I can actually see this being a real business. I'm sure the ethics are crazy complicated, and I have no idea how it would even be regulated (I'd like to think it would be, given all the crazy complicated ethics). So I was immediately drawn to the story, because I like a story that debates ethics.
That's what's happening in my mind on the outer edge of the book, but at its core is a very sad man who has spent his life trying to atone for something that he blames himself for, even though it wasn't his fault (it will never be his fault, no matter how much he blames himself - my therapist calls this cognitive distortion "personalization"). As a result, he spends his entire adult life trying to find closure in something he will never find closure from. He is such a sad, sad man.
In some ways, he reminds me of Tinker Grey from Amor Towle's Rules of Civility, and because the ending is open-ended, I can kind of imagine him the same way in that photo that Katey finds years later. I can even imagine Lily coming across that photo (of the narrator) in the same way someday, looking at his face and seeing someone she recognizes but doesn't recognize and then writing her story. In fact, I would love to know Lily's story from here onward (but only as an adult, because I don't really love child narrators).
I think the book could've gone more into his weird relationship with his mother. I'd have appreciated knowing why his mother felt the way she did about sex and then passed it down to her son. There's definitely a back story there that could also be explored. (Ha! I've just given Tang a prequel and a sequel 😂.)
I read through some of the lower rated reviews to try to understand why I might've liked this book so much more than they did. I get it. Lily is an innocent victim, an unintended consequence, whose life might have been screwed up by the fact that her "father" is the protagonist. And the protagonist is so, so, so sad and empty hearted, though he's trying and starting to learn he needs to fill that up a bit. But I think it's a bit unfair only to blame him. He is, after all, just making a living, and it was really Mari's decision to hire him. Plus, for him to take the drastic action he does toward the end, I think that shows growth and maturity. I hope he stays on that trajectory, and I hope he gets a lot of therapy. His mom really screwed him up!
The only minor detail I couldn't quite figure out was why he was always so broke. I know he said he was trying to save up for home ownership, which is stupid crazy expensive in NYC, but at $150 an hour working full-time and sometimes more than that would've put him at $315,000 a year...well, that's a lot more than I made at the peak of my career and I would still have been able to afford a NYC coop (NYC has coops and condos, and they are very different ownership structures - coops are affordable and condos are not really, but they are still valid forms of home ownership). Was he holding out for a condo? I don't think so....
Rounding up to 5