Weird Business

by Joe R. Lansdale (Editor), Richard Klaw (Editor), Neal Barrett Jr.

If you're tired of the same ole business. If you want something unique. If you think comic book swimsuit issues are the dumbest thing since Jesse Helms, then here it is, a hot bundle of short stories, a la graphic novel style.

Not only does Weird Business contain tales by Edgar Allen Poe, Ambrose Bierce, and the late, great Robert Bloch, Jr, it contains mostly original material that will, to put it mildly, blow the doors off your Chevy. From pure fantasy to dark horror, to humorous whimsy, to noir, to action/adventure and science fiction, this baby is as hot as the devil's cigar.

Simply put, Weird Business is one of the most unusual and outstanding books ever done in the field of comics.

cover art provided by Dave Dorman

*Introduction by Joe R. Lansdale

*"Gorilla Gunslinger" by Norman Partridge
art by John Garcia
Letters by Doug Potter

*"Becoming the Monster" by Poppy Z. Brite
Art by Miran Kim

*"Till The Cows Come Home" by Mark Evans
Adapted, expanded and drawn by Ken Huey

*"Steel Valenine" by Joe R. Lansdale
Adaptation by Richard Klaw
Art by Marc Erickson
Letters by Brad Thomte

*"Stranger" by Brian Biggs

*"That Hellbound Train" by Robert Bloch
Adaptation by Neal Barrett, Jr.
Art by Phillip Hester, with Andre Walls & Ande Parks
Letters by Gary Peterson

*"Coccyx" by John Bergin

*"If I Close My Eyes Forever" by Charles de Lint
Pencils by Pia Guerra
Inks by William Traxtle
Letters by Doug Potter

*"Jesting With Chaos" by Michael Moorcock
Adaptation by Franz Henkel
Art by Shea Anton Pensa with Ted Naifeh
Letters by Brad Thomte

*"Dinosaur Love" by Richard Klaw
Pencils by Newt Manwich
Inks by Little Johnny Lovecloud with Michael Washburn

*"Masque of the Red Death" by Art by Morgan
Letters by Brad Thompte

*"Franklin & the Can of Whup-Ass" by Bill Crider
Art by Tom Foxmarnick
Letters by Carrie Spiegel

*"Chip of Fools" by Chet Williamson
Art by John Picacio

*"Man With Legs" by Al Sarrantonio
Art by Doug Potter

*"King of the Cows" by Scott Cupp
Art by Matthew Guest

*"In Repose" by Marc Paoletti
Art by Michael Lark

*"Trolling" by F. Paul Wilson
Art by Bill D. Fountain

*"Green Brother" by Howard Waldrop
Adaptation by Steve Utley
Art by John Lucas
Letters by Brad Thomte

*"And I Only Am Escaped to tell Thee" by Roger Zelazny
Adaptation by Paul Miles
Art by Barb & Theodore Spoon
Letters by Brad Thomte

*"Case of the Dancing Corpse" by Jerry Prosser
Art by Jason Morgan
Letters by Doug Potter

*"Heilage Nacht" by Neal Barrett, Jr.
Art by Omaha Perez
Letters by Carrie Spiegel

*"Oil of Dog" by [author:Ambrose Bierce.14403" title="14403">Edgar Allan Poe
Adaptation by Neal Barrett, Jr.
Art by Dean Rohrer

Genres: Horror, Comics, Graphic Novels, Graphic Novels Comics, Anthologies

420 pages, Hardcover

First published March 21, 1995

About the author

Champion Mojo Storyteller Joe R. Lansdale is the author of over forty novels and numerous short stories. His work has appeared in national anthologies, magazines, and collections, as well as numerous foreign publications. He has written for comics, television, film, newspapers, and Internet sites. His work has been collected in more than two dozen short-story collections, and he has edited or co-edited over a dozen anthologies. He has received the Edgar Award, eight Bram Stoker Awards, the Horror Writers Association Lifetime Achievement Award, the British Fantasy Award, the Grinzani Cavour Prize for Literature, the Herodotus Historical Fiction Award, the Inkpot Award for Contributions to Science Fiction and Fantasy, and many others. His novella Bubba Ho-Tep was adapted to film by Don Coscarelli, starring Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis. His story "Incident On and Off a Mountain Road" was adapted to film for Showtime's "Masters of Horror," and he adapted his short story "Christmas with the Dead" to film hisownself. The film adaptation of his novel Cold in July was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at the Sundance Film Festival, and the Sundance Channel has adapted his Hap & Leonard novels for television.

He is currently co-producing several films, among them The Bottoms, based on his Edgar Award-winning novel, with Bill Paxton and Brad Wyman, and The Drive-In, with Greg Nicotero. He is Writer In Residence at Stephen F. Austin State University, and is the founder of the martial arts system Shen Chuan: Martial Science and its affiliate, Shen Chuan Family System. He is a member of both the United States and International Martial Arts Halls of Fame. He lives in Nacogdoches, Texas with his wife, dog, and two cats.

Reviews

[Quentin Wallace · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a pretty thick volume and it had good, but also a lot of bad. Most of it was just too weird for me, but considering the title I went into it expecting that. It is a very original collection, the likes of which you rarely see outside of the old "underground" black and white comics. There are a few gems here, but really this wasn't for me.

If you enjoy really strange and eclectic comic collections, this is for you. If you are into more traditional comics rather than experimental fiction, then you probably won't like this one.

[Craig Childs · Rating 3 out of 5]

This 1995 graphic novel anthology collects 23 short stories in the genres of fantasy, crime noir, action-adventure, science fiction, and horror. One of the stories features full-color artwork, but most are black and white. Some are original stories; others are adaptations of prose stories.

The quality of this collection is quite uneven. My favorites are "Steel Valentine", "The Hellbound Train", "Masque of the Red Death" and "King of the Cows".

ORIGINAL STORIES

"Gorilla Gunslinger" by Norman Partridge; art by John Garcia -- In 1874 an intelligent talking gorilla, an apparent product of parallel evolution from an isolated African valley, is captured by procurers for P.T. Barnum. He escapes in Arizona but must blast his way to freedom against killer clowns and a band of anti-evolutionist reverend gunslingers.

"Becoming the Monster" by Poppy Z. Brite; art by Miran Kim -- Two psychotic male lovers form a twisted bond of love and loyalty. The older one teaches the other how to seduce and murder underage boys. The art is an interesting mixture of hand-drawn pencils overlaid with collages of actual photographs. This may have been edgy in the 1990's, especially the homoerotic aspects, but it has not aged well.

"Stranger" written and drawn by Brian Biggs -- A driver and a strange hitchhiker meet on a deserted road. A wry story told almost entirely in visuals.

"Cocyx" written and drawn by John Bergin -- A corpse relates the grim tale of a plague that strikes New York City. (Kind of weird to read this during the global coronavirus pandemic.) The artwork is striking, but the story is thin.

"If I Close My Eyes Forever" by Charles de Lint; art by Pia Guerra and William Traxtle -- An investigator tracks down a special pendant which the client believes allows her to see into the world of faerie. This story begins as a noir urban fantasy that delves into New York's underground lesbian S&M scene, but the plot fizzles at the end. There is scant payoff due to the fact our protagonist never sees into faerie herself, despite coming to believe in its existence.

"Dinosaur Love" by Richard Klaw; art by Newt Manwich and Michael Washburn -- Dr. Frankenstein is reimagined in this spoof story set in the 1950's. Dinosaurs once again roam the earth, thanks to radioactivity from nuclear weapons, and a mad scientist implants Marilyn Monroe's brain into the body of a triceratops. The story is whacky and might have been fun, but the artwork was confusing. It is difficult to distinguish the characters and follow the flow of action from panel to panel.

"Real Thing" by Nancy A. Collins; art by Morgan -- Series character Sonja Blue tracks down a wannabe vampire lord who is targeting goth teenagers. It turns out, Sonja is as passionate about killing fake vampires as she is real ones. The story is rather slight, but the main character is interesting, and the charcoal effect in the drawings is effective.

"Franklin & the Can of Whup-Ass" by Bill Crider; Art by Tom Foxmarnick -- Franklin is perpetually bullied at school, and so he cannot resist the sales pitch of the voodoo priest Mr. Tibbedeaux, who sells him a literal can of Whup Ass. It will release an evil spirit to torture the person Franklin hates most in all the world… but who, exactly, is that? This was an engaging, light-hearted story, even if the surprise ending was not much of a surprise.

"Chip of Fools" by Chet Williamson; art by John Picacio -- A lady on a message board calling herself "Charlotte" seduces lonely men and then kills them by sucking their souls into the computer. When three detectives examine her CPU, they find she is actually a blood-bloated spider sitting in a giant web. The noir artwork is impressive, but this is a particularly bad example of 1990's computer-themed horror stories, plus it revolves around a groan-inducing literary pun (i.e., Charlotte's Web).

"Man with Legs" by Al Sarrantonio ; art by Doug Potter -- A little girl on a school bus thinks she sees her dead father living in a different house in their neighborhood. When she returns later with her brother, she finds there is something not at all human about the man. Reminded me of Phillip K. Dick's short story "The Father-Thing".

"King of the Cows" by Scott Cupp ; art by Matthew Guest -- A butcher working on Good Friday receives a vision of himself in the role of Pontius Pilate, choosing to sacrifice the cow messiah over the others in the herd. Yes, it was sacrilegious, but I could not help laughing out loud -- it was also very funny.

"In Repose" by Marc Paoletti; art by Michael Lark -- Dr. Horace Dusk is a Tennyson-quoting mortician with a fetish for dead bodies. This story is an interesting take on an old theme, reminiscent of Edgar Allan Poe. The black and white images of 1880 London lend a lot of atmosphere to the tale.

"Trolling" by F. Paul Wilson ; art by Bill D. Fountain -- Carly and her blind grandmother go trolling in the park at night even though the mysterious and brutal Facelift Killer is on the loose. Another example of striking artwork unfortunately paired with a thin unimpressive narrative.

"Case of the Dancing Corpse" by Jerry Prosser ; art by Jason Morgan -- A beat cop and a sick old billionaire investigate a locked room mystery with occult overtones.

"Heilage Nacht" by Neal Barrett, Jr. ; art by Omaha perez -- Set in an alternate version of America under Nazi rule, it begins to snow in San Antonio on Christmas Eve, much to the delight of a top Nazi general. This bizarre comic features an orgy and a man in a Santa outfit having his prosthetic leg ripped off. It is written almost entirely in German.

ADAPTATIONS

"Till the Cows Come Home" based on a story by Mark Evans; adapted and drawn by Ken Huey - Sick of being slaughtered for meat and leather, sentient cows fight back against their human overlords. This satire falls as flat as a Chick Fil-A commercial.

"Steel Valentine" based on a story by Joe R. Lansdale; adapted by Richard Klaw; art by Marc Erickson -- After his affair with a married woman comes to light, one man must fight to save his life from her mad husband and a vicious dog. A fun adaptation of a taut, hard-boiled Lansdale story.

"The Hellbound Train" based on a story by Robert Bloch; adaptation by Neal Barrett, Jr.; art by Phillip Hester, Andre Walls, and Andre Parks -- This is an excellent adaptation of one of my favorite stories. Author Neal Barrett, Jr. hews closer to the source material than Joe and John Lansdale's 2011 adaptation, but Phillip Hester's black and white artwork cannot compete with Dave Wachter's full-color panels or the luscious covers by Menton3.

"Jesting With Chaos" based on a story by Michael Moorcock; adaptation by Franz Henkel; art by Shea Anton and Ted Naifeh -- Elric of Melnibone's only hope to escape eternal imprisonment is to entertain the Lords of Chaos by creating something new that it has never occurred to them to create. I have often heard how innovative Moorcock's Elric cycle is supposed to be, but based on this comic adaptation, I cannot see it as anything other than a pastiche of Conan the Barbarian. (The prose version of this story is sometimes titled "The Last Enchantment")

"Masque of the Red Death" based on a story by Edgar Allan Poe; adaptation by Eric Burnham; art by Ted Naifeh -- This is the highlight of the book. Naifeh's full color artwork is spot on in recreating the creepy sense of dread that permeates Poe's classic story.

"Green Brother" based on a story by Howard Waldrop; adaptation by Steve Utley; art by John Lucas -- A tribe of the Lakota people defeat a Union Army fort by raising the bones of a Tyrannosaurus "in those days [when] magic still worked for us."

"And I Only Am Escaped to Tell Thee" based on a story by Roger Zelzany ; adaptation by Paul Miles; art by Barb & Theodore Spoon -- A sailor on the cursed ship Flying Dutchman is swept overboard and survives to tell of its woeful fate, only to be rescued by the equally doomed Marie Celeste. I love the art, which reminds me of a kid's adventure book, but the story simply builds to the single reveal of the twist ending.

"Oil of Dog" based on a story by Ambrose Bierce ; adaptation by Neal Barrett, Jr.; Art by Dean Rohrer -- A boy helps his father steal dogs to boil into them into oil, and he helps his mother get rid of the village's unwanted infants. Then, one day he realizes how the family can combine these "honorable careers" to make more money. The full text of Bierce's classic dark satire is included along with the illustrations.

[Kent Clark · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some of the art was pretty good. Stories were m'eh.

[D.M. · Rating 3 out of 5]

Every time I read this book (and in the nearly 20 years since it came out, that's quite a few times), I want it to be better. It never is. It barely pays off the promise of its title, let alone the promise of the collection of creators between its covers. It's a fine gathering of writers and illustrators, with some able adaptations of old stories by a few classic masters, but the weirdness is in short supply. What it ends up as is another grouping of last-minute-stinger tales, with art of varying competence and beauty. Not quite 2-star 'ok', but far from 5-star 'amazing.' This is just a fun book for fans of Roald Dahl's short stories, Twilight Zone and others of that stripe.

[Clint · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was going to rate this lower as there's a fair amount of garbage in here. However, pressing on to was worth the time. I single out the following for those who feel compelled to put it down before finishing.

GOOD:
Gorilla Gunslinger
That Hellbound Train
Green Brother

NOT BAD:
The Masque of the Red Death
Man With Legs
In Repose
And I Only Am Escaped to Tell Thee
Case of the Dancing Corpse
Oil of Dog

[Tom Lucas · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a stacked TOC, but ultimately a mediocre collection -- which is baffling. I enjoyed the indie aspect of it as it reminded me of all the B/W comics I bought back in the 80s, but I struggle to point to any one story that is memorable. Honestly, I am surprised by how average this anthology really is

[Brian · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some good, some mediocre, some "what the hell".

[Cierra · Rating 2 out of 5]

I enjoyed a lot of the artwork but the writing fell short 90% of the time. This book is not BIPOC friendly and some women are portrayed as disposable objects.The saving grace of this entire collection is the adaptation of "The Hellbound Train" by Robert Bloch.

[David · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not everything in here is gold, but a couple of the stories (and artists!) are worth the book price alone. There are at least two amazing pen-and-ink artists featured here.