Did I Ever Tell You? a memoir

by Genevieve Kingston

The most “profound” (Booklist, starred review) memoir you will ever read about the power of love.



Did I Ever Tell You? reads like a novel but is an unforgettable true story.



Genevieve (Gwen) Kingston was just eleven years old when her mother passed away, leaving behind a chest filled with gifts and letters to celebrate the milestones of Gwen’s life and each of her birthdays until age thirty.



When Did I Ever Tell You? opens, just three packages remain: engagement, marriage, and first baby. Tracing Gwen’s coming-of-age, the book reveals a treasure hunt, with each gift and letter unveiling more about her mother, her family, and—ultimately—herself.



This transformative memoir is a moving coming-of age story and an “extraordinary testament to the power of love over death” (Sarah Ruhl, Pulitzer Prize finalist and author of Smile). Like Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner and The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch, Did I Ever Tell You? is a life-changing story that “has a scope and power that will take your breath away” (Ann Napolitano, New York Times bestselling author of Hello Beautiful and Dear Edward).

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Audiobook, Grief, Death, Biography Memoir, Biography

288 pages, Hardcover

First published April 16, 2024

About the author

Born and raised in the California Bay Area, Genevieve now lives in Brooklyn. She holds dual citizenship in the US and UK.
A graduate of UC Berkeley with degrees in Linguistics and Performance Studies, Genevieve has always loved language and storytelling.

She earned her MFA in acting at Brown University/Trinity Rep where she received the David Wickham Prize for Playwriting.

Her writing has appeared in The New York Times Modern Love column, and her plays have been performed at The Flea Theatre, White Heron Theatre Co., HB Studio and FaultLine Theater.

Reviews

[janine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Firstly what an honour to be the first to review on here, that's a first for me!

I'm not sure whether it's because I'm lucky enough to have an amazing bond and relationship with my Mum or the fact that I'm a mother to three incredible teens myself but MY GOD this hit hard.

Its hand on heart got to be the first book in a looooong time that has actually made me physically cry and not just cry but sob!

This is the memoir of Gwenny and her life living with and through her amazing mother's terminal cancer and then learning to live with her loss.

Gwenny's mother (mommy) tries to pave the way and make life a little more bearable after her passing by creating trunks for herself and her older brother Jamie. Each trunk was filled with gifts and letters for each birthday and special celebration they may come to through their adult lives.

The letters are heartbreakingly raw, honest and so full of love it bleeds from the pages, I could feel every emotion pulsing through each sentence. So whilst it was heartbreaking to read ot was also so amazingly beautiful.

Gwenny faces some agonisingly painful times *NO SPOILERS* which were sad to read but the honesty that has gone into this memoir makes them so much more relatable.

I don't want to go into much detail as it would most definitely spoil it for the reader but all I can say is 'wow'... if you love a memoir that makes you feel every emotion, feel human... this is a must read.

Massive thanks to netgalley and Quercus Books for the ARC.

[Nick Kofler · Rating 4 out of 5]

Welp….. I’m gonna go text my mom that I love her then go cry in a corner.

[Andi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you NetGalley for an advance copy of this memoir releasing in May. I wasn’t sure if I’d be strong enough for this book.. a daughters reflections on her moms death from cancer. But this book was comforting, reassuring me in feelings of loss, grief, moving on. It was so beautifully written and the Moms messages of love to her children were so special and touching. I could quote 20 things from the book I connected with but the biggest was how she loves to hear “ Did I ever tell you” then someone would share a memory of her parents. She would be transported back to that happy memory with them as they shared. Thus the title of the book…. That and so many other moments brought tears. My first 5 star read of 2024 💗.

[Jessica J. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh, my heart.

[Gigi Ropp · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book will haunt me. As a cancer survivor with young children, I spent so any days considering leaving them notes and writing them letters so they’d remember me. I hope to be able to come back and write a better review once it isn’t so fresh, but this was so beautiful that I am dealing with some trauma and can only say that it’s a stunning, raw memoir.

[DianaRose · Rating 5 out of 5]

a favorite read of 2025🩵

did i ever tell you? is a memoir that recounts the immense loss of our author, who lost her mother to a long and arduous battle of cancer as a child, and then her father to suicide as a young woman almost ten years to the day her mother died.

horribly depressing, and yet extremely hopeful.

[Jade · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think this has taken a part of my soul and all that’s left for me to do is cry

[Kim (Mrs.) Keith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kingston provides readers with a beautiful and raw retelling of a young girl preparing for and grieving her mother's fall to cancer. As Kingston grieves, she finds solace in both the stories her mother leaves behind as well as the shared memories of friends turned family. Despite the recurrence of broken relationships around her, Kingston ultimately forges her own way in life and love. Readers will feel encouraged by Kington's honest portrayal of life after death.

[Audrey’s version · Rating 5 out of 5]

Before reading this memoir, I had never ventured into the genre, assuming it wouldn’t be to my liking. However, I recently came across a quote suggesting that to understand people better, one should read actual stories rather than psychology books. With that in mind, I started reading this book and quickly fell in love with it. Though I cannot fully imagine what the author went through, I am deeply grateful and touched to have experienced her story.

What I found most compelling about this book is that the title’s meaning only becomes clear near the very end. By the time it does, you’re already deeply connected to the characters and the storyline, making the revelation all the more impactful. This memoir evoked strong emotions in me, which is precisely what a great story should do. I truly enjoyed it.

[Tommy Nyfenger · Rating 5 out of 5]

I lost body weight in tears bc of this book

[The-grateful-spoonie · Rating 5 out of 5]

✉️🎁 𝔻𝕚𝕕 𝕀 𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕖𝕝𝕝 𝕪𝕠𝕦? 🎁✉️
Author -  Genevieve Kingston
Genevieve has such a beautiful way of writing in this heartbreaking memoir about death,  grief, and family.
As a very young child, her mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Her mother prepared for her kids to have a life without her by forming letters, cassette tapes, and packages for their birthdays and other impodates throughout their lives. Without giving spoilers, this is both a heartbreaking and a heartwarming read as we learn about the keepsakes Gwenny receives and how she grows up and tackles her grief.
....
"Did I ever tell you" had become my five favourite words. They signalled that I was about to be transported, carried on the magic of someone else's words, into the past.

[Kendall Hammonds · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m not crying I’ve just got something in my eye.

[Stacy40pages · Rating 5 out of 5]

Did I Ever Tell You by Genevieve Kingston #botmselection ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

A memoir on loss and grief, Gwen Kingston takes us into her life grieving her mother who passed away when Dn was eleven. Her mother left her with a chest of letters and gifts to open on birthdays and milestones.

I knew this one was going to be sad going into it, and it was definitely a tear-jerker. It was also such a true and raw portrayal of grief. As someone who has been lucky enough not to lose a close loved one, this was eye opening to me. It shows how loss at a young age affects one as they mature. The effort the author’s mother put into this project was incredible and this really made for a worthy and truly emotional read.

“Sometimes I wondered why a fairy would ever want to belong to a human family when it was the hardest, most painful thing in the world.”

“Her words, written to bridge the gap between us, cut through space and time. I read them again and again.”

Did I Ever Tell You is available now.

[Jena · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

Beautifully written but incredibly difficult and heavy to get through.

[Shannon (The Book Club Mom) · Rating 4 out of 5]

My gosh, this memoir was extremely sad and heartbreaking, yet quite touching and warm. It acts as a beautiful tribute to Kingston’s mother who she lost too soon to terminal cancer. Before she died, Kingston’s mother filled a chest full of gifts and notes for her daughter to open as she reached future milestones—birthdays, graduation, wedding, first baby, etc. On these special days, Kingston still felt her mother’s presence and received her words of wisdom. What an amazing gift to give your child. This truly touched my heart. I highly recommend this powerful memoir that’s focused on family, loss, grief, love, and hope.

[Jordan · Rating 5 out of 5]

TW: Cancer, Death, Death of a parent, Depression/ Anxiety and Suicide

A beautifully written memoir about a daughters relationship with her mother who passed away from cancer when she was a child. As a daughter of a parent who was very sick when I was a child I related to this book quite a bit.

[Ellie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is so beautifully sad. I cried my way through Gwen’s written experience of living the majority of her life without her mom. I was so deeply moved by the way she wrote about the complexity of grief, joy & guilt that comes from confronting a life without such an important person.

I admire Gwen’s vulnerability in sharing the intimate letters and mementos that her mother left for her to discover at multiple crucial moments and milestones. Her writing is incredibly courageous and tender - this memoir is true art.

And mom, if you’re reading this, I love you!

[Maggie Odegaard · Rating 4 out of 5]

a really really beautiful memoir. i love my mom and i love women.

[Jenna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simply put: this is a roadmap of grief and love from a daughter to the mother she lost.

I don’t like to star my memoirs but this stirred up a lot of emotions for me thinking about my MIL and the letters I asked her to write for her daughter before she died. At 22 yrs old, not even sure how I thought of the idea, but I did, and I wish we had done more then just graduation, 13,16,18 and 21.

But while I think of the past, I also love that the author has given her mother a voice even if she’s no longer with her 🩷

….the voice doesn’t leave when it’s used.

“So what matters at the end? Being true to ourselves and each other. Loving and being loved. Kindness and compassion. Being remembered with pleasure. Leaving the least amount of harm and pain and suffering behind us that we can….
You two have taught me everything I know about love…”

[Zibby Owens · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a poignant and heartfelt memoir about the enduring legacy left by the author's late mother. Following her mother's passing, the author discovered a cardboard chest filled with gifts and letters, carefully prepared for significant life milestones and birthdays up until she turned 30. The author recounts the experience of losing her mother at the age of 11, and how she found solace and connection through the treasures in the chest.

The book delves into themes of memory, grief, and love, exploring the profound impact of the mother's legacy on the author's life. It is a story of family, memory, love, and loss, illustrating how we can honor our parents' legacies while forging our own paths and discovering our true selves.

To listen to the interview with the author, visit my podcast at: https://zibbymedia.com/blogs/transcri...

[Erin Lehouiller · Rating 4 out of 5]

A heartbreaking story of loss, but showed the immense love a mother has for her children even after she’s gone 💗 I loved that it was the daughter who narrated the audiobook, too!

[Dee · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like this book because it encourages you to talk to the people in your life about loss and the beauty of life. The title was appropriately penned.

[Farrah · Rating 3 out of 5]

For whatever reason, I just never felt deeply connected to the book / author. I expected to really feel a lot of things while reading it but somehow it felt a little flat to me.

[Nicole Vasilev · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Did I Ever Tell You?” emerges as a testament to resilience and love, touching on topics of grief, love, and family. Genevieve (Gwen) Kingston’s mother faces a terminal cancer diagnosis when Gwen was just three years old. Despite this, her mother goes on to live another eight years. In that time, she fills a chest filled with letters and gifts for both Gwen and her brother Jamie, ensuring ways for them to be able to receive her love and guidance throughout their major milestones up to age thirty, for even long after she’s gone. Through cherished memories and stories, Kingston reveals the legacy her mother has left behind.

In this memoir, Gwen deals with the raw emotions that accompany loss, yet also learns how to have hope and resilience amidst it all. It’s an honest and raw story, as we follow the beginning of her mother’s cancer diagnosis, and how it ends up affecting relationships in the family, and ultimately Gwen’s own upbringing. Throughout the memoir, we are also faced with the present Gwen who is writing the book, giving us an outlook on her life now in her thirties, and how she has begun to navigate the complexities of grief, family, and mental trauma. She also reflects on the profound legacy her mother has left behind, still letting herself be guided by her mother’s words all these years later.

This memoir serves as a universal narrative of love and loss, a testament on the human spirit and how we begin to overcome grief, finding solace in cherished memories. It’s a testament to Kingston’s resilience but also the resilience of the human race. Kingston’s memoir is beautiful and is sure to tug at your heartstrings and linger in your mind for a long time yet.

[mar · Rating 4 out of 5]

En primer lugar, me gustaría hacer mención a lo preciosa que es la portada. No he encontrado el nombre de la persona que la ha diseñado, pero estoy obsesionada.

El libro es precioso. La primera tercera parte sí que es verdad que me sentía un poco como que esta historia ya la había leído antes. Sin embargo, las dos siguientes han sido devastadoras y preciosas a partes iguales. Es extraño juzgar una autobiografía porque al fin y al cabo es la vida de la escritora, pero narrativamente puedo decir que me ha parecido que estaba muy bien cuidado. Siento que si eres una persona en la década de los 20 este libro te puede aportar lecciones muy importantes.

Muy bonito el libro lo recomendaría.

Checkead los trigger warnings antes de leerlo <3

[Anita Pomerantz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Exquisite!!

If this book doesn't touch your heart, nothing will.

Genevieve does an amazing job of conveying her experience of losing her mom to cancer in a way that isn't maudlin or overdone in any way, but is uplifting and in so many ways, a love story.

Based on a Modern Love essay in the New York Times, this memoir illuminates maternal love like no other. But it also tells the story of childhood resilience in the face of loss. I love memoirs in general and read plenty of them. This one deserves wide readership.

[Victoria Liboiron · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m not sure how it happens that many of the books I rate 5 stars I haven’t discovered on Goodreads or a recommendation of a friend or even heard of at all before picking it up? I stumbled upon this book in the library and picked it up on a whim and it really turned into a powerful reading experience for me. Books are unique because they really do allow you to transport yourself through another’s mind and life experience… books be wild for that.

Kingston is masterful in her telling of her life’s story—it truly does read like a novel and I’ll never understand how someone can tell their own story with such detail and clarity?! Containing both poetic prose, heartbreaking storytelling, and sage life advice that I believe everyone should read. I commend her vulnerability in sharing the gifts and letters her mother left her—her mother’s wisdom and words will leave you speechless. This book will have you reflecting upon your own mortality, examining your personal relationships with your own parents and loved ones, and crying alone in your bed at night (me, an empath) 🥲

[Lauren Marth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow… This makes me want to hug my mom and never let her go 🥺

“I wanted her to wake up and ask me the right questions. I would have told her that I knew she’d done the best she could, the best anyone could. I would have told her that I felt guilty every day about the hours I spent away from her, about the times I wanted to be away from her, and the horrible, stupefying sadness that filled the room where she was slowly losing herself. I would have told her I felt guiltiest of all that part of me wanted this to finally be over, so I could begin to remember her the way she used to be, instead of the way she was now.”

[Ellie Pereda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a hauntingly beautiful memoir. “Love is stronger than death” this book is truly devastating yet fiercely shows how a mother love can give you both grief and hope. Please tell your mom that you love her

[Zoe Wilson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Oh wow, my heart hurts. I’m speechless. This was devastatingly good. Reading this mostly in my childhood home/bedroom was perhaps not the wisest choice for my emotional well-being but here we are!