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Counting Crows
Tina, now in her 40s, is a famous Iranian painter living in Manhattan, but her life is fraying at the seams. Raised in the chaos of 90s Tehran, where the American dream and rock music flickered like dreams never come true, Tina grew up fighting for a freedom that always felt like a crime. Now, married to a great husband with her dream job and life, she’s struggling in ways she never expected. Stuck in a creative block for her latest career-defining project, Self.
Amidst this struggle, memories of a boy named Gus returns. Their accidental meetings in the dive bars and cafés of Grand Rapids. Right places, wrong times, and feelings that are left unresolved. Her search for him becomes a borderline obsession, as she’s convinced that finding Gus could be the key to unlocking the art—and the self—she’s lost.
3 Endings Option
Tina's Perspective on Lover's Rock story by Aaron Paul Schaut
Amidst this struggle, memories of a boy named Gus returns. Their accidental meetings in the dive bars and cafés of Grand Rapids. Right places, wrong times, and feelings that are left unresolved. Her search for him becomes a borderline obsession, as she’s convinced that finding Gus could be the key to unlocking the art—and the self—she’s lost.
3 Endings Option
Tina's Perspective on Lover's Rock story by Aaron Paul Schaut
153 pages, Paperback
Published October 29, 2024
2 people are currently reading
5 people want to read
About the author
Neda Aria
26 books47 followersI write, I create, I build worlds in my imagination. Writing is my soul, creating is my passion. I write to explore the human mind, I write to reveal what's beneath that beautiful mask of yours. I uncover the darkness within. I dare to free words, I dare to be brave, I dare to say what others afraid to say.
I write, I create. That's all I am.
I write, I create. That's all I am.
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
January 30, 2025
A story of unrequited love told skillfully in first person with flashbacks and flash forwards. Most fascinating and sometimes bleak are the portions telling of a young woman escaping the oppressive laws of her home country, Tehran. There are lighthearted moments throughout but the flames of passion between the protagonist and the man she may or may not be in love with definitely smolder. This is a companion to another book, Lover’s Rock, which accompanies this story from the perspective of the male character. This sometimes borders on the saccharine, but that’s okay because it’s told with open emotions and a naked heart. And lots of music from Guns N Roses.
February 6, 2025
Companion to Lover’s Rock. Glad I read that first, not that you must, but because it was immediately fun to hear how the woman perceived Gus vs. how I did. I found his lines cheesy but she isn’t even aware he has them—or maybe he just uses them on the reader. Also because this is easier for me to read, a more feminine flow I’m more familiar w/.
So many concepts are immediately brought up w/o overwhelming the reader: being an Iranian (now NY) woman w/ the teenage love of Gus many years ago in Grand Rapids, being unsatisfied w/ her painting career and husband who she’s reluctant to have a child w/ even if she could or was young enough or in general, especially after having to step up for her sister as a teen when her mom was partying. Lots of calm longing, no meandering prose to slog the pace.
Flashbacks of being in ‘90s Tehran as a girl are obviously difficult. Maybe I’m dumb but it’s both more and less draconian than I’d thought. Or at least because the MC is so rebellious and many of the teens curse as badly as Americans at each other, scrappy and funnily vulgar. I figured there’d be more decorum or respect for elders like in the far East. Though she gets cat called, chased, and there’s lots of casual allusions to pedophilia or incest w/ the excuse that Allah’s wife was 9. Footnotes are aplenty to get cultural context.
She’s called a prostitute by teachers for not covering her hair and could be expelled over clear nail polish. TBH, I didn’t know they’d have skate parks in that country or at least not ones girls could go to—and the family (presumably not Muslim) of women are never escorted around by men because the dad is a deadbeat, often away on vacationish ventures drug dealing and falling into his own supply.
The mom is jealous of the daughter since she’s not the one beat, yet also assumes the dad will come to perv on her though it seems so be in her head as competition. Not surprised she lets her get assaulted elsewhere. It’s ironic and obviously sexist the courts would perhaps kill the mom for adultery but not the dad for his “half ton of drugs.”
It’s interesting and makes you grateful to hear about someone longing for the American dream via a secret shop selling Western movies, Guns N’ Roses type music and 90121 DVDs. The rave scene in Grand Rapids is my fav and this book has many ch song titles I’m familiar w/ (Nirvana, No Doubt) compared to Lover’s Rock.
Love the comparison to horny men being like flies on a cake, so funny. Or calling the headmaster a hedgehog whore. Or the phrases “steady after the storm” and “Demolished like Miley Cyrus ran into me with her wrecking ball.”—so crazy that line came up for me right as a Miley song started to play on the radio.
Good backstory weave-in through convo with the art dealer. She says she’s not nostalgic yet probably just because she still wishes she lived in the budding relationship in Michigan she had in the rock clubs. Like she’s doing a fake it til you make it mindset.
Witty slick banter at the end, sometimes drunkenly cheesy though in a way that suits them. I never found Gus attractive until then—and even then, not my type but entertaining. Maybe he’s rubbed off on her w/ those lines. Like with her push and pull playing with making a move, I think reading the books in either order has its emotional pros and cons dependent on what a reader wants from a romance, a good dice role.
I would have liked more about Manhattan but I’m glad the painting wasn’t a huge focus because it would get repetitive to describe pictures—at least if I wrote it. I feel the assault coulda had more detail, not graphic-wise but w/ another poetic cutting line or a smidge of her typical tough talking or stronger emphasis on what she thought during, a bit more than not wanting her sis to see. I like this is a more realistic, character focused romance than most but I still prefer the author’s novel Bella Donna in general because it’s more up my alley with an age gap and more traditional swooning.
So many concepts are immediately brought up w/o overwhelming the reader: being an Iranian (now NY) woman w/ the teenage love of Gus many years ago in Grand Rapids, being unsatisfied w/ her painting career and husband who she’s reluctant to have a child w/ even if she could or was young enough or in general, especially after having to step up for her sister as a teen when her mom was partying. Lots of calm longing, no meandering prose to slog the pace.
Flashbacks of being in ‘90s Tehran as a girl are obviously difficult. Maybe I’m dumb but it’s both more and less draconian than I’d thought. Or at least because the MC is so rebellious and many of the teens curse as badly as Americans at each other, scrappy and funnily vulgar. I figured there’d be more decorum or respect for elders like in the far East. Though she gets cat called, chased, and there’s lots of casual allusions to pedophilia or incest w/ the excuse that Allah’s wife was 9. Footnotes are aplenty to get cultural context.
She’s called a prostitute by teachers for not covering her hair and could be expelled over clear nail polish. TBH, I didn’t know they’d have skate parks in that country or at least not ones girls could go to—and the family (presumably not Muslim) of women are never escorted around by men because the dad is a deadbeat, often away on vacationish ventures drug dealing and falling into his own supply.
The mom is jealous of the daughter since she’s not the one beat, yet also assumes the dad will come to perv on her though it seems so be in her head as competition. Not surprised she lets her get assaulted elsewhere. It’s ironic and obviously sexist the courts would perhaps kill the mom for adultery but not the dad for his “half ton of drugs.”
It’s interesting and makes you grateful to hear about someone longing for the American dream via a secret shop selling Western movies, Guns N’ Roses type music and 90121 DVDs. The rave scene in Grand Rapids is my fav and this book has many ch song titles I’m familiar w/ (Nirvana, No Doubt) compared to Lover’s Rock.
Love the comparison to horny men being like flies on a cake, so funny. Or calling the headmaster a hedgehog whore. Or the phrases “steady after the storm” and “Demolished like Miley Cyrus ran into me with her wrecking ball.”—so crazy that line came up for me right as a Miley song started to play on the radio.
Good backstory weave-in through convo with the art dealer. She says she’s not nostalgic yet probably just because she still wishes she lived in the budding relationship in Michigan she had in the rock clubs. Like she’s doing a fake it til you make it mindset.
Witty slick banter at the end, sometimes drunkenly cheesy though in a way that suits them. I never found Gus attractive until then—and even then, not my type but entertaining. Maybe he’s rubbed off on her w/ those lines. Like with her push and pull playing with making a move, I think reading the books in either order has its emotional pros and cons dependent on what a reader wants from a romance, a good dice role.
I would have liked more about Manhattan but I’m glad the painting wasn’t a huge focus because it would get repetitive to describe pictures—at least if I wrote it. I feel the assault coulda had more detail, not graphic-wise but w/ another poetic cutting line or a smidge of her typical tough talking or stronger emphasis on what she thought during, a bit more than not wanting her sis to see. I like this is a more realistic, character focused romance than most but I still prefer the author’s novel Bella Donna in general because it’s more up my alley with an age gap and more traditional swooning.
April 14, 2025
This story told through two sides (This book and Lovers Rock by Aaron Schaut) is such an interesting premise! Seeing the difference in recollection of moments was very cool and a lovely idea.
In this book in particular, I loved the writing style and her approach. The story was so interesting and wove the past and present together expertly. It did feel as if focus needed to shift more towards one storyline or the other in order to any of them justice. Whether the main focus was the Iran portion, the 90s Michigan portion, or the present....one of them needed more page time/exploration.
In this book in particular, I loved the writing style and her approach. The story was so interesting and wove the past and present together expertly. It did feel as if focus needed to shift more towards one storyline or the other in order to any of them justice. Whether the main focus was the Iran portion, the 90s Michigan portion, or the present....one of them needed more page time/exploration.
February 23, 2025
I read this book after reading Lover's Rock. I found this perspective to be far more enjoyable. Delving into the main character's past really added to who she became and why.
Unfortunately, for all of her past, we never heard of it again. It was never brought up with Gus and seemed to have no other purpose except for the readers' knowledge.
But, I understand that this is a short story. Only so much depth is possible.
I enjoyed her personality. She seemed spicy.
Unfortunately, for all of her past, we never heard of it again. It was never brought up with Gus and seemed to have no other purpose except for the readers' knowledge.
But, I understand that this is a short story. Only so much depth is possible.
I enjoyed her personality. She seemed spicy.
January 27, 2025
'What are we running from? Who are we pretending to be?'
Counting Crows is a work that shows no matter who you are or what you have been through in your life, our struggles and tribulations as human beings are universal. From the first page to the last I was hooked, and though the story in and of itself is something so foreign to my own life experience, I find myself relating to it in such a gutteral, primordial way; that feeling that is both inexplicably deep and objectively empty, the feelings that control you, that haunt you and that drive you as a human being wether it is as an outlet for art, creativity or the person you wish you were.
Tina's struggles between her mind and her reality will sit with you long after you have finished this book. It is a deeply personal story that embraces you with a loving hug of existential ennui. Aria's poetic flow and her way with words will leave you both sombre and hopeful all at once and hopefully may trigger some comforting self reflection of your own.
Counting Crows is a work that shows no matter who you are or what you have been through in your life, our struggles and tribulations as human beings are universal. From the first page to the last I was hooked, and though the story in and of itself is something so foreign to my own life experience, I find myself relating to it in such a gutteral, primordial way; that feeling that is both inexplicably deep and objectively empty, the feelings that control you, that haunt you and that drive you as a human being wether it is as an outlet for art, creativity or the person you wish you were.
Tina's struggles between her mind and her reality will sit with you long after you have finished this book. It is a deeply personal story that embraces you with a loving hug of existential ennui. Aria's poetic flow and her way with words will leave you both sombre and hopeful all at once and hopefully may trigger some comforting self reflection of your own.
March 18, 2025
For anyone interested in a one-sitting read that poignantly explores a desperate dream for freedom, or for readers who want to connect with a character that has a longing for that "what-if" person in her life. If you fall into either of those categories, then this book is for you.
The narrator, Tina, struggles with the oppressive Iranian culture before leaving for America; then in America, she faces a different kind of oppression when learning what it feels like to wonder what her life might have been like had things gone differently after meeting the first person who seemed to understand her. Relatable to different people through a few different avenues, I connected most with those aspects of this book!
The narrator, Tina, struggles with the oppressive Iranian culture before leaving for America; then in America, she faces a different kind of oppression when learning what it feels like to wonder what her life might have been like had things gone differently after meeting the first person who seemed to understand her. Relatable to different people through a few different avenues, I connected most with those aspects of this book!
March 13, 2025
Warning: some spoilers
Counting Crows, Iranian-born Neda Aria’s latest novel, is an unflinching story of unrequited love and romantic attachment, an exciting blend of noir and fantasy that interweaves as the narrator shifts from past to present and back trying to unravel the mystery of her longing. The past in Tehran, a “prison” for women in general, is where the young narrator, Pahlavi, a rebel, gets kicked out of school, but she is also her broken family’s savior. Her father, a druggie, is never there, and when he is hauled off to prison, Pahlavi’s mother’s life unravels, even as Pahlavi tries to create a semblance of stability for her ill and erratic parent and vulnerable younger sister Taraneh.
Teenage Pahlavi is a wild, artistic spirit longing for a higher education and escape to America, her idyllic country. Money is the main obstacle keeping her back and the lack of it nearly drives her to the brink while she, her mother and sister are forced to live with a domineering grandfather in a sterile and controlling environment after Pahlavi's father's imprisonment. Finally a moment of good fortune strikes when Pahlavi’s mentor and friend Pari finds a couple willing to sponsor the aspiring artist’s trip to America and her higher education.
In the U.S., in Michigan, Pahlavi, who has changed her name to Tina, strives to fulfill her artistic ambitions, all the while full of doubts, missing her mother and sister, but not Tehran. A young man she meets in a bar, Gus, echoes her lostness and confusion, becoming a romantic escape and the tether between Tina’s lost and awakening self. Tina and Gus get drunk, go to raves, seem to connect, but their times together are spontaneous and fleeting, until they lose touch.
In the present, Tina lives in New York with her husband Henry, a solid, hard-working man, with whom she is trying to conceive, and she has found artistic success. While on the surface her life seems fulfilled, she still fantasizes about Gus, wonders where he is, her near obsession interfering with a defining, artistic project and her marriage to a practical, and caring man. Perturbed with Tina’s dark moods and unswerving dedication to her art, Henry finally convinces Tina to revisit Michigan, to take care of lingering issues, and they travel there together.
In Michigan, Tina shows Henry the bars and hot spots where she and Gus used to hang out, but finds everything changed. They are sitting outdoors at a café when Gus passes by with a woman, turns and decides to meet up with Henry and Tina and introduces Lily. The foursome spends time together and Gus and Tina do what they’d never done before, exchange numbers.
One night Gus calls and asks Tina to meet him, which she does. Reuniting this time alone, secrets leak out as they survey their past together. The narrator shifts back in memory to that night in the late 90s when after a long drunken night of teasing one another she and Gus finally had sex. Revisiting that time together in the present reignites passion and Gus returns a memento Tina left in his bed.
Counting Crows is richly emotional, full of musical references that pull at cultural and nostalgic threads of love throughout. The symbol of crows pursues the narrator in Tehran, urging her on. When Pahlavi’s (Tina’s) father is caught with a stash of opium, for example, and dragged off to prison, the narrator observes, “Crows cawed…Fucking birds. Always hanging around, waiting for something to die.”
Ultimately it’s the lingering past that has to die for the narrator, the hankering for home with her mother and sister in Tehran and the longing for a lost man in America, whose love might lead nowhere.
More than a dark, multi-cultural story about a punk kid from Iran with the guts to leave everything and venture into a new land to fulfill her artistic dreams, Counting Crows is a haunting exploration of the nature of longing and its powerful, unrelenting force in the life of a driven artist.
Counting Crows, Iranian-born Neda Aria’s latest novel, is an unflinching story of unrequited love and romantic attachment, an exciting blend of noir and fantasy that interweaves as the narrator shifts from past to present and back trying to unravel the mystery of her longing. The past in Tehran, a “prison” for women in general, is where the young narrator, Pahlavi, a rebel, gets kicked out of school, but she is also her broken family’s savior. Her father, a druggie, is never there, and when he is hauled off to prison, Pahlavi’s mother’s life unravels, even as Pahlavi tries to create a semblance of stability for her ill and erratic parent and vulnerable younger sister Taraneh.
Teenage Pahlavi is a wild, artistic spirit longing for a higher education and escape to America, her idyllic country. Money is the main obstacle keeping her back and the lack of it nearly drives her to the brink while she, her mother and sister are forced to live with a domineering grandfather in a sterile and controlling environment after Pahlavi's father's imprisonment. Finally a moment of good fortune strikes when Pahlavi’s mentor and friend Pari finds a couple willing to sponsor the aspiring artist’s trip to America and her higher education.
In the U.S., in Michigan, Pahlavi, who has changed her name to Tina, strives to fulfill her artistic ambitions, all the while full of doubts, missing her mother and sister, but not Tehran. A young man she meets in a bar, Gus, echoes her lostness and confusion, becoming a romantic escape and the tether between Tina’s lost and awakening self. Tina and Gus get drunk, go to raves, seem to connect, but their times together are spontaneous and fleeting, until they lose touch.
In the present, Tina lives in New York with her husband Henry, a solid, hard-working man, with whom she is trying to conceive, and she has found artistic success. While on the surface her life seems fulfilled, she still fantasizes about Gus, wonders where he is, her near obsession interfering with a defining, artistic project and her marriage to a practical, and caring man. Perturbed with Tina’s dark moods and unswerving dedication to her art, Henry finally convinces Tina to revisit Michigan, to take care of lingering issues, and they travel there together.
In Michigan, Tina shows Henry the bars and hot spots where she and Gus used to hang out, but finds everything changed. They are sitting outdoors at a café when Gus passes by with a woman, turns and decides to meet up with Henry and Tina and introduces Lily. The foursome spends time together and Gus and Tina do what they’d never done before, exchange numbers.
One night Gus calls and asks Tina to meet him, which she does. Reuniting this time alone, secrets leak out as they survey their past together. The narrator shifts back in memory to that night in the late 90s when after a long drunken night of teasing one another she and Gus finally had sex. Revisiting that time together in the present reignites passion and Gus returns a memento Tina left in his bed.
Counting Crows is richly emotional, full of musical references that pull at cultural and nostalgic threads of love throughout. The symbol of crows pursues the narrator in Tehran, urging her on. When Pahlavi’s (Tina’s) father is caught with a stash of opium, for example, and dragged off to prison, the narrator observes, “Crows cawed…Fucking birds. Always hanging around, waiting for something to die.”
Ultimately it’s the lingering past that has to die for the narrator, the hankering for home with her mother and sister in Tehran and the longing for a lost man in America, whose love might lead nowhere.
More than a dark, multi-cultural story about a punk kid from Iran with the guts to leave everything and venture into a new land to fulfill her artistic dreams, Counting Crows is a haunting exploration of the nature of longing and its powerful, unrelenting force in the life of a driven artist.
March 11, 2025
A beautifully executed example of powerful prose. Aria explores deep issues of abuse, addiction and depression that so often go hand in hand. There’s a musical element that accompanies Aria’s writing perfectly and enhances the reader’s experience. An exquisite writer who has such a grasp on language. This book will leave you moved and raw with emotion.
March 24, 2025
This book satisfied my craving for a dark romance, flawed-characters, no-happy-ending tale. I understand this is a short story, but I would have loved to see more depth re: Tina's relationship with her identity as a Persian woman *in the very white Midwest* and maybe more commentary on the childhood trauma that led to her pathological attachment to Gus (like just randomly dropping a history of SA in a couple of sentences and never addressing it felt off).
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 21, 2025
This beautiful novel hit me right in the gut. Not only did it explore something that I’ve experienced in my own life—the fascination with another person that can almost border on neurotic at times—but it wove this theme into a time period that was one of the most intense time periods in my own life, the mid to late 1990s. Every chapter title in the book is a different song title, and just reading those titles brought a flood of emotion rushing back to me. If you were a teenager in the 1990s, you’ll definitely get it, and I guarantee it will take you back to those years and all the intensity that came with them.
This story moves back and forth between the 1990s, when the protagonist was an adolescent/young adult and current-day life, when the protagonist is now a woman in her 40s, navigating mid life and creative blocks, even though she’s become a successful artist. She’s questioning everything—her partnership with her husband, her continued growth (or lack thereof), and the way the possibilities of life seem to narrow as we age and how that feels. This was one of the most insightful depictions I’ve ever seen of what the inner psychological landscape looks like during the midlife transition for a person, and it very accurately described what I’ve felt in my own life. There is a real sadness and confusion that sets in when you enter the midlife phase and you can see the contrast between how all paths seemed open and available to you when you were a teenager, and now you have this awareness that you’ve chosen your path, and in saying yes to the path you’re on, you also had to say no to all the other possible paths that could have been. This is one of the main themes of the book that I just fell into and absolutely loved, this awareness of the person looking back at the paths they chose not to pursue, and the grief and loss we feel when we see all that could have been, but never was.
As part of the story takes place in Iran in the 1990s, and it was also really interesting to see the contrast between Iranian culture at that time and American culture. I felt a mixture of nostalgia for my own past, while also being intrigued to see how things were playing out in a country with a very different political climate at that time.
Overall I highly recommend this book to anyone who likes fiction that pushes the boundaries, psychological, character-driven fiction, and literary fiction focused on deeper themes. Excellent book.
This story moves back and forth between the 1990s, when the protagonist was an adolescent/young adult and current-day life, when the protagonist is now a woman in her 40s, navigating mid life and creative blocks, even though she’s become a successful artist. She’s questioning everything—her partnership with her husband, her continued growth (or lack thereof), and the way the possibilities of life seem to narrow as we age and how that feels. This was one of the most insightful depictions I’ve ever seen of what the inner psychological landscape looks like during the midlife transition for a person, and it very accurately described what I’ve felt in my own life. There is a real sadness and confusion that sets in when you enter the midlife phase and you can see the contrast between how all paths seemed open and available to you when you were a teenager, and now you have this awareness that you’ve chosen your path, and in saying yes to the path you’re on, you also had to say no to all the other possible paths that could have been. This is one of the main themes of the book that I just fell into and absolutely loved, this awareness of the person looking back at the paths they chose not to pursue, and the grief and loss we feel when we see all that could have been, but never was.
As part of the story takes place in Iran in the 1990s, and it was also really interesting to see the contrast between Iranian culture at that time and American culture. I felt a mixture of nostalgia for my own past, while also being intrigued to see how things were playing out in a country with a very different political climate at that time.
Overall I highly recommend this book to anyone who likes fiction that pushes the boundaries, psychological, character-driven fiction, and literary fiction focused on deeper themes. Excellent book.
February 7, 2025
I always enjoy stories that come from different perspectives and cultures than my own. Seeing the differences and the similarities in the human experience. In this story we experience what its like to be a teenager in 90's Tehran, then transition to Michigan, and again to modern day New York.
Engaging and well written, I was sucked into Tina's story, her search for self, and struggles with her feelings with Gus, her family, her husband, and herself. Though the experiences might be different than my own, they are certainly relatable. This is a great story and I highly recommend it.
Engaging and well written, I was sucked into Tina's story, her search for self, and struggles with her feelings with Gus, her family, her husband, and herself. Though the experiences might be different than my own, they are certainly relatable. This is a great story and I highly recommend it.
January 26, 2025
Fantastic!
I had a blast with this one. I seriously enjoyed everything about it: the story, the characters, the song-title chapters, and, most of all, the writing. I'm looking forward to reading more by Aria. Highly recommended!
I had a blast with this one. I seriously enjoyed everything about it: the story, the characters, the song-title chapters, and, most of all, the writing. I'm looking forward to reading more by Aria. Highly recommended!
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews