feelings. I appreciated that she doesn’t flinch when discussing the hardest truths: losing mobility, mental sharpness, and, eventually, life.
The real power of Old lies in the stories, brief vignettes and examples that make every chapter feel grounded. I saw my aunt, my neighbor, my own future in her pages. It was sobering. And it was empowering.
If you’ve ever been afraid of aging or unsure how to support someone in decline, read this book. It won’t solve everything. But it will prepare you, and preparation is love in action.
July 29, 2025
The Most Honest Book on Aging I've Ever Read
So many books about aging try to sugarcoat reality or use technical jargon that feels cold. Doreen Parkhurst does neither. Old is honest, clear-eyed, and most of all, humane. She explains aging not as a decline to fear, but a transition to understand.
The most impactful part for me was her breakdown of cognitive change. Her explanation of why older people repeat stories or struggle with word recall made me rethink the way I respond to my mother. I’ve been impatient with her. Now I’m just more present.
Parkhurst also addresses the emotional toll of aging, not just for the elderly, but for the people who love them. That dual focus makes this book unusually insightful. It’s not just a guide for seniors. It’s a manual for adult children, spouses, and friends.
I underlined entire sections. She doesn’t offer false hope, but she does offer comfort: comfort through knowledge, preparedness, and empathy. That’s powerful.
I want this book in every home. It will change how you relate to aging and how you love through it.
So many books about aging try to sugarcoat reality or use technical jargon that feels cold. Doreen Parkhurst does neither. Old is honest, clear-eyed, and most of all, humane. She explains aging not as a decline to fear, but a transition to understand.
The most impactful part for me was her breakdown of cognitive change. Her explanation of why older people repeat stories or struggle with word recall made me rethink the way I respond to my mother. I’ve been impatient with her. Now I’m just more present.
Parkhurst also addresses the emotional toll of aging, not just for the elderly, but for the people who love them. That dual focus makes this book unusually insightful. It’s not just a guide for seniors. It’s a manual for adult children, spouses, and friends.
I underlined entire sections. She doesn’t offer false hope, but she does offer comfort: comfort through knowledge, preparedness, and empathy. That’s powerful.
I want this book in every home. It will change how you relate to aging and how you love through it.
July 28, 2025
An Act of Love in Book Form
I didn’t expect to feel so moved by this book. But Doreen Parkhurst’s Old is not just a medical or societal look at aging, it’s an emotional journey. From the first page, I felt like I was in the hands of someone deeply empathetic and unafraid of life’s hardest conversations.
She uses the political moment of Biden and Trump’s 2024 debate as a cultural icebreaker, then shifts to far more intimate truths. What happens when your spouse begins to forget words? When your parent’s walk slows and their stories repeat? Parkhurst explains not just what these signs mean, but how to respond with grace.
This book helped me realize that aging doesn’t diminish a person’s essence. It just changes the way that essence is expressed. Her writing made me feel both grounded and uplifted.
By the end, I felt like I’d sat through a masterclass in both aging and humanity. Everyone over 40 should read this, and give a copy to their kids.
I didn’t expect to feel so moved by this book. But Doreen Parkhurst’s Old is not just a medical or societal look at aging, it’s an emotional journey. From the first page, I felt like I was in the hands of someone deeply empathetic and unafraid of life’s hardest conversations.
She uses the political moment of Biden and Trump’s 2024 debate as a cultural icebreaker, then shifts to far more intimate truths. What happens when your spouse begins to forget words? When your parent’s walk slows and their stories repeat? Parkhurst explains not just what these signs mean, but how to respond with grace.
This book helped me realize that aging doesn’t diminish a person’s essence. It just changes the way that essence is expressed. Her writing made me feel both grounded and uplifted.
By the end, I felt like I’d sat through a masterclass in both aging and humanity. Everyone over 40 should read this, and give a copy to their kids.
July 29, 2025
An Aging Parent’s Best Ally
I bought this book because I’m caring for my 83-year-old father. What I found inside was more than I expected, it was validation, education, and emotional support wrapped into one powerful resource.
Parkhurst writes in a tone that’s both authoritative and gentle. She walks readers through the physical, emotional, and cognitive changes of aging without ever sounding clinical or detached. She respects the reader and she respects the elderly.
Her section on how the body shuts down at the end of life was especially powerful. It helped me reframe what I used to see as “giving up” as a natural closing process. That alone gave me peace I didn’t know I needed.
But perhaps what I loved most is how this book invites us to stay close, to listen, to witness, to be present. Old isn’t about fixing aging. It’s about meeting it. And I feel more prepared now to meet it with love.
I bought this book because I’m caring for my 83-year-old father. What I found inside was more than I expected, it was validation, education, and emotional support wrapped into one powerful resource.
Parkhurst writes in a tone that’s both authoritative and gentle. She walks readers through the physical, emotional, and cognitive changes of aging without ever sounding clinical or detached. She respects the reader and she respects the elderly.
Her section on how the body shuts down at the end of life was especially powerful. It helped me reframe what I used to see as “giving up” as a natural closing process. That alone gave me peace I didn’t know I needed.
But perhaps what I loved most is how this book invites us to stay close, to listen, to witness, to be present. Old isn’t about fixing aging. It’s about meeting it. And I feel more prepared now to meet it with love.
July 29, 2025
Courageous, Clear, and Completely Necessary
Reading Old reminded me why I love good nonfiction, it expands your world, even when it narrows your focus. Doreen Parkhurst doesn’t just inform you about aging. She teaches you how to face it.
What I appreciated most was her refusal to pretend. She doesn’t promise that aging will be easy, or pretty, or fair. But she does promise that understanding it can lead to better choices, fewer regrets, and deeper love.
There’s something courageous about this book. It says out loud what most of us only whisper: that our parents will die. That we will decline. That preparing for that reality is not grim, it’s loving.
This isn’t a book you read and forget. It stays with you. It changes the way you talk to your elders. It changes how you think about yourself in 20 years.
If you want to show up for someone aging and for your future self, read this book. Then read it again.
Reading Old reminded me why I love good nonfiction, it expands your world, even when it narrows your focus. Doreen Parkhurst doesn’t just inform you about aging. She teaches you how to face it.
What I appreciated most was her refusal to pretend. She doesn’t promise that aging will be easy, or pretty, or fair. But she does promise that understanding it can lead to better choices, fewer regrets, and deeper love.
There’s something courageous about this book. It says out loud what most of us only whisper: that our parents will die. That we will decline. That preparing for that reality is not grim, it’s loving.
This isn’t a book you read and forget. It stays with you. It changes the way you talk to your elders. It changes how you think about yourself in 20 years.
If you want to show up for someone aging and for your future self, read this book. Then read it again.
July 28, 2025
I Didn’t Know What I Didn’t Know
Before reading Old, I thought I understood aging. I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it through grandparents and patients. But this book showed me how much I was missing. Doreen Parkhurst has condensed years of insight into one deeply impactful book.
Her tone is calm but firm. She doesn’t shy away from the truth: most of us are totally unprepared for the aging process. And even more so for death. But instead of scaring us, she arms us, with language, questions, and a call to compassion.
Her chapter on end-of-life decision-making should be required reading. It’s not just about paperwork, it’s about honoring the person, not just treating the body. That perspective changed everything for me.
Reading this book was humbling. It made me more patient, more thoughtful, and more ready to face the future with my eyes open.
Before reading Old, I thought I understood aging. I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it through grandparents and patients. But this book showed me how much I was missing. Doreen Parkhurst has condensed years of insight into one deeply impactful book.
Her tone is calm but firm. She doesn’t shy away from the truth: most of us are totally unprepared for the aging process. And even more so for death. But instead of scaring us, she arms us, with language, questions, and a call to compassion.
Her chapter on end-of-life decision-making should be required reading. It’s not just about paperwork, it’s about honoring the person, not just treating the body. That perspective changed everything for me.
Reading this book was humbling. It made me more patient, more thoughtful, and more ready to face the future with my eyes open.
July 28, 2025
Equal Parts Education and Compassion
This book is something rare: a factual guide that’s also deeply compassionate. Doreen Parkhurst knows her stuff, and she knows people. That combination makes Old a standout.
She writes with clarity about physical decline, cognitive change, and emotional loss. But she also writes about hope, the kind that comes from preparing, from understanding, from loving someone even as they change.
What I appreciated most was her focus on dignity. She reminds us that aging people are not burdens. They’re still full of stories, worth, and presence, even when they lose their sharpness.
I highlighted more in this book than almost anything I’ve read this year. Highly recommended for families, caregivers, and especially medical professionals.
This book is something rare: a factual guide that’s also deeply compassionate. Doreen Parkhurst knows her stuff, and she knows people. That combination makes Old a standout.
She writes with clarity about physical decline, cognitive change, and emotional loss. But she also writes about hope, the kind that comes from preparing, from understanding, from loving someone even as they change.
What I appreciated most was her focus on dignity. She reminds us that aging people are not burdens. They’re still full of stories, worth, and presence, even when they lose their sharpness.
I highlighted more in this book than almost anything I’ve read this year. Highly recommended for families, caregivers, and especially medical professionals.
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