I Hate Dragons

by Brandon Sanderson

In December 2010, Brandon posted a note on his Twitter feed suggesting a dialogue writing exercise. This is his result.

"For those who are following along, here’s what I did for my writing exercise. I actually managed to make it something of a self-contained story." - Brandon

Genres: Fantasy, Short Stories, Fiction, Humor, Dragons, High Fantasy, Novella

36 pages

First published December 28, 2010

About the author

I’m Brandon Sanderson, and I write stories of the fantastic: fantasy, science fiction, and thrillers.

The release of Wind and Truth in December 2024—the fifth and final book in the first arc of the #1 New York Times bestselling Stormlight Archive series—marks a significant milestone for me. This series is my love letter to the epic fantasy genre, and it’s the type of story I always dreamed epic fantasy could be. Now is a great time to get into the Stormlight Archive since the first arc, which begins with Way of Kings, is complete.

During our crowdfunding campaign for the leatherbound edition of Words of Radiance, I announced a fifth Secret Project called Isles of the Emberdark, which came out in the summer of 2025. Coming December 2025 is Tailored Realities, my non-Cosmere short story collection featuring the new novella Moment Zero.

Defiant, the fourth and final volume of the series that started with Skyward in 2018, came out in November 2023, capping an already book-filled year that saw the releases of all four Secret Projects: Tress of the Emerald Sea, The Frugal Wizard’s Handbook for Surviving Medieval England, Yumi and the Nightmare Painter, and The Sunlit Man. These four books were all initially offered to backers of the #1 Kickstarter campaign of all time.

November 2022 saw the release of The Lost Metal, the seventh volume in the Mistborn saga, and the final volume of the Mistborn Era Two featuring Wax & Wayne. Now that the first arc of the Stormlight Archive is wrapped up, I’ve started writing the third era of Mistborn in 2025.

Most readers have noticed that my adult fantasy novels are in a connected universe called the Cosmere. This includes The Stormlight Archive, both Mistborn series, Elantris, Warbreaker, four of the five Secret Projects, and various novellas, including The Emperor’s Soul, which won a Hugo Award in 2013. In November 2016 all of the existing Cosmere short fiction was released in one volume called Arcanum Unbounded. If you’ve read all of my adult fantasy novels and want to see some behind-the-scenes information, that collection is a must-read.

I also have three YA series: The Rithmatist (currently at one book), The Reckoners (a trilogy beginning with Steelheart), and Skyward. For young readers I also have my humorous series Alcatraz vs. the Evil Librarians, which had its final book, Bastille vs. the Evil Librarians, released in 2022. Many of my adult readers enjoy all of those books as well, and many of my YA readers enjoy my adult books, usually starting with Mistborn.

Additionally, I have a few other novellas that are more on the thriller/sci-fi side. These include the three stories in Legion: The Many Lives of Stephen Leeds, as well as Perfect State and Snapshot. These two novellas are also featured in 2025’s Tailored Realities. There’s a lot of material to go around!

Good starting places are Mistborn (a.k.a. The Final Empire), Skyward, Steelheart, The Emperor’s Soul, Tress of the Emerald Sea, and Alcatraz vs. the Evil Librarians. If you’re already a fan of big fat fantasies, you can jump right into The Way of Kings.

I was also honored to be able to complete the final three volumes of The Wheel of Time, beginning with The Gathering Storm, using Robert Jordan’s notes.

Sample chapters from all of my books are available at brandonsanderson.com—and check out the rest of my site for chapter-by-chapter annotations, deleted scenes, and more.

Reviews

[Anna [Bran. San. Stan] · Rating 4 out of 5]

Three too-short chapters of wonderful tongue-in-cheek writing that originally started out as an even shorter dialogue-writing exercise.*

The premise involves Skip‘s (magic) knack for smelling delicious to dragons which makes him the perfect bait in the dragon-hunting business - a dangerous job he understandably wants to quit.

Another knack he has is hearing spelling and punctuation, which I just found a delightful idea. Though I’m glad that’s not a gift I have as it would drive me insane, it was really fun to read about:

“Climb on up here.”
“You’ll eat me.”
“That’s the idea.”
“Then I think I’ll decline.”
“Oh, come now. It won’t be so bad as you think. They’re will he hardly any pain at all.”
“I don’t care if there’s pain or not. I’ll still be dead. And you used the wrong version of ‘they’re.’ You wanted there instead.”
“I did? How can you tell? They’res no difference in the sounds they make.”
“Actually, I can hear apostrophes.”
“What, really?”
“Yes. I can hear spelling too, actually. It’s my other knack.”

I really hope Sanderson will add to those three chapters at some point and make it a novella!

In the meantime, check out
https://www.brandonsanderson.com/i-ha... for the extended version or
https://www.brandonsanderson.com/i-ha... for the dialogue-only, one-chapter-only version.

*Rules for the writing exercise as stated on his website:

“Write a five- to ten-page two-character dialogue with no tags or blocking. Try to evoke character, conflict, and plot using only dialogue. Include: a problem, two distinct individuals, a fantasy/sf element. Avoid: long monologues, exposition. Use context, not explanations.“
https://www.brandonsanderson.com/writ...

[Bradley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Having someone throw this at me (Trish) and run off, I had to read it.

At first glance, it's very self-conscious and writing conscious and self-referential and for all these things... it's a mess. But it's supposed to be a mess. I can see that.

He fiddled around with it between projects, just playing around!

But for all that, it's still funny and clever and all over the place and weird, so there's that going for it!

BAIT indeed.

(Just between you and me, I think this bait is working on MANY levels. Drawing in poor unsuspecting victims to his writing being only ONE of them.) :)

[TS Chan · Rating 4 out of 5]

A delightful mere 3-chapter short story arising from a dialogue-writing exercise. This was funny and entertaining, showcasing Sanderson's creativity and ability in writing snappy shorts. Another one of those (pretty much all of his shorter works honestly), which I end up with "I want more!"

[Mario · Rating 5 out of 5]

Why isn't this a full-length novel?!

[Trish · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a delightful short story (or playing around to freshen up the author's palate as it was called) and my first encounter with this author. I've heard about him, of course, but was never sure I'd like his writing. In this, I did.

The story is about a young boy living in a magical world where people have knacks (sort of like tiny magical abilities). Some people even have more than one. Skip, the boy, has at least two: being able to hear spelling/punctuation when people speak (on top of knowing languages in general) and smelling delicious to dragons. It's the latter that got him a job with a group of dragon hunters a few months ago and a whole lot of trouble.

As a linguist, I very much enjoyed all the plays with words and grammar and totally understood Skip's problem.
Skip sighed. It was the same story. The world seemed quite willing to accept misunderstood artists, misunderstood thieves, and even peasants who dreamed of royalty. But nobody knew what to do with a misunderstood philologist. Other than run him out of town for bringing the dragons down on them.

Moreover, the author manages to pack quite a number of clever things to think about into this short story, such as the general nature of miscommunication/misunderstandings and political repercussions, free will, fate, the true meaning of intelligence etc. All wrapped in a light tone and cool sense of humour.

[Molly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Young Skip earns his meals working as a living bait ... for dragons (who find his scent intoxicating, a Happy Meal on two legs), and dreams of becoming a lexicographer. Cute and witty.

“Skip smelled great to dragons.

He was irresistible, actually. He was like catnip to enormous, murderous reptiles. One whiff of him drove them into a frenzy, drawing their attention completely. People tended to be quite impressed by this knack. Or, at least, impressed that Skip had survived as long as he had while possessing it.”



Rating, 3.5

Actually it was pretty great, but where is the rest? I feel a little cheated. When and if we get the ending, I'll probably up the rating.

[Daniel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Smesna i zabavna prica o kojoj bi rado voleo da citam vise. I odlican eksperiment u pisanju koristeci samo razgovor za razvoj price.

[Jesse · Rating 4 out of 5]

Is it weird how much I enjoyed that? Please finish the story, Brandon, brother.

Read for free on BrandoSando's website.

[Caleb M. · Rating 4 out of 5]

Skip is a man with 2 knacks. Smelling delectable to dragons, and hearing people's spelling. Apostrophes and all.

Nobody uses the same spellings. Why, just today, I’ve heard the word dragon spelled ‘dragoon,’ ‘daragon,’ ‘dragen,’ ‘deragin,’ and ‘blarsnaf.’”

“Er . . . ‘blarsnaf’?”

“That was from Pug the cook. He speaks Lukarvian, but the word should actually be spelled ‘blarsnef’ in his language. You see what I have to put up with?”

“No.”

This was a fantastic short story. Brandon Sanderson continues to amaze with with how much I enjoy each and every book or short story I read by him. Sure, there are some better than others, but they are all fun in their own right.

And this one is like a dream come true for me. I love dragons. I always have, and I probably always will. I find them fascinating and I think that they can be done in so many different ways. Smart creatures or bumbling beasts. Ancient gods or despised devils. The list goes on and I love it. So when I found out Sanderson had a short story about dragons, of course I had to read it! My favorite author with my (probably) favorite mythical creature, heck yes!

Dragons were dangerous in the sky. Of course, they were dangerous on the ground too. Just less dangerous. In the same way that a sword is less dangerous so long as it’s pointed at someone else.

This story has exactly what to expect from Sanderson. Witty dialogue and a fun story. I love the main character. Even though this is only three short chapters long, I found myself wanting to read more about Skip. And more about the priestess. The dialogue between a dragon a Skip was so much fun to read and I just want more.

“That’s . . . interesting, child. Very interesting. Well, time to get this over with. No use in delaying. Come on up and be eaten.”
“You don’t make a very compelling argument.”

As always there is a possibility that Sanderson goes back to this world, but I find it extremely unlikely. But I am gonna hold out some massive hope that he does decide to return, for there is only one book I want Sanderson to write more than a novel featuring dragons.

My one complaint about this short story is the ending. It was fitting, and I typically like the kind of endings that this one had, but I was disappointed....for reasons I can't say without spoilers. But I would love to talk about it so feel free to message me or tag spoilers in the comments!!

Sanderson, if you are listening, Please write a full length book set in this world. Or at the very least another short story. I for one would pre-order it the second I heard about it.

Try weighing approximately as much as a small house and see how easy it is for you to fly.

[Kitty G Books · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a small short story which is on Sanderson's website and is free to read and it's certainly one that I'd recommend you go and try out. It's a story about a young man named Skip and his magical allure for Dragons. He lives in a world where people all have 'knacks' which allow them to do magical or interesting things such as lure Dragons to them (by smelling so yummy) or hear grammar whilst people talk (probably the most interesting idea in this novella).

I really enjoyed this short story and the ideas which contributed to it, and I think that it's certainly a great start to a potential future book (if he decides to continue as the end is rather open to interpretation). One thing I particularly liked seeing was Sanderson bringing Dragons into his writing as this is fairly unusual for him and I think he did this very well, I'd like a full length Dragon book from him, it could be brilliant!

Overall a 4.5*s fun little read and one I would certainly recommend for Sanderson fans :)

[itsdanixx]

A fun, interesting and unique short story about a group of dragon hunters and the guy who's used as bait. It's just a (very) short story so I'm not going to rate it, but since it takes less than five minutes to read (and that's the extended version) and it's available for free on Brandon Sanderson's website, I'd definitely recommend it.

[Chase Sears · Rating 3 out of 5]

Review for original version:

While not excellent or epic at all, it being a writing exercise with only dialogue, the original cut version of I Hate Dragons makes for a light-hearted and humorous timepasser. This is a very good story for ten pages. Skip and his boss are well established characters that are both hilarious and both have their own different likeable things. Skip is a bright boy, and an especially savvy negotiator. His boss is relatively stubborn and not very bright, but gives in to Skip's negotiations. There is a plot, and a conflict. Skip wants a raise, and he wants to become a dragon hunter. But he is being used as bait. This was a fun short read. Rating:3.5/5 stars.

Review for extended edition:

The extended version has the same general character development, conflict, and plot as the original, but the story has much more depth because it isn't just dialogue. A sorceress is introduced and at first appears threatening, but is later revealed to just want Skip's help. This one is better, as the story rtains its humor but a layer of depth is added. Another fun short read. Rating: 4/5 stars.

Overall, this was a fun read if you want something extremely short and funny. 3.75/5 stars.

[... · Rating 3 out of 5]

Short & fun, but not the best story out there. Sanderson can do so much better :3

[Todd · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very short story, but quite amusing

[Chad Plummer · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was cute

[Raghav Bhatia]

Way. Too. Fun.

[ZeN · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a short story that developed by way of a writing exercise. As such it is very creatively fun in its splendid brevity. Likely less than a dozen pages it snaps, crackles and pops enough to be an enjoyable read in one sitting.

[Navdha · Rating 3 out of 5]

Now I want at least a novella dedicated to this story. Why do I keep doing this to myself?

[Lukas Lovas · Rating 5 out of 5]

I laughed really hard while reading this :D Short and wonderful. I wish there was more of it :)

[viih · Rating 3 out of 5]

Em 2010, Brandon comentou nas redes sociais sobre exercícios de diálogos, e essa história é basicamente isso.

Em "I Hate Dragons", temos apenas Brandon Sanderson em seu habitat natural.

Uma história pequena, de 3 capítulos, nos quais Sanderson está treinando diálogos, sim, literalmente treinando diálogos

Pontos negativos? É mais um short story do Brandon que fico na angústia querendo saber mais e mais.

Pontos positivos? Tem dragões, então... isso já diz muita coisa..

[Kinga · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was, without a doubt, the shortest thing I have ever read by Brandon Sanderson.

Considering that it was nothing more than a writing excercise, I'm not disappointed, even if we only got four short chapters - and the third was missing.

Skip's unique powers were pretty interesting though, and I liked the general idea behind this story. I only wish it would have been longer.

[Narmeen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Along with being unique with his "power system," he is also humorous. By he I mean Brandon Sanderson and his character Skip, so basically Brandon Sanderson. Loved it, loved it and loved it.

[Mountainroot · Rating 5 out of 5]

Είναι δωρεάν για ανάγνωση στο site του.
Είναι βασισμένο σε μία άσκηση που έκανε. Είναι όλο ένας τεράστιος διάλογος. Αστείος και άκρως κωμικός.

Διαβάστε το για να γελάσετε. Λογικά θα σας πάρει 10 λεπτά περίπου.

[Lau · Rating 4 out of 5]

Es genial, muy divertido! será "sólo" un ejercicio de escritura, pero es buenísimo.

Seguí escribiendo Sanderson! no puede quedar sólo en un diálogo de unas pocas páginas. Espero que retome esos capítulos que dice que escribió.

[Nighteye · Rating 5 out of 5]

funny and enjoyable piece of short fiction in dialouge form about a boy being inresistable smelling to dragons and the team of hunters hunting dragons.

[Amanda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Winter 2021 (January);

This was written as a writing exercise with the internet, as a challenge to tell an entire story in just dialogue. It's a good showing of Sanderon's ability to bandy the spoken (rather than just 'written' word) and to develop characterization only through what people say to themesleves/each other. But. It's definitely missing the magic of Sanderson's prose, which I found myself missing even as he completed the challenge as set out in the rules.

[Jasmine · Rating 4 out of 5]

On my way to read Brandon Sanderson’s entire back list ✌🏼

[Mateusz Surowiec · Rating 4 out of 5]

xDDD

[Cait | GoodeyReads · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very unique short story. I liked the experimenting with only dialogue!

[Jordan Thomas · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5/5 Stars

This is one of Sandersons "funny" stories...not my thing