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Even Though I Knew the End
A magical detective dives into the affairs of Chicago's divine monsters to secure a future with the love of her life. This sapphic period piece will dazzle anyone looking for mystery, intrigue, romance, magic, or all of the above.
An exiled augur who sold her soul to save her brother's life is offered one last job before serving an eternity in hell. When she turns it down, her client sweetens the pot by offering up the one payment she can't resist—the chance to have a future where she grows old with the woman she loves.
To succeed, she is given three days to track down the White City Vampire, Chicago's most notorious serial killer. If she fails, only hell and heartbreak await.
An exiled augur who sold her soul to save her brother's life is offered one last job before serving an eternity in hell. When she turns it down, her client sweetens the pot by offering up the one payment she can't resist—the chance to have a future where she grows old with the woman she loves.
To succeed, she is given three days to track down the White City Vampire, Chicago's most notorious serial killer. If she fails, only hell and heartbreak await.
144 pages, ebook
First published November 7, 2022
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September 26, 2022Source of book: NetGalley (thank you)
Relevant disclaimers: I am Twitter mutuals with the author.
Please note: This review may not be reproduced or quoted, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author.
And remember: I am not here to judge your drag, I mean your book. Books are art and art is subjective. These are just my personal thoughts. They are not meant to be taken as broader commentary on the general quality of the work. Believe me, I have not enjoyed many an excellent book, and my individual lack of enjoyment has not made any of those books less excellent or (more relevantly) less successful.
Further disclaimer: Readers, please stop accusing me of trying to take down “my competition” because I wrote a review you didn’t like. This is complete nonsense. Firstly, writing isn’t a competitive sport. Secondly, I only publish reviews of books in the subgenre where I’m best known (queer romcom) if they’re glowing. And finally: taking time out of my life to read an entire book, then write a detailed review about it that some people on GR will look at would be a profoundly inefficient and ineffective way to damage the careers of other authors. If you can’t credit me with simply being a person who loves books and likes talking about them, at least credit me with enough common sense to be a better villain.
*******************************************
I read this by accident. Or rather, I fully intended to read it, had a little speak at the first chapter and then it was a handful of hours later, I was crying, and I’d finished it.
Even Though I Knew The End is really quite an astonishingly beautiful novella. The pain is real, but so is the love, the ending is perfect, bittersweet in all the right ways, but I also found it genuinely quite tough going in places. I say this not in criticism (I am renownedly a softie) but just in gentle warning because, while I was vaguely aware the setting was not queer-friendly, I wasn’t quite prepared for how dark this would get.
In any case, the setting is magical 1940s Chicago. Basically, what we have here is a Chandler-esque hardboiled detective story in which an exiled mystic turned PI has to track down a serial killer in order to reclaim her soul (which she sacrificed a decade ago to save her family) from a demonic femme fatale. As you might expect from that summary, the stakes are high and personal, all is not what it seems, and solving the mystery will find our heroine, Helen Brandt, embroiled not in trying to save her own future but perhaps the world as well.
There is so much I loved about this story. The setting—while necessarily lightly sketched in terms of its magical power players—is delightful: a genuinely seedy and noir-ish city that allows the reader to revel in all the hardboiled tropes (speakeasys, underground clubs, sapphic ladies in sharps suits calling each other ‘doll’) while also not diminishing the reality of living in a world that where who you are is illegal. Plus I am always personally here for angels, demons, war in heaven type stuff. It’s such a wonderful fit for noir.
Speaking of noir, I really loved how noirish elements are woven into the story without overpowering it. From the job that is more that it seems, to the reluctant PI, to the involvement of multiple interested parties, to the grim and gritty setting, to the gruesome nature of the murders. Where it diverges, however, was that this is a book (and a heroine) full of heart. I actually kind of love Hammett but, even putting he aside the misogyny, they’re cold books: the detective may be someone who walks means street who is himself not mean, but he is usually definitely a dick. Helen, though, for all her cynical talk, is motivated almost entirely by love, specifically her on-going need to protect her family and to have more time with her partner, Edith.
And, oh my God, Helen and Edith. It’s kind of fascinating to me—from a technical relationship-writing perspective—that I was so deeply invested in them because they’re already a long-standing item by the time the book begins and not actually on page together all that much. And, yet … MY FEELINGS. There is such a depth of yearning in this book that I think I would have sold *my* soul to give Helen and Edith a chance to be together.
In terms of what didn’t work for me, I’m havering on my standard “I wish this was longer” complaint that I apparently serve to absolutely single short story or novella I read. To be honest, I think there was just enough detail in terms of the setting, and Helen and Edith’s relationship, that the length mostly contributed to the intensity of the narrative. I could personally have taken more of Helen and Edith—as in, six or seven books more—but I think that’s more about how much I loved them, not that their relationship didn’t feel fully served by the story.
The only person, for me, not fully served was probably Teddy, Helen’s brother with whom she reconciles over the course of the book. Given there’s been ten years since she was exiled from the order where Teddy has now made a success of himself, on account of the whole selling her soul business, their whole conflict-and-reconciliation felt quite rushed. Certainly, too rushed for me to care directly about Teddy’s choices in the book (although I did care indirectly in the sense that anything Helene wanted, I wanted for her). I think I just wanted to know a bit more about what was going on with him: why he would choose the order over his sister for a decade and then abruptly make a different choice.
Also people are, in general, surprisingly relaxed about being ganked out of heaven in this book.
To go back to the elements of the story I personally found difficult to read—mild spoilers to follow—there’s a section that takes Helen and her investigating companion briefly to an asylum. This is sort of standard gothic stuff, but it’s depicted with a bit more brutality, I think, than I was quite prepared for. In particular, it’s an asylum for women, and some of them specifically undergoing aversion therapy for queerness. This isn’t dwelled upon exactly, so much as noted, although Helen does recognise a woman called Harriet (Harry) from the queer bar she frequents. It’s literally a sentence or two, and I don’t think it would be fair to call it gratuitous, but it’s definitely a haunting moment, and one that I’ve felt pretty miserable about ever since reading.
I have, however, come down on the side of understanding its inclusion here: I think it’s a bit too easy to present sneaking around in speakeasys as a glamorous, romantic part of queer history, rather than something that existed as a direct response to oppression. This scene is a reminder that there were—are still, sadly—real stakes to being queer in the world. And, ultimately, it does dovetail in admittedly dark ways with the broader themes of the book: that love, in whatever form it comes, be it divine, familiar, romantic or otherwise, is always an act of courage.
Relevant disclaimers: I am Twitter mutuals with the author.
Please note: This review may not be reproduced or quoted, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author.
And remember: I am not here to judge your drag, I mean your book. Books are art and art is subjective. These are just my personal thoughts. They are not meant to be taken as broader commentary on the general quality of the work. Believe me, I have not enjoyed many an excellent book, and my individual lack of enjoyment has not made any of those books less excellent or (more relevantly) less successful.
Further disclaimer: Readers, please stop accusing me of trying to take down “my competition” because I wrote a review you didn’t like. This is complete nonsense. Firstly, writing isn’t a competitive sport. Secondly, I only publish reviews of books in the subgenre where I’m best known (queer romcom) if they’re glowing. And finally: taking time out of my life to read an entire book, then write a detailed review about it that some people on GR will look at would be a profoundly inefficient and ineffective way to damage the careers of other authors. If you can’t credit me with simply being a person who loves books and likes talking about them, at least credit me with enough common sense to be a better villain.
*******************************************
I read this by accident. Or rather, I fully intended to read it, had a little speak at the first chapter and then it was a handful of hours later, I was crying, and I’d finished it.
Even Though I Knew The End is really quite an astonishingly beautiful novella. The pain is real, but so is the love, the ending is perfect, bittersweet in all the right ways, but I also found it genuinely quite tough going in places. I say this not in criticism (I am renownedly a softie) but just in gentle warning because, while I was vaguely aware the setting was not queer-friendly, I wasn’t quite prepared for how dark this would get.
In any case, the setting is magical 1940s Chicago. Basically, what we have here is a Chandler-esque hardboiled detective story in which an exiled mystic turned PI has to track down a serial killer in order to reclaim her soul (which she sacrificed a decade ago to save her family) from a demonic femme fatale. As you might expect from that summary, the stakes are high and personal, all is not what it seems, and solving the mystery will find our heroine, Helen Brandt, embroiled not in trying to save her own future but perhaps the world as well.
There is so much I loved about this story. The setting—while necessarily lightly sketched in terms of its magical power players—is delightful: a genuinely seedy and noir-ish city that allows the reader to revel in all the hardboiled tropes (speakeasys, underground clubs, sapphic ladies in sharps suits calling each other ‘doll’) while also not diminishing the reality of living in a world that where who you are is illegal. Plus I am always personally here for angels, demons, war in heaven type stuff. It’s such a wonderful fit for noir.
Speaking of noir, I really loved how noirish elements are woven into the story without overpowering it. From the job that is more that it seems, to the reluctant PI, to the involvement of multiple interested parties, to the grim and gritty setting, to the gruesome nature of the murders. Where it diverges, however, was that this is a book (and a heroine) full of heart. I actually kind of love Hammett but, even putting he aside the misogyny, they’re cold books: the detective may be someone who walks means street who is himself not mean, but he is usually definitely a dick. Helen, though, for all her cynical talk, is motivated almost entirely by love, specifically her on-going need to protect her family and to have more time with her partner, Edith.
And, oh my God, Helen and Edith. It’s kind of fascinating to me—from a technical relationship-writing perspective—that I was so deeply invested in them because they’re already a long-standing item by the time the book begins and not actually on page together all that much. And, yet … MY FEELINGS. There is such a depth of yearning in this book that I think I would have sold *my* soul to give Helen and Edith a chance to be together.
In terms of what didn’t work for me, I’m havering on my standard “I wish this was longer” complaint that I apparently serve to absolutely single short story or novella I read. To be honest, I think there was just enough detail in terms of the setting, and Helen and Edith’s relationship, that the length mostly contributed to the intensity of the narrative. I could personally have taken more of Helen and Edith—as in, six or seven books more—but I think that’s more about how much I loved them, not that their relationship didn’t feel fully served by the story.
The only person, for me, not fully served was probably Teddy, Helen’s brother with whom she reconciles over the course of the book. Given there’s been ten years since she was exiled from the order where Teddy has now made a success of himself, on account of the whole selling her soul business, their whole conflict-and-reconciliation felt quite rushed. Certainly, too rushed for me to care directly about Teddy’s choices in the book (although I did care indirectly in the sense that anything Helene wanted, I wanted for her). I think I just wanted to know a bit more about what was going on with him: why he would choose the order over his sister for a decade and then abruptly make a different choice.
Also people are, in general, surprisingly relaxed about being ganked out of heaven in this book.
To go back to the elements of the story I personally found difficult to read—mild spoilers to follow—there’s a section that takes Helen and her investigating companion briefly to an asylum. This is sort of standard gothic stuff, but it’s depicted with a bit more brutality, I think, than I was quite prepared for. In particular, it’s an asylum for women, and some of them specifically undergoing aversion therapy for queerness. This isn’t dwelled upon exactly, so much as noted, although Helen does recognise a woman called Harriet (Harry) from the queer bar she frequents. It’s literally a sentence or two, and I don’t think it would be fair to call it gratuitous, but it’s definitely a haunting moment, and one that I’ve felt pretty miserable about ever since reading.
I have, however, come down on the side of understanding its inclusion here: I think it’s a bit too easy to present sneaking around in speakeasys as a glamorous, romantic part of queer history, rather than something that existed as a direct response to oppression. This scene is a reminder that there were—are still, sadly—real stakes to being queer in the world. And, ultimately, it does dovetail in admittedly dark ways with the broader themes of the book: that love, in whatever form it comes, be it divine, familiar, romantic or otherwise, is always an act of courage.
September 23, 2023
Urban fantasy noir set in the alternate 1940s Chicago (that’s a requisite city to place your hardboiled supernatural gumshoe in, right?) with ritual murders, angels, demons, soul bargains, literal and metaphorical sacrifices and a seemingly doomed love, and done from a female noir perspective which freshens it up a bit.
It’s paced well, giving just enough of this world without bogging down into unnecessary detail, with very monochrome shrouded-in-cigarette-smoke feel, it reads easily. And even if you can guess where it’s headed pretty early on, it doesn’t detract from overall enjoyment.
What does detract a bit, however, is that Helen’s lover, Edith, is simply too good to be true and that entire love story had a bit of an artificial feel to it. And the possibility of a conflict with her brother Ted is resolved a bit too swiftly and too easily — and Ted was not a well-developed character even in the necessarily short novella setting. Plus, overall noir is not very much my jam, although I tried to get past that. The bittersweet ending fit the overall mood of the story though, so that was well done.
Overall not bad, although not something that will stay with me for long.
3.5 stars.
——————
Also posted on my blog.
It’s paced well, giving just enough of this world without bogging down into unnecessary detail, with very monochrome shrouded-in-cigarette-smoke feel, it reads easily. And even if you can guess where it’s headed pretty early on, it doesn’t detract from overall enjoyment.
What does detract a bit, however, is that Helen’s lover, Edith, is simply too good to be true and that entire love story had a bit of an artificial feel to it. And the possibility of a conflict with her brother Ted is resolved a bit too swiftly and too easily — and Ted was not a well-developed character even in the necessarily short novella setting. Plus, overall noir is not very much my jam, although I tried to get past that. The bittersweet ending fit the overall mood of the story though, so that was well done.
Overall not bad, although not something that will stay with me for long.
3.5 stars.
——————
Also posted on my blog.
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October 8, 2021I've been listening to a lot of old Perry Mason books on Audible and Polk's latest novella reminded me vividly of that hard-boiled detective world. Dangerous dames, murders in dark alleys, there's even an old-school insane asylum (and some timely commentary on what kind of women exactly ended up considered "insane".) Add to all of that Polk's trademark queer romance (oh, a sapphic speakeasy! Yes, please!), class politics, and a touch of magic, and you have a great little escape for an afternoon. Vivid and charming with just a touch of noir edge but with way more heart. Put this one on your dance card.
March 4, 2023
“I would do anything for you, and I did.”
This is a gorgeous and heartfelt story, set in historical chicago, where we follow a warlock detective trying to capture a serial killer. This book also just had a lot of things that really worked for me, as a reader. It focuses on a sapphic romance throughout, we get to see the main character’s unconditional love for her little brother constantly, and we get to try to solve a mystery with the ritual killer's name being white city vampire but it involving angels and demons. All really cool and beloved things in my heart and personal taste buzzword wheelhouse!
But this is also a book about sacrifice and love and hope and how those three things can take so many different shapes, yet sometimes they look the very same. I highly recommend this one and pray it will be the first book in a series.
trigger + content warnings: a lot of mentions of homophobia, mention of conversion therapy, institutionalization, talk of loss of a loved one, mention of a car accident involving death, abduction, murder, gore, ritual killings, human sacrifice, a lot of blood depictions, self harm for blood for magic, possession, misogyny, brief mention of throwing up, gun violence involving cops, a lot of smoking + alcohol consumption.
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♡ the group book for Bethany's TorDotComAthon!
Witchmark ★★★
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March 27, 2023Read during the #TransRightsReadathon
A 1930s Chicago noir with magic. Helen is a magic-user who's been expelled from the organisation that runs magic (and that only admits women if they have a male family member to work for) because she sold her soul to save her brother's life. Edith is her lover. Helen hasn't told her that the ten-year lien on her soul is about to fall due. When occult murders start happening, Helen gets made an offer she can't refuse to solve the case.
This is a remarkable read, with a terrifically noir feel (one of the characters is called Marlowe, there's a resonant name for a noir detective story about soul-selling) and amazing atmosphere. There's a strong and vivid sense of place. Also strong is the gross injustice: the misogyny as well as the homophobia. We really see happiness, especially queer female happiness, as something that's snatched, dreamed of, sacrificed for, and that underpins the whole story in the most incredible way. A haunting read.
A 1930s Chicago noir with magic. Helen is a magic-user who's been expelled from the organisation that runs magic (and that only admits women if they have a male family member to work for) because she sold her soul to save her brother's life. Edith is her lover. Helen hasn't told her that the ten-year lien on her soul is about to fall due. When occult murders start happening, Helen gets made an offer she can't refuse to solve the case.
This is a remarkable read, with a terrifically noir feel (one of the characters is called Marlowe, there's a resonant name for a noir detective story about soul-selling) and amazing atmosphere. There's a strong and vivid sense of place. Also strong is the gross injustice: the misogyny as well as the homophobia. We really see happiness, especially queer female happiness, as something that's snatched, dreamed of, sacrificed for, and that underpins the whole story in the most incredible way. A haunting read.
November 26, 2022
This was such a great historical fantasy novella, taking place in 1930's Chicago following a woman who sold her soul in order to save her brothers life. But now the devil she sold her soul too has offered her the opportunity to get her soul back if she catches the White City Vampire, a notorious serial killer. This thrusts her into a battle between angels and demons. And also had an amazing sapphic romance that made my heart hurt
July 19, 2023
I read this in one day so safe to say I enjoyed it! If you’re a fan of the fantasy noir that is The Master of Djinn, you’ll enjoy this as well. A compelling story that doesn’t get too bogged down while also having a lot of heart and investment in the characters.
June 26, 2022
LAST NIGHT AT THE TELEGRAPH CLUB meets season five of Supernatural in this fantastical and sapphic noir. Atmospheric and enthralling, I finished it in one sitting! This is a romance for the ages, and a story I can't wait to read again and again!
So that's my official & quick blurb, but allow me to go into more detail! Some vague overarching spoilers here on out! The reason I used those comps is because this novella is about a lesbian couple in 1930s Chicago who get tangled up in a battle between angels & demons. So we get tidbits of historical fiction aspects about what the lesbian bar scene was like in 1930s Chicago (LNATTC) and also demon deals and angelic hosts (season five of Supernatural.) It was a phenomenal combination that felt like it was written for me specifically and I absolutely loved it!! It's also got the tone of classic noir: very *She was a broad that had legs for days* (but from the lesbian perspective and like also they're a couple and in love), and scenes with our main character, the detective, looking at photos of the crime scene in a dark room. I've never read noir before (partly just avoiding the weird male gazey stuff) so this was an absolute delight. It was also so wonderfully refreshing to have an adult SFF book where the main characters are already a couple and in love and their driving motivation is their love for each other. And sapphic, too!! This book made me want to bang pots and pans together, running up and down the halls of my apartment building screaming about it. For it only being 130 pages, it affected me deeply and will stick with me for a long time! Y'all are not gonna want to miss this one.
So that's my official & quick blurb, but allow me to go into more detail! Some vague overarching spoilers here on out! The reason I used those comps is because this novella is about a lesbian couple in 1930s Chicago who get tangled up in a battle between angels & demons. So we get tidbits of historical fiction aspects about what the lesbian bar scene was like in 1930s Chicago (LNATTC) and also demon deals and angelic hosts (season five of Supernatural.) It was a phenomenal combination that felt like it was written for me specifically and I absolutely loved it!! It's also got the tone of classic noir: very *She was a broad that had legs for days* (but from the lesbian perspective and like also they're a couple and in love), and scenes with our main character, the detective, looking at photos of the crime scene in a dark room. I've never read noir before (partly just avoiding the weird male gazey stuff) so this was an absolute delight. It was also so wonderfully refreshing to have an adult SFF book where the main characters are already a couple and in love and their driving motivation is their love for each other. And sapphic, too!! This book made me want to bang pots and pans together, running up and down the halls of my apartment building screaming about it. For it only being 130 pages, it affected me deeply and will stick with me for a long time! Y'all are not gonna want to miss this one.
August 3, 2025
A thousand dollars, cash … and my soul.
Helen dives into a supernatural turf war in 1930's Chicago when offered a chance to redeem her soul and get out of the devil's bargain made ten years ago to bring back her family from death. Even Though I Knew The End follows Helen through the choices she makes, including even a war between an angel and a demon, all for a chance at continuing to live with her girlfriend, only to realise the war runs deeper than she originally thought and everone around her has their own secrets, including her girlfriend Edith.
I had to stop for a moment. Honestly, what was wrong with me? I knew the answer: Hope was what ailed me, and I had stretched out my hand so fast, I hadn’t thought of anything else.
The noir tone of the novella set in 1930's Chicago adds a lot to the fast-paced plot and interesting premise. The story is event-driven, so the characters don't seem to undergo a lot of growth in the short duration, but it's good to see the sapphic representation. The supernatural elements in the world-building are a bit blocky but serve the plot completely.
On the whole, recommended for the interesting premise and noir detectives tone. I personally am not drawn to the 20's jazz age or the so-called lost generation excessive lifestyle, and apparently don't much like the later noir detectives language either - so this definitely affected my enjoyment of the book.
🌟🌟🌟
[Half a star for the premise and the whole book; Half a star for the characters and their growth; 3/4 star for the plot and themes; 3/4 star for the world-building and description; Half a star for the writing - 3 stars in total.]
Jay Gatsby knew a lot about hope. Hope felt a little painful, on account of it not being a sure thing. In fact, there was almost no hope for him, which made that tiny flashing light all the more precious. I’d read this book a dozen times, two dozen. I always held my breath, waiting for Daisy to come to him. Jay hoped every single time, and I hoped right along with him, even though I knew the end.
Helen dives into a supernatural turf war in 1930's Chicago when offered a chance to redeem her soul and get out of the devil's bargain made ten years ago to bring back her family from death. Even Though I Knew The End follows Helen through the choices she makes, including even a war between an angel and a demon, all for a chance at continuing to live with her girlfriend, only to realise the war runs deeper than she originally thought and everone around her has their own secrets, including her girlfriend Edith.
I had to stop for a moment. Honestly, what was wrong with me? I knew the answer: Hope was what ailed me, and I had stretched out my hand so fast, I hadn’t thought of anything else.
The noir tone of the novella set in 1930's Chicago adds a lot to the fast-paced plot and interesting premise. The story is event-driven, so the characters don't seem to undergo a lot of growth in the short duration, but it's good to see the sapphic representation. The supernatural elements in the world-building are a bit blocky but serve the plot completely.
On the whole, recommended for the interesting premise and noir detectives tone. I personally am not drawn to the 20's jazz age or the so-called lost generation excessive lifestyle, and apparently don't much like the later noir detectives language either - so this definitely affected my enjoyment of the book.
🌟🌟🌟
[Half a star for the premise and the whole book; Half a star for the characters and their growth; 3/4 star for the plot and themes; 3/4 star for the world-building and description; Half a star for the writing - 3 stars in total.]
Jay Gatsby knew a lot about hope. Hope felt a little painful, on account of it not being a sure thing. In fact, there was almost no hope for him, which made that tiny flashing light all the more precious. I’d read this book a dozen times, two dozen. I always held my breath, waiting for Daisy to come to him. Jay hoped every single time, and I hoped right along with him, even though I knew the end.
March 22, 2023
2023 re-read: I liked this even more the second time. There's so much richness to this novella and when you know the end (lol), you can see how Polk lays the foundation for all the revelations to come. This is an excellent novella.
Reading Vlog: https://youtu.be/1awY-IHwbWI
Even Though I Knew the End is a lesbian fantasy noir with a serial killer, set in an alternate (1930's?) magical Chicago with ALL the vibes of the time. I mean, what else do I really need to say??? If that sounds like your thing, definitely pick it up.
It follows a magical investigator asked to look into a murder with cult ties, and things get very complicated very quickly. When all she wants is spend time with her very Catholic girlfriend at an underground lesbian bar. There is a serial killer, paranormal things, and a touching love story in the background. Lots happens very quickly! I received a copy of this book for review via NetGalley, all opinions are my own.
Content warning for homophobia, misogyny, and references to having women committed for related reasons, references to electroshock therapy, murder, gore, possession.
Reading Vlog: https://youtu.be/1awY-IHwbWI
Even Though I Knew the End is a lesbian fantasy noir with a serial killer, set in an alternate (1930's?) magical Chicago with ALL the vibes of the time. I mean, what else do I really need to say??? If that sounds like your thing, definitely pick it up.
It follows a magical investigator asked to look into a murder with cult ties, and things get very complicated very quickly. When all she wants is spend time with her very Catholic girlfriend at an underground lesbian bar. There is a serial killer, paranormal things, and a touching love story in the background. Lots happens very quickly! I received a copy of this book for review via NetGalley, all opinions are my own.
Content warning for homophobia, misogyny, and references to having women committed for related reasons, references to electroshock therapy, murder, gore, possession.
March 31, 2023
okay so in case you weren't aware, you need this: a supernatural noir mystery about a sapphic warlock gumshoe detective who calls her best gal "baby."
it's such an odd fusion of ideas, but oh my god, everything in this little gem of a novel works together beautifully. the noir setting is effortlessly woven into the language of the book, so we are unmistakably here in this early 1940s world of detectives and femme fatales. polk creates immersion yet subverts sexist tropes of the era, focusing on helen and edith, a sapphic couple whose long term relationship appears to be a friendship to the outside world.
i'll admit it took me some time to wrap my head around all the details of the universe. it's 1940s chicago, complete with slang from the era, but fused with a fantasy world of angels (who use they/them pronouns), demons, warlocks, curses. our protagonist, helen, sold her soul to save her brother's life ten years ago, and now her time on earth is up. she's desperate to catch the white city vampire so she can bargain for her soul before it's too late.
one of my favorite elements is how historical queer culture is represented in the book. helen and edith frequent a gay bar where they can be together openly, but otherwise they pretend to be close friends only. they also frequent a diner, where they put on fake wedding bands to help secure their ruse as two innocent hetero wives. these are simply the facts of life, their methods of survival.
and, oh god, what a tragically doomed romance they share. the book is short, but helen's adoration for edith shines brightly, is never questioned. i love reading about a couple who is effortlessly comfortable with one another, yet loves each other with such consistent passion. their whole love story is painfully bittersweet.
it's a quick read, but a beautiful ride. highly recommended.
it's such an odd fusion of ideas, but oh my god, everything in this little gem of a novel works together beautifully. the noir setting is effortlessly woven into the language of the book, so we are unmistakably here in this early 1940s world of detectives and femme fatales. polk creates immersion yet subverts sexist tropes of the era, focusing on helen and edith, a sapphic couple whose long term relationship appears to be a friendship to the outside world.
i'll admit it took me some time to wrap my head around all the details of the universe. it's 1940s chicago, complete with slang from the era, but fused with a fantasy world of angels (who use they/them pronouns), demons, warlocks, curses. our protagonist, helen, sold her soul to save her brother's life ten years ago, and now her time on earth is up. she's desperate to catch the white city vampire so she can bargain for her soul before it's too late.
one of my favorite elements is how historical queer culture is represented in the book. helen and edith frequent a gay bar where they can be together openly, but otherwise they pretend to be close friends only. they also frequent a diner, where they put on fake wedding bands to help secure their ruse as two innocent hetero wives. these are simply the facts of life, their methods of survival.
and, oh god, what a tragically doomed romance they share. the book is short, but helen's adoration for edith shines brightly, is never questioned. i love reading about a couple who is effortlessly comfortable with one another, yet loves each other with such consistent passion. their whole love story is painfully bittersweet.
it's a quick read, but a beautiful ride. highly recommended.
November 23, 2022
It started out interesting and January LaVoy's narration was great as always but I just didn't connect much to this story. There was a lot of plot that never really came together for me and the relationships between the characters felt hollow. This could've been a fun fantasy noire story but it lost me in the middle and never reeled me back in.
April 13, 2023
Stunning. Angels, demons, and romance worth sacrificing your soul for. A quick read for the paranormal reader ✨
March 29, 2023
i love gay people <3
3.5 stars, rtc
——————
i feel like i haven’t read a fantasy or a sapphic book in a while… so im remedying that by reading a sapphic fantasy 👍🏼
3.5 stars, rtc
——————
i feel like i haven’t read a fantasy or a sapphic book in a while… so im remedying that by reading a sapphic fantasy 👍🏼
April 24, 2023
"She had the biggest heart, a tiny bit bruised and full of love. How she wound up with me, I'll never know, but she'd made the last two years an unending song"
An enticing book from start to finish. Even Though I Knew the End is a romantic fantasy noir novella that melds all those genres perfectly. Polk writes in the first person bringing Helen to life and giving the reader a wonderfully painted portrait of a bloomed romance.
I've been making my way through the Nebula finalists and much like the other ones I've read so far, this seems very deserving of a finalist status for the Novella category.
An enticing book from start to finish. Even Though I Knew the End is a romantic fantasy noir novella that melds all those genres perfectly. Polk writes in the first person bringing Helen to life and giving the reader a wonderfully painted portrait of a bloomed romance.
I've been making my way through the Nebula finalists and much like the other ones I've read so far, this seems very deserving of a finalist status for the Novella category.
January 29, 2024
Actual rating is 4.5 stars.
This is a novella that is based in Chicago during the 1930's. In this one we visit Helen who is asked to take a look at a serial killer crime scene. She gets more than she bargained for.
This is one reason I love Goodreads. I was looking for a novella to read and I checked out one of the various lists that Goodreads has on the website. It led me to this novella and all I can say is "Wow". This was so good. This is basically a film noir story that also deals with social issues that are relevant today. Throw in the supernatural with angels and demons while exploring relationships and you get this truly wonderful story. There is a lot that this story tackles but it handles it with no problems. I was so enthralled with everything. The setting, the mystery, and the theme of what we will do for loved ones. Everything captured me and this has vaulted into one of the best novellas that I have ever read. The only flaw is that I wanted more time with the characters so I can get to know them better. I guess that would have been hard to do with all the aspects that were present and this being a novella.
I am not giving this a full five stars because I am being selfish. I want this to be a full length novel. I would have loved to spend more time with the characters and fully dive into the various relationships. That being said this is wonderful story with the mood and the setting, the supernatural which I am a fan of that genre, and the theme of sacrifice for the ones we love. All of these worked into an amazing mix and I loved every second of it.
This is a novella that is based in Chicago during the 1930's. In this one we visit Helen who is asked to take a look at a serial killer crime scene. She gets more than she bargained for.
This is one reason I love Goodreads. I was looking for a novella to read and I checked out one of the various lists that Goodreads has on the website. It led me to this novella and all I can say is "Wow". This was so good. This is basically a film noir story that also deals with social issues that are relevant today. Throw in the supernatural with angels and demons while exploring relationships and you get this truly wonderful story. There is a lot that this story tackles but it handles it with no problems. I was so enthralled with everything. The setting, the mystery, and the theme of what we will do for loved ones. Everything captured me and this has vaulted into one of the best novellas that I have ever read. The only flaw is that I wanted more time with the characters so I can get to know them better. I guess that would have been hard to do with all the aspects that were present and this being a novella.
I am not giving this a full five stars because I am being selfish. I want this to be a full length novel. I would have loved to spend more time with the characters and fully dive into the various relationships. That being said this is wonderful story with the mood and the setting, the supernatural which I am a fan of that genre, and the theme of sacrifice for the ones we love. All of these worked into an amazing mix and I loved every second of it.
March 12, 2023
Świetne to było, nie obraziłabym się, gdyby było dłuższe i bardziej rozbudowane. Ale nawet w takiej nowelkowej formie dostarcza. Lata 40., detektywi w fedorach, queerowe bary, demony, anioły, nic więcej mi nie trzeba - 5/5.
January 9, 2023
The novella was confusing because of the lack of world-building and plot holes, it would have fared better if it was a full-length novel. This had so much potential but in the end, it did not keep me invested in the plot or characters.
July 14, 2025
3.5 ⭐️
Love January Lavoy doing a 1920's narration.
This is queer as all hell and chalk full of demons and angels and all sorts of magical goodness.
However, it just kept falling a bit flat for me. Nothing wrong with the book. Just didn't have something that really gripped me.
Love January Lavoy doing a 1920's narration.
This is queer as all hell and chalk full of demons and angels and all sorts of magical goodness.
However, it just kept falling a bit flat for me. Nothing wrong with the book. Just didn't have something that really gripped me.
December 1, 2022
I listened to an audiobook for this story. The names of the angels were difficult to follow. I couldn't tell who's who. I listened to the part with the killer twice to figure out who. Still unsure.
This story followed Helen. She's a private investigator who deals with angels/demons. There's a serial killer on the loose. The killer takes form in using people. I haven't read this type of books or watch this type of movies lately but I understand it. People are used as hosts for those who exist in some kind of smoke and need a body to walk around and about. The lesbian romance was sweet. It was caring for one another but no steam. I like knowing how the title played in the story. So Helen's life was on the brink of ending because she sold her soul to the devil to save her brother. This job to find the serial killer was dangerous but Helen was offered with the type of payment she couldn't refused. But taking this job, she put her girlfriend Edith's life in danger.
Thank you Libro.fm for the opportunity to read and review!
This story followed Helen. She's a private investigator who deals with angels/demons. There's a serial killer on the loose. The killer takes form in using people. I haven't read this type of books or watch this type of movies lately but I understand it. People are used as hosts for those who exist in some kind of smoke and need a body to walk around and about. The lesbian romance was sweet. It was caring for one another but no steam. I like knowing how the title played in the story. So Helen's life was on the brink of ending because she sold her soul to the devil to save her brother. This job to find the serial killer was dangerous but Helen was offered with the type of payment she couldn't refused. But taking this job, she put her girlfriend Edith's life in danger.
Thank you Libro.fm for the opportunity to read and review!
October 24, 2022
Full Review
Many thanks to Tor Publishing and Raincoast Books for sending me an ARC in exchange for an honest review!
“I never realized how much I was a body until I didn’t have one, how deeply I was my conscious thought until it disappeared, and I was nothing and nowhere and not. And then I was, and that was when I became afraid.”
Trigger/Content Warnings:
Blood, homophobia, gore, violence, guns, religious trauma, conversion/electroshock therapy, smoking, murder, possession, angels/demons, biblical concepts, etc.
Honestly, where do I begin. This was WAYYY too short. Too short, too good. I need more. More of these characters, of this world, of this writing, please.
Even Though I Knew the End follows the story of Helen Brandt in 1940's Chicago. Helen is a magical private eye hired by her (damn sexy) client, Marlowe, to find a serial killer known as the White City Vampire. Despite her initial hesitance, Helen takes the job for the enticing compensation she was promised by Marlowe. This job, doomed from the start, brings Helen more trouble than initially anticipated, and along the way, she uncovers many life-changing truths. With the deadline ending in 3 days, Helen hastily attempts to catch this cold-blooded murderer, all so she can keep those she loves safe. Does she find this White City Vampire? Is the reward enough for what she goes through? Will she be able to keep her family safe?
Hope had me on the edge of my seat. The tiny scraps of hope I held on to, page after page, twist after twist. This book keeps you hoping.
I love it so much. The writing is absolutely phenomenal and it fits the 1940s so perfectly. I was giggling at times with the funny nonchalant descriptions, cue “The space behind Mathilda’s eyes was for rent”. It was descriptive just the right amount, the action was so fluid, and the setting was nicely atmospheric. I love the way C.L. Polk expresses feelings and emotions with such directness. The characters were lovable, and I am desperately hoping and wishing for more Helen and Edith content. And Marlowe side story, I beg.
I wish it was longer, and the plot twist was more subtle. It was fairly easy to put the pieces together from page 53 given that massively clear hint. Otherwise, I thoroughly enjoyed this quick read. I will definitely be reading more of C.L. Polk's works.
If anyone needs a bit more convincing to read this wonderful book, think noir, sapphic, magic, sexy badass women left and right. Oh, and flirting. Loads of that. Had me blushin and shit.
______
update 21/10
I HAVE NO WORDSSS HELEN IM ON MY KNEES FOR YOU
Many thanks to Tor Publishing and Raincoast Books for sending me an ARC in exchange for an honest review!
“I never realized how much I was a body until I didn’t have one, how deeply I was my conscious thought until it disappeared, and I was nothing and nowhere and not. And then I was, and that was when I became afraid.”
Trigger/Content Warnings:
Blood, homophobia, gore, violence, guns, religious trauma, conversion/electroshock therapy, smoking, murder, possession, angels/demons, biblical concepts, etc.
Honestly, where do I begin. This was WAYYY too short. Too short, too good. I need more. More of these characters, of this world, of this writing, please.
Even Though I Knew the End follows the story of Helen Brandt in 1940's Chicago. Helen is a magical private eye hired by her (damn sexy) client, Marlowe, to find a serial killer known as the White City Vampire. Despite her initial hesitance, Helen takes the job for the enticing compensation she was promised by Marlowe. This job, doomed from the start, brings Helen more trouble than initially anticipated, and along the way, she uncovers many life-changing truths. With the deadline ending in 3 days, Helen hastily attempts to catch this cold-blooded murderer, all so she can keep those she loves safe. Does she find this White City Vampire? Is the reward enough for what she goes through? Will she be able to keep her family safe?
Hope had me on the edge of my seat. The tiny scraps of hope I held on to, page after page, twist after twist. This book keeps you hoping.
I love it so much. The writing is absolutely phenomenal and it fits the 1940s so perfectly. I was giggling at times with the funny nonchalant descriptions, cue “The space behind Mathilda’s eyes was for rent”. It was descriptive just the right amount, the action was so fluid, and the setting was nicely atmospheric. I love the way C.L. Polk expresses feelings and emotions with such directness. The characters were lovable, and I am desperately hoping and wishing for more Helen and Edith content. And Marlowe side story, I beg.
I wish it was longer, and the plot twist was more subtle. It was fairly easy to put the pieces together from page 53 given that massively clear hint. Otherwise, I thoroughly enjoyed this quick read. I will definitely be reading more of C.L. Polk's works.
If anyone needs a bit more convincing to read this wonderful book, think noir, sapphic, magic, sexy badass women left and right. Oh, and flirting. Loads of that. Had me blushin and shit.
______
update 21/10
I HAVE NO WORDSSS HELEN IM ON MY KNEES FOR YOU
November 18, 2023
i'm always impressed when an author is able to tell a fully developed story with multiple elements, a complex protagonist, and a fitting conclusion all in less than 150 pages. also really liked the lesbian established relationship and sprinkling of family drama.
November 22, 2022
Hot damn that was incredible. Please let this be the start of a series.
December 7, 2022
For such a short read (or listen in my case), Even Though I Knew the End packs a punch. The worldbuilding is remarkable, the mood enthralling, the story captivating and brimming with twists. It starts three days before Helen Brandt is scheduled to die, having sold her soul ten years ago to save her brother’s life. One last job – going after the White City Vampire – could keep her out of hell and allow her to grow old with Edith, the love of her life.
Set in a magical version of Chicago in the 1940s, this audiobook, beautifully narrated by January LaVoy, has romance, mystery, demons and angels, sapphic love, family trouble, and so much more. It’s gritty and dark and gloriously heart-wrenching. The cover first caught my eye and now that I know what the story is about, I couldn’t imagine a better one for it. Honestly, everything about this novella is outstanding.
I received a copy from Libro.fm and I am voluntarily leaving a review.
Read all my reviews on my blog (and please buy from the affiliation links!): Jude in the Stars
December 26, 2022
This fun, bittersweet novella is a smart genre mashup: a bit noir 1940s mystery, a magical fantasy, angels and demons, and a doomed (?) sapphic romance. It feels like an unfair critique to say you wanted more from a novella, but I would have liked a bit more room to get to know the characters and for the mystery to unfold. As it is, it's still very much worth your time, especially as I think Polk does a great job creating a moody period piece appropriate atmosphere. I liked the little details of place and the 40s slang, not overdone just enough to give it flavour.
January 22, 2023
welcome to 202-Queer 🌈✨, the year where i only read queer books and finally have fun 🌈✨
there was...a lot going on in this.
demons? angels? murder mystery? selling souls? MICHAEL???
name it and we got it.
i wasn't really that invested in the murder mystery or any of the paranormal stuff - though i love me some good soul selling business.
but it was a quick read and fun and the sapphics were adorable 💞
there was...a lot going on in this.
demons? angels? murder mystery? selling souls? MICHAEL???
name it and we got it.
i wasn't really that invested in the murder mystery or any of the paranormal stuff - though i love me some good soul selling business.
but it was a quick read and fun and the sapphics were adorable 💞
May 17, 2023
What a delightful mix between Supernatural, a detective/noir story and a pinch of a romance!
Helena is a mage in a 1940s alternate Chicago where angels and demons are real. When she was much younger, she sold her soul in order to get her brother back after a dreadful car accident. Shunned by magical society, she became a PI. Now, one of her clients is offering her THE deal: find the notorious serial killer, the White City Vampire, and not only get paid in money but get the damned soul back!
So of course she accepts. Only to discover that there is way more to it than a simple whodunnit and that many forces are involved in the struggle.
I loved that there was a little bit of everything in here: a noir sort of urban fantasy, a sweet because not overdrawn romance, many magical elements and some nice commentary on what has been done to homosexual people, such as conversion therapy (which, in some places, still is done, unfortunately).
The writing was excellent as was the characterization! I mean, you can pretty much guess in the first minute what it will likely all come down to and yet I was utterly invested and hoped fervently that there was a way out. Whether there was or not, I shall not spoiler.
Plus, the worldbuilding was rather wonderful so I can see me reading more stories taking place in this world's Chicago if the author chooses to write more.
Like I said: delightful!
Helena is a mage in a 1940s alternate Chicago where angels and demons are real. When she was much younger, she sold her soul in order to get her brother back after a dreadful car accident. Shunned by magical society, she became a PI. Now, one of her clients is offering her THE deal: find the notorious serial killer, the White City Vampire, and not only get paid in money but get the damned soul back!
So of course she accepts. Only to discover that there is way more to it than a simple whodunnit and that many forces are involved in the struggle.
I loved that there was a little bit of everything in here: a noir sort of urban fantasy, a sweet because not overdrawn romance, many magical elements and some nice commentary on what has been done to homosexual people, such as conversion therapy (which, in some places, still is done, unfortunately).
The writing was excellent as was the characterization! I mean, you can pretty much guess in the first minute what it will likely all come down to and yet I was utterly invested and hoped fervently that there was a way out. Whether there was or not, I shall not spoiler.
Plus, the worldbuilding was rather wonderful so I can see me reading more stories taking place in this world's Chicago if the author chooses to write more.
Like I said: delightful!
July 2, 2025
If Supernatural was a book.
I ended up really liking this, which is no surprise since I loved The Midnight Bargain. But the ending...why is it giving what the hell...It felt like all of that was for nothing.
Everything else was good though, starting with the writing style, then the characters, plot and worldbuilding. I wouldn't have minded if the worldbuilding was a bit heavier, to be honest, but since it's a novella, there was enough of it. The audiobook was nice too, but I think I should've read this myself, mayhaps upon reread I will.
I ended up really liking this, which is no surprise since I loved The Midnight Bargain. But the ending...why is it giving what the hell...It felt like all of that was for nothing.
Everything else was good though, starting with the writing style, then the characters, plot and worldbuilding. I wouldn't have minded if the worldbuilding was a bit heavier, to be honest, but since it's a novella, there was enough of it. The audiobook was nice too, but I think I should've read this myself, mayhaps upon reread I will.
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March 25, 2023
I love.
Enough said.
CL Polk is easily one of my most favoritist authors, and I cannot believe that I did not read this book when I had the ARC. Or immediately after buying the book. It's so good, and while many novellas try to cram too much into a brief timespan, Polk makes every single sentence count with such deliciously breathtaking craft.
Anywho. 1941 Chicago. Lesbians. Murder. Magic. Secret societies. And dangerous bargains. What's not to love?
Enough said.
CL Polk is easily one of my most favoritist authors, and I cannot believe that I did not read this book when I had the ARC. Or immediately after buying the book. It's so good, and while many novellas try to cram too much into a brief timespan, Polk makes every single sentence count with such deliciously breathtaking craft.
Anywho. 1941 Chicago. Lesbians. Murder. Magic. Secret societies. And dangerous bargains. What's not to love?
Read
June 28, 2023I can't get over how Polk gave a supernatural alternate history murder mystery novella one of the most romantic endings I've ever read. I'm a fan.
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