Julia thought her life was finally getting better when she pulled herself up from nothing to run a successful restaurant and fell in love with the most amazing man--someone with whom she finally feels comfortable and at home. With an abusive past and a history of suicidal depression, she's come an awfully long way, only to find her battles with horror are only beginning. Julia spontaneously uses unexplained powers to save a trapped child from burning to death one day, and the explanation follows closely on this event's heels: the Archangel Gabriel appears to her and admits he is her father. So many experiences are explained in that instant, but Julia is also angry that her father had the power to protect her and yet let her suffer throughout her childhood--to the point that she almost took her own life. As she begins to investigate what it means to be half angel--with the help of the kindly Archangel Michael--she also looks into her past, her human ancestry, and the destiny that's been guiding so many of her experiences. Soon she comes face to face with an initially unnamed evil that the angels don't know how to fight, because its properties of death and decay seem to originate outside of known existence. Julia must suffer more devastating personal loss and danger beyond imagining as she helps guide the angels in detecting and fighting it, but it isn't long before she's no longer supporting them in their goal; she's leading.
Premise-wise, I feel like I tripped over a few glitches (the angels' "home" setting felt a little stark and blank; the angels' occasional contradictions as they professed to be observing all the time but also don't know certain very big, basic things about important characters; the ultimate purpose, origin, and fate of the evil force in the book being left a little murky; the conspiracy theories amongst the angels just kinda not going anywhere by the end), but I'm honestly not a plot girl, so that's forgivable for me in exchange for what's so great about the book. I really like how real Julia felt whenever she was reveling in her humanity. There were so many felt moments--especially when she was grieving or angry--that felt so raw and real. Most books use death as just a Thing That Happens and the characters cry and move on, but Julia never did that when she lost someone incredibly close to her. Not only did she go through some shock and retreating into her memories and post-traumatic stress disorder reactions that made her not want to drive the car that she associated with the death, but she continues to feel the grief as she moves on from it. She has a relationship with the left-behind loved ones of the deceased. She attends a funeral. She wears black. She aches at the scent of items that belonged to the person she lost and spontaneously cries over missed opportunities to share their future. Admittedly, making me cry isn't that difficult, but yeah, I cried a lot while reading this thing.
There were a few things that kept me from enjoying it all the way up to five stars, in addition to those mentioned above; I have a pet peeve about characters crying one tear when they're sad, and this book did that like over and over. Single tear, lone tear, one tear rolling down her cheek--I was emotionally connected to Julia when she cried, but seeing it described like that almost every time made me think "can we instead maybe see her eyes well up or her trying to hold tears in or her vision getting blurry or . . . just some indication of crying without one tear coming out of one eye?" And while I appreciated that angels aren't humans and they have their own ways of expressing themselves, I found it distracting that their wings were described over and over again in accordance with their emotions. It was clear that angels DO make facial expressions and do stuff like cross their arms, so all the wing-flaring and wing-raising and wing-tensing and whatnot felt a little too relied upon for conveying the angels' emotional states while reminding us they're angels. And I thought in comparison to the long lead-up to battling the A'nwel, the ending of the book was so swift that it felt like it landed somewhere short of the finish line I was expecting. Julia brought up some questions and implications while hunting the thing and I felt like they were being built up for the climax, but I guess they're being delivered in the sequel, not the resolution.
Other thoughts: I really like that there was a car accident on, like, page two, sucking us in immediately so Julia does something and makes us care--throws a mystery at us and doesn't make us wait around. And I like that she feels so conflicted about her dad being the Archangel Gabriel, and that finding him wasn't some saccharine completion for her. I like that one time Michael was pulled away from all the duties he was performing simultaneously and he had to reinstate those processes, which made me think he must live a lot like a Web browser with too many tabs open--processing power spread too thinly, having to try to recover them if they're lost. I liked that Julia's depression and history was revealed naturally when wanting to live after the accident felt foreign to her. I like that after weird things happened she wanted to confide in her best friend but realistically flip-flopped on what to reveal. I liked the foreshadowing techniques. I liked when the angels argued about how to contact Julia, though all the mentions of them literally standing on clouds and parting them to look down struck me as--I guess just weird, and so picturesque that I sort of wanted it to be something less storybookish to match the grittiness of the rest. (At least nobody sat around with a harp while singing, though.)
I'm not sure how I feel about an angel appearing to outright mock evolution at one point, but I guess the Biblical origins of their characters would kinda lead to that. (But since their version of reality did allow for different depictions of God all being "real," I'm not sure why the "monkeys, really?" scoffing happened.) Oh, and here's something else I thought was clever: Julia did a lot of things the angels didn't really expect (or even fully understand), so they acted a lot like humans do when they don't comprehend what's going on. They feared her, essentially, and flipped out when she kept doing things they thought she shouldn't have been able to do. There was one bit of foreshadowing (with four characters getting employment interviews and three of them just not showing up, with the fourth being a creepy guy) that I was relieved the story didn't try to bury it and hide it from me; Julia immediately figured something HAD to be up with a bunch of no-shows on interviews. (I'm a little confused about what ended up going on with this guy, though--what the full story was behind why he did what he did.) And I like the book's presentation of free will; since they state that Julia does what she does partly because she can, they're implying that they, as angels, aren't actually free at all, which is sort of sad and intriguing.
And finally, I liked that at its heart the story was about relationships--with our significant others, our closest friends, our parents, our heroes, ourselves. I especially liked the resolution of Julia's relationship with Gabriel. For her whole life she'd yearned for a family, and when she got part of hers back she couldn't stop being angry at him for his failure to protect her, his absence from her life, and his continued refusal to be human enough for her. I like that it is mostly Michael who is more fatherly to her throughout the book, and that there is some acknowledgment of the hurt, the comfort, and the bond she and Gabriel have together without putting a bow on it and making her a complete person and all that stuff stories like this often do to damaged women with daddy issues. It's really pretty unique in that regard, and I appreciate that a lot.
And one more thing: I see you with your coffee-obsessed protagonist, Michelle. ;)