Omg what did I just read? The trauma/angst porn in this gives unhinged Wattpad energy but like for old people. Don’t let the Jolly, rom com-esque cover fool you.
Heavy spoilers ahead, but bear with me cause this is gonna take a little bit of set up so you can understand the insane levels of fucked up this all is.
So the FMC is Enya. She’s a youngish widow in her early fifties. Her late husband passed about three years ago. She’s at a strange stage in life. On one hand, she’s too young to just stop living for herself altogether but also she’s already had a fulfilling relationship with her deceased husband Johnathon. Understandably, she struggles to move on. Like she still sees the man and has full length conversations with him, discussing ongoing struggles with him like he’s still around. The woman is riddled with anxiety and is so avoidant of conflict, it’s quite painful to watch.
She has an adult son, Aiden (the villain and shitbag of the story imo). He’s some kind of surgeon/healthcare professional. I honestly barely remember now because the other aspects of his personality completely overshadow whatever merits he may have, you’ll see. He’s been in a relationship with Holly essentially forever. Holly is the daughter of Enya’s BFF/neighbor Jenny. Enya secretly worries about this couple, like she worries about everything. She thinks they’ve fallen into a relationship more out of pattern then actual desire/true partnership since they’re all the other has ever really known. They’ve never really dated other people. Holly is an influencer and is kind of serious about her job, she earnestly loves Aiden and wants to build a life with him. She talks about wanting kids and although Enya loves her and can tell she genuinely loves her son too, but is also kind of dismissive of Holly, her aspirations, and her desire to build a family with her son. She thinks they’re too young and Holly is too unserious because of her choice of career (not because Holly truly is, but because Enya is just plain old and doesn’t actually understand the nuance of what social media centered career building actually entails).
Anyways, this whole story kicks off when Enya needs to drop Aiden off at the airport. He’s going to be away for a three week conference in Rome to learn about some advanced robotic knee arthroscopy. While sitting in her car going though her daily episode of panic, with a shot of extra travel anxiety for her nasty, golden boy son, another driver hits her. This is Dominic (the MMC), who is dropping a purse off at the airport. They exchange details and Enya has the lovebug, which shocks her because she’s has experienced this like ever.
She can’t stop thinking about the stranger and her sister encourages her to go for it if she’s got the feels. She’s unsure because she knows nothing about the man and she’s still talking aloud to Johnathon. But her sister is all you come off as an ice queen, what’s the worst that could happen. Well hey flirt over the phone and Dominic goes I’m married full disclosure. It’s not working out, as a matter of fact, I just got a new apartment today to start the decoupling process. Enya tells him that’s a likely story, take a hike.
So life goes on and Aiden is about to return. He wants Enya to come grab him and hasn’t even told Holly when his flight is coming in. Enya is worried because that’s what she does lol, and Aiden ends up dropping a bomb. He wants to get married and the date is set! Not to Holly, his partner of several years but some random woman he met on the flight to Rome, Iris. They hit it off so well, she changed her trip and spent the last few weeks in Rome with him. So this exemplary specimen of man only needed a few hours to days apart from his long term gf to start getting his rocks off with another. I guess Enya’s constant anxiety did start to make sense around this point.
So to be clear this man does not give a single flying fuck about how his actions affect anyone. Not Holly, not his mom, not his mom’s relationships with her BFF/ex’s mother. No one. He’s insistent that he’s in love and is crestfallen at the prospect anyone might think otherwise given the dubious, rapid timeline of this relationship. Admittedly he wasn’t even unhappy in his relationship with Holly before he left, he just didn’t know what he was missing till he met Iris! It’s really his selfishness that fueled my disgust for Aiden’s character and skepticism of Enya. She is so afraid to give him the cold hard truth and avoids confrontation, it was giving doormat. But odd at the same time because she wasn’t a doormat for a love interest but her son. It had me wondering if her marriage was really as rosy as she made it seemed or if she went with her husband’s flow.
And let me tell you this man needed a good verbal beating (maybe even physical beating), because guess what? Holly is pregnant with Aiden’s kid. She planned to tell him on the day he returned but he told her cheated and they were over instead. This man child continues his reign of terrorism and withholds this information from his fiancée for MONTHS. Like he doesn’t even reveal his until literal weeks before the wedding. Even asks his mom if he could maybe just tell her over a call or text 💀. I genuinely had to check if I was reading a comedy/parody at this point. Because the idea that a fully grown man who works as a physician and deals with death/suffering all the time could be so DAFT just exploded by brains a bit.
Anyways, we’ve strayed from the plot a bit, Dominic renters the story because turns out he’s Iris’s dad/ Aiden’s future FIL. We also meet Trish, his wife/future ex. And of course careful Enya, won’t pursue him now because that would throw Aiden’s life in disarray. Notice how he didn’t give her that consideration? Also as if he hasn’t already thrown his stable personal life to the wind?
So the two relationships are kind of explored in parallel. Aiden and Iris’s world-wind affair which is such a far cry from stable loving partnership that Enya slowly built with his father Johnathon and this intense connection she feels with Dominic but won’t explore because it may burn her world down further.
Her son continues to be a shitbag and she has to implore him to grow up. He literally states, that he doesn’t want his baby with Holly, so he continues to avoid having to tell Iris anything because he knows their relationship might not stand that test. In his true manipulative nature, he gives Iris his whole monologue about how much he loves her and then burns her world down when he tells her that Holly is pregnant and he’s kept it from her. Everything is OK though, because it turns out Iris has a big heart and ends up telling Holly and Aiden that there is a path forward with all three of them.
Enya also gets to know Dominic’s ex-wife, Trish throughout the wedding planning process. It feels a little manipulative as well because she keeps the fact that she’s romantically interested in Dominic from all of them throughout this. But truly, they’re the boring triangle in all of this.
In the end, Aiden and Iris marry. Holly has her baby and Aiden leaves Iris with Enya while she delivers. The two of them bond during this time and she essentially just accepts the situation because what’s she gonna do really? Aiden falls in love with his baby at first sight despite months of denying wanting to be a father to Holly’s baby and saying the most vile things. He now admits that he loves both Iris and Holly but differently. Something clicks for Enya and she’s like oh that’s what Dominic was saying! He loves Trish but isn’t IN love with her.
Side note. After the birth, Iris asks what they has as if she contributed anything to this joint project? Like babe you’re the OW who destabilized this poor baby’s life before the second trimester, STFU. 😑 honestly felt both Holly and Iris were good women who deserved better than Aiden but I digress. Also the fact that Enya continues to call Aiden a good, loyal kid after all of this just made me burst out laughing? Are we talking about the same person?
There’s an epilogue where we found out Iris is pregnant. Dominic and Enya get together officially. Their romance really takes backseat to her sons’s fuckery even though they’re the main couple. The last scene is her seeing a smiling Johnathon in the distance and he’s happy for her.
I probably missed a lot in between but I’m tired. I would say 2.75 stars overall. I think someone else mentioned this book is the definition of 3 stars and I agree. The writing is pretty good and I can appreciate the complexity of what the author tried to convey. If you enjoy angst, this is for you. I personally couldn’t identify with, disliked, or was flat out disgusted by most of the characters so I found myself disengaged with the story. I also feel ambivalent about the take home message, because to me it felt like the author was saying if you’re unhappy, screw your anxiety, be selfish in love, burn it all down to ashes, and try to build a house on top of what remains. Aiden really nuked her relationships after she already lost her husband for a fling of three weeks and she just smiled through it all because she was too afraid to confront his selfishness. I do applaud the author for teaching me you can also be doormat to your children and stunt their maturity out of fear of conflict. But I suppose it’s ok because everyone wants to feel special in their own story no matter the circumstances their love was built on. 🤷♀️