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Seasons
134 pages, Paperback
Published September 27, 2024
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
August 15, 2025
Full video review is available on @DarinasReads booktok.
It reads like a blog and brings all the emotions associated with it. I felt the urge to comment so many times as if it were a Facebook post or a blog post. I had to stop myself from messaging the author directly more than once.
The need to discuss, to share, to connect was overwhelming.
I felt this way because it resonated with me on so many levels!
I have a feeling that what I was reading was like a diary, notes made from time to time and gathered together. The reason I think that it the case it’s because there are many repeating statements and phrases. The timeline in the pregnancy part is also not exactly linear as if the author went with the flow of her thoughts at the moment of a current note and then continued with the next thought in her next note after a break. Thus repetitive statements and zigzags in the timeline.
It’s honest. Stright forward. No munching words. No going around trying to stay in the line of socially expected behavior and phrases.
How many women out there who thought that they hated being pregnant and they waited for it to be finally over? How many of them were able to voice it out loud? That’s frowned upon. That’s unimaginable. Women are supposed to be flying like beautiful fairies while bloated and nauseous. No whining. You are supposed to be happy. All the time. Pain, lack of sleep, loosing oneself, mother guilt, hormonal changes - all irrelevant because it’s not about a woman any more. It’s about a baby. And a woman is expacted be happy.
Maria Koval gave the voice to all women who are or were struggling through pregnancy and postpartum.
It’s the truth of the struggles of suffering from depression while being pregnant with twins. About the toll on a body and mind it takes. About the society pressure, about how the expectation doesn’t always line up with the reality. About constant pain. Oh, the unbearable pain for 24/7 for 9 months… This I know of from personal experience. The postpartum, the loosing myself and struggle to find myself in motherhood, the mom guilt, constant worry, the most severe sleep deprivation, zero help, loosing people who don’t and will never get it…
A lot of it resonated with me. At times I had to pause because it all was a bit too much - I had to process my own emotions first to move forward with reading.
Since this is a memoir of a New Yorker who went through a high risk pregnancy with twins and writes how much the hospital helped her, I can’t help but wonder why the author didn’t include the name of the hospital at least in the “Helpful resources” part. I am sure this information would be helpful to any reader who is going through a similar journey. It’s referred simply as “the hospital”.
Maria here has an open question:
“I wonder if all the mothers struggling the same. I wonder if all the moms are going through so much. And if so, why isn’t anyone screaming about their experience?” (Maria Koval, Seasons)
My answer is Yes! Maria, you are not alone in this. You felt alone in your isolation caring for your babies. But you were never alone in this. None of mothers are. We all struggle to accommodate, to adjust, to adapt, to find ourselves in this constantly changing and challenging environment of motherhood.
Why are women silent? Society rules. For all the openness and acceptance, the society is still not ready to openly discuss all struggles the motherhood brings. Well, we do discuss it but only in hush-hush tones and only with other mothers. Never with pregnant. Never with young girls who say they want kids. The society romanticizes motherhood as a whole for them. I feel like this is the world’s largest secret that all mothers agreed to keep hushed and one has to become a mother to learn and be privy to this secret club.
And when a shell-shocked new mother reaches finally for help thinking that she is the problem because that’s not what a motherhood supposed to be like, not like it was portrayed in all those fancy articles… what does this club do in general? Pat her on a shoulder and tell in a condescending tone to hang on because we all have been there and it they actually had worse and it gets harder when they grow. Well, we all were there indeed. Some had easier, some harder. But… will this really help this new mother? Instead of patting and sharing your scary stories why not reaching out and help?
We need stories like this. We, women and girls, our society need honest voices like this. Yes, it contradicts the carefully curated image of being a mother. But is this curated image is 100% true? For many mothers out there it is not. The truth is not as beautiful. And it needs to be said to help new mothers to cope and adjust.
Thank you, Maria, for sharing your journey - struggles and all. And remember from me, mother of two special need kids with small age difference and NO help: not only I get it all and I will hold your hand while saying this: I promise you it DOES get better and easier. And you WILL find your new self. It is not going to be the same Maria, the one before kids. You will create a new version of yourself that you will love more. You will find it in you and around you. You will build it like a unique creation made from scattered Lego block. It’s all out there. You will find these blocks together with your kids and you will build it. One day at a time.
Just wait.
It reads like a blog and brings all the emotions associated with it. I felt the urge to comment so many times as if it were a Facebook post or a blog post. I had to stop myself from messaging the author directly more than once.
The need to discuss, to share, to connect was overwhelming.
I felt this way because it resonated with me on so many levels!
I have a feeling that what I was reading was like a diary, notes made from time to time and gathered together. The reason I think that it the case it’s because there are many repeating statements and phrases. The timeline in the pregnancy part is also not exactly linear as if the author went with the flow of her thoughts at the moment of a current note and then continued with the next thought in her next note after a break. Thus repetitive statements and zigzags in the timeline.
It’s honest. Stright forward. No munching words. No going around trying to stay in the line of socially expected behavior and phrases.
How many women out there who thought that they hated being pregnant and they waited for it to be finally over? How many of them were able to voice it out loud? That’s frowned upon. That’s unimaginable. Women are supposed to be flying like beautiful fairies while bloated and nauseous. No whining. You are supposed to be happy. All the time. Pain, lack of sleep, loosing oneself, mother guilt, hormonal changes - all irrelevant because it’s not about a woman any more. It’s about a baby. And a woman is expacted be happy.
Maria Koval gave the voice to all women who are or were struggling through pregnancy and postpartum.
It’s the truth of the struggles of suffering from depression while being pregnant with twins. About the toll on a body and mind it takes. About the society pressure, about how the expectation doesn’t always line up with the reality. About constant pain. Oh, the unbearable pain for 24/7 for 9 months… This I know of from personal experience. The postpartum, the loosing myself and struggle to find myself in motherhood, the mom guilt, constant worry, the most severe sleep deprivation, zero help, loosing people who don’t and will never get it…
A lot of it resonated with me. At times I had to pause because it all was a bit too much - I had to process my own emotions first to move forward with reading.
Since this is a memoir of a New Yorker who went through a high risk pregnancy with twins and writes how much the hospital helped her, I can’t help but wonder why the author didn’t include the name of the hospital at least in the “Helpful resources” part. I am sure this information would be helpful to any reader who is going through a similar journey. It’s referred simply as “the hospital”.
Maria here has an open question:
“I wonder if all the mothers struggling the same. I wonder if all the moms are going through so much. And if so, why isn’t anyone screaming about their experience?” (Maria Koval, Seasons)
My answer is Yes! Maria, you are not alone in this. You felt alone in your isolation caring for your babies. But you were never alone in this. None of mothers are. We all struggle to accommodate, to adjust, to adapt, to find ourselves in this constantly changing and challenging environment of motherhood.
Why are women silent? Society rules. For all the openness and acceptance, the society is still not ready to openly discuss all struggles the motherhood brings. Well, we do discuss it but only in hush-hush tones and only with other mothers. Never with pregnant. Never with young girls who say they want kids. The society romanticizes motherhood as a whole for them. I feel like this is the world’s largest secret that all mothers agreed to keep hushed and one has to become a mother to learn and be privy to this secret club.
And when a shell-shocked new mother reaches finally for help thinking that she is the problem because that’s not what a motherhood supposed to be like, not like it was portrayed in all those fancy articles… what does this club do in general? Pat her on a shoulder and tell in a condescending tone to hang on because we all have been there and it they actually had worse and it gets harder when they grow. Well, we all were there indeed. Some had easier, some harder. But… will this really help this new mother? Instead of patting and sharing your scary stories why not reaching out and help?
We need stories like this. We, women and girls, our society need honest voices like this. Yes, it contradicts the carefully curated image of being a mother. But is this curated image is 100% true? For many mothers out there it is not. The truth is not as beautiful. And it needs to be said to help new mothers to cope and adjust.
Thank you, Maria, for sharing your journey - struggles and all. And remember from me, mother of two special need kids with small age difference and NO help: not only I get it all and I will hold your hand while saying this: I promise you it DOES get better and easier. And you WILL find your new self. It is not going to be the same Maria, the one before kids. You will create a new version of yourself that you will love more. You will find it in you and around you. You will build it like a unique creation made from scattered Lego block. It’s all out there. You will find these blocks together with your kids and you will build it. One day at a time.
Just wait.
November 9, 2024
Seasons: Depression. Pregnancy. Motherhood.
by Maria Koval
Maria Koval’s latest offers a deep look into what a mother goes through when depression and anxiety are inflamed by hormones, uncertainty, occasional resentment, and the deep love for the children you can’t stop worrying about. Pregnancy is hard to begin with, but impossible when you’re suffering from big “D” depression.
SEASONS can be taken as the study of a woman fending off a hurricane of emotions during a first pregnancy of twins, you literally are told about all the terrible nuances of what not being in control of yourself does to your self-esteem when your brain is hijacked. Are the twins crying too much? Are they crying enough? Am I doing everything right, wrong, in-between? Am I a good mother?? This narrative is a solid block of every experience in this mom’s life as filtered through mental illness—you get EVERYTHING. And in time, you see how what’s going on in her always active brain wraps itself in the love of her twins and helps her forge ahead to a good result for who she wants to be as a mother, wife, and whole person. Lines like “These two little humans are thieves, they stole my heart” touch you as you see what love can do. For those of us who have kids, all that’s in here is familiar, but at a HIGHER volume. Baby’s “baby”. They do! You drive yourself crazy with worry over SIDS, when to teach your babies to self-sooth (this mom knows all the methods, studying them), and fights hard not to give in to her impulses to save her kids from the trauma of crying. And as mom realizes she needs help and a break; she can’t take one even when her husband is being super dad for the night and letting her enjoy just one hour of her favorite show—which she can barely do as she hears her thieves reaching out faintly with crying.
The protagonist has always suffered from depression, she doubted it was this at first, she can hide her self-diagnosis by reconciling mood swings with what others around her are going through as similar. She lives her life, falls in love, gets married, deals with her personal issues alone, and has a handle on the aspects of her life she can reason through with an amount of introspection few of us can muster, and she seeks help when she seems at her bleakest. This short work can be a valuable reflection of what many others are going through (hidden from view) and give you a shared perspective of how to cope with things that seem unreconcilable. There are good lessons here, and some laughs…live for the laughs and love. You can find your guide in this book.
by Maria Koval
Maria Koval’s latest offers a deep look into what a mother goes through when depression and anxiety are inflamed by hormones, uncertainty, occasional resentment, and the deep love for the children you can’t stop worrying about. Pregnancy is hard to begin with, but impossible when you’re suffering from big “D” depression.
SEASONS can be taken as the study of a woman fending off a hurricane of emotions during a first pregnancy of twins, you literally are told about all the terrible nuances of what not being in control of yourself does to your self-esteem when your brain is hijacked. Are the twins crying too much? Are they crying enough? Am I doing everything right, wrong, in-between? Am I a good mother?? This narrative is a solid block of every experience in this mom’s life as filtered through mental illness—you get EVERYTHING. And in time, you see how what’s going on in her always active brain wraps itself in the love of her twins and helps her forge ahead to a good result for who she wants to be as a mother, wife, and whole person. Lines like “These two little humans are thieves, they stole my heart” touch you as you see what love can do. For those of us who have kids, all that’s in here is familiar, but at a HIGHER volume. Baby’s “baby”. They do! You drive yourself crazy with worry over SIDS, when to teach your babies to self-sooth (this mom knows all the methods, studying them), and fights hard not to give in to her impulses to save her kids from the trauma of crying. And as mom realizes she needs help and a break; she can’t take one even when her husband is being super dad for the night and letting her enjoy just one hour of her favorite show—which she can barely do as she hears her thieves reaching out faintly with crying.
The protagonist has always suffered from depression, she doubted it was this at first, she can hide her self-diagnosis by reconciling mood swings with what others around her are going through as similar. She lives her life, falls in love, gets married, deals with her personal issues alone, and has a handle on the aspects of her life she can reason through with an amount of introspection few of us can muster, and she seeks help when she seems at her bleakest. This short work can be a valuable reflection of what many others are going through (hidden from view) and give you a shared perspective of how to cope with things that seem unreconcilable. There are good lessons here, and some laughs…live for the laughs and love. You can find your guide in this book.
March 18, 2025
Seasons is a rousing memoire of a mother’s struggle with depression before and after the birth of her twins. With a writing style intimately colloquial, the reality of pregnancy and motherhood are explored with truth, humor, and wit, making an easy but intensely personal read.
Receiving news of pregnancy is often painted as a portrait of pure happiness, but what occurs within the mind when shadows of debilitating doubt obscure full joy? These juxtaposing, complex views – expectant delight merged with the devastating burden of sadness – offers a realistic outlook through a transformative journey, and will be extremely relatable to women who have similarly experienced this magical blessing in their own lives.
Never shying away from the more personal aspects of pregnancy and postpartum challenges, Maria’s immense strength is made evident, her courage exposed word by word. From attending appointments, to contemplations of terror-filled visions, blissful moments of reprieve, to restless nights rearing two children, the undeniable strength arising from parenthood is endearingly powerful.
Women are extraordinarily brave. It’s crucial to understand that experiencing morosity after childbirth is neither a sign of weakness or failure. The fact that Maria birthed twins and published this moving book is a testament to her resilient spirit
As a male reader, this book wasn’t necessarily targeted for my demographic. However, valuable lessons can be gleamed from gravid sentiments, of the great importance of a partner’s empathy, support and care during this most transformative time in a woman’s life. In the end, ephemeral despondency and fear that ail the soul are swiftly dispelled by a child’s smile, by the great privilege of raising life.
Maria, I wish you nothing but love, joy, and success for you and your family. May happy years lie ahead! 😊
Receiving news of pregnancy is often painted as a portrait of pure happiness, but what occurs within the mind when shadows of debilitating doubt obscure full joy? These juxtaposing, complex views – expectant delight merged with the devastating burden of sadness – offers a realistic outlook through a transformative journey, and will be extremely relatable to women who have similarly experienced this magical blessing in their own lives.
Never shying away from the more personal aspects of pregnancy and postpartum challenges, Maria’s immense strength is made evident, her courage exposed word by word. From attending appointments, to contemplations of terror-filled visions, blissful moments of reprieve, to restless nights rearing two children, the undeniable strength arising from parenthood is endearingly powerful.
Women are extraordinarily brave. It’s crucial to understand that experiencing morosity after childbirth is neither a sign of weakness or failure. The fact that Maria birthed twins and published this moving book is a testament to her resilient spirit
As a male reader, this book wasn’t necessarily targeted for my demographic. However, valuable lessons can be gleamed from gravid sentiments, of the great importance of a partner’s empathy, support and care during this most transformative time in a woman’s life. In the end, ephemeral despondency and fear that ail the soul are swiftly dispelled by a child’s smile, by the great privilege of raising life.
Maria, I wish you nothing but love, joy, and success for you and your family. May happy years lie ahead! 😊
November 13, 2024
It is a heart-wrenchingly honest account of one woman's journey into motherhood. As I turned the pages, I felt like I was reading Maria's personal diary, filled with raw emotions and vulnerability.
The author's courage in sharing her struggles with depression, pregnancy, and motherhood is admirablez However, I noticed some grammatical errors throughout the book, which slightly detracted from the overall reading experience.
Despite this, Maria's story is deeply relatable. Her emotions, fears, and joys are palpable, making this book a must-read for expectant mothers, new mothers, and anyone seeking insight into the complexities of motherhood.
Maria's writing masterfully conveys the transformative power of motherhood, capturing the intense emotions that come with it.
Overall, "Seasons" is a powerful and emotional read that sheds light on the often-taboo topics of maternal mental health and the challenges of motherhood. Maria's bravery in sharing her story will undoubtedly inspire and reassure many women that they are not alone.
The author's courage in sharing her struggles with depression, pregnancy, and motherhood is admirablez However, I noticed some grammatical errors throughout the book, which slightly detracted from the overall reading experience.
Despite this, Maria's story is deeply relatable. Her emotions, fears, and joys are palpable, making this book a must-read for expectant mothers, new mothers, and anyone seeking insight into the complexities of motherhood.
Maria's writing masterfully conveys the transformative power of motherhood, capturing the intense emotions that come with it.
Overall, "Seasons" is a powerful and emotional read that sheds light on the often-taboo topics of maternal mental health and the challenges of motherhood. Maria's bravery in sharing her story will undoubtedly inspire and reassure many women that they are not alone.
May 11, 2025
Wow. Just wow. As a mother of four boys, ages ranging from 17 to 6, I fell in love with this book. So incredibly moving. I felt heard and seen while reading. There were so many battles of motherhood and depression that Maria so beautifully laid on these pages that put me right back in my moments of early motherhood. I feel like I found a peice of myself when I read this. I'm so incredibly moved and touched. I would recommend this book to all expecting mothers, new mothers, mothers who have lost who they are, those who are still trying to discover who they may be, and moms who just want to take a trip down memory lane about their own journeys through motherhood. This book simply and utterly beautiful.
June 8, 2025
This book is beyond relatable and I am so glad Maria Koval decided to share her story! As a woman who has suffered through many of the same struggles I am beyond appreciative of her bringing awareness to women's mental health. This book helps show that we do not have to suffer alone. While things in life may sometimes feel impossible and the weight feels like we can not move forward we have to keep trying do the best we can and ask for help when we need it. It is important to remember that no matter what we are enough, good enough, strong enough, enough just the way we are and any doubts that our brains may replay over and over again trying to say otherwise are all lies. When really in the depths of the struggle it is important to remember this too shall pass.
July 27, 2025
This book explores the pain and joy of being a new parent. As someone who also dealt with depression both before and after being pregnant, I was pleasantly surprised by how well the author portrayed the reality of it. Postpartum depression isn't something that everyone is comfortable speaking about and, more importantly, being honest about, and Koval did a fantastic job keeping it real. I felt the author's suffering when things were difficult, and any mother would be able to feel a sense of camaraderie with this struggling new mother. Definitely recommended to anyone who enjoys a raw, realistic memoir.
August 18, 2025
Maria is a new writer and I do not judge hard on books that are about authors lives. This book is about her struggles with postpartum depression after having twins. It’s the real truth about what it’s like to be pregnant and the struggles afterwards. I can 100% relate to all the feelings that she had.
It was very easy to read and understand. I also follow her on TikTok so I can like hear her reading it to me. She actually has two books out and I haven’t read her second book yet.
It was very easy to read and understand. I also follow her on TikTok so I can like hear her reading it to me. She actually has two books out and I haven’t read her second book yet.
December 11, 2024
I absolutely loved this book.
It is definitely a rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts, but it's message, the amazing writing and the hope it gives mixed with the sad feelings makes it so raw and so worth it.
I usually don't like memoirs but I loved this one. Sending my best wishes to Maria, her husband and their two beautiful children!❤️
It is definitely a rollercoaster of emotions and thoughts, but it's message, the amazing writing and the hope it gives mixed with the sad feelings makes it so raw and so worth it.
I usually don't like memoirs but I loved this one. Sending my best wishes to Maria, her husband and their two beautiful children!❤️
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews