The Joy Reset: Six Ways Trauma Steals Happiness and How to Win it Back

by Marycatherine McDonald

A groundbreaking, accessible, and actionable guide to healing trauma through a reframing and adaptation of Positive Psychology, by author of Unbroken Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald.

Joy can feel complicated, especially to someone who is struggling. Against the very real darkness that life offers up, a chorus of “but do you have a gratitude journal?” or “have you tried yoga?” can feel isolating and dismissive. And yet, the research on resilience, joy, gratitude, hope, and posttraumatic growth proves unequivocally that these emotions are healing. When it comes to deploying that research and adapting it into actionable tools for people with a trauma history, psychology falls desperately short. To bridge this gap, Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald has reframed these concepts and created new interventions for anyone who struggles to feel at home with joy.

In The Joy Reset, Dr. McDonald helps readers identify six common barriers that prevent people from accessing joy – hypervigilance, emotional numbing, fear of loss, conditioning, guilt, and shame – and then redefines positive emotions as those tenacious, gritty, often tiny experiences that appear within the darkest moments and form the very foundation of psychological resilience. Rooted in the neurobiology that explains how and why trauma and suffering can impede our path to hope and joy, Dr. McDonald shares exercises that make joy and gratitude both bite-sized and accessible, inviting readers to welcome these emotions back in.
By emphasizing the very real ways that joy and hope show up even in our toughest moments, The Joy Reset empowers readers to find the light in the dark – no matter what.
 

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Audiobook, Personal Development

256 pages, Paperback

Published May 13, 2025

Reviews

[BiblioPeeks · Rating 5 out of 5]

For folks who have a history of trauma, feelings of hope and joy can sometimes trigger intense opposition in the form of what Mary Catherine McDonald calls "joy thieves". There are six of them and she explains each one, why they occur and how to overcome them.

•Hypervigilance
•Emotional Numbing
•Fear of Loss
•Conditioning
•Guilt
•Shame

The reasons behind why it can be hard to access joy make SOOOO much sense! THE JOY RESET is accessible and easy to understand. What may not be as easy, is putting the steps into practice. It does take some effort to retrain your thought processes and it can be entirely uncomfortable, but it CAN be DONE. I'm already finding more joy throughout my days in simple moments that I can stop and appreciate for what they are.

Mary Catherine also narrates the audiobook and does a wonderful job! There's a bit of a memoir aspect as well since she shares personal experiences from her private practice and things she learned along the way from her clients. It's great to hear that in her own voice and the examples she provides are entirely relatable.

I'd highly recommend THE JOY RESET to anyone who has a history of trauma and is looking to put joy back in their life!
____

Thank you Grand Central Publishing and Hachette Book Group for my gifted copy. All opinions are my own.

[Lori Johnson Warner · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not your usual self-help book. A gritty, dark path toward joy and hope - right up my alley. And the ideas are all good solid psychological practice backed by science. Excellent writing; she is a great storyteller.

[Nima Morgan · Rating 5 out of 5]

In this day and age, we could all use a renewed sense of joy, and if that comes from small, simple pleasures, then what a wonderful way to begin. This book is a guide to help you reset, with many helpful insights.

[Kate Cobb · Rating 4 out of 5]

”Joy does not have to be equal in size to pain in order to count, and joy does not have to counter or solve the pain - it can just sit right there beside it."

[Ashlie Miller · Rating 3 out of 5]

9/28

Thank you to Balance for this free copy in exchange for an honest review!

This book wasn’t for me particularly, but it was still interesting! I wanted more stories about the author’s experiences with her clients, but it’s mostly self-help with a sprinkle of experiences. Not to say this was bad by any means; y’all just know I’m not much of a self-help girly.

[Michelle Glogovac · Rating 5 out of 5]

In a time where joy can feel like it's hard to find or that we simply shouldn't be celebrating it, this book is the perfect read. Dr. McDonald brilliantly shares (again!) her personal story and the relatable stories of patients who are struggling with joy...the shame of it, the guilt of it, the definition of it and much more. The book touches on some very dark topics yet I found it to be filled with light because Dr. McDonald describes why we should all look for tiny joys and celebrate them, no matter what.

[Dawn Woodward · Rating 4 out of 5]

A solid 4.5. I began following MC on insta in January. Her "tiny little joy" posts gave me something to smile about on some pretty rough days and added to them on the better ones. The whole "tlj" idea was not at all new to me as a long time Buddhist, but it was a new twist on the practice that enabled me to incorporate it into my daily routine, and I definitely noticed a difference in my mindset as a result. So when her book was released in the spring, I entered the goodreads giveaway (and somehow WON). As is usual for me, it took me a while to actually crack it open, but somehow I did so at just the right moment. In many ways, this was the book I was expecting ... this is not rainbow and platitude "joy" she's talking about... this is gritty, sometimes unwanted and obnoxious, sometimes a lifeline kind of real joy (mixed in with some wonderfully colorful and well placed f bombs, etc). Many of these lessons and practices meshed well with my Buddhist studies and practices, but I very much enjoyed the deeper dive into the science and the different perspective. Something I did NOT expect was the use of classic literature and philosophy as a way to illustrate or dive deeper into the concepts ... oh the JOY of my little liberal arts educated heart!!!
Something else I didn't expect was the memoir/autobiographical parts of the book. MC isn't just a therapist and research scientist (and clearly a big reader), she's BEEN THERE (and sometimes is STILL there). Like deep down in the pit of despair THERE. Her willingness to share that and be vulnerable to her readers definitely gave her words more weight and authenticity.
While it likely not all of the "joy thieves" that appear in this book are something I (and likely most others) can see in themselves, I still found these chapters interesting (and maybe found myself trying to diagnose loved ones ... lol).
The book is also full of concrete practices and tips, some of which work for me (like daily tlj practice) and others that don't really, but that's fine ... the spirit of the book is definitely "take from this what speaks to you".
I definitely would recommend this book to just about anyone ... even if you think you don't have a difficult relationship with joy, or haven't experienced great trauma ... you will still very likely get something significant from this book. I know I thought I had myself pegged as a victim of a specific type of joy thief, but through reading the entire book, I saw myself to varying degrees in several others and THAT was where I really learned a lot. I can't think of a single person in my life who wouldn't benefit from reading it.

[Em · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with a digital ARC to read so that I could provide my opinion.

I went into "The Joy Reset" feeling hopeful—who doesn’t need more joy? Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald has insightful, valuable things to say, and I appreciated that she offers practical tools right from chapter one. As a busy reader, I know that early value matters.

For those who have experienced trauma in their lives, this is a valuable read. It offers excellent activities and some truly illuminating stories that can help guide healing and self-reflection.

That said, I struggled with the delivery. The heavy use of profanity early on felt distracting and unnecessary—it didn’t add to the message for me and made it harder to focus on the important content. The writing style often felt overly wordy, which buried some of the book’s best ideas. There are definite “Aha” moments throughout, especially in chapter 3, but I had to work to find them.

This book has real potential and offers meaningful help, but I wish it had been more concise and tightly edited. Still, I can see this resonating more strongly with readers who enjoy a casual, highly personal tone.

[Marianne Pestana · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Joy Reset is a powerful, compassionate guide rooted in scientific research and clinical experience. MaryCatherine McDonald, PhD, redefines joy and hope as essential, hard-earned tools for healing, not superficial fixes. Drawing on neuroscience and psychology, she introduces the six “joy thieves” that block our access to happiness and offers practical, evidence-based strategies to reclaim it. This isn’t about bypassing pain, it’s about building joy right in the middle of it. Honest, empowering, and deeply validating, this book is a lifeline for anyone who feels stuck in survival mode and is ready to reconnect with life.

[Reader · Rating 3 out of 5]

I began reading this book, thinking about all the ways I could practice feeling joy. Then I realized I didn’t hv the time to start doing any of those practices then I took a break from the book only to finish it later. I thought the author was really honest and trying to be truly herself in the book - I feel this is evident in the curse words. It was engaging enough but I found myself going in and out in my mind as I read this book. In the end I got one message that will stick with me “manage fear or you will become it”

[Jennifer Mullins · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Joy Reset by Marycatherine McDonald is a brilliant book that focuses on finding joy in the face of trauma. I love how the chapters are set up, explaining what seeks to rob us of joy, and practical exercises at the end to help restore joy. I also appreciate how MC shares her own personal experiences, which shows me that she's not only writing from a neuroscience perspective, but also from a place of understanding the journey that we're all on. I highly recommend this book.

[Kristen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I discovered Marycatharine McDonald on Instagram with her Tiny Little (Daily) Joy challenge. A clinical psychologist, McDonald's science is sound and I learned really interesting things about my own field from reading this (hello Default Mode Network). I loved that she included summaries of various clients (all details, naturally, blurred) all of whom suffered from trauma. This is really a 3.5 rating rounded up as I didn't really like the way the book ended. Felt abrupt.

[Marisol Serna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish I had the right words to describe this book and do it justice. Wow. I am such a huge MC fan and maybe I’m biased but damn. I’m sad I finished it. But time to find some joy.

[Cara · Rating 4 out of 5]

first half applied more to me personally, super helpful and actionable. fresh takes that made me feel very brought in / acknowledged and validated my beef with gratitude practices

[Victoria · Rating 5 out of 5]

A self help book with actual tools & inspiring stories! Thank you!

[Katie Brooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

Took me a while to get through this one, but there are a lot of really good nuggets. Joy is intentional and I am learning to find it again.

[Sam Albala · Rating 4 out of 5]

Guilt / shame / fear

[Sharon Bromberg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very easy to read, like she's talking to you. Gives great examples from her clients and her own life. Also includes practical notes on what to do.

[Debbie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had a hard time getting through this book but maybe my trauma was rejecting it. I thought it was fine.