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My Desire
Are You Ready to Play?
Aidan’s favourite game is hide and seek, while Holly’s is being chased.
Holly lives a lonely life having her childhood ripped away when she was taken from her parents at such a young age. She was taught to never answer back and take it like a little girl should.
Aidan might be possessive and controlling but he would burn the world for this girl. He will burn every demon that haunts her sleep even if it took him all eternity. He will chase her and catch her but she will be wrapped in his arms as she overcomes her troubled past.
Holly lives a lonely life having her childhood ripped away when she was taken from her parents at such a young age. She was taught to never answer back and take it like a little girl should.
Aidan might be possessive and controlling but he would burn the world for this girl. He will burn every demon that haunts her sleep even if it took him all eternity. He will chase her and catch her but she will be wrapped in his arms as she overcomes her troubled past.
- GenresDark
340 pages, Kindle Edition
Published April 6, 2025
17 people are currently reading
108 people want to read
About the author
Jess Cody
4 books56 followersJess is a Dark romance author from the heart of Liverpool. When she isn’t writing her spicy scenes or trauma-based characters, she’s curled up in bed reading her spicy or taboo books. In the day, she is a writer, and by night, she is just a normal human with an adult job.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews
March 12, 2025
Truama, revenge and obsession. What could go wrong? This was a quick read. Like a little refresher if you like darker themes. FMC goes through a healing journey and I always love that
March 11, 2025
Nothing bad ever came from a game of Hide and seek!! Or did it?? 😏
Title: My Desire
Author: Jess Cody
Release Date: April 30th 2025
A DARK Romance Standalone,
Debut Novel!!
Please check Trigger Warnings on Authors website! This is not a read for the light hearted!
I was lucky enough to accept an e-ARC of My Desire, in exchange for my honest Review.
Rating
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Spice
🌶🌶🌶🌶
Darkness
🔘🔘🔘🔘
Tropes
🖤Best Friends brother
🖤Age gap
🖤Forbidden love
🖤Forced Proximity
🖤Praise kink
🖤A lot of past trauma
🖤Adult Version of Hide and Seek
🖤Drug Addiction and Alcoholism
🖤Foster care/ Social Services
🖤Duel POV
My Review!
For me this read was something i would not of found myself reading and completing, However, I am glad I did!
I wanted to find out how she come out of this and how her life was effected.
For what this is ,it was a story that could be real for some people and I had to continue to get the full picture!. It will either turn you away or keep u reading! The choice is yours alone.
Yes this start is alarming, though it ends in a much better place. It doesn’t happen without challenge’s. it starts with the Prologue! A in-site into Hollys childhood!
You will expect there to be , Childabuse (graphic) ,Child Sexual Abuse (Graphic) Non-con / Dub-Con, CNC, trauma includes flashbacks. Addiction to drugs and Alcohol , even death! Abortion , hand necklaces and rough play.
This is a DARK read and you will be taken through a twisted emotional ride with feelings that some parts can or maybe hard to stomach!
Is it possible to feel like you wanna jump into a book and protect a character?
The childhood holly went through f*ck me! That girl has been through it rough!
And Adian! He tries to help her through this , but shes pushing him away without realising it. While he is possessive and controlling he is infatuated with her since they 1st meet. Though he has a soft side too! He is a Questionable cook also !
Ok well let me point out some things that stick the f*ck out !
- Holly’s child hood, details that will shock and enrage you!
- Holly in her apartment ,making some questionable Choices.
- An abandon home , with Screw driver and some eyeballs!
- The ghost house ! Let me say OUCH! And whats missing!
- Forest, knife and Blood for lube WTF!! IYKYK!!!!
**********Added extra*********
I want to thank Jess for the
acknowledgments at the end!
voicing she was in a dark place while writing this book , My Desire. With entering 2025 being able to Publish a debut novel it is a great way for her to come out the end stronger! Well done Jess. Im sure there will be more from this Author!
Title: My Desire
Author: Jess Cody
Release Date: April 30th 2025
A DARK Romance Standalone,
Debut Novel!!
Please check Trigger Warnings on Authors website! This is not a read for the light hearted!
I was lucky enough to accept an e-ARC of My Desire, in exchange for my honest Review.
Rating
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Spice
🌶🌶🌶🌶
Darkness
🔘🔘🔘🔘
Tropes
🖤Best Friends brother
🖤Age gap
🖤Forbidden love
🖤Forced Proximity
🖤Praise kink
🖤A lot of past trauma
🖤Adult Version of Hide and Seek
🖤Drug Addiction and Alcoholism
🖤Foster care/ Social Services
🖤Duel POV
My Review!
For me this read was something i would not of found myself reading and completing, However, I am glad I did!
I wanted to find out how she come out of this and how her life was effected.
For what this is ,it was a story that could be real for some people and I had to continue to get the full picture!. It will either turn you away or keep u reading! The choice is yours alone.
Yes this start is alarming, though it ends in a much better place. It doesn’t happen without challenge’s. it starts with the Prologue! A in-site into Hollys childhood!
You will expect there to be , Childabuse (graphic) ,Child Sexual Abuse (Graphic) Non-con / Dub-Con, CNC, trauma includes flashbacks. Addiction to drugs and Alcohol , even death! Abortion , hand necklaces and rough play.
This is a DARK read and you will be taken through a twisted emotional ride with feelings that some parts can or maybe hard to stomach!
Is it possible to feel like you wanna jump into a book and protect a character?
The childhood holly went through f*ck me! That girl has been through it rough!
And Adian! He tries to help her through this , but shes pushing him away without realising it. While he is possessive and controlling he is infatuated with her since they 1st meet. Though he has a soft side too! He is a Questionable cook also !
Ok well let me point out some things that stick the f*ck out !
- Holly’s child hood, details that will shock and enrage you!
- Holly in her apartment ,making some questionable Choices.
- An abandon home , with Screw driver and some eyeballs!
- The ghost house ! Let me say OUCH! And whats missing!
- Forest, knife and Blood for lube WTF!! IYKYK!!!!
**********Added extra*********
I want to thank Jess for the
acknowledgments at the end!
voicing she was in a dark place while writing this book , My Desire. With entering 2025 being able to Publish a debut novel it is a great way for her to come out the end stronger! Well done Jess. Im sure there will be more from this Author!
April 10, 2025
Holly had it rough growing up, and she lacked the emotional stability needed to form healthy attachments and emotions. This is brought up with some detail and helps to understand how she is. Aiden, though, is just dark and doesn't seem to have a reason why he acts the way he does aside from who he chooses to be around. Also, the location where this book takes place is a but confusing to me as it's not explicitly stated and tends to bounce between British and American English. Overall, though, the chemistry and emotions felt in this book had me in a hand necklace. It was dark topics and hard moments, and I grew to love these two messed up people. I do hope to get a story for Ava, with more Aiden and Holly, because I don't think they are done yet.
March 11, 2025
I want to thank Jess for providing me with a digital ARC to review.
While My Desire is only a short novel it deals with some VERY dark themes, so make sure you thoroughly read the content warnings: non-con, dub-con, CNC, Age gap, child (sexual) abuse, drug addiction, death, alcoholism, termination... the full list is at the beginning of the book, My Desire is a tough read and definitely not for everyone.
The characters in this have a dark & twisted relationship, Aidan is infatuated with Holly as soon as he meets her but kept his distance until she was 17, and he was 25, now I am unsure as to where My Desire is set, I would assume England so the relationship isn't classed as underage or illegal. However, it is completely understandable that some people may not feel comfortable reading about this kind of relationship. (This is mentioned in the content warnings along with numbers for UK helplines)
As a reader, my heart often broke for Holly. When you go through life being treated a certain way, you really do start to believe that is all you are good for, and my god, I FELT THAT.
It was gut-wrenching, especially the flashbacks to when she was younger.
Aidan is a difficult character, he is infatuated with Holly, and in his own way loves her, but he does withhold a lot, I think there is more to his back story that would explain Avas addiction (his sister and Holly's best friend) and why he has a lot of darkness in him, there were times where he would be downright cruel to Holly only to apologise minutes later. But then he would also be incredibly loving and willing to do anything for her.
There were two scenes that made me squeamish - one involving a screwdriver and eyeballs, and the other was Anal without Lube, I may or may not have actually shouted, "WHERE IS THE LUBE?!?"
By the end of the epilogue, Holly and Aidan seem to be in a better place than they both were throughout the novel, although Aidan does appear to be a bit gruff in general and easy to annoy They both appear to be on the same page in regard to their relationship. (Although I am disappointed that Holly gave in and went for Grey paint instead of Green)
To say that Jess was in a dark place when she wrote My Desire and it is her debut, it is a strong start and this must have been so cathartic when your head and emotions are giving you hell.
I am looking forward to seeing what else Jess has for readers in the future.
While My Desire is only a short novel it deals with some VERY dark themes, so make sure you thoroughly read the content warnings: non-con, dub-con, CNC, Age gap, child (sexual) abuse, drug addiction, death, alcoholism, termination... the full list is at the beginning of the book, My Desire is a tough read and definitely not for everyone.
The characters in this have a dark & twisted relationship, Aidan is infatuated with Holly as soon as he meets her but kept his distance until she was 17, and he was 25, now I am unsure as to where My Desire is set, I would assume England so the relationship isn't classed as underage or illegal. However, it is completely understandable that some people may not feel comfortable reading about this kind of relationship. (This is mentioned in the content warnings along with numbers for UK helplines)
As a reader, my heart often broke for Holly. When you go through life being treated a certain way, you really do start to believe that is all you are good for, and my god, I FELT THAT.
It was gut-wrenching, especially the flashbacks to when she was younger.
Aidan is a difficult character, he is infatuated with Holly, and in his own way loves her, but he does withhold a lot, I think there is more to his back story that would explain Avas addiction (his sister and Holly's best friend) and why he has a lot of darkness in him, there were times where he would be downright cruel to Holly only to apologise minutes later. But then he would also be incredibly loving and willing to do anything for her.
There were two scenes that made me squeamish - one involving a screwdriver and eyeballs, and the other was Anal without Lube, I may or may not have actually shouted, "WHERE IS THE LUBE?!?"
By the end of the epilogue, Holly and Aidan seem to be in a better place than they both were throughout the novel, although Aidan does appear to be a bit gruff in general and easy to annoy They both appear to be on the same page in regard to their relationship. (Although I am disappointed that Holly gave in and went for Grey paint instead of Green)
To say that Jess was in a dark place when she wrote My Desire and it is her debut, it is a strong start and this must have been so cathartic when your head and emotions are giving you hell.
I am looking forward to seeing what else Jess has for readers in the future.
March 19, 2025
My desire is a short but dark read.
It's the authors debut novel! What a way to start :) Well done!!
It focuses on the FMC Holly and our MMC Aidan! Holly is a poor young girl, who's parents are drug addicts who end up passing away, she is shipped to a home where she is abused, both physically and sexually, this takes us to where she is today, a 17 year old girl who is addicted to drugs, but her best friends brother who is worlds apart from her life, he sees this and wants to protect her as well as ruin her in other ways.
He tries to protect her by kidnapping her and making her go through withdrawal, but he has his own demons. He protects her and challenges her at the same time.
This is an emotional ride. Definitely be sure to read the tropes and triggers to see if this is something that you can handle.
Tropes include:
- Best friends brother
- age gap
- Forbidden love
- hide and seek
- abuse and trauma
Etc, leading onto triggers
- child abuse
- drug use
- CNC
- kidnapping
- abortion
And more.
Definitely would like some more of their story to find out what happens to them and her best friends wedding and story.
It's the authors debut novel! What a way to start :) Well done!!
It focuses on the FMC Holly and our MMC Aidan! Holly is a poor young girl, who's parents are drug addicts who end up passing away, she is shipped to a home where she is abused, both physically and sexually, this takes us to where she is today, a 17 year old girl who is addicted to drugs, but her best friends brother who is worlds apart from her life, he sees this and wants to protect her as well as ruin her in other ways.
He tries to protect her by kidnapping her and making her go through withdrawal, but he has his own demons. He protects her and challenges her at the same time.
This is an emotional ride. Definitely be sure to read the tropes and triggers to see if this is something that you can handle.
Tropes include:
- Best friends brother
- age gap
- Forbidden love
- hide and seek
- abuse and trauma
Etc, leading onto triggers
- child abuse
- drug use
- CNC
- kidnapping
- abortion
And more.
Definitely would like some more of their story to find out what happens to them and her best friends wedding and story.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 11, 2025
I absolutely loved this book.
I had the honour and opportunity to have an ARC for My desire and when I say I couldn’t put it down, I just couldn’t.
I was hooked on Holly and Aidan from the first chapter.
Holly past is so realistic and I related to elements of her childhood from loss etc.
Aidan, just wow. He is so protective and moody.
Holly and Aidan have a dark and twisted relationships but the dynamics of their connection really keeps you gripped and hooked.
This book does come with a list of trigger warnings so I would read them before starting to read this book.
Although the age gap thing seems to be a bother for some I do think Jess has put it in a way that’s realistic because I do feel there is so many age gap couples these days. And think of the older generations they have 10/11 year age gaps.
This book displays a lot of trauma around child abuse and sexual assault and how the FMC can overcome this with the help and support of the MMC.
Also, who doesn’t love a game of hide and seek. 😜
I had the honour and opportunity to have an ARC for My desire and when I say I couldn’t put it down, I just couldn’t.
I was hooked on Holly and Aidan from the first chapter.
Holly past is so realistic and I related to elements of her childhood from loss etc.
Aidan, just wow. He is so protective and moody.
Holly and Aidan have a dark and twisted relationships but the dynamics of their connection really keeps you gripped and hooked.
This book does come with a list of trigger warnings so I would read them before starting to read this book.
Although the age gap thing seems to be a bother for some I do think Jess has put it in a way that’s realistic because I do feel there is so many age gap couples these days. And think of the older generations they have 10/11 year age gaps.
This book displays a lot of trauma around child abuse and sexual assault and how the FMC can overcome this with the help and support of the MMC.
Also, who doesn’t love a game of hide and seek. 😜
May 1, 2025
Are You Ready to play?
Aidan’s favourite game is hide and seek , while holly’s is being chased.
Holly lives a lonely life having her childhood ripped away when she was taken from her parents at such a young age. She was taught to never answer back and take it like a little girl should.
Aidan might be possessive and controlling but he would burn the world for this girl. He will burn every demon that haunts her sleep even if it took him all eternity. He will chase her and catch her but she will be wrapped in his arms as she overcomes her troubled past.
Holly and Aiden. Holly had terrible childhood filled with trauma.
*check you triggers.
Aiden is Holly’s best friends bother. He will stop at nothing to have her and heal her past trauma.
I love the banter between these two and the love hate relationship they have. The spice in this book was 🤌🏽💋
There are so VERY dark themes in this book so please please please
READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
Aidan’s favourite game is hide and seek , while holly’s is being chased.
Holly lives a lonely life having her childhood ripped away when she was taken from her parents at such a young age. She was taught to never answer back and take it like a little girl should.
Aidan might be possessive and controlling but he would burn the world for this girl. He will burn every demon that haunts her sleep even if it took him all eternity. He will chase her and catch her but she will be wrapped in his arms as she overcomes her troubled past.
Holly and Aiden. Holly had terrible childhood filled with trauma.
*check you triggers.
Aiden is Holly’s best friends bother. He will stop at nothing to have her and heal her past trauma.
I love the banter between these two and the love hate relationship they have. The spice in this book was 🤌🏽💋
There are so VERY dark themes in this book so please please please
READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
April 1, 2025
*ARC*
I received this as an ARC, and while the story and plot line were good, i had constant whiplash from Aiden going from caring to punishing with no reason at the drop of a hat. In the span of one paragraph, it could go from "I love you" to "I hate you" with little to no reasoning. There was one scene where he f*cks her with a knife handle, completely at random, and i still cannot figure out why or what drove him to do so. Holly was a little shallow for me, but also a bit of whiplash, because she too, was "omg i love him" but in the same breath "i hate him". I wanted to love this so much, and i didnt hate it, it just fell a little short for me. Overall, if i could give 3.5⭐️ i would.
I received this as an ARC, and while the story and plot line were good, i had constant whiplash from Aiden going from caring to punishing with no reason at the drop of a hat. In the span of one paragraph, it could go from "I love you" to "I hate you" with little to no reasoning. There was one scene where he f*cks her with a knife handle, completely at random, and i still cannot figure out why or what drove him to do so. Holly was a little shallow for me, but also a bit of whiplash, because she too, was "omg i love him" but in the same breath "i hate him". I wanted to love this so much, and i didnt hate it, it just fell a little short for me. Overall, if i could give 3.5⭐️ i would.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 23, 2025
My Desire is Jess Cody’s Debut Novel and for a debut the author has done a great job in delivering a dark and exciting book, I mean who wouldn’t love and adult version of hide and seek!
Though I did enjoy this I will advise that you check the CW/TW before diving in, there is a certain troupe (age-gap) where the age of the FMC might be sensitive for some.
Overall this was a good debut and fun read, look forward to see what’s next from this new author
Though I did enjoy this I will advise that you check the CW/TW before diving in, there is a certain troupe (age-gap) where the age of the FMC might be sensitive for some.
Overall this was a good debut and fun read, look forward to see what’s next from this new author
April 3, 2025
I wanted to like this book I really did. But the writing was a bit chaotic and the storyline seemed to a little too fast.
Arc review.
Arc review.
March 24, 2025
I received an ARC of "My Desire" by Jess Cody, and I'm ready to share my thoughts. This book delivers exactly what it promises: a high-spice, intensely driven romance that captivates with its raw passion. I'm giving this book a solid 4 stars and a 4-spice rating. If you're looking for a plot-heavy narrative, this might not be your primary pick. However, what "My Desire" lacks in intricate plot, it more than makes up for in its exploration of intense desire and the slow, but steady, growth of its characters.
Holly's journey is particularly compelling. She enters the story with a deeply wounded past, having been stripped of a normal childhood and forced to endure harrowing experiences. The author skillfully portrays her emotional fragility and the gradual process of her healing. Despite the heavy themes and the explicit content, you can’t help but root for her.
Aidan, the possessive and controlling male lead, is a force of nature. His unwavering devotion to Holly, and his determination to eradicate the demons of her past, is both intense and consuming. While his methods are often questionable, his commitment to her well-being is undeniable.
The chemistry between Holly and Aidan is electric, driving the narrative forward with a palpable tension that keeps you turning the pages. The book leans heavily into its dark themes and explicit scenes, so be sure to check the trigger warnings.
Ultimately, "My Desire" is a story about overcoming trauma, finding solace in another, and the consuming nature of desire. While the plot may take a backseat to the steamy encounters, the character development, particularly Holly's, provides a satisfying arc. If you're a fan of dark romance with a heavy dose of spice and a touch of emotional depth, this book is worth diving into. Just be prepared for a wild ride!
Holly's journey is particularly compelling. She enters the story with a deeply wounded past, having been stripped of a normal childhood and forced to endure harrowing experiences. The author skillfully portrays her emotional fragility and the gradual process of her healing. Despite the heavy themes and the explicit content, you can’t help but root for her.
Aidan, the possessive and controlling male lead, is a force of nature. His unwavering devotion to Holly, and his determination to eradicate the demons of her past, is both intense and consuming. While his methods are often questionable, his commitment to her well-being is undeniable.
The chemistry between Holly and Aidan is electric, driving the narrative forward with a palpable tension that keeps you turning the pages. The book leans heavily into its dark themes and explicit scenes, so be sure to check the trigger warnings.
Ultimately, "My Desire" is a story about overcoming trauma, finding solace in another, and the consuming nature of desire. While the plot may take a backseat to the steamy encounters, the character development, particularly Holly's, provides a satisfying arc. If you're a fan of dark romance with a heavy dose of spice and a touch of emotional depth, this book is worth diving into. Just be prepared for a wild ride!
April 10, 2025
-ARC Review-
This story follows Holly’s horrific experience in life, being SA, physically and emotionally abused- being passed around from foster home to foster home after her parents passed. From a distance, her best friend’s older brother, Aiden, has always watched her. He’s always loved her but couldn’t act on his feelings until she was 18 years old. Aiden-stalker, kidnapper and the guy who loves a good game of hide & seek (the adult kind) Wants to help Holly but he only knows one way to do so. Go on this journey as Aiden try’s to heal Holly from her past and the now with her drug addiction and alcoholism, in his own screwed up and controlling way.
✨“Should I be scared?” She says her voice cracking. “Always, baby girl, you should fear me. I don’t do pleasant.” I say still leaning over and undoing her seat belt.✨
Tropes:
Age Gap
Best Friends Brother
Hide & Seek (Adult version)
Knife & Blood Play
Morally Grey MMC
Forbidden Love
A Lot of Past Trauma
Drug Addiction & Alcoholism
Bondage Play
Many said it was too much…But let’s be honest put all that aside real quick, Look at this book for what it is, A story that IS real life for so many children growing up in foster homes, abused and some even K!lled, This story is about how Holly survived and Aiden plays a huge role in that survival. I had to read this book twice, the second time around it was so much better. I kept reading because I had to know there was something better for Holly at the end of that tunnel, that her life wasn’t all bad and Jess Cody did not disappoint at all. This book will make or break you, that’s only up to you and how your mindset is going into this read. I enjoyed it. It was the kind of roller coaster I love, Emotional.
🖤My Desire is out now, available on KU and ca be purchased on Amazon 🖤
🚨CHECK TRIGGER WARNINGS🚨
This story follows Holly’s horrific experience in life, being SA, physically and emotionally abused- being passed around from foster home to foster home after her parents passed. From a distance, her best friend’s older brother, Aiden, has always watched her. He’s always loved her but couldn’t act on his feelings until she was 18 years old. Aiden-stalker, kidnapper and the guy who loves a good game of hide & seek (the adult kind) Wants to help Holly but he only knows one way to do so. Go on this journey as Aiden try’s to heal Holly from her past and the now with her drug addiction and alcoholism, in his own screwed up and controlling way.
✨“Should I be scared?” She says her voice cracking. “Always, baby girl, you should fear me. I don’t do pleasant.” I say still leaning over and undoing her seat belt.✨
Tropes:
Age Gap
Best Friends Brother
Hide & Seek (Adult version)
Knife & Blood Play
Morally Grey MMC
Forbidden Love
A Lot of Past Trauma
Drug Addiction & Alcoholism
Bondage Play
Many said it was too much…But let’s be honest put all that aside real quick, Look at this book for what it is, A story that IS real life for so many children growing up in foster homes, abused and some even K!lled, This story is about how Holly survived and Aiden plays a huge role in that survival. I had to read this book twice, the second time around it was so much better. I kept reading because I had to know there was something better for Holly at the end of that tunnel, that her life wasn’t all bad and Jess Cody did not disappoint at all. This book will make or break you, that’s only up to you and how your mindset is going into this read. I enjoyed it. It was the kind of roller coaster I love, Emotional.
🖤My Desire is out now, available on KU and ca be purchased on Amazon 🖤
🚨CHECK TRIGGER WARNINGS🚨
May 1, 2025
My Desire by Jess Cody is a compelling exploration of trauma, resilience, and unexpected love, masterfully interwoven with steamy romance and intense emotional moments. The narrative centers around Holly, a young woman whose challenging upbringing in foster care is marked by loss and pain, including the tragic deaths of her parents due to drug overdose. After enduring five harrowing years in an abusive foster home, she finally finds solace in a loving environment, yet she carries the scars of her past.
The plot thickens as Holly's life takes a dramatic turn when she is kidnapped, thrusting her into a precarious situation that catalyzes her transformation. It is during this turmoil, she discovers an intense connection with her best friend’s older brother, Aiden. Aiden embodies the strong, protective figure Holly desperately needs, offering not just romance but a pathway to reclaiming her life from the shadows of her past. The author does not shy away from exploring the complexities of their relationship, which is interlaced with elements of age gap romance and the psychological undertones of Stockholm syndrome, adding depth to their connection.
The writing style is engaging and vivid, effectively immersing readers into Holly’s world. The spicy elements of the story are sure to leave readers feeling breathless and, at times, in need of a cold shower. If you enjoy stories that explore the darker sides of love, age gaps, and the redemptive power of connection, this book is an excellent choice. Jess Cody has crafted a narrative that is both heart-wrenching and exhilarating, making it a must-read for fans of contemporary romance with an edge. Highly recommended! 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
The plot thickens as Holly's life takes a dramatic turn when she is kidnapped, thrusting her into a precarious situation that catalyzes her transformation. It is during this turmoil, she discovers an intense connection with her best friend’s older brother, Aiden. Aiden embodies the strong, protective figure Holly desperately needs, offering not just romance but a pathway to reclaiming her life from the shadows of her past. The author does not shy away from exploring the complexities of their relationship, which is interlaced with elements of age gap romance and the psychological undertones of Stockholm syndrome, adding depth to their connection.
The writing style is engaging and vivid, effectively immersing readers into Holly’s world. The spicy elements of the story are sure to leave readers feeling breathless and, at times, in need of a cold shower. If you enjoy stories that explore the darker sides of love, age gaps, and the redemptive power of connection, this book is an excellent choice. Jess Cody has crafted a narrative that is both heart-wrenching and exhilarating, making it a must-read for fans of contemporary romance with an edge. Highly recommended! 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
April 15, 2025
My Desire is Jess Cody's debut standalone dark romance novel. I enjoy several delicious tropes here, such as the age gap, forced proximity, best friend’s brother, and forbidden love. However, a few heavy topics may trigger folks, like the abuse of a minor, drug addiction, alcoholism, the termination of life, the death of parents, and the foster system.
This dual POV book focuses on Holly and Adian. Holly has suffered abuse at the very hands of the people who are supposed to protect her. The author did not shy away from the painful details of the abuse. Geezus, this girl has had a LOT of trauma. Sadly, in her late teens, she went down a questionable path leading to drug abuse and partying.
Aidan has been infatuated with Holly from a young age, but keeps his distance until she is 17 (and he is 25). His younger sister, Ava, is Holly’s best friend and is going down the same dark path. Wanting to help Holly beat the addiction, he is consumed by her. While he does come across as thoughtful and loving, he does have a much darker side… a cruel side.
The story is packed full of jaw-dropping “encounters” and is a complete rollercoaster. At times, it is difficult to read, but the ending is satisfying. Jess Cody did an incredible job for her debut book.
Thanks to Jess Cody for gifting me an eARC of My Desire. I am leaving this review voluntarily. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
This dual POV book focuses on Holly and Adian. Holly has suffered abuse at the very hands of the people who are supposed to protect her. The author did not shy away from the painful details of the abuse. Geezus, this girl has had a LOT of trauma. Sadly, in her late teens, she went down a questionable path leading to drug abuse and partying.
Aidan has been infatuated with Holly from a young age, but keeps his distance until she is 17 (and he is 25). His younger sister, Ava, is Holly’s best friend and is going down the same dark path. Wanting to help Holly beat the addiction, he is consumed by her. While he does come across as thoughtful and loving, he does have a much darker side… a cruel side.
The story is packed full of jaw-dropping “encounters” and is a complete rollercoaster. At times, it is difficult to read, but the ending is satisfying. Jess Cody did an incredible job for her debut book.
Thanks to Jess Cody for gifting me an eARC of My Desire. I am leaving this review voluntarily. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
August 31, 2025
I have seriously mixed feelings on this. When I picked it up and read the blurb, it sounded like my perfect book, it has every trope i love. I just found it to be confusing.
Whilst it did have tropes I love, the spice was definitely enjoyable and, the premise was great, I felt the pacing or more, accurately the passage of time and the continuity needed work. I found myself getting confused or irritated by small mistakes or oversights it was small things like the fmc falling in mud and then 2 seconds later being wrapped up in a white fluffy blanket with no mention of mud anywhere. I think i would have been able to overlook them, though, if it wasn't also for how confusing some of the character monologue was. I like dark characters that like to headfuck but the hot and cold felt clunky and confusing. I literally had to reread the paragraphs just to make sure I wassnt missing something. It happened so often that it became distracting and made it hard to really immerse myself into the story.
I did enjoy it, it has some really good parts, there's just other parts that for me let it down a bit. That said, for a first novel from an indie author it is still very good and im likely to read more by this person.
Whilst it did have tropes I love, the spice was definitely enjoyable and, the premise was great, I felt the pacing or more, accurately the passage of time and the continuity needed work. I found myself getting confused or irritated by small mistakes or oversights it was small things like the fmc falling in mud and then 2 seconds later being wrapped up in a white fluffy blanket with no mention of mud anywhere. I think i would have been able to overlook them, though, if it wasn't also for how confusing some of the character monologue was. I like dark characters that like to headfuck but the hot and cold felt clunky and confusing. I literally had to reread the paragraphs just to make sure I wassnt missing something. It happened so often that it became distracting and made it hard to really immerse myself into the story.
I did enjoy it, it has some really good parts, there's just other parts that for me let it down a bit. That said, for a first novel from an indie author it is still very good and im likely to read more by this person.
March 16, 2025
Wow wow wow!
when I was allowed to read this book ( acr ) I was already super enthusiastic because I had already had a preview from Jess I was already sold and now I have finished it it is in a word super good you just can't put it down
when holly makes her development you see such a big difference you see that she now gets the love of Aiden and also needs this you don't notice much of the age difference because Aiden is so good to her and he helps so well with everything she needs even when she has had the abortion he continues to support her and this makes that you see holly change throughout the book and that is really well written by jess
And Aiden loves a good game of hide and seek and believe me you gonna scream and yell so good is it
I definitely recommend this book and would give it a big 5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️stars 10 if possible and will definitely re-read it again
🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Age - gap
Knife play
Blood play
Addiction
Dark childhood
Best friend brother
Hide and seek
Foster care
And some good more
when I was allowed to read this book ( acr ) I was already super enthusiastic because I had already had a preview from Jess I was already sold and now I have finished it it is in a word super good you just can't put it down
when holly makes her development you see such a big difference you see that she now gets the love of Aiden and also needs this you don't notice much of the age difference because Aiden is so good to her and he helps so well with everything she needs even when she has had the abortion he continues to support her and this makes that you see holly change throughout the book and that is really well written by jess
And Aiden loves a good game of hide and seek and believe me you gonna scream and yell so good is it
I definitely recommend this book and would give it a big 5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️stars 10 if possible and will definitely re-read it again
🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Age - gap
Knife play
Blood play
Addiction
Dark childhood
Best friend brother
Hide and seek
Foster care
And some good more
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 25, 2025
My honest ARC review of "My Desire" by Jess Cody
Storyline. 4/5⭐️
Characters. 4/5⭐️
🌶️. 4/5⭐️
Storyline was dark. I usually don't like reading dark stories like this, but it makes you think about people who actually go through this kind of stuff, and how they cope.
Read the trigger warnings! If there are multiple things in there that make you doubt, then this book is not for you.
The prologue alone already tried to prepare me for what I was going to dive into.
As for characters, Holly, oh my what things she went through, and even what she is going through with Aidan in present times. I don't know, she is so used and abused. It was so sad and horrifying reading.
Aidan, not sure if I like this character. Ok he has his own skeletons, but shyt, doing what he does with Holly. Hmm. Ok he shows his love to Holly in the only ways he knows how to. So it's all so double.
🌶️ Well, what can I say without giving away too much. Uhm uber kinky, bloody, pointy, lube?🤣🤯🫣
All in all I'm grateful I was given this ARC to read and review.
Is it for me, altho I like dark stories, this was a little bit too dark for me. Hence the lower scores.
But for sure lots of people will appreciate this book more.
It was well written, graphic, ties all the ends. In that area I have no complaints. To write like this while going through a dark time in life yourself, chapeau for writing this piece. It shows the darkness you had inside you that needed to come out.
I hope you are in brighter waters now, would love to read your writings during happier times❤️
Storyline. 4/5⭐️
Characters. 4/5⭐️
🌶️. 4/5⭐️
Storyline was dark. I usually don't like reading dark stories like this, but it makes you think about people who actually go through this kind of stuff, and how they cope.
Read the trigger warnings! If there are multiple things in there that make you doubt, then this book is not for you.
The prologue alone already tried to prepare me for what I was going to dive into.
As for characters, Holly, oh my what things she went through, and even what she is going through with Aidan in present times. I don't know, she is so used and abused. It was so sad and horrifying reading.
Aidan, not sure if I like this character. Ok he has his own skeletons, but shyt, doing what he does with Holly. Hmm. Ok he shows his love to Holly in the only ways he knows how to. So it's all so double.
🌶️ Well, what can I say without giving away too much. Uhm uber kinky, bloody, pointy, lube?🤣🤯🫣
All in all I'm grateful I was given this ARC to read and review.
Is it for me, altho I like dark stories, this was a little bit too dark for me. Hence the lower scores.
But for sure lots of people will appreciate this book more.
It was well written, graphic, ties all the ends. In that area I have no complaints. To write like this while going through a dark time in life yourself, chapeau for writing this piece. It shows the darkness you had inside you that needed to come out.
I hope you are in brighter waters now, would love to read your writings during happier times❤️
March 21, 2025
My Desire gives us a story about a lost girl named Holly who has grown up knowing trauma and torment. Raised to think everything was her fault and that the actions of a grown adult were because she caused it. Along comes her best friend’s brother Aidan who has known her but not fully seen the life she went through.
Aidan becomes obsessed with trying to save Holly from herself when she cannot see it. But will Holly embrace his intentions or keep pushing him away.
I was in awe of Holly’s strength and perseverance to gain her life back. Aidan wanted to pull her out of the darkness and pushed her strong will to make her see that none of her childhood was her fault. The bedroom chemistry between these two was electric and their hide and seek game became more intense each time. Holly may have not thought she would be ever capable of love but Aidan stopped at nothing to prove it even if he had to kidnap her lol.
This book touches on my dark traumatic themes which could be triggering.
Aidan becomes obsessed with trying to save Holly from herself when she cannot see it. But will Holly embrace his intentions or keep pushing him away.
I was in awe of Holly’s strength and perseverance to gain her life back. Aidan wanted to pull her out of the darkness and pushed her strong will to make her see that none of her childhood was her fault. The bedroom chemistry between these two was electric and their hide and seek game became more intense each time. Holly may have not thought she would be ever capable of love but Aidan stopped at nothing to prove it even if he had to kidnap her lol.
This book touches on my dark traumatic themes which could be triggering.
May 20, 2025
3 ⭐️ | 3 🌶️
I can definitely feel, empathize and relate to some of what Holly has gone through. This girl has had it rough. I enjoy a book that the FMC shows some realties that many face from a young age that are not in safe or healthy environments and grow to try to make something of themselves while still going through their journey of resilience.
However, while enjoyed Holly’s journey and the intent behind the authors writing. I really struggled to fully connect with the characters and their relationships with each other. It was very fast paced and sort of rushed that I felt the character development in general could have been built up more I think. I love where the author was going but I think giving readers more of a build up from her past to present, her relationship growing up with Ava and Aiden would have built more connection to the characters. Overall though a great start!
I can definitely feel, empathize and relate to some of what Holly has gone through. This girl has had it rough. I enjoy a book that the FMC shows some realties that many face from a young age that are not in safe or healthy environments and grow to try to make something of themselves while still going through their journey of resilience.
However, while enjoyed Holly’s journey and the intent behind the authors writing. I really struggled to fully connect with the characters and their relationships with each other. It was very fast paced and sort of rushed that I felt the character development in general could have been built up more I think. I love where the author was going but I think giving readers more of a build up from her past to present, her relationship growing up with Ava and Aiden would have built more connection to the characters. Overall though a great start!
March 13, 2025
My Desire by Jess Cody was a great stalker and history of trauma book. It reminds me of Sick Luv so if you liked that book then please pick up this one. I enjoyed the games of cat and mouse throughout the whole book though Aiden does give you whiplash with all of his moods of anger to sweetness. I appreciated how Holly showed growth from her drug addiction that stemmed from her trauma to being able to truly love her self on a more day to day basis. Aiden is a true I would die and kill for her kind of guy, and he actually did one of those in the book 🫦. If you also enjoy some bondage play then this book has plenty of it for you in all kinds of places. I highly recommend this quick dark romance though read the triggers, or if you are like me then it’s a light pick me up due to our black souls.
March 24, 2025
I had high hopes for this book. I was quickly enraged. If age gaps involving minors is not your thing I would avoid this one. As a parent reading a 25 year old adult waiting for a 17 year old was bothersome. This man waited for her starting when she was 15 and he was 23. Even the MMC's sister was 17 with a 29 year old fiance. The way that the MMC talked about the FMC even going as far as calling her a stupid b*tch for playing a game he wanted to play. The MMC gaslights and essentially grooms the FMC from 15 to 18. I did not enjoy this book. The only reason I am giving it 2 stars is because of the MMC getting the FMC closure for her past and supporting her getting clean from d*ugs.
I read this as an ARC.
I read this as an ARC.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 6, 2025
My Desire is a really good book. Holly grew up in foster care after her parents died from a drug overdose when she was 10 years old. She spent 5 years in an abusive foster home to be moved to a loving one. She only had two things from her old life, her best friend and a drug addiction. Being kidnapped and falling for her best friend’s older brother, Aiden, wasn’t her plan. But without him, she’d still be stripping to pay bills, or she’d be dead. The spice in this book will have anyone needing a cold shower. 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ I highly recommend this book if you like age gaps, hate sex, and Stockholm syndrome vibes.
April 13, 2025
Absolutely stunning!
This book is so dark and so beautifully written! I instantly fell in love with the characters and their story. I loved learning about what a horrible life Holly had go through and her journey as she got old. Aidan is delicious and I love how dark yet passionate he is.
Please, please, please check the trigger warnings before you read this book. There are some very descriptive scenes that may upset some.
Jess Cody, I need more books from you, maybe even a second book for these characters? You are a talented writer and I can’t wait to see what you do next. I wi definitely be reading any books you publish!
This book is so dark and so beautifully written! I instantly fell in love with the characters and their story. I loved learning about what a horrible life Holly had go through and her journey as she got old. Aidan is delicious and I love how dark yet passionate he is.
Please, please, please check the trigger warnings before you read this book. There are some very descriptive scenes that may upset some.
Jess Cody, I need more books from you, maybe even a second book for these characters? You are a talented writer and I can’t wait to see what you do next. I wi definitely be reading any books you publish!
May 1, 2025
An amazing debut novel, this story had me hooked from the very first page.
Holly has been through so much and her actions reflected that quite a bit but then she gave me a little bit of whiplash and Aidan, honestly I hated to love him - I found the gaslighting a bit much.
Definitely check triggers before starting this book, it has some very heavy content. If you don't like stories that involve minors (FMC is 17, MMC is 25) I would probably skip this. Despite the content though, I read it in one sitting and found it to be engaging and entertaining.
Interested to see what's next for this author.
Holly has been through so much and her actions reflected that quite a bit but then she gave me a little bit of whiplash and Aidan, honestly I hated to love him - I found the gaslighting a bit much.
Definitely check triggers before starting this book, it has some very heavy content. If you don't like stories that involve minors (FMC is 17, MMC is 25) I would probably skip this. Despite the content though, I read it in one sitting and found it to be engaging and entertaining.
Interested to see what's next for this author.
May 7, 2025
Dark and twisted romance is my jam! And this book delivered on both of those!
I really enjoyed diving into the FMC’s traumatic childhood and how it caused her to be the person she is today, which is totally understanding.
However, the MMC kind of threw me off a little bit. Obviously I was picking up on his psychotic tendencies and dark thoughts, but some of the things he did made me feel like he wasn’t fully understanding of the FMC’s trauma and that kind of turned me off a little.
Overall though, this book captured my attention and it had a good development and plot that made me enjoy it until the end!
I really enjoyed diving into the FMC’s traumatic childhood and how it caused her to be the person she is today, which is totally understanding.
However, the MMC kind of threw me off a little bit. Obviously I was picking up on his psychotic tendencies and dark thoughts, but some of the things he did made me feel like he wasn’t fully understanding of the FMC’s trauma and that kind of turned me off a little.
Overall though, this book captured my attention and it had a good development and plot that made me enjoy it until the end!
April 19, 2025
OH MY HEART!!!!
Aidan and Holly's story was so amazing!!!! Holly had a very hard life growing up and Aidan just wants Holly and to make everything better for her. OH! Did I tell you Aidan is the brother of Ava?? Well, Ava is Holly's best friend!!! The spice in this book is delicious and the kinks are *Chef's kiss*!! I did truly adore the plot of the book and Jess did a fantastic job of making me do so!! Definitely make sure to.....
CHECK YOUR TRIGGERS!!!
Definitely check this story out, I couldn't put it down!! Definitely a HEA!!
Aidan and Holly's story was so amazing!!!! Holly had a very hard life growing up and Aidan just wants Holly and to make everything better for her. OH! Did I tell you Aidan is the brother of Ava?? Well, Ava is Holly's best friend!!! The spice in this book is delicious and the kinks are *Chef's kiss*!! I did truly adore the plot of the book and Jess did a fantastic job of making me do so!! Definitely make sure to.....
CHECK YOUR TRIGGERS!!!
Definitely check this story out, I couldn't put it down!! Definitely a HEA!!
May 28, 2025
Wasn't a fan
This story was hard to get through, not because of the concepts, but because the writing was phrased very awkwardly. It almost seemed translated from another language or something. Also, it did not show the passage of time very well...having weeks go by in the characters timeline, but not really making it clear. Also, they didn't quite make the Aidan character believable in the hot/cold love/hate thing...it was clunky, and felt kinda juvenile in the sudden switches back and forth.
This story was hard to get through, not because of the concepts, but because the writing was phrased very awkwardly. It almost seemed translated from another language or something. Also, it did not show the passage of time very well...having weeks go by in the characters timeline, but not really making it clear. Also, they didn't quite make the Aidan character believable in the hot/cold love/hate thing...it was clunky, and felt kinda juvenile in the sudden switches back and forth.
March 10, 2025
What a wild ride our poor fmc Holly has lived a NASTY traumatic life while her best friend lives an amazing life including the brother Aidan.. we find out the brother likes Holly and when some of the choices she makes leads him to taking drastic precautions to ensure she doesn’t end up like her bio parents… even through the chaos can they make it past so many stigmas to their relationship and Holly dark past? Or overcome Aidan INSANE possessive and controlling manner???
April 1, 2025
⭐️x4
🌶x4
Let's play Hide and Seek!
I really enjoyed this book. Dark themes, read the triggers. This book may be shorter, but there was still a lot to the story. Awful childhood, growing and over coming trauma. Possessive MMC. And a relationship that might make some uncomfortable. But I loved watching the connection and relationship grow!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
My Desire by Jess Cody
To Be Released:4/30/25
Pgs ~227
🌶x4
Let's play Hide and Seek!
I really enjoyed this book. Dark themes, read the triggers. This book may be shorter, but there was still a lot to the story. Awful childhood, growing and over coming trauma. Possessive MMC. And a relationship that might make some uncomfortable. But I loved watching the connection and relationship grow!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
My Desire by Jess Cody
To Be Released:4/30/25
Pgs ~227
April 8, 2025
Before i write my review i just want to say *READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS* ………
This book was so so dark but such an amazing read. Holly was stubborn and reserved with her love. Aiden was in denial and totally head over heels obsessed. I loved the banter and the love-hate relationship these two gave! The spice was extremely spicy🥵 There are some really dark themes in this book so make sure you read the Trigger Warnings. I look forward to reading more of Jess Cody’s books.
Spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
This book was so so dark but such an amazing read. Holly was stubborn and reserved with her love. Aiden was in denial and totally head over heels obsessed. I loved the banter and the love-hate relationship these two gave! The spice was extremely spicy🥵 There are some really dark themes in this book so make sure you read the Trigger Warnings. I look forward to reading more of Jess Cody’s books.
Spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
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