Mothering Boys: 8 Things Your Son Needs from You before He Turns 10

by Molly Defrank

Boys today are surrounded by accusations that their very existence is toxic, told that their biological makeup is a problem and that the future is female. As Christian moms, we have the responsibility and privilege of teaching our boys what is true about who they are and what isn't. But how do we grow these tiny (and somewhat smelly) wild things into godly men of character?

With encouragement, hope, and a dash of humor, popular writer and fellow mom-in-the-trenches Molly DeFrank reveals the eight most critical things your son needs right now. Rooted in biblical truth, real parenting stories, and current research, this go-to guide is packed with simple, practical, easy-to-implement--and fun!--ideas and activities to help you
· create meaningful connection with your son
· cultivate his character
· equip him to flourish right where he is
· give him a solid foundation in an ever-shifting culture

In a world of giants and lions, you can raise up the next generation of Davids and Daniels. And you can do it while driving carpool, folding mountains of laundry, building model sets, eating dinner, and tucking them in for the night.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

224 pages, Paperback

Published May 6, 2025

About the author

Molly DeFrank is the founder of the online Digital Detox, where she helps free families from their addictions to devices. She has a degree in international relations and worked as a press aide for former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. These days, she is a stay-at-home mom and foster mom to five kids ages eleven and under. She spends most of her time telling them to put on their shoes.

Reviews

[Chelsey (a_novel_idea11) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’m always down for a good parenting book and I’ll take all the advice I can get. Some situations call for it all and you just never know what might do the trick!

I was particularly excited for Mothering Boys as I’m a mother to a boy myself. Conner is nearly 4 and ALL boy. We play all the trains, have all the bruises, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Mothering Boys has so many real world examples to keep things fun, stay present, and connect with our boys. I particularly loved the little things I can implement daily like making eye contact, talking about my own feelings, discussing his goals and how to accomplish them, and including him in chores. A lot of pieces were reassuring too—for example, not only is it okay to let your kid be bored sometimes but it’s actually a good thing!

There’s so much pressure out there on us moms so I always love hearing other perspectives and feelings reassurances that we’re all doing the best we can. And more importantly, that our best is enough. I once heard that if you’re worried about being a good mom and working everyday to be the best mom you can be, you’re already succeeding. So if you needed to hear it, know you are crushing it. Our kids are lucky to have us!

Mothering Boys does skew very religious which may or may not be for you. Even apart from the religion, this book has practical parenting advice and gave a lot of great insight.

Thank you to TLC Book Tours for the copy!

[Ginny Yurich · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love Molly DeFrank!! Digital Detox is such a fabulous book so I was excited to read this one. Another homerun by Molly. It hits on the importance of these earlier childhood years for sons and why hands-on, in-person life really matters.

[Emily Musgrove · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you have a son, even if he’s older than 10, this is a book filled with practical tips and biblical encouragement for giving our boys a strong foundation that will help them as they grow into adulthood. I appreciated her funny one liners, the camaraderie she obviously feels with other boy moms, and the simple advice that didn’t seem overwhelming to implement. I have lots of tools in my tool belt now that I can use with my son. One of my favorite parts was a list of conversation starters to use in the car or over a meal.

[Meagan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to Molly and Bethany House for this gifted book!*

Title: Mothering Boys
Author: Molly DeFrank
Genre: Nonfiction/Parenting

Review: “God has called you to mother this exact boy at this exact time. He knows your heart, and He knows your son’s heart. He calls you to be faithful to your job as mother…” Any mama who has a son needs to pick up this book. Molly breaks down 8 things your boy needs to know before he turns 10. There are topics such as belonging, authority, bravery, and fun. I love Molly’s tone throughout these pages. It feels like sitting at a park date and sharing fun stories with wisdom and biblical truth thrown in (in the best way!). I also loved the practical tips all throughout the book. There are conversation starters, action steps, and age-appropriate activities to start practicing what Molly shares. Mothering Boys is not for the faint of heart especially when there is such an attack on biblical masculinity today. If you’re looking for a book to encourage your heart, inspire your parenting, and point to biblical truth, I’d highly recommend this one!

Star Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

*I received a complimentary copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions expressed in this review are my own.

[Powell Kenerly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Admittedly I am normally skeptical of these kinds of books, but I want to give this book to not just boy moms, but anyone who interacts with kids regularly. Such a good mix of biblical, statistical, and practical commentary. Want to reread when Lane is 2ish!

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m a dad of 3 boys. I don’t want to be a reactive parent, just trying my best to react well to whatever challenges arise in parenting. I want to be proactively teaching and providing my sons the things they need to thrive and succeed. That’s why I love this book so much. It is practical and easy to understand. If you want an actionable book about how to be a proactive parent of boys, this is exactly what you need.

[Sadie VanderKodde · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved DeFrank's book Digital Detox, so I was excited to see this book by her - especially since my son is turning 10 in 6 months. Whew! Honestly, this book inspired the same feeling in me that Digital Detox did: conviction paired with dread. Actually, this one is a little worse. Haha. She has so many practical ideas and ways to put her advice into action, but it seems so overwhelming. And the teachable moments? How does she know what to say? Those kind of words just don't come to mind when my son is misbehaving. But I know it's necessary and worth it, and her tone is encouraging throughout - reminding moms that things won't change overnight, that were called to faithfulness not success, and that God loves our sons even more than we do. May he give me the grace to raise mine well - even when it's hard, uncomfortable, or thankless.

[Sarah Rodebush]

This parenting book was extremely Christian-focused, which I thought I’d connect with more as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, but I was surprised that the doctrine/beliefs shared continuously throughout this book frequently differed from my own!

The “8 things” that the author said our boys should learn before age 10 were: Belonging, Relationship, Authority, Fun, Bravery, Tenderness, Creativity & Emotional Durability. All important things!

The main takeaways I got from this that I’d like to implement more in our family were:
- Regular family dinners
- More face to face connective interaction between parents & kids (increased eye contact & conversation)
- More outdoor free play for our boys
- Less screen time
- More sleep for our kids
- Teaching our kids to identify, process, and communicate feelings and emotions

[Melissa Ree · Rating 5 out of 5]

Calling all BOY MOMS! This book is such a great read! In this book, Molly address your role as a Mom in teaching and supporting your son’s growth in eight key areas he will need a good foundation in as he grows toward biblical masculinity.

Molly gives lots of real world parenting advice. She encourages Moms through humor, real world examples, and a biblical viewpoint.

Her writing is down to earth, relatable, and so very timely and relative.

FIVE+ stars!!!

[Nicholas Pokorny · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book would score higher if it were geared towards parenting children (not just focusing on boys). The author almost gets it but fails to. Her agenda on building up boys via mothering boys needs to be done for some faulty and skewed reason stated in the beginnings of this book. Around 90-95% of her advice about raising boys could be transferred to girls (and some of the advice she gives she bemoans not having it when she was a novice).

[Sarah Easton · Rating 4 out of 5]

I won this book in. Goodreads Giveaway. Thank you to Bethany and Goodreads for selecting me!!

Pretty good book. Nothing super groundbreaking but I dont believe that was Defranks goal. A lot of her content in this read seemed to normalize the crazy and encourage boy moms using her own personal accounts and biblical stories and verses. I liked it. Thought it would be more but it isn't bad. Would recc to other Christian boy moms I know.

[Kasey Estupiñan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was rubbed the wrong way by the sleep training advice! I always have a hard time with people saying that what worked for them and their family is what everyone should do, and especially so when they put it in the moral framework of “if you’re not doing this you’re not giving your kids the gift of rest”.

Other than that, the book was very biblically rooted and had lots of practical ideas.

[Hannah Lugibihl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another fantastic, must-read book from Molly DeFrank. I love her relatable and humorous writing style so much. Pair that with solid info and practical advice and wisdom. I was very encouraged after reading this, and would definitely recommend it to all my fellow boy moms.

[Melissa Oliver · Rating 2 out of 5]

Super simple concepts. Some not great applications of social science research. I didn’t learn anything I didn’t already know. I think this might be good for moms with kids age 5 and under who are feeling anxious about raising boys.

[Jessica Bonham · Rating 5 out of 5]

So encouraging and realistic with lots of great ideas/tips. There were some challenging areas that took me a minute to chew on and swallow… but I really enjoyed the whole book!

[Keith Stoddard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Audio-I sometimes have a hard time with self-help books. They make me feel overwhelmed and guilty. I did feel that a little when reading this but she does have some good ideas.

[Pebbles Kaydus · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly recommend this book. lots of scripture references and Biblical inspiration. she recommends books for your boys for you and your child to read. Along with Biblical testimonies.

[Allison Ivan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great straightforward and gospel centered advice on parenting boys (with plenty of humor and humility).

[Simona · Rating 4 out of 5]

This parenting book focuses on the emotional, relational, and developmental needs of boys in their early years, offering guidance on connection, communication, and healthy boundaries. It blends research with practical advice aimed at helping parents nurture confident and emotionally secure sons.

I found this book thoughtful and reassuring. It emphasized presence and understanding over perfection, which I appreciated. Some advice felt familiar, but the way it was framed made it feel validating rather than repetitive. Overall, it reinforced important reminders about empathy and intentional parenting