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On Character: Choices That Define a Life
AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
From the bestselling author of Team of Teams and My Share of the Task, reflections on character, and who we choose to be.
“Reputation is what men and women think of us;
character is what God and angels know of us.”
—Thomas Paine
How to measure a life? After a career of service, retired four-star general Stanley McChrystal had much to contemplate. He pondered his successes and failures, his beliefs and aspirations, and asked himself, Who am I, really? And more importantly, who have I become? When I die, how will I be measured?
In the end, McChrystal came to a conclusion as simple as it was the reality of who we are cannot be recorded in dates or accomplishments. It is found in our character—the most accurate, and last full measure, of who we choose to be.
On Character offers McChrystal’s blueprint for living with purpose and integrity, challenging us to examine not just our deeds but who we become through them. Drawing from a lifetime of experience, he distills profound insights on setting and meeting standards, aligning actions with beliefs, and offers practical advice on overcoming obstacles and pursuing self-improvement.
According to McChrystal, character is not a trait inherited at birth, nor does it automatically come from education, position, or experience. Character, instead, comes down to a succession of choices, most mundane, several momentous, that reveal the deep truth of our capacity for virtue.
In an era where understanding and upholding our ideals is more crucial than ever, On Character offers an inspiring roadmap for personal growth and integrity—a call to become our best selves, both as individuals and as Americans.
From the bestselling author of Team of Teams and My Share of the Task, reflections on character, and who we choose to be.
“Reputation is what men and women think of us;
character is what God and angels know of us.”
—Thomas Paine
How to measure a life? After a career of service, retired four-star general Stanley McChrystal had much to contemplate. He pondered his successes and failures, his beliefs and aspirations, and asked himself, Who am I, really? And more importantly, who have I become? When I die, how will I be measured?
In the end, McChrystal came to a conclusion as simple as it was the reality of who we are cannot be recorded in dates or accomplishments. It is found in our character—the most accurate, and last full measure, of who we choose to be.
On Character offers McChrystal’s blueprint for living with purpose and integrity, challenging us to examine not just our deeds but who we become through them. Drawing from a lifetime of experience, he distills profound insights on setting and meeting standards, aligning actions with beliefs, and offers practical advice on overcoming obstacles and pursuing self-improvement.
According to McChrystal, character is not a trait inherited at birth, nor does it automatically come from education, position, or experience. Character, instead, comes down to a succession of choices, most mundane, several momentous, that reveal the deep truth of our capacity for virtue.
In an era where understanding and upholding our ideals is more crucial than ever, On Character offers an inspiring roadmap for personal growth and integrity—a call to become our best selves, both as individuals and as Americans.
300 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 13, 2025
About the author
Stanley McChrystal
25 books411 followersStanley Allen McChrystal (born August 14, 1954) is a retired United States Army General. His last assignment was as Commander, International Security Assistance Force (ISAF) and Commander, U.S. Forces Afghanistan (USFOR-A). He previously served as Director, Joint Staff from August 2008 to June 2009 and as Commander, Joint Special Operations Command from 2003 to 2008, where he was credited with the death of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, leader of Al-Qaeda in Iraq, but also criticized for his alleged role in the cover-up of the Pat Tillman friendly fire incident. McChrystal was reportedly known for saying and thinking what other military leaders were afraid to; this was one of the reasons cited for his appointment to lead all forces in Afghanistan. He held the post from June 15, 2009, to June 23, 2010.
Following unflattering remarks about Vice President Joe Biden and other administration officials attributed to McChrystal and his aides in a Rolling Stone article, McChrystal was recalled to Washington, D.C., where President Barack Obama accepted his resignation as commander in Afghanistan. His command of the International Security Assistance Force in Afghanistan was immediately assumed by the deputy commander, British General Sir Nicholas "Nick" Parker, pending the confirmation of a replacement. Obama named General David Petraeus as McChrystal's replacement; Petraeus was confirmed by the Senate and officially assumed command on June 30. Days after being relieved of his duties in Afghanistan, McChrystal announced his retirement.
In 2010, after leaving the Army, McChrystal joined Yale University as a Jackson Institute for Global Affairs senior fellow. He teaches a course entitled "Leadership," a graduate-level seminar with some spots reserved for undergraduates. The course received 250 applications for 20 spots in 2011 and is being taught for a third time in 2013.
McChrystal co-founded and is a partner at the McChrystal Group LLC, an Alexandria, Virginia-based consulting firm.
McChrystal's memoir, My Share of the Task, published by Portfolio of the Penguin Group, was released on January 7, 2013. The autobiography had been scheduled to be released in November 2012, but was delayed due to security clearance approvals required from the Department of Defense.
McChrystal is the son of Mary Gardner Bright and Major General Herbert J. McChrystal, Jr., and was the fourth child in a family of five boys and a girl, all of whom would serve in the military or marry military spouses. His older brother, Colonel Scott McChrystal, is a retired Army chaplain, and is the endorsing agent for the Assemblies of God.
McChrystal married his wife Annie in April 1977, and the couple has one adult son, Sam.
Following unflattering remarks about Vice President Joe Biden and other administration officials attributed to McChrystal and his aides in a Rolling Stone article, McChrystal was recalled to Washington, D.C., where President Barack Obama accepted his resignation as commander in Afghanistan. His command of the International Security Assistance Force in Afghanistan was immediately assumed by the deputy commander, British General Sir Nicholas "Nick" Parker, pending the confirmation of a replacement. Obama named General David Petraeus as McChrystal's replacement; Petraeus was confirmed by the Senate and officially assumed command on June 30. Days after being relieved of his duties in Afghanistan, McChrystal announced his retirement.
In 2010, after leaving the Army, McChrystal joined Yale University as a Jackson Institute for Global Affairs senior fellow. He teaches a course entitled "Leadership," a graduate-level seminar with some spots reserved for undergraduates. The course received 250 applications for 20 spots in 2011 and is being taught for a third time in 2013.
McChrystal co-founded and is a partner at the McChrystal Group LLC, an Alexandria, Virginia-based consulting firm.
McChrystal's memoir, My Share of the Task, published by Portfolio of the Penguin Group, was released on January 7, 2013. The autobiography had been scheduled to be released in November 2012, but was delayed due to security clearance approvals required from the Department of Defense.
McChrystal is the son of Mary Gardner Bright and Major General Herbert J. McChrystal, Jr., and was the fourth child in a family of five boys and a girl, all of whom would serve in the military or marry military spouses. His older brother, Colonel Scott McChrystal, is a retired Army chaplain, and is the endorsing agent for the Assemblies of God.
McChrystal married his wife Annie in April 1977, and the couple has one adult son, Sam.
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 157 reviews
July 19, 2025
I love this book, and I think every American should read it. General McChrystal encourages readers to think critically about who they are, what they value, and why. His focus isn’t to get you to see the world the way he does. Instead, he provides perspective and encourages reflection. Give yourself the gift of picking up and reading this book. You’ll be better for it.
August 24, 2025
It is interesting to read the confusion in reviews by a few readers thus far. I knew from the beginning what Gen. McChrystal was aiming to achieve: This is his last will and testament of a life well served. It is his parting gift of lessons as if we were his grandchildren. For that, it achieves his purpose and I am grateful for his gift. Thank you, Gen. McChrystal.
June 17, 2025
The fifth book of McChrystal’s that I’ve read, I remain impressed by his integrity and (no pun intended) character. This wasn’t his best book. There isn’t a clear narrative arc to it; they’re vignettes on various topics loosely based on character, morality, and the important choices in life. Some are humorous. Some are serious. Many are loving.
The chapter I anticipated most was his thoughts on the U.S.’s exit from Afghanistan and the nearly immediate return of the Taliban to power. I think he chose his words almost too carefully, or perhaps it was edited or redacted to obscurity. Either way, it felt like he minced his words too finely.
Nonetheless, I have tremendous respect for General McChrystal. The world needs more leaders and thinkers like him.
The chapter I anticipated most was his thoughts on the U.S.’s exit from Afghanistan and the nearly immediate return of the Taliban to power. I think he chose his words almost too carefully, or perhaps it was edited or redacted to obscurity. Either way, it felt like he minced his words too finely.
Nonetheless, I have tremendous respect for General McChrystal. The world needs more leaders and thinkers like him.
May 28, 2025
On Character
This is a masterpiece. A clarion call to depth of character and graphic depiction of what that is and isn’t. I wish for our nation everyone would get a chance to read it and be transformed by it.
This is a masterpiece. A clarion call to depth of character and graphic depiction of what that is and isn’t. I wish for our nation everyone would get a chance to read it and be transformed by it.
June 18, 2025
Confusing. Not sure what the book is actually about. His thoughts are all over the place. The only thing I immediately realized is that this general truly likes himself. His ego is large.
January 26, 2026
I never probably would’ve picked this book and I didn’t like this book but it was for a work book club so I can’t tell them I didn’t like this book, but you all should know I didn’t like this book
January 7, 2026
4.5 stars rounded up. I’m cautiously optimistic about McChrystal books, as they’ve started to recycle content a bit too much for my taste, blending together in a Huel-like sludge that’s technically palatable but eminently mundane.
This book is not that, it’s actually quite good.
Maybe it’s because McChrystal is now into his 70s or he’s less focused on his consulting work, or perhaps I’m the one who’s changed since his last book, but the vibe is solid and reflective. Much more “Meditations” than machismo.
If you’re looking to do some of your own reflection, this book is a useful partner. I’m better for having read it and expect to read it again. Check it out.
This book is not that, it’s actually quite good.
Maybe it’s because McChrystal is now into his 70s or he’s less focused on his consulting work, or perhaps I’m the one who’s changed since his last book, but the vibe is solid and reflective. Much more “Meditations” than machismo.
If you’re looking to do some of your own reflection, this book is a useful partner. I’m better for having read it and expect to read it again. Check it out.
June 17, 2025
1.5 stars. okay grandpa
June 23, 2025
Very good inspiring book on character, leadership, and purpose of life.
August 17, 2025
Encouraged by its appearance on various summer reading lists, I thought this was worth a go. And it’s definitely a quick, summer-y read (if you’re in the mood for something introspective).
Where the book is at its best is where McChrystal talks about the role of discipline in building character - even though you get the strong sense that he’s pulling punches (running US special forces in the mid-2000s comes with the sort of disciplinarian mindset that you suspect may have lots of edges sanded off before it is written down). It is less persuasive in that it tries to be too accommodating of lots of different interpretations - which works as the author is now fifteen years retired, but which still doesn’t ring entirely true.
Where the book is at its best is where McChrystal talks about the role of discipline in building character - even though you get the strong sense that he’s pulling punches (running US special forces in the mid-2000s comes with the sort of disciplinarian mindset that you suspect may have lots of edges sanded off before it is written down). It is less persuasive in that it tries to be too accommodating of lots of different interpretations - which works as the author is now fifteen years retired, but which still doesn’t ring entirely true.
October 6, 2025
Despite being a short book, this felt like one of the 30-mile marches the general is so fond of referring to. I’d recommend David Brooks for more serious contemporary writing on character. Sincerity, while admirable - and this book is full of it - is not a substitute for argument.
There’s no new moral framework, exploration of psychology or even much philosophy. There’s certainly nothing that reaches the level of a thesis. While the Stoics make cameos, they don’t elucidate any novel arguments.
“I’ve done my duty, you should consider doing yours” is perhaps the most coherent message.
This is followed closely by the observations that we are imperfect and that in time we will be forgotten.
And so perhaps, in these reflections on our flawed and fleeting nature, this book embodies - however unintentionally - its very message.
There’s no new moral framework, exploration of psychology or even much philosophy. There’s certainly nothing that reaches the level of a thesis. While the Stoics make cameos, they don’t elucidate any novel arguments.
“I’ve done my duty, you should consider doing yours” is perhaps the most coherent message.
This is followed closely by the observations that we are imperfect and that in time we will be forgotten.
And so perhaps, in these reflections on our flawed and fleeting nature, this book embodies - however unintentionally - its very message.
July 5, 2025
In the vein of Marcus Aurelius, McChrystal reflects on events that shaped his values and beliefs. While no Meditations, the reflections are easy to read over breakfast to start the day.
August 1, 2026
He originally titled this book "What I Think About the Things I Think About." I much prefer that title because it's more accurate. Many musings here other than a coherent book on character. This book reminds me of Bill McRaven's books. Lots of great essays on being a soldier and getting old.
August 25, 2025
Easy read. Related anecdotes on character and leadership. Worthwhile.
March 14, 2026
I was very surprised by how much I enjoyed this book. From the title and military experience of the author, I wrongly assumed “On Character” would be a guide on habits and behaviors. Typically I steer away from “self-help” lifestyle guides; too often they are written by an individual with a clearly inflated ego. Instead, McChrystal wrote a thoughtful, humble, and inspirational exploration of life experiences. In the acknowledgements section, McChrystal mentions that his original working title was “What I Think About the Things I Think About,” and I do believe that, while maybe not as polished a title as “On Character,” it does accurately describe the essence of the book - reflections on the views he has developed over his life and career.
McChrystal’s writing was refreshing, particularly coming from an individual who held such an important position within U.S. leadership. His reflections were full of humility, respect, and wit.
McChrystal’s writing was refreshing, particularly coming from an individual who held such an important position within U.S. leadership. His reflections were full of humility, respect, and wit.
May 10, 2026
I really like this one!! It really got me reflecting on character, leadership and morals.
June 16, 2025
This was really good. I say that as someone fairly well read in the realm of biographies and even more well read in biographies of military leaders in particular. McChrystal did a good job. He also has done a GREAT job moving past the issues around the end of his time in the military in a healthy and productive way which is fantastic to hear. There wasn't a hint of bitterness I was able to detect and that in fact says a lot about his personal character.
March 16, 2026
This is a case where I probably would have liked the book better in print, because there were definitely some great insights here, including the premise of the book which was "Character = Convictions x Discipline" However, it was read by the author, and he has a super crotchety-sounding voice, and so some of his opinions sounded to me like a cranky old man ranting.
October 5, 2025
In On Character: Choices That Define a Life, General Stanley McChrystal shares stories and lessons from his time as a soldier, leader, and coach. The book feels like reading his personal journal, filled with moments of honesty and reflection. He looks back on what shaped his values and how they guided his choices. McChrystal says real character comes from the mix of conviction and discipline—the beliefs we hold and the effort we make to live by them.
He doesn’t focus on battles or war stories. Instead, he talks about what it means to live with purpose, raise a family, stay loyal to friends, and prepare for loss. Each short chapter gives readers a chance to stop and think about their own beliefs and choices. McChrystal admits he’s still learning, still improving, and still trying to live up to his own standards. He invites readers to do the same and to think deeply about what they believe and who they want to be.
Top Takeaways
- The book is a personal reflection on the meaning of character and values.
- McChrystal defines character as the product of conviction and discipline.
- Conviction means knowing what you believe and why it matters.
- Discipline means living those beliefs every day, even when it’s hard.
- Character shapes what we accept and what we refuse to tolerate.
- McChrystal shares lessons from his life as a soldier, leader, and mentor.
- He focuses on universal themes like family, friendship, loss, and purpose.
- The stories are short, honest, and written in a reflective first-person style.
- He reminds readers that character is built over time through choices.
- The book challenges readers to think about what they believe and who they want to be.
He doesn’t focus on battles or war stories. Instead, he talks about what it means to live with purpose, raise a family, stay loyal to friends, and prepare for loss. Each short chapter gives readers a chance to stop and think about their own beliefs and choices. McChrystal admits he’s still learning, still improving, and still trying to live up to his own standards. He invites readers to do the same and to think deeply about what they believe and who they want to be.
Top Takeaways
- The book is a personal reflection on the meaning of character and values.
- McChrystal defines character as the product of conviction and discipline.
- Conviction means knowing what you believe and why it matters.
- Discipline means living those beliefs every day, even when it’s hard.
- Character shapes what we accept and what we refuse to tolerate.
- McChrystal shares lessons from his life as a soldier, leader, and mentor.
- He focuses on universal themes like family, friendship, loss, and purpose.
- The stories are short, honest, and written in a reflective first-person style.
- He reminds readers that character is built over time through choices.
- The book challenges readers to think about what they believe and who they want to be.
June 8, 2025
I just finished reading Stan McChrystal’s new book #oncharacter.
What an extraordinarily thought provoking and deeply inspiring book it is. And timely.
I was struck by many aspects of the book but in particular his provocation to make sure we think for ourselves. That we form opinions after careful consideration and independent analysis.
As you refine your reading list for this summer. I highly recommend adding this
What an extraordinarily thought provoking and deeply inspiring book it is. And timely.
I was struck by many aspects of the book but in particular his provocation to make sure we think for ourselves. That we form opinions after careful consideration and independent analysis.
As you refine your reading list for this summer. I highly recommend adding this
September 5, 2025
I was gifted this book through a leadership course and had high hopes. Overall I found it underwhelming. The central message—that character is the foundation of leadership and must be cultivated through discipline and values—is important, but it isn’t especially new. Much of the book feels like a rehash of familiar leadership themes I’ve read in countless other works. While McChrystal’s military background gives him credibility, the anecdotes sometimes read more like Reader's Digest leadership vignettes than deep insights, and I often felt the stories ended abruptly, lacking cohesion with the section of the book.
I appreciate McChrystal’s sincerity and agree with his call for integrity in both personal and public life. However, I wish the book had gone deeper into fresh examples or provided more actionable frameworks. As it stands, it’s fine if you’re new to leadership reading, but not essential if you’ve explored the topic before.
I appreciate McChrystal’s sincerity and agree with his call for integrity in both personal and public life. However, I wish the book had gone deeper into fresh examples or provided more actionable frameworks. As it stands, it’s fine if you’re new to leadership reading, but not essential if you’ve explored the topic before.
June 27, 2025
Did not bother to finish this one. I’ve truly loved all his other books, but this is just a collection of an old man’s semi-philosophical ramblings on a variety of topics. The only constant theme is how much bigger his ego has gotten in retirement. Don’t bother with this one.
February 18, 2026
Great book of short chapters containing life lessons and thoughts on leadership and developing character. I wish more leaders would put out similar books in the twilight of their careers to pass along lessons learned.
July 26, 2025
Eh. Don’t waste your time.
May 12, 2026
I do not understand what the ruckus is about this book. I found it to be generic and a bit fluffy.
August 6, 2026
I am not really a fan of self-help books, at least not in the sense that I read them because I need them. I have never picked up a self-help book simply because I was going through a difficult period and needed motivation to keep going. Somehow, my journey into reading those kind of books took a different path.
When I first began reading seriously during the COVID period, I read across virtually every genre without paying much attention to labels. I had just completed my bachelor's degree, and since then into and throughout my NYSC year, I found myself reading extensively. Looking back, I realise that I had already read quite a number of self-help books before I even knew that "self-help" was considered a genre. More importantly, I was reading them at a time when I had not yet encountered any major difficulties in life.
Ironically, it was only later, when life became more demanding, that I discovered how valuable those books had been. Together with the Word of God (the Scriptures!), they had unknowingly equipped me with examples of men and women who had faced struggles similar to mine and eventually overcame them. Their experiences became a source of perspective whenever I encountered my own challenges. Of course, there are moments when everything seems insufficient. Those moments still exist, but thankfully they are rare. So, in many ways, I read self-help books before I understood what the category even meant.
I still read them today, though for different reasons. First, they serve as reminders. Most of the lessons are things I already know but occasionally need to hear again. Second, they are easy to read on autopilot. There are periods when I am deeply immersed in a difficult novel, a demanding mathematics text, or simply going through a stale season of reading where nothing particularly excites me. During such times, I often pick up a self-help book from wherever I left off. I much prefer doing that to scrolling endlessly through social media, watching strangers present carefully curated versions of life - people showing us how they "wake up" in the morning after they have already woken up, cleaned the room, set up a camera, and then gone back to bed just to film the perfect morning routine.
There is another reason I think about this genre the way I do.
During my master's degree, especially while taking some of the more advanced courses in pure mathematics, there was a period when I genuinely doubted my ability to complete the degree. It was one of the most difficult periods of my academic life, but eventually I overcame it. A few weeks after graduating, and after receiving my PhD offer, I happened to come across a book on imposter syndrome. I picked it up purely out of curiosity. Only while reading did I realise that I had, in fact, experienced many of the symptoms the book described. The point here is that I did not read the book because I was suffering from imposter syndrome. By then I had already gone through it and overcome it. I read it simply to understand the phenomenon better and to prepare myself, should I ever encounter it again. Before beginning my PhD, I ended up reading two very good books on imposter syndrome for exactly that reason.
Perhaps this explains why I did not particularly enjoy this book. Or perhaps it is something else that I cannot quite put into words. The author is a retired four-star general in the U.S. Army and former Commander of the International Security Assistance Force in Afghanistan. The book is essentially a collection of lessons from his military career and his reflections on leadership and other important subjects. Perhaps it is not strictly a self-help book, but that is the category in which I naturally place it. I have previously read Admiral William H. McRaven's work and thoroughly enjoyed it. This one, however, did not resonate with me in the same way. I appreciate the reminders the author offers, and I appreciate what appears to be his honesty... if, indeed, it is complete honesty. Yet there is something about the writing that left me unconvinced. Everything feels almost too polished, too perfect to be entirely authentic. Perhaps it is because the narrative revolves so heavily around "I"... his decisions, his experiences, his leadership... that I found it difficult to connect with it. This is not a book I am likely to recommend, nor is it one I expect to reread. :(
Then again, I rarely reread self-help books. Once I have absorbed their central ideas, I would rather read another one and see how a different author approaches similar lessons. Unless a self-help book is truly exceptional, I see little reason to return to it.
Above all, fiction is different! I reread fiction because I honestly believe the greatest self-help books are often novels. Trust me, some works of fiction will teach you more about courage, perseverance, suffering, hope, and human nature than many books marketed as self-help. Read something as simple as "The Old Man and the Sea", and you may discover that Hemingway teaches, through one old fisherman, what countless self-help authors spend hundreds of pages trying to explain.
Selah!
When I first began reading seriously during the COVID period, I read across virtually every genre without paying much attention to labels. I had just completed my bachelor's degree, and since then into and throughout my NYSC year, I found myself reading extensively. Looking back, I realise that I had already read quite a number of self-help books before I even knew that "self-help" was considered a genre. More importantly, I was reading them at a time when I had not yet encountered any major difficulties in life.
Ironically, it was only later, when life became more demanding, that I discovered how valuable those books had been. Together with the Word of God (the Scriptures!), they had unknowingly equipped me with examples of men and women who had faced struggles similar to mine and eventually overcame them. Their experiences became a source of perspective whenever I encountered my own challenges. Of course, there are moments when everything seems insufficient. Those moments still exist, but thankfully they are rare. So, in many ways, I read self-help books before I understood what the category even meant.
I still read them today, though for different reasons. First, they serve as reminders. Most of the lessons are things I already know but occasionally need to hear again. Second, they are easy to read on autopilot. There are periods when I am deeply immersed in a difficult novel, a demanding mathematics text, or simply going through a stale season of reading where nothing particularly excites me. During such times, I often pick up a self-help book from wherever I left off. I much prefer doing that to scrolling endlessly through social media, watching strangers present carefully curated versions of life - people showing us how they "wake up" in the morning after they have already woken up, cleaned the room, set up a camera, and then gone back to bed just to film the perfect morning routine.
There is another reason I think about this genre the way I do.
During my master's degree, especially while taking some of the more advanced courses in pure mathematics, there was a period when I genuinely doubted my ability to complete the degree. It was one of the most difficult periods of my academic life, but eventually I overcame it. A few weeks after graduating, and after receiving my PhD offer, I happened to come across a book on imposter syndrome. I picked it up purely out of curiosity. Only while reading did I realise that I had, in fact, experienced many of the symptoms the book described. The point here is that I did not read the book because I was suffering from imposter syndrome. By then I had already gone through it and overcome it. I read it simply to understand the phenomenon better and to prepare myself, should I ever encounter it again. Before beginning my PhD, I ended up reading two very good books on imposter syndrome for exactly that reason.
Perhaps this explains why I did not particularly enjoy this book. Or perhaps it is something else that I cannot quite put into words. The author is a retired four-star general in the U.S. Army and former Commander of the International Security Assistance Force in Afghanistan. The book is essentially a collection of lessons from his military career and his reflections on leadership and other important subjects. Perhaps it is not strictly a self-help book, but that is the category in which I naturally place it. I have previously read Admiral William H. McRaven's work and thoroughly enjoyed it. This one, however, did not resonate with me in the same way. I appreciate the reminders the author offers, and I appreciate what appears to be his honesty... if, indeed, it is complete honesty. Yet there is something about the writing that left me unconvinced. Everything feels almost too polished, too perfect to be entirely authentic. Perhaps it is because the narrative revolves so heavily around "I"... his decisions, his experiences, his leadership... that I found it difficult to connect with it. This is not a book I am likely to recommend, nor is it one I expect to reread. :(
Then again, I rarely reread self-help books. Once I have absorbed their central ideas, I would rather read another one and see how a different author approaches similar lessons. Unless a self-help book is truly exceptional, I see little reason to return to it.
Above all, fiction is different! I reread fiction because I honestly believe the greatest self-help books are often novels. Trust me, some works of fiction will teach you more about courage, perseverance, suffering, hope, and human nature than many books marketed as self-help. Read something as simple as "The Old Man and the Sea", and you may discover that Hemingway teaches, through one old fisherman, what countless self-help authors spend hundreds of pages trying to explain.
Selah!
June 13, 2025
Although this is only the second review of his books that I've shared on goodreads, I've actually read four of General Stanley McChrystal's works. His "Team of Teams" is a favorite of mine. And I really enjoyed "Leaders" - although I thought his "Risk: A User's Guide" dragged a little at times.
This latest (and final, according to his Acknowledgments) work falls somewhere in between these other books. I don't think it was quite as good as "Team of Teams." But it definitely is my second favorite of his works.
It's certainly his most personal. To help you understand why, I'll share the jacket description:
"How do we measure a life?
After a distinguished career, retired four-star general Stanley McChrystal faced this question head-on. He reflected on his successes and failures, wrestling with the essential question: Who am I, really? And more important: how will I be measured when I'm gone?
In the end, McChrystal's conclusion was both simple and profound: our true measure isn't found in dates or awards; it lies in our character—the ultimate testament of who we choose to be.
'On Character' draws from McChrystal’s rich experience to explore the discipline required to live up to our beliefs. Through gripping tales of triumph and defeat, he distills powerful insights that challenge us to examine not just our accomplishments but who we become through them.
According to McChrystal, character isn't something inherited or bestowed by education or status. Instead, it emerges from a series of choices - some mundane, others monumental - that reveal our capacity for virtue. It's about living up to our beliefs as individuals, citizens, and fellow Americans, grounded in our convictions and the discipline we summon to uphold them. McChrystal challenges us to reflect on how we can embody our principles in every aspect of our lives, shaping not only our own character but also the fabric of our society."
As you can see from this description, it's a highly reflective work that forces the reader to examine their own character and overall life. To keep score, if you will, of how closely we actually live a life of conviction, discipline, and character as compared to how we could. As he notes near the end of the work:
“In the end, living is the point. Yet it is not when or where we live, but how we live. The score reflects a game’s outcome, but the manner of play defines its quality. The character we reflect summarizes our lives as no other metric can. Until the end, I will judge that my greatest challenge lies in closing the gap between the character I display and what I was capable of. We often hope players will ‘leave it all on the field,’ and our pursuit of character should do nothing less.” [p. 282]
Not exactly a beach read, right?
Still, I highly recommend everyone not only read this deeply personal work, but that they take the time to self-reflect on McChrystal's points. I know I did.
I'll end this review with a few more gems from the book. Even if you don't read the entire work, I think you'll enjoy these powerful excerpts:
“Few concepts are as powerful or as fraught with danger as the idea of They. When we generalize, hyperbolize, and leverage the emotional commitment we’ve created with such binaries, we carry huge responsibilities for what we’ve sown. It may be that life is an inevitable game of us versus them, but we have some control over who we cast for each side.” [p. 24]
“Politics in America are broken. Whether you are conservative, liberal, or something in-between, the current construct doesn’t work. If your car or plumbing don’t function correctly, you fix them. It’s time to fix our politics.” [p. 88]
“Books help us consider stories, including our own life story, as more than a single page we’re on at that moment. We live with the consequences of our actions in the chapters ahead.” [p. 102]
“…great athletes – and most successful people in any endeavor – understand how few things in life are obtained without effort commensurate with their values. Observers might…say, ‘I could never do that.’ Of course they could. They just have chosen not to.” [p. 113]
“I am convinced that few truly great achievements are reached by individuals with an impressive work-life balance, and the price of greatness is, in a word, great.” [p. 120]
“Reputation is what men and women think of us; character is what God and angels know of us.” – Thomas Paine [p. 167]
“…the siren’s call of self-interest is seductive and finds no shortage of willing suitors.” [p. 210]
“I don’t try to be all I once was but also don’t accept being less than I can be.” [p. 265]
“But do think about death. Often. More specifically, about my life thus far and what I can and should do between now and the moment I pass. I hope I’ve been a good man, but I know I haven’t been the person I could have been. And for my remaining time, I’d like to do better.” [p. 277]
This latest (and final, according to his Acknowledgments) work falls somewhere in between these other books. I don't think it was quite as good as "Team of Teams." But it definitely is my second favorite of his works.
It's certainly his most personal. To help you understand why, I'll share the jacket description:
"How do we measure a life?
After a distinguished career, retired four-star general Stanley McChrystal faced this question head-on. He reflected on his successes and failures, wrestling with the essential question: Who am I, really? And more important: how will I be measured when I'm gone?
In the end, McChrystal's conclusion was both simple and profound: our true measure isn't found in dates or awards; it lies in our character—the ultimate testament of who we choose to be.
'On Character' draws from McChrystal’s rich experience to explore the discipline required to live up to our beliefs. Through gripping tales of triumph and defeat, he distills powerful insights that challenge us to examine not just our accomplishments but who we become through them.
According to McChrystal, character isn't something inherited or bestowed by education or status. Instead, it emerges from a series of choices - some mundane, others monumental - that reveal our capacity for virtue. It's about living up to our beliefs as individuals, citizens, and fellow Americans, grounded in our convictions and the discipline we summon to uphold them. McChrystal challenges us to reflect on how we can embody our principles in every aspect of our lives, shaping not only our own character but also the fabric of our society."
As you can see from this description, it's a highly reflective work that forces the reader to examine their own character and overall life. To keep score, if you will, of how closely we actually live a life of conviction, discipline, and character as compared to how we could. As he notes near the end of the work:
“In the end, living is the point. Yet it is not when or where we live, but how we live. The score reflects a game’s outcome, but the manner of play defines its quality. The character we reflect summarizes our lives as no other metric can. Until the end, I will judge that my greatest challenge lies in closing the gap between the character I display and what I was capable of. We often hope players will ‘leave it all on the field,’ and our pursuit of character should do nothing less.” [p. 282]
Not exactly a beach read, right?
Still, I highly recommend everyone not only read this deeply personal work, but that they take the time to self-reflect on McChrystal's points. I know I did.
I'll end this review with a few more gems from the book. Even if you don't read the entire work, I think you'll enjoy these powerful excerpts:
“Few concepts are as powerful or as fraught with danger as the idea of They. When we generalize, hyperbolize, and leverage the emotional commitment we’ve created with such binaries, we carry huge responsibilities for what we’ve sown. It may be that life is an inevitable game of us versus them, but we have some control over who we cast for each side.” [p. 24]
“Politics in America are broken. Whether you are conservative, liberal, or something in-between, the current construct doesn’t work. If your car or plumbing don’t function correctly, you fix them. It’s time to fix our politics.” [p. 88]
“Books help us consider stories, including our own life story, as more than a single page we’re on at that moment. We live with the consequences of our actions in the chapters ahead.” [p. 102]
“…great athletes – and most successful people in any endeavor – understand how few things in life are obtained without effort commensurate with their values. Observers might…say, ‘I could never do that.’ Of course they could. They just have chosen not to.” [p. 113]
“I am convinced that few truly great achievements are reached by individuals with an impressive work-life balance, and the price of greatness is, in a word, great.” [p. 120]
“Reputation is what men and women think of us; character is what God and angels know of us.” – Thomas Paine [p. 167]
“…the siren’s call of self-interest is seductive and finds no shortage of willing suitors.” [p. 210]
“I don’t try to be all I once was but also don’t accept being less than I can be.” [p. 265]
“But do think about death. Often. More specifically, about my life thus far and what I can and should do between now and the moment I pass. I hope I’ve been a good man, but I know I haven’t been the person I could have been. And for my remaining time, I’d like to do better.” [p. 277]
August 21, 2025
A book for all reasons from a man for all seasons.
General McChrystal starts his book with his dedication: “With admiration to all those who live a life of character. And with encouragement to all of us who fall short but continue to try.” Immediately following is René Descartes’s famous quote: “I think, therefore I am.” It turns out I went to the same high school (and the same college) as the General. I believe that when I was there, and correct or not, one of the Christian Brothers mentioned that the “Cogito, ergo sum” expression could also be read, “As I think, therefore I am.” It is on this basis, and whether or not McChrystal meant it this way or not, that I very much enjoyed his book. In support of my theory, I note that not only was McChrystal’s working title for his book “What I Think About the Things I Think About,” but the photograph on the back cover of the book shows him deep in thought.
I would define character simply as steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code. McChrystal defines character as a choice. “It is built upon convictions, or deeply held beliefs, that we embrace and the discipline we muster to live up to them.” He also believes that “despite its deeply human nature, it is curiously mathematical: Character [the resulting product] = Convictions x Discipline.” Conviction he defines as “what we believe, and how we enforce those beliefs, form the foundation of our character.” Discipline he defines as “our ability to follow through on our stated beliefs provides the sinew to connect our convictions to the character they are meant to uphold.” In this sense, he defines character as “The essential structure of our lives is what we are willing to tolerate—and what we are not.” With this in mind, McChrystal develops 22 chapters based on Convictions, 18 on Discipline, and the final 28 on Character, with two more added for Epilogue and Acknowledgments. Two of my favorite chapters are back-to-back: the last chapter in Convictions and the first one on Discipline: “Fixing Politics: What you don’t fix will kill you,” and “A Call to Think: The most critical discipline is to think for ourselves.”
In most chapters, McChrystal begins by describing a situation, usually military, from his life. He then reflects upon the general concepts and issues involved. Finally, he returns to the situation and offers pithy, quotable advice based upon the concepts developed and illustrated. Understandably, he gives several examples where he weaves in what he learned at West Point: viz, The Cadet Honor Code: “A cadet will not lie, cheat, steal, or … [tolerate those who do].” And a portion of the Cadet Prayer: “…Make us choose the harder right than the easier wrong, and never to be content with a half truth when the whole can be won.”
Remarkable is that throughout the book, the author strongly recommends persistence in attempting to do good, even though failure occasionally happens to all of us, and admits to it himself in sometimes humorous situations. Humility is a character trait he wears very well.
All in all, and “thinking” about it, I found McChrystal’s book to be a fascinating discourse on his book’s weighty title: “On Character: Choices That Define a Life.” Highly and enthusiastically recommended!
Of possible interest on the subject of character: George Washington's Liberty Key: Mount Vernon's Bastille Key – the Mystery and Magic of Its Body, Mind, and Soul, a best-seller at Mount Vernon. “Character is Key for Liberty!” And, with an eye to ethics: Strategic Advantage: How to Win in War, Business, and Life
General McChrystal starts his book with his dedication: “With admiration to all those who live a life of character. And with encouragement to all of us who fall short but continue to try.” Immediately following is René Descartes’s famous quote: “I think, therefore I am.” It turns out I went to the same high school (and the same college) as the General. I believe that when I was there, and correct or not, one of the Christian Brothers mentioned that the “Cogito, ergo sum” expression could also be read, “As I think, therefore I am.” It is on this basis, and whether or not McChrystal meant it this way or not, that I very much enjoyed his book. In support of my theory, I note that not only was McChrystal’s working title for his book “What I Think About the Things I Think About,” but the photograph on the back cover of the book shows him deep in thought.
I would define character simply as steadfast adherence to a strict moral or ethical code. McChrystal defines character as a choice. “It is built upon convictions, or deeply held beliefs, that we embrace and the discipline we muster to live up to them.” He also believes that “despite its deeply human nature, it is curiously mathematical: Character [the resulting product] = Convictions x Discipline.” Conviction he defines as “what we believe, and how we enforce those beliefs, form the foundation of our character.” Discipline he defines as “our ability to follow through on our stated beliefs provides the sinew to connect our convictions to the character they are meant to uphold.” In this sense, he defines character as “The essential structure of our lives is what we are willing to tolerate—and what we are not.” With this in mind, McChrystal develops 22 chapters based on Convictions, 18 on Discipline, and the final 28 on Character, with two more added for Epilogue and Acknowledgments. Two of my favorite chapters are back-to-back: the last chapter in Convictions and the first one on Discipline: “Fixing Politics: What you don’t fix will kill you,” and “A Call to Think: The most critical discipline is to think for ourselves.”
In most chapters, McChrystal begins by describing a situation, usually military, from his life. He then reflects upon the general concepts and issues involved. Finally, he returns to the situation and offers pithy, quotable advice based upon the concepts developed and illustrated. Understandably, he gives several examples where he weaves in what he learned at West Point: viz, The Cadet Honor Code: “A cadet will not lie, cheat, steal, or … [tolerate those who do].” And a portion of the Cadet Prayer: “…Make us choose the harder right than the easier wrong, and never to be content with a half truth when the whole can be won.”
Remarkable is that throughout the book, the author strongly recommends persistence in attempting to do good, even though failure occasionally happens to all of us, and admits to it himself in sometimes humorous situations. Humility is a character trait he wears very well.
All in all, and “thinking” about it, I found McChrystal’s book to be a fascinating discourse on his book’s weighty title: “On Character: Choices That Define a Life.” Highly and enthusiastically recommended!
Of possible interest on the subject of character: George Washington's Liberty Key: Mount Vernon's Bastille Key – the Mystery and Magic of Its Body, Mind, and Soul, a best-seller at Mount Vernon. “Character is Key for Liberty!” And, with an eye to ethics: Strategic Advantage: How to Win in War, Business, and Life
July 27, 2025
Stan McChrystal is an American hero.
“Heroism, in my view, is not merely a spasmodic response to a single situation,” says the former US Army four-star General. “It is the result of measured actions over time that curatively constitute a level of behavior that sets a person apart from, and above, what we usually suspect.”
McChrystal meets his own high standard.
He is the author of a new book titled “On Character: Choices That Define a Life,” which started simply enough as a series of 800-1,000 word essays McCrystal had written over a period of time. The book’s working title was initially “What I Think About the Things I Think About,” and his agent, editor, and publisher didn’t think much of that title.
More importantly, though, they saw that a single theme was woven through virtually all the passages — and that theme was character. They encouraged him to explore that more deeply, and he did. So throughout the book, McCrystal details the components of a tight mathematical equation that he formulated: Character = Convictions x Discipline.
Each chapter essentially asks the reader a question each of us must ponder and answer for ourselves. This book illustrates McChrystal’s answers, and here are a few of my favorite gems from the book:
“It is found in our character — the most accurate, and last full measure, of who we choose to be.”
“Life, I’ve learned, is mostly about who we decide to be. There are variables we don’t control, such as physical traits we inherit and many of the circumstances surrounding us. But what and whom we choose to believe in, and how those beliefs shape our character, is up to us.”
“At this stage in my life, I am thankful for having as few regrets as I do. But the number isn’t zero. I certainly regret the instances when I felt the organization let me down, but I can live with those. Sometimes, I even indulge in self-pity. But the moments I truly regret are the ones when I believe I could have stood stronger for someone who depended on me or when I let the organization fail a teammate. That really haunts me and drives me to do better next time.”
“I try to remember that rational, well-intentioned people can reach very different conclusions on knotty issues. I admit that my own views reflect life’s journey, and I could just as easily have arrived at very different opinions were my circumstances different.”
“In the end, much of this is a matter of accepting that life is an arc, not an ever-ascending slope we climb to all we ever dreamed. I don’t try to be all I once was but also don’t accept being less than I can be. Do I miss seeing them and waiting when the plane lands? Not really. But do I miss being someone people want and need in the room? Sometimes, I do.”
I think it’s important to note that in 2010, General McCrystal was the leader of the allied forces in Afghanistan. However, after a Rolling Stone article was published in which some members of his staff made unflattering remarks about the Commander-in-Chief, President Obama accepted McChrystal’s resignation. The video clip link below comes from the first public interview McChrystal gave after being fired. The pain, disappointment, embarrassment, and a hint of anger are evident.
Please watch it. After you do you’ll understand why I started out by calling Stan McChrystal a hero. Well, he is that and more. He is a man of conviction, discipline, and indeed, character.
https://youtu.be/OA0yXWAAais
“Heroism, in my view, is not merely a spasmodic response to a single situation,” says the former US Army four-star General. “It is the result of measured actions over time that curatively constitute a level of behavior that sets a person apart from, and above, what we usually suspect.”
McChrystal meets his own high standard.
He is the author of a new book titled “On Character: Choices That Define a Life,” which started simply enough as a series of 800-1,000 word essays McCrystal had written over a period of time. The book’s working title was initially “What I Think About the Things I Think About,” and his agent, editor, and publisher didn’t think much of that title.
More importantly, though, they saw that a single theme was woven through virtually all the passages — and that theme was character. They encouraged him to explore that more deeply, and he did. So throughout the book, McCrystal details the components of a tight mathematical equation that he formulated: Character = Convictions x Discipline.
Each chapter essentially asks the reader a question each of us must ponder and answer for ourselves. This book illustrates McChrystal’s answers, and here are a few of my favorite gems from the book:
“It is found in our character — the most accurate, and last full measure, of who we choose to be.”
“Life, I’ve learned, is mostly about who we decide to be. There are variables we don’t control, such as physical traits we inherit and many of the circumstances surrounding us. But what and whom we choose to believe in, and how those beliefs shape our character, is up to us.”
“At this stage in my life, I am thankful for having as few regrets as I do. But the number isn’t zero. I certainly regret the instances when I felt the organization let me down, but I can live with those. Sometimes, I even indulge in self-pity. But the moments I truly regret are the ones when I believe I could have stood stronger for someone who depended on me or when I let the organization fail a teammate. That really haunts me and drives me to do better next time.”
“I try to remember that rational, well-intentioned people can reach very different conclusions on knotty issues. I admit that my own views reflect life’s journey, and I could just as easily have arrived at very different opinions were my circumstances different.”
“In the end, much of this is a matter of accepting that life is an arc, not an ever-ascending slope we climb to all we ever dreamed. I don’t try to be all I once was but also don’t accept being less than I can be. Do I miss seeing them and waiting when the plane lands? Not really. But do I miss being someone people want and need in the room? Sometimes, I do.”
I think it’s important to note that in 2010, General McCrystal was the leader of the allied forces in Afghanistan. However, after a Rolling Stone article was published in which some members of his staff made unflattering remarks about the Commander-in-Chief, President Obama accepted McChrystal’s resignation. The video clip link below comes from the first public interview McChrystal gave after being fired. The pain, disappointment, embarrassment, and a hint of anger are evident.
Please watch it. After you do you’ll understand why I started out by calling Stan McChrystal a hero. Well, he is that and more. He is a man of conviction, discipline, and indeed, character.
https://youtu.be/OA0yXWAAais
September 1, 2026
On Character
Gen. Stanley McChrystal Ret.
“On Character” was worth the read and is
likely valuable for both newer soldiers and those who are far into their careers. Reads like Gen. McChrystal’s stream of consciousness and there are absolutely good lessons of humility, determination, and leadership that can be gleaned. I like the guy’s mindset.
—
p119. An obsessive level of effort can(not) exist without cost.
p114. “…the norm in most cases demands you smile when it’s raining and smile broadly when hail is pummeling you… if I had a nickel for every time a shivering Ranger, paratrooper limping away from a jump, or tank mechanic gripping cold tools in freezing weather told me, “I love this shit, sir,” I’d be a rich man. As it is, I consider myself wealthy from just the bond those whispered words conveyed.
We all get to choose how to react to the situation we’re in, the obstacles we face, the disappointment that befall us. We can whine, but I believe we’d be better off shutting up and embracing the suck.
The common denominator in earning… Seem to be approaching the entire challenge having decided from the start that they might get injured or flunk out, that it would be incredibly hard, but voluntarily quitting just wasn’t an option.
Not giving yourself an out is a great way to stick with something you know is ultimately good for you.
—
Leading-It involves treating a vision, setting and enforcing standards, and committing to the welfare and development of others. Sometimes many others. You must will yourself to be a better, more courageous, more generous, and more person than you’d otherwise be. This begins with thinking more about the mission you serve, and the people you lead than about yourself.
Additionally, don’t depend on popularity or gratitude.
—
Theoretical operation with no constraints. Then layering reality back in.
If the time taken has no relationship to the quality of the outcome, simply taking longer improves nothing. Moving rapidly often provides energy and opens up other possibilities. Sometimes, having it done quickly, is having it done well.
make us to choose the harder right instead of these wrong, and never to be content with a half truth when the whole can be won.
—
p228. on patriotism. The challenge is to hold the seemingly competing beliefs that as Americans, we can be exceptional, but other groups or nationalities can be as well.”
if we believe character is essential to a person’s value, then doesn’t true patriotism demand that each of us pursue the best character that we can achieve? conversely, can someone be simultaneously truly patriotic and a poor character? I don’t believe they can.
—
On heroes: Benedict Arnold and Achilles both served important purposes and times of need. But neither in the fullness of time represents the individuals we seek as role models for our children.
—
Civic Responsibility. we cannot simply admire the accomplishments and sacrifices of those before us. These men and women were great, but they are gone. And now it is only us. The responsibility to perform so many often, thankless deeds, large and small from voting to defending to preserving our most secret values is ours and ours alone.
—
Life continues. And if each of us lives by our convictions, I believe it will be better for us having lived.
Gen. Stanley McChrystal Ret.
“On Character” was worth the read and is
likely valuable for both newer soldiers and those who are far into their careers. Reads like Gen. McChrystal’s stream of consciousness and there are absolutely good lessons of humility, determination, and leadership that can be gleaned. I like the guy’s mindset.
—
p119. An obsessive level of effort can(not) exist without cost.
p114. “…the norm in most cases demands you smile when it’s raining and smile broadly when hail is pummeling you… if I had a nickel for every time a shivering Ranger, paratrooper limping away from a jump, or tank mechanic gripping cold tools in freezing weather told me, “I love this shit, sir,” I’d be a rich man. As it is, I consider myself wealthy from just the bond those whispered words conveyed.
We all get to choose how to react to the situation we’re in, the obstacles we face, the disappointment that befall us. We can whine, but I believe we’d be better off shutting up and embracing the suck.
The common denominator in earning… Seem to be approaching the entire challenge having decided from the start that they might get injured or flunk out, that it would be incredibly hard, but voluntarily quitting just wasn’t an option.
Not giving yourself an out is a great way to stick with something you know is ultimately good for you.
—
Leading-It involves treating a vision, setting and enforcing standards, and committing to the welfare and development of others. Sometimes many others. You must will yourself to be a better, more courageous, more generous, and more person than you’d otherwise be. This begins with thinking more about the mission you serve, and the people you lead than about yourself.
Additionally, don’t depend on popularity or gratitude.
—
Theoretical operation with no constraints. Then layering reality back in.
If the time taken has no relationship to the quality of the outcome, simply taking longer improves nothing. Moving rapidly often provides energy and opens up other possibilities. Sometimes, having it done quickly, is having it done well.
make us to choose the harder right instead of these wrong, and never to be content with a half truth when the whole can be won.
—
p228. on patriotism. The challenge is to hold the seemingly competing beliefs that as Americans, we can be exceptional, but other groups or nationalities can be as well.”
if we believe character is essential to a person’s value, then doesn’t true patriotism demand that each of us pursue the best character that we can achieve? conversely, can someone be simultaneously truly patriotic and a poor character? I don’t believe they can.
—
On heroes: Benedict Arnold and Achilles both served important purposes and times of need. But neither in the fullness of time represents the individuals we seek as role models for our children.
—
Civic Responsibility. we cannot simply admire the accomplishments and sacrifices of those before us. These men and women were great, but they are gone. And now it is only us. The responsibility to perform so many often, thankless deeds, large and small from voting to defending to preserving our most secret values is ours and ours alone.
—
Life continues. And if each of us lives by our convictions, I believe it will be better for us having lived.
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