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The Curious Case of The Prawnographic Nibbles: The Making of Prendergast of The Yard Chapter Five
Heather Prendergast’s final exams are just around the corner ad then - God and Aunt Elizabeth willing - she will be but a hop, a slip and a jump from fulfilling her lifeheld ambition of joining the Metropolitan Police. But a pear-shaped spanner is tossed into the works when Merton police college is put into special measures and a new principal is appointed.
Prendergast’s prospects look bleak until, out of the blue, Taylor Swift comes galloping to her rescue
Well, needless to say, this being Heather Prendergast, mayhem ensues until she emerges smelling of roses and champagne ready to resume her journey to her ultimate goal as Prendergast of The Yard
Prendergast’s prospects look bleak until, out of the blue, Taylor Swift comes galloping to her rescue
Well, needless to say, this being Heather Prendergast, mayhem ensues until she emerges smelling of roses and champagne ready to resume her journey to her ultimate goal as Prendergast of The Yard
39 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 23, 2024
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Displaying 1 of 1 review
June 6, 2025
‘It was a day to forget that Heather Prendergast would remember till her dying day, if not longer.’
After a swanabout to the Cannes Film Festival with her celebrity aunt, which mostly involved shopping—and absolutely no revising—Heather Prendergast is ill-prepared for her exams at Merton Police College. Failure is not an option if she is to achieve her lifeheld dream of becoming ‘Prendergast of the Yard’. But why study? She can just learn her detecting from her illustrated Sherlock Holmes almanac.
In her absence, someone has given Principal Pratley a video of his wife bonking Professor Morrison, and there has been an incident, resulting in hospitalisation as well as disgrace.
On the way in to assembly, snotty classmate Daisy Miller (‘bleachblonde hair, beachball breasts, a bowlingball bum… an incongruous rhinoplastic nose and teapot ears’) insults Heather’s Cannes designer-wear by spilling her cherrycola on her.
Then the new principal insults her designer coat and sends her to help Debbie Smith in the campus kitchen. And thus begins a hilarious caper.
This contribution to the Prendergast of the Yard canon features Thompson’s signature brilliant wordplay. He invents words at will (equilibriumise her blood sugar levels, disacidify her discombobulation, uncarrier-bagging, whistlestop cleanathon, unscrewtopped, chimpanzoo, phlebotomised) and turns metaphors on their heads in clever ways.
His characters are clowns: Prendergast, who takes herself sooo seriously and is always crazily dressed for any occasion; filthy rich and famous Aunt Elizabeth, who is always ready with some zany folk wisdom. Their madcap capers are reminiscent of Wodehouse or Tom Sharpe.
Yet there is always a serious plot, and a satisfying conclusion where the baddies get what’s coming to them.
Another hilarious Prendergast of the Yard novella.
After a swanabout to the Cannes Film Festival with her celebrity aunt, which mostly involved shopping—and absolutely no revising—Heather Prendergast is ill-prepared for her exams at Merton Police College. Failure is not an option if she is to achieve her lifeheld dream of becoming ‘Prendergast of the Yard’. But why study? She can just learn her detecting from her illustrated Sherlock Holmes almanac.
In her absence, someone has given Principal Pratley a video of his wife bonking Professor Morrison, and there has been an incident, resulting in hospitalisation as well as disgrace.
On the way in to assembly, snotty classmate Daisy Miller (‘bleachblonde hair, beachball breasts, a bowlingball bum… an incongruous rhinoplastic nose and teapot ears’) insults Heather’s Cannes designer-wear by spilling her cherrycola on her.
Then the new principal insults her designer coat and sends her to help Debbie Smith in the campus kitchen. And thus begins a hilarious caper.
This contribution to the Prendergast of the Yard canon features Thompson’s signature brilliant wordplay. He invents words at will (equilibriumise her blood sugar levels, disacidify her discombobulation, uncarrier-bagging, whistlestop cleanathon, unscrewtopped, chimpanzoo, phlebotomised) and turns metaphors on their heads in clever ways.
His characters are clowns: Prendergast, who takes herself sooo seriously and is always crazily dressed for any occasion; filthy rich and famous Aunt Elizabeth, who is always ready with some zany folk wisdom. Their madcap capers are reminiscent of Wodehouse or Tom Sharpe.
Yet there is always a serious plot, and a satisfying conclusion where the baddies get what’s coming to them.
Another hilarious Prendergast of the Yard novella.
Displaying 1 of 1 review