Forgive Me Father

The Shadows of Darkness Universe #1

by Katerina St. Clair

In the quiet town of Idlewood, twenty-year-old Eden Faulkner is known for her unwavering devotion to her Catholic faith. Raised in the shadow of the town's church, she has always sought solace and guidance within its hallowed walls.

When Father Roman Briar arrives at St. Michaels, his charisma and mysterious presence immediately captivate Eden. As their friendship deepens into forbidden territory, Eden finds herself ensnared in a web of desire and deceit. Roman, too, struggles with his vows, torn between his sacred duty and the intense attraction he feels for Eden.

Caught between their faith and their desires, Eden and Roman must confront the consequences of their choices. Will they find redemption in each other's arms, or will their illicit affair lead them down a path of irreparable sin?

In this provocative, dark tale, author Katerina St Clair explores the fragile boundaries between faith, passion, duty and temptation. Forgive Me Father is a mesmerizing journey into the heart of a young woman's struggle with love, faith, and her dark secrets better left buried.

Genres: Dark Romance, Romance, Dark, BDSM, Forbidden Romance, Smut, Forced Proximity

475 pages, Paperback

Published September 30, 2024

About the author

Katerina St Clair is an international best-selling author of fantasy, dark romance, and dystopian stories. She loves creating rich, immersive worlds where her readers can get lost in adventure, drama, and intrigue. Her books are filled with unforgettable characters, gripping twists, and the kind of storytelling that keeps fans coming back for more. Writing is her way of bringing new worlds to life and sharing them with readers who love finding an escape.

Reviews

[isy · Rating 1 out of 5]

insta EVERYTHING let me just vomit.

also has a writing style i dont like where they show and then tell so everything is basically being repeated.

[Mazz · Rating 1 out of 5]

Buckle up, kiddos, I'm about to drag this book as much as the author dragged men and Catholicism.

Katerina St. Clair is a horrible writer. I'm going to flat-out say that with no care in the world. I nearly pissed my pants from laughing so hard when I saw her bio, saying she's on "an academic path toward becoming a creative writing instructor at the higher education level." That statement alone should say enough. The pretentiousness oozes out of her shitty writing. Why couldn't you just say you're a creative writing major or that you want to organize and teach future writers? It is a straightforward statement that doesn't need to be fluffed.

That should've been my first sign.

On a technical aspect, her writing is pitiful. I'm actually concerned for the young writers who have her as an instructor. Now, I am a dark romance girlie and love taboo subjects. However, there is a difference between using a group as an agent to create a dynamic plot and completely dragging and generalizing said group(s). She used and exploited stereotypes to create her plot. I don't mean in just one character and in just one scene. Every single character who was an active Catholic was regarded as a malicious figure. Not only that, but all the men were misogynistic and abusive--including the "good guys." This is the definition of glamorizing and romanticizing abuse. I am not the biggest fan of the Catholic Church, and, sometimes, I just want to throat punch a man for breathing the wrong way. However, I am fully aware that not all Catholics and/or men are bad. Religion is beautiful, and men are worthy. I did not feel that consideration at all when it came to this book.

For someone who had an editor, the amount of writing errors I found was abysmal. Examples include using the wrong "cue" (page 16 in paperback), "not doubt" (74), "closely looked" (268), "screech of metal on metal" for scraping a ROCK on a car door (297), and "Roman's gold ring glints from under my shirt" (403). And that's just on word choice! There were also several instances where the author repeated the exact same detail within the same page, if not a few sentences! An example of this is on page 291: "I tuck the phone under my thigh... tucking the phone under my thigh." Did no one read the final copy? If you're this absent when it comes to basic details, then you sure as hell can't carry a plot. I have never read an independent or published author who made a mistake like that. You know where I have read it? ChatGPT and other AIs. This is not me calling that fact; however, this is extremely suspicious.

Another point I want to make: I do not believe all the art belongs to the author or that she's being completely transparent. There are at least two pictures where two different characters have a missing finger.

All in all, this book is not worth it. Frankly, neither is the author at this rate. Consider a career change.

[ChasxSabri💗🫧 · Rating 2 out of 5]

Before reading: This is one of my most anticipated reads of the year
I need it in my hands NOW

After reading: DNF @ 32%……1.5 stars
Kind of sad because I was anticipating reading this but it’s not that good honestly
The art throughout the book is good, but everything else is….. not
For a book that’s 478 pages, I would have expected more build up and tension between the FMC and the MMC but there was little to none of that; very much insta-lust
Like there’s obviously sexual tension, but I need a little more, you know?
It also feels like the author was trying to put the most traumatic things on her characters and it’s just felt…..excessive

[purlpur · Rating 4 out of 5]

американські гіркі прийшлись мені до смаку 😏
спочатку думаєш, що читаєш чергову історію про розпусного священника. так, у ліжку з отцем браяром пекельно гаряче. його шафа з іграшками, наручниками та іншим інвентарем для бдсм розваг точно багатьом сподобається. і він дуже вправно усім цим користується 🥵 чисто священник, якого ми заслужили 😈

а потім обливають крижаною водою у вигляді важкої, аб'юзивної, жорстокої та травмуючої історії життя іден. з фоновим розкриттям питань торгівлі людьми, діяльності релігійного культу та жахливих стосунків батьків і дітей 😐

от і намагаєшся балансувати між цим контрастом протягом усієї книги. але це тільки плюс. драматичний сюжет мені завжди сподобається більше, ніж просто історія для розваги.

щодо любовної лінії. роман та іден звичайно спекотна парочка, але окрім бурхливої хімії в сексі, розвитку інших аспектів їх стосунків можна багато не очікувати. їх об'єднали однакові вподобання в ліжку та синдром рятівника у романа. ну і най буде. це не завадило персонажам сподобатись мені 🌚

плюсом зіграло й те, що я не люблю читати анотації, тригери, цитати, а бажаю мінімально знати про книгу, яку збираюсь читати. мені було достатньо пари тропів, які імпонують, і більше ніяких очікувань. тому, майже нічого не знаючи про книгу, вона змогла мене приємно здивувати.
але, є й погана новина. якщо ви прочитали цей відгук перед читанням самої книги, то вже знаєте про неї більше. шош, сорі 🤭

[Willie · Rating 1 out of 5]

1⭐️. DNF after 5 chapters.

I had high hopes for this because of how beautiful the cover is. Not for lack of trying but I can’t go on any longer because of where things are after only a few chapters.

WHERE IS THE SIZZLING TENSION / BUILDUP?

Everything is insta. Insta lust. Insta protective. Insta possessive. Insta while still dealing with my nasty trauma I lust over the 1st broad shoulder man I came across.

I wish MMC and FMC go through lengths resisting each other bc of their own demons. Each chapter gets worst. Until they can’t fight their passion for each other any longer. But nahhh!

The writing is not bad , the set up is.

I’m sorry but when you got SA-ed, you use physical pain to deal with it. and just now went through a humiliation….then, you feel aroused and butterflies bc the hot guy you JUST MET dominately convince you to let him finger you to orgasm!?! Whaaaat the f! Where are your doubts, lady????… you should avoid men at all cost at this point, until he walks through glass to show you he is a good guy. Wasted potential :(.

The mentioned hot guy is the priest btw. Shame on you! He gets all possessive too after conversing with her for like 2 times. He speaks like “I am no stranger to temptation” “do it or I’ll do it for you.”

It’s not a spoiler since all of this and more are on the 1st 4 chapters. Hope for a better book next.

[Brianna Fenty · Rating 2 out of 5]

well that certainly was a book with a priest in it

[Katie · Rating 1 out of 5]

what the fuck

[clare ౨ৎ · Rating 1 out of 5]

book was so bad i might actually show up to church this sunday.

[Jennifer Colvin]

DNF at 61%

I’m easily entertained and usually let a lot pass but this finally got under my skin. It’s like the author forgot things as they wrote…? Was AI used during writer’s block? I found myself confused in some of the sex scenes and sometimes saying, “that’s physically impossible.” I finally threw in the towel after the MMC insisted on a safe word then blatantly disregards it. What was the point?

[Sahara · Rating 1 out of 5]

Was this written by AI because what the actual fuck

[Amber Neal · Rating 1 out of 5]

So many plot holes??? And the AI art??? Girl, what was the vibe here?

[april ♡ probably reading smut - safety reviews]

DNF. After getting with the hero, the heroine gives another guy a BJ. Not my idea of a good book. 🙂‍↔️🤮

[Käthe · Rating 1 out of 5]

I need to gather my thoughts. Most of them are negative.

[Gwen · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF - there is only one “Priest”

Nope, this ain’t the one

The writing is not good
The pace is worse
The plot is just so random??? Everything felt like a shock factor instead of intentional decisions for the plot

Honestly wish I called it quits sooner

Sierra Simone put something special in her book, this author did not find that something

[Stephane · Rating 1 out of 5]

There are so many things I could say, but right now all I have is this book might be the worst thing I’ve ever picked up.
The writing, the grammar, the repetitive details and every man being the most toxic thing on the planet.

AND THE FUCKING IUD SHE HANDED HIM?!

Someone please scrub my brain with bleach.

[Allison McCracken · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I saw Katerina was writing a dark romance I screamed. Forgive me father I think will be a new fav in the dark romance community. Personally I think she managed to find a good balance between the smut and the storyline of the book. This will be a book I recommend to freaking everyone.

Forgive me father, for I have sinned 💜

[The Polished Diamond · Rating 1 out of 5]

Unfortunately this book was miss after miss for me in a story that I thought was going to be a total hit for me. I tried so hard to keep giving it a chance because I can tend to get attached to characters even when a story isn’t working for me. After a while, though, the amount of scoffs and eye rolls at where the story continued to go was just excessive.

And if I had to choose one word to describe the whole book that would be the word. Excessive.

This book felt like someone sat down and made a list of every external and internal trauma that exists and said, okay. Every time another ridiculously outlandish trauma came up I couldn’t help but scoff. Another one? Really? You couldn’t weed out one trauma idea? You had to include them all?

Then let’s talk about the actual romance. How to even talk about this romance. I thoroughly enjoyed the book “Priest” so I was positive I was going to enjoy this book. But this romance lacked all the tension, all the push and pull that I expected from this type of forbidden romance. Not only that, but the fmc had experienced extreme sexual trauma and was exhibiting trauma responses to even gentle touches and the MMC bulldozed into incredibly rough sexual encounters with her right away. Cringeworthy, flinch inducing experiences to read. There was nothing sexy about how often she bled from their encounters due to his roughness and the fact that her body was still healing from an assault. At one point, he forced a safe word onto her and then disregarded it when she used it. I totally understand that some of this was included in the TWs and I’ve read plenty of noncon and dubcon scenes that totally worked and I enjoyed. But there was something about the way these particular scenes were written that made me totally lose interest in the MMC in those moments. I would say so extremely lose interest that I didn’t believe the love story as it unfolded.

Again, the word to describe so much of this book is just totally excessive. You can execute forbidden romance, dubcon, even noncon without going overboard and this book didn’t accomplish that. A ton of the side plots should have been cut, they were so ridiculous and absolutely pointless. I feel like at most you can get away with one drama centric trauma subplot just to keep things interesting, but this book had at least like 5? So silly.

[J]

Oh, well, well, well, what do we have here? Forgive Me Father—and not just because of my book-buying habits lately. 

This book is exactly what I’ve been craving since I read “Lessons in Sin” and thought, “Yep, I definitely need more of this in my life.” or so I thought. The cover art? Absolutely gorgeous. It’s giving me major "this book is going to be hot" vibes. 

The alternating POVs between him and her are kinda fun, though it does feel a little repetitive at times. One chapter is his, the next is hers—same events, just from different angles. I think they could’ve just picked up from where his POV ended and kept that momentum going.

It started so well and gave me high expectations, but then it just went downhill. The instalove didn’t help either. I’m more of a slow burn kind of gal, so I missed that delicious tension I loved in “Lessons in Sin”. The kind where you're screaming at the characters to just give in already. That’s the good stuff, and it just wasn’t here. So, I’m still on the lookout for a priest smut that’s as good as “Lessons in Sin”. Nothing compares to it so far.

And can we talk about the forbidden aspect? The priestly vibes, the collar, the cloak—chef’s kiss. Although... he’s not really rocking the full look here. Maybe it’s just me, but I was kind of hoping for more of that “I shouldn’t be feeling this way” energy. Oh, and did I mention that he is a deliciously sinful, tattooed bad boy? Yeah, definitely not the kind of guy you'd expect to be a priest, but here we are, and I'm absolutely here for it.

All in all, if you're into the genre, it’s definitely worth a read. But if you’re expecting Lessons in Sin-level intensity, you might find yourself wishing for a bit more

[Sarah · Rating 1 out of 5]

*audiobook

absolutely zero build up.
zero chemistry.
zero tension
plot is clunky.
characters are not well written.
I was also bored.

[nineinchnovels · Rating 5 out of 5]

Book Spotlight • Dark Romance 🖤 - Forgive Me Father by @yourlocalwriterz
Out NOW - KU

You guys know me, I really admire a good story with interesting characters and a good plot….but once you add the decadent spice and religious trauma and imagery — LORD HAVE MERCY.

Here you have Eden who has just moved back in with her religious Catholic family that harbors a lot of trauma and secrets. To the extent of what? Eden had no idea. Unfortunately as it goes, their house is their rules and therefore to Sunday church she goes. What she didn’t expect was …*knuckle bites* a new priest by the name of Roman who is as unholy looking in all the best ways, Lucifer himself wouldn’t be able to resist. The darkest secrets of them all lays in this church, and reckoning is …coming.

*screams

when I tell you, I was 💫 kicking and screaming 💫 like a little school girl while reading this book is an understatement, and I might remind you that I haven’t had a book do that to me ever.

I love this book with my whole heart, body and soul and I cannot wait to see what’s next in this universe.

Be mindful of the trigger warnings. 🗡️🖤

[Cait :) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Forbidden. Thrilling. Dark. A wild ride. Immersive.

and so much more. If you love forbidden dark spicy things then this book will be exactly what you need. A priest and his alter server learning just how much goes into serving.😉 I will say that this book has a trigger list that you should not ignore before proceeding to read! Always check for your own well being❤️

This book had me on my toes the entire time full of twists I didn’t expect meeting an end so perfectly. Roman the man that his is knows how to breathe air back into someone who desperately needs it. Eden with a past she’s drowning in with no life raft in sight.

I couldn’t recommend this book more. Kat does it again. A way with words and spinning a story that you find yourself so emerged in you lose track of time.

[Mikaela Jade · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW, this book was such a highly anticipated read for me and it did NOT disappoint!!

In this story, we follow our FMC, Eden Faulkner, as she comes back home from college suddenly and attends Sunday mass with her “picture perfect” family. As she attends, the new priest is introduced. Father Roman Friar is a handsome, 6’4’’, tatted, and mysterious man. As Eden and Roman start getting to know each other, a forbidden romance begins and lines start to blur.

This is my first priest romance and it was everything. This book was the perfect amount of spice, plot, and action. It was definitely darker than I thought but it came together seamlessly. I cannot wait to see what else comes from this universe.

[Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

90% smut with religious trauma?! Count me in. I loved reading this. The suspense, the smut, everything was fantastic! I had been counting down the days until I could get my hands on this book and immediately fell in love. I need more!!

[Katie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Forgive me, Father, for reading this book. It was truly god-awful.

You know what I'm going to say, but I'll have to say it anyway: I came across the author's promotion of Forgive Me Father online and found myself intrigued by the idea of it. Of course, what happened was what happens so often when authors promote their own books on TikTok/instagram: Barely any of what was said is actually book-accurate. I always wonder what authors have to gain by mispromoting their work, and my inability to make sense of it is perhaps why I've fallen for it more than once. In addition to suffering from the massive dissonance between promoted and actual content, Forgive Me Father is terribly written and riddled with mistakes. Throughout the reading process, I considered abandoning this book countless times, but ultimately, I was invested enough in the concept and the aesthetics of the story that I ended up finishing it. I'd love to say it was a rage-read, but honestly, by the end of it, I had no emotions left.

The first issue are the characters. They are flimsy, one-dimensional things whose personalities and actions lack any sort of cohesion. They don't seem to have any thoughts beyond what little is immediately necessary to act and react in scenes. They have no real internal monologue, and they act out every thought that occurs to them immediately instead of contemplating and pacing themselves like a real person would. This same inability is transferred to their interaction with other characters. Literally every conversation is incredibly unnatural and melodramatic, almost as if you're reading a teenager's first attempt at a fanfiction. Consequently, the romance is insta in every way; there is no connection, no chemistry, nothing at all that would lead to or explain the protagonists' relationship.

The second issue is the plot. Roughly half of Forgive Me Father is smut. Personally, I think that's quite alright, as that's what most people are in for. Most of it is decent, but I will say that I liked the first third or so much better than what comes after; eventually, it just becomes a bit too problematic. Still, the author is okay at writing porn, and I wish she'd just stuck to that instead of trying to insert some sorry excuse for a plot, which turned out to be utterly nonsensical. I am genuinely convinced that she had this pornographic idea of a priest and his altar sever in mind that she was desperately trying to situate within the confined security of a publishable story. She then proceeded to make up the most dramatic plot she could think of and wrote it out, never stopping to assess whether that plot is in any way, shape, or form logical.

The most disturbing part, I think, is the fact that the plot St. Clair chose (not) to focus on is a child trafficking ring within the church. If you're going to choose such a heavy and deeply important topic, you can't just exploit it for filler content. You've got to handle it with the gravity and care it deserves, and your characters cannot just forget about it when they want to get it on every time they lay eyes on each other. Frankly, it would have been more respectful to choose a different plot or leave it out altogether.

Additonally, I am unsure why the author chose to incorporate religion into her story if she never meant to do anything with it. I understand the appeal the thrill of a forbidden relationship holds, and surprisingly, I enjoyed the spicy scenes set in the church. But if your male protagonist is a priest, it would be beneficial to have him contemplate, doubt, struggle with his faith instead of getting a girl off within a day of meeting her for no apparent reason. We never learn why Roman became a priest, we do not know anything about his relationship with god, we do not get any insights into his everyday life within the church. Nothing is said about his feelings for Eden or whether he struggles with them, as they are in direct conflict with his promise to god. He is certainly aware of said conflict, as he mentions it often, but it is not contemplated beyond the fact that it exists. One reason for this might be that the author failed to do her research. Now, I do not want to accuse anyone of anything, and I understand that the author is American and that Catholicism in the States is different than it is here in Europe. Yet, as someone who grew up Catholic (and was an altar server for quite a while -- a role that is almost exclusively filled by children, mind you), I cannot help but notice that all information the author volunteers is either very superficial or not quite correct. I wonder if she's not religious and could not be bothered to do any research at all, or if she is religious and simply assumed all readers would be knowledgeable enough about Catholicism to fill in all the gaps she left in her narration.

The worst part, I think, is that this could have been such a good book. The erotic premise of a priest falling for his adult (!) altar server fits the dark romance genre well, and the addition of a (sub-)plot about his discovery of a trafficking ring in the church, if handled correctly, could have made it an excellent thriller. Instead, we got this half-baked mess of a book I genuinely would not recommend to anyone.

[Jenn (The Book Refuge) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a thrill ride I was not expecting. I knew it would be dark and kinky, and a smidgen taboo and it delivered in spades.

I wish it wasn't *quite* so insta-lusty, but later on in the story, there was a pretty solid reason. It just went real hard, real fast. Pun intended.

I was also moved by the B plot. AKA, the stuff that wasn't romance. It was gritty and had very high stakes.

Overall, I think certain elements could have been balanced better. Like what Roman was a priest to begin with, but I understand not wanting to go into his faith *too much* based on everything else happening. Yet we ended every chapter with a Bible verse? 🤷‍♀️ So I felt like the religious elements were *only* added to be sacrilegious... that's kinda what I mean about balance.

I wanted more contrast between the God Roman finds worthy of devotion and service to VS. how David and his cronies were perverting religion. I wanted to see that come through. Instead, we just bastardized it whole cloth. Which is fine, I guess, just less interesting.

I think when using religion to be *taboo* or *edgy* but not offering contrast or showing helpful parts of religion, like why people find solace and comfort from it.. well, it's lazy.

Is Roman just a chump for believing it? Is Eden misguided to blame religion for everything bad in her life? Their struggles could have met in the middle, and they could each get a new perspective that way.

Anyway, I didn't actually mean to go so into it. I just saw more potential in those areas because I think the author told a great story. I will read more from her, and I think that's one area that would have pushed me over the top with this one.

Oh, and yes... it was as steamy and sexy as the teasers proclaimed. 😉😅

4 Stars
4.5 on the spice scale

CW: SA, parental abuse, human trafficking, sacrilegious acts, violence, murder, kidnapping, drugging, and more.

[S. Alberto ⁻⁷ (yearning) · Rating 2 out of 5]

“I will kiss the ground you walk on, Eden Faulkner, so long as you can handle the demons that trail after me,”

I went into Forgive Me Father expecting dark intrigue and compelling tension, but what I got instead was a whole lot of insta-lust. The premise had potential, but the pacing of the romance (if you can even call it that) moved way too fast for my taste. The characters barely had time to develop any real dynamic before they were already consumed by their attraction, which made it hard for me to feel fully invested in their connection.

There were moments where the atmosphere and setting had promise, but the rushed nature of the relationships overshadowed everything else. I typically enjoy slow-burn tension, or at least some buildup, but this felt more like instant infatuation without enough depth. The writing itself was fine, but the lack of emotional development left me feeling disconnected from the story.

While I can see why some might enjoy the dark, fast-paced energy of this book, it just didn’t work for me. If you love instant, intense attraction with a dark edge, this might be your thing—but personally, I prefer a bit more tension and development before the characters throw themselves at each other.

[Beth · Rating 2 out of 5]

the most unrealistic insane drama that just went from one ridiculous thing to the next it was actually insufferable to read. writing was shit (apart from the porn), plot clearly was not thought out (apart from the porn) and it seemed the author thought of every possible traumatic thing and shoved it into the book but i read the whole thing so thats my fault isnt it but great porn i guess. 2⭐️

[Annie East · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5⭐️⭐️⭐️….. 😮‍💨 where do I even begin. This book was unexpectedly good. The plot was thick and Father Briar was even thicker.

[Jenna · Rating 1 out of 5]

That was easily the worst fucking book I have ever read. This made Credence look like a goddamn self help book. The author should receive federal jail time. Wanted to DNF 12% in and honestly I should have. Utter garbage.

[𖤓𝔐𝔦𝔰𝔞☽ · Rating 1 out of 5]

Dnf at 85%. I just couldn’t with the AI. If the author can blatantly use AI art in their book, I know they used AI to write this mess.