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Slow Burns & Tragic Beginnings #1
Only the Small Bones
Win a free print copy of this book!
2 days and 02:13:16
3 copies available
U.S. only
“What makes him so special?”
“He reminds me of someone I once knew…”
As the founder of Freedom Fighters, famed music composer, William Mayes, is often the first port of call when the FBI needs assistance with human trafficking victims.
After receiving such a call one night, William abandons everything to catch the next flight home. Arriving at Manhattan Memorial, he finds a beautiful young man restrained to a gurney. His eyes are wild with fear, and blood stains his skin. No one has been successful in getting him to speak.
When even he can’t get the young man to cooperate, William does something he may later come to regret—he extends an invite to his home.
The young man is non-verbal, angry, and at times openly hateful. All of which gives him control over William’s emotions.
William slowly begins to spiral from his own struggles with his tormented past. His nightmares return, sleep becomes a lost cause, and the dark voices in his head are out for blood.
Amid their co-dependent isolation, William’s feelings evolve. Lines are blurred, and then crossed altogether as they start down a path riddled with secrets and lies of omission.
The only thing that can set them both free is the truth. But maybe some things are better left buried. Because if the ugliest parts of William are ever unearthed, no one will be spared.
***Only the Small Bones is an MM romance, and book 1 in the standalone series Slow Burns & Tragic Beginnings. This story features an interracial romance, a non-verbal MC, and mental health representation. Cameos from cast members of the Infidelity series is also included. A full list of content warnings is provided on my website.
“He reminds me of someone I once knew…”
As the founder of Freedom Fighters, famed music composer, William Mayes, is often the first port of call when the FBI needs assistance with human trafficking victims.
After receiving such a call one night, William abandons everything to catch the next flight home. Arriving at Manhattan Memorial, he finds a beautiful young man restrained to a gurney. His eyes are wild with fear, and blood stains his skin. No one has been successful in getting him to speak.
When even he can’t get the young man to cooperate, William does something he may later come to regret—he extends an invite to his home.
The young man is non-verbal, angry, and at times openly hateful. All of which gives him control over William’s emotions.
William slowly begins to spiral from his own struggles with his tormented past. His nightmares return, sleep becomes a lost cause, and the dark voices in his head are out for blood.
Amid their co-dependent isolation, William’s feelings evolve. Lines are blurred, and then crossed altogether as they start down a path riddled with secrets and lies of omission.
The only thing that can set them both free is the truth. But maybe some things are better left buried. Because if the ugliest parts of William are ever unearthed, no one will be spared.
***Only the Small Bones is an MM romance, and book 1 in the standalone series Slow Burns & Tragic Beginnings. This story features an interracial romance, a non-verbal MC, and mental health representation. Cameos from cast members of the Infidelity series is also included. A full list of content warnings is provided on my website.
367 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 3, 2024
343 people are currently reading
5580 people want to read
About the author
C.P. Harris
10 books1,262 followersC.P. Harris writes emotionally charged romance with a dark edge, where love is messy, possessive, and always worth the wreckage. Best known for The Good Liar and her latest release, Saving Sparrow, she crafts stories that dive deep into flawed characters and hard-won, happily-ever-afters. When not writing, she's devouring the same intense, complicated romances she loves to create. If you crave angst, obsession, and endings that hurt before they heal—C.P. Harris might just be your next favorite author.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 456 reviews
August 16, 2025
My initial rating of this book started at 2.5-3 stars, but has steadily dropped to 1 star as I’ve had time to reflect. As someone who usually loves C.P. Harris’ work, I was excited about this book, but it left me deeply uncomfortable—and that's coming from somebody who is well versed in dark romance and human trafficking stories that are often far more graphic than this one.
The premise itself is fucked: William, a self-proclaimed "empath" and movie composer, takes home Ryan, a non-verbal trafficking survivor, straight from the hospital. Ryan, traumatised and touch-averse, is kept isolated in William’s apartment for weeks without access to professional therapy or external support. This complete lack of safeguarding raises major red flags, and is totally unrealistic.
What’s worse is William’s behaviour during this time. While Ryan struggles with severe trauma, William indulges in sexual fantasies about him, masturbates to thoughts of him, further victimises him, and actively prevents him from recovering any autonomy— e.g. by throwing out Ryan’s favourite foods. The story tries to frame William as a well-meaning, tortured hero, but his actions come across as selfish, manipulative, and borderline predatory. Having the narrative told almost entirely through William’s perspective makes it worse, as it prioritises his inner conflict and desires over Ryan’s recovery.
Then there’s the third-act twist, which takes the story from bad to worse. Without giving too much away, this revelation casts William’s actions in an even more sinister, premeditated light, at least in my opinion. Instead of addressing this appropriately, the book doubles down on their relationship, culminating in a rushed and entirely unrealistic sex scene in the final chapters. Despite Ryan’s extensive history of sexual abuse, his physical and emotional trauma is brushed aside in favour of spice, completely forgetting his touch aversion, and it feels as though the plot is wrapped up without much thought.
The depiction of Ryan’s mutism is equally problematic. As someone with personal connections to situational mutism, I was looking forward to meaningful representation, but this fell flat. Ryan, who hasn’t spoken in almost 20 years, suddenly starts speaking fluently in full sentences within days, which is entirely unrealistic. Trauma recovery—especially involving mutism from a young age—is far more complex, and this oversimplified portrayal does a disservice to those who live with it. You cannot cure vocal cords and psychological trauma overnight by finding the ‘right man’, and to suggest you can is absurd. A more gradual approach, with small steps toward recovery shown over time, would have added much-needed depth and authenticity. Note: If you want a more accurate portrayal of mutism, I'd suggest To Catch a Firefly by Emmy Sanders.
This mishandling of sensitive topics is made worse by what seems to be a lack of research or sensitivity readers. When writing about human trafficking, emotional trauma, and non-verbal communication, authors should approach these subjects with care and accuracy, especially when the story is being marketed as a heartfelt romance. This book doesn’t, and the absence of thoughtful representation undermines its entire premise.
Ultimately, this story feels exploitative rather than emotional. Trauma and recovery are treated as plot devices to propel a toxic romance that the book insists on framing as redemptive. While some readers might suspend disbelief enough to enjoy it, I couldn’t. It left me with an icky feeling that’s hard to shake, and I can’t recommend it to anyone looking for meaningful representation or a heartfelt, tender romance.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
The premise itself is fucked: William, a self-proclaimed "empath" and movie composer, takes home Ryan, a non-verbal trafficking survivor, straight from the hospital. Ryan, traumatised and touch-averse, is kept isolated in William’s apartment for weeks without access to professional therapy or external support. This complete lack of safeguarding raises major red flags, and is totally unrealistic.
What’s worse is William’s behaviour during this time. While Ryan struggles with severe trauma, William indulges in sexual fantasies about him, masturbates to thoughts of him, further victimises him, and actively prevents him from recovering any autonomy— e.g. by throwing out Ryan’s favourite foods. The story tries to frame William as a well-meaning, tortured hero, but his actions come across as selfish, manipulative, and borderline predatory. Having the narrative told almost entirely through William’s perspective makes it worse, as it prioritises his inner conflict and desires over Ryan’s recovery.
Then there’s the third-act twist, which takes the story from bad to worse. Without giving too much away, this revelation casts William’s actions in an even more sinister, premeditated light, at least in my opinion. Instead of addressing this appropriately, the book doubles down on their relationship, culminating in a rushed and entirely unrealistic sex scene in the final chapters. Despite Ryan’s extensive history of sexual abuse, his physical and emotional trauma is brushed aside in favour of spice, completely forgetting his touch aversion, and it feels as though the plot is wrapped up without much thought.
The depiction of Ryan’s mutism is equally problematic. As someone with personal connections to situational mutism, I was looking forward to meaningful representation, but this fell flat. Ryan, who hasn’t spoken in almost 20 years, suddenly starts speaking fluently in full sentences within days, which is entirely unrealistic. Trauma recovery—especially involving mutism from a young age—is far more complex, and this oversimplified portrayal does a disservice to those who live with it. You cannot cure vocal cords and psychological trauma overnight by finding the ‘right man’, and to suggest you can is absurd. A more gradual approach, with small steps toward recovery shown over time, would have added much-needed depth and authenticity. Note: If you want a more accurate portrayal of mutism, I'd suggest To Catch a Firefly by Emmy Sanders.
This mishandling of sensitive topics is made worse by what seems to be a lack of research or sensitivity readers. When writing about human trafficking, emotional trauma, and non-verbal communication, authors should approach these subjects with care and accuracy, especially when the story is being marketed as a heartfelt romance. This book doesn’t, and the absence of thoughtful representation undermines its entire premise.
Ultimately, this story feels exploitative rather than emotional. Trauma and recovery are treated as plot devices to propel a toxic romance that the book insists on framing as redemptive. While some readers might suspend disbelief enough to enjoy it, I couldn’t. It left me with an icky feeling that’s hard to shake, and I can’t recommend it to anyone looking for meaningful representation or a heartfelt, tender romance.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
December 3, 2024
Let me start by saying that I've read and enjoyed this author's books previously, and one is even an all-time fave! I've been looking forward to reading this since it was announced! I have no triggers, and all of the tropes sounded right up my alley. This author is always tackling controversial things in her books such as cheating, dubcon/CNC, age gaps with a power imbalance, etc., and I've eaten it all up. So I absolutely walked into this with eyes wide open. As someone who works in a field to identify and report human trafficking and has done hours of research, victim advocacy, and training on the topic, I was fully prepared to have to suspend my disbelief a bit just like with other books of a similar nature that I've read and enjoyed. Unfortunately, suspension of disbelief became impossible, as the portrayal of human trafficking (what it is, who the victims are, and what victims go through) was grossly misunderstood and romanticized.
Spoilers ahead.
There are so many things I had issues with right from the start. William never should have been allowed to be alone in a hospital room with Ryan immediately after he was rescued. It should have been a female social worker or victim advocate. On top of this, Ryan is nonverbal and suffering a major traumatic episode in the hospital and cannot communicate (or probably even identify) his own wants or needs in the moment. And even if he could, it is NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, okay to bring a victim home with you before they receive any kind of medical treatment. I don't care what nonprofit you run, this is dangerous for the victim, and the fact that William thinks HE can fix Ryan is selfish and disgusting.
Then, once William has brought Ryan home, he proceeds to force his own feelings on Ryan over and over by overlooking Ryan's needs completely in favor of his own desires. Calling Ryan beautiful and jerking off while fantasizing about him when he's supposed to be taking care of Ryan is vile.
"Ryan did everything with so much passion. From the way he wrote, as though the blank page offended him, to the way he ate. Even down to the way he sometimes seemed to hate me. His scowls contained enough heat to singe the hairs off my body from across the room. That passion gave him a sensual quality I was positive he wasn’t aware of. The more fire he displayed, the more fascinating he became. I was beginning to find myself captivated by him, and he hadn’t even spoken a word to me yet."
THIS IS NOT OKAY TO THINK ABOUT A VICTIM WHO IS IN YOUR CARE.
William repeatedly makes assumptions about Ryan's intentions and puts responsibility for his own happiness onto Ryan, then turns around and accuses Ryan of withholding from him:
"I didn’t dare smile, or show my amusement in any way for fear he’d do something to shut down my blip of happiness. Like maybe burn my library to the ground. In many ways he didn’t trust me, and when it came to my rare declarations of joy, I didn’t trust him either. Joy was such a fragile thing, and he’d already proven he had the power to rob me of it at will."
"I wanted to beg for a nod, a shake of his head, a mouthed “yes.” Something. I wanted whatever he’d given my mother in the kitchen that for some odd reason felt like he was purposely withholding from me."
When Ryan agrees to something William wants him to do, William grabs his face and kisses him without consent, knowing full well that Ryan is touch averse and nonverbal. And he continues to read into every one of Ryan's actions as some sort of sexual taunt:
"Ryan had a pattern of teasing his affection, keeping me on edge and wanting more. An addict receiving his dose in tiny increments. Just enough to keep me functioning, but never enough to leave me satisfied. I harbored a constant craving for more, the unfulfilled need made this intoxicated version of me want to snatch him up by the hair and punish him for what he did to me. For what he didn’t do to me. Even now, he taunted me without knowing it, unintentionally dangling himself from a string while I fought to enjoy it instead of reaching for him."
I'm curious how this is any different from a rapist telling a woman she was "asking for it"?
All of this culminated into straight up sexual assault of a human trafficking victim. Ryan might have initiated the kiss before this horrific encounter, but he had to get drunk to do it and quickly became overwhelmed and tried to express non-consent without words multiple times in multiple ways (retreating to a dark corner, pushing William away, trying to move past him, and turning his face away when William tried to kiss him) and he was ignored at every turn, all while being told things like, "this is what you wanted" and "it's too late for that." William eventually does back off, and then proceeds to jerk off in front of Ryan claiming he's going to teach Ryan that sex can be enjoyable. But it's not up to William to decide when and how Ryan should be ready for sex. Sex trafficking survivors are not the same as domestic violence or sexual assault victims. They know nothing but brutal, violent rape, and many of them never recover enough emotionally or physically to ever be able to have sex again. For William to say he's going to teach Ryan how to enjoy sex like it's just that easy is dismissive and tone deaf (as is his misguided assumption that Ryan must have been a victim of labor trafficking in order for William to clear his own conscience when all signs of Ryan's behavior pointed to sex trafficking). Sexual trauma of this magnitude can't be "solved" by meeting the perfect person, as the end of the book implies. It's also horrifying that even a sexual encounter with someone who's supposed to care for Ryan looks so much like the brutal treatment he's suffered since childhood at the hands of men who treated him like an object.
The "plot twist" was clear from the start, and actually made all of William's selfish actions throughout the book even worse. William experienced something horrific himself, and certainly had his own demons because of it, but finding out that William left Ryan behind was the final nail in the coffin for William's character for me. Ryan's POV chapter could have had the potential to redeem the story for me just a bit, but instead it was about how William's magical dick healed him from a lifetime of rape:
"He ran his hand up and down my thigh, and the hands of the men who’d taken me with no right to, fell away. Their bruises faded with them. William kissed his way to my neck, and the hands that had brutally wrapped around it disappeared. The marks often left behind went too. And when he whispered how beautiful I was, how proud of me he was, the voices that said I was nothing, only worth what I was used for, went quiet. My head and heart were clear for the first time in my life. I never knew freedom could feel like this."
This book romanticized a topic that deserves more respect than it was given under the guise of an "emotional story." It's exploitative of people who have already been exploited in the most terrifying way imaginable in order to invoke an emotional response from the reader, and I do not recommend this book. I would say to check the content warnings, but there is no warning of sexual assault between MCs. It's not dubcon. It's not CNC. Ryan deserved better.
Also the lack of any kind of resources such as the national human trafficking hotline ANYWHERE in this book is not a good look. Is the goal the educate or exploit?
If you're looking for a more sensitive handling of the topic of human trafficking, I recommend The One That Got Away by Nicky James.
If you're looking for a more sensitive depiction of trauma and recovery and living as a survivor of kidnapping and rape, I recommend The Difference Between by Leta Blake.
Spoilers ahead.
There are so many things I had issues with right from the start. William never should have been allowed to be alone in a hospital room with Ryan immediately after he was rescued. It should have been a female social worker or victim advocate. On top of this, Ryan is nonverbal and suffering a major traumatic episode in the hospital and cannot communicate (or probably even identify) his own wants or needs in the moment. And even if he could, it is NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, okay to bring a victim home with you before they receive any kind of medical treatment. I don't care what nonprofit you run, this is dangerous for the victim, and the fact that William thinks HE can fix Ryan is selfish and disgusting.
Then, once William has brought Ryan home, he proceeds to force his own feelings on Ryan over and over by overlooking Ryan's needs completely in favor of his own desires. Calling Ryan beautiful and jerking off while fantasizing about him when he's supposed to be taking care of Ryan is vile.
"Ryan did everything with so much passion. From the way he wrote, as though the blank page offended him, to the way he ate. Even down to the way he sometimes seemed to hate me. His scowls contained enough heat to singe the hairs off my body from across the room. That passion gave him a sensual quality I was positive he wasn’t aware of. The more fire he displayed, the more fascinating he became. I was beginning to find myself captivated by him, and he hadn’t even spoken a word to me yet."
THIS IS NOT OKAY TO THINK ABOUT A VICTIM WHO IS IN YOUR CARE.
William repeatedly makes assumptions about Ryan's intentions and puts responsibility for his own happiness onto Ryan, then turns around and accuses Ryan of withholding from him:
"I didn’t dare smile, or show my amusement in any way for fear he’d do something to shut down my blip of happiness. Like maybe burn my library to the ground. In many ways he didn’t trust me, and when it came to my rare declarations of joy, I didn’t trust him either. Joy was such a fragile thing, and he’d already proven he had the power to rob me of it at will."
"I wanted to beg for a nod, a shake of his head, a mouthed “yes.” Something. I wanted whatever he’d given my mother in the kitchen that for some odd reason felt like he was purposely withholding from me."
When Ryan agrees to something William wants him to do, William grabs his face and kisses him without consent, knowing full well that Ryan is touch averse and nonverbal. And he continues to read into every one of Ryan's actions as some sort of sexual taunt:
"Ryan had a pattern of teasing his affection, keeping me on edge and wanting more. An addict receiving his dose in tiny increments. Just enough to keep me functioning, but never enough to leave me satisfied. I harbored a constant craving for more, the unfulfilled need made this intoxicated version of me want to snatch him up by the hair and punish him for what he did to me. For what he didn’t do to me. Even now, he taunted me without knowing it, unintentionally dangling himself from a string while I fought to enjoy it instead of reaching for him."
I'm curious how this is any different from a rapist telling a woman she was "asking for it"?
All of this culminated into straight up sexual assault of a human trafficking victim. Ryan might have initiated the kiss before this horrific encounter, but he had to get drunk to do it and quickly became overwhelmed and tried to express non-consent without words multiple times in multiple ways (retreating to a dark corner, pushing William away, trying to move past him, and turning his face away when William tried to kiss him) and he was ignored at every turn, all while being told things like, "this is what you wanted" and "it's too late for that." William eventually does back off, and then proceeds to jerk off in front of Ryan claiming he's going to teach Ryan that sex can be enjoyable. But it's not up to William to decide when and how Ryan should be ready for sex. Sex trafficking survivors are not the same as domestic violence or sexual assault victims. They know nothing but brutal, violent rape, and many of them never recover enough emotionally or physically to ever be able to have sex again. For William to say he's going to teach Ryan how to enjoy sex like it's just that easy is dismissive and tone deaf (as is his misguided assumption that Ryan must have been a victim of labor trafficking in order for William to clear his own conscience when all signs of Ryan's behavior pointed to sex trafficking). Sexual trauma of this magnitude can't be "solved" by meeting the perfect person, as the end of the book implies. It's also horrifying that even a sexual encounter with someone who's supposed to care for Ryan looks so much like the brutal treatment he's suffered since childhood at the hands of men who treated him like an object.
The "plot twist" was clear from the start, and actually made all of William's selfish actions throughout the book even worse. William experienced something horrific himself, and certainly had his own demons because of it, but finding out that William left Ryan behind was the final nail in the coffin for William's character for me. Ryan's POV chapter could have had the potential to redeem the story for me just a bit, but instead it was about how William's magical dick healed him from a lifetime of rape:
"He ran his hand up and down my thigh, and the hands of the men who’d taken me with no right to, fell away. Their bruises faded with them. William kissed his way to my neck, and the hands that had brutally wrapped around it disappeared. The marks often left behind went too. And when he whispered how beautiful I was, how proud of me he was, the voices that said I was nothing, only worth what I was used for, went quiet. My head and heart were clear for the first time in my life. I never knew freedom could feel like this."
This book romanticized a topic that deserves more respect than it was given under the guise of an "emotional story." It's exploitative of people who have already been exploited in the most terrifying way imaginable in order to invoke an emotional response from the reader, and I do not recommend this book. I would say to check the content warnings, but there is no warning of sexual assault between MCs. It's not dubcon. It's not CNC. Ryan deserved better.
Also the lack of any kind of resources such as the national human trafficking hotline ANYWHERE in this book is not a good look. Is the goal the educate or exploit?
If you're looking for a more sensitive handling of the topic of human trafficking, I recommend The One That Got Away by Nicky James.
If you're looking for a more sensitive depiction of trauma and recovery and living as a survivor of kidnapping and rape, I recommend The Difference Between by Leta Blake.
December 2, 2024
Only the Small Bones is a wonderfully dynamic emotional romance that made me catch all the feelings. The heartwrenching personal backstories of both main characters and their depressing and poignant emotional traumas create a strong connection between William and Ryan.
From the first chapter, I knew this was a special story. Its very intense beginning draws both characters together so dramatically, making for a strong impression and beginning to their story.
This author has written another incredible emotional story that I could not get enough of. These two characters go on quite an intense and thought-provoking journey that brings about many strong emotional moments that tug at your heart. I loved seeing their relationship develop and found it overall incredibly moving.
*** I reviewed a complimentary copy of this story.***
From the first chapter, I knew this was a special story. Its very intense beginning draws both characters together so dramatically, making for a strong impression and beginning to their story.
This author has written another incredible emotional story that I could not get enough of. These two characters go on quite an intense and thought-provoking journey that brings about many strong emotional moments that tug at your heart. I loved seeing their relationship develop and found it overall incredibly moving.
*** I reviewed a complimentary copy of this story.***
December 4, 2024
I went into this book without knowing absolutely anything about it. From the first chapter, I decided to take it with a grain of salt.
We have William who runs a nonprofit for trafficking victims and he’s called in when one of them (Ryan) isn’t engaging with anyone. He decides to be a hero and offer his home (something that he has done before with others) for Ryan to be able to acclimate. William is portrayed as a man with a dark secret, who’s trying to do good for his own penance.
Ryan doesn’t talk. The book is told from William’s POV and William just reads Ryan’s expressions to gauge his moods and what he’s trying to say. Ryan is skittish and doesn’t want to be touched. He keeps to himself and barely communicates with William. I feel like if we had Ryan’s POV, the book could have been salvaged.
Some people hated this book. Some people loved it. I am Switzerland. I simply didn’t care enough about any of it. The story was just so unbelievable from the start. William’s behaviour didn’t particularly bother me because I feel like people can’t help who they’re attracted to. He also never instigated anything and never pushed Ryan. I’m not saying the whole thing is okay but William’s human.
I strongly believe that William should have pushed Ryan more to go to therapy. It’s what should have happened BUT William is also a deeply traumatised man who’s been making all of his decisions with one person in mind. Of course he won’t be making all the right choices in this situation.
While I can see where the problematic parts for some might be, I didn’t care enough for it to bother me so I was vibing along.
BIG SPOILERS AHEAD!
I figured out that Ryan is Asher pretty quickly. William’s thoughts being “can he see the guilt in my eyes” “does he know” “can he feel my pain” (these aren’t quotes, just along the lines of😌) and his big dark secret made me realise that they knew each other somehow. When he uttered “Asher” the first time, I realised that Ryan and Asher are one and the same. The big dark secret being that William and Asher were both together in captivity as kids. William escapes, Asher doesn’t.
It all obviously made more sense then. Why William was selfish and why their interactions were the way they were. Why William moved Asher into his home straight away and why he was attracted to him etc. Yes, it made sense…that didn’t really make it okay.
I have no idea how to rate this. I understand which things were problematic for some. I understand what people might have loved. I have read way more problematic things so none of it really bothered me. What I can’t understand is who thought the whole premise of this book was okay?
I feel like the story had so much potential. The way it was written was just not good enough. It needed more of a backstory on William’s trauma. It needed the proper research and the right execution. We needed to be given a reason as to why they spend 80% of the book acting like strangers? If they weren’t ready to admit the truth, they shouldn’t have been living together. Every single aspect of it was absolutely unbelievable. Where does one draw the line with fiction?
It could have been so beautiful, if only it was executed correctly. William had so much potential as a character but he was just flat. The ending felt rushed too…sad because I love C. P. Harris
We have William who runs a nonprofit for trafficking victims and he’s called in when one of them (Ryan) isn’t engaging with anyone. He decides to be a hero and offer his home (something that he has done before with others) for Ryan to be able to acclimate. William is portrayed as a man with a dark secret, who’s trying to do good for his own penance.
Ryan doesn’t talk. The book is told from William’s POV and William just reads Ryan’s expressions to gauge his moods and what he’s trying to say. Ryan is skittish and doesn’t want to be touched. He keeps to himself and barely communicates with William. I feel like if we had Ryan’s POV, the book could have been salvaged.
Some people hated this book. Some people loved it. I am Switzerland. I simply didn’t care enough about any of it. The story was just so unbelievable from the start. William’s behaviour didn’t particularly bother me because I feel like people can’t help who they’re attracted to. He also never instigated anything and never pushed Ryan. I’m not saying the whole thing is okay but William’s human.
I strongly believe that William should have pushed Ryan more to go to therapy. It’s what should have happened BUT William is also a deeply traumatised man who’s been making all of his decisions with one person in mind. Of course he won’t be making all the right choices in this situation.
While I can see where the problematic parts for some might be, I didn’t care enough for it to bother me so I was vibing along.
BIG SPOILERS AHEAD!
I figured out that Ryan is Asher pretty quickly. William’s thoughts being “can he see the guilt in my eyes” “does he know” “can he feel my pain” (these aren’t quotes, just along the lines of😌) and his big dark secret made me realise that they knew each other somehow. When he uttered “Asher” the first time, I realised that Ryan and Asher are one and the same. The big dark secret being that William and Asher were both together in captivity as kids. William escapes, Asher doesn’t.
It all obviously made more sense then. Why William was selfish and why their interactions were the way they were. Why William moved Asher into his home straight away and why he was attracted to him etc. Yes, it made sense…that didn’t really make it okay.
I have no idea how to rate this. I understand which things were problematic for some. I understand what people might have loved. I have read way more problematic things so none of it really bothered me. What I can’t understand is who thought the whole premise of this book was okay?
I feel like the story had so much potential. The way it was written was just not good enough. It needed more of a backstory on William’s trauma. It needed the proper research and the right execution. We needed to be given a reason as to why they spend 80% of the book acting like strangers? If they weren’t ready to admit the truth, they shouldn’t have been living together. Every single aspect of it was absolutely unbelievable. Where does one draw the line with fiction?
It could have been so beautiful, if only it was executed correctly. William had so much potential as a character but he was just flat. The ending felt rushed too…sad because I love C. P. Harris
November 22, 2024
♾️⭐️
🌶️🌶️
To write a full review how I normally would for a book of this caliber would completely give away the entire story. So instead of my usual rundown, I’m going to focus solely on how this book made me FEEL. And I have a LOT of feelings. So here we go. 🩷
If you’ve read anything by C.P. Harris, have seen any of my previous reviews, or if you’re new here and just saw my story updates, you’ll know that she has a wonderfully painful way of making the unbelievable, believable. Things that are so wrong, suddenly turn so right. And HARD things, become so simple. She has a beautiful way of breaking you, pushing your boundaries, and putting you back together again by the very end. This is what OTSB did to me.. AGAIN.
This might not be the typical MM read that you’re used to. This book covers VERY sensitive topics that shouldn’t be taken lightly. If you’re not HURTING alongside these characters, then you must be made of stone. C.P has a beautiful way of explaining, helping you understand, and explaining these feelings and emotions in a wonderful way. A raw, true, real way. And I felt every single one of them.
Every word in this book was written with purpose. Every line told a story of its own. Every sentence was carefully crafted to perfection to tell the story of William, and ultimately Ryan. Please understand that these men are BROKEN. There is no world that they exist in where they’re blissfully unaware of what they and others have gone through. They live it every day. And every day is hard.
I cried, I was excited, I felt every single emotion that they felt. I was scared at times. I was worried. And at one point I didn’t think I’d ever get the HEA that I was so desperately needing. But again, what a wonderful one it was.
Please check all TWs and tropes before diving in. This book is not light. It is not fluffy. But I am not the same person I was before reading. It’s truly beautiful. Heartbreaking, yes. But beautiful.
The spice? Well that’s not the point of William & Ryan’s story. There was absolutely no way the two of them could have ended up being any spicier than they were. They needed the time, the space, and the pain to happen for them to ultimately end up falling in bed together. Which they do, and in true C.P fashion, it was delicious and perfect. There were some mild spicy scenes earlier in the book that were fun to quench the need, but like I said absolutely necessary to give them the time they needed.
One thing I will say vehemently is that if you’re uncomfortable, push past it. Read further. Continue on their journey with them. Because what you think you might know? You absolutely have no idea. Everything I thought was going to happen was NOT what happened. In the best of ways.
It’s been a long time since I’ve felt this wrecked over a book, and I think it’s really what I needed. Right time, right book, right place. If this isn’t for you? That’s okay too. It’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. But it sure was mine. ♾️🩷
🌶️🌶️
To write a full review how I normally would for a book of this caliber would completely give away the entire story. So instead of my usual rundown, I’m going to focus solely on how this book made me FEEL. And I have a LOT of feelings. So here we go. 🩷
If you’ve read anything by C.P. Harris, have seen any of my previous reviews, or if you’re new here and just saw my story updates, you’ll know that she has a wonderfully painful way of making the unbelievable, believable. Things that are so wrong, suddenly turn so right. And HARD things, become so simple. She has a beautiful way of breaking you, pushing your boundaries, and putting you back together again by the very end. This is what OTSB did to me.. AGAIN.
This might not be the typical MM read that you’re used to. This book covers VERY sensitive topics that shouldn’t be taken lightly. If you’re not HURTING alongside these characters, then you must be made of stone. C.P has a beautiful way of explaining, helping you understand, and explaining these feelings and emotions in a wonderful way. A raw, true, real way. And I felt every single one of them.
Every word in this book was written with purpose. Every line told a story of its own. Every sentence was carefully crafted to perfection to tell the story of William, and ultimately Ryan. Please understand that these men are BROKEN. There is no world that they exist in where they’re blissfully unaware of what they and others have gone through. They live it every day. And every day is hard.
I cried, I was excited, I felt every single emotion that they felt. I was scared at times. I was worried. And at one point I didn’t think I’d ever get the HEA that I was so desperately needing. But again, what a wonderful one it was.
Please check all TWs and tropes before diving in. This book is not light. It is not fluffy. But I am not the same person I was before reading. It’s truly beautiful. Heartbreaking, yes. But beautiful.
The spice? Well that’s not the point of William & Ryan’s story. There was absolutely no way the two of them could have ended up being any spicier than they were. They needed the time, the space, and the pain to happen for them to ultimately end up falling in bed together. Which they do, and in true C.P fashion, it was delicious and perfect. There were some mild spicy scenes earlier in the book that were fun to quench the need, but like I said absolutely necessary to give them the time they needed.
One thing I will say vehemently is that if you’re uncomfortable, push past it. Read further. Continue on their journey with them. Because what you think you might know? You absolutely have no idea. Everything I thought was going to happen was NOT what happened. In the best of ways.
It’s been a long time since I’ve felt this wrecked over a book, and I think it’s really what I needed. Right time, right book, right place. If this isn’t for you? That’s okay too. It’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. But it sure was mine. ♾️🩷
December 17, 2024
I needed some time to think about this one and to digest what I'd just read, so my review has taken about a week. And it's still a bit rambling so my apologies!
Ok, I declare up front - I am a big CP Harris fan.
Harris is a consummate writer. I just knew when I started reading that I could place my trust in her hands and would be guaranteed a great story.
This is a beautiful book, so well crafted with brilliant pacing.
Harris created palpable atmosphere and mood using descriptions of the weather; rain, snow and sunlight. And the push-pull of their dynamic using a sense of space in William's apartment, which felt at times claustrophobic for the MCs but then allowed safe space for the MCs to run, hide or reject the other.
Use of different forms of communication (as one of the MCs has selective mutism) through body language, facial expressions, written word (handwritten notes and use of books), and music, PLUS only relying on one MCs POV made me feel off kilter and really ramped up the tension and mystery.
I can't quite put my finger on it but this book had a real nostalgic (perhaps through the referencing of children's books) and melancholy feel.
The characters of William and Ryan are typical CP Harris men; broken, flawed, intense, and yearning intimacy but often getting in their own way due to some obstacle that must be overcome. Themes of growth, healing, and redemption feature here, as they do in all CP books, as do uncomfortable power and psychosexual dynamics, balanced out with moments of such sweetness between the MCs!
The dynamic between William and Ryan was so compelling I just couldn't put this book down and there was a part about two thirds of the way through where I just knew I had to keep going and finish, despite it being past midnight!
The unfolding of this story was perfection. It was so, so heartbreaking. I remember there was a point in the story where I physically had to put my hand on my heart to deal with what was going on...but then there are moments of happiness here too with a courageously won HEA.
5 stars for this one! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Ok, I declare up front - I am a big CP Harris fan.
Harris is a consummate writer. I just knew when I started reading that I could place my trust in her hands and would be guaranteed a great story.
This is a beautiful book, so well crafted with brilliant pacing.
Harris created palpable atmosphere and mood using descriptions of the weather; rain, snow and sunlight. And the push-pull of their dynamic using a sense of space in William's apartment, which felt at times claustrophobic for the MCs but then allowed safe space for the MCs to run, hide or reject the other.
Use of different forms of communication (as one of the MCs has selective mutism) through body language, facial expressions, written word (handwritten notes and use of books), and music, PLUS only relying on one MCs POV made me feel off kilter and really ramped up the tension and mystery.
I can't quite put my finger on it but this book had a real nostalgic (perhaps through the referencing of children's books) and melancholy feel.
The characters of William and Ryan are typical CP Harris men; broken, flawed, intense, and yearning intimacy but often getting in their own way due to some obstacle that must be overcome. Themes of growth, healing, and redemption feature here, as they do in all CP books, as do uncomfortable power and psychosexual dynamics, balanced out with moments of such sweetness between the MCs!
The dynamic between William and Ryan was so compelling I just couldn't put this book down and there was a part about two thirds of the way through where I just knew I had to keep going and finish, despite it being past midnight!
The unfolding of this story was perfection. It was so, so heartbreaking. I remember there was a point in the story where I physically had to put my hand on my heart to deal with what was going on...but then there are moments of happiness here too with a courageously won HEA.
5 stars for this one! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
July 10, 2025
Книга дуже болюча🥹💔
Я навіть не думала що настільки
Раян він дуже зламаний, моментами коли вже все було добре я думала а може якраз йому стане краще але наоборот ставало ще гірше🥲 мені так було боляче за нього
Вільям він старався допомогти йому, він справді був дуже терплячим до нього
Він справді єдиний хто допоміг йому
Єдине що мені в ній не сподобалось це як пише авторка🤷🏿♀️ моментами мене навіть це бісило
Просто йде розповідь про щось і зразу наступне речення взагалі щось протилежне наприклад «Раяну було дуже важко. Я пішов спати.» 🤦🏿♀️ я просто нічого не розуміла в такі моменти і йшла перечитувати
Так то книга мені сподобалась, в кінці як все розкрилось я була дуже здивована, такий розвиток подій що я в шоці🥲
Але книга дуже болюча, дуже важка це треба взяти до уваги
Я навіть не думала що настільки
Раян він дуже зламаний, моментами коли вже все було добре я думала а може якраз йому стане краще але наоборот ставало ще гірше🥲 мені так було боляче за нього
Вільям він старався допомогти йому, він справді був дуже терплячим до нього
Він справді єдиний хто допоміг йому
Єдине що мені в ній не сподобалось це як пише авторка🤷🏿♀️ моментами мене навіть це бісило
Просто йде розповідь про щось і зразу наступне речення взагалі щось протилежне наприклад «Раяну було дуже важко. Я пішов спати.» 🤦🏿♀️ я просто нічого не розуміла в такі моменти і йшла перечитувати
Так то книга мені сподобалась, в кінці як все розкрилось я була дуже здивована, такий розвиток подій що я в шоці🥲
Але книга дуже болюча, дуже важка це треба взяти до уваги
February 20, 2025
I’ve never been so uncomfortable reading a book in my life…..who willing takes home a Sex Trafficking victim into their home and have deep sexual fantasies about them? Like aren’t they a victim???? So uncomfortable but I trudged on and was even more uncomfortable when resident selfish prick “William” says “do I just need to take what I want” like bro wrong person to try the cnc play with, again he’s a literal victim…..but I still trudged on…we get to the third act plot twist and I hated “William” or “Malcolm” even more. So I dnfed at chapter 30..
Books are subjective and life’s to short to read anything that makes you uncomfortable. If you like this book kudos! If you are like me and was uncomfortable by most parts also kudos to you.
Love this author but this was a miss!
“That’s the place where promises were broken,” I whispered. “The place where innocence was lost.” The smallest of the bones lay atop a wooden miniature coffin engraved with a name, a date, and my plea to Gargantuan. Bring him back.
The reference for the tattoo was cool
Books are subjective and life’s to short to read anything that makes you uncomfortable. If you like this book kudos! If you are like me and was uncomfortable by most parts also kudos to you.
Love this author but this was a miss!
“That’s the place where promises were broken,” I whispered. “The place where innocence was lost.” The smallest of the bones lay atop a wooden miniature coffin engraved with a name, a date, and my plea to Gargantuan. Bring him back.
The reference for the tattoo was cool
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 21, 2024
This one broke me, then put me back together. It was so good, I already know that Ryan and William will live rent free in my head forever. I seriously couldn’t put down, I had to know the ending. I will definitely be rereading this soon.
December 7, 2024
Read in another great buddy read with the always lovely Lilly ❤️
This was wonderful and I absolutely loved it.
For those who might be seeing negative reviews, I thought I'd clear up some potential misunderstandings:
✨ William and Ryan have more going on than meets the eye. You have to read to find out, but it all comes together and makes a lot of more sense looking back. And this a primarily a romance and romance is going to happen. Even to a sex trafficking victim. To be surprised that attraction and later sexual things happen between these two is...well, it sure is something.
✨ Ryan is an adult. He's 26 years old. He can make his own choices, even as a traumatized victim. Is it 100% realistic that William, the creator of his non-profit foundation meant to help victims of trafficking get back on their feet, has taken past adult victims to his personal home and does so here with Ryan? Maybe not.
But who cares? It's fiction and it's romance. These two have to be near each other somehow in order to fall in love. And again, Ryan is an adult. He is not a minor. William mentions in his thoughts in the beginning that all minors his organization picks up go with government agencies anyway.
Also, William does NOT make Ryan go to his place. He mentions it as a choice and that is what Ryan chooses.
✨ Yes, William is attracted to Ryan and has sexual thoughts about him, he masturbates thinking about him (although he starts out trying to think of his business partner/sometimes sex buddy and he eventually thinks of Ryan instead) and the like. But he never acts on this and never does it in front of Ryan (on purpose ahem). He respects Ryan's boundaries even when it's hard for him to do so and tries his best to give Ryan space when he needs it.
✨ Yes, Ryan rarely leaves William's place at first. But he isolates himself, not the other way around. William encourages Ryan to go running with him to get out of the house. He specifically makes it clear that his place is NOT a prison, and gives him codes to the alarm and such that he doesn't give anyone else. Yes, eventually William has some selfish thoughts and desires. But it's his actions that matter. He lets Ryan go when Ryan wants to go and listens to Ryan's wishes, however reluctant he may feel about it all.
✨ Ryan is an adult. He is allowed to be desired by William. He has his own autonomy. I thought the whole point of him becoming free was to have that? What's so wrong about Ryan then being desired when he is free to consent? Why can't William desire him? It's not like William acts on any of those desires without Ryan's consent.
They also take their time to lead up to a lot of things. For awhile they just sleep next to each other, then barely kiss, barely touch...this builds up to a lot of things, sexually. If it took as much as it perhaps should realistically take, this book would be so very long. Like unrealistic or not, who cares? It's a romance, first and foremost.
✨ Ah yes, the dining room scene. No, it is NOT sexual assault by William. We can get past that right away. Ryan is trying to do something, trying to make it so that William IS forcing him, as that's all he's ever known. That's all he knows how to deal with. He hasn't been introduced to actual pleasure and he doesn't know sex in a positive light yet. Not really.
Passion is allowed to exist between them too. For William to get caught up in the moment. Infantilizing a grown adult, even one who has been through horrible stuff, even rape, is...well it's ridiculous. Ryan has his own autonomy now.
And just so you all know, when he wants William to stop, he stops! William actually tries to leave several times, but then Ryan will not let him do so. He does some push and pull and William asks him what he wants. When he finally realizes what Ryan is trying to do, he stops completely! He then only touches himself to show Ryan what pleasure with sex looks like.
There is no sexual assault in this scene, despite Ryan in a weird way wanting there to be. Or wanting to go with all he's known. The exact opposite of sexual assault happens, actually.
✨ Ryan's own trauma is not pushed to the wayside at the end for the sake of steam at the end. They have been building up to it for awhile at this point. And sorry, no matter the subject matter, this is a romance, where sex is involved. It's going to happen. It's allowed to be steamy and passionate and loving, which that scene is. Like it takes the whole book to build up to this because of what Ryan's been through, so how exactly has his trauma been "pushed aside"? Silly.
✨ It must be mentions that this is a C.P. Harris book. If you're familiar with her work and writing style, why is any of this surprising to you? This book, overall, is actually one of her healthiest books. But yeah there's some unhealthy elements to it and so what? They start to become a bit co-dependent, but then Ryan himself chooses to go to Safe Haven to get help.
This was glossed over by some in their reviews. It isn't just Ryan relying on William to "fix him" or anything. He takes some time to make the decision, but he eventually does. And he goes without contact with William for about a month or so. He gets professional help, not just relying on William only.
There's literally a scene with a character talking to William to try to warn him of the potential pitfalls if he continues trying to be Ryan's all, his one and only.
✨ I saw one thing that made me laugh in another review. William does not take away any of Ryan's autonomy. He throws away some chicken tenders and fries because of . Also, Ryan wasn't eating them! For a reason! William didn't just take away food from Ryan lol. That's laughable. He's the one trying to get Ryan to eat regularly. Like thinking he tried to take away his autonomy with shit like that is ridiculous.
---
So with some misunderstandings cleared up, hopefully that will help others make an informed decision going into this.
Yes, this deals with trafficking and heavy subjects such as torture and rape. Yes, William and Ryan aren't the healthiest a couple could ever be. But does anyone expect that? With what these two go through, I think not. They're two broken men who have to learn how to start really living their life, apart and together.
They're so great together. Even when Ryan isn't talking, they speak in so many other ways too. Just by Ryan's facial expressions and the like.
And finding out the full story was a surprise. No, I did not see it coming and was totally shocked and surprised. And then when we really get into the truth, the story of things, it was heartbreaking.
To see these two come out the other side from where they were was amazing. And they weren't fixed or anything, but they got better. They were always getting better, and I loved that message. They couldn't be fixed, no one can. But day by day, they can get better and learn to really live. And their love was amazing, their chemistry was amazing. I absolutely loved these two togehther.
I highly recommend this, and don't let the negative reviews fool you. And also just...be aware that this is C.P. Harris and I don't think any of her books will ever portray 100% healthy relationships all the way through. In the end they come out the other side healthy, but not at first.
Just...know what you're getting into and don't be surprised when you get what you came for.
And just...enjoy William and Ryan together.
Because it's .
Can't wait for the next book in this series and I can't wait to see who it is about.
Onto the next! 😘
This was wonderful and I absolutely loved it.
For those who might be seeing negative reviews, I thought I'd clear up some potential misunderstandings:
✨ William and Ryan have more going on than meets the eye. You have to read to find out, but it all comes together and makes a lot of more sense looking back. And this a primarily a romance and romance is going to happen. Even to a sex trafficking victim. To be surprised that attraction and later sexual things happen between these two is...well, it sure is something.
✨ Ryan is an adult. He's 26 years old. He can make his own choices, even as a traumatized victim. Is it 100% realistic that William, the creator of his non-profit foundation meant to help victims of trafficking get back on their feet, has taken past adult victims to his personal home and does so here with Ryan? Maybe not.
But who cares? It's fiction and it's romance. These two have to be near each other somehow in order to fall in love. And again, Ryan is an adult. He is not a minor. William mentions in his thoughts in the beginning that all minors his organization picks up go with government agencies anyway.
Also, William does NOT make Ryan go to his place. He mentions it as a choice and that is what Ryan chooses.
✨ Yes, William is attracted to Ryan and has sexual thoughts about him, he masturbates thinking about him (although he starts out trying to think of his business partner/sometimes sex buddy and he eventually thinks of Ryan instead) and the like. But he never acts on this and never does it in front of Ryan (on purpose ahem). He respects Ryan's boundaries even when it's hard for him to do so and tries his best to give Ryan space when he needs it.
✨ Yes, Ryan rarely leaves William's place at first. But he isolates himself, not the other way around. William encourages Ryan to go running with him to get out of the house. He specifically makes it clear that his place is NOT a prison, and gives him codes to the alarm and such that he doesn't give anyone else. Yes, eventually William has some selfish thoughts and desires. But it's his actions that matter. He lets Ryan go when Ryan wants to go and listens to Ryan's wishes, however reluctant he may feel about it all.
✨ Ryan is an adult. He is allowed to be desired by William. He has his own autonomy. I thought the whole point of him becoming free was to have that? What's so wrong about Ryan then being desired when he is free to consent? Why can't William desire him? It's not like William acts on any of those desires without Ryan's consent.
They also take their time to lead up to a lot of things. For awhile they just sleep next to each other, then barely kiss, barely touch...this builds up to a lot of things, sexually. If it took as much as it perhaps should realistically take, this book would be so very long. Like unrealistic or not, who cares? It's a romance, first and foremost.
✨ Ah yes, the dining room scene. No, it is NOT sexual assault by William. We can get past that right away. Ryan is trying to do something, trying to make it so that William IS forcing him, as that's all he's ever known. That's all he knows how to deal with. He hasn't been introduced to actual pleasure and he doesn't know sex in a positive light yet. Not really.
Passion is allowed to exist between them too. For William to get caught up in the moment. Infantilizing a grown adult, even one who has been through horrible stuff, even rape, is...well it's ridiculous. Ryan has his own autonomy now.
And just so you all know, when he wants William to stop, he stops! William actually tries to leave several times, but then Ryan will not let him do so. He does some push and pull and William asks him what he wants. When he finally realizes what Ryan is trying to do, he stops completely! He then only touches himself to show Ryan what pleasure with sex looks like.
There is no sexual assault in this scene, despite Ryan in a weird way wanting there to be. Or wanting to go with all he's known. The exact opposite of sexual assault happens, actually.
✨ Ryan's own trauma is not pushed to the wayside at the end for the sake of steam at the end. They have been building up to it for awhile at this point. And sorry, no matter the subject matter, this is a romance, where sex is involved. It's going to happen. It's allowed to be steamy and passionate and loving, which that scene is. Like it takes the whole book to build up to this because of what Ryan's been through, so how exactly has his trauma been "pushed aside"? Silly.
✨ It must be mentions that this is a C.P. Harris book. If you're familiar with her work and writing style, why is any of this surprising to you? This book, overall, is actually one of her healthiest books. But yeah there's some unhealthy elements to it and so what? They start to become a bit co-dependent, but then Ryan himself chooses to go to Safe Haven to get help.
This was glossed over by some in their reviews. It isn't just Ryan relying on William to "fix him" or anything. He takes some time to make the decision, but he eventually does. And he goes without contact with William for about a month or so. He gets professional help, not just relying on William only.
There's literally a scene with a character talking to William to try to warn him of the potential pitfalls if he continues trying to be Ryan's all, his one and only.
✨ I saw one thing that made me laugh in another review. William does not take away any of Ryan's autonomy. He throws away some chicken tenders and fries because of . Also, Ryan wasn't eating them! For a reason! William didn't just take away food from Ryan lol. That's laughable. He's the one trying to get Ryan to eat regularly. Like thinking he tried to take away his autonomy with shit like that is ridiculous.
---
So with some misunderstandings cleared up, hopefully that will help others make an informed decision going into this.
Yes, this deals with trafficking and heavy subjects such as torture and rape. Yes, William and Ryan aren't the healthiest a couple could ever be. But does anyone expect that? With what these two go through, I think not. They're two broken men who have to learn how to start really living their life, apart and together.
They're so great together. Even when Ryan isn't talking, they speak in so many other ways too. Just by Ryan's facial expressions and the like.
And finding out the full story was a surprise. No, I did not see it coming and was totally shocked and surprised. And then when we really get into the truth, the story of things, it was heartbreaking.
To see these two come out the other side from where they were was amazing. And they weren't fixed or anything, but they got better. They were always getting better, and I loved that message. They couldn't be fixed, no one can. But day by day, they can get better and learn to really live. And their love was amazing, their chemistry was amazing. I absolutely loved these two togehther.
I highly recommend this, and don't let the negative reviews fool you. And also just...be aware that this is C.P. Harris and I don't think any of her books will ever portray 100% healthy relationships all the way through. In the end they come out the other side healthy, but not at first.
Just...know what you're getting into and don't be surprised when you get what you came for.
And just...enjoy William and Ryan together.
Because it's .
Can't wait for the next book in this series and I can't wait to see who it is about.
Onto the next! 😘
December 20, 2024
William + Ryan
Broken boys | Slow burn | Severe trauma
This book was beautiful. It was full of trauma and heartache. But also of healing and overcoming and not letting the trauma or those who caused it win.
"They didn't win. They didn't win."
"I'm okay, we're okay."
⚠️possible spoilers below in detailed tropes and trigger warnings
Tropes:
Slowwww burn
Broken boys
Overcoming trauma and healing
Child trafficking survivor
Hurt/comfort
Interracial couple
Touch averse MC
Non verbal MC
Mental health rep
Lovemaking
Plot twist
TWs:
Severe trauma
Child trafficking
Kidnapping
Flash backs
Nightmares
Broken boys | Slow burn | Severe trauma
This book was beautiful. It was full of trauma and heartache. But also of healing and overcoming and not letting the trauma or those who caused it win.
"They didn't win. They didn't win."
"I'm okay, we're okay."
⚠️possible spoilers below in detailed tropes and trigger warnings
Tropes:
Slowwww burn
Broken boys
Overcoming trauma and healing
Child trafficking survivor
Hurt/comfort
Interracial couple
Touch averse MC
Non verbal MC
Mental health rep
Lovemaking
Plot twist
TWs:
Severe trauma
Child trafficking
Kidnapping
Flash backs
Nightmares
December 1, 2024
"I couldn't look at him. Couldn't take how my feelings were changing and deepening when he could never be mine, when making him mine shouldn't be the goal."
I have a rule that I give 5 stars to any book that makes me cry. I did that. A lot in this book. I even had to take more than one break from it because the subject matter was that hard. That heartbreaking. At one point I strongly considered having to DNF. I am a parent. I have young children. Reading about what happened to an innocent child after their abduction into human trafficking and the aftermath hit me in a way I don't know if it truly could to someone who isn't a parent.
C.P. Harris was right when she warned us this was a departure of her usual style. When she said slow burn, she meant it. There is very little actual steam in this book and it was completely understandable and fitting of the story being told. That does not mean there aren't intimate moments between William and Ryan. As Ryan is non-verbal, the bulk of his communication is done through body language and facial expressions. A lot can be said with just a look.
"None of that compared to having Ryan - my beautiful, broken counterpart - in my bed, not laying a hand on me, yet touching me in ways no one ever had."
Healing is a big theme throughout the story. Both William and Ryan have pasts that haunt their present. They've both been trapped, albeit in different ways. I liked that there was a focus on therapy and not the use of a relationship being some major fix. Even with their pasts, I think this is probably the "healthiest" relationship that this author has ever written. It took work to get to that point, but both William and Ryan put in that work. In the end I'm glad I was able to finish this book because these two deserved all the good things, even if it destroyed my heart to make it there.
I have a rule that I give 5 stars to any book that makes me cry. I did that. A lot in this book. I even had to take more than one break from it because the subject matter was that hard. That heartbreaking. At one point I strongly considered having to DNF. I am a parent. I have young children. Reading about what happened to an innocent child after their abduction into human trafficking and the aftermath hit me in a way I don't know if it truly could to someone who isn't a parent.
C.P. Harris was right when she warned us this was a departure of her usual style. When she said slow burn, she meant it. There is very little actual steam in this book and it was completely understandable and fitting of the story being told. That does not mean there aren't intimate moments between William and Ryan. As Ryan is non-verbal, the bulk of his communication is done through body language and facial expressions. A lot can be said with just a look.
"None of that compared to having Ryan - my beautiful, broken counterpart - in my bed, not laying a hand on me, yet touching me in ways no one ever had."
Healing is a big theme throughout the story. Both William and Ryan have pasts that haunt their present. They've both been trapped, albeit in different ways. I liked that there was a focus on therapy and not the use of a relationship being some major fix. Even with their pasts, I think this is probably the "healthiest" relationship that this author has ever written. It took work to get to that point, but both William and Ryan put in that work. In the end I'm glad I was able to finish this book because these two deserved all the good things, even if it destroyed my heart to make it there.
February 14, 2025
This is hands down one of the most heartbreaking books I've ever read. It is such a powerful and gorgeous book. This is a book about trauma, guilt, mental illness, anger, and love. You are going to experience every emotion there is to experience. William and Ryan are flawed characters and that's why I love them so fiercely. I will protect these two AT ALL COSTS! As you read this book you need to just ride the waves with the characters. You think you know what's going on but I promise you don't. William & Ryan's story is not an easy one. It's raw, gritty, and REAL. Aren't those the best kinds of love stories after all?
December 19, 2024
This review is late because I struggled to process a lot of my thoughts and emotions while I was reading this book. A week after I’d finished it I was still trying to work out what I felt about it.
This is my first C.P Harris book and it certainly made an impression. My thoughts and feelings warred with this one - it wasn’t just a clear-cut liked it or didn’t because the content was so grey and it took such an emotional toll on me. However, I have decided, upon reflection, that I really didn’t like the way this story handled trauma.
I really liked that the book was character driven, not plot driven, and I really love the authors writing style. I also adored Ryan as a character. But that’s where my positive feelings for it ended.
I understand that one of the main characters had terrible survivors remorse that made his life feel like a waking nightmare, and the other was a victim of human trafficking and horrific abuse, and of course the story was always going to be heavy. I get that. I also understand that other readers might resonate with the characters and content in a way I didn’t. Perhaps I wasn’t the intended audience for this book. Perhaps, having not been in that exact situation before, I just couldn’t quite wrap my head around where the characters were coming from.
In saying that, you could tell right from the get-go that absolutely no research into the rescue and rehabilitation of human trafficking survivors had been done at all. I would have thought such heavy, sensitive topics would be treated with more care, but they weren’t handled well at all.
When the main character is literally using a victim of human trafficking to make himself feel better about his past, (even if you do find out he’s trying to make specific reparations for specific damage he thinks he's done) you’ve got to wonder whether it’s trauma romanticism or simply trauma porn.
The way William isolates Ryan in his home upset me deeply and the offhanded things that are said to Ryan while the poor man is trying to recover absolutely broke my heart.
For example, lines like this one really threw me: “Everyone’s got to work for their food…” I was a little speechless after this line. Why would you have a nurturing character (who’s a therapist, I might add) say that to a human trafficking victim who has clearly been starved and probably forced to work for their food - if they were even given any at all?
The lack of sensitivity on the authors part doesn’t sit right with me. At all.
And then there are beautiful quotes like this that are so at odds with the rest of the content: “You’ve always been a crusader. A champion for the underdog, even when you were the underdog yourself. It both inspires me and terrifies me, because you’ll fight harder for others than you will for yourself—and at the detriment of yourself.”
I saw glimpses of this character - or who and what the author thought I’d see in this character, but it was overshadowed by his uncomfortable and borderline predatory behaviour. Especially once you find out he knew who Ryan was the whole time.
William running a human trafficking rescue and rehabilitation foundation to assuage his own guilt was… interesting. On one hand I can see why someone would want to right their perceived wrongs of their past. But on the other hand, every time William inner monologued about how having Ryan stay with him was his penance and way to make reparations for the past, I felt icky. After finishing the book in understood why, but that didn’t change how I felt.
Williams choices really upset me. He preaches consent and then disregards it whenever he feels like it. Considering he’s also a survivor and the head of a trafficking survivor foundation, you’d think he’d be a lot more mindful.
The kiss scene in chapter 17 particularly upset me. Ryan made it clear he wanted William to stop, but William continued and then made it all about his “need”. It made me super uncomfortable - and not in a “this is a hard topic to read about” way, more like in a “this is consent violation” kinda way. He screams and yells at Ryan when he pulls back from being touched, and then a few minutes later launches into a holier than thou monologue about how Ryan’s consent is all that matters and “if you’re never ready that’s ok”. The messages are so mixed and it brought up a lot of triggering memories for me.
I pushed through and continued reading though, and when I got to about 70% (I think it was around 500 pages into the ebook) the story shifted as the plot twist came into effect. From here on I enjoyed the book a bit more because I understood where each of the characters were coming from, however the plot twist and the next few scenes post-flashback made Williams behaviour towards Ryan seem even more obscure and predatory to me. Knowing what I knew about them both now, I was baffled by some of the things he’d done since bringing Ryan back to his home from the hospital. What didn’t confuse me now though was Williams refusal to leave Ryan alone (prior to Safe Haven) - he was keeping his promise.
The last quarter of the book was supposed to be emotional and heartfelt, but it actually just felt like an excuse to slip in as many sex scenes as possible before the ending. And the way Ryan’s mutism was just forgotten about when he suddenly needed to start speaking in entire sentences really annoyed me. Honestly, there were just so many scenes that were off for me.
Perhaps not having read the authors backlist meant I wasn’t familiar with their handling and writing of trauma and maybe that spoilt my reading experience. But I just didn’t come away from reading this book feeling positive.
This is my first C.P Harris book and it certainly made an impression. My thoughts and feelings warred with this one - it wasn’t just a clear-cut liked it or didn’t because the content was so grey and it took such an emotional toll on me. However, I have decided, upon reflection, that I really didn’t like the way this story handled trauma.
I really liked that the book was character driven, not plot driven, and I really love the authors writing style. I also adored Ryan as a character. But that’s where my positive feelings for it ended.
I understand that one of the main characters had terrible survivors remorse that made his life feel like a waking nightmare, and the other was a victim of human trafficking and horrific abuse, and of course the story was always going to be heavy. I get that. I also understand that other readers might resonate with the characters and content in a way I didn’t. Perhaps I wasn’t the intended audience for this book. Perhaps, having not been in that exact situation before, I just couldn’t quite wrap my head around where the characters were coming from.
In saying that, you could tell right from the get-go that absolutely no research into the rescue and rehabilitation of human trafficking survivors had been done at all. I would have thought such heavy, sensitive topics would be treated with more care, but they weren’t handled well at all.
When the main character is literally using a victim of human trafficking to make himself feel better about his past, (even if you do find out he’s trying to make specific reparations for specific damage he thinks he's done) you’ve got to wonder whether it’s trauma romanticism or simply trauma porn.
The way William isolates Ryan in his home upset me deeply and the offhanded things that are said to Ryan while the poor man is trying to recover absolutely broke my heart.
For example, lines like this one really threw me: “Everyone’s got to work for their food…” I was a little speechless after this line. Why would you have a nurturing character (who’s a therapist, I might add) say that to a human trafficking victim who has clearly been starved and probably forced to work for their food - if they were even given any at all?
The lack of sensitivity on the authors part doesn’t sit right with me. At all.
And then there are beautiful quotes like this that are so at odds with the rest of the content: “You’ve always been a crusader. A champion for the underdog, even when you were the underdog yourself. It both inspires me and terrifies me, because you’ll fight harder for others than you will for yourself—and at the detriment of yourself.”
I saw glimpses of this character - or who and what the author thought I’d see in this character, but it was overshadowed by his uncomfortable and borderline predatory behaviour. Especially once you find out he knew who Ryan was the whole time.
William running a human trafficking rescue and rehabilitation foundation to assuage his own guilt was… interesting. On one hand I can see why someone would want to right their perceived wrongs of their past. But on the other hand, every time William inner monologued about how having Ryan stay with him was his penance and way to make reparations for the past, I felt icky. After finishing the book in understood why, but that didn’t change how I felt.
Williams choices really upset me. He preaches consent and then disregards it whenever he feels like it. Considering he’s also a survivor and the head of a trafficking survivor foundation, you’d think he’d be a lot more mindful.
The kiss scene in chapter 17 particularly upset me. Ryan made it clear he wanted William to stop, but William continued and then made it all about his “need”. It made me super uncomfortable - and not in a “this is a hard topic to read about” way, more like in a “this is consent violation” kinda way. He screams and yells at Ryan when he pulls back from being touched, and then a few minutes later launches into a holier than thou monologue about how Ryan’s consent is all that matters and “if you’re never ready that’s ok”. The messages are so mixed and it brought up a lot of triggering memories for me.
I pushed through and continued reading though, and when I got to about 70% (I think it was around 500 pages into the ebook) the story shifted as the plot twist came into effect. From here on I enjoyed the book a bit more because I understood where each of the characters were coming from, however the plot twist and the next few scenes post-flashback made Williams behaviour towards Ryan seem even more obscure and predatory to me. Knowing what I knew about them both now, I was baffled by some of the things he’d done since bringing Ryan back to his home from the hospital. What didn’t confuse me now though was Williams refusal to leave Ryan alone (prior to Safe Haven) - he was keeping his promise.
The last quarter of the book was supposed to be emotional and heartfelt, but it actually just felt like an excuse to slip in as many sex scenes as possible before the ending. And the way Ryan’s mutism was just forgotten about when he suddenly needed to start speaking in entire sentences really annoyed me. Honestly, there were just so many scenes that were off for me.
Perhaps not having read the authors backlist meant I wasn’t familiar with their handling and writing of trauma and maybe that spoilt my reading experience. But I just didn’t come away from reading this book feeling positive.
Read
February 8, 2026I can't anymore. 😮💨😮💨 dnf @ 53%.
No rating
No rating
December 17, 2024
1 ⭐️ I had very high hopes for this book, and unfortenatly, it was not a book for me.
One of my biggest issues with the book is the way it was promoted, everything from the cover, to it seeming to be a spicy mm romance (as this auther is known to not shy away from), and I went into it thinking it would be just that - It is not, and should not be promoted as a hurt/comfort, trauma-bonding, whatever type of romance you want to call it - it is not a romance! Therefore, I thought it was very strange that I only got creep vibes from William, a seemlingly put together person at first, but we soon realise that he is haunted by his own demons. When he desiceds to take Ryan, a human traffic victim, home to his own apartement rather them having him at the hospital - OR - to the housing for victims that his own charity owns(??Why no one did anything about this was beyond me, but I guess??) When they get to his apartement, it's clear how truly traumatized Ryan is - he doesn't speak, and shy away from all form of contact. Even the slightest touch makes him panic - a man that truly needs professional help - But even so, William is lusting after him, and there are descriptions of sexual fantiasies between himself and the other man. I alos felt bad for all the people around William, and how he treated them, like this character had no redeeming qualities, so I had a very hard time liking him in any way.. He even threw out Ryans favorite food (IYKYK). There is also a scene pretty far into the book that is just so insanly wrong in every way I can think of. Using your own lust and trauma to justify the actions that happens in that scene is just beyond me - nothing could save William after that - and nothing did either, cus we get to know some deep secrets not long after that, and William is just doomed. That character had no redemtion, and never will.
The ending was also very abrupt, and I'm no expert in trauma, but I think that the choices Ryan took at the end (his recovery what ever that was????) almost felt disrespectful to anyone who might have been in any similary situation. It just felt very wrong.
I think that if this book had went in a different direction than what it did, lets say a book about friendship or brotherhood, I think it could have been great! But to make this a romance, and not have the finesse and delicate touch for certain topics this book despreatly needed, it just fell apart.
One of my biggest issues with the book is the way it was promoted, everything from the cover, to it seeming to be a spicy mm romance (as this auther is known to not shy away from), and I went into it thinking it would be just that - It is not, and should not be promoted as a hurt/comfort, trauma-bonding, whatever type of romance you want to call it - it is not a romance! Therefore, I thought it was very strange that I only got creep vibes from William, a seemlingly put together person at first, but we soon realise that he is haunted by his own demons. When he desiceds to take Ryan, a human traffic victim, home to his own apartement rather them having him at the hospital - OR - to the housing for victims that his own charity owns(??Why no one did anything about this was beyond me, but I guess??) When they get to his apartement, it's clear how truly traumatized Ryan is - he doesn't speak, and shy away from all form of contact. Even the slightest touch makes him panic - a man that truly needs professional help - But even so, William is lusting after him, and there are descriptions of sexual fantiasies between himself and the other man. I alos felt bad for all the people around William, and how he treated them, like this character had no redeeming qualities, so I had a very hard time liking him in any way.. He even threw out Ryans favorite food (IYKYK). There is also a scene pretty far into the book that is just so insanly wrong in every way I can think of. Using your own lust and trauma to justify the actions that happens in that scene is just beyond me - nothing could save William after that - and nothing did either, cus we get to know some deep secrets not long after that, and William is just doomed. That character had no redemtion, and never will.
The ending was also very abrupt, and I'm no expert in trauma, but I think that the choices Ryan took at the end (his recovery what ever that was????) almost felt disrespectful to anyone who might have been in any similary situation. It just felt very wrong.
I think that if this book had went in a different direction than what it did, lets say a book about friendship or brotherhood, I think it could have been great! But to make this a romance, and not have the finesse and delicate touch for certain topics this book despreatly needed, it just fell apart.
February 19, 2025
5 Stars!⭐️
2🌶️
Wow!……….. Just WOW! Only The Small Bones Was PHENOMENAL YALL! This Is Definitely My Favorite Book By Cp Harris So Far And This Is 100% One Of My Favorite Books This Year. Ryan And William, WOW! Now Talk About Very Fleshed Out Characters. They Are A Type Of Couple Y’all That I Believe They Will Be Together Forever And Always. I Absolutely Love Them And Was Rooting For Them SO Hard. They Were Just So Amazing And I Loved This Book And I Will Be Thinking About This Book For Such A Long Time Now. I Also Loved The Side Characters Also. And I Really Hope Xavier Gets A Book Because There Is So Much More To Him And I Would Love To Know More About Him. HIGHLY Recommend This Book Y’all Cause This Book Was ABSOLUTELY PHENOMENAL! And Do It On Audiobook Cause Sean Crisden Just Made This Book And I Loved It.🫶💕
2🌶️
Wow!……….. Just WOW! Only The Small Bones Was PHENOMENAL YALL! This Is Definitely My Favorite Book By Cp Harris So Far And This Is 100% One Of My Favorite Books This Year. Ryan And William, WOW! Now Talk About Very Fleshed Out Characters. They Are A Type Of Couple Y’all That I Believe They Will Be Together Forever And Always. I Absolutely Love Them And Was Rooting For Them SO Hard. They Were Just So Amazing And I Loved This Book And I Will Be Thinking About This Book For Such A Long Time Now. I Also Loved The Side Characters Also. And I Really Hope Xavier Gets A Book Because There Is So Much More To Him And I Would Love To Know More About Him. HIGHLY Recommend This Book Y’all Cause This Book Was ABSOLUTELY PHENOMENAL! And Do It On Audiobook Cause Sean Crisden Just Made This Book And I Loved It.🫶💕
December 10, 2024
1.5? ⭐
this book was....rough.
while reading this book, i already knew it was going to be controversial. i honestly kept debating dnf-ing it, but with all the five star reviews that i had been seeing, thought it really couldn't be THAT BAD, right? And there was this plot twist that made the book better. well, it was THAT BAD. and the plot twist made it WORSE.
i had read the first book in the infidelity series so i knew going in that c.p. wrote some controversial stuff, but the blurb and TW list really did nothing to prepare me for what I was getting myself into with only the small bones. i'm someone that prides themselves on not really being bothered by triggers and usually skipping right over a TW list so i can enjoy the story without any spoilers. but looking at the list having finished it, it was just not enough. and i honestly think there needs to be an additional warning put on this book before you even read it.
i've read my fair share of books that fall into this category, especially highlighting SA, traff*cking, and all that other stuff, but this book really took it to a new level, and not in a good way. i was SO uncomfortable. i wanted to like William, I really did. With the way that he always went to aid of people through his organization, but immediately when he decided to take Ryan home, I was uncomfortable, and it only went up from there. I don't know if i'm expressing this in the best way, but William honestly seemed to be sexualizing Ryan from the get-go, DESPITE knowing what he did about his background. and the fact that William basically locked Ryan away in his home and refused to let anyone see him? talk about one cage to another!
And the plot twist. LAWD THE PLOT TWIST. IT MADE IT EVEN WORSE! i'm not giving out spoilers or anything, but yeah.....she really went there and did that! my gosh! and like immediately what happened afterwards, there's NO WAY that it is realistic in the slightest. Like okay, well, this plot twist came to light, now we can fall in love and be happy! yay! bye! like NO! also, (again no spoilers), there's no way that a person that can heal from certain things that quickly and just be able to do some things again...
i also think only having william's POV for a majority of the book was not helpful, especially since we didn't have that internal monologue from Ryan to better grasp how he is feeling emotionally, we just have it from the pov of william, which again, sexualized, and kinda ridiculous tbh. i feel like we're supposed to see him as this hero that comes and saves all these victims, but he clearly didn't if 1) his friends are concerned with him taking in another person after something that had happened previously and 2) he is sexualizing these people! like from the SECOND that he lays eyes on them!! i can't but think if it is some stockholm syndrome coupled with past trauma that ultimately brought these two together (iykyk), but while there was an HEA, I firmly do not believe Ryan's was with William.
at the end of the day, i didn't love this story, but clearly a lot of people did. and i love that for them...but....this book completely missed the mark, made me vastly uncomfortable, and i will...probably not be picking up another book by this author. it was rough. i'm not even going to list the tropes because, well, i don't even know how to describe them.
thank you to the author agency and c.p. for my gifted copy.
this book was....rough.
while reading this book, i already knew it was going to be controversial. i honestly kept debating dnf-ing it, but with all the five star reviews that i had been seeing, thought it really couldn't be THAT BAD, right? And there was this plot twist that made the book better. well, it was THAT BAD. and the plot twist made it WORSE.
i had read the first book in the infidelity series so i knew going in that c.p. wrote some controversial stuff, but the blurb and TW list really did nothing to prepare me for what I was getting myself into with only the small bones. i'm someone that prides themselves on not really being bothered by triggers and usually skipping right over a TW list so i can enjoy the story without any spoilers. but looking at the list having finished it, it was just not enough. and i honestly think there needs to be an additional warning put on this book before you even read it.
i've read my fair share of books that fall into this category, especially highlighting SA, traff*cking, and all that other stuff, but this book really took it to a new level, and not in a good way. i was SO uncomfortable. i wanted to like William, I really did. With the way that he always went to aid of people through his organization, but immediately when he decided to take Ryan home, I was uncomfortable, and it only went up from there. I don't know if i'm expressing this in the best way, but William honestly seemed to be sexualizing Ryan from the get-go, DESPITE knowing what he did about his background. and the fact that William basically locked Ryan away in his home and refused to let anyone see him? talk about one cage to another!
And the plot twist. LAWD THE PLOT TWIST. IT MADE IT EVEN WORSE! i'm not giving out spoilers or anything, but yeah.....she really went there and did that! my gosh! and like immediately what happened afterwards, there's NO WAY that it is realistic in the slightest. Like okay, well, this plot twist came to light, now we can fall in love and be happy! yay! bye! like NO! also, (again no spoilers), there's no way that a person that can heal from certain things that quickly and just be able to do some things again...
i also think only having william's POV for a majority of the book was not helpful, especially since we didn't have that internal monologue from Ryan to better grasp how he is feeling emotionally, we just have it from the pov of william, which again, sexualized, and kinda ridiculous tbh. i feel like we're supposed to see him as this hero that comes and saves all these victims, but he clearly didn't if 1) his friends are concerned with him taking in another person after something that had happened previously and 2) he is sexualizing these people! like from the SECOND that he lays eyes on them!! i can't but think if it is some stockholm syndrome coupled with past trauma that ultimately brought these two together (iykyk), but while there was an HEA, I firmly do not believe Ryan's was with William.
at the end of the day, i didn't love this story, but clearly a lot of people did. and i love that for them...but....this book completely missed the mark, made me vastly uncomfortable, and i will...probably not be picking up another book by this author. it was rough. i'm not even going to list the tropes because, well, i don't even know how to describe them.
thank you to the author agency and c.p. for my gifted copy.
November 27, 2024
Traumatic, slow burn perfection 🔥
CP did it again. This story is about human trafficking and has a lot of triggers so please take care of yourself!
ARC review:
William and Ryan are so sweet together. Ryan is non verbale and William is the founder of a rescue organization The Freedom Fighters, involved in rescuing people who have been trafficked. William has a personal stake in the story of Ryan who is reduced. And he is drawn to Ryan immediately. They form a bond and an undeniable attraction to each other.
William invites Ryan into his personal home to help him recover from a traumatic life of having been sold into the underworld of human trafficking. And since he’s non verbal and fragile he isn’t communicating what actually happened to him during his almost 20 years in captivity.
William is overly protective of him and won’t let anyone pry into his past either. William s mother is a wonderful side character you will cherish and love. She is strong and cares for her boys in a way that makes her imo a hero in this book.
You immediately realize that there is something more going on between these two fragile men then just an attraction and what we see on the surface. And that is what is so intriguing about this story. It’s a such a pageturner.
This is a slow dance of tenderness and secrets between two beautiful humans. But that doesn’t stop CP of adding her in-your-face spicy scenes (although late in the book) and her speciel touch of on edge uncomfortableness that makes her one of my top five favorite MM authors to read!
I don’t know how much I can say with out giving the plot away. This is definitely one of CP Harris‘s masterpieces and favorit of mine.
I cannot wait to read the rest of the upcoming books in this series.
CP did it again. This story is about human trafficking and has a lot of triggers so please take care of yourself!
ARC review:
William and Ryan are so sweet together. Ryan is non verbale and William is the founder of a rescue organization The Freedom Fighters, involved in rescuing people who have been trafficked. William has a personal stake in the story of Ryan who is reduced. And he is drawn to Ryan immediately. They form a bond and an undeniable attraction to each other.
William invites Ryan into his personal home to help him recover from a traumatic life of having been sold into the underworld of human trafficking. And since he’s non verbal and fragile he isn’t communicating what actually happened to him during his almost 20 years in captivity.
William is overly protective of him and won’t let anyone pry into his past either. William s mother is a wonderful side character you will cherish and love. She is strong and cares for her boys in a way that makes her imo a hero in this book.
You immediately realize that there is something more going on between these two fragile men then just an attraction and what we see on the surface. And that is what is so intriguing about this story. It’s a such a pageturner.
This is a slow dance of tenderness and secrets between two beautiful humans. But that doesn’t stop CP of adding her in-your-face spicy scenes (although late in the book) and her speciel touch of on edge uncomfortableness that makes her one of my top five favorite MM authors to read!
I don’t know how much I can say with out giving the plot away. This is definitely one of CP Harris‘s masterpieces and favorit of mine.
I cannot wait to read the rest of the upcoming books in this series.
November 28, 2024
♾️♾️♾️
🥹😭 I'm not okay 😭
🥹😭 I'm not okay 😭
December 11, 2024
“The pain is less now,” he said, “but the past still isn’t painless.”
nonverbal mc
touch aversion
interracial couple
6yr age gap
human trafficking
abuse of all kinds
i enjoyed this even though it's a lot heavier than what i usually read
mcs from the fisherman and the caretaker which i absolutely loved seeing
nonverbal mc
touch aversion
interracial couple
6yr age gap
human trafficking
abuse of all kinds
i enjoyed this even though it's a lot heavier than what i usually read
mcs from the fisherman and the caretaker which i absolutely loved seeing
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 30, 2024
A brand new C.P. Harris favourite. 10/10 Highly recommend.
A captivating depiction of trauma, healing and happiness.
A captivating depiction of trauma, healing and happiness.
November 19, 2024
“His breath smelled like caramel and hazelnut, like he’d secretly sampled both my popcorn and coffee when he’d prepared them for me. I wanted to taste him, to slip my tongue past the opening of his parted mouth and explore the flavor of him.”
There’s something magical about the way C.P. Harris writes angst—it cuts deep and stays with you. She doesn’t just tell you the story; she drags you into the very souls of her characters. You feel their every triumph, heartbreak, and moment of hope. It’s impossible not to feel fiercely protective of them. With William and Ryan, it’s no different.
Ryan’s pain is expected, given his history, but his non-verbal communication is so exquisitely written that it hits you harder than words ever could. Every gesture, every action speaks volumes, and it’s impossible not to ache for him. But William? William surprised me in the best way possible. At first, you think he’s the rock, the dependable one holding everything together. But then Harris peels back the layers, and you see a man quietly grappling with his own wounds. His strength masks a desperate story and need for connection. Watching him navigate his feelings and vulnerability had me my heart breaking.
And the longing between them? Ugh, it’s deliciously agonizing. Ryan’s touch aversion is handled with such tenderness and authenticity that it tugs at your heart. Their journey together is so raw, so powerful, that it leaves you breathless.
As always with C.P. Harris, the character development is nothing short of spectacular. Both William and Ryan are forced to break through their own emotional barriers, and the payoff is everything. Yes, it’s a slow burn, but trust me—it’s so worth it. And the ending? No spoilers, but argh, my heart!!!
There’s something magical about the way C.P. Harris writes angst—it cuts deep and stays with you. She doesn’t just tell you the story; she drags you into the very souls of her characters. You feel their every triumph, heartbreak, and moment of hope. It’s impossible not to feel fiercely protective of them. With William and Ryan, it’s no different.
Ryan’s pain is expected, given his history, but his non-verbal communication is so exquisitely written that it hits you harder than words ever could. Every gesture, every action speaks volumes, and it’s impossible not to ache for him. But William? William surprised me in the best way possible. At first, you think he’s the rock, the dependable one holding everything together. But then Harris peels back the layers, and you see a man quietly grappling with his own wounds. His strength masks a desperate story and need for connection. Watching him navigate his feelings and vulnerability had me my heart breaking.
And the longing between them? Ugh, it’s deliciously agonizing. Ryan’s touch aversion is handled with such tenderness and authenticity that it tugs at your heart. Their journey together is so raw, so powerful, that it leaves you breathless.
As always with C.P. Harris, the character development is nothing short of spectacular. Both William and Ryan are forced to break through their own emotional barriers, and the payoff is everything. Yes, it’s a slow burn, but trust me—it’s so worth it. And the ending? No spoilers, but argh, my heart!!!
December 3, 2024
I've been sitting on this review for a while now, trying to figure out how to put it into words. It was tough to read at times, and I had to take breaks to process what I was reading.
The characters are both carrying a lot of emotional baggage, and they go through a lot of growth and healing in the story.
If you're looking for a book that will mess you up and then put you back together, this is the one for you.
I'm not going to say anything else about it because it's one of those books that you need to experience for yourself.
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●Heed the trigger warnings●
The characters are both carrying a lot of emotional baggage, and they go through a lot of growth and healing in the story.
If you're looking for a book that will mess you up and then put you back together, this is the one for you.
I'm not going to say anything else about it because it's one of those books that you need to experience for yourself.
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•
•
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●Heed the trigger warnings●
December 4, 2024
2.5 stars. This is a difficult one to rate. It had some great moments and interesting turns, but there were also some things I just couldn't set aside. Why was William allowed to take Ryan home? He's not a trained professional, his house is not something like Safe Haven. Ryan didn't even have a medical before going with William. And then there's William. I get that he had a trauma too and was trying to right a wrong, but this was not the way to do it and it was very selfish, not what Ryan needed at all. The way he kind of made Ryan responsible for his happiness and how he was sexually attracted to him (and acted on it) early on was not good. And then the author really lost me with the scene where Ryan drinks to be able to be intimate with William and it turns into something too violent. Nope. Also, I'm no expert, but I find it very unbelievable that a person who hasn't been able to speak for 20 years, would start speaking in full sentences and whole conversations. I also didn't find the last sex scene believable. Maybe after a lot of therapy and small steps, but not at that point.
So, I liked the idea of this story very much and I was glued to the pages, but the issues I had with it were too serious to ignore.
So, I liked the idea of this story very much and I was glued to the pages, but the issues I had with it were too serious to ignore.
December 31, 2024
ARC review
This was a very emotional book, it really hit all my feelings happiness, sadness, disgust, anger, astonishment, confusion, yearning, and more.
Life hasn't been easy for these two. What Ryan went through, good Lord, NO ONE deserves that, that poor boy deserved better from the world. It just breaks my heart for all the people who fall victim to human trafficking. It wasm't easy for Ryan to learn to trust people again, it took time, patient and effort, but he finally did it and I was so freaking proud of him.
William was a broken man because of things that happened in his past and he was surviving every day instead of living. He helped as many people as he could and Ryan was the latest. Everything he could do to help Ryan, he did and would do it. Ryan made him want to live again.
They were each others rocks and it was so beautiful to see it, it really warmed my heart.
These boys deserved all the happiness in the world and I'm so glad they found it with each other, it was really special, their connection was just too strong to ignore and it guided them back from the darkness
This was a very emotional book, it really hit all my feelings happiness, sadness, disgust, anger, astonishment, confusion, yearning, and more.
Life hasn't been easy for these two. What Ryan went through, good Lord, NO ONE deserves that, that poor boy deserved better from the world. It just breaks my heart for all the people who fall victim to human trafficking. It wasm't easy for Ryan to learn to trust people again, it took time, patient and effort, but he finally did it and I was so freaking proud of him.
William was a broken man because of things that happened in his past and he was surviving every day instead of living. He helped as many people as he could and Ryan was the latest. Everything he could do to help Ryan, he did and would do it. Ryan made him want to live again.
They were each others rocks and it was so beautiful to see it, it really warmed my heart.
These boys deserved all the happiness in the world and I'm so glad they found it with each other, it was really special, their connection was just too strong to ignore and it guided them back from the darkness
November 24, 2024
ARC READ
I’ve spent a whole day now thinking of how to articulate my thoughts and I kind of wish this place had voice notes bc wow.
I lowkey (that’s a lie) high key didn’t trust the author with this book. Mostly because the themes are so delicate that from the start, I knew it was either going to be a hit or a miss. No in between.
And if you’re familiar with C.P Harris work, you know it can get uncomfortable pretty quickly especially with the spicy scenes. They’re hot till they put a voilent shiver in your system😵💫
So going into this, my expectations were low but I would actually like to apologize because wow. SLAY.
The slow burn was heartbreakingly beautiful. Both men depicted so perfectly with devastating character arcs that had me hooked from the beginning to the end.
On more than one occasion I was genuinely shocked and saying “what the fuck” over and over into the silence bc WHAT. THE. HELL?!😭
The story was beautiful. A masterpiece of lingering touches, love, longing, pain, betrayal, guilt, forgiveness and oh I felt the pain but it was so worth it.
I’ve spent a whole day now thinking of how to articulate my thoughts and I kind of wish this place had voice notes bc wow.
I lowkey (that’s a lie) high key didn’t trust the author with this book. Mostly because the themes are so delicate that from the start, I knew it was either going to be a hit or a miss. No in between.
And if you’re familiar with C.P Harris work, you know it can get uncomfortable pretty quickly especially with the spicy scenes. They’re hot till they put a voilent shiver in your system😵💫
So going into this, my expectations were low but I would actually like to apologize because wow. SLAY.
The slow burn was heartbreakingly beautiful. Both men depicted so perfectly with devastating character arcs that had me hooked from the beginning to the end.
On more than one occasion I was genuinely shocked and saying “what the fuck” over and over into the silence bc WHAT. THE. HELL?!😭
The story was beautiful. A masterpiece of lingering touches, love, longing, pain, betrayal, guilt, forgiveness and oh I felt the pain but it was so worth it.
November 23, 2024
This was my first CP Harris book and I cannot wait to read all of her others. The way she writes and makes you feel every emotion the characters are going through is perfect.
Only The Small Bones is about William and Ryan, both have been through unspeakable things. William has a foundation supporting survivors but takes Ryan home because Ryan is unable to speak and lashes out at everyone. They grow closer but when William's past comes to light, can they make their relationship last?
Only The Small Bones is about William and Ryan, both have been through unspeakable things. William has a foundation supporting survivors but takes Ryan home because Ryan is unable to speak and lashes out at everyone. They grow closer but when William's past comes to light, can they make their relationship last?
December 10, 2024
Rating: ⭐️⭐️
I finished this book three weeks ago and I’m still just as confused now about how I feel about the book, as I was the day I finished it.
CP Harris is one of my few auto read authors and I was really looking forward to a new release from her. Her books are always guaranteed to put me through all of the emotions. Unfortunately, this book just didn’t work for me.
I really struggled with William’s character for probably 75% of the book. The fact that he had such strong feelings for Ryan right from the start was so weird to me, and it made me uncomfortable. It was hard for me to understand how William could feel the way he did about Ryan when they weren’t even able to communicate in the beginning. Once Ryan started writing, it honestly made the situation worse for me. The fact that Ryan wrote and spelled like a child made him seem so much younger than he was and it kind of gave me the ick that William was lusting over him.
I also didn’t love how William wasn’t encouraging Ryan to go to therapy the entire time he was staying with him. It seemed like William was being selfish and didn’t want to help Ryan heal properly.
Now, once Ryan does leave and get the help he needed the book got a little better for me. I loved getting to see their text messages back and forth and it made Williams feelings make a little more sense. But then the big twist happens, and I was back to having mixed feelings. On one hand, it made the first 75% of the book make way more sense. But on the other hand, it made me mad that both MCs stayed silent for so long. If I was Ryan, I would’ve been even more mad at William. But instead they basically just act like everything is fine, have sex, and then the book pretty much ends kind of abruptly in my opinion.
With all of ther being said, I think if we had Ryan’s POV throughout the book it would’ve made it 100x better. If we could’ve seen what Ryan was thinking/feeling throughout the entire time it would’ve helped me not think William was as creepy.
I hope the rest of the books in the series are executed a little better because I do really love CPs writing and will continue to read her books.
I finished this book three weeks ago and I’m still just as confused now about how I feel about the book, as I was the day I finished it.
CP Harris is one of my few auto read authors and I was really looking forward to a new release from her. Her books are always guaranteed to put me through all of the emotions. Unfortunately, this book just didn’t work for me.
I really struggled with William’s character for probably 75% of the book. The fact that he had such strong feelings for Ryan right from the start was so weird to me, and it made me uncomfortable. It was hard for me to understand how William could feel the way he did about Ryan when they weren’t even able to communicate in the beginning. Once Ryan started writing, it honestly made the situation worse for me. The fact that Ryan wrote and spelled like a child made him seem so much younger than he was and it kind of gave me the ick that William was lusting over him.
I also didn’t love how William wasn’t encouraging Ryan to go to therapy the entire time he was staying with him. It seemed like William was being selfish and didn’t want to help Ryan heal properly.
Now, once Ryan does leave and get the help he needed the book got a little better for me. I loved getting to see their text messages back and forth and it made Williams feelings make a little more sense. But then the big twist happens, and I was back to having mixed feelings. On one hand, it made the first 75% of the book make way more sense. But on the other hand, it made me mad that both MCs stayed silent for so long. If I was Ryan, I would’ve been even more mad at William. But instead they basically just act like everything is fine, have sex, and then the book pretty much ends kind of abruptly in my opinion.
With all of ther being said, I think if we had Ryan’s POV throughout the book it would’ve made it 100x better. If we could’ve seen what Ryan was thinking/feeling throughout the entire time it would’ve helped me not think William was as creepy.
I hope the rest of the books in the series are executed a little better because I do really love CPs writing and will continue to read her books.
November 22, 2024
I’m still processing this book and I probably will be for a long while.
Only the Small Bones begins with William, a cinematic music composer and the founder of The Freedom Fighters Foundation, a non-profit organization to not only combat human trafficking but to also help the victims. He’s set up a residential home called Safe Haven for the victims where they can receive care, therapy and learn to reintegrate into normal society. William is summoned to the hospital by Detective Davidson after a cargo ship is found to have multiple victims of human trafficking and one of those individuals won’t cooperate with authorities so they can help him.
Ryan has been abused, malnourished, and sold to the highest bidder for the majority of his life. He’s angry and scared. He’s also non-verbal. He’s not sure what to think of William but he knows he CANNOT go into a group home, so he takes William up on his offer to stay in his home. To Ryan, all William has is simply unfair. Ryan’s life was stolen from him while William was allowed to live and make something of himself. Ryan needs to prove to himself and everyone else that he’s not worthless.
William is such a broken soul. He struggles with mental illness yet keeps putting aside his own wellbeing for that of others around him. His past haunts him at every turn. He cannot forget, he cannot move on. He’s stuck and there’s no light at the end of this dark tunnel. When Ryan comes into William’s life, William is battling his own demons while trying to navigate Ryan’s healing journey. He’s in over his head but can’t let Ryan go. His guilt over his past is consuming him and the constant reminders that litter his body ensure he will never outrun that which he left behind.
If I could give this book more than 5🌟 I absolutely would. I was heavily invested in this book from the beginning and ended up so enraptured with the story that I stayed up all night to finish it. At 4am and 79% through, I bawled like a baby. I was cracked wide open as William told his story and I don’t think I will ever forget this book.
This story is heavy, it has some dark themes and was an incredibly emotional read. I knew most of this going in as I’m an avid reader of this author’s work and was still caught off guard by my overall emotional reaction to parts of this story. The way the author handled a non-verbal MMC was nothing short of genius.
Much of this book is solely from William’s perspective which is highlighted in his inability to always read Ryan properly causing significant ups and downs for both men. It also helped highlight William’s own mental health struggles throughout the story and how those internal thoughts influenced his actions or reactions to Ryan’s behaviors. Viewing Ryan only from William’s perspective left the reader in the dark about a lot of Ryan’s emotions or struggles but ultimately served to enable the reader to fall in love with Ryan in the same way William did. The small touches that translated into a form of deep intimacy we rarely read about had me choked up. These men, specifically Ryan, created a love language all their own but then had to learn how to navigate and speak that language while tending to their own traumas. It was one of the most heartbreakingly beautifully written themes of love and intimacy I’ve read in a very long time.
This book is high angst, probably a 3/5 on the spice scale with much of the spice towards the end of the book but you won’t miss it. The character and plot development both get all the stars. The author really kept the pacing perfect throughout and you will be guessing at what’s really going on (while simultaneously being scared to find out) for most of the book. I truly cannot say enough things about this story. It will probably go down as one of my top reads ever and I will continue to think about these characters for a long time to come.
5🌟 all the way around.
Only the Small Bones begins with William, a cinematic music composer and the founder of The Freedom Fighters Foundation, a non-profit organization to not only combat human trafficking but to also help the victims. He’s set up a residential home called Safe Haven for the victims where they can receive care, therapy and learn to reintegrate into normal society. William is summoned to the hospital by Detective Davidson after a cargo ship is found to have multiple victims of human trafficking and one of those individuals won’t cooperate with authorities so they can help him.
Ryan has been abused, malnourished, and sold to the highest bidder for the majority of his life. He’s angry and scared. He’s also non-verbal. He’s not sure what to think of William but he knows he CANNOT go into a group home, so he takes William up on his offer to stay in his home. To Ryan, all William has is simply unfair. Ryan’s life was stolen from him while William was allowed to live and make something of himself. Ryan needs to prove to himself and everyone else that he’s not worthless.
William is such a broken soul. He struggles with mental illness yet keeps putting aside his own wellbeing for that of others around him. His past haunts him at every turn. He cannot forget, he cannot move on. He’s stuck and there’s no light at the end of this dark tunnel. When Ryan comes into William’s life, William is battling his own demons while trying to navigate Ryan’s healing journey. He’s in over his head but can’t let Ryan go. His guilt over his past is consuming him and the constant reminders that litter his body ensure he will never outrun that which he left behind.
If I could give this book more than 5🌟 I absolutely would. I was heavily invested in this book from the beginning and ended up so enraptured with the story that I stayed up all night to finish it. At 4am and 79% through, I bawled like a baby. I was cracked wide open as William told his story and I don’t think I will ever forget this book.
This story is heavy, it has some dark themes and was an incredibly emotional read. I knew most of this going in as I’m an avid reader of this author’s work and was still caught off guard by my overall emotional reaction to parts of this story. The way the author handled a non-verbal MMC was nothing short of genius.
Much of this book is solely from William’s perspective which is highlighted in his inability to always read Ryan properly causing significant ups and downs for both men. It also helped highlight William’s own mental health struggles throughout the story and how those internal thoughts influenced his actions or reactions to Ryan’s behaviors. Viewing Ryan only from William’s perspective left the reader in the dark about a lot of Ryan’s emotions or struggles but ultimately served to enable the reader to fall in love with Ryan in the same way William did. The small touches that translated into a form of deep intimacy we rarely read about had me choked up. These men, specifically Ryan, created a love language all their own but then had to learn how to navigate and speak that language while tending to their own traumas. It was one of the most heartbreakingly beautifully written themes of love and intimacy I’ve read in a very long time.
This book is high angst, probably a 3/5 on the spice scale with much of the spice towards the end of the book but you won’t miss it. The character and plot development both get all the stars. The author really kept the pacing perfect throughout and you will be guessing at what’s really going on (while simultaneously being scared to find out) for most of the book. I truly cannot say enough things about this story. It will probably go down as one of my top reads ever and I will continue to think about these characters for a long time to come.
5🌟 all the way around.
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