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Where We End and Begin
"i had the nightmare again. the one where i can feel the weight, smell the perfume, feel the cold porcelain..."
Elliot Finch is a quiet boy. He loves the beach and pancakes at the local diner and drawing in his journal. A journal that housed his most private, most intimate thoughts and feelings. A journal that was never meant to be seen by anyone other than himself. But someone did see it, and it ruined his life.
Everything in Elliot's life is now marked as "before" or "after" The Party, and he vowed to never put his thoughts down on paper again, that way no one can use them against him.
But when Ms. Sue, the high school guidance counselor, tells him to journaling might help him process his feelings, he begins writing again. Slowly, the journal entries peel back the layers, revealing what happened to him the night of The Party, and maybe, maybe help him move on.
Elliot Finch is a quiet boy. He loves the beach and pancakes at the local diner and drawing in his journal. A journal that housed his most private, most intimate thoughts and feelings. A journal that was never meant to be seen by anyone other than himself. But someone did see it, and it ruined his life.
Everything in Elliot's life is now marked as "before" or "after" The Party, and he vowed to never put his thoughts down on paper again, that way no one can use them against him.
But when Ms. Sue, the high school guidance counselor, tells him to journaling might help him process his feelings, he begins writing again. Slowly, the journal entries peel back the layers, revealing what happened to him the night of The Party, and maybe, maybe help him move on.
- GenresContemporary
57 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 24, 2024
1 person is currently reading
33 people want to read
About the author
Sab Ay
3 books41 followersSab Ay is a passionate storyteller and advocate for mental health. Growing up neurodivergent, Sab found solace in the world of books and writing. This evolved into crafting narratives that explore the profound journeys of self-discovery, resilience, and the complexities of adolescence.
When Sab isn't writing stories she hopes make the reader cry, she can be found reading obscure middle grade and young adult books not typically seen online, drinking obscenely sweet iced coffees, or listening to Taylor Swift and drawing her characters.
When Sab isn't writing stories she hopes make the reader cry, she can be found reading obscure middle grade and young adult books not typically seen online, drinking obscenely sweet iced coffees, or listening to Taylor Swift and drawing her characters.
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
February 9, 2025
holyyyy crapp this novelette is something ELSE 😭😭
really, this is everything to me. i've been following sab for a long long time on instagram, and ive loved elliot long before finally reading his book properly and it just made me love him even more 😭🫶 he is MY SON 😭😭
he's so soft and confused and sab handled and delivered his trauma throughout his own journal pages so well ☹️☹️☹️
reading his thoughts and opinions felt so raw to me, especially when he'd write out topics he wouldn't speak about out loud. i, myself, am not very familiar with male pov books, so this (and the all the things i cannot say, also by sab, ARC i recieved and am reading) is kind of new to me, and it was so easy to get through. the writing isn't too heavy, nor too light. elliot finch is the epitome of how teenage boys should be im my head. he's very soft, sensitive, and caring. he's so lovely in every way im gonna sob. his relationship with nina was the sweetest thing, and his reunion, as i'd like to say, with marty made me tear up. the little glimpse we got of his relationship with his mom genuinely made me lose it. he's my baby ☹️☹️☹️
sab did so good with p*ris' chatacter. i genuinely wanted to rip my guts out everytime her name was mentioned on a page. she is literally the definition of those high school mean girl bullies who do their thing quietly and let everyone believe they're so kind and sweet (gags). as terrible and utterly disgusting she is, she was written wonderfully in a way that made it all seem so real.
i read this in one sitting (about an hour and a half) on the bus ride during a school trip (my friend was next to me and i kept gasping the entire time) and you better believe me when i tell you i was NUMB when i got off the bus 😭 literally my friends had to drag me in and around until i got distracted and forgot about the book for a while 😭🙏
the epilogue was the perfect wrap up for elliots story. even though i was satisfied with the ending, the epilogue that took place years after the incident just shows how much elliot has grown. it gives us a glimpse of his current life, his relationships, while also showing that even though he's learning to cope with his trauma, he's found much healthier ways to do so with the right support from his therapists, friends, and family, all which i find so freaking sweet and gentle ☹️☹️🫶🫶
it's very late at night, but i had to put all my thoughts down. i might come back and add more later but for now im gonna post this and say READ THIS BOOK. it's short, lovely, and it deliveres a story so raw and real while handling the topics with care. make sure to read the trigger warnings, they're mentioned in the first pages!! and there's also a playlist, so tune in to that too!!
i hope whoever decides to read this book after reading my review loves it as much as i do 🫶 mwahh 🫶
really, this is everything to me. i've been following sab for a long long time on instagram, and ive loved elliot long before finally reading his book properly and it just made me love him even more 😭🫶 he is MY SON 😭😭
he's so soft and confused and sab handled and delivered his trauma throughout his own journal pages so well ☹️☹️☹️
reading his thoughts and opinions felt so raw to me, especially when he'd write out topics he wouldn't speak about out loud. i, myself, am not very familiar with male pov books, so this (and the all the things i cannot say, also by sab, ARC i recieved and am reading) is kind of new to me, and it was so easy to get through. the writing isn't too heavy, nor too light. elliot finch is the epitome of how teenage boys should be im my head. he's very soft, sensitive, and caring. he's so lovely in every way im gonna sob. his relationship with nina was the sweetest thing, and his reunion, as i'd like to say, with marty made me tear up. the little glimpse we got of his relationship with his mom genuinely made me lose it. he's my baby ☹️☹️☹️
sab did so good with p*ris' chatacter. i genuinely wanted to rip my guts out everytime her name was mentioned on a page. she is literally the definition of those high school mean girl bullies who do their thing quietly and let everyone believe they're so kind and sweet (gags). as terrible and utterly disgusting she is, she was written wonderfully in a way that made it all seem so real.
i read this in one sitting (about an hour and a half) on the bus ride during a school trip (my friend was next to me and i kept gasping the entire time) and you better believe me when i tell you i was NUMB when i got off the bus 😭 literally my friends had to drag me in and around until i got distracted and forgot about the book for a while 😭🙏
the epilogue was the perfect wrap up for elliots story. even though i was satisfied with the ending, the epilogue that took place years after the incident just shows how much elliot has grown. it gives us a glimpse of his current life, his relationships, while also showing that even though he's learning to cope with his trauma, he's found much healthier ways to do so with the right support from his therapists, friends, and family, all which i find so freaking sweet and gentle ☹️☹️🫶🫶
it's very late at night, but i had to put all my thoughts down. i might come back and add more later but for now im gonna post this and say READ THIS BOOK. it's short, lovely, and it deliveres a story so raw and real while handling the topics with care. make sure to read the trigger warnings, they're mentioned in the first pages!! and there's also a playlist, so tune in to that too!!
i hope whoever decides to read this book after reading my review loves it as much as i do 🫶 mwahh 🫶
August 12, 2025
elliot finch💔
June 21, 2025
oh my goodness.
elliot finch is the love of my life. gosh, i e-arc'ed "all the things i cannot say" by sab back in January and that's when i had the pleasure of meeting elliot for the first time. (if you havent read attics , go do it now!!!) and i immediately fell in love with him from the beginning, and this book did not disappoint.
usually, i would have said that the writing style wasn't for me because i dont typically enjoy the telling instead of showing writing styles but with the fact elliot's book was written in journal entries, the book was so interesting, and it made me forget i was even reading a tell instead of show writing style. it actually felt like i was talking to elliot himself.
and gosh, i loved the message. yes, what happened to elliot happens to girls way more and it seems like the only time these stories are noticed is when it happens to a girl. but the truth is, guys can be victims of this too and its heartbreaking. i just wanted to give him a hug with each passing page. this book is definitely worth anyone's time.
elliot finch is the love of my life. gosh, i e-arc'ed "all the things i cannot say" by sab back in January and that's when i had the pleasure of meeting elliot for the first time. (if you havent read attics , go do it now!!!) and i immediately fell in love with him from the beginning, and this book did not disappoint.
usually, i would have said that the writing style wasn't for me because i dont typically enjoy the telling instead of showing writing styles but with the fact elliot's book was written in journal entries, the book was so interesting, and it made me forget i was even reading a tell instead of show writing style. it actually felt like i was talking to elliot himself.
and gosh, i loved the message. yes, what happened to elliot happens to girls way more and it seems like the only time these stories are noticed is when it happens to a girl. but the truth is, guys can be victims of this too and its heartbreaking. i just wanted to give him a hug with each passing page. this book is definitely worth anyone's time.
May 5, 2025
Took my heart out and ripped it apart 😀 (5/5 tho DEF recommend if you want a good cry🙏)
October 29, 2025
read this in one sitting.
if you, fellow reader, are looking for an absolute tear jerker with similar vibes to “the perks of being a wallflower”? You have picked up the absolutely correct book. I cried. Six times.
I adored getting to know Elliot through his journal entries, and Nina was a wonderful character as well 🙂↕️
Check the trigger warnings before you read, but if it’s something you can handle? Absolutely worth a read.
FOLLOW UP: 10/29/25
if you listen to the audiobook the party scene will make you cry 4884489339 times harder just as a heads up. I’m suing for emotional damages.
if you, fellow reader, are looking for an absolute tear jerker with similar vibes to “the perks of being a wallflower”? You have picked up the absolutely correct book. I cried. Six times.
I adored getting to know Elliot through his journal entries, and Nina was a wonderful character as well 🙂↕️
Check the trigger warnings before you read, but if it’s something you can handle? Absolutely worth a read.
FOLLOW UP: 10/29/25
if you listen to the audiobook the party scene will make you cry 4884489339 times harder just as a heads up. I’m suing for emotional damages.
January 18, 2025
Oh my goodness.
I read this in one sitting, I want to cry. This book is beautiful.
Firstly Sab handled the topic very well, and it’s very well written.
This book touched me on two points, the relation to my own experiences and the topic of sa towards men. So many people don’t think that’s even possible, that the woman is always the victim and it can’t happen to men. I’m glad to see a book that highlights this, I think it should be talked about far more.
This book was hard to read, but also enlightening. It made me feel less alone in a way in regard to my own experience. I hope more and more people read this book.
I read this in one sitting, I want to cry. This book is beautiful.
Firstly Sab handled the topic very well, and it’s very well written.
This book touched me on two points, the relation to my own experiences and the topic of sa towards men. So many people don’t think that’s even possible, that the woman is always the victim and it can’t happen to men. I’m glad to see a book that highlights this, I think it should be talked about far more.
This book was hard to read, but also enlightening. It made me feel less alone in a way in regard to my own experience. I hope more and more people read this book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 23, 2025
I don't even know what to say about this novelette. The way that Sab wrote this in a diary POV from our main character, Elliot was so amazing and though throughout.
What can I say about Elliott. One of the best main characters I've read in a while, his characterisation and emotions throughout his own diary entries were so heartfelt and empowering, and his own self-worth especially after the party incident definitely made me cry on multiple occasions.
And I adored Sab's writing of a male POV dealing with SA, as it's something that not often dealt in YA fiction and I believe that Sab did a fantastic job of portraying the emotions of Elliot's SA here and it was so heart-breaking to hear him retell his story in his diary.
What can I say about Elliott. One of the best main characters I've read in a while, his characterisation and emotions throughout his own diary entries were so heartfelt and empowering, and his own self-worth especially after the party incident definitely made me cry on multiple occasions.
And I adored Sab's writing of a male POV dealing with SA, as it's something that not often dealt in YA fiction and I believe that Sab did a fantastic job of portraying the emotions of Elliot's SA here and it was so heart-breaking to hear him retell his story in his diary.
March 3, 2025
“where we end and begin” touches on heavy topics, including SA. because it’s young adult, it doesn’t go into graphic detail, but sab ay was still able to portray it in a way that impacted the reader.
while it was a short read, i thought it was an amazing story. i love elliot so much—he deserves so much more 🥺😭.
nina was an amazing best friend (and more 🥹).
paris—an awful character as she was—felt realistic in a terrifying way. she was literally insane and we. hate. her.
i was shocked with the stuff with marty, but i’m glad it all worked out in the end 👏.
i literally sobbed towards the end—elliot felt so ashamed and disgusted with himself, and i just 😭. it wasn’t his fault 😭.
elliot finch was such a sweet character, and i’ll never forget him 🥹.
please search up trigger warnings before you read this, but otherwise, i recommend!!
while it was a short read, i thought it was an amazing story. i love elliot so much—he deserves so much more 🥺😭.
nina was an amazing best friend (and more 🥹).
paris—an awful character as she was—felt realistic in a terrifying way. she was literally insane and we. hate. her.
i was shocked with the stuff with marty, but i’m glad it all worked out in the end 👏.
i literally sobbed towards the end—elliot felt so ashamed and disgusted with himself, and i just 😭. it wasn’t his fault 😭.
elliot finch was such a sweet character, and i’ll never forget him 🥹.
please search up trigger warnings before you read this, but otherwise, i recommend!!
January 14, 2025
This book is so cute and I love it . This book is also sad at points but it’s so good .
March 29, 2025
4.25⭐️
This book is one of the most heartbreaking books I have ever read. Elliot Finch is a tragic character and I just want to hug him :( he deserves the world.
This book is one of the most heartbreaking books I have ever read. Elliot Finch is a tragic character and I just want to hug him :( he deserves the world.
October 22, 2025
Read it all in one night, laughed, cried, cried looking back at a.t.t.i.c.s, came to love and hate the author even more
March 6, 2025
SAB ILY 🫶
December 28, 2024
Sab ily and your books 🥺🥺🥺 elliot finch is such a sweet character and i LOVE nina 💜💜💜 i love how we get elliot’s side story and i can’t wait for attics to release. i love how elliot represents issues that often aren’t acknowledged among boys. your writing makes me so happy 🥰🥰🥰 WRITE MOLLYS BOOK FASTER PLSSSS 🥺🥺🥺
July 16, 2025
well that was properly devastating.
December 13, 2025
it was okay. i liked the diary format but i wanted more ? not in the usual sense where i want more of the story because i love it so much, but this was just so short and jumpy and i understand elliot (bb) is going through a lot but i would have loved to read this as a novel. it felt like an underdeveloped version of tpobaw. not back tho!
December 25, 2025
Sabs writing is the best bro
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews